TITLE: The Centurion GENRE: Action

DATE: January 25, 2010 WRITER: Michael A. Anabui

LENGTH: 113 Pages CIRCA: Roman Era

LOGLINE
A legionnaire defends Rome, under rule by an undeserving leader.

RATINGS
(0 = poor / 10 = outstanding)

CONCEPT: 10 DIALOGUE: 10

CHARACTERS: 8 CONFLICT: 9

PLOT: 8 PACING: 9

STRUCTURE: 9 CLARITY: 8

OVERALL SCORE: 8.9

RECOMMEND X_
CONSIDER __
PASS__

SYNOPSIS

While shopping at the market, Claudia is killed by an out-of-

control horse that tramples over her. Her son, Augustus, is
devastated upon hearing the news, and visits the site of her
death. There, he meets a girl named Helena, who gives him a
white rose. Elsewhere, Claudia's husband, Tiberius, fights with
five thousand Roman legionnaire soldiers against their opponent,
the Germania. While the Romans are victorious, Tiberius is
injured, and his brother, Gaius, helps him back to town, unaware
of the tragic news that awaits.
Flavia, Gaius' wife, greets him with love upon the legionnaire's
return to Rome, while other wives weep, unable to see their
husbands return alive. Flavia tells Tiberius about his wife's
death, and both husband and son morn for Claudia. As he visits
his wife's grave, Tiberius passes away. Augustus goes to live
with Gaius, Flavia and their son, Titus

At Tiberius' funeral, General Marcus tells Britannicus, the son

of Roman Emperor Claudius, that one day, it will be his turn to
rule, and when he does, he'll need a mighty Centurion like
Tiberius, who was loved by every legionnaire. Claudius' wife,
Julia, praises Britannicus upon eavesdropping on their
conversation, but Marcus warns Britannicus to be weary of her
falsehood.

At dinner, Claudius and Britannicus applaud Tiberius' bravery,

while Julia belittles Tiberius' prowess, calling him easily
replaceable. Nero, her son, agrees with her. After dinner,
General Arculis, who is having an affair with Julia, plots with
her to have Claudius killed, and to frame Marcus and Britannicus
for the murder, so that Nero can become Emperor instead of
Britannicus, whom she'll be able to manipulate. Julia then
approaches her husband and feeds him lies, telling Claudius that
Marcus plans to betray him, making the Emperor question why the
General is closer to Britannicus than him. She then suggests
naming a successor to his throne immediately.

Arculis pays three men to sneak into Claudius' home and kill
him. He tells them, if they are caught, to blame General
Marcus, making the attempt on the Emperor's life look like
Britannicus is in a hurry to inherit the throne. The murder
attempt is unsuccessful, and Claudius offers to pay the would-be
murderers one hundred times the amount they were paid to reveal
their leader. The men blame General Marcus, and Claudius gives
orders for Marcus and his family to be killed.

Gaius questions why Marcus would have Claudius killed, and knows
something is not right. Claudius makes Gaius his head of
security, trusting only him. The Emperor then names his nephew,
Nero, his successor instead of his own son, Britannicus, which
shocks Gaius.

As the crowd watches a gladiator fight, Nero turns away every

time someone bleeds. Nero tells Claudius that the people of
Rome would be much better entertained with other forms of
amusement, such as music performances and poetry recitals. When
the show is over, Claudius publicly names Nero his successor,
much to the heartbreak of Britannicus. When they two are alone,
Britannicus lashes out at Claudius for naming Nero his successor
instead of his own son. Claudius confesses that he was
convinced Britannicus and Marcus were trying to have him killed,
which Britannicus denies. Britannicus calls himself the
laughing stock of Rome after doing everything for his father,
with no reward.

Augustus and Helena, now young adults, go on a date. When they

depart, she gives him a white rose. Walking away, she is almost
raped by two thugs. Augustus hears her screams and comes to
save her, fending them off.

Julia catches Arculis flirting with another girl, and the two
have an argument. Later, Arculis poisons Claudius with
mushrooms, which kills the Emperor. Arculis then kills himself
with his own sword.

Gaius voices his concern over Rome's fate now that Claudius is
dead, and therefore, now that Nero is Emperor instead of
Britannicus. When Augustus asks about his motivation to become
a legionnaire, Gaius reveals that Augustus' grandfather was a
legionnaire, so he and Tiberius followed his footsteps. Gaius
then decides to train Augustus, Titus and their friends to
become legionnaires, warning them that the training will be
painful, but worth the preparation.

The training begins, and Augustus and the boys become better,
stronger and smarter with each passing day. Helena watches on
and gives Augustus another white rose. Amulius, one of Augustus'
friends and fellow legionnaires in training, tries to romance
Helena, who tells him she's not interested in him. He leaves
rejected.

Julia tells Octavia, who is the wife of Nero and daughter to

Claudius, that she is not fit to be the wife of an Emperor.
Octavia tells her that she knows Julia had something to do with
her father's death.

Amulius tells Nero that he wants Helena, but that she wants
Augustus, not him. Nero tells Amulius to take her by force,
with no regard for her own desires. Nero reveals he is sleeping
with Sabina, the wife of one of his friends, and plans on
divorcing his wife, Octavia, so that he may marry Sabina.

Helena and Augustus get married before his first battle as a

legionnaire against the Parthia. They are victorious, and upon
their return, Helena tells Augustus that she is pregnant, which
Amulius frowns on. She warns Augustus about Amulius, and
reveals how he tried to hit on her. Meanwhile, Amulius tells
Nero that he won't return to battle as a legionnaire, instead,
choosing a position in Rome's senate. Nero tells Amulius he
will put Augustus in battle with minimal defense, so that he
will be killed in action. That way, Amulius can comfort his
grieving widow. Meanwhile, Helena gives birth to baby Marcus.

Nero rants about the how the Christian population is growing in

Rome, and how they are converting everyone from praying to the
Roman gods to Jesus. Augustus hears Christians preach the word
of Jesus, but pays it no mind. Meanwhile, Helena shops at the
market with her son, hears the words of preaching Christians,
and decides to convert.

Augustus walks around and sees all the dead Christians who were
ordered to be crucified by Nero. He asks Helena and his
Christian legionnaires what he must do to become Christian
himself. They educate and baptize him. Augustus becomes born-
again to end the story.
 Characters

Nero: Son of Julia, nephew and adopted son to Claudius.

Nero has no regard for the sanctity of marriage, and
chooses power over family loyalty. He will stop at nothing
to get what he wants, and will use his power as Emperor to
maintain that what he unjustly inherits. Nero doesn't see
that his mother gave him the position he was appointed to.
Both he and his mother rule with paranoia.
Tiberius: Father to Augustus, brother to Gaius, husband to
Claudia. A second-generation legionnaire leader with a
sense of humor.
Gaius: Brother to Augustus, husband to Flavia, father to
Titus and uncle to Augustus. He teaches his son and nephew
how to become a legionnaire, defends different family
members in several key scenes, and is the first to suspect
something is afoot upon Nero's leadership reign.
Britannicus: Son of Claudius, he hopes to one day become
Emperor, and is devastated when his father appoints Nero,
his step-brother, instead.

What Works

Nation of violence: All of the battles in this screenplay

are full of gore and not shy of blood in any way - as a
Roman battle story should be. The screenplay doesn't
allude to pain, and isn’t for the faint of heart. Even the
non-battle scenes, such as the crucifixion of the Christian
believers, or the fatal ends of Nero's family, are given
deadly outcomes. The descriptions are written creatively,
and don't come across as gratuitous violence.
Training for battle: Gaius’ training sessions with the
young men who will become future legionnaires are written
as militant, but also with a touch of comedy. Gaius is
shown as a leader with limits, but patient, and human.
There is one particular moment where Gaius makes a penis-
sword analogy, and it goes hilariously wrong. It’s a
moment that will give the intensity of this action-heavy
story a much-needed laughter break.
A rose by any other name: From the day they meet as
children, Helena gives Augustus a white rose at all the
defining moments in their lives - from his mother's death,
to his training days, and the white rose is even
reciprocated by Augustus while he's in battle. The rose is
symbolic of their love amidst the strife in their
environment. Surprisingly, no white rose is apparent in
the final scene where Augustus converts to Christianity.

What Needs Work

Caligula: The former monarch is referenced several times in

this story, as he is the older brother of Julia. While the
story isn't about him, either he should be written out
completely, or his history between certain characters
should be expanded on. At one point, Britannicus calls
Nero the son of a murderer and a cheat. Is the audience to
believe Caligula is the father he's referencing? This is
not as clear as it could be.

Nero's suicide: While Nero's guards do battle with Augustus

and his legionnaires, Nero is chased by...guards. At this
point, it is written that Nero still has command as
Emperor, so why is he running away from his own men?
Clarification would be beneficial.

The return of Britannicus: The son of Claudius was given so

much time to grow as a character in the first act, and when
he re-appears in the third, it is not with a bang, but a
whimper. He is seen at the dinner table amongst family,
takes a sip from his drink, then drops dead. Not the
strongest return for a character the audience has invested
interest in.

Antius: He was given orders by Nero to kill several

characters, including an innocent handyman, as well as
Nero's mother. When we last see him, he murders Amulius.
What is his fate?
 Final Analysis

“The Centurion” is a fantastic story with a mix of Shakespearian

themes, Roman and Christian history, dramatic romance, jealous
characters, comedic moments and a heavy dose of action. It has
all the right elements of a perfect screenplay.

Each key character is given just the right amount of attention –

everyone is utilized and plays their role. There are no
dangling plot points. "The Centurion" is a film adaptation
waiting to happen, a true gem. RECOMMENDED!