The Wedding Date

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INT. KAT’S ROOM

The door CLICKS shut and the happy couple separates

instantly. Kat to one side of the room, Nick to the other.

Kat’s childhood bedroom has an aggressively floral decor.

KAT
Sorry about the creepy room. I
went through a painfully earnest
Laura-Ashley phase.

Kat takes a brown envelope out of her purse, opens it, and
removes A STACK OF HUNDREDS.

She hands the pile of money to Nick.

KAT
Count it. Six thousand even.

Nick doesn’t look at the money, just tucks it into his bag.

NICK
I trust you.

Kat almost lets it go, but then...

KAT
No, count it, anyway.

NICK
Why?

KAT
I’m compulsive and weird?

Nick humors her. Pulls out the stack of bills and counts it.

KAT (CONT’D)
Six thousand, right?

NICK
On the nose.
(beat)
I tell you what, because you’re so
cute, I’ll take care of our
incidentals.

KAT
How does it feel to get that much
money just for being you?

NICK
(wryly)
Great, with the occasional stabs of
shame. Now, listen, this covers
 the weekend, but as we discussed,
if you want to be intimate, we talk
money before anything happens.

KAT
That won’t be an issue, believe me.
I find the idea of sex for money
morally repugnant.
(realizing)
No offense.

NICK
It’s okay. Hell, I’ve never paid
for it. But please don’t feel like
you have to explain yourself to me.

Nick notices Kat’s anxiety, tries to settle her.

NICK
I really am sorry I couldn’t leave
earlier. I know you would have
loved a few hours to settle in
before the party.

Kat melts a little. That’s just what she was thinking. Kat steps into the
bathroom and starts getting ready for the party, filling the space as she
changes into her dress. Nick unpacks a bit and lays his suit and tie out on
the bed.

KAT (CONT’D)
I’ve gotta warn you, you know those
families where everyone’s out of
their minds but at the end of the
day, they’re family, so you love
them?
(off his nod)
Mine’s not like that.

KAT (CONT’D)
I love my dad. But since he’s my
stepdad, he’s technically not
family. He’s more like a hostage.

Kat emerges from the bathroom and looks at his tie, then down at her dress.
They are the exact same color. She picks up the tie.

KAT
(concerned)
Please tell me you’re not wearing
that tonight.

Her dress is indeed the exact same color as Nick’s tie.

KAT
It’s no big deal. Really. It just
looks like a tailor cut off a yard
of my dress and made your tie out
of it.
Nick doesn’t get it.

KAT (CONT’D)
Don’t get me wrong, matching’s
fine. It’s “matchy matchy” you’ve
got to watch out for.
(re: outfits)
This is matchy-matchy.

Nick is amused.

NICK
You think we look like we’re trying
too hard.

KAT
Exactly. I want us to look like we
fit, but not like we’re trying too
hard to look like we fit.
(beat)
It’s welcome cocktails, not prom.
With this level of matchy-matchy, we
should be drinking peach schnapps
under a bleacher somewhere.

Nick laughs at Kat. Then fixes her with an intense stare.

NICK
I’ll teach you a trick. If you
look people in the eye, they’ll
never even notice what you have on.

Kat, overwhelmed by his charisma, is mesmerized.

NICK (CONT’D)
What color are my shoes?

KAT
(dreamily)
You have feet?

Nick smiles sweetly and touches her cheek. Kat ducks back into the bathroom
to change into another dress, while Nick continues unpacking.

NICK
I understand how important this is
to you, but you’re a beautiful
woman and you’ve got everything in
the world going for you. I
couldn’t care less what you have
on.

Kat comes out modeling a black strapless.

KAT
Don’t patronize me.

NICK
You’re funny.
 KAT
Yeah, but I feel like crap. And if
you feel like crap, it’s way better
to look hot while you’re doing it.

He checks her out.

NICK
Mission accomplished.

KAT
Really?
(beat)
Don’t get too attached.

She goes back into the bathroom to change again, and expertly slides off the
second dress while simultaneously pulling another one on -- not an inch of
skin shows.

NICK (O.S.)
(through the door)
I bet you’re doing that girl thing,
where you get undressed without
showing any skin.

Kat looks around suspiciously.

KAT
No, I’m not.
How’d he know?

Kat emerges from the bathroom wearing the new dress. Nick
checks it out.

NICK
Mmm.

KAT
Mmm, nice dress? Or mmm--
(British accent)
Gorgeous, I was insane to let you
go!

NICK
Both.

Nick, amused by her antics, steps closer to the door.

NICK
You know, they say you can tell
everything you need to know about a
person from the way they act when
they’re naked.

KAT
(popping her head out)
I don’t do naked. My sister? She
does naked.
Kat ducks back into the bathroom. Kat starts doing a yoga breath of fire,
trying to relax.

Nick takes Kat’s hand and pulls her close.

NICK
You okay, hon?

Kat nods, clearly not okay. Nick smooths a piece of hair

behind her ear. There is a practiced intimacy to the way he
touches her and Kat is almost settled by it.

KAT
I’m not sure I can do this.

Nick moves towards Kat as if he’s going to kiss her, but then
he whispers in her ear.

NICK
You’re never going to be sure of
anything, but we still have to go
out there.

KAT
Let the suffering begin.

Nick stops Kat and faces her. He is quiet but intense.

NICK
The only one suffering here is you.
You need to stop worrying about
everyone else. You think you can
do that?

Kat takes a deep, calming breath.

KAT
No.

She turns and surveys the room, trying to calm down. But
then slowly her face begins to tense. Kat walks over to an old dollhouse.
Its rooms have been gutted, their mini furnishings replaced with a teenager’s
cassette-tape collection.

Kat pulls out Guns and Roses’ “Appetite for Destruction” and
opens it. There’s no tape inside, just some nicotine
patches. Nick watches as she opens one up and slaps it on.

NICK
You quitting?

KAT
I’m desperate to start but I don’t
have an addictive personality.
Except for approval. That, I can’t
get enough of.
Nick notices an ‘80s poster of two guys with guitars, all big hair and laser
light shows.

NICK
Who are they?

KAT
Graham Russell and Russell
Hitchcock.

Nick thinks about those names for a second, then his face
twists.

NICK
Air Supply?

Embarrassed, Kat hastily rips down the poster and stuffs it

in the closet.

KAT
My parents had a German exchange
student a few years back.... He
must have left it here.

Nick hides a smile as Kat ducks into the bathroom.

INT. KAT’S BATHROOM

Kat has left the door open a crack as she does her makeup. Unbeknownst to
her, Nick watches from the bed, enjoying the ritual.

KAT
(quietly)
Everyone knows their greatest hits
but some of their lesser-known
ballads are surprisingly poignant.

Inexplicably, Kat stands on her tiptoes as she looks into the

mirror. It’s a little thing, maybe the tiles are cold, but
it gives her an innocence that makes Nick smile.

KAT
What?

NICK
It’s cute.

KAT
What is?

NICK
You stand on your tiptoes.

KAT
I do?

Kat looks down, she never noticed before.

 NICK
Is it an old habit from ballet
class or a childhood spent walking
on eggshells?

She throws him a glance, impressed with the sharpness of his

mind.

KAT
I never took ballet.

She smiles and kicks the door closed with her foot.

KAT
Have you ever done anything like
this before?

NICK
A weekend?

KAT
A wedding.

Nick thinks about that. Kat wonders what’s taking him so

long.

NICK
No. Though strangely, I’ve done
quite a few funerals.

Kat makes a face.

NICK (CONT’D)
Not the way you’re thinking. The
women wanted me there for support.
You can understand that.

KAT
I think that’s disgusting.

Kat immediately backpedals.

KAT (CONT’D)
Not you. You’re not disgusting.
You’re lovely. Just the idea that
they’d bring an escort. I mean, a
stranger who, um, didn’t...who
never.... I mean, someone’s dead.

NICK
That’s right. Imagine facing it
alone.

Kat blanches.

KAT
Sorry. I’m a little nervous. I
never thought something like this
would happen to me.
 NICK
This happened to you?

KAT
Well, happen, in the sense that I
picked up the phone, tracked you
down, flew you here and gave you
six grand out of my 401K.

Nick laughs at her. Kat pulls something out of her purse.

KAT (CONT’D)
Can I ask you something?

Nick sees what she’s unfolding. It’s a crinkled New Yorker

article. The artsy photo shows the FACE OF A MAN, blurred
against a neon cityscape. The title: “Discretion Assured:
Diary of a Male Escort.”

NICK
How did you know that was me?

KAT
I have a friend at the magazine.

NICK
(sharply)
Your “friend” guaranteed my
anonymity.

KAT
If it makes you feel any better, to
get your number, I had to cough up
two round-trip tickets to Amsterdam
and a case of mini-Baileys.

Nick shakes his head at her and pulls off his shirt. Kat
instinctively looks away.

NICK
You can look. It’s part of the
package.

Kat can’t tell if he’s joking. She sneaks a look as Nick

disappears into the bathroom. Wow. Kat looks down at the
papers in her hand. She moves towards the bathroom but at
the last minute, shies away.

NICK (O.S.)
Would you grab my toothbrush?

KAT
Toothbrush, got it!

Kat grabs the toothbrush and rushes it to the bathroom. Without looking in
the bathroom, Kat hands him the toothbrush and hurries out, way too quickly.
Nick peeks out of the door. She’s gone. He shakes his head and closes the
door more. Suddenly, Kat reappears. She moves closer to the door.
 KAT
The part where you were a sexual
surrogate and then started to, um,
freelance. Is that really how it
happened?

Kat pretends to straighten things up as she moves even closer to sneak a

glance through the door.

NICK
The real story is that my mother
was a hippie. And a stripper. She
was insanely inappropriate with me.
She used to wash her lingerie in my
bathwater. While I was still in
the bath.

KAT
Oh, no.

NICK
Yeah. As an adult, I needed to find
some way to experience intimacy and
sex, but with rules that couldn’t be
violated.

Kat’s totally engrossed now. She opens the door a crack in disbelief.

KAT
Wow.

Nick pokes his head out.

NICK
Yeah.

Nick sees that Kat’s heartbroken for him, feels bad.

NICK (CONT’D)
I’m just screwing with you.

Kat throws a towel at him.

KAT
You shit!

NICK
I have a different story for every
woman who asks. I look at her and
figure out what she needs to hear
to feel okay about being with me.

KAT
And you thought I’d respond to the
hippie stripper with no boundaries?

NICK
Admit it. You were disturbed, but
ultimately moved.
Kat gives him a dirty look in the mirror, then examines the article again.

KAT
This part here. You say, and I
quote. “Each woman has the exact
love life she wants.”
(beat)
That seems like a pretty broad
generalization.

Nick opens the door and faces her, bare-chested. Kat covers her subtle jaw-
drop. Kat tries to pull it together. She looks down at the article, tapping
it indignantly--

KAT (CONT’D)
So...what was I...oh, yeah. Do you
honestly think that I want to be
single and miserable? That I want
to be obsessed with some asshole
who led me on for years then -- out
of the blue -- shattered my heart.

NICK
First of all, it’s never out of the
blue. And second of all--

Nick levels his gaze at her.

NICK (CONT’D)
Yes.

KAT
What?!

NICK
When you’re ready to let go, to be
unsingle and unmiserable, you will.
Until then....

Nick shrugs. He starts to put on the clothes he’s laid out.

KAT
(quietly)
Is it always women?

Nick looks at her like she’s crazy.

NICK
Are you asking me if I’m gay for
pay?

KAT
I guess so.

NICK
What do you think?

Nick confronts her. She takes him in.

 KAT
Got it.

NICK
I love that you’re asking
questions, but do you really want
to get into all of this?

KAT
This is awkward for me.
(beat)
Talking about it makes me feel
better.

Nick looks over at Kat, who gets quiet. She picks at nothing
on her dress.

NICK
Hey.

Kat looks at him.

NICK (CONT’D)
Don’t stop asking questions, okay?

KAT
Okay.

Kat smiles, but stays quiet. Then--

KAT (CONT’D)
Do you pay taxes?