Honouring The

Dishonourable:
The Truth About
Our Parents

Sarah Al-Sheikhli













Published in 2021 by Sarah Al-Sheikhli







Text © Sarah Al-Sheikhli

Cover Design © Azizur Rahim, 2021




ISBN 978-0-0473-61197-2


All rights reserved. No part of this publication may
be reproduced or transmitted in any format or by
any means, electronic, mechanical, or digital,
including photocopying, recording, storage in any
retrieval system, or otherwise without prior
written permission of the publisher.


National Library of New Zealand Cataloguing-in-
Publication Data




 Dedication

To the wonderful antinatalists on social media who

continued to educate, enlighten, encourage, motivate,
and support me in my desire to spread antinatalism
and promote it as a philosophy focused on children’s
rights advocacy. I have never found any other
community on the internet or in real life where I have
felt like I belonged. Thank you for providing me with
validation in a world where validation is rare and
with a safe space where I can truly be myself. I will
always be eternally grateful to you

xoxoxo
Table of Contents
Introduction ............................................................ i
Part 1 – Understanding The Problem ................. - 1 -
Understanding Consent................................ - 1 -
An Introduction to Natural and Human Rights -
1-
How people are indoctrinated into the cult of
progeny ...................................................... - 36 -
How We Psychologically Manipulate People
Into Enslavement ....................................... - 53 -
Part 2 – A Deeper Lens ..................................... - 71 -
Acknowledging Facts For What They Are . - 71 -
Acknowledging Futility .............................. - 86 -
Narcissism Masked As Altruism ................ - 99 -
Why They Deserve No Glory ................... - 116 -
Part 3 – Moving Forward ............................... - 130 -
No Obligations, But Their Obligations .... - 130 -
Why You Should Break The Cycle .......... - 139 -
Alternative Pathways Towards Finding
Meaning In Life........................................ - 165 -
How To Be A Proactive Part Of The Solution ..-
177 -
Notes ............................................................. - 184 -
 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

Introduction
When I was a little girl, I had very
overbearing helicopter parents who taught
me the importance of obeying and glorifying
them. According to them, I would only enter
heaven if my parents were pleased with me.
Otherwise, God Almighty would punish me,
and I would be subjected to burn in eternal
hellfire. Growing up in an Islamic
household, my parents would often quote
verses from the Holy Quran to justify this,
such as:

Chapter 6:151 Surah Al-An’am

‘Allah commands us not even to

say “Uff!” to our parents, which is a
minor word of annoyance. Anything
worse than that is prohibited. Our
respect for our parents should be
impeccable in every circumstance, to
the best of our ability.’

You would also often hear the typical

Hadiths (traditions)

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

Imam Nasai (rahimahullah) has

authentically recorded a Hadith, in which a
Rasulullah (sallallahu’alayhi wasallam) told
a Sahabi (radiyallahu’anhu):

‘Stick to her [his mother] for indeed

Jannah lies beneath her feet.’

(Sunan Nasai, Hadith: 3104, Musnad

Ahmad, vol.3 pg. 429, Mushkilul Athar,
Hadith: 2132, Declared authentic -sahih- by
Imams Hakim and Dhahabi (rahimahullah);
Mustdarak Hakim, vol.4 pg.151. Also see
Al-Maqasidul Hasanah, Hadith: 373 &
Hukmul ‘Amal bil Hadithid Da’if of Shaykh
‘Awwamah, pg.97 & 106)

As a child, I used to be terrified of my

parent's wrath until I got a little older, and I
began to notice some of their flaws, and I
started to rebel against them. My parents
would tell me quite a few stories about how
their parents sacrificed everything for them
to be where they are now and how they are
forever indebted to them. One of my
favourite stories’ from my father’s more
humble side of the family was when my

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 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

grandfather got accepted into medical

school, and his poor parents, who lived near
marshlands, gave him all the money they
had to put him into university. One day their
house collapsed, and my grandfather
dropped out of medical school; and he
returned home with all their money and
decided to help them rebuild their home
while he studied nursing.
In my culture, we as children are
expected to sacrifice everything for our
parents just as they supposedly did for us.
Many children in the Middle East are raised
to have very poor boundaries. This leaves
them at risk of being vulnerable to
exploitation, manipulation, and
subservience to their parents (and their
future partners). It is not uncommon for
well-off families to ask their children for
money. Financial abuse is a common
control tactic to keep children enslaved to
their parents. Many parents believe it is
their divinely ordained duty to infantilise
and micromanage every aspect of their
children’s lives, from who their friends are,
what hobbies they have, what they study,

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

their career pathway, their future spouse,

and how and where they spend their money.
Throughout Asia, the concept of filial
piety in Confucian philosophy is considered
the greatest of all virtues that should be
demonstrated to both the living and the
deceased. Filial piety is concerned with
respect, obedience, ancestor worship, and
bestowing honour and respect to your
parents. It is not uncommon for Asian
parents to live with their adult children;
children faithfully handle their parents'
finances, children support their parents
financially and even honour deceased
parents honouring their parents' legacy and
remembrance.
Chinese culture celebrates the Hungry
Ghost Festival when people leave behind
food and drinks for their parents and other
deceased relatives, believing their departed
relatives will come back and visit them.
Furthermore, in earlier days in China,
children who commit crimes against a parent
would be punished far more harshly by law
than if the parent against the child
perpetrated the same crime.

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 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

According to an African Parenting blog,

African parenting is also centred around
self-sacrifice, extended family support,
staying married for the sake of the children,
obedience, and the concept derived from
their widely known Igbo and Yoruba
proverb ‘It takes a village to raise a child,
and a community to keep the parents sane.’

Christianity teaches us the importance of

honouring our parents because that helps us
in our duty to honour God and channel our
hearts to honour Him.

In Exodus 20:12, God says

“Honor your father and your mother,

that your days may be long in the land that
the Lord your God is giving you.”

God says in Deuteronomy 5:16

“‘Honor your father and your mother,
as the LORD your God commanded you,
that your days may be long, and that it may
go well with you in the land that
the LORD your God is giving you.

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

And in Deuteronomy 21:18-21

“If a man has a stubborn and rebellious

son who will not obey the voice of his
father or the voice of his mother, and,
though they discipline him, will not listen
to them, then his father and his mother
shall take hold of him and bring him out to
the elders of his city at the gate of the place
where he lives, and they shall say to the
elders of his city, ‘This our son is stubborn
and rebellious; he will not obey our voice;
he is a glutton and a drunkard.’ Then all
the men of the city shall stone him to death
with stones. So you shall purge the evil
from your midst, and all Israel shall hear
and fear.

In Leviticus 20:9, God says

“For anyone who curses his father or

his mother shall surely be put to death; he
has cursed his father or his mother; his
blood is upon him.”

In Hinduism, parents are above God in

status. The Mother is the 1st God, the Father

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 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

the 2nd God, the teacher is the 3rd God, and

after that, children must devote themselves
to the God which parents worship as the
fourth God. Having a family, marrying, and
becoming a parent is the second ashrama
seen by some Hindus as a duty. Many
Hindus believe wisdom should be shared
with grandchildren by guiding them through
rites of passage in the third ashrama. The
ashrama system is one facet of the Dharma
concept of spiritual hermitage in Indian
religions.
Similarly, the concepts of Mother’s Day
and Father’s Day are rooted in ancient
Pagan festivals. Mother’s Day honour is to
honour Cybele or Rhea from Greece, the
Mother of all Gods. Mother’s Day was
adopted in the United States on May 10th,
1953. Father’s Day is also rooted in Pagan
worship of the Sky Father of the universe
from Egyptians to Babylonians. Father’s
Day was adopted as a holiday in the United
States on the 3rd Sunday of June 1972 after
unofficially declaring it a complementary
holiday to Mother’s Day in 1910.
Antinatalism is a philosophy that assigns
a negative value to birth. Over the past

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

decade, antinatalism has been receiving

more coverage in mainstream media, leading
to its increased growth and popularity.
Antinatalism goes as far back as Ancient
Greek philosophy and Jewish Literature,
such as the Book of Ecclesiastes, and it was
commonly practiced among the Gnostics.
According to Gnosticism, the world is
divided by two rulers of two different
worlds; the first is the demiurge representing
the lower world associated with matter,
flesh, time, and an imperfect, ephemeral
world. The other world is of God that is
ascended associated with soul, perfection,
timelessness, and it is eternal and not part of
the physical. The Gnostics were antinatalists
and rejected procreation because they
believed it shackles the higher self. They
also believed the only way for humanity to
escape the cycle of reincarnation is if we all
collectively refrain from procreation.
Many problems plague humanity
including, overpopulation, rapid loss of
biodiversity, mass consumption of natural
resources, water scarcity, increased
catastrophes such as flooding, droughts, and
other natural disasters in addition to the cost

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 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

of raising children, lack of economic

opportunities, rapid inflation, housing
shortages, homelessness, political unrest,
increased crime, loss of civil rights and
increases in mental health crises on a global
scale.
The main objective of this book is to
dispel the myth that life is a gift, and we
should therefore be obligated to honour our
parents. An alternative perspective is
presented to readers on parenthood and how
it narcissistically weaponises morality to
enslave and indoctrinate people into
parenthood. The book also touches on
natural and human rights, consent, futility
with an alternative pathway towards finding
meaning in life.
I am a journalist by trade. Currently, I am
working towards my qualifications to shift
the direction of my career towards the
construction industry. I have worked in
mental health and disability sectors for
several years. For the past four years, I have
been studying antinatalism and actively
engaging in dialogues on various social
media forums and in real life. I accidentally
stumbled on antinatalism in various forms

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

before reaching where I am now. While

studying journalism, I minored in
environmental sciences, which accidentally
led me to the voluntary human extinction
movement (VHEMT). At the time, I thought
the idea was ridiculous.
A few years later, when I was becoming
irreligious, a friend introduced me to the
work of comparative mythologist John
Lamb Lash, who wrote ‘Not in His Image,
and in one of his interviews, he explains
why Gnostics opposed procreation which at
the time I didn’t quite understand. My
mother had mentioned some antinatalist
Arabic poetry by Abū al-ʿAlāʾ al-Maʿarrī ,
and I remember finding it very appealing. It
was not abnormal for me to have these
dialogues with my family because we are
generally quite open and pessimistic about
life.
I accidentally found antinatalism while
watching vegan drama videos where one
pronatalist vegan YouTuber was arguing
against many childfree and antinatalist
vegan YouTubers. In her video, she posted
some screenshots from the r/antinatalism
subreddit. I felt immediately drawn to those

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 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

screenshots like nothing I had ever seen in

my life. A year later, I began following and
engaging with antinatalists on Twitter, and
here I am now, a few years later, writing this
book for the movement I have dedicated to
them.
The information in this book will help
people understand the sociocultural and
religious influences behind the glorification
and glamourisation of parenthood. It
explores the need for a massive
consciousness shift in our collective psyches
towards intellectual honesty that
acknowledges existence's harsh and
unpleasant reality. There needs to be a mass
campaign to rebrand natalism and shift
towards a child rights advocacy movement
that focuses on prevention rather than cure.
Do not wait too long to read this book. I
recommend sharing this book with people of
all ages, especially young adults in their late
teens and early 20s, to encourage them to
think twice before procreating to consider
adoption or fostering as alternatives if they
are keen to start a family. Similarly, women
and men who are increasingly pressured to
have children should read this book,

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

especially women who feel pressured to

have children quickly due to their biological
clocks.

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 Part 1 – Understanding The Problem

CHAPTER ONE

Understanding Consent

“Of my conception, I know only what

you know of yours. It occurred in
darkness, and I was unconsenting...
By some bleak alchemy, what had
been mere unbeing becomes death
when life is mingled with it.”

― Marilynne Robinson
 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

According to the Merriam-Webster

dictionary, consent is defined as “to give
assent or approval.” Traditionally
acknowledged in a legal context concerning
rape, the concept of consent is found across
all areas of our life and the general rule is
universally the same. Consent is an ongoing
process of boundaries between two or more
parties that is communicated through open
dialogue with clarity to ensure there is an
assurance of consent to acknowledge,
understand and respect other people’s
boundaries. Consent cannot be given by
individuals who are underage, asleep,
unconscious, or under the influence of
substances such as drugs and alcohol. In the
context of coming into this realm of
existence, unequal power dynamics between
adults and their children will always be an
inevitable part of procreation. Like rape,
consent cannot be considered freely under
pressure, intimidation, or threat. Consent is
about openness, communication,
transparency, reciprocity, and acting in good
faith.

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 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

Consent in Medical Ethics

Most medical codes of ethics and

physicians need to obtain free and informed
consent before attempting any serious
medical procedure. Thus, the concept of
consent is a legal requirement and a
formality and a fundamental component of
morality. In rare cases, proxy consent
enables medical professionals to proceed on
behalf of the incompetent subject. If we
examine consent as a general concept, there
are many components taken into
consideration, particularly about a legal
issue. Depending on the circumstances,
there is usually a minimum age for giving
consent, and the consumer needs to have the
capacity to understand the information
relevant to making a fully informed
decision. If someone is underage or cannot
make a fully informed decision, the guardian
usually does this, who will act on their
behalf.

10 Basic Rights in Healthcare

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

Furthermore, if we examine consumer

rights in the context of health and disability
services (adapted based on human rights
from the United Nations), consumers of
health and disability services have 10 rights
when receiving services. These rights are
outlined as follows:

§ Right #1 – The right to be

treated with respect
§ Right #2 – The right to
freedom from discrimination,
coercion, harassment, and
exploitation
§ Right #3 – The right to
dignity and independence
§ Right #4 – The right to
services of an appropriate standard
§ Right #5 – The right to
effective communication
§ Right #6 – The right to be
fully informed
§ Right #7 – The right to make
an informed choice and give consent
§ Right #8 – The right to
support

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 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

§ Right #9 – The right in

respect of teaching or research
§ Right #10 – The right to
complain

Incapacity to Make Decisions

The concept of consent is a fundamental

moral principle that is one of the main focal
points of antinatalism. To quote my friend
Antoine Sugar: “The essence and core
foundation of antinatalism is the golden
rule. Do unto others as you would have them
do unto you.” In short, children cannot give
consent to be born, and parents cannot seek
their children's consent before they bring
them into this world. To try and justify and
understand antinatalism, we need to apply
the basic concepts of consent, empathy,
uncertainty (gambling with someone else’s
life in a genetic lottery against their consent)
human rights and (in)capacity to make
decisions. We also need to consider that our
brains do not fully develop until they reach
the age of 25. All prospective parents who
intend to have biological children someday

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

need to ask themselves the following

questions:
Are they respecting their children when
they force them into existence without their
consent? Are their children born free and
live in a world free of discrimination,
coercion, harassment, and exploitation? Is
forcing someone into existence not coercion,
harassment, and exploitation, and do we
justify this by discriminating against
children based on their age and vulnerability
to exploitation? Was forcing a child into
existence against their consent a dignifying
experience for the child? Have they
effectively communicated with their child
regarding the existence, what it means and
what it entails? Has their child been given an
opportunity to make an informed decision
that allows them to give consent? Has their
child been supported unbiasedly to make
this decision? Does their child have the right
to complain?

Empathy

Empathy is defined as an “individual’s

objective and insightful awareness of the

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 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

feelings and behaviour of another person

that includes concern for others welfare and
altruistic concern.” Most people are capable
of cognitive empathy, which is primarily
about considering other people’s
perspectives by imagining what it is like to
be in their shoes to try and understand their
feelings. This involves examining life
objectively and making a conscious decision
to acknowledge life for what it is. This
means acknowledging the good, bad, and
ugly parts of life before deciding to gamble
with somebody else’s life to procreate.
Natalists who choose to have biological
children lack empathy towards their
children. In her article titled “Signs of
people who lack empathy and examples of
their behavior in everyday life,” Lauren
Edwards-Fowle explains that those who lack
empathy have a strong set of irrefutable
personal beliefs, where they find it
extremely difficult to accept any situation
they are in, they might be wrong. They often
lack the emotional maturity to reconsider
their ideas or understand how they might be
wrong. We often notice natalists feel
adamant in defending their choice to have

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

children and their children's right to be born.

Secondly, an absence of empathy comes
with a stronger sense of self that is very
egotistical, as they prioritise themselves in
every situation with their inflated ego. We
see this same parallel with natalists who
prioritise having a biological child to meet
their own selfish needs rather than
considering adoption or fostering. Natalists
also tend to have a sense of entitlement
which is known as conversational
narcissism, and we also see this in people
who lack empathy. We will further examine
the connection between procreation and
narcissism in later chapters.

Generic Life Scripting

Are you able to look at yourself straight

in the eye and tell yourself life is good and
you are happy? Most people follow the
generic life scripts where they go to school,
find a career, get married, have children,
work until they are 65, retire and then die.
Does that life script honestly give you
infinite joy and happiness like society tells
you it does? Would you have chosen to exist

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 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

in a world or chosen to never have come

into this world? It is important to spend
some time doing some deep soul searching
to cultivate self-awareness. It will always be
difficult to do this if you decide to have
children.
Psychotherapist Roma Sharma explains
that life scripts are sets of childhood
decisions made unconsciously in response to
parent messages about self, others, and the
world. The script is a life plan based on
decisions made at any development stage,
and we use psychological games to reinforce
our scripts. The concept of natalism has
been deeply rooted in our subconscious
programming from a very young age.
Children are given dolls to play with, and
fairy tales program us to desire children. In
our most formative years, we have “the
purpose of life is to procreate” deeply
engrained in our psyches, never considering
whether it is an ethical choice.

Uncertainty

Another key component to examine in

life is the concept of uncertainty. Our genes

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

that create us are purely brought together in

randomness that is essentially gambling in a
genetic lottery. Do you think it is fair to
gamble with someone else’s life knowing
the only thing in life you can guarantee them
is death and mostly suffering, with the result
being nothingness? The best way to
understand this is to imagine somebody
spinning a wheel of (mis)fortune or playing
a game of blackjack, and every outcome of
these games determines your life.

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 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

In his article “Antinatalism and the

Consent Argument,” blogger Sam Woolfe
references an article published in a
philosophy journal where the authors state,
“The fact prospective parents cannot gain
the consent of those they plan to bring into
existence doesn’t magically mean it’s OK.
Quite the opposite – if you can’t get the
consent of the person you’re going to
significantly affect by your action, then the
default position is that you don’t do
whatever it is that’s going to affect them.”

To quote my friend Antoine Sugar

“Imposing one’s will on somebody else
without their consent is criminal. Every
crime is imposing one’s will on another
without their consent. Theft is taking one’s
property without their consent; rape is
taking one’s body without their consent, and
murder is taking a life without consent, and
these all go hand in hand with procreation.”

A Ponzi Scheme

According to Investopedia, a Ponzi

scheme is defined as a fraudulent scam

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

promising high rates of return and little risk

to investors. A Ponzi scheme is similar to a
pyramid scheme in that both are based on
using new investors' funds (children) to pay
back the earlier backers (government and
pensioners). Both Ponzi schemes and
pyramid schemes eventually bottom out
when the flood of new investors dries up,
and there isn’t enough money to go around.
At that point, the scheme unravels.

Life is essentially based on a Ponzi

scheme where as soon as a name is assigned
to a child at birth and a birth certificate is
issued, an automatic agreement is made
between your parents and the state on your
behalf. The state can also legally use your
assets as collateral damage in the event of a
collapse. Newer generations and their
parents are promised the world a wonderful
future ahead only to experience hardship,
pain, and suffering in return for their
“investment.” The world we live in is often
far worse off than what is presented. We are
often fooled with many illusions that lead us
to overestimate what we expect from the
future, but nothing can be further from the

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 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

truth. The best example of this is millennials

being promised a future similar to that of
baby boomers where they can afford to work
part-time, study, and still afford to buy real
estate; nowadays you see most millennials
are heavily in debt, forced to work low-wage
jobs to pay off their student loans and
homeownership has become a dream far
from reality unless they inherit property or
receive financial help from their parents.
Therefore, it is important to examine these
generations' current situations and what
other major challenges future generations
will face. One must remember and keep in
mind, if one were to make such an
agreement that concerns somebody else’s
safety, welfare, or financial affairs, they
would be liable for a lawsuit and held
accountable by the justice system. Both
parties essentially exploit the fact children
cannot decide whether they consent to the
existence, including all the terms and
conditions that come with life, and even if
they do not, there is no safe or easy way out
of it.
We explored consent as a generic concept
in this chapter, using rape as an example.

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

We briefly touched on the medical code of

ethics and how this relates to the concept of
consent and the 10 basic healthcare rights
that children are not given when they come
into existence. We further expand on this by
examining their incapacity to make
decisions and the role of empathy
concerning matters relating to consent. Life
scripts and uncertainty in the genetic lottery
are briefly examined. The chapter concludes
that children’s lives are essentially an
unsolicited agreement between parents on
behalf of their children (who cannot make
decisions) with the state. The next chapter
will expand on natural and human rights and
how this relates to antinatalism.

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 CHAPTER TWO

An Introduction to Natural and Human

Rights

“A premature death does not only rob

one of the countless instances where
one would have experienced pleasure,
but it also saves one from the
innumerable instances where one
would have experienced pain.”

― Mokokoma Mokhonoana
 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

What are Rights?

According to the legal dictionary, “rights

are defined as a collection of entitlements
which a person may have and are protected
by the government and the courts, or under a
contractual agreement.”

Natural Rights

Natural law fulfils its purpose naturally

and exists independently of legislation that
inspired the concept of human rights that
promote fulfilling yourself, protecting life,
physical integrity, rights of association as
spiritual beings, and freedom of conscience.
Natural law acknowledges the law of
fulfilling oneself due to nature. Compared to
other organisms, humans have certain
freedoms that make them responsible for
their self-fulfilment. Natural law relates to
what is good or bad for human nature based
on what we know is inherently part of
human nature. The main components of
natural law are human desire to preserve
existence, transmit life, be part of society to

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 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

fulfil their social needs, and know the truth

about our existence.
The concept of natural law originated
from ancient Greece from the Antiphon of
Athens. Socrates and Plato explored this
concept, and later on, Aristotle developed
some foundations related to natural law.
During the Age of Enlightenment, Thomas
Hobbes formulated a theory on natural rights
adopting Aristotle’s position on equality
between humans. He also believed that
natural law challenges injustice and allows
one to make claims against the state. Jean-
Jacques Rousseau adopted many of these
ideas and expanded on them. In his writing
titled “The Social Contract,” Rousseau
believes “man believes he is born free and
yet everywhere he is in chains. He thinks he
is the master of others and remains a greater
slave than they are.”
One could argue that antinatalism goes
against human nature's very essence and
core. When humans reach a certain level of
consciousness, their intelligence begins to
conflict with their desire to procreate
because their psyche has evolved to a stage
where they recognise the suffering in life far

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

outweighs the positive experiences life has

to offer. Confronting the inevitable futility
of life is the core of pointlessness and
meaninglessness of existence. Contrarily,
things which frustrate humanity are bad such
as solitude, illness, and death. From this, we
derive morality because it is part and parcel
of human nature, and it is what creates
natural law. Over time, there becomes an
evolution in our morals, and we begin to ask
the question, is fulfilling your needs at
somebody else’s expense, knowing the
magnitude of suffering they will endure is
actually ethical or even worth it?

Human Rights

Human rights are universal standards

designed to recognise and protect the dignity
of all human beings. They help govern
individual relationships in society and
peoples’ relationships with the state, and the
state's obligations towards them that are
protected by international law. Human rights
law obliges governments from doing some
things and prevents them from doing others.

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 Honouring The Dishonourable:
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30 articles of human rights are not

considered absolute rights but constituent
rights for the greater good. Human rights
come from the state, and they constantly
change. Compared to natural law, the latter
does not come from the government, but
these rights are safeguarded politically to
ensure people can exercise them.
There are 4 rights in the United Nations
Declaration of Human Rights that
discriminate against children somehow.

“Article 1: All
human beings are born
free and equal in
dignity and rights. They
are endowed with
reason and conscience
and should act towards
one another in a spirit
of brotherhood.”

It is hard to apply this to children’s

relationship with their parents and the state
because of the unbalanced power dynamics.
Children cannot truly be considered free if
they are property of the state and are forced

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to go to school to be indoctrinated to work a

9-5 job until retirement age before they die.
As mentioned in the previous chapter, life is
a Ponzi scheme, and children are signed off
as state property as soon as they are born.

“Article 2: Everyone
is entitled to all the
rights and freedoms set
forth in this
Declaration without
discrimination of any
kind, such as race,
colour, sex, language,
religion, political or
other opinions, national
or social origin,
property, birth or other
status.”

Children are discriminated against based

on their age, vulnerability, inability to make
sound decisions, and dependency on their
guardians and the state. If children question
authority, they are silenced, reprimanded,
and humiliated by adults. The power
dynamic is a hindrance that restricts the

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rights and freedoms of children to decide not

to be born or to want to take a lawsuit
against their parents and be taken seriously
because of their age. Decisions are usually
made by their guardians, and children are
oblivious to reality, and the state takes
advantage of the fact they are not fully
informed about their situation.

“Article 4: No one
shall be held in slavery
or servitude, and the
slave trade shall be
prohibited in all their
forms.”

Many farmers in agrarian societies still

procreate and treat their children as
investments who will later work on their
family farms. Child labour is still common
in sweatshops, factories and one could
argue, children are trained to be enslaved by
society to safeguard the status quo and
replace the elderly generations against their
will and consent.

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

“Article 16: Part 1:

Men and women of full
age, without any
limitation due to race,
nationality or religion,
have the right to marry
and found a family.”

The right to found a family, namely if the

family is made up of biological children,
will always be at the expense of the children
unless those children are fostered or
adopted. The right to have a family should
not necessarily be a right, but rather an
option if people would like to proceed in
that pathway or direction or not. Ideally,
fostering and adoption should be prioritised
and incentivised over having biological
children.

“Article 25: Part 2:

Motherhood and
childhood are entitled
to special care and
assistance. All children,
whether born in or out
of wedlock, shall enjoy

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the same social

protection.”

You can provide children with special

care and assistance, but there is no way to
fully protect children from harm unless they
are not born into this world. We can have
laws to safeguard their welfare, vulnerability
from exploitation by adults, but there is no
guarantee they will be safe. Life provides no
safety net or insurance policies to protect
children from trauma, unexpected tragedies,
or unfortunate accidents. The concrete
jungle is still a jungle regardless of modern
civilisation or technological advancement.

Children’s Rights

According to the United Nations,

children and young people have general
human rights as adults. The UN claims
children are neither property of their parents
nor objects of charity. The convention
claims to recognise children as individuals
and offer children a vision with rights and
responsibilities that align with his or her
developmental stage.

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

The UN acknowledges children need to

rely on adults for nurture and guidance to
grow towards independence, and if parents
are unable to meet those needs, the
responsibility will fall onto the state to
provide for them. Children’s views must be
heard and considered in the political
process, and often these things do not
happen because children have no filters, and
adults feel threatened by their
inquisitiveness and skepticism, so they are
quick to silence children to maintain
children the status quo. The UN also
emphasises the importance of children
developing healthily is essential to the well-
being of any society and the cost of society
failing children will have long term
ramifications.
While these may be true, and we see this
in the wise African proverb, “A child that is
not embraced by the village will burn it
down to feel its warmth.” Child dependency
on adults is often exploited to serve various
agendas. For instance, many people choose
to have children out of fear of being
abandoned by their spouses, and they treat
the child as “glue” that will hold their

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relationship together. Many parents have

children for the sake of having a do-over of
their traumatised childhood under the false
delusion they will give their children a better
life than the one they had. Some parents feel
they have failed to fulfil their career or life
aspirations and proceed to have children to
live out their failed endeavours without
considering what the child may want to do
in the future. Society and parents have been
exploiting children since the very beginning
of time, and the only solution to combat this
is to recognise our limitations, flaws, and
weaknesses and acknowledge that not
having children is the only way to truly
safeguard them from the inner ills that
plague us.

The Right to Life

The right to life (or more commonly

known as the anti-abortion or pro-life
movement) is a reactionary movement in
response to second-wave feminism and the
sexual revolution in the 1960s. It sought to
fight for human dignity and claimed to
advocate for women’s health interests. The

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

very vocal movement is deeply rooted in

organised religion, with Pope Pius XII
publishing the following:

“Every human being, even

the child in the womb, has
the right to life directly from
God and not from his
parents, not from any society
or human authority.
Therefore, there is no man,
no society, no human
authority, no science, no
“indication” at all whether it
be medical, eugenic, social,
economic, or moral that may
offer or give a valid judicial
title for direct deliberate
disposal of an innocent
human life…

-- Pope Pius
XII, Address to Midwives on
the Nature of Their

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Profession Papal Encyclical,

October 29, 1951.”

In her article titled Negative Mental

Health Consequences of Unwanted
Childbirth and Restricted Abortions,
Rheyanne Weaver explains the negative
consequences of forced childbirth
psychologically and socially that are
intrinsically linked with negative mental
health outcomes, including depression and
anxiety and increased risk for suicide. She
explains how mental health consequences
will lead to toxic environments that are non-
conducive for raising children where
children are resented by their mothers and
physically punished.
Humans have tried to justify their reasons
for procreation since the very beginning of
time, whether through children’s rights or
the pro-life movement, but usually, there is
some type of selfish, self-serving agenda
behind this. This point is well articulated in
his book Better Never to Have Been: The

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

Harm of Coming into Existence by Professor

David Benatar.

“Creating new people, by

having babies, is so much a
part of human life that it is
rarely thought even to
require a justification.
Indeed, most people do not
even think about whether
they should have a baby.
They just make one. In other
words, procreation is usually
the consequence of sex rather
than the result of a decision
to bring people into existence.
Those who decide to have a
child might do so for many
reasons, but among these
reasons cannot be the
interests of the potential
child. One can never have a
child for that child’s sake.”

Child Rights Advocacy

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In his brilliant speech for the UN titled

“For Unborn Rights,” Theophile de Giraud
demonstrates a perfect example of child
rights advocacy. In his speech, he says

“I will speak in the name of the

unborns”. We live in a world of
tormentors of victims of injustices of
inequalities of rapes, violence, and
unnameable societal sufferings. Without
even mentioning all the diseases, natural
disasters, cancers, and other depressions
that daily devastate our wretched
humanity. What then of the child's best
interest which our societies now claim
respect?
The child's best interest is, by all
evidence, not to be brought into existence
in a world as tragically painful as ours.
Therefore, I propose to inscribe our
charter for the 21st Century that the first
human right should not be born. If,
unfortunately, this first right is violated,
the second right should be to have good
parents, not only loving and non-violent
but also competent in education matters.

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

For this purpose, lessons on parenting

would be most welcome as part of
compulsory courses in high school. It
would be indispensable that everyone puts
to oneself this question before procreating.
Will my child be happy to have me as a
parent? Considering the incalculable
number of stupid people or of squarely
malevolent individuals who live on this
planet, it's allowed to doubt about it.
In truth, the child is a gift that the
parents offer to themselves out of pure
selfishness, with no other concern than
to please themselves without any
consideration for the welfare of the child
to be born. Even if it means procreating
in times of war or society as monstrous
as ours, hence, the THIRD HUMAN
RIGHT SHOULD BE TO HAVE THE
POSSIBILITY TO BRING A LAWSUIT
AGAINST ONE’S PARENTS if one
deems been brought into existence and if
one experiences life less as a gift than as
an unbearable burden.
If not being born is indeed in the
child's best interest, refusing to give birth
to a new child is also beneficial for the

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environment. All scientists agree that

overpopulation is the main factor in
eradicating biodiversity. Yet, we can
observe that women prefer quality over
quantity in matters of procreation. When
women can freely make use, use their
body and have access to family, they
make the choices to inflict life on very
few children:
There is an average of 1.5 child per
woman in Europe, well below the
renewable generation threshold. In other
words, when women enjoy sexual
freedom, they spontaneously cause a
decrease in the world’s population and
slowly but surely lead to a peaceful
extinction. Feminism is, therefore, well
and truly the solar key to a salvific and
libertarian denatalism (Denatalism –
Neo-Malthusianism). Thus it seems to
me essential to inscribe in our charter
the right of ALL WOMAN SHOULD BE
TO HAVE UNCONDITIONAL AND
FREE ACCESS TO CONTRACEPTION
AND ABORTION – as well as to
voluntary sterilisation, just as free must
also apply to men who want it: glory to

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

the vasectomy, dear gentlemen, I

consequently propose to modify the
motion 5.2 and to formulate it is as
follows: << The right to life and physical
integrity must apply to all humans as
well as to all animals. ALREADY
BORN!!! ALREADY BORN!!!
Regarding the not-yet-born human
beings. The RIGHT TO NOT BE BORN
MUST TAKE PRECEDENCE OVER
ALL OTHER RIGHTS and be promoted
by unconditional and free access to
contraception, abortion, and voluntary
sterilisation.>>
I strongly hope you will follow me on
all these points that go to the core of the
most fundamental ethical issues. Ethics
will compel us to end this immorality and
cruelty that procreation is one day or
another. The best would be to stop it now.
When Thales of Miletus was asked why
he did not have children, he replied,
<<Because I love and respect
children>>. A great lesson of wisdom
and benevolence upon which we should
seriously meditate… Now to the people
who want to discover more on these

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topics, I warmly welcome the book of the

German philosopher Karim Akerma
entitled “Antinatalismus = Ein Hanbūch.
It is a masterpiece and a real goldmine
on antinatalism. Antinatalism, the new
philosophy of Love and Compassion.”

We need to shift towards advocacy for

the unborn with antinatalism at the forefront
of the child rights advocacy movement. This
begins with acknowledging the harsh reality
of the world we live in as being
overwhelmingly unpleasant and not a
suitable environment for procreation. The
shift towards a child rights advocacy
movement should aim to reduce the
bureaucracy in fostering and adoption
processes. Once the clearance has been
made, the prospective adopted or foster
parents are suitable candidates for providing
a healthy environment for unwanted
children. Secondly, the cost of medical
fertility treatments such as surrogacy and
IVF should either be outlawed or altogether
become exorbitantly priced to disincentivise
people to spend ridiculous amounts of
money on fertility treatments when they can

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

adopt or foster. The other arm of child rights

advocacy should aim to gradually shift
towards a world where all major policies
and decisions any nation or international
community makes consider future
generations' welfare before those currently
alive. If we cannot improve the situation in
the world for the next generation, we should
at least consider it is better to never have
been than to come into existence only to
suffer.
This chapter covered the origins of
natural rights and their origins
philosophically from ancient Greece and
how they help determine the quality of our
lives. We explored the origins of human
rights and touched on various articles from
the United Nations to explain how we are
failing children and only using rights to
virtue signal our so-called care and concern
for child welfare. We touched on the right to
life movements and both sides of the pro-life
and pro-choice arguments with a new
perspective towards advocating rights for
the unborn and considering it a paradigm
shift towards child rights advocacy. In the
next chapter we will explore how people are

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indoctrinated into having children by society

and the government.

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 CHAPTER THREE

How People Are Indoctrinated Into The

Cult Of Progeny

“Collective fear stimulates herd

instinct and tends to produce ferocity
toward those who are not regarded as
members of the herd.”

― Bertrand Russell
 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

Tribal Instincts

Tribalism is understood as “groupness”

or group affiliation rooted in basic human
psychology. Everyone, everywhere, has
tribal instincts and the need to belong,
although these instincts do not operate the
same way for everyone. Tribal thinking is a
basic instinct instilled in us by evolution that
provides us with survival emotions to ensure
we survive, thrive, and pass on our genes.
Modern-day tribalism manifests in
regionalism, religious subdivided sects,
political ideologies, languages, etcetera.
Tribalism is a selfish act of loyalty to a tribe
that seeks to acquire pride, honour,
reciprocity, and the will to power. The basic
unit of evolution is the gene, and genes are
selfish because they only use humans as a
vehicle for replication and their only
purpose is to survive. Humans are social
creatures and are ill-equipped to live on their
own. Hence, tribalism became a crucial part
of human evolution. Tribalism and social
bonding help keep individuals committed to

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

the group, even when conflicts may occur in

personal relationships. The desire to
procreate is not only rooted in genes, but it
is also part of our tribal instincts – this is
often why we feel pressured to procreate
when we notice our friends, relatives, and
peer groups doing so. This also explains
why we drift apart from our friends when
they get married and remain single.
Similarly, we are often socially pressured to
enter into relationships after our friends and
family have paired up with other people.

The Herd Mentality

The Herd mentality, mob mentality, or

pack mentality are behavioural
characteristics that describe how people
adopt certain behaviours on a largely
emotional rather than rational basis. People
imitate one another or adopt similar
behaviours to those around them regardless
of their feelings about those behaviours deep
down inside. It relates to blindly following
the herd and doing what they do, and the
phenomenon has been documented in peer-
reviewed psychological studies. In 2008,

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Professor Jens Krause and Dr. John Dyer of

Leeds conducted an experiment where
subjects were told to walk randomly inside a
big hall while not communicating with the
other subject. The researchers told a few of
the subjects where they should walk, and
others followed them. 95% followed other
walkers, and only 5% of people were
confident to walk independently. The desire
to procreate is not only rooted in genes, but
it is also part of the herd mentality, similar
to our tribal instincts. According to research
led by the University of Exeter, “a natural
desire to be part of the “in crowd” could
damage our ability to make the right
decisions.” The research shows the
individuals have evolved to be overly
influenced by their neighbours rather than
rely on their instincts. This demonstrates
how destructive procreation can be,
especially based on peer pressure.

Parenthood Is Overly Glamourised

The above figure demonstrates the main

reasons people procreate. All other reasons
stem from the above reasons. There is

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

usually a lot of pressure from family,

friends, and our culture to reproduce. This
begins as soon as we are toddlers; we are
inundated with propaganda featuring happy
families with two married heterosexual
adults, 2.5 kids, a white picket fence, with a
dog living in a big dream house in suburbia.
This life script is supposed to be the epitome
of the Western dream that will provide us
with infinite happiness, joy, and fulfilment.
As soon as they are old enough to
understand cartoons and bedtime stories,
little girls are bombarded with fairy tales
promising them they will one day be a
princess, find a prince charming, have a
fairy tale wedding, and live happily ever
after. The children’s toy section is saturated
with dolls for little girls to play with, and
this instils in them the pressure to become
mothers when they get older.
Young boys are often programmed to be
warrior-like, and they are inundated with toy
swords, guns, and other toys, often having
the purpose of rescuing the damsel in
distress. We see this in video games like
Super Mario Land. This is all subconscious
programming designed to socially influence

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us to follow these life scripts. It also

indirectly implies that if we have failed to
achieve these milestones or failed to follow
this life script (and for some reason, we
decide to choose an alternative pathway
towards happiness and fulfilment), we
become failures and ostracised and shamed
for it by society. Furthermore, motherhood
and pregnancy are overly glamourised by
pop culture and celebrities, many of whom
have a cult-like following of young
adolescent girls. The media had spent much
of the early 2010s glamourising teen
pregnancies with films and television
programs such as Juno, 16 and Pregnant,
Teen Mom, and The American Teenager's
Secret Life. It is no coincidence there was an
increase in teen pregnancies after these
shows aired.
On the opposite end of the spectrum,
many glossy women’s magazines have been
glamourising pregnancy among women over
the age of 40. Researchers at New York
University found that more than half of
celebrity pregnancies in magazines like
Cosmopolitan, People Magazine, and US
Weekly were over 35. Examples of

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

celebrities who have over-glorified geriatric

pregnancies are Mariah Carey, Nicole
Kidman, Janet Jackson, and Halle Berry,
many of whom got pregnant via IVF, some
of whom have still misled the public about
their pregnancies.

Social Pressure

In her blog post “9 responses to the

people who always ask when I’m going to
have kids,” Sydney Kleinman explains how
people are quick to shame and accuse her of
choosing her career over motherhood. She
explains that people subtly remind her she
has a biological clock, and then they ask for
an explanation for her decision to delay
motherhood. People also have no problem
telling her she is selfish, a failure, and
everyone else has children, so she should.
In an article published in Psychology
Today, a woman reached out to the author of
“Complete without Kids”, Karen Walker,
and explained how her mother and
grandmother were pressured by society to
have children. Walker explains that friends
also pressure their friends to have children,

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and their childfree friends are often left out

of parent get-togethers and eventually drift
apart from their circle of friends and need to
find other childfree friends instead. There is
both direct and subtle pressure put on young
women to procreate, and this leads to mental
health problems because quite often, women
who want to remain childfree are seen as
abnormal and flawed somehow. This
contributes to women settling down and
having children out of fear of judgement or
being ostracised by their peer group of
friends.

Fear of Mortality

Published in The Huffington Post, in his

tribute to Father’s Day, Dr. Mark Echols
says:

“There are few men who have the

opportunity or ability to create legacies
which are recognized throughout history.
Men renowned for their inventions like
Lewis Latimer, Garrett Morgan, Albert
Einstein, Thomas Edison, or George
Washington Carver. Political activists

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

have changed laws and society like a Dr.

Martin Luther King Jr., Mahatma
Gandhi, or Nelson Mandela. Successful
businessmen and philanthropist like Bill
Gates, Steve Jobs, Mark Zuckerberg, or
Reginald F. Lewis. Famous athletes like
the late Muhammad Ali, Michael
Jordan, Lebron James, or Babe Ruth.
While few men can build legacies like
those mentioned above, every father
leaves the legacy of his children. It is
your children who will carry your name
and your lessons across generations
(from your grandchildren and beyond). It
is your children who share their
memories of how passionate you were
about sports, the recipe of your famous
chili, your concern about community, or
belief in the value of a good education. It
is your children who will miss you and
ensure your name will still be mentioned
(even though you were never rich or
famous). Every father is a branch of
their family tree and through our
children, we will always be remembered
(even after we've passed away). This is
what legacy is truly about, and it is why

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being a father is important. My children

are my legacy, which is true not only of
me but for every father. Our children are
our legacies and for most men, the only
legacy which they will leave behind”

Many people decide to have children

because of their fear of mortality. This is
where the concept of “leaving behind a
legacy” originates. People recognise that one
day they will die and return to non-
existence. This fear causes them to act
irrationally because they fear nothingness,
insignificance and being forgotten. Unless it
is documented in a family tree or a famous
ancestor, most people do not know their
ancestors beyond their 4th great grandfather.
Except for national or global historical
figures who make a name for themselves, a
so-called “legacy” will be eaten away by
futility when we die and return to a realm of
nothingness, non-existence and
insignificance.

Egotistical

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

A list of common reasons people give for

procreating are rooted in gratifying their
ego. For example, those who claim to love
children can adopt or foster and they often
have deep complexes and traumas that relate
to their inner child. Some people are
narcissistic and claim to have superior
genes, hence why they justify procreating.
Carrying the family name, bloodline or
desiring a mini-me are all narcissistic
reasons to procreate. Sigmund Freud even
said, “Parental love… is nothing but the
parents’ narcissism born again.” Other
reasons why people have children are
nationalistic or religious reasons to sacrifice
their children for the state or religious
institute. In cases of nationalism, this is
rooted in elitism, xenophobia and eugenics,
similarly, with religion the idea is rooted in
“the more the merrier.”

Selfishness

People have children for selfish reasons

such as desiring a caretaker for themselves
when they reach old age, please society or
their parents, inherit the family business, or

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have someone to leave behind their assets.

No child is obligated to take care of their
parents when they are old because the
parents chose to procreate purely for their
selfish reasons, and much of life involves
needless suffering, therefore children do not
owe their parents anything nor can parents
guarantee their children will care for them
when they are older. So many elderly people
are dumped in rest homes by their children
who have no interest in caring for them.
Children do not need approval from their
parents regarding how they choose to live,
rather than being miserable trying to make
others happy, they should instead focus on
making themselves happy. Not all children
want to work in the family business, some
have other goals, aspirations, dreams, and
desires. Similarly, no amount of financial
wealth can ever compensate a child for
being born, hence wealth or family
businesses can be left to relatives or people
can establish charitable trusts as places to
leave behind their wealth.

Boredom & Purposelessness

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Whether we choose to acknowledge it or

not, life is meaningless and to survive, we
must create our purpose in the world.
Raising children provides a sense of purpose
and meaning in life but no other human
being is obligated to provide meaning and
purpose to anyone’s life. By having a child
for this purpose, the child can easily become
enmeshed with their parent with little to no
healthy boundaries and this will hinder a
child’s ability to become a healthy adult
when they grow up.

Fear of Loneliness

Many women who lack emotional

stability and maturity have children much
early on in life and their children become
caretakers for their emotional needs. These
women have acknowledged one of the main
reasons they have children is because they
are afraid of loneliness. Sometimes they
resent the child because the child becomes a
hindrance for them to achieve their life
goals. Often the child is blamed for being
born. Similarly, some emotionally disturbed
women are looking for someone to love

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them and they believe having children can

heal a broken relationship. In many cases,
having a child cannot keep two people who
already have problems together for life.
Often the child will further strain the
relationship more and somehow end up
resented by the parents.

Parental Regret

In her article titled “Regretful Mothers”

Anne Kingston outlines parental regret
being very much a real thing with more
articles, books and other media coming out
about parental regret and even the
emergence of private Facebook groups
where parents discuss their regret of having
children. There is a rise of shift towards the
childfree lifestyle. Unfortunately, many of
these regretful mothers are bullied and
abused by pronatalist people who constantly
mislabel their behaviour as selfish,
unnatural, abusive, and whiny. Often many
of these women felt pressured to have
children. Several studies indicated parents
were more depressed than their childfree
counterparts. Women who suffered from

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prenatal sadness were often shamed for

feeling this way and they often described
parenthood as an inward prison. Some
countries are expressing concern about their
declining fertility rates, however, often
many women prefer the childfree lifestyle
citing pronatalism as something that serves
the interests of nationalism.
In her article titled “Why having kids
doesn’t necessarily make you happier,
according to research” Cory Stieg outlines
studies that have shown happiness in parents
experiences disappears after one year and
the childfree lifestyle appears to be more
stable. Parents are inundated with constant
low-level stressors that contribute to their
depression and anxiety. Also, the average
cost of raising a child from birth to the age
of 17 in the US is $233,000. Childfree
people tend to have a more disposable
income on activities that make them happier
and contribute to good mental health.
In his book “The Selfish Gene”
evolutionary biologist, Richard Dawkins
states “We are survival machines – robot
vehicles blindly programmed to preserve
the selfish molecules known as genes. This

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is a truth which still fills me with

astonishment.” Although this may be true,
being aware of the harm of procreation gives
one a moral sense of duty and social
responsibility to resist the programming of
this DNA molecule and not procreate to
avoid putting new generations in harm’s
way.
This chapter covered tribal instincts and
the herd mentality, which have been
weaponised against humanity in the grand
scheme of procreation. We further explored
a myriad of reasons why people procreate,
from egotistical reasons to boredom,
purposelessness, social pressure, and fear (of
mortality) and attachment. We also touched
on the expansion of the childfree movement
and lifestyle and parental regret which more
people are vocal about. Going forward, the
next step is to create a safe space and
provide a public platform for people
experiencing parental regret to share their
experiences and help educate potential
future parents about the ramifications of
their decisions. Once we destigmatise
parental regret there will be better awareness
about what the experience of parenthood

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entails before people decide to make any

major life altering decisions. In the next
chapter we explore how the state maintains
power through psychological manipulation
and how traditionalism and organised
religions are weaponised to keep people
enslaved.

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 CHAPTER FOUR

How We Psychologically Manipulate

People Into Enslavement

“Tradition means giving votes to the

most obscure of all classes, our
ancestors. It is the democracy of the
dead. Tradition to submit to the small
and arrogant oligarchy of those who
happen to be walking about.”

― G.K. Chesterton
 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

How The State Maintains Power

According to Merriam-Webster
Dictionary society is defined as “a
community of people living in a particular
country or region with shared customs, laws
and organisations.” The state is defined as “a
politically organised body of people usually
occupying a definite territory, especially one
sovereign.” Controlling society is extremely
crucial for the state to ensure its self-
preservation. The main forces threatening
state destruction are conquest through war
from other nations and revolution. Self-
preservation relies heavily on maintaining
power structures by ensuring that a small
ruling caste remains in power and people are
divided. State rule is one of aristocracy’s
“rules by divine right” – this is apparent
even in countries with separation of church
and state. Although in recent times the new
God that has replaced religion has become
science, the union of religious institutions
and the state has always been an unholy
alliance, but the ultimate manifestation of
ruling is by divine decree. The main

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objective is to convince society that they are

prime beneficiaries of this ruling caste, and
this is done by ensuring most of society are
influenced by their ideology. This heavily
instils fear of alternative systems such as
anarchy or the childfree lifestyle. The
concept of tradition is a manipulation tool
used by the state designed to prolong and
preserve their rule through ancestor worship.
One of the other greatest threats to the state
is independent intellectual criticism because
independent thinkers will always question
the state. The state also seeks to control
people through propaganda to protect them
from false internal or external threats and
the state is needed to ensure they defend
themselves from any threat even though this
threat may be non-existent.

Sources of Indoctrination

In his book, Dark Psychology and

Manipulation, William Cure identifies three
main entities responsible for indoctrinating
us, parents (home), teachers (school) and
institutions (politicians and government).
Indoctrination is done through rote training

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

which involves constant repetition and

memorisation of “facts” and reaffirming
those “facts” and obstructing the truth to
benefit the ruling caste. This begins at home
with our parents and continues at school
until the age of 18 and we see repetitive
patterns of this in religious, workplace,
government, and political institutions. We
are expected to blindly follow and refrain
from critical thinking and questioning
authority, threatening the status quo. The
main idea we are indoctrinated with is the
life script as aforementioned earlier in
Chapter 3.

Social Influences

Social influences used to manipulate us

into enslavement are ethics, morality,
religion, tradition, and social norms and this
is done deceptively through illusions or fears
of being rejected, having no purpose, and
not belonging. Going back to the herd
mentality and tribal instincts mentioned in
the previous chapter, we will be rewarded
with acceptance, purpose, and a sense of
belonging if we comply with what the state

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expects of us. If we stray away from that we

will be ostracised, looked at strangely, have
no purpose in life and be rejected by most
people. We will examine these social
influences and how they have influenced
people to continue breeding.

Ethics

According to the Merriam-Webster

dictionary, “ethics are defined as a discipline
dealing with what is good and bad and with
moral duty and obligation based on a set of
moral principles and values concerned with
conduct governing both individual or groups
as a guiding philosophy and consciousness
of moral importance.” Until the Age of
Enlightenment, theocratic rule that does not
separate between religious institutions and
the state was the norm in many countries
such as Mesopotamia, Egypt, Persia, China,
Tibet, Rome, and Greece. Hence, the morals
of institutional religions were the entire
foundation of ethics and morality as a
whole. For example, in his book, Ethics of
Procreation and Defense of Human Life,
Martin Rhonheimer discusses ethics and

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morality of procreation according to

Catholicism:

“The determining function of our

reproductive organs and their use
according to their function morally
permissible, while using them contrary to
their functions is morally impermissible.
The correct analysis of human sexuality
is to unite husband and wife to transmit
life. It is wrong to intentionally prevent
intercourse or conception from its
natural meaning contraception distorts
the meaning of marital union which
must create offspring to be a truly
marital union. Satisfying impulses is
morally wrong. Openness to procreation
elevates sensually integrating it in the life
of the spirit. Contraception is labelled a
violation of virtue, temperance, and
chastity because it is “artificial” and
periodic continence should be used to
avoid conception. Desires do not enslave
rational beings but whose desires are
controlled by reason – this includes our
desire for sex. Contraception removes the
responsibility of self-control and

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modification of sexual behaviour.

Natural procreation supports
fundamental human equality.”

Although contraceptive methods and

abortions have existed long before the
sexual revolution, for much of human
history, the above quotation was the attitude
in the masses regarding what entails moral
and ethical human sexuality and anything
that deviates from this norm is frowned
upon seen as hedonistic and degenerate.
Long after the separation of church and
state, this attitude remained in the human
psyche. The hidden hand in this
psychological manipulation is the unholy
alliance of religious and state institutions
who dictate ethics and morality based on
their self-interests to the masses. In both
cases, the strength of both institutions is
reliant on the number of adherents and the
more is always the merrier. We are only
recently beginning to see a shift in ethics in
terms of procreation and the best interests of
the child sparked by antinatalism and
Benatar’s book Better Never To Have Been.

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

Morality

According to Merriam-Webster morality

is defined as a doctrine or system of moral
conduct based on ideals of right human
conduct. Morality is about moral standards
related to behaviour, moral responsibility
concerning conscience, and moral identity
related to right or wrong deeds. Author C.S.
Lewis defines the purpose of morality to
ensure fair play and harmony between
individuals, to help make us good people to
have a good society and be in a good
relationship with the power that created us.
Religious commitment has often been
strongly associated with moral conduct. “Be
fruitful and multiply” in Genesis is used to
reference the event of the great flood in the
Bible. It is often wrongly cited as a moral
duty by Christians. According to the Old
Testament, childbearing and maximising
fertility are good things according to the Old
Testament and many people often cite these
as legitimate moral duties to procreate. More
than half the people on earth adhere to
Christianity and Islam, both of which
promote procreation and families as the

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building blocks of society, therefore

justifying procreation as a moral obligation
and duty to society.

Social Norms

Social norms are defined by sociology as

social standards put in place by society that
regulate appropriate and inappropriate
behaviour. Their main objective is to
provide social order by regulating human
behaviour. These are often based on what is
right and important for society. Unlike
individual values, social values regulate the
thought-process and behaviour of society as
a collective. We are social creatures and are
incapable of existing alone which is why
man is always dependent upon society and
we have been led to believe that adhering to
society’s norms is in our best interests.
When we do not act in society’s best
interests, we lose prestige and are subjected
to ridicule, ostracism, and punishment
compared to those who adhere to social
norms who receive praise, prestige and
positive rewards from society. Society and
the state are the prime beneficiaries of us

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

procreating despite the fact it is a deceptive

scheme against the children we are forcing
into existence.

As demonstrated in Figure 3, society is

constructed in its self-interest and social
norms are a mechanism for self-preservation
established by the ruling powers. Society is
not constructed in the best interest of
children, yet children are the future and hope
of our society. Our society is too broken,
and the foundation is rotten and heading

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towards collapse both socially,

environmentally, and economically. Yet, we
dare to dictate so-called “morals” that we
delude ourselves into believing serve
everybody’s interests, but they serve
nobody’s interests except the ruling classes
who justify and find every lie in the book as
a reason to justify imposing life on children
without their consent. If the foundation of a
house is not solid, the future will always
mean it needs band aid maintenance, but one
day, after so many band aid solutions, the
house will finally collapse and we are due to
see that in the next upcoming decades, yet
we feel entitled to be worshipped by our
descendants when the last thing we deserve
is honour.

Acceptance, Purpose and Belonging

As discussed in the previous chapter, we

are manipulated into procreating because it
provides a sense of acceptance, purpose and
belonging. We are taught from very young
age to trust society and when we do so, we
open ourselves up to being manipulated.

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

Society glamourises pregnancy and

parenthood while suppressing the unpleasant
sides of the reality of our existence and the
challenges of parenthood by avoiding the
bigger picture as a manipulation tactic to
encourage procreation. Human existence is
the root of all problems and avoiding this
harsh reality is deliberately suppressing the
truth about the human condition. With
humans being herd animals, we do not care
if acceptance, purpose, and belonging are on
a purely superficial level, because the nail
that sticks out will always get hammered
down. Hence, it is important to always
examine the bigger picture and weigh the
pros and cons before making a major life
altering decision that affects somebody
else’s entire welfare and existence.

Tradition

According to Merriam-Webster defines

tradition as “an inherited, established and
customary pattern of thought, action or
behaviour that relates to the past that is
commonly accepted as historical though not
verifiable that is handed down from one

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generation to another without written

instruction.” Before the 20th Century,
women have mostly been traditionally
valued for their reproductive capabilities and
their ability to either serve God or man and
this has only served to advance cultural
stereotypes, biases and assumptions that all
women want to be mothers.
In her paper, “The Tradition of
Reproduction" published in the Arizona Law
Review,” Paula Abrams explains how
society circumscribed women solely to their
reproductive function to bear children. She
explains that patriarchal cultures have been
strongly pronatalist for economic and
political reasons that have limited women to
their biological roles. In the Old Testament,
fertility is associated with high political
power and the Talmud teaches that “he who
does not engage in the propagation of the
race is as though he sheds blood.” She
further explains the role of patriarchy in
philosophy and how the pronatalist tradition
created polygamy to assure multitudes of
offspring as sources of labour and
protection. Herodotus said, “great riches to
men are the greatest number of sons”. In

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

Babylonia, a sterile marriage was grounds

for divorce. Aristotle wrote “the production
of children is preordained by nature for the
perpetuation of the species and particularly
for the sustenance of parents when they are
old.”
Pronatalism has been a tradition since the
beginning of time which is why we are
inundated with propaganda to breed, and we
do so not only to follow the herd but for
economic, social, and political reasons.
Society has always been obsessed with
controlling human sexuality, particularly
female sexuality to ensure its survival and
best interests are prioritised above children's
best interests. As our values have shifted and
we have evolved consciously, mentally, and
psychologically, many of these religious and
philosophical beliefs have become outdated,
archaic, and no longer relevant in today’s
day and age. Hence, it is crucial to remind
ourselves of the past atrocities women
experienced due to these destructive belief
systems. While many men have also
suffered due to feminism, especially in the
court system, antinatalism still holds the key
to bridging the divides between the sexes.

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This is done by acknowledging the upper

classes' need to breed the lower classes to
sustain their power. Everybody’s
reproductive capabilities are collectively
exploited solely to ensure corrupt and
oppressive power structures to continue their
rein on the rest of humanity.

Ancestor Worship

Animism is one of the oldest religions

globally, and ancestor worship is common in
animism. Ancestral spirits are believed to
influence the fertility of women and crops.
In her article titled “Praying for Life – Top
10 Ancient Fertility Goddesses”, Aleksa
Vučković explains fertility and the female
form were deeply connected by nature and it
goes as far back as the palaeolithic eras
primitive societies worshipped various
fertility goddesses from as far back as
300,000 years or more. She explains how
women, earth and fertility were combined as
deities to ensure a bountiful harvest, safe
childbirth, and the celebration of
procreation. Fertility worship was a common
aspect of many of the world’s heathen

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

cultures known as fertility goddesses.

Swollen breasts and pregnant bellies were
frequently depicted on many ancient
artefacts which possessed a universal
motherly power throughout the ages with
deities embodying this such as Ostara,
Freyja and Nerthus of Germany, Hera of
Greece, Dodola and Živa of Russia, Inanna
of Mesopotamia, Kaltes-Ekwa of Western
Siberia, Taweret of Egypt and Xōchiquetzal
of the Aztecs. It has also been said
traditional African religious values equate
fertility with virtue, spiritual approval and
infertility with reproductive failure or
cessation with sin.
While matriarchal societies
acknowledged female divinity compared to
their patriarchal counterparts, the concept of
glorifying fertility appears to unify both
sides as a common denominator. Even after
worldwide religious conquests by patriarchal
religions, primitive societies who have
adopted Abrahamic religions still retain their
traditions of glorifying fertility and
associating it with blessing and abundance.
This is no longer the case in modern times
because family farming economies have

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become obsolete since as far back as the

industrial revolution. All over the world,
existence has become more difficult,
competitive, and burdensome due to the rich
getting richer and the poor getting poorer
and scarcity in resources, austerity measures
and an overall lower quality of life.
This chapter covered psychological
manipulation of the masses, how the state
maintains power, sources of indoctrination,
social influences such as ethics, morality,
social norms, and the future of society,
acceptance, purpose, and belonging. We also
explored traditions such as religion and
ancestor worship. Going forward, the next
step is to become more conscious of how we
have been manipulated and begin raising
more awareness about it to enable people to
think more critically before making life-
altering decisions. We also need to create a
mass campaign to promote breaking free
from this programming and focusing on
critical thinking rather than blindly
following the herd in a mindless, zombie,
idle mindset. In the next part we will explore
what it means to acknowledge life for what

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

it truly is and how this will help further the

antinatalist agenda.

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 Part 2 – A Deeper Lens

CHAPTER FIVE

Acknowledging Facts For What They

Are

“I am not pointing fingers, but rather

pointing at the facts, as the facts point
fingers, regardless.”

― Nathan Hong
 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

The biggest problem in life is that people
do not like to deal with reality, the truth or
harsh facts even though deep down inside
they know they eventually have to come
face to face with them someday. Everybody
knows there are so many wrong things in
this world, yet they still choose to procreate.
We mass consume resources at an
exponential rate to the point that the earth’s
resources are depleted and there is not
enough time to replenish them by the time
they have been consumed. Perhaps being
oblivious and turning a blind eye is the only
survival mechanism to retain and salvage
what is left of our sanity. What is difficult to
comprehend is how people prioritise their
selfish desires over the needs of future
generations who will face unprecedented
times living in a draconian era where there
will be mass wars over resources, inflation
will be sky high and most jobs will be
outsourced or automated. In contrast, people
become more dependent on the government
for their universal basic income.

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Overpopulation

The world population has been on the rise

non-stop for 600 years and is expected to
continue growing for at least 100 years
reaching almost 11 billion by the year of
2100. When I was born the world’s
population was 5.3 billion people, now 3O+
years later, we are rapidly approaching 8
billion people. It is estimated the world’s
population grows on average at around 81
million people annually. By 2030, almost 5
billion people on earth will be part of the
consumer class when the population reaches
8.5 billion people. Overpopulation is defined
as an increase in population that exceeds the
earth’s ecological bearing capacity where
the number of people outnumber the
availability of essential materials for
survival such as transport, food, water,
shelter and social amenities. This contributes
to environmental degradation which
destroys quality of life and leads to
depletion of natural resources, accelerated
habitat loss, loss of biodiversity, amplified
climate change, amplified climate change,

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

depreciation of freshwater resources, lower

life expectancy, diminished quality of life,
pandemics and epidemics, intensive farming
practices and rise in unemployment crime
rates and violence. In overpopulated cities
such as Shanghai, Mumbai, Caracas, Mexico
City and Manila, people struggle daily,
which leads to locking themselves in
concrete jungles where they become
disconnected from nature.
According to theworldcounts.com, it is
estimated that 55 billion tonnes of fossil
energy, minerals and metals and biomass are
extracted from the earth. The world has lost
80% of its forests and is losing what is left
of them at 375km2 per day. 5-10% of
tropical forest species will become extinct
every decade. Every hour 1,692 acres of
productive dry land becomes desert. 27% of
coral reefs have been destroyed and it is
estimated 60% of what is remaining will be
gone in the next 30 years. The garbage
floating in the ocean, most of which is
plastic is the size of India, Europe and
Mexico combined. We consume 50% more
natural resources than what the earth can
provide. With the current population we

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need 1.5 earths to sustain these consumption

levels.

Environmental Catastrophes

Based on scientific data and peer

reviewed literature, the United Nations
Environmental Program (UNEP) published a
press release outlining various world regions
and the environmental threats they currently
face which relate to rapid urbanisation,
rising levels of consumption, desertification
and land degradation. In Latin America and
the Caribbean, extreme weather events are
expected to devastating their national
economies. In the Asia and Pacific region
hundreds of millions of people are displaced
with coastal flooding disasters in Bangkok,
Dhaka, Guangzhou, Kolkata, Mumbai and
Shanghai. 91% of world deaths are
attributed to natural disasters in this region
with 41% of all natural disasters being in
this region and approximately 1 million
hectares of land is lost to deforestation in
this region every year. West Asia is
experiencing rapid desertification with

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higher demands and more overexploitation

leading to a deterioration of water quality.
Furthermore, the remnants of radiation
from wars have also contributed to
deteriorating water quality. Refugees have
become an environmental burden with an
average of 70,000 premature deaths in the
region each year. In Africa, the main
problems appear to be land degradation,
water shortages, and 600,000 premature
deaths per year. More than half of sub-
Saharan Africa lacks sanitation and
investment in technology and infrastructure.
Overcultivation, inefficient irrigation
practices, overgrazing, overexploitation of
resources and mining activities have
contributed to severe land degradation in
Africa. It is expected this will lead to
reduced agricultural production, food
security issues, increased migration, disease
spread, destruction of infrastructure, and
high poverty rates. North American land is
being degraded through hydrocarbon
extraction, seismicity with expectations of
coastal and marine environmental
degradation and nutrient loads, ocean
acidification, ocean warming, sea level rise

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and marine debris. There have been many

droughts, hurricanes, and floods that have
affected food production and concerns about
water quality. The arctic has seen an
increase in the melting of sea ice, increased
surface area, glacier loss, 80% ice loss and
increased phytoplankton altering the marine
food chain.

Future Wars – Water & Food Security

Only 0.4% of the world’s drinkable water

is accessible to humans. Historically
speaking, water has been used as a tool for
warfare because of tribal conflicts, border
tensions, ethnic warfare, terrorism and
political actions. Because of its crucial
necessity, water has been weaponised in
conflicts in various ways through poisoning,
dams and destruction. With a growing
population expected to reach 8 billion soon,
disputes over potable water sources are
common, especially in scarce
water. Rightful ownership is often contested
whenever a water source such as a lake, a
river, or an underground aquifer crosses
national borders.

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According to several authors, news

articles and a new study from NASA, World
War III will be fought over water scarcity.
NASA recently released a mapped study
revealing 32 out of the world’s resources are
distressed due to overuse or mass
consumption from humans. Many of those
distresses correlate with conflict regions or
high tension areas such as India, China and
Bhutan. Geopolitical analysts anticipate
there will be wars fought over water. In an
article published in National Geographic,
many overpopulated cities such as Beijing,
Shanghai and Mexico City are sinking as
groundwater is depleted. The groundwater in
Beijing is depleted to the stage where more
than 20 million people could face serious
disruptions to local infrastructure.
The world’s largest underground water
reserves in Africa, Eurasia and the American
continents are severely threatened due to
unsustainable consumption rates. Other
contributing factors to water scarcity include
drought, poor pumping management, flood
irrigation, leaky pipes in big cities, aging
infrastructure, inadequate technology,
population growth and increased demand for

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food production. The majority of

groundwater consumed irrigates agriculture
and the rest supplies drinking water to cities.
The World Bank estimates water stressed
parts of the world could see a 6% decline in
their GDP as more water resources become
scarce.

According to Richard Damania, a lead

economist at the World Bank:

“As regions and

nations run short of
water, economic growth
will decline and food
prices will spike, raising
the risk of violent conflict
and waves of large
migrations. Unrest in
Yemen, which heavily
taps into groundwater and
experienced water riots in
2009, is rooted in a water
crisis. Experts say water
scarcity also helped
destabilize Syria and
launch its civil war.

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Jordan, which relies on

aquifers as its only source
of water, is even more
water-stressed now that
more than a half-million
Syrian refugees arrived.”

According to Innovative Energy and

Innovation, the following water sources are
stressed enough to raise concern about
possible conflicts in the future.

§ The River Columbia (conflict

between Canada and the US).
§ The Colorado River (conflict
between Mexico and the US).
§ The River Senepas (conflict
between Ecuador and Peru).
§ The River Senegal (conflict
between Mauritania and Senegal).
§ The River Zambezi (conflict
between Zambia, Zimbabwe and
Botswana).
§ The sources in the Sahara
Desert (Reaction Egypt, Chad, Niger
and Sudan).

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§ The River Nile (conflict

between Egypt and Ethiopia).
§ The River Tagus (conflict
between Tagus and Duero).
§ The River Syr Darya (conflict
between Uzbekistan and Tajikistan,
Kazakhstan)
§ The River Ganges (conflict
between India and Bangladesh).
§ The Jordan River (the
conflict between Israel and Jordan).
§ The Mekong River (conflict
between Cambodia, Laos, Thailand
and Vietnam)

During the COVID-19 global pandemic,

we tasted price increases, inflation, scarcity,
people panic buying and trying to capitalise
on fear. Without a doubt we will experience
more difficulties ahead where food and
freshwater resources will be weaponised
against us. It has also been predicted that
there will be more attempts to centralise,
privatise, and control the earth’s water
supply via programs such as the “Global
Water Initiative” used to manufacture
droughts leading to starvation.

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Poverty & Social Ills

Poverty is one of the many roots of evil

in the world. Many social problems come,
such as rising joblessness, outsourcing of
menial jobs and automation, leading to more
unemployment, organised crime, social
revolt, and more interpersonal and ethnic
conflicts. It will also lead to a rise in living
costs, fewer resources, less water and more
people packed into more confined spaces.
Only a small percentage of the population
will keep up with living costs to meet their
needs. Depopulation of rural areas will lead
to underutilisation of infrastructure and
these ecosystems will deteriorate without
human attention. The future of humanity in
the global village will be one of frustration,
hopelessness and value for life. Suicide rates
will rise along with fraud, money
laundering, drug trafficking, sex work,
corruption and human trafficking. Poverty
will create more children loitering in the
streets exposed to various hazards and risks
including antisocial activities that will
devastatingly affect society. Procreation will
undoubtedly perpetuate illiteracy, continue

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the vicious cycle of poverty, and increase

preventative diseases, pollution, and lack of
healthcare services.
According to the United Nations
Department of Defense and Crime, the
definition of trafficking in persons’ means
“the recruitment, transportation, transfer,
harbouring or receipt of persons, through
threat or use of force or other forms of
coercion, of abduction, of fraud, of
deception, of the abuse of power or a
position of vulnerability or the giving or
receiving of payments or benefits to achieve
the consent of a person having control over
another person, for exploitation.
Exploitation shall include, at a minimum,
the exploitation of the prostitution of others
or other forms of sexual exploitation, forced
labour or services, slavery or practices like
slavery, servitude or the removal of organs.”
In an article published by Borgen Project,
Erika Wright explains how human
trafficking is a global epidemic that occurs
in every single country and the widening
gap between the rich, poor and migration
patterns are one of the key catalysts for this
social disease. Traffickers lure migrants with

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opportunities for a better life and then they

are controlled and threatened by the
traffickers. The poor are preyed upon with
false promises of employment and education
opportunities, remuneration in addition to
better life conditions. In reality, the
trafficker does not deliver on any of the
promises made and the victims are then
forced to do other work such as prostitution
or hard labour receiving little or no pay,
resulting in them still living essentially in
extreme poverty. Due to poverty, some
parents sell their children to an industry that
makes 32 billion dollars annually.
The future looks bleak for humanity
including those who live in developed
countries. Without a doubt, we will start to
see developed and developing countries
become underdeveloped due to
overpopulation. We are already
experiencing natural disasters and
catastrophic weather changes which have
contributed to increases in food prices. We
are also experiencing water shortages where
our respective governments instruct us to
adhere to water restrictions. During the
COVID-19 Pandemic, we witnessed a surge

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in various goods and services prices. This is

only the beginning and the future that awaits
younger generations is a very bleak one
which is why we must ask the question, “Is
having children ethical knowing what
dangers await them ahead in terms of
inflation, increased food prices, water
shortages, natural disasters, human
trafficking as well as other social issues that
relate to poverty?”
This chapter covered overpopulation,
water shortages, geopolitical tensions, and
wars relating to ecological changes. We also
touched on various regions and potential
disasters that await them as cited in
scientific and peer reviewed literature. We
examined poverty and social ills such as
human trafficking that threaten the future
fate and overall security of the next
generations. The next step is to raise
awareness about overpopulated countries
experiencing these harsh difficulties and
campaigning against procreation. The
answer lies in incentivising people to be
childfree to prevent unnecessary suffering
and tragedies that will needlessly plague
future generations.

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CHAPTER SIX

Acknowledging Futility

“Contrary to popular opinion or the
escapist trends of society, false hope is no
way better than a harsh truth. A harsh truth
is painful to accept, but there’s healing at
the other end. On the other hand, false hope
is dangerous and offers no reward. Not
immediately, nor with time. It never pays
off.”

― Northern Adams

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What is futility?

According to the Oxford Dictionary

futility is defined as pointlessness or
uselessness –having no purpose because
there is no chance of success. In his essay
titled “The Futility of Life” published in
Truth Magazine, Terry Benton explains how
desire to find reasons to live and these boil
down to finding happiness, having a dream
of attaining popularity, riches or prestige
and having others acknowledge our
importance. This is why we try to make
positive contributions to make our existence
more meaningful. He references The Book
of Ecclesiastes as acknowledging the futility
of life as bringing inherently part of the
human experience that is an “alluring
mirage” pulling down each avenue ending in
futility.
In “The Essays of Arthur Schopenhauer;
Studies in Pessimism” Schopenhauer
discusses the vanity of existence where he
states that “unrest is the mark of existence”.
He explains that man is never happy and he
spends his whole life striving for something
he thinks will make him happy and seldomly

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does he ever attain it. Even that which we

attain in life remains unattainable – physical
and aesthetic beauty fades away, all the
wealth, knowledge and wisdom we acquire
vanishes into nothingness with along with
our remains when we die yet to quote
Schopenhauer “The heart rebels against this,
and feels that it cannot be true. The crudest
intellect cannot speculate on such a subject
without having a presentiment that Time is
something ideal in its nature.”
One of the main reasons people procreate
is vanity and satiate their boredom and
purposelessness. But the question remains,
knowing how hellish existential dread can
be is it ethical to gamble with a somebody
else’s life without their consent and leave
them behind to inherit the inevitable fate of
futility that no soul on this earth is exempt
from? There was this one time at work when
one of my Buddhist colleagues from Sri
Lanka told me one of the fundamental
principle of Buddhism is “you are dying and
you are in essence a walking corpse and
once you remember this you will start to
treat people better and be at peace with
yourself.” Everybody has seen beauty

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queens age, wealthy successful people end

up broke and everybody knows someone in
their lives who has died. Yet humans desire
immortality which is unattainable unless
your name enters history. Many have sought
to find the fountain of eternal youth but that
has only robbed them of the grace of ageing.
What about the scholars who have pursued
and acquired deep knowledge and wisdom
only to reach longevity and battle the
demons of memory loss, decay and
dementia?
Schopenhauer says, “misfortune is the
general rule of life, suffering is the objective
of life. Work, worry, labour and trouble.
Life is a task to be done. The world where
each of us pays the penalty of existence in
our peculiar way. Man is a compound of
needs and necessities, hard to satisfy; and
that even when they are satisfied, all he
obtains is a state of painlessness, where
nothing remains to him but the abandonment
to boredom. This is direct proof that
existence has no real value in itself; for what
is boredom but the emptiness of life.” This
is the essence of life but we have an
unspoken societal rule and culture about not

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mentioning it. Complaining about life or the

burden of existence is socially unacceptable
to the point your mental health and sanity
are under scrutiny. The cult of existence is a
religion that unites all of mankind as part
and parcel of the human condition but it is
also something we are prohibited from ever
questioning because everybody
automatically assumes we are supposed to
like and enjoy life. Life is mostly tragedy
with some moments of joy in between where
hardship is absent and this is why man needs
to create enough illusions and delusions to
survive but this should not be done at
somebody else’s expense.

The Reality of Our Existence

Our modern culture characterised by

toxic positivity and optimism bias often
overlooks and fails to acknowledge the
futility of life even though some of the
oldest and greatest philosophers have
mentioned it in their writings. From as early
as the poetic works of Gilgamesh and
Homer to the current postmodern era,
futility has been written and talked about as

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a part and parcel of life and the human

experience. In 2300 B.C. Gilgamesh
mentions “misery comes at last to the
healthy man; the end of life is sorrow.” In
480-405 B.C. during the time of Euripides
Hippolytus said “The life of mankind is full
of woe, with never a moment’s grace” and
“suffering for mortal’s is nature’s iron law.”
Socrates even said “Life is short, the art
long, opportunity fleeting, experience
treacherous, judgment difficult.” 65-8 B.C.
Odes mentions how “life’s short span
forbids us to enter on far-reaching hopes.” In
the first century B.C., in his poem
Sententiae, Publius Syrus wrote:

Death is fortunate for the child, bitter to the

youth, too late to the old.
Life is short in itself, but misfortune
makes it longer.
Formidable is the enemy that lurks in a
man’s breast.
Fortune is glass; just as it becomes bright
it is broken.
Fortune is never contented with hurting
anyone once.

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How many regrets does length of life

incur!
How tragic when reason is conquered by
chance!
Pain forces even the innocent to lie.
Lucky to die before you implore death to
come.
Calamity easily finds whomsoever it
seeks.
Even false becomes true when a superior
says so.
In 20 A.D. Manilius wrote “We begin to
die as soon as we are born, and the end is
linked to the beginning.”

Unpleasant Truths

Actor, poet and dramatic theorist,

Antonin Artaud 1896-1948 wrote:

"We are born rotten in the body and soul,

we are congenitally maladjusted; do away
with the opium, you will not do away with
the need for crime, cancers of the body and
soul, the propensity to despair, inborn
cretinism, hereditary syphilis, the instability
of the instincts, you will not prevent the fact

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that there are souls predestined for poison, in

whatever form - the poison of morphine, the
poison of reading, the poison of loneliness,
the poison of onanism, the poison of sexual
overindulgence, the poison of congenital
weakness of the soul, the poison of alcohol,
the poison of tobacco, the poison of anti-
sociability. Some souls are incurable and
lost to the rest of society. Deprive them of
one means of folly, they will invent ten
thousand others nature herself is
fundamentally antisocial, it is only by a
usurpation of powers that the organised
body of society opposes humanity's natural
inclination. For most are lost by nature, all
your ideas of moral regeneration will make
no difference, there is AN INNATE
DETERMINISM which is an undeniable
incurability in suicide, crime, idiocy,
madness there is an invincible cuckoldry in
man, there is a congenital weakness of the
character, a castration of the mind. Man is
miserable, the soul is weak, some men will
always destroy themselves. It matters little
how they do it. Destroy yourselves, you who
are desperate, and you who are tortured in
the body and soul, abandon all hope. There

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is no more solace for you in this world. The

world lives off your rotting flesh."

Acceptance of Futility For A Better

World

Futility is the most uncomfortable truth

anyone can ever bring themselves to accept,
but our knowledge, acceptance, and
embracement will lead to peace. When we
realise that as long as we exist in this life,
we are all losers, we begin to develop
compassion for one another, even our
parents. For example, the concepts of
colonialism, imperialism and war are futile
because we realise there are no real winners
and the battle is only worth fighting for the
sake of safeguarding your dignity and the
fate of the most vulnerable in your society.
However, conquest for land, resources and
spoils of war will lead to more unnecessary
burdens. This is why every great civilisation
which ever existed on the face of the earth
has eventually collapsed because the more
you acquire in life, the more burdens you
carry on your shoulders, whereas the less
you own the freer you tend to be.

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In his one of his video interviews,

Raphael Samuel, the man from India who
wanted to sue his parents for giving birth to
him without his consent, talked about the
importance of having a massive campaign to
rebrand the concept of death. Samuel has
said that the masses' consciousness seems to
carry a fearful perception of death that is
weaponised by those in power to exploit
people’s fear of the unknown. Instead,
people should be encouraged to live life to
the fullest and accept death as going hand in
hand with life. This will help people become
more rational in their attitude towards death
and this will be one of the key components
that will help set humanity free from the
negative ideological mindset associated with
death and dying.
In his masterpiece, “The Dark Side:
Thoughts on the Futility of Life From the
Ancient Greeks to the Present”, Alan R.
Pratt explains “There are over a thousand
quotes from nearly four hundred famous
writers, from antiquity to the present, who
assessed both mankind’s contingent nature
and the view that human existence is, at best,
amusingly trivial, or more likely,

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horrifyingly meaningless.” These quotations

often outrage many people because of the
social stigma and taboo of acknowledging
these harsh realities of life. We often resort
to self-destructive behaviours, instant
gratification, or escapism because of life's
pointlessness, boredom, and
meaninglessness.

In this chapter we explored some quotes

from Schopenhauer and other historical
figures that date as far back as the Gilgamesh
writings of Sumer which discuss the
meaninglessness and futility of life. We also
examine some other historical quotes and
discuss the importance of destigmatising and
making it socially acceptable to embrace
death and futility despite the fact these topics
outrages and enrage many people. The next
step is to explore the relationship between
narcissism and parenthood.

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CHAPTER SEVEN

Narcissism Masked As Altruism

“Abusive parents often blame their

children for their abusive and
immature behaviour as a way of
covering their tracks so they don’t
look bad. Toxic parents are the root
and cause of all dysfunctional
families because the fish rots first at
its head.”

― Trialsandtests.com

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In his underrated video titled “Are all

parents selfish narcissists?” Professor of
Psychology and world leading expert on
narcissism and the author of Malignant Self-
Love: Narcissism Revisited, Sam Vaknin
provides an interesting analysis on all
parents being selfish narcissists and he his
hypothesis refutes the idea of the selfish
gene in the following passage:

“The advent of cloning, sperm and

gamete donation and surrogate
motherhood have shaken the traditional
definition of parenthood to its
foundations. The social roles of parents
have similarly been recast by the decline of
the nuclear family and the surge in the
alternative household formats. So why do
we become parents in the first place? Do
we have a moral obligation to humanity at
large? To ourselves? To our unborn
children? Hardly so. Raising children
comprises equal measures of satisfaction
and frustration. Parents often employ
psychological defence mechanisms known
as cognitive dissonance to suppress the

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negative aspects of parenting and deny the

unpalatable fact that raising children is
time consuming, exhausting and strains
otherwise pleasurable, tranquil, functional
relationships to their limits. This is not to
mention that the gestational mother
experiences considerable discomfort, effort
and risk in the course of pregnancy and
childbirth. Parenting is an irrational
vocation yet humanity keeps breeding and
procreating. This may well be the call of
nature as everybody may think every
species may reproduce and many of them
parent. Is maternity and paternity proof
beneath the ephemeral veneer of
civilisation that we are still merely a kind
of animal, a beast subject to the impulses
and hardwired behaviour that permeate
the rest of the animal kingdom? In his
important book, The Selfish Gene,
Richard Dawkins suggested that we
copulate to preserve our genetic material
in a future gene pool survival whether in
the form of DNA or higher level of the
species determines our parenting instinct
breeding and nurturing the young, mere,
safe contact mechanisms handing the

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precious cargo of genetics down of

organic containers known as children. Yet
surely to ignore the epistemological and
legalities of parenthood is misleadingly
reductionist. Moreover, Dawkins commits
scientific faux pa of teleology, nature has
no purpose in mind, because nature has
no mind, stints simply are in nature. There
is no goal, no plan, no masterplan. The
genes end up being forwarded in time does
not entail that nature or God planned it
this way. Countless philosophies have long
and convincingly refuted arguments from
design. Human beings as opposed to
nature act instinctively, so we are back to
square one. Why bring children to the
world and burden ourselves with decades
of commitment to perfect strangers? Well
here is a hypothesis for you. Offspring
allow us to delay death, postpone to
procrastinate our progeny are the medium
through which our genetic material is
propagated and immortalised.
Additionally, by remembering that our
children keep us alive after physical death,
these are self-delusional, self-serving
delusions. Our genetic material amounts

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to 50% in the first generation and is

diluted over time. It amounts to a measly
6% 3 generations later. If the
everlastingness of one’s unadulterated
DNA was the paramount concern, incest
would have been the norm not
outbreeding. As for one’s enduring
memory via the generations lets go
through a simple exercise. Can you
remember or can you name your maternal
or paternal great great great grandfather?
Of course you cannot because our memory
vanishes within 3-4 generations.
Intellectual feats or architectural
monuments are more potent mementos of
our existence than children. Still, well, we
have been so indoctrinated that children
equal immortality, this misconception
yields a baby boom in each post-war
period having been existentially
threatened. People multiply and procreate
in the vain belief that they best protect
their genetic heritage and memory. So let’s
study a more rational and grounded
explanation – utilitarian view is that one’s
offspring are an asset, kind of pension and
insurance policy rolled into one. Children

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are still treated as a yielding property in

many parts of the world. They plough
fields, they do menial jobs very effectively,
people hatch their bets by bringing
multiple copies of themselves to the world.
Indeed, as infant mortality plunges in the
better educated, higher income parts of the
world, so does fecundity. The richer we
are, the more educated we are, the more
wealthy we are, the fewer children we
have. In the Western world though
children have long ceased be a profitable
proposition. At present they are more of a
drag and economic liability. Many
continue to live with their parents into
their 30s and consume family savings in
college tuition, subtorus weddings, special
divorces and parasitic habits.
Alternatively, increasing mobility breaks
families apart at an early stage. Anyway,
children are no longer the flounce of
emotional sustenance and monetary
support they allegedly used to be in
previous generations. Procreation serves
to preserve the cohesiveness of the family
nucleus, it further bonds father to mother
and strengthens the ties between siblings

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or is it the other way around? A cohesive

and warm family is conducive to
reproduction either way they seem to be
connected, functional families and
reproduction and of course both
statements are false. Stable and functional
families sport far fewer children than
abnormal or dysfunctional families – it is
a fact. Between 1/3 and ½ of children are
born in single parent or non-traditional,
non-nuclear, poor or undereducated
family households. Such children are born
unwanted and unwelcome. The set
outcome of accidents, mishaps, ignorance,
lack of fertility planning, lust gone rye,
misguided sequence of events. The more
sexually active people are, the less safe
their desirous exploits, the more likely they
will end up with a bundle of joy. Many
children result from sexual ignorance, bad
timing and a vigorous and undisciplined
sexual drive amongst teenagers, the poor,
the less educated, the mentally ill and the
dysfunctional. Still, most people want their
kids and love them, they are attached to
their kids and experience grief and
bereavement when their children die, drift

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apart or are sick. Most parents find

parenthood emotionally fulfilling,
happiness inducing and highly satisfying.
This pertains even to unplanned and
unwanted new arrivals. Could this be the
missing link? Do fatherhood and
motherhood revolve around self-
gratification? Does it all boil down to the
pleasure principle? Child rearing may
indeed be habit forming. 9 months of
pregnancy and a host of positive social
reinforcements and expectations cannot
condition parents to do the job. Still a
living tot is nothing like the abstract
concept. Babies cry, they soil themselves
and their environment, they stink, and
they severely disrupt their parents' lives.
There is nothing too enticing in an infant
objectively speaking. Once spawns are a
risky invention. So many things can go
wrong, so many expectations and dreams
are realised, so much pain is inflicted on
the parents and then the child runs off and
his procreators are left to face the empty
nest. The emotional returns on a child
rarely are commensurate with a
magnitude of the investment if you

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eliminate the impossible said Sherlock

Holmes, whatever is left however
improbable must be the truth. People
multiply because it provides them with
narcissistic supply. The narcissist is a
person who projects a false image unto
others and uses the interest this projection
generates to regulate a labarum and
grandiose sense of self-worth. The
reactions guarded by the narcissist,
tension, unconditional acceptance,
adulation, admiration, and affirmation are
collectively known as narcissistic supply.
The narcissist objectifies people and treats
them as mere instruments of gratification
to be idealised, used, abused and
discarded. Infants go through a phase of
unbridled fantasy. Tyrannical behaviour
and perceived omnipotence an adult
narcissist in other words is still stuck in
his terrible twos and is possessed with the
emotional maturity of a toddler. To some
degree, we are all narcissists, yet we learn
to empathise and love ourselves and others
as we grow. We grow out of our primary
narcissism, we do not develop what Freud
called secondary, malignant, pathological

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narcissism but narcissists do. They are

stuck in a time warp – they have never
grown up. This edifice of maturity is
severely tested by new found parenthood.
Babies evoke in the parent the most
primordial drives, protective, animalistic
instincts, the desire to merge with the new-
born and a sense of terror generated by
such a desire. It’s a fear of vanishing and
being in their parents and emotional
regression. Their parents find themselves
revisiting in their child their childhoods
through and via the infant, even as they
are caring for the new-born. The
crumbling of decades and layers of
personal growth is accompanied by a
resurgence of early infantile narcissistic
defences mentioned above. Parents,
especially new ones are gradually
transformed into narcissists by this
encounter with a new-born. They find in
their children the perfect sources of
narcissistic supply euphemistically known
as “love”. So parenthood, childrearing,
caring for children, caregiving, these are
all forms of symbolic co-dependence of
both parties, the child provides narcissistic

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supply, the burnt parent consumes it. Even

the most balanced both mature or most
psycho-dynamically stable parents find
such a flood of narcissistic supply
emanating from the child irresistible and
addictive. Such supply enhances the
parents self-confidence, buttresses his or
her self-esteem, regulates the sense of self-
worth and projects a complementarian
image of the parent onto himself or
herself. So this interaction is so addictive
that it quickly becomes indispensable,
especially in the emotionally vulnerable
position in which the parents find
themselves reawakening all the unresolved
conflicts that she had with her parents.
What if this theory of parenthood as
narcissism is true, if breathing is merely
about securing prime quality narcissistic
supply then the higher the self-confidence,
the self-esteem, the self-worth of the
parent, the clearer and more realistic is
self-image, the more abundant his other
sources of narcissistic supply, the fewer
children such a parent will have and these
predictions are born out of reality.
Educated, high income, high self-esteem,

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self-confident people have few or no

children. The higher the education and
income of adults and consequently the
firmer their sense of self-worth, the fewer
children they have, that is statistical law.
Children are perceived as
counterproductive by these people. Not
only is their output narcissistic supply,
redundant, they hinder the parents
professional and pecuniary progress and
the parents liberty and freedom. The more
children people can economically afford,
the fewer they have. This gives the lie to
the selfish gene hypothesis, the more
educated people are, the more they know
about the world, about themselves and the
less they seek to procreate. The more
advanced a civilisation, the more efforts it
invests in preventing children's birth. In
Western civilisation, we spend billions of
dollars preventing pregnancy or aborting
foetuses, contraceptives and family
planning and abortions are typical of
affluent, well-informed society, not the
poor. Once more plentiful the narcissistic
supply afforded by other sources, the
lesser the emphasis on breeding. Freud

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described the mechanism of sublimation,

the sex drive, the eros, the libido can be
converted, sublimated into other types of
activities all the sublimity channels,
politics and art for instance are
narcissistic supply, they render children
unnecessary and superfluous. Creative
people have fewer children than the
average or none at all. This is because
they are narcissistically self-sufficient.
They know how to generate their
narcissistic supply. They don’t need
children to give them narcissistic supply.
They have enough. The key to our
determination to have children seems to be
our wish to experience the same
unconditional love we received or are
supposed to have received from our
mothers. This intoxicating brew and
feeling of being adored for what we are
with no limits, reservations or
calculations. This kind of love, this kind of
laser focused attention… it’s the most
powerful, crystallised form of narcissistic
supply. A child’s love nourishes our self-
love, our self-worth, our self-confidence. It
infuses us with feelings of omnipotence

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and omniscience in these respects

parenthood is a return to infancy, it is a
type of narcissistic defence mechanism.”

An Instrument of Gratification

In his manifesto titled “The Art of

Guillotining Procreators: An Anti-Natalist
Manifesto, in section titled Posture iii
Mobiles and Real Mechanisms of
Procreation Theophile de Giraud describes
“progenitors as narcissistically imbued with
themselves” and goes on to remind us that
the term “baby is derived directly from the
Latin word Pupa which means nothing but a
doll.” From examining this etymology we
realise how much the concept of parenthood
dehumanises children and reduces them to a
doll or as Vaknin would describe “a mere
instrument of gratification.” Similarly, Freud
described “parental love as narcissistic.” De
Giraud describes parents as exhibitionists
who parade their children around foolishly to
attract attention from admirers foolishly
enjoying special societal privileges because
of their young offspring.

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Narcissism & Parenthood Go Hand in

Hand

If one were to clone themselves, cover the

entirety of their walls with pictures of
themselves or have a life sized doll made in
their image, those actions would be called
vain, narcissistic and self-absorbed.
Progenitors commit far worse atrocities by
gambling with the lives of their mini-me
lookalikes carrying their prized genetic
material without their consent and it is
celebrated with ignorance and pure
obliviousness to the suffering of their
offspring. If we go around worshipping other
human beings, it is called idolatry, which is a
major sin in all Abrahamic religions, yet
even with the imbalanced power dynamic,
we are taught to blindly worship our parents
and society turns a blind eye to this.
Narcissism is supposedly frowned upon as a
mental illness, but even progenitors do not
deny that their procreation action is
narcissism. Published in Psychology Today,
in her article titled “The Essential
Narcissism of Parenthood” Barb Cohen
states:

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“Parents are wired to look at their

babies as mirrors of their more perfect
selves. We cannot eliminate this primal
feeling, but we can manage it so that
our children thrive. So being a
narcissistic parent is normal and
natural. But the impulse must be kept
in check.”

Society Needs To Exploit & Deceive

Children To Survive

The internet is inundated with information

and resources on the harmful impacts of
having a narcissistic parent on child
development, trauma, attachment styles, and
future interpersonal relationships. Although
cloning a mini-me version of yourself with
50% of your DNA is described by society as
“altruistic, selfless, sacrificial and
meaningful”. In contrast, childfree people are
described by society as “selfish, hedonistic,
lazy and narcissistic” the evidence points to
the contrary. Children do not need to be born
nor do they need to exist and society has
spent millennia of lifetimes indoctrinating

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people to believe this myth to preserve itself

at the expense of children. Which is why we
must always remind ourselves, that if you
repeat a lie enough times, it will never
become the truth. Similarly, you can try to
suppress the greatest truths through millennia
of propaganda, religious indoctrination,
oppressing an entire gender, societal
pressure, brute force and misleading
misinformation. However, the truth will
always be the truth and these realities will
manifest as the gigantic elephants in plain
sight of every room.

In his book, “The Conquest of

Happiness”, Bertrand Russell said
“Relations between parents and children are,
in nine out of ten cases, a source of misery
for both parties and, in 99 cases out of a
hundred, a source of misery for at least one
of the parts.” For society to remain
functional, social norms of being subservient
to your parents were required to maintain
peace but the question remains where do we
draw the line between harmony, respect (or
lack thereof) and balance? The first step
begins with acknowledging that our parents

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made selfish “sacrifices” that benefitted

themselves to bring us into this world.
According to society, the first people who
bully us into submission to their authority
and societal norms are our parents, and we
are supposed to be grateful for this. But often
society’s demands are unreasonable,
especially those that are dogmatic and take it
as far as ancestor worship.

This chapter explored a well-written

comprehensive piece from Prof. Sam
Vaknin challenging the selfish gene
hypothesis and concluding all parents are
narcissists. We also touched on how
narcissism dehumanises children and how
parenthood glorifies ego through
fetishisation and exhibitionism of children
for narcissistic supply. We also explored
how society needs to exploit the imbalanced
power dynamic between parents and
children to function. The next step going
forward is to explore how to redefine the
relationship between parents and their
children and recreate a more balanced power
structure favouring the children, which we
shall explore in the next chapter.

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 CHAPTER EIGHT

Why They Deserve No Glory

“All parents damage their children. It
cannot be helped. Youth, like pristine
glass, absorb the prints of its handlers.
Some parents smudge, others crack, a few
shatter childhoods completely into jagged
little pieces, beyond repair.”

― Mitch Albom
 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

As mentioned in previous chapters,
society glorifies and worships parents by
placing them on pedestals and glamourising
them. This chapter explores why parents
deserve no glory because the relationship
between parents and children is imbalanced,
predatory and parents have more to gain
from their children than vice versa. It is a
relationship reliant on social coercion,
manipulation and deception because
natalists put something they supposedly
“love” in harm’s way. Moreover, anyone
can become a parent, it is not an
achievement or accomplishment. To quote
one person on Twitter who said “children
are trophies of their parents functioning
genitals.” Hence, the relationship between
parents and children is one of Stockholm
Syndrome for survival.
The relationship between children and
parents is already asymmetric because
parents already have advantages over their
children due to age, status and wealth.
Parents often use these things as leverage in
their children’s lives to obtain more from

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them later on in life. Children provide for all

their parents superficial desires such as
status, satisfying their needs for narcissistic
supply and catering to their social and
emotional needs while parents do the bare
minimum to reciprocate by only meeting
children’s basic needs. Yet, society
manipulates children into believing that they
owe their parents everything to bring them
into this world.
In an article titled “People Share What
Made them Lose Respect For their Parents”
Veracia Ankrah outlines the older people
get, the more you realise your parents are
grown children trying to figure out life as
they go along. In this article people share
examples of how their parents fought over
winning board games, parents maxing out
their children’s credit cards, parents using
their children as ammunition to heart each
other and even parents going as far as
disrespecting their adult children to try and
feel better about themselves. In addition to
parents who hoard, tell lies, steal from
charity, bribe their children, guilt trip their
children, engage in road rage and throw
temper tantrums. One can argue parents are

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only human, but it is indeed hard to respect

your parents as you get older and begin to
notice their flaws. The case is different if
you learn to view your parents as people
rather than authority figures. If they are
decent human beings they are worthy of that
basic respect.

Criticism of “Respect Your Elders”

In an article critiquing “respecting your

elders”, the author, Wylor-Owen, explains
that before the internet and widespread
access to education, we had to rely on our
elders knowledge and experience to learn
essential life skills. Hence, we have become
less reliant on our elders to learn what we
need to know in life. The biggest criticisms
against unconditional compliance are there
are plenty of evil people, no one should
respect who are elders – this includes
criminals, paedophiles and other predatory
people. Not all adults deserve respect,
outdated norms are exploited to excuse and
provide an illusion of authority to have
things at other people’s expense. In another
article titled “Why You Shouldn’t Respect

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Your Elders” the author explains respect and

age do not go hand in hand, respect is earned
just like trust and elders should not be
respected just because of their age, but
rather they should be respected as human
beings unless they give you a reason not to
respect them.

Social Coercion

Parental respect results from social

coercion, which manifests directly and
indirectly. In her article, “Social Coercion:
A Discussion” Skylar Collins explains
“social coercion is often overlooked,
typically non-physically-violent social
means which a person or people try to get
people to conform to the majority will or
will of another to suppress individual rights.
Typically at its core is similar to peer
pressure of the schoolyard applied to the
adult world.” Social coercion is a way for
society to manipulate and control people by
social means such as ostracising and
shaming them. Social coercion has been
described as “violence of the mind, soul and
spirit”. There is an unspoken rule to obey

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and respect our parents, whether explicitly

or implicitly, directly or indirectly, without
questions blind obedience to them.

Stockholm Syndrome

Many people have compared the parent-

child relationship to Classic Stockholm
Syndrome evolutionarily designed by nature
for our survival. To quote my friend Antoine
Sugar, “according to antinatalist philosophy,
parents are kidnappers, slave traders,
murderers, torturers and enslavers. By
forcing us into existence, our parents have
committed every known criminal act against
the new born including rape, theft,
imprisonment, brainwashing, oppression and
exploitation all forced on the child, who is a
defenceless, helpless being at the mercy of
its captors.” According to an article
published in Medium by Matt Pusateri,
“Classic Stockholm Syndrome refers to “a
psychological phenomenon in which
hostages express empathy and sympathy and
have positive feelings toward their captors,
sometimes to the point of defending and
identifying with the captors.” It was inspired

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by a Stockholm bank robbery in 1973,

during which hostages inside the bank
gradually came to defend the criminals who
took them hostage.”
In her article “A look at Stockholm
Syndrome, Child Abuse, & Toxic
Relationships”, Professor of Sociology, Erin
Fado explains that Stockholm Syndrome
(SS) can also be found in family, romantic,
and interpersonal relationships. She says the
abuser may be a parent or child, in which the
abuser is in a position of control or authority
and once the syndrome is understood, it’s
easier to understand why victims support,
love, and even defend their abusers and
controllers. If we compare the symptoms or
behaviours between Stockholm Syndrome
and the Child/Parent relationship we will
find there are many similarities such as:

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According to Fado, “four situations or

conditions are present that serve as a
foundation for the development of
Stockholm Syndrome. These four situations
can be found in hostage, severe abuse, and
abusive relationships. There are also similar
parallels between the parent-child
relationship which include:

§ There is a perceived threat to

one’s physical or psychological

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

survival and the belief that the abuser

would carry out the threat.
§ The presence of a perceived
small kindness from the abuser to the
victim
§ Isolation from perspectives
other than those of the abuser
§ The perceived inability to
escape the situation
§ Perceived Threat to One’s
Physical/Psychological Survival

The perception of threat can be formed

by direct, indirect, or witnessed methods.
Criminal or antisocial partners (or parents)
can directly threaten your life or the life of
friends and family. Their history of violence
leads us to believe that the captor/controller
will carry out the threat in a direct manner if
we fail to comply with their demands. The
abuser assures us that only our cooperation
keeps our loved one’s safe.”

Trauma Bonding

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Trauma Bonding and Stockholm

Syndrome are often used interchangeably.
Repeated cycles of abuse lead to trauma
bonding and there are three main stages in
the cycle of abuse: honeymoon, tension and
explosion phases.

The honeymoon phase involves being

hopeful, relieved, sceptical, confused,
needing time to heal, knowing it is not
genuine, feeling connected to the parents
and enjoying a break. The tension phase
involves feeling withdrawn, anxious,

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isolated, trying hard to please, frustrated,

angry, feeling like a fool, or afraid of doing
the wrong thing. The explosion phase
involves trying protect one’s self, suffering
physical injuries, giving into the parents’
wishes, feeling trapped, degraded, terrified,
guilty and yelling back. Signs of a trauma
bond are cyclical nature, power imbalance
and addiction to dopamine and oxytocin all
of which align similarly between parent-
child relationships. Our dependence on
hormones, chemicals, social, economic and
survival needs place us in a vulnerable
position when it comes to the relationships
with our parents.

Adult Children Abandon Their

Parents

According to a website called, Estranged

Stories, adult children estrangement is very
common and many children only remain in
contact with their parents out of moral
obligation or guilt. It is symbolic of breaking
free from Stockholm Syndrome parent-child
archetypal relationship. Adult children have
cited lack of respect, love, support,

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dysfunction, past abuse, disrespect of the

adult child’s spouse, refusal to apologise,
being overbearing and undermining, playing
favourites among siblings and ignoring
boundaries as reasons children abandon their
parents. Many adult children describe their
relationships with their parents as “not
close”. According to a British survey,
children are the ones who usually initiate no
contact. When parents were asked about the
estrangement, nearly 75% for both daughters
and sons initiated no contact. Other reasons
for estrangement include disputes over
money, terrible parenting, infantilising,
differences in values, toxicity and divorce.
Over 60% of children in the study had said
they were pessimistic about the likelihood of
reconciling with their estranged parents.
As we explored in the previous chapter, it
is difficult to separate parenthood from
narcissism. Our reliance on our parents for
survival makes us establish a Stockholm
Syndrome type of relationship built on
repetitive cycles of trauma bonding. If it
were not for traditions such as “respect your
elders”, “obey your parents” and social
coercion we would not have much respect

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

for our parents; especially when we realise

the nature of our relationship which is an
unpleasant revelation but an inevitability in
particularly in our most formative years to
enable our survival. Instead of being taught
to respect your parents out of fear and a
“need” to obey them, children should
instead be encouraged to view their parents
and all other grownups as equals who
happen to be older and have more life
experiences than them. Respect should be
reciprocal, earned, and given based on
demonstrating decency as a human being
rather than a figure of authority we need to
depend on for our livelihood and survival.
In the next chapter and part three we
examine how to move forward now that we
are aware of the archetype of the parent-
child relationship. We will discuss why we
have no obligations but our parents have
their obligations towards us and how we
owe them nothing from bringing us into this
subpar existence that was forcefully
imposed on us against our will. This will
enable us to further examine why we should
break the cycle and find other ways to make

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our lives more meaningful which we will

explore further in the upcoming chapters.

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 Part 3 – Moving Forward

CHAPTER NINE

No Obligations, But Their Obligations

“Saying no can be the ultimate self-

care.”

― Claudia Black
 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

In many cultures, society likes to remind

us that we owe our parents everything in life
for bringing us into this world without our
consent while conveniently pardoning our
parents as though meeting our basic needs
means we owe them everything in life for
the “gift” of our existence. Being born of
needs means our parents need to meet a
myriad of our requirements to provide
sustenance to ensure we survive our
existence. As our parents age, we are taught
to reciprocate these filial obligations which
illustrates our existence means we are born
into a cycle of debt. This means all future
generations are constantly in debt to their
parents.
This chapter aims to explore why we
should break this cycle of debt because it is
cowardice, cheap and deceptive to impose
debts of previous generations onto future
generations. Insisting life is a gift is a
perverted coercion designed to impose a
narrative of constant deficit paving the way
for collective enslavement. This concept of
debt needs to be challenged, redefined and
corrected to ensure more people are not
needlessly dragged into this universe of

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forced suffering and enslavement. Hence,

the relationship between parents and their
children is of a creditor and debtor and this
expands further onto society as a whole.

5 Model Theories of Filial Obligations

According to philosophy author, Brynn

Welch, there are five different model
theories of filial obligations to be considered
which require children to be responsible for
the kind of care they provide to their ageing
parents. These theories are Debt Theory,
Friendship Theory, Gratitude Theory,
Special Goods Theory and Gratitude for
Special Goods Theory.

The Debt Theory

The Debt Theory proposes that filial

obligations are non-voluntary and owed to
people one has a relationship with which
believes if our parents fed, clothed, sheltered
us we are morally obligated to serve them
unless the parent releases the child from the
debt. In this model children are seen as
“investments” and this is stressed by

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historical figures such as Confucius,

Aristotle and Thomas Aquinas who use the
language of debt repayment when discussing
parent-child relations.

The Friendship & Other Theories

Jane English proposed the Friendship

Theory based on love and voluntary
friendship. Critiques of this model believe
that this relationship is undesirable because
both parties are not equal and lack sufficient
independence to be equals. The Gratitude
Theory believes one owes gratitude to their
parents so as not to undermine mutual
respect relationships. Unlike debt
repayment, these obligations are not set in
stone and are much more flexible. Critiques
of this theory believe children owe their
parents a lot more for their sacrifices that go
beyond gratitude. The Special Goods theory
has three conditions: a parent needs some
special good, the parent has provided or
currently provides special goods to the child
and the child can provide the special good
that the parent needs and the child needs to
provide the special good to the parent.

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Brynn Welch developed the Gratitude for

Special Goods Theory which states: “The
obligations of gratitude to provide special
goods to one’s parent so long as the
following four conditions are satisfied:
• The parent needs some special good.
• The child can position herself to
provide the good.
• The parent has provided and/or
currently provides special goods to the child.
• Expressing gratitude by providing
the special good the parent needs would not
undermine the mutual respect on which
moral relationships are based.”

This theory is relatively new so there has

not been any criticism.

Compassion With Boundaries/Limits

I propose a new model for filial

obligations where we abolish them in turn
for a new model called "compassion with
boundaries" where we have compassion for
our parents, but we decide what we owe
them in terms of obligations without the
shame and social stigma if we decide we

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owe them nothing. The objective is to

change the culture around child-parental
relationships to a more egalitarian
relationship and remove the unbalanced
power dynamic. This can only be achieved if
parenthood is no longer glorified and
parental worship and filial piety are
abolished. Once people can see that a true
person who loves children refrains from
putting them in harm’s way and favours the
child's best interests over their self-interests
by choosing not to bring them into this
world. This will eventually create a new
paradigm shift around the filial piety and
obligations culture.

Saying “No” To Your Family

Published in the website, Kindling Zing,

in their article titled “You Don’t Owe Your
Parents Anything: Saying “No” to Family”
the author outlines the importance of not
feeling guilty for saying no to parents even
if it upsets them. The article explains the
importance of remembering you are an
individual, your parents chose to have you,
nobody chooses to be born and you do not

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

owe your parents money for their expenses

in taking care of you. It goes on to explain
the importance of learning to set healthy
boundaries by being honest and clear about
your feelings, not apologising, taking time
alone if needed, offering an alternative
solution and expressing gratitude.

Duty & Debt To Society

I have often heard people say that having

children is a duty one must fulfil to
contribute to society which means before we
are in debt to our parents our parents are in
debt to society. I tried very hard to find
where this concept originated from without
any luck, however, from my understanding
this means because we are brought into this
world and nurtured by our parents and wider
society, therefore we owe them and must
pay back the debt or pay it forward by
contributing our genes into the wider gene
pool. It appears that contributing your genes
to the next generation is rooted in statism
and organised religion.

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Pope Francis has labelled childfree

couples as ‘selfish’ about the above subject
matter. Furthermore, he insisted ‘A society
with a greedy generation that doesn’t want
to surround itself with children, that
considers them above all worrisome, a
weight, a risk, is a depressed society.’ Some
philosophers such as Elizabeth Anscombe
and Alastair Norcross have raised questions
about whether this idea makes any sense.
The Pope’s ideas are very archaic and rely
on making procreation a moral requirement
and using shame and guilt to coerce women
into becoming baby making machines which
is very demanding and intrusive. This idea
also relies on giving up one’s life and
autonomy to “pay it forward” to society. The
problem with this is the limitations of how
we can “pay it forward” – we can pay it
forward with acts of altruism and kindness
that do not require us to give up our lives
and autonomy. One must also ask is adding
one extra person to the world, really paying
it forward? One can argue that not
procreating is a positive contribution to the
world, especially overpopulated world.
Children also conflict with work and the

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

decline of marriage means less people will

have children which means people have
more time to offer a lot more to society
besides having children.

In this chapter we explored the history of

parental debt and the debt to society along
with various models of filial obligations. We
also proposed a new model of compassion
with boundaries for our parents. In the next
chapter and part three we examine reasons
why it is important to break the cycle of
procreation for a myriad of reasons such as
consent, genetic determinism and for
reasons such as avoiding dragging more
children to suffer in the dystopian world that
we are living in.

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 CHAPTER TEN

Why You Should Break The Cycle

“Bringing a child into a world of disease

and suffering ought to be a criminal
offence.”

― Brian Aldridge
 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

As aforementioned in previous chapters,

there are many reasons not to procreate, the
main reasons being the inability to obtain
consent from children, the human rights
violations procreation entails and the
concern with following the herd mentality.
Among other reasons includes enslavement,
overpopulation, environmental catastrophes,
future wars, poverty, social ills, futility and
narcissism among many other reasons. The
first step to breaking a cycle lies in knowing
that having children is morally wrong and it
is important to understand the ramifications
of having children. It is also important to
conduct a personal experiment where you
babysit or foster children and decide if being
a parent is for you. As someone who has
previously worked with severely autistic
children in mental health and disability
services, I strong recommend working as a
support worker in a high stress job to help
you make your decision. If you love
children, you can even volunteer or work at
a day-care centre to realise how challenging
parenthood is. If you decide you would like

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to proceed in parenting, consider fostering

or adoption before having your biological
children, especially if you have hereditary
diseases. Although the policies and
procedures concerning adoption can be
strenuous, bureaucratic and somewhat strict,
adoption is the more ethical route of
parenting than having biological children.
The key is to consider adoption as a unique
experience that positively contributes to
society and the rest of the world with 153
million orphans. Knowing what this world is
like, the only parents who deserve to be
truly honored are adopted and foster parents
who choose to be part of the solution rather
than contribute to the problem.

Accountability

In the current system parents are rarely

held accountable for how their children turn
out. The truth is there are many factors at
play here that are beyond the parents ability
to control. One can have a child but one can
only guarantee they will taste death one day.
In today’s fast paced world many parents
lack time or financial resources to raise

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children to be healthy, well balanced adults.

According to a parenting website, 5
important factors influence development
milestones in children influenced by
genetics that are largely random,
deterministic and beyond our control. The
most important factor in child development
is a strong familial bond that many families
lack. Many parents use technology as a
substitute for spending quality time with
their children, which impacts the child’s
development. Other important factors
include mental health, environmental
influences and health and nutrition.
Some important statistics strongly
correlate with parental neglect and abuse
that society often overlooks are rooted in the
wrong people choosing to become parents.
If we take the United States as a case study,
according to government statistics “4.4
million child maltreatment referral reports
received are received every year and child
abuse reports involve 7.9 million children.
91.4% of victims are maltreated by one or
both parents and only 3.4 million
children received prevention & post-
response services. 142,056

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children received foster care services,

491,710 victims (74.9%) are neglected,
115,100 victims (17.5%) are physically
abused, 60,927 victims (9.3%) are sexually
abused and 39,824 victims (6.1%)
are psychologically maltreated. The highest
rate of child abuse in children under age
one (25.7 per 1,000). Annual estimate: 1,840
children died from abuse and neglect in
2019. Five children die every day from child
abuse. Seventy (70.3%) percent of all child
fatalities were younger than 3 years old.
79.7% of child fatalities involve at least one
parent, of the children who died, 72.9%
suffered child neglect and of the children
who died, 44.4% suffered physical
abuse either exclusively or in combination
with another maltreatment type. 45.4% of
children who die from child abuse are under
one year. Boys had a higher child fatality
rate than girls (2.98 boys & 2.20 girls per
100,000 and almost 61,000 children
are sexually abused. 2018 was the first year
for which states report the new maltreatment
type of sex trafficking. For 2019, 29 states
report 877 unique victims of sex trafficking.
For victims of the sex

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trafficking maltreatment type, the majority

(89.1%) are female and 10.4 percent
are male. It is estimated that between 50-
60% of maltreatment fatalities are not
recorded on death certificates. Child abuse
crosses all socioeconomic and educational
levels, religions, and ethnic and cultural
groups. 14% of all men in prison and 36% of
women in prison in the USA were abused as
children, about twice the frequency seen in
the general population. Children who
experience child abuse and neglect
are approximately 9 times more likely to
become involved in criminal activity.”

Social Responsibility

Every child is a by-product of their

environment. It is becoming increasingly
harder to provide for children and meet their
basic needs. As a children’s rights advocacy
movement, antinatalism is about prevention
rather than cure. Whether we like it or not
we are socially responsible for contributing
to the earth. Did the mothers of serial killers
and world dictators anticipate their children
will wreak havoc on the planet or did they

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assume their miracle baby would grow up to

cure cancer? Our legacies are what we leave
behind for the world to face. According to
Radhe Gupta, the crime rates are increasing
worldwide as people are struggling
financially due to high unemployment rates,
rising inflation, and inability to meet basic
expenses. Theft, burglary and dealing illegal
substances are rising because people
struggle to provide for their families. In her
post “What Kids Need to Grow Up Healthy,
Successful and Happy” Ronit Baras outlines
that children need attention, physical touch,
unconditional love, good role models,
boundaries, consistency, freedom, to know
they are special, friends, and the need to
express themselves. It is becoming
increasingly difficult to meet those needs
while families struggle to raise their children
on two incomes.
I was told by many people growing up
that their parents never even talked to them,
they would just come home from work and
ignore them. This contributes to many
children having attachment issues and
difficulties forming relationships. Adult
attachment theories refers to various

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difficulties associated with reading

emotions, showing affection, and trusting
others. These disorders often start in
childhood, affecting everything from
someone’s self-esteem to relationship
satisfaction. According to psychologists,
there is a strong correlation between severe
attachment disorders and conduct-disordered
behaviours that contribute to antisocial
personality disorder development. The
violence among these children continues to
rise and there is a significant risk of
committing serious offences and disordered
attachment is at the root of it all. The most
common causes of attachment disorder are
abuse, neglect, the foster-care system and
other prolonged separations from their
primary attachment figure. Risk factors
include abuse, neglect, domestic, poverty,
substance abuse, history of child abuse in
parents’ childhoods, depression and other
serious psychological disorder of parents.
Whether we accept or deny it, it takes a
village to raise a child and every criminal is
a by-product of society. Instead of sweeping
these problems under the rug, we need to
confront them head on and make a

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conscious decision to be socially responsible

as a collective to our contribution to these
problems that we often distance ourselves
and stray away from.

Dystopian Era

We live in a world of censorship, cancel

culture, forced vaccinations, and a big
brother surveillance state where jobs are not
guaranteed for future generations and a mass
depopulation agenda is underway. George
Orwell’s 1984 and Aldous Huxley’s Brave
New World have become self-fulfilling
prophecies that affect everybody
universally. We live in a survival of the
fittest reality. In his article, A Brave New
Dystopia Chris Hedges explains how we
have descended into a corporate totalitarian
state dominated by a repressive surveillance
and security state that uses a combination of
infotainment, spectacle captivated
technology and mass consumption to keep
the masses entranced. We live in a world
where we are seduced and manipulated
through sensual gratification, cheap mass-
produced goods, boundless credit, political

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theatre and amusement. What is the point of

contributing your genes to suffer in a
dystopian world of uncertainty? Some may
argue this attitude is defeatist and we should
fight back, but is the war worth it if our
opponents are far more powerful and
stronger than us?

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

Reasons To Be An Antinatalist

In my essay titled “Why I am an

Antinatalist” I cite many reasons for my
choice to not bring children into this world.

Primary Reasons I’m an Antinatalist

1. Consent

Children cannot consent to being born

and I have no right to make the most
important decision of somebody else’s life
on their behalf. Absolutely nothing I do for
the child will ever justify bringing them into
this world without their consent. In her
book, Every Cradle is a Grave, Sarah Perry
references a study done asking children,
even those of higher socioeconomic status
who are privileged if they’d rather be born
or not, and most said, they would rather
have never been born. I have asked many
people if they’d rather be born or not, and
most have said they would prefer not to have
been born into this world, so I can safely
assume that my unborn children would most

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probably want to be born either. If we ask

ourselves objectively “what is this world?”
and take a long hard look at the many
problems in the world, it’s not hard to
choose non-existence where there is peace
and no burden of suffering or existence over
this world. Furthermore, given the mess we
have made, why should our children be
forced to clean up the mess we and other
generations before us made? Don’t they
deserve a clean slate or a blank canvas to
paint the world the way they wish for it to
be?

2. Genetic Lottery

Procreation is a game of probability,

randomness and genetic determinism
beyond one’s control. There is no way of
determining the outcome or result. Knowing
what I know about the world's aesthetic
beauty and good health will determine my
child’s place in this world. Physical looks
matter far more than we think. But there is
still no guarantee the child will win the
genetic lottery. As I have mentioned in my
other posts, schizophrenia, bipolar disorder,

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autism spectrum disorder and cluster b

disorders run in my family, and the
probability of my children inheriting those
disorders is quite high. Most of these
disorders were inherited from my paternal
grandmother whose genes are very
prominent in the family (although some of
my cousins have been fortunate enough to
not inherit these disorders). In a nutshell,
playing the genetic lottery is far worse than
stealing somebody’s fortune and then going
to the pokies machine to “try my luck”, see
if I win anything (a trophy child) and the
final result (is most likely a loss) the child
incurs at their own expense.

3. Uncertainty & No
Guarantees Except Death

The only thing I can guarantee my

children is that one day they will die. Even if
I have money and connections to give them
the best possible life, I cannot guarantee
anything to them or even for myself. They
could have an accident that leads them to be
paralysed or I could lose my fortune, and
they may end up living a low-quality life

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with subpar living conditions. Ultimately,

they must suffer because of my short-
sightedness, narrowmindedness, narrow
vision, and my choice to play Russian
Roulette with their life. Perhaps there will be
a natural disaster or catastrophe, an
economic collapse, war, or a zombie
apocalypse that will have a devastating
impact on their life. I know so many people
who have suffered from tragedies that have
destroyed their lives – a family friend had
their son die in a mass shooting in a mosque,
a friend’s daughter suddenly developed
stage 4 cancer, and many bombs were
dropped over the homes of many of my
relatives in a war nobody expected would
happen. None of the parents of anybody I
know could guarantee their children “a good
life,” and for that reason, suffering is
inevitable. Furthermore, suffering far
outweighs pleasure, and pleasure is
sometimes a temporary absence of ongoing
suffering.

4. Economic
Enslavement (State Cattle)

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Most people are oblivious that a birth

certificate represents a legal agreement
between our parents and the state that we are
raised by our parents and owned by the
state. As soon as we are born, we are
assigned a social security number by the tax
department, and we are pressured to be
enrolled in schools (indoctrination centres)
where we are forced to attend for the next 18
years to be primed as drones for the
workforce. Unless we are born into privilege
or a primitive tribe where we are self-
sufficient and can live off the land, we must
work a 9-5 job to pay to be alive or be
forced into homelessness and destitution. A
good portion of our income is taxed, and we
are forced to live like this for the next 65
years before we can retire (if we are lucky,
nowadays even that is impossible for many)
and then finally we can spend our so-called
“golden years” relaxing. In many countries,
suicide is illegal and punishable by
imprisonment because destroying “state
property” is against the law. In many
countries, national military service is still
compulsory, showing we are property of the
state. I am a person who is pro-sovereignty

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and autonomy – I would not want my child

to be born into economic enslavement as
state property without their consent. Ideally,
I would want my child to be valued as a
person and not as a tax-paying cash cow
with no real sovereignty or personal
autonomy.

5. Existentialism

Life has no purpose except to avoid

danger and death, eat, sleep and replicate
mindlessly. Humans have created many
mechanisms to provide so-called “purpose”
in life, but as we delve deeper and
extrapolate these mechanisms, we are left
with a meaningless existence perpetuated by
futility and pointlessness. Having
experienced existential depression, I can
firmly say that it is very difficult to endure,
and no person should have to struggle with a
nihilistic existence with artificial band-aids
to continue their life. In his essay titled “The
World as Will and Representation,”
Schopenhauer describes existence as “What
occupies all living things and keeps them in
movement is striving for existence.

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However, with existence, when it is assured

them, they have no idea what to do.
Therefore, the second thing that sets them
into movement is striving to be rid of the
burden of existence, to render oneself
insensible to it, to “kill time”, i.e., to escape
boredom” and there is absolutely no way to
deny this irrefutable reality.

6. Futility

There is no denying that life is futile.

Nothing lasts forever, and everything we
accomplish or achieve in life is futile
because one day it will cease. Everything
about existence is futile because one day, we
will die, and it will no longer be with us.
Even people who have children “to carry on
the family name” will one day be forgotten
within the next 4 generations unless they are
a famous historical figures. I accept futility
as an inherent and inevitable part of the
human condition and try to avoid resisting it.
To quote Emil Cioran, “Since all life is
futility, then the decision to exist must be
the most irrational of all.”

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7. No Freewill

Genetic determinism means our existence

is randomness predetermined by our
genetics, environment, and things beyond
our control. We are indoctrinated with the
false idea that we have freewill, and we can
achieve certain things, and, in many cases,
they are out of reach for us. I do not like the
idea of giving my child false hope or
blaming them if they have not accomplished
certain things due to the lack of free will.
This also goes back to the arguments of
uncertainty and the genetic lottery, both
pointless and unethical to impose on a child
without their consent.

Secondary Reasons Why I’m an Antinatalist

1. Environmental Catastrophes

We have seen a rise in natural disasters

such as tsunamis, earthquakes, volcanic
eruptions, floods, droughts, and abnormal
weather conditions that have affected the
lives of millions of people. Since as far back
as the late 90s, there have been publications

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regarding water shortages and food security,

and we are starting to see the effects of these
on various populations caused by
overpopulation. It has been estimated that by
2025, two-thirds of the world’s population
will experience water shortages, and this
will continue to have a devastating effect on
ecosystems which is an ongoing trend with
many faunas continuously becoming
endangered or extinct. Mega droughts have
been causing a lot of food shortages which
have led to rapid price increases in foods in
the United States and other places. In Tamil
Nadu in India, there has been an ongoing
struggle with water shortages which has led
to water being rationed out by the Indian
government. Future generations will
undoubtedly experience these difficult times
ahead, which will only add to their
unnecessary suffering, depleting what is left
of their quality of life.

2. Social Unrest & Religious

Conflicts

In his thesis, “The Clash of

Civilisations”, political scientist Samuel P.

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Huntington explains the biggest threats to

Western civilisation are Islam and China.
We continue to see China grow
economically while Muslims continue to
have more children to outbreed their non-
Muslim counterparts, which will inevitably
lead to a clash of civilisations, especially in
the West. Similarly, the concept of
multiculturalism will undoubtedly lead to
various ethnic groups self-segregating due to
the tribal nature of human beings, and this
will lead to racial conflicts in the West.
Having been raised a Muslim, I wish to see
future generations salvage Western ideals
like free speech, which is slowly being
eroded and censored by political correctness.
The gap between the rich and poor continues
to grow, which will lead to social unrest,
which will also lead to further conflicts
between people of various groups. The
future looks bleak for the West as hostile
superpowers slowly infiltrate and orchestrate
the silent take over that I do not wish for my
future unborn children to live to experience.

3. Economic Collapse
(Austerity & Inflation)

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Since the late 90s, economists have been

anticipating an economic collapse worse
than the Great Depression of the 1930s.
Although the global economy has been
sustained with bail outs by the IMF and
World Bank, it is still on life support and
inevitable collapse. A global economic reset
will lead to more crime, instability, and
social unrest. We will continue to
experience austerity measures, and inflation
will continue to rise rapidly when we have a
paper economy that will lead to hard times. I
anticipate many future generations will
resort to selling intimate photographs and
videos of their bodies on OnlyFans to make
ends meet. Selling your organs to make ends
meet will become a norm unheard of. No
child should have to sell their body to
survive in a harsh, dystopian world they
didn’t consent to be part of… another reason
to remain childfree and focus on helping the
153 million orphans in the world who still
need to be looked after.

4. Misandry/Misogyny

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Conflicts between men and women will

continue to grow, and we see this in the rise
in divorce rates and domestic abuse cases.
Misogyny emphasises valuing a woman
based on fertility and childrearing.
Similarly, the misandry model requires
women to be superior to men to succeed in
enslaving them. This gap will continue to
grow in this dystopian world, which is
unhealthy for both male and female
children. No child should be forced to
conform to these oppressive standards,
another reason to not bring children into this
world.

5. Statism (Loss of Individual &

Collective Sovereignty)

Everywhere around the world, we see a

rise in big statist governments owned and
controlled by corrupt corporations. This
means more tyranny, fascism, and abuse of
power. We have gotten a taste of what a
militarised police state is like under Covid-
19 lockdowns, and we will continue to see
more loss in our autonomy which future
generations will endure. I do not want my

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future children to live to endure these types

of conditions, yet another reason for me to
be an antinatalist.

Life will only continue to worsen as the

years go by and the only way to safeguard
future generations is by not bringing them
into this world. Also, we have come so far in
our destruction not only as a species, but the
damage we have done is irreversible, so the
only solution is to pull the plug because we
cannot be saved or fixed, and we have
reached a point of unsalvageable no return.

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The reasons to not procreate by far

outweigh the reasons people should
procreate due to the ethical nature of
antinatalism being an anti-imposition
philosophy.

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In this chapter, we explored reasons to

break the cycle of procreation and the
importance of parents and accountability;
we also examined some disturbing statistics
on parental neglect and child abuse and the
importance of social responsibility with
regards to parenting. We touched on the
dystopian era we live in, and I share my
reasons for being an antinatalist. We also
looked at some visual figures to consider

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choosing the childfree lifestyle. In the next

chapter, we explore alternative pathways
towards finding meaning in life without
having children.

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 CHAPTER ELEVEN

Alternative Pathways Towards Finding

Meaning In Life

“Life has no meaning. Each of us has

meaning, and we bring it to life. It is
a waste to be asking the question
when you are the answer.”
 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

― Joseph Campbell

‘What is the meaning of life?’ is an age-

old question as old as the ‘what came first,
the chicken or the egg?’ question, and there
is no denying that the purpose of life is to
procreate and raise children, but just because
it is our purpose, it doesn’t mean we all have
to do it. One of the limitations of the
childfree movement is facing the challenge
of finding a “substitute” for this purpose.
Generally speaking, religious people tend to
have more children than their secular
counterparts, and many people who are
childfree and antinatalist also tend to be
irreligious. However, childfree people tend
to have more disposable income and free
time to create alternative pathways towards
meaning in life.
According to an interview with Professor
David Benatar, there is no cosmic meaning
to life and the meaning of life can be
something both objective and subjective
depending on the individual and what they
find meaningful. To avoid this needless
human predicament in future generations,

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we should cease creating more human

beings. If we are intellectually honest, the
purpose of life is to consume and reproduce
ad infinitum. Professor Benatar discourages
suicide as an option because we are
depriving ourselves of generating more
meaning into our lives and the pain and
suffering our suicides would inflict on those
we love. Annihilation is inherently bad and
would lead to deprivation of future goods.
According to an article published in the
Stanford Encyclopaedia of Philosophy there
are many ways to create meaning in life.
These include achieving personal goals,
obtaining an education, interacting with
research, automating labour, seeking the
highest good, devoting your life to
something, or making a positive
contribution. The meaning of life varies
from person to person, depending on each
one’s attitudes.
I have always believed the purpose of life
is to be of service to others because service
to others is what leads us down the road to
happiness and fulfilment. Research
demonstrates that those who help others are
happy and do not come across any obstacles

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in their lives, leading to less stress and

improved mental health. To experience its
abundance and fruitfulness, service to others
should be done sincerely and from the heart.
The constant inner intention should be to
help others and ensure you cause less
suffering and harm, which indirectly helps
them.

Volunteering

In her article titled “Volunteering – 7

Reasons Why Serving Others Serves Us,”
Kathy Gottberg explains the connection
between volunteering and how it leads to:

1. More happiness. According to

Stephen G. Post, professor of preventative
medicine at Stony Brook University in New
York and author of The Hidden Gifts of
Helping, a part of our brain lights up when
we help others. That part of our brain then
doles out feel-good chemicals like dopamine
and possibly serotonin. According to Post,
"These chemicals help us feel joy and
delight -- helper's high." A common reaction
is that "some people feel more tranquil,

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peaceful, serene; others, warmer and more

trusting." When we volunteer, we often give
ourselves deeper purpose and meaning,
which nearly always leads to greater
happiness.

2. Reduce stress. When we help others

our bodies release a hormone called
oxytocin, which buffers stress and helps us
maintain social trust and tranquility. Along
with oxytocin are other chemicals like
dopamine, a mood-elevating
neurotransmitter. These drugs tend to push
aside negative emotions and reduce the
stress level.

3. Relief from pain. A study done by

Pain Management Nursing reports that on a
scale from 0 to 10 that people's pain ratings
dropped from nearly 6 to below 4 after
attending a volunteer training program and
leading discussion groups for fellow
sufferers. Volunteering takes our minds off
our pain and makes us feel more in control
of it.

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4. Longer lifespan. Over 40

international studies confirm that
volunteering can add years to your life.
Current studies suggest up to a 22%
reduction in mortality rates! How much do
we have to do? Studies confirm that a
regular commitment of as little as 25 hours
per year is beneficial.

5. Lower blood pressure. A study done

by Psychology & Aging reports those adults
over 50 who volunteered for 200 hours in
the past year were 40 percent less likely to
have hypertension than non-volunteers. It is
believed this is accomplished because of the
lower stress, and the effects of being active,
social, and altruistic.

6. Reduce mild depression. A study of

alcoholics going through AA (Alcoholics
Anonymous) points out that those who
volunteered to help others were twice as
likely to stay clean a year later, and their
depression rates were correspondingly
lower as well. Plus, in many cases, mild
depression is linked to isolation.
Volunteering helps keep a person in regular

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contact with others and helps develop a

social support system.

7. Benefit your career. That's right. A

book entitled The Halo Effect by John
Raynolds insists that volunteering for the
right reasons can turn your life around that
the benefits will extend to your work.
Raynolds says, "Remember, when you
become involved, when you lead with your
heart as well as your head, the result is
always good." Instead of feeling depressed
or unfulfilled at work, Raynolds is convinced
that you will feel more happy, confident, and
energized when you find something that
makes you feel generous and purposeful --
and that, of course, will spread to every
single area of your life.
Selfless service leads to the progression
of all humanity and life. The fortunate
should always help the less fortunate. Such
service can range from financial assistance
to direct physical help, advice, support,
healing, and teaching. If all mankind would
embrace the concept of service to others,
then the greed, avarice, materialism,
egocentricity, and self-gratification so

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prevalent today would disappear, and the

world would be a vastly better place.

Meaning vs. Purpose

In an article titled “The Purpose Of Life

Is To Be Helpful, Not Happy,” Gustavo
Razzetti tells us:

“Life has no meaning, and that is why

most people can’t find their life’s purpose.
The purpose is not something we can
have; we bring meaning to life. “We make a
living by what we get, and we make a life by
what we give.” — Winston Churchill.
The paradox of happiness, too , is that the
more we chase it, the less happy we
feel. Happiness is more a state of mind than
an emotion. The ill-constructed idea of
happiness — “Dark Side of Happiness,” as
psychologists call it — distracts us from
more meaningful aspects of life. The bigger
the obsession with being happy, the less we
appreciate what we already have. Being
helpful brings purpose to life. “We rise by
lifting others.”— Robert Ingersoll.

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Discovering meaning is the purpose of life.

The American philosopher and poet Ralph
Waldo Emerson was right when he said,
“The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is
to be useful, to be honorable, to be
compassionate, to have it make some
difference that you have lived and lived
well.” Aristotle wrote that finding happiness
and fulfillment is achieved “by loving rather
than being loved.” Relationships with others
are “a central feature of a positive, well-
lived life” — that’s the critical insight
Psychologist Carol Ryff uncovered after
reviewing the writings of numerous
philosophers throughout history.
Similarly, a study by Daryl Van Tongeren
and his colleagues provide evidence that
prosociality enhances meaning in life. More
altruistic participants reported a greater
sense of purpose and meaning in their lives.
There are two types of well-
being: hedonic (a sense of happiness)
and eudaimonic (a sense of meaning and
purpose). A meaningful and happy life
often goes hand-in-hand, but not always.
That’s the insight behind a paper published
by Roy Baumeister in the Journal of Positive

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Psychology. The findings suggest that

meaning (separate from happiness) is not
connected with whether one is healthy, has
enough money, or feels comfortable in life,
while happiness (separate from meaning) is.
Satisfying your wants and needs might
bring you happiness, but doesn’t add
meaning. Happiness is about the present;
meaningfulness is more holistic — it brings
the past, present, and future together. The
research points to one essential factor to
finding meaning: developing high-quality
relationships. Happiness is linked to being a
taker rather than a giver; meaningfulness is
derived from giving to other people.”

People find a sense of meaning by

enriching the lives of others through
meaningful contribution. A friend of mine
had told me her dream was to become
wealthy so she could have all the time in the
world to help people by having her Non-
Profit Organisation. It would be nice to see
more secular and childfree charities that lead
by example in showing people alternative
ways to contribute positively to the rest of

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society. Having ample time and resources

enables one to create their sense of purpose
based on their passions, whether helping
orphans, starting a community garden or co-
op project, raising money for a preferred
charity of their choice, helping in a soup
kitchen, fostering or fostering adopting cats
and dogs. The lists and options are endless.
A Chinese saying goes: “If you want
happiness for an hour, take a nap. If you
want happiness for a day, go fishing. If you
want happiness for a year, inherit a fortune.
If you want happiness for a lifetime, help
somebody.”

Case Studies of Childfree

Contributions

I know of two people who were both

infertile; one of them had a lot of wealth and
established her orphanage, which had about
200-300 orphans. Before this, this woman
was shamed and ostracised in a patriarchal
society for her infertility. She tried every
treatment possible to conceive, and they all
failed. When asked about her decision to

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establish an orphanage, she said her

infertility was a blessing because she could
be blessed with many children she would
foster and raise as her own. Similarly, my
brother’s old friend from an Autism support
group had foster parents who fostered over
150 children in New Zealand, and they were
awarded an honour’s award from the Queen
of England for their positive contribution to
society. Even with his disability, my
brother’s friend’s foster parents still cared
for infants in the foster care system. They
even sold their house and moved to the other
side of New Zealand to support their autistic
foster son in his dreams to become a train
driver.

In this chapter, we explored the

importance of service to others and finding
alternative ways to find meaning in life. We
examined some uncomfortable truths about
life similar to our chapter on futility. We
also examined some case studies on
childfree couples who have contributed
positively to humanity. In the next chapter,
we explore ways to be a proactive part of

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solving the many problems that plague

humanity.

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 CHAPTER TWELVE

How To Be A Proactive Part Of The

Solution

“Never doubt that a small group of

thoughtful, committed citizens can
change the world. Indeed, it is the only
thing ever has.”

― Margaret Mead
 It is one thing to choose to remain
childfree, but what separates childfree from
antinatalists is the ethical reasoning for
refraining from procreation. To take things a
step further would be becoming an activist to
achieve outreach to convince more people to
refrain from procreating. According to the
University of Miami, political activism that
fights for a fair social system can improve
psychological well-being that benefits both
other people and us. Activism is said to help
enhance a sense of control over life and help
combat helplessness and hopelessness.
Becoming proactive in the solution can help
redirect our purpose to that of positive social
change.
Furthermore, to reap the health and social
benefits of activism, we need to participate in
helping create a culture of responsibility to
add value to our lives and the lives of others.
To achieve transformative change in the
community, it is important to join, organise
and reflect on antinatalism which requires a
collective effort towards change. Social
power is built on the strength of
 Honouring The Dishonourable:
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interpersonal relationships through

organising, action, and reflection.

International Day

According to the United Nations,

International Days are a powerful advocacy
tool. Historically, they are linked to
maintaining international peace, security,
promoting sustainable development,
protecting human rights, and guaranteeing
international law and humanitarian action.
Their main objectives are to raise awareness,
tackle serious problems, observe
commemorations and observances and
indicate interest in a given subject.
International Antinatalist Day is observed on
the 9th of April every year. It is a good
opportunity to put up fliers and hand out
pamphlets to people to help raise awareness
on antinatalism and child rights advocacy.
Similarly, World Children’s Day, which is
observed on 20th November, would be a
good opportunity to raise awareness for
child rights advocacy and antinatalism.

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Activism

According to reference.com, a political

activist is someone involved in the political
process of promoting, impeding, and raising
awareness about a certain issue. Political
activism involves active engagement
through protest, demonstration, or lecture
and taking a clear stance on an issue,
voicing an opinion, and working to ensure
that the change desired by political activists
occurs. Political activism is most effective
when done in large groups with community
organisers and the voices of demonstrators
drawing a great deal of attention. A positive
example of street activism is STOP
HAVING KIDS, based in Portland, Oregon
who has succeeded in helping raise
awareness about various issues related to
antinatalism. Their website says their “goal
as a collective liberation movement is to
publicise the often overlooked and
misinterpreted antinatalist/vegantinatalist
ideology and childfree lifestyle through a
multi-layered approach. These tactics
include encouraging advocacy (e.g.,
outreach and demonstrations), supplying

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people with educational resources and

materials, as well as providing clothing and
accessories that inspire critical thinking,
reflection, validation and positive change.”
Similarly, Amanda ‘Oldphan’ Sukenick
has done extensive online activism work
through Antinatalism International (ANI) to
help raise awareness about antinatalism to
communities online. On their website they
say, “ANI was established to help facilitate
the entrance of antinatalist philosophy into
the mainstream consciousness of society.
ANI recognises the complexity of and
diversity of thought within the antinatalist
community and does not act to be a
spokesperson for the community but hopes
to facilitate the antinatalist community to
become a stronger spokesperson for itself.
To be truly international, ANI will work to
engage people from all regions and cultures
of the world, breaking down language
barriers to fully bring together anti-
procreative thinkers of all stripes.
Antinatalism is, at its core, the final civil
rights movement: the right to not be brought
into existence without consent, and it will

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need efforts from all corners of the globe to

be fully realised.”

Conferences, Forums & Workshops

Tribalism and the herd mentality can be

weaponised to help childfree people
congregate on various social media
platforms to create networks that allow them
to engage in activism on Facebook, Twitter,
Instagram, Reddit to discuss childfree and
antinatalist issues. There also needs to be a
normalisation and destigmatising of
pessimism, fighting against taboos and
social stigma of remaining childfree and
being an antinatalist. Perhaps these groups
will create workshops, conferences, and
forums both online and in real life that talk
openly about being childfree and
Antinatalism. The main objective should be
to educate ourselves and others about these
issues, and this is done by raising awareness
about these issues through memes, quotes,
hashtags, fliers, documentaries across
various mediums. We need to be conscious
of our use of language and be inclusive to

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attract people from all walks of life to our

platforms.
We should encourage equality between
parents (especially those unaware of how
their choices impact their children) and
childfree people and learn to show
compassion towards uneducated people. Our
motto should be to choose empowerment
over shame and promote antinatalism and
the childfree lifestyle as empowering
choices people can make. We also need to
reach out to those on platforms dedicated to
parental regret as potential allies for our
causes and encourage them to speak out
about their experience of having children
and regretting it. We also need to create a
cultural shift towards removing the stigma
around being childfree by choice,
experiencing parental regret, and being an
antinatalist. This is done by letting people
know when they are being stigmatising. To
cope with stigma, we must now allow
stigma to create self-doubt and shame. We
should also avoid isolating ourselves and
join a support group to help us feel
validated. This is also a means of engaging

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

in self-care and ensuring we take better care

of our mental health.
We also need to integrate childfree and
antinatalist concepts in our mainstream
culture through various mediums such as
cartoons, videogames, tv series, and other
mediums. For example, we should create a
videogame for small children to kill storks.
We need to utilise subliminal messaging to
subconsciously counteract children's
pronatalist narrative in their programming. I
have succeeded in creating an antinatalist
fairy-tale children’s book with an
antinatalist theme to help children realise
how wrong it is to procreate. Similarly, Life
Sucks created an antinatalist colouring book
to educate children on antinatalist subjects.
My friend has created an antinatalist
political party to help raise awareness about
reducing suffering and exiting this world
gracefully. The political parties need to
incentivise being childfree by phasing out
tax credits and providing tax breaks to
childfree people.

In this chapter we examined the

importance of being a proactive part of this

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predicament by engaging in activism. We

examined some case studies of pre-existing
activists such as Antinatalism International
and Stop Having Kids. We also touched
upon the importance of establishing
networks to connect with like-minded
people to help remove stigma from being
childfree, pessimistic or antinatalist.

- 185 -
Notes

Introduction

(1) Abasoomar, M. M. (n.d.). Jannah lies

beneath the feet of your mother.
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beneath-the-feet-of-your-mother/

(2) Ahmed, I. (2019, July 16). Honor your

father and mother in Islam. The Siasat
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from https://www.siasat.com/honor-
your-father-and-mother-islam-i-
1549798/

(3) BBC Bitesize. (n.d.). Hindu

relationships. Retrieved December 4,
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732sg/revision/3

(4) The Biggest Picture. (n.d.). John Lash's

Metahistory. Retrieved December 4,
 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

2021, from
https://thebiggestpicture.net/John_Lash

(5) Burfeind, P. (2015, June 29). Gnostic

Mysticism Grounds Modern Progressive
Ideology. Retrieved December 4, 2021,
from
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stic-mysticism-grounds-modern-
progressive-ideology/
(6) Israelite Way. (2016). History of
Mother's Day and Father's Day.
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https://web.archive.org/web/2016070200
5709/http://www.israeliteway.org/Lesson
s/Mothers_day_and_Fathers_day.pdf

(7) Johnson, S. (2021, October 27). What's

Filial Piety? Why Is It Important Today?
Retrieved December 4, 2021, from
http://joincake.com/blog/filial-piety/

(8) Niala, J. (n.d.). African Parenting: The

Sane Way to Raise Children. Retrieved
December 4, 2021, from
https://www.incultureparent.com/african-

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

parenting-the-sane-way-to-raise-
children/

(9) Open Bible Info. (n.d.). 100 Bible Verses

about Obedience To Parents. Retrieved
December 4, 2021, from
https://www.openbible.info/topics/obedie
nce_to_parents

(10) Segal, M. (2021, April 22). Honor the

Parents God Gave You. Retrieved
December 4, 2021, from
https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/ho
nor-the-parents-god-gave-you

Chapter 1 – Understanding Consent

(1) Chen, J. (2021, October 21). Ponzi

Scheme. Retrieved December 4, 2021, from
https://www.investopedia.com/terms/p/ponzi
scheme.asp

(2) Clarke, J. (2021, October 4). Cognitive

vs. Emotional Empathy. Retrieved
December 4, 2021, from
https://www.verywellmind.com/cognitive-
and-emotional-empathy-4582389

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 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

(3) College of Nurses of Ontario. (n.d.).

Consent Practice Guideline. Retrieved
December 4, 2021, from
https://www.cno.org/globalassets/4-
learnaboutstandardsandguidelines/prac/learn
/modules/consent/pdf/consentchapter2.pdf

(4) Edwards-Fowle, L. (2020, April 21). 7

Signs of People Who Lack Empathy &
Examples of Their Behavior. Retrieved
December 4, 2021, from
https://www.learning-mind.com/lack-
empathy-people-examples/

(5) Health & Disability Commission New

Zealand. (n.d.). Health and Disability
Commissioner (Code of Health and
Disability Services Consumers' Rights)
Regulations 1996. Retrieved December 4,
2021, from https://www.hdc.org.nz/your-
rights/about-the-code/code-of-health-and-
disability-services-consumers-rights/

(6) Merriam-Webster. (n.d.). Consent -

Definition & Meaning. Retrieved December

- 187 -
 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

4, 2021, from https://www.merriam-

webster.com/dictionary/consent

(7) rainn.org. (n.d.). What Consent Looks

Like. Retrieved December 4, 2021, from
https://www.rainn.org/articles/what-is-
consent

(8) Research Gate. (n.d.). Empathy -

Science topic. Retrieved December 4, 2021,
from
https://www.researchgate.net/topic/Empathy

(9) Robinson, M. (n.d.). Housekeeping.

Retrieved December 4, 2021, from
https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/10
56302-housekeeping

(10) Sharma, R. (2017, November 21). Life

Script — The end is written in the beginning.
Retrieved December 4, 2021, from
https://medium.com/romasharma/life-script-
the-end-is-written-in-the-beginning-
4c0074e8cf2a

(11) Strong, C. (1975, December 5).

Informed consent: theory and policy.

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 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

Retrieved December 4, 2021, from

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/P
MC1154761/

(12) Woolfe, S. (2020, November 2).

Antinatalism and the Consent Argument.
Retrieved December 4, 2021, from
https://www.samwoolfe.com/2020/11/antina
talism-consent-argument.html

Chapter 2: An Introduction to Natural

and Human Rights

(1) Benatar, D. (n.d.). David Benatar

Quote. Retrieved December 5, 2021,
from
https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/520
993-creating-new-people-by-having-
babies-is-so-much-a

(2) de Giraud, T. (2018). Antinatalism –

Right not to be born – Right to
voluntary sterilization. Retrieved
December 5, 2021, from
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yll_
juvjtus&t=47s

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

(3) The Free Dictionary by Farlex. (n.d.).

Legal Definition of Rights. Retrieved
December 5, 2021, from https://legal-
dictionary.thefreedictionary.com/rights

(4) Free Law Essays. (2020, June 1).

History of Natural Law and Human
Rights. Retrieved December 5, 2021,
from https://www.lawteacher.net/free-
law-essays/human-rights/history-
natural-law-human-rights-7294.php

(5) Good Reads. (n.d.). African Proverb.

Retrieved December 5, 2021, from
https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/994
6467-a-child-that-is-not-embraced-by-
the-village-will

(6) Livingston, C. (2016, July 29). A brief

history of the American pro-life
movement. Retrieved December 5,
2021, from
https://www.liveaction.org/news/a-
brief-history-of-the-american-pro-life-
movement/

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 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

(7) Mokhonoana, M. (n.d.). Mokokoma

Mokhonoana > Quotes. Retrieved
December 5, 2021, from
https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/861
5498-a-premature-death-does-not-only-
rob-one-of-the

(8) Puppinck, G. (2019). Natural law and

Human Rights. Retrieved December 5,
2021, from
https://eclj.org/geopolitics/un/natural-
law-and-human-rights

(9) UNICEF. (n.d.). The Convention on the

Rights of the Child: The children's
version. Retrieved December 5, 2021,
from https://www.unicef.org/child-
rights-convention/convention-text-
childrens-version

(10) UNICEF. (n.d.). What are Human

Rights? Retrieved December 5, 2021,
from http://unicef.org/child-rights-
convention/what-are-human-rights

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

(11) United Nations. (n.d.). Universal

Declaration of Human Rights.
Retrieved December 5, 2021, from
https://www.un.org/sites/un2.un.org/file
s/udhr.pdf

(12) Weaver, R. (2016). Negative Mental

Health Consequences of Unwanted
Child Birth and Restricted Abortions.
Retrieved December 5, 2021, from
https://www.empowher.com/mental-
health/content/negative-mental-health-
consequences-unwanted-child-birth-
and-restricted-aborti

(13) Wikipedia. (n.d.). The Right To Life.

Retrieved December 5, 2021, from
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Right_to_l
ife#cite_ref-2

Chapter 3: How People Are Indoctrinated

Into The Cult of Progeny

(1) Anonymous. (n.d.). Narcissism.

Retrieved December 5, 2021, from
http://www.eng.fju.edu.tw/Literary_Criticis
m/psychoanalysis/g_narcissism.doc

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 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

(2) Anonymous. (2010, January 24). Teen

Pregnancy: Too Overly Glamorized.
Retrieved December 5, 2021, from
https://www.teenink.com/hot_topics/health/a
rticle/169141/Teen-pregnancytoo-over-
glamorized

(3) Dawkins, R. (n.d.). Richard Dawkins <

Quotes. Retrieved December 5, 2021, from
https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/335018-
we-are-survival-machines-robot-vehicles-
blindly-programmed-to

(4) Downey, A. (2017, October 30). BABY

BLUES Celebs 'make women over 40 think
it's easy to get pregnant by hiding they had
IVF'. Retrieved December 5, 2021, from
https://www.thesun.co.uk/fabulous/4800360
/celebs-like-janet-jackson-and-halle-berry-
make-women-over-40-think-its-easy-to-get-
pregnant-by-hiding-they-had-ivf/

(5) Echols, M. (2016, June 8). My Children

Are My Legacy: A Reflection on the
Importance of Fatherhood (a Father's Day
Message). Retrieved December 5, 2021,

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

from https://www.huffpost.com/entry/my-
children-are-my-legacy_b_10295800

(6) Kingston, A. (2017, February 1). 'I

regret having children' In pushing the
boundaries of accepted maternal response,
women are challenging an explosive
taboo—and reframing motherhood in the
process. Retrieved December 5, 2021, from
https://www.macleans.ca/regretful-mothers/

(7) Kitchener, C. (2018, October 17). The

Trouble With Tribalism. Retrieved
December 5, 2021, from
https://www.theatlantic.com/membership/ar
chive/2018/10/trouble-tribalism/573307/

(8) Kleinman, S. (2015, December 23). 9

Responses To The People Who Always Ask
When I'm Going To Have Kids. Retrieved
December 5, 2021, from
http://scarymommy.com/pressure-to-have-
kids/

(9) McMurtrie, L. (2020, June 18).

Opinion: The Societal Pressures To Get
Married And Have Children Are Unhealthy.

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 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

Retrieved December 5, 2021, from

http://www.easternecho.com/article/2020/06
/opinion-the-societal-pressures-to-get-
married-and-have-children-are-unhealthy

(10) Reichl, D. (2018, January 18).

Tribalism and Human Nature. Retrieved
December 5, 2021, from
https://www.mindcoolness.com/blog/tribalis
m-human-nature/

(11) Stieg, C. (2021, March 16).

https://www.cnbc.com/2021/03/16/does-
having-children-make-you-happier-science-
of-parenthood-explained.html. Retrieved
December 5, 2021, from
https://www.cnbc.com/2021/03/16/does-
having-children-make-you-happier-science-
of-parenthood-explained.html

(12) Streep, P. (2015, December 1). 6

Terrible Reasons for Anyone to Have a
Child. Retrieved December 5, 2021, from
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/t
ech-support/201512/6-terrible-reasons-
anyone-have-child

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

(13) Tran, T. (2018, January 4). Herd

mentality: examples and how to take
advantage of it. Retrieved December 5,
2021, from
https://www.iwillteachyoutoberich.com/blog
/herd-mentality/

(14) University of Exeter. (2014, December

16). Herd mentality: Are we programmed to
make bad decisions? Retrieved December 5,
2021, from https://phys.org/news/2014-12-
herd-mentality-bad-decisions.html

(15) Walker, E. (2011, April 6). Direct and

Subtle Pressure to Have Children—How
Can a Childfree Wannabe Cope? Retrieved
December 5, 2021, from
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/c
omplete-without-kids/201104/direct-and-
subtle-pressure-have-children-how-can-
childfree-wanna-1

(16) Zacchia, C. (2016, December 21).

Tribalism Remains Mankind's Most
Dangerous Instinct. Retrieved December 5,
2021, from

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 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

https://www.huffpost.com/archive/ca/entry/i
dentity-politics_b_13744352

Chapter 4: How We Psychologically

Manipulate People Into Enslavement

(1) Abrams, P. L. (2007, September 13).

The Tradition of Reproduction.
Retrieved December 5, 2021, from
https://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm
?abstract_id=1012708

(2) Adongo, P., Phillips, J., & Binka, F.

(1998, March). The Influence of
Traditional Religion on Fertility
Regulation among the KassenaNankana
of Northern Ghana. Retrieved
December 5, 2021, from
https://web.archive.org/web/201708082
15825/http://www.popcouncil.org/uploa
ds/pdfs/councilarticles/sfp/SFP291Adon
go.pdf

(3) All About Philosophy. (n.d.). Morality.

Retrieved December 5, 2021, from
https://www.allaboutphilosophy.org/mo
rality.htm

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

(4) Hamilton, A. (2018, August 7). A

Christian Defense of Contraception.
Retrieved December 5, 2021, from
http://seasonedwriting.com/christian-
defense-contraception/

(5) Merriam-Webster. (n.d.). Morality.

Retrieved December 5, 2021, from
https://www.merriam-
webster.com/dictionary/morality

(6) Merriam-Webster. (n.d.). State

Definition. Retrieved December 5,
2021, from https://www.merriam-
webster.com/dictionary/state

(7) Merriam-Webster. (n.d.). Tradition.

Retrieved December 5, 2021, from
https://www.merriam-
webster.com/dictionary/tradition
(8) Occult World. (n.d.). Ancestor Worship.
Retrieved December 5, 2021, from
https://occult-world.com/ancestor-
worship/

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 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

(9) Rhonheimer, M. (n.d.). Ethics of

Procreation and the Defense of Human
Life. Retrieved December 5, 2021, from
https://www.thegospelcoalition.org/the
melios/review/ethics-of-procreation-
and-the-defense-of-human-life/

(10) Rothbard, M. (2021, January 13). How

the State Preserves Itself—and What the
State Fears. Retrieved December 5,
2021, from https://mises.org/wire/how-
state-preserves-itself-and-what-state-
fears

(11) Shah, S. (n.d.). Values and Norms of

Society: Conformity, Conflict and
Deviation in Norms. Retrieved
December 5, 2021, from
https://www.sociologydiscussion.com/s
ociety/values-and-norms-of-society-
conformity-conflict-and-deviation-in-
norms/2292

(12) Vučković, A. (2019, December 28).

Praying For Life – Top 10 Ancient
Fertility Goddesses. Retrieved
December 5, 2021, from

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

https://www.ancient-origins.net/myths-
legends-europe/fertility-goddesses-
0013064

Chapter 5: Acknowledging Facts For

What They Are

(1) Borgen Project. (n.d.). Poverty and Its

Contribution To Human Trafficking.
Retrieved December 5, 2021, from
https://borgenproject.org/poverty-
contribution-human-trafficking/

(2) Californians For Population Stability.

(2016, December 21). Quality of Life:
Overpopulation. Retrieved December 5,
2021, from
https://capsweb.org/blog/quality-life-
and-overpopulation-0/

(3) Castelo, J. (2021, August 22). Causes of

Water Conflict: Past Wars and Future
Predictions. Retrieved December 5,
2021, from
https://worldwaterreserve.com/water-
crisis/causes-of-water-conflict/

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 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

(4) Earth Eclipse. (n.d.). What is

Overpopulation? Retrieved December
5, 2021, from
https://eartheclipse.com/environment/pr
oblems-of-overpopulation.html

(5) Hong, N. (n.d.). Nathan Hong >

Quotes. Retrieved December 5, 2021,
from
https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/101
47848-i-am-not-pointing-fingers-but-
rather-pointing-at-the

(6) Moizaqeel. (2013, March 6). Poverty is

parent of all evils. Retrieved December
5, 2021, from
https://aticlesforyouth.wordpress.com/2
013/03/06/poverty-is-parent-of-all-evils/

(7) Parker, L. (2016, July 15). What You

Need to Know About the World's Water
Wars. Retrieved December 5, 2021,
from
https://www.nationalgeographic.com/sci
ence/article/world-aquifers-water-wars

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

(8) Population Pyramid. (n.d.). Population

Pyramid. Retrieved December 5, 2021,
from
https://www.populationpyramid.net/wor
ld/1990/

(9) Sustainability For All. (n.d.). Causes

and Consequences of Overpopulation.
Retrieved December 5, 2021, from
https://www.activesustainability.com/su
stainable-development/causes-
consequences-overpopulation/

(10) Tsillas, V. (n.d.). Research on Water

Disputes. Retrieved December 5, 2021,
from
https://www.omicsonline.org/open-
access/research-on-water-disputes-ier-
1000124.php?aid=69683

(11) UNEP. (2016, May 19). Rate of

Environmental Damage Increasing
Across the Planet but There Is Still
Time to Reverse Worst Impacts if
Governments Act Now, UNEP….
Retrieved December 5, 2021, from
https://www.unep.org/news-and-

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 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

stories/press-release/rate-
environmental-damage-increasing-
across-planet-there-still-time

(12) Werft, M. (2016, September 3). Will

The Next World War Be Fought Over
Fresh Water? Retrieved December 5,
2021, from
https://www.globalcitizen.org/en/conten
t/water-scarcity-wwiii-war/

(13) The World Counts. (n.d.). World

Population. Retrieved December 5,
2021, from
https://www.theworldcounts.com/popul
ations

Chapter 6: Acknowledging Futility

(1) Benton, T. W. (1990, March 1). The

Futility of Life. Retrieved December 9,
2021, from
http://truthmagazine.com/archives/volu
me34/GOT034068.html

(2) Oxford Dictionary. (n.d.). Futility.

Retrieved December 9, 2021, from

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

https://www.oxfordlearnersdictionaries.
com/definition/english/futility?q=futilit
y

(3) Pratt, A. (1994). The Dark Side:

Thoughts on the Futility of Life from
the Ancient Greeks to the Present. In
The Dark Side: Thoughts on the Futility
of Life from the Ancient Greeks to the
Present.

(4) Schopenhauer, A. (n.d.). The Essays of

Arthur Schopenhauer; Studies in
Pessimism. Retrieved December 9,
2021, from https://spiritual-
minds.com/philosophy/assorted/Philoso
phy%20-
%20Arthur%20Schopenhauer%20-
%20Studies%20In%20Pessimism.pdf

Chapter 7: Narcissism Masked As

Altruism

(1) Cohen, B. (2017, November 9). The

Essential Narcissism of Parenthood.
Retrieved December 9, 2021, from
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/bl

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 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

og/mom-am-i-disabled/201711/the-
essential-narcissism-parenthood

(2) Critalink. (1991). A third way we may

approach the study of narcissism is by
observing the erotic life of human
beings…. Retrieved December 9, 2021,
from
http://www.english.hawaii.edu/criticalin
k/narc/guide4.html

(3) de Giraud, T. (n.d.). The Art of

Guillotining Procreators: An Anti-
Natalist Manifesto. Retrieved December
9, 2021, from
http://theophiledegiraud.e-
monsite.com/medias/files/antinatalist-
manifesto-raw-translation-by-google-
1.pdf

(4) Russell, B. (1930). Bertrand Russell :

The Conquest of Happiness, 1930 (Full
Text). Retrieved December 9, 2021,
from https://russell-
j.com/beginner/COH-TEXT.HTM

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

(5) Trials & Tests. (n.d.). 45 Toxic Parents

Quotes For Ending Their Hurtful
Legacy. Retrieved December 9, 2021,
from
https://trialsandtests.com/inspirational/q
uotes/toxic-parents-quotes-about-toxic-
parents/

(6) Vaknin, S. (2011, June 15). Are all

Parents Selfish Narcissists? [Audio
recording]. YouTube.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uLh
5nhZSElg&t=7s&ab_channel=SamVak
nin%27sMusings

Chapter 8: Why They Deserve No Glory

(1) Abuse Warrior. (n.d.). Warning Signs

Of Trauma Bonding: What Is Trauma
Bonding And How To Cope. Retrieved
December 9, 2021, from
https://abusewarrior.com/toxic-
relationships/narcissistic-abuse/what-is-
trauma-bonding/

(2) Adcox, S. (2021, August 4). When Adult

Children 'Divorce' Their Parents.

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 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

Retrieved December 9, 2021, from

https://www.verywellfamily.com/when-
adult-children-divorce-their-parents-
1695810

(3) Albom, M. (n.d.). Mitch Albom >

Quotes. Retrieved December 9, 2021,
from
https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/654
90-all-parents-damage-their-children-it-
cannot-be-helped-youth

(4) Ankrah, V. (2018, January 8). People

Share What Made Them Lose Respect
For Their Parents. Retrieved December
9, 2021, from
https://www.tickld.com/spooky/175162
9/people-share-what-made-them-lose-
respect-for-their-parents/

(5) Bryan, K. (2020, April 23). 5 Reasons

Why Adult Children Estrange From
Their Parents. Retrieved December 9,
2021, from
https://wehavekids.com/family-
relationships/adult-child-estranged-
reasons

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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

(6) Pappas, M. (2017, June 5). A look at

Stockholm Syndrome, Child Abuse, &
Toxic Relationships. Retrieved
December 9, 2021, from
https://www.survivingmypast.net/a-
look-at-stockholm-syndrome-and-child-
abuse/

(7) Pusateri, M. (2015, June 9). Parental

Stockholm Syndrome. Retrieved
December 9, 2021, from
https://medium.com/the-
outtake/parental-stockholm-syndrome-
1e322fcc1f13

(8) Sugar, A. [@joedan346]. (2021,

October 4). Parents are kidnappers,
murderers, torturers, enslavers. By
breeding, every known criminal act is
committed against the newborn. Rape,
theft, imprisonment, brainwashing,
oppression & exploitation, all forced on
the child, a defenseless, helpless being
at the mercy of its captors. [Status
update]. Twitter.

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 Honouring The Dishonourable:
The Truth About Our Parents

https://twitter.com/joedan346/status/144
4750233888608265?s=20

(9) Thinking of Autumn. (2015, May 21).

Why You SHOULDN'T Respect Your
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(10) Wylor-Owen, R. (2018, September 3).

Why 'Respect Your Elders' Is An
Outdated And Dangerous Phrase.
Retrieved December 9, 2021, from
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9/03/why-respect-your-elders-is-an-
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Chapter 9: No Obligations, But Their

Obligations

(1) Internet Encyclopedia of Philosophy.

(n.d.). Filial Obligation. Retrieved
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https://iep.utm.edu/fil-obli/

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(2) Kindling Zing. (2021, October 2). You

Don't Owe Your Parents Anything:
Saying "No" to Family. Retrieved
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your-parents-anything-saying-no-to-
family/

Chapter 10: Why You Should Break

The Cycle

(1) Aldridge, B. (n.d.). Quote. Retrieved

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(2) American SPCC. (n.d.). Child

Maltreatment Statistics. Retrieved
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(3) Arzt, N. (2021, April 29). Attachment

Disorders in Adults: Types, Symptoms,
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https://www.choosingtherapy.com/attac
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(4) Baras, R. (2016, August 18). What Kids

Need to Grow Up Healthy, Successful
and Happy. Retrieved December 9,
2021, from
https://www.ronitbaras.com/family-
matters/parenting-family/kids-need-
healthy-successful-happy/

(5) Gupta, R. (2021, January 26). 4 Reasons

Crime Rate Is Rising Worldwide.
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crime-rate-is-rising-worldwide

(6) Hedges, C. (2010, December 31). 2011:

A Brave New Dystopia. Retrieved
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(7) Jacobs, A. (2020, September 8). 5

Important Factors That Influence Child
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2021, from
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(8) Levy, T. (2018, February 20). Kids who

kill: Attachment disorder and violence.
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nter.com/kids-kill-attachment-disorder-
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Chapter 11: Alternative Pathways To

Finding Meaning In Life

(1) Benatar, D. (2020, September 13).

David Benatar: The Meaning of Life.
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(2) Big Think. (2020, July 20). Women who

go to church have more kids—and more
help. Retrieved December 9, 2021, from
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present/religion-parenting-fertility/

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(3) Campbell, J. (n.d.). Joseph Campbell <

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(4) Cooper, A. (n.d.). Selfless Service And

Service To Others. Retrieved December
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(5) Dadabaghwan. (n.d.). Helping Others:

The Purpose of Life. Retrieved
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happiness/humanity/help-others-the-
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(6) Gottberg, K. (2014). Volunteering -- 7

Big Reasons Why Serving Others Serves
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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

(7) Razzetti, G. (2018, December 3). The

Purpose of Life Is to Be Helpful, not
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(8) Santi, J. (2017, August 4). The Secret to

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(9) Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy.

(2007, May 15). The Meaning of Life.
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meaning/

Chapter 12: How To Be A Proactive Part

Of The Solution

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https://antinatalisminternational.com/w
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https://antinatalisminternational.com/wh
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(2) Mead, M. (n.d.). Margaret Mead >

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1-never-doubt-that-a-small-group-of-
thoughtful-committed-citizens

(3) Reference. (2020, April 4). What Is a

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(4) Stop Having Kids. (n.d.). Norms Should

Evolve. We Want To Normalize
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 Sarah Al-Sheikhli

(5) United Nations. (n.d.). Observances.

Retrieved December 9, 2021, from
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(6) The University of Miami. (n.d.). The

Importance of Activism During A Crisis.
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