Google’s New Manager Program

Facilitator Guide

Executive Summary
These course materials were originally designed for Google managers to help them transition from an individual contributor role to a manager role. In addition to building skills,
this curriculum incorporates introspection, perspective shifting, and awareness building. This product has been influenced by years of iteration, internal and external research, and
feedback from new managers. We’ve modified this public version, editing and formatting it to make it as useful as possible for a non-Google audience. We encourage you to
adapt it to fit your organization’s culture and scale.

Audience for Curriculum

This curriculum has been designed for managers with little to no prior management experience. Given that many activities require reflection on a current or past challenge, it is
ideal if the manager has been in the role for a brief period (45-90 days). While it makes sense to prepare someone for a job they are about to perform, we’ve found managers are
most receptive to learning after they’ve had some time in the role and experience upon which to reflect.

Recommended Pre-Reading for Program Owner & Facilitator(s)

For context on the models and philosophies included in this curriculum, you might find it useful to read the following articles and book:
● New York Times Article on Project Oxygen
● Harvard Business Review article on Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman
● Harvard Business Review guide to Coaching Employees
● Mindset by Carol Dweck

Recommended Delivery & Assembly of Participants

This curriculum is best delivered live and in-person. Managers spend a large portion of time learning from each other and sharing ideas in small groups. We offer this program
for groups of 25-30 participants. The program is open to all managers at Google and within each group we aim for diversity across functions, locations, and genders. We
intentionally assemble cohorts in which participants are not familiar with one another, as we find it leads to more openness to share challenges.

Curriculum Elements
Unit Title Duration Goals Elements

Kick-off 30 min ● Experienced manager shares anecdotal tips and how managing has been Guest speaker
rewarding and challenging Brief Q&A
● Introduce instructor to the group Program overview
● Agenda preview

Introductions 30 min ● Create class ground rules Brainstorm

● Group gets familiar with one another through individual introductions Introductions
● Formation of trio groups Group formation

Why Manage? 25 min ● Validation of the positive impact managers can have on teams Post-it note brainstorm
● Introduce Project Oxygen manager behaviors Debrief
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Mindset & Values 60 min ● Introduce mindset and the impact on performance TEDtalk video
● Examine how managers can prime team members to operate in a fixed or growth Group discussion
mindset

Emotional Intelligence 120 min ● Explain the importance of emotions in making informed decisions Lecture
● Reflect on an amygdala hijack experience Self reflection
● Share tips for integrating all parts of the brain after a trigger Pair activity
● Develop the skills of reframing

Manager Transition 35 min ● Understand best practices for managing former peers Reading
● Reflect on the transition experience Reflection
● Discuss current challenges with peers Discussion

Coaching 100 min ● Distinguish between various coaching definitions Lecture

● Explain when to coach or not to coach Peer practice
● Walk through GROW model for coaching Debrief
● Develop coaching skills through practice and feedback
● Raise awareness of the pitfall of giving advice when coaching could be used to
boost commitment and self-awareness

Feedback 105 min ● Give feedback with positive intent Lecture

● Balance positive and developmental feedback Role play practice
● Walk through SBI model for delivering feedback Debrief
● Develop feedback skill through practice and peer coaching
● Raise awareness of the biases that impact quality feedback

Decision Making 120 min ● Choose and communicate decision-making style (tell, consult, delegate, Lecture
consensus) with intention Discussion
● Use the skills of advocacy, inquiry, and summary to collect information and build Simulation
buy-in Debrief
● Practice using different styles of decision making in a group setting
● Use tools to bring clarity and transparency to decision making

Closing 30 min ● Summarize learning Reflection

● Develop action plans to transfer lessons learned Peer coaching
Group debrief

Alternative ways to deliver this curriculum:

● Offer as a weekly series
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Facilitator Guide
● Offer as full-day sessions with weeks in-between
● Re-design for use in small, self-organized peer groups
● Re-design for use in peer mentor / coaching sessions

Guidance on Choosing Facilitators

This curriculum can be taught by experienced managers, external consultants, or coaches. Facilitator credibility is a key component to program success. Ideally, your facilitator
has managed teams themselves and can add personal stories / perspectives to the conversation. At Google, we’ve often paired tenured professional facilitators with experienced
managers as a facilitation duo.

Slides Topic & Key messages Purpose & Facilitator’s Notes

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Welcome (30 minutes)

Kick-off Speaker Ideal kick-off speakers are well-known as

● Name, title, and tenure good managers (inside or outside the
● Why they are passionate about managing? organization). In this talk, the speaker should
emphasize why they enjoy managing while
● Thank them for coming
providing a few survival tips they learned
● Allow for Q&A if there is room on the agenda along the way.

What is this New Manager program?

There are key skills and frameworks we’ll offer you to try on and test, but there is no “one size
Purpose
fits all” approach to management. This course was developed based on Google’s Project Oxygen
and years of feedback from Google managers. As an individual, we will provide space for you to ❏ Introduce yourself and establish
reflect on your own values and be your authentic self in your new role. As a manager, we will your credibility
cover skills that underlie an inclusive management style, to help you tailor your approach with ❏ Tell the story of the program
each of your direct reports. ❏ Prime participants to get the most
out of the program
[Introduce yourself & background] ❏ Orient participants to the agenda
❏ Edify the kick-off speaker
You’ll notice that we have intentionally designed this course to honor the diverse ways in which
people learn — with detailed workbooks to supplement the slides, verbal delivery of content, and
many opportunities for reflection, discussion, and hands-on practice. Please consider your own
learning preferences and bring that to your experience here — whether it’s taking notes, asking
for or providing specific examples, etc. Please also provide ongoing feedback to us as your
facilitators if your needs aren’t being met and we will work with you to meet them!

Lay out the logistical details…

● Regular breaks, first one at XX:XX
● XX minute lunch breaks
● Location of closest restrooms
● +Any other relevant information

Introductions & Trio Formation (25 minutes)

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Trio Formation Instructions

● Write # of direct reports and top 3 values (see complete list in the workbook) on name
tent (folded cardstock paper) - take it with you
● Line up in the room based on team size, forming partial circle around room
○ Within those with the same # of direct reports, line up by tenure
● Introduce yourself: name, title, tenure, top 3 values
● Form Trio group with 2 others nearby - count off if necessary
● Encourage diversity of functions per trio, if applicable/where possible

You’ll work a lot with your trio, but you will also have opportunities to meet and work with
others. The trios will help ensure that you get to know at least several people well, and support
each other once the program is complete with your goals and peer coaching.

Sit with trio

● Share one fun fact about yourself
● Time permitting, discuss what resonated with you from the kickoff speaker’s ideas and
Q&A

Create class ground rules

Record on flipchart:
What ground rules would support you in learning for this group?

Examples:
● Come back from breaks on schedule
● Let Facilitator know if you need to step out for extended period of time
● Confidentiality
● Listen with respect
● Stay present
● Actively participate

Return to your original seat

Why Manage? (35 minutes)

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Prep: Draw two columns on a whiteboard or use two separate flipcharts. On the left side, title
“Pitfalls,” and on the right side, title “Value Add”
Purpose
Instructions ❏ Excite participants about the impact
they can have as manager
● Think about the best and worst managers you’ve worked for…how have they added (or
subtracted) value? Write just a couple* post-it(s) and place on wall in either category. ❏ Reinforce Project Oxygen
(*too many post-its to read = too much time) ❏ Prime participants to learn value add
behaviors
Debrief
Ask for at least two volunteers to read the post-its out loud—pitfalls first
● Left side (pitfalls of management), those who see these behaviors may feel like
managers don’t matter.
● We’ve all heard the saying, “people don’t leave jobs, they leave managers”
● A note about intention - it’s unlikely that any of these managers intended to be bad
managers, and they may not have realized their negative impact. It’s possible that any of
us could exhibit characteristics/behaviors from this column
● Right side shows all the ways you can add value in your role. This is why you are
important! Is there anything else you do that is less glamorous but is really important?
(e.g., compensation planning, performance reviews, hiring, managing low performers)
● How does it feel to read each list?

How much overlap do we see here with the 10 behaviors from Project Oxygen?

Does anyone feel like you’ve already mastered all the skills in the “Add Value” category?
(Likely no one)
Then you’re in good company and in the right place! In this course you will learn the core skills
to prepare you for this challenging role so that you may add the most value to your team.

Morning Break (~15 minutes)

Mindset (1 hour)

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Based on our last activity, it looks like we all have some learning to do. In this next section we’ll
talk about one of the biggest factors that influences the likelihood you’ll succeed in your new
Purpose
role.
❏ Encourage managers to
consider the possibility that they may
Brief Poll - Show of hands to assess agreement: thumbs up, thumbs down, or sort of hold a fixed mindset about some
● “It is important to me that I don’t appear incompetent” areas
● “You can learn new things, but can’t really change how smart you are” ❏ Assure participants that
● “People can’t change their deepest attributes” management is a learnable skill/
ability that benefits greatly from a
Clearly, there are differing mindsets even within this room! The questions I just asked are growth mindset approach
actually borrowed from those used by researchers to determine where someone is on the growth ❏ Key point: Mindset is
vs. fixed mindset continuum. Let’s take a look at a brief video that summarizes the recent CRUCIAL! (Yours and that of your
research around neuroplasticity and mindset. directs)

Video to introduce Growth Mindset: The Power of belief -- Mindset and Success | Eduardo Eduardo Briceño is the Co-Founder and
Briceno | TEDxManhattanBeach (11 mins, break halfway through for mini-debrief) CEO of Mindset Works, an organization that
helps schools and other organizations
[PAUSE VIDEO AT ~5:31] cultivate a growth mindset culture. The
growth mindset was discovered by Stanford
(Leave cursor at bottom of screen so you can see red bar)
professor and Mindset Works co-founder
● Raise your hand if you’re familiar with this body of work Carol Dweck, Ph.D., author of Mindset: The
● Turn to the person next to you and discuss your reactions so far (max 4 mins) New Psychology of Success. Mindset Works
offers Brainology, an innovative blended
[RESUME VIDEO] learning program to teach a growth mindset
to students, teachers, and schools, as well as
teacher professional development and tools.
You probably noticed that much of the research cited by the speaker was about children.
Virtually all of what we now know about mindset applies to adults too, and in this next activity
we’ll look even closer at some classic research on the subject.

Mindset + Values Purpose of introducing values by framing

We just took a deep dive into the dichotomy of a fixed vs. growth mindset. You’ll see this thread them as a mindset that can be practiced:
throughout the next few days, but let’s also expand how we think about mindset, which is more Each individual has their own values, and
broadly “the established set of attitudes held by someone.” they are all valid and personal. The goal of
the course is not to force managers into a
How Do Your Values Show Up? (4 mins intro) mold, but rather to empower them to bring
their uniqueness and strengths to their roles,

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● Briefly, think of a time when you led or made a decision from your highest principles & thus hopefully helping managers find deeper
values in the past (hint: grey areas & unprecedented situations) meaning in their responsibilities and
● Consider the example of Humility* as a value. How might this show up in your choices potential to impact others. The message here
and behaviors as a manager? (Ask for examples, then reveal the following) is also that our deepest values are especially
○ Be open to and ask for feedback often helpful when faced with ambiguity and
making unprecedented decisions in tough
○ Actively seek opportunities to give & share credit
situations.
○ Share personal stories of mistakes or failures
○ Admit when you don't know something *
HBR: The Best Leaders Are Humble
○ Adopt mindset of being in service to team Leaders, Jeanine Prime & Elizabeth Salib

Turning Values into Mindsets You Can Practice (15 mins)

● Now that you’ve identified your most important values, which one(s) currently
influence how you perceive and manage your team?
○ Are there others on your list that you can intentionally practice as a mindset?
What might this look like in action?
○ In your role as a manager, when are your values challenged?
● Take a few minutes to jot down your thoughts in your workbook.
● After about 5 minutes, you’ll get a chance to discuss in trios. Don’t worry if you haven’t
filled out the whole table by then, the discussion will spark ideas!

Ring bell to move from self reflection to discussion in trios

● (Time permitting) Is anyone willing to share an example from their trio?

More likely than not, the other members of your trio identified at least some different values that
are most important to them. To better understand the behaviors, motivations, and beliefs of
others, it’s extremely helpful to learn what they value most. As for yourself, if I were to ask your
team members what you value most and how these values manifest in how you manage, would
they be able to accurately identify your top 1-3 values? If your answer is “probably not,” it might
be worth taking a look at what came up for you in this activity again, to turn those aspirational
values into mindsets you practice every day.

Lunch (45 minutes)

Emotional Intelligence (2 hours)

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Introduction: to kick off this next section about emotional intelligence, let’s first jump into an
activity that will help us explore how emotions can actually contain valuable data. We’ll then
Purpose
take a closer look at definitions and practical applications of emotional intelligence.
❏ [Warm-up activity] emphasize that
emotions are valuable data
Emotions are Data
❏ Introduce and define Emotional
Not being aware of how we feel about something or what our “gut” is telling us can lead us to
Intelligence (“EI”)
make poor decisions or indecision.
● For motivating us: Emotions such as curiosity and happiness move us towards things ❏ Cultivate self-awareness of personal
● For protecting us: Emotions such as fear or disgust move us away from things that could triggers
harm us ❏ Examine strategies of emotion
● For understanding ourselves and others regulation & reappraisal
❏ Introduce empathy as an EI skill that
Allow time to silently read quote: can be improved over time, as well
“Denial of our emotions isn’t the only danger we face when we rely too heavily on our as compassion
left brain. We can also become too literal, leaving us without a sense of perspective,
where we miss the meaning that comes from putting things in context (a specialty of the
right brain)” -Daniel Siegel

Emotions alert our attention in some way and influence our attitudes and/or behaviors, whether
consciously or subconsciously. They are usually tied to a human survival need.

Emotions as Data Exercise (15 mins)

Preparation: Write the following 5 emotions on whiteboards or flipcharts around the room: Joy,
Fear, Anger, Disappointment, and Surprise.
● Take a look at these examples of basic human emotions. Reflecting back on the past
week or so, identify one that you remember experiencing and go to that flipchart. (If
everyone goes to the same flipchart(s), encourage distribution)
● Turn to the person next to you and discuss if you’re comfortable sharing, explain the
context (2 mins)
● In your group (Record on chart, 5 mins)
○ How did this emotion affect your thoughts or actions?
○ What “data” was this emotion giving you? (i.e. was a value threatened?)
○ If you had better understood the “data” of your emotion, would it have changed
how you acted or viewed the situation? Why or why not?

Debrief by asking groups to share what questions they’ve come up with. (up to 8 mins)
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Hopefully this brief exercise demonstrated that emotions are inherently valuable data, as you start
to “peel the layers of the onion” by using questions to discover what we can learn from them.
When emotions are named, they become information — the act of identification and
acknowledgement actually soothes the brain. This is sometimes referred to as Emotional
Literacy, and is a core competency of Emotional Intelligence.

What Is Emotional Intelligence?* (5 mins) *More background about EI: Emotional

Much of this program is about building self-awareness around your emotions: how they affect Intelligence embraces and draws from
your behaviors, and how these behaviors show up in your management style. Once you have a numerous other branches of behavioral,
strong sense of self-awareness, it’s much easier to grasp the other side of Emotional Intelligence, emotional and communications theories,
which is other-awareness, or empathy. As you might imagine, this is a critical competency for such as NLP (Neuro-Linguistic
managers and aligns with Oxygen behaviors: #3 Expresses interest and concern for team programming), Transactional Analysis, and
member’s success and personal well-being and #5 Is a good communicator — listens and shares empathy. By developing our Emotional
information Intelligence in these areas and the five EI
domains (Goleman, 2005), we can become
more productive and successful at what we
Based on what you already know, let’s hear your thoughts - what do I mean by EI? [Gather a
do, and help others to be more productive
few responses from the group and capture them on a whiteboard]
and successful too. The process and
outcomes of Emotional Intelligence
The EI concept argues that IQ, or conventional intelligence, is too narrow; that there are wider development also contain many elements
areas of Emotional Intelligence that dictate and enable how successful we are. Success requires known to reduce stress for individuals and
more than IQ (Intelligence Quotient), which has tended to be the traditional measure of organizations by decreasing conflict,
intelligence, ignoring essential behavioral and character elements. We've all met people who are improving relationships and understanding,
academically brilliant and yet are socially and interpersonally inept. And we know that despite and increasing stability, continuity, and
possessing a high IQ rating, success does not automatically follow. EI is harder to measure. EI harmony.
impacts how we manage others.

Definitions of EI vs IQ [Ask someone to read EI definitions]

● Emotional Intelligence (EI): Our ability to recognize and understand emotions in
yourself and others, and your ability to use this awareness to manage your behavior and
relationships. (Goleman & Boyatzis)
● Cognitive Intelligence (IQ): Your abilities to learn and understand new situations, to
reason through a given problem, to apply knowledge to a current situation. Intelligence
primarily involves the neocortex portion of the brain, which governs abstract thinking
and reasoning.

The definition provided is the most accepted by main researchers. More and more research is

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telling us how important EI is to success. A key person on this is Daniel Goleman who has
studied this for ~30 yrs. He really put EI into the mainstream.

You can think of EI simply as: the intelligent use of emotions [as data]. To develop strong EI
skills, the first place to start is to recognize and understand emotions in yourself. That will be the
focus of our skill building today. Later we’ll work on managing your behavior in relation to
others.

Why is EI So Important? *Dr. Daniel Goleman reported an analysis

How can it be of benefit to you? that shows emotional competencies to make
● Current research suggests that great management and leadership performance is directly up 80 to 100% of the distinguishing
proportionate to your level of EI, of which self-awareness is perhaps the most important competencies of outstanding leaders.
ingredient.
● By harnessing the power of self-awareness you may be able to make better decisions,
communicate more effectively and tailor your message to be heard, reduce your own
levels of stress, and hopefully increase your prospects for career advancement.
● Repeated studies have shown the key differentiator for success in complex jobs,
especially leadership roles is...Emotional Intelligence*

Emotional Intelligence Can Be Learned

● It increases over time if you are motivated and disciplined to learn the competencies and
behaviors (”maturity”)
● The “core” of Emotional Intelligence, the limbic system (the location of our emotions),
learns best through motivation, extended practice, and feedback
● To optimize the use of our emotions, the following are required: information;
motivation; practice and openness to feedback about the impact of our behavior

EI Deep Dive: Relating to Others *Sympathy, Empathy, Compassion

Let’s take a closer look at the “awareness of others” piece of emotional intelligence. Since EI is definitions
associated with quite a few buzzwords these days, we’ll start by establishing some shared
vocabulary at least for the purposes of this course’s discussion. **For a very thorough talk on empathy,
check out this Google Talk: Roman
Would anyone like to help us differentiate between these three words*? Krznaric: Why Empathy Matters and How to
Get it.
[Pause, answers on next slide]
● Sympathy is the heightened awareness of another person's plight as something to be **For even more info, check out this white

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alleviated (Lauren, 2005) paper by the Center for Creative Leadership

● Empathy** is the ability to take the perspective of, and in some cases vicariously on Empathy in the Workplace
experience the circumstances or emotional state of, another (Baron-Cohen, 2006)
● Compassion is takes a step further - it’s when one not only feels empathy but also a
desire to take action to help alleviate the suffering of the other
Note that “suffering” does not need to be present to act with compassion

EI Deep Dive: Aim for Compassion For the latest research about empathy as a
Transform your experience of empathy into compassionate action. precursor to compassion:
● Greater Good Institute article about
Why? Neuroscience research shows: compassion and why/how to
● Too much empathy can cause stress & burnout for the empathizer cultivate
● Same brain regions are activated in the person suffering & empathizing ● Greater Good Institute of Berkeley
● Compassion instead produces feelings of concern, warmth, and motivation to help the article on empathy vs. compassion
other person ● Preventing emotional burnout of
empathy with compassion
How can I cultivate compassion?
● Ask how you can help, don’t assume you know what’s wanted/needed
● Look for commonalities with your team members
● Encourage cooperation instead of competition in your team
● Cultivate a genuine curiosity about the individuals on your team
● Lead by example — treating others with compassion is contagious!
● Be mindful of boundaries — avoid being an emotional sponge

Empathy & Compassion in Practice (~10-15 mins total, workbook)

Ask yourself: [private reflection]
● Who in my life do I most need to develop more empathy for?
● How might I do this?

Turn to a partner and brainstorm:

● What could you do to increase empathy for and compassion towards your those you
work with? (directs, your manager, clients, or your peer colleagues?)

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Debrief as a Class (5 mins)

After about 10 mins, bring attention back to the room and harvest some responses

To recap…
Empathy : Golden Rule :: Compassion : Platinum Rule
Rather than assume others view things the same way and want the same things as you do, take
the time to get to know them and understand how they see things and what they want. There’s
nothing objectively wrong with Empathy or the Golden Rule, Compassion is just the next best
level as is the Platinum Rule (treat others as they wish to be treated). You may never know what
the other person really needs or wants from you unless you ask!

For example, if you have a team member who has a [disclosed] disability that you are not
personally familiar with, chances are that attempting to empathize with their unique challenges
will only take you so far, and your resulting assumptions about their needs may be wrong or even
harmful. In a scenario like this, the compassionate place to start would be to ask them privately
about what you and others on the team could do to best support them, then focus on taking
informed action to follow through.

Jeff Weiner quote* (LinkedIn CEO, speaking at Wisdom 2.0 2015)

"Compassion is almost an objective form of empathy where you have enough space between your *4 min video or article by CEO of LinkedIn
feelings and the other person’s feelings when you’re in a position to help them, and ultimately Jeff Weiner on the subject of Compassionate
alleviate their suffering if that’s what’s required.” Management

Segue to Triggers-- For now, let’s move on to a brief look at some basic neuroscience to better
understand the underlying brain mechanisms of emotional intelligence.

First, think back to a situation at work when you experienced high stress, and/or negative
emotion - to the extent that your ability to perform was compromised.

Hand Model of the Brain* (3 mins) *To prepare, we highly recommend watching
Dr. Dan Siegel has a great representation of the brain, called the “hand model.” Has anyone this ~2 minute video of Dr. Daniel Siegel
heard of it? (allow volunteer to describe if any hands go up!) explaining hand model of the brain

Steps (encourage everyone to follow along)

● Hold out your hand as if you were waving hello to someone
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○ Arm and wrist = brainstem and spinal cord

○ Brainstem = "reptilian brain,” regulates organs including the lungs and
heart. Also regulates our states of arousal (e.g., hunger, wake, sleep, fight or
flight response)
● Put your thumb in the middle of your palm
○ Thumb = limbic regions of your brain
■ Involves emotions and judgement of situations as good or bad
■ Also makes it possible for us to feel connected and attached to other
people and animals
■ Amygdala enables reacting with survival instincts
● Fight or flight hormones
● Mobilizes movement
● Make senses more alert
● Speed heart rate
● Raise blood pressure
● Slow breathing rate
● Fold your four fingers over your thumb - now it should look like a fist with your thumb
tucked under.
○ Fingers = cortex
■ Prefrontal cortex=part that is in front of your thumb (knuckles)
■ Allows for executive function, logical reasoning and creativity
○ “Flipping our lids” (demonstrate by flipping four fingers up) = when we react
we are triggered by a situation vs. able to respond intentionally. We lose
flexibility and lose moral reasoning - we can act in ways that are terrifying to
other people. Having the meta-awareness of this helps!

Amygdala Hijack & Triggers

Amygdala hijack – this kicks in before the neocortex is cognizant of the situation! Have you ever
felt after the fact that your reaction was the wrong one? Said something you wish you hadn't?
Overreacted to something?

The amygdala is a trigger point for a fast, strong response. When we perceive threat, the brain’s
crisis response still follows an ancient strategy - it heightens our senses, stops complex thought,
and triggers the knee-jerk, automatic “fight or flight” response and a flood of stress hormones.*
This is the amygdala hijack. *Note that the initial stress hormone
response takes between 60-90 seconds to
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● The amygdala hijack has the power to override the prefrontal cortex (thinking brain), flush through the body. If you find yourself
but the prefrontal lobes cannot quickly and directly override the amygdala. It is far experiencing a physical response to the
easier for our emotions to impact thought than the other way around. trigger after that point you are choosing to
● Emotions can affect decision making/thinking much easier than thinking impacts stay upset.
emotion. Your brain cannot make a decision without using the limbic system of the
brain. Emotions are part of decision making.
● Effective decision making involves perceiving and understanding your emotions (self-
awareness) and using that information to guide (not dictate) your next step (self control
and self management).

This self-regulation piece can really help us to be more present for others: help us develop the
ability to really be in the moment, focus on one person, one conversation, one task at a time. Self-
regulation is all about slowing down.

So what? When we bring this into the workplace, it can cause us difficulty. You may Optional video “Just Breathe” with
unintentionally undermine your effectiveness. This is why it is important that we get better at interviews about kids, explaining the
self-regulating our emotions. amygdala and emotion regulation.

Triggers Activity continued (6-8 mins total)

We all have triggers; knowing what these are is important. Being able to regulate our reactions to
these triggers can really add to our success. The part of the brain that is responsible for EI is
trainable.

Again, recall that situation at work when you experienced high stress, and/or negative emotion -
to the extent that your ability to perform was compromised.

Jot down in your workbook:

● What were you experiencing? Were there any physiological signs?
○ Could you pinpoint what triggered you [at the time]?
○ What did you try to do? How did it go?
Meet with your trio and take ~ 2 mins each to share your experiences.

After you review the instructions, share a personal story about when you have been “triggered”
at work, before they work on their stories.

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Quick Trigger debrief (3 mins)

After activity, ask for a couple of volunteers who would be willing to share their stories.

Strategies for Emotion Regulation

Now we are going to look at strategies for emotion regulation. Before any strategy can be used,
we have to have noticed what’s happening — awareness is absolutely the first step in emotion
regulation. Noticing the reaction you are having and developing the skill of being able to instead
choose the response you want to have is what this is all about.
The approach is proactive and takes practice and roughly has three parts:
● You observe how you tend to react.
● You decide that this is not how you want to behave.
● You make the effort to change what you do in order to get to the desired result.

Emotion Regulation Strategy: Reappraisal

We are going to use an idea from Dr. James Gross, who is a professor at Stanford University. He
specializes in Emotion Regulation, and one aspect of his work is Reappraisal. He describes 4
ways in which we can re-appraise a situation. Simply put, reappraisal is a technique through
which you find a more positive way to think about the situation. At the same time, this is not to
take the stress away altogether, or repress it - but rather to find a way in the moment to be able to
cope so that you can bring your best, thinking self to the situation.

4 possible ways to try to reappraise a situation:

1. Reinterpreting — Finding a way to take the threat out of a situation. In social
situations, assume positive intent.
2. Normalizing — Acknowledging that it’s ok to feel anxious or overwhelmed - that it’s a
normal response.
3. Reordering — Understanding the value you are putting on the situation and adjusting
as needed.
4. Repositioning — Looking at the situation from another point of view— can you see it
from the other person’s point of view, from the point of view that someone you respect
might take, or how you might view it one year from now?

It’s helpful if you as the facilitator can use a personal example of one stressful situation to
reappraise with each of the four strategies.

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Reappraisal Activity in Trios (10 mins)

In your trios, discuss each of your situations and discuss how you can apply any of the four
strategies to reappraise your situation:
● How might you have reappraised the situation and been more skillful?
● Please come up with several questions that would be useful in coaching someone else to
reappraise with that method. Record them in your workbooks.

Debrief (5-10 mins)

Let’s report back to share any insights about your type of reappraisal. Please take us through the
coaching questions that you come up with in your trios as well.
Does anyone have any other emotion regulation strategies they use when triggered?

Mindfulness as Another Strategy to Emotionally Regulate (5-10 mins)

You may have heard of the term “mindfulness” as it relates to meditation, stress management, or
in the cultivation of self-awareness. Put simply, mindfulness is the act or practice of bringing
non-judgemental awareness to the present moment. Does anyone here have a mindfulness
practice of their own that they’d be willing to share?

Here are some strategies for how we can use mindfulness to regulate our emotions, especially in
challenging situations:
● Bring your attention to your breathing and physiological state
● Write down what is triggering you and why
● [tie back to hand model] shifting awareness/reminding ourselves what’s going on in our
brain helps to put our “lid” back on, and enables us to choose our response rather than *Researcher David Desteno on how
react to the amygdala hijack mindfulness meditation can encourage
compassion towards others
● Bonus: practicing mindfulness can facilitate the cultivation of compassion*

Closing Quote about EI

“The aim of developing emotional intelligence is to help you optimize yourself and function at an
even higher level than what you are already capable of.” - from Search Inside Yourself by Chade-
Meng Tan

You got to experience emotions as data. Emotional Intelligence is really about being smart with
our emotions. You now understand how you can prevent or at least recover from “flipping your
lid” by using emotion regulation strategies such as reappraisal and mindfulness.

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Time Slides Topic & Key messages Purpose & Facilitator’s Notes

Transition from IC to Manager (40 mins)

Prep: Make sure a whiteboard or ample flipchart paper is nearby.

Hint: it’s helpful for people to sit with their trios already at the beginning of this section.
Purpose
❏ Validate that this transition is
Transition from Individual Contributor to Manager (5-10 mins)
challenging for everyone
● Who here is struggling at all with the transition from IC to Manager? (note if anyone
❏ Facilitate sharing of stories, both
doesn’t raise their hand, and be sure to call on them later)
challenges and successes
● What specifically is so challenging about this transition? (record examples, leaving
❏ Leave participants feeling
space for tips/insights during debrief) common examples below:
equipped with actionable new
○ If a new hire, acclimation to organizational culture strategies
○ Time & energy management, well-being
○ Not knowing what % to dedicate to manager vs. individual responsibilities
○ New duties— performance management, compensation etc.
○ Lack of guidance from their manager
○ Managing former peers (come back to this as segway to next topic)
● Hopefully everyone got a chance to read the article about Managing Former Peers last
night.

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Individual Reflection Time (~ 5 mins, depending on when people appear to be done)

● Please take some time to reflect on your personal transition, using the guiding questions
on the top half of the page in your workbook. We’ll get into trios soon.

Trio Discussions (approx 15 mins)

● Meet with your trio to share transition stories and learn from each other’s challenges and
successes. There are questions in your workbook to guide you.
● Choose at least one spokesperson from your table for the debrief, take notes!
● We’ll come back as a group in about 20 minutes. Avoid laptops/email please!

Debrief (5- 10 mins) Tip: add notes in a different color

Call on each table to hear their insights/stories and tie back to the challenges recorded on marker.
whiteboard. Be sure to draw out some of the positives participants discussed in groups: “What
have you gained or found rewarding in the transition to your new role?”

Break (10-15 mins)

Coaching (2 hours total)

Coaching
We’re going to begin with defining developmental “pure coaching,” establishing when you
should coach, examining the fundamental skills of effective coaching, and then introduce a Purpose
model you can use to further develop these skills. We’ll spend most of this module practicing ❏ Articulate what good coaching
these skills. looks, sounds and feels like
❏ Learn GROW coaching model
Defining Coaching: ❏ Hands-on practice of coaching
Google’s Project Oxygen skills and GROW model
● According to Project Oxygen, the best Google Managers are good coaches.
● They give specific, timely and balanced feedback.
● They know how to deliver hard feedback in a motivational way and understand unique
strengths & development areas of each team member.
● They tailor coaching (e.g. to individual motivations, communication styles etc), suggest
solutions, and have regular one on one meetings.

“Pure Coaching”

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● Using a set of skills to actively listen, ask powerful questions, raise awareness around *Sir John Whitmore – considered by
“blind spots,” challenge thinking and deeply held beliefs, make requests for new action, many as the modern-day father of
and design personal programs for their coachee. coaching. He was a Formula 1 race car
● Helps the coachee see new possibilities and take effective action. driver in England and became
● Most individual’s coaching default is to teach and it takes practice and a growth fascinated with how certain people
mindset to be able to effectively facilitate coaching. excelled in their sport over others, when
everyone had essentially the same
training and equipment. He began
Sir John Whitmore’s* definition of the essence of coaching: studying the "inner game" of sports
● Unlocking a person's potential to maximize their own performance. (tennis & golf) with Tim Gallwey and
● It is helping them to learn rather than teaching them. brought his learning and experience
into the business world.

Coaching Continuum
Before you can be really effective as a coach, you need to have an understanding of your
own style and how it can help or hinder the coaching process. Each person has a “default”
mode for coaching, and for many of us, that is teaching instead of facilitating. It is
important to understand your default coaching mode, and build the skills to practice and
maintain the facilitation mode.
LEFT SIDE of the slide: “Teaching” Coach:
● This type of coach does a lot of “telling”.
● They have the expertise and are trying to pass it on to help the other person achieve
something concrete.
● In using this style, the coach is typically drawing on his or her experience to pass on the
skills and knowledge the other person needs to achieve an outcome or to do their job.
● This sort of coaching is appropriate when tasks are to be performed in the “right” way
over and over.

RIGHT SIDE of the slide: “Facilitating” Coach:

● Coach is more interested in asking questions and listening instead of telling.
● Rather than hands-on technical experience the “Facilitating” Coach often has a broader
‘people empowerment’ expertise which they use.
● They typically recognise the potential in people and have a commitment to giving
individuals challenges and opportunities to stretch themselves and learn how to learn
(especially when the individual may have projects to undertake as part of their learning
journey).

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When Should I Coach?

Coaching is not appropriate for all situations when improved performance is the goal. Its
usefulness is contextual; the benefits that coaching offers must suit the coachee’s needs.

Situations in which coaching works best include:

● When working with high-potentials— fosters their long-term development
● When working with knowledge workers*— the “expert” leadership role has limitations *knowledge worker: a person whose job
when workers may be more knowledgeable than the boss. involves handling or using information.
● When commitment trumps control— when securing a direct report’s commitment and
intrinsic motivation is more important than controlling them
● When the issue is around managing relationships (w/direct reports, stakeholders)

When should coaching be avoided?

● When dealing with serious underperformers. Coaching is not a performance plan.
● When you, the leader, do have the answers. If you know exactly how work must be done,
direct instruction is better than inquiry; if a question has just one answer, people feel
quizzed.
● When control is more important than commitment. In doing routine tasks for example,
this may be the case.
● If the coach believes the coachee cannot achieve the goal. An important aspect of
coaching is having a growth mindset, and understanding that a person’s potential is not
known or knowable. *The attribution error is people's
● When there are safety or legal risks involved. tendency to place an undue emphasis on
internal characteristics to explain
someone else's behavior in a given
Before dismissing coaching in these instances, make sure you understand the situation accurately. situation, rather than considering
Is an apparent low performer really an low performer or victim of an attribution error*? Do you as external factors (based on the work of
leader really have the answers or just want to believe so? Is control really what is most important Edward E. Jones and Victor Harris
for the work, or might you need to learn to let go? If the answers are “no,” coaching may work. (1967)

HOW to “be a good coach”

We’re going to walk through a helpful model shortly to provide structure to the conversation itself,
but what does it actually mean to BE a good coach and HOW can you develop these skills?
1. Be fully present for and focused on the coachee
2. Be aware of your own mindset and that of the coachee
3. Practice empathic listening (also known as active or reflective listening)

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4. Ask open-ended questions to facilitate coachee’s own insight

Be fully present for and focused on the Coachee

It is important that as a coach you are fully present and focused in a coaching scenario. We are
always busy and on the go, but it is extremely important to clear your mind and focus on the
coachee and facilitating the process. Otherwise, we slip back into our default mode on the
coaching continuum and will “teach” instead of “facilitate.”

● How present are you now on a scale of 1-10? (show of hands/fingers)

● What’s getting in the way of you being a 10? (reflect, don’t answer)
● What will you do right now to move closer to 10? (reflect, don’t answer)
● What can you do in the future to be present and focused when coaching others?

[Ask for ideas from participants, then reveal the following bullets on slide]
● Choose a location that’s private and quiet
● Silence and put away devices (laptops, phones etc.)
● Bring pen and paper for notetaking
● Schedule a little buffer time before and after
● Ground yourself and/or meditate right before

Meditation (2-3 mins total)

Let’s try a very brief meditation. You can use this before entering a coaching scenario.

Sit down in a comfortable position with your feet grounded on the floor, your posture in an alert
yet relaxed position. Close your eyes if you like, or direct your gaze downwards.

Gently bring your attention to your breathing...take a deep breath...and slowly exhale…repeat this
three times, as deeply and slowly as possible. (Long pause) Now, continue to breathe deeply but
let’s shift our attention to what else is going on in our bodies. Begin an internal body scan at your
feet, noticing their connection to the floor beneath you...working your way up to your
calves...knees...thighs…simply noticing any sensations with non-judgemental awareness...pausing
again to feel the effect of gravity on your contact with the seat of the chair, sinking into it a little
more heavily. Then shift your attention gradually up your back, noticing any sensations here and
perhaps adjusting your spine for optimal comfort and alignment... Bringing your awareness now to
your shoulders, are they relaxed? Try to let them go…then scan your arms and hands, all the way

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to your fingertips, you might wiggle them. (Pause) … Gently notice what’s happening in your
neck, remember to keep breathing as you finally bring your awareness to your head. As you
breathe deeper, does it influence any sensations you feel in your body? (Pause) Okay, without
opening your eyes just yet, bring your attention back to this room, visualizing the walls, the people
next to you, and the grounding of your feet once again. Gently, when you’re ready, please open
your eyes.

● How present are you now on a scale of 1-10? (show of hands/fingers)

● How many of you feel more present than before the meditation?

Be aware of your own mindset and that of the coachee

A “growth mindset” enables the coach the be open to the entire potential of the coachee. No one’s
full potential is known or knowable, there is always room for growth. Having a growth mindset
allows us to experience failure less emotionally and learn from it. Coaching helps the coached
person adopt a productive growth mindset. There is an emphasis on learning from mistakes versus
letting them fuel negative narratives about oneself. The effort is less directed towards “fixing” and
more towards understanding. Support is offered hand in hand with challenge; empathy goes with
accountability.

Thinking back to yesterday— how might (you as the coach) having a fixed or growth mindset
affect how you show up in a coaching situation, perceive/judge the coachee, and the overall
outcome/impact on the coachee? (Pause to see if anyone wants to contribute)
ie. Do you actually believe that this person is coachable in this particular area/at all? Do they seem
to be interested in learning/exploring a new approach to their problem?

Research* actually shows that where you are on the mindset continuum (leaning more towards *Managers’ Implicit Assumptions
Growth or more towards Fixed) with regard to your assumptions about others has a significant About Personnel (Heslin &
impact on the accuracy of your performance appraisals as well as your likelihood to participate in VandeWalle, 2008)
coaching.

Specifically, managers with more of a growth mindset in this area:

● Pay more attention to information that’s inconsistent with their expectations/assumptions
about the direct/coachee
● Are more data-driven in response to performance change (decline OR increase)

Therefore, it’s essential that we as managers/coaches are mindful of the mindset we bring to

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coaching situations, and check any assumptions we might have about the people who are
entrusting us to coach them.

So, perhaps you know that you lean towards a fixed mindset when it comes to your beliefs about
the malleability of personal attributes such as competence or work ethic. What can you do to
intentionally train yourself to adopt more of a growth mindset, given the potential payoffs for your
role as an effective manager and the success of your team?
Self-awareness is the first step— good news, now you already have this!

Quick group discussion (up to 5 mins)

How would you coach a person who has a fixed mindset about the subject you wish to coach them
on?

[if no one mentions this, offer the following tip] Remind the coachee of a time they successfully
accomplished a task or learned a new skill that they thought was impossible / they were incapable
of. If you don’t have a long history with them, ask them to reflect on a time they accomplished
something they didn’t think they were capable of.

Practice empathic listening *Speed of speech is 125-150 words per

Recall yesterday when we talked about how the value of empathy is a powerful component of minute whereas the speed of thought is
one’s emotional intelligence, one that can be cultivated. Empathic listening improves mutual 600 - 800 words per minute
understanding and builds trust (also known as mindful, active or reflective listening). You’ll find (International Listening Association
that it’s useful for coaching, mediation, friendships, parenting— essentially, for relationships of all Inc). What this tells us is that the speed of
kinds! thought is much faster than the speed of
speech, meaning that when I talk to you
right now, you are already way ahead of
What does it mean to practice empathic listening?*
me, or processing your reply,
When you listen to someone with this intention, you’re letting them know “I am interested, I care, contextualising the information I’m giving
and I seek to understand what you are saying. I am not judging you and I acknowledge how you you, or just simply drifting off!
feel about this issue.”
In most human interactions, we ask
As an empathic coach/listener, you will usually provide welcome validation and catharsis for the questions to clarify or relate, but
coachee. This practice includes: particularly in coaching situations, with
● Hearing what the other person is saying direct reports, it is essential to allow the
○ Attention is squarely focused on the other person speaker feel as though they have your
○ Listening to their answers undivided attention before jumping into
○ Asking follow-up questions solution mode or questioning mode.
○ Paraphrasing and clarifying
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● Noticing other person’s energy, mood, tone of voice

○ Listening & looking for impact on the person – high or low energy?
○ Noticing gestures, body language
○ What isn't being said?
○ Listening to your gut / intuition & naming it

Brief discussion and practice- empathic listening (6-10 mins)

What does the opposite of reflective listening look like, and what does it feel like on the receiving
end? (pause for volunteer responses)

In pairs, decide who will be the speaker first and who will be the listener
Two rounds, two minutes each:
● Speaker responds to the prompt: Talk about an event in the past two weeks that had some
emotional “juice.” Could be joyful, surprising, fearful, etc.
● Listener practices empathic listening... listens for two minutes while reflecting back what
they heard and check for understanding. Focus on values, emotions and body language…
continue to reflect back until Speaker is satisfied.
[Switch roles]
● Debrief. What was it like to be listened to?

In the same pairs, the person [most] facing the front of the room will be the listener first and the
other person shall be the speaker
Two rounds, 1 min each:
● Listener practices non-empathic listening. (Distracted, interrupt, etc.)
● Speaker responds to the prompt: What gets in your way of being the coach you want to
be? How could you be a better coach for each of your reports?
[Switch roles]
● Debrief. How was this experience different from the last?

Time allowing, Pick 2-3 people at the end of this third minute to volunteer takeaways.

Ed Batista quote
“Focused attention on coaching is more important than the time spent. What matters most is
listening so the other person feels heard. Eliminate distractions and cultivate a sense of presence in
the moment.”
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Ask open-ended questions to facilitate coachee’s own insight Facilitator tip: Spend a moment on the
This next coaching skill is asking open questions. Think about open questions in this way — you structure of a question: is it Open,
want to focus on the what and how and avoid the why. Some questions to get more information Closed, Leading, Multiple Choice? We
(who, when, where) may be necessary. have habits in how we shape our
● The BEST questions: What and How encourages expansive thinking questions. Illustrating different
architectures of questions helps people
● Info-gathering questions (Who, When, Where) – use sparingly, but as needed
catch their habits in action.
● Why questions. Avoid these, they sound judgemental and put people on the defensive,
even if it’s not your intention. Try rephrasing Why questions with What or How, e.g.
“What factors did you consider?” “How did you decide what to do?”
● Note: Avoid phrasing advice as a question, e.g. “Have you tried XYZ?” or “Do you think
XYZ could work?”

GROW Model (Intro, 1 min) We will be using a simple, effective coaching model today called
“GROW”. This is a light-touch, helpful tool for guiding a coaching conversation. It’s not meant to
be restrictive, but to be used adaptively based upon your own style and the needs of the person
you’re coaching.

Although it is a 4-stage framework, the coaching session may not always be linear in format;
depending on the individual, there may be times that you go through the model twice in one
session (aka “peeling the onion”), or come up with options before you have established a very
clear goal – this is not ‘wrong’ – and proves the flexibility of such a tool.

GROW is effective when…

● The Coachee
○ wants to be coached to help them move forward
○ chooses what they want to be coached on - own challenge or issue
● The Coach
○ reflects on assumptions they might have about the report that may inhibit them
from approaching the situation with a growth mindset
○ acts as a facilitator
○ listens, asks questions, reflects back, states observations, structures the
conversation towards some resolution
○ is willing to let the coachee choose their next steps
● “True” coaching does not happen often, as it’s so hard not to give advice
● (Review Continuum and “When Should I Coach” if needed)

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(G) Goal
You may start the session by simply asking; ‘What is it that you want?’ However, it is rare that you
get the perfect goal in that first instance! It is our job as coaches to delve more deeply to clarify the
goal further. Don’t be surprised if the goal evolves as it becomes clear that there is a more
powerful underlying issue than initially identified by the coachee!
● 1st Level: What do you want to achieve overall?
● 2nd Level: What is your goal for our time together today?
● Once you and the coachee feel that there is sufficient clarity in where they want to
be/do/have, you are ready to move on to the next session.

(R) Reality
Ask lots of questions. Don’t be surprised if you have to go back to the goal and clarify it again. It
is important to ascertain the real situation, and also to attempt objectivity from the coachee, which
is often hard for them to do without some good coaching questions. Try to get the coachee to use
all their senses, and to see their situation through many different angles/perspectives, thus raising
their awareness of the self and others.

(O) Options
This is the part where you encourage the individual to be expansive and brainstorm all the potential
avenues for achieving their goals before they close down and decide on actions. Offer your own
ideas only after your direct report has shared hers/his, if at all. This is best achieved by the use of
many open questions, having built sufficient rapport with the coachee towards a state of openness
and willingness to move forward.

(W) Will
This section pulls it all together for the direct report, so they can walk away knowing how to move
toward their goal, which converts the discussion into a decision.
● This is not a prescriptive model, there is a lot of iteration and often 50% of time is on goal
refinement and reality testing circles. Important because the risk is that the goal is unclear.
● As you start to ask questions, the coachee will gather clarity in their mind about the goal,
and the journey starts to map out before them.
● It is also worth following through at the end with the real test, asking: “On a scale of 1 to
10, how likely are you to achieve this goal?” This will help both you and the coachee
really test the likelihood of success.
● Another form of confirmation may be that the coach chooses to summarize the action
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points back to the coachee, affirming the decision.

Facilitator: Share a personal story on how you have used these steps.

Part of your homework last night was to come ready with a topic in mind that you want peer
coaching on - for example, your greatest current management challenge. If you haven’t already
decided on a topic, please do so now. We’ll do some practice now, and the remainder after lunch.
Are there any questions before we begin?

Coaching Activity in Trios

(2 mins for instructions, then 1 hour self managed: 45 min practice and ~15 min break )
● Describe roles of Coach, Coachee and Observer (3 slides)
● 45 minutes total for this activity, each person in the group will be the coach once for 12
minutes, you’ll debrief for 3 minutes afterward, and then rotate.
● Ask if there are any questions. Advise to stay in room for easy timekeeping.

Quick debrief of coaching as a group (5-10 mins depending on group’s punctuality)

Ask: “With a show of Thumbs up / sideways / down”
● When you were the Coach, do you think you provided value?
● When you were the Coachee, did you have a positive coaching experience?
● How many feel you got much more out of this exercise than expected?

Lunch (45 minutes)

Feedback (2.5 hours)

Intro to Feedback
The fact is, it can be uncomfortable to give feedback. The antidote to being uncomfortable giving
feedback is be clear about your intention and your role. Purpose

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❏ Learn SBI framework and types:

First, take a moment to think about your intention - why you want to deliver this feedback and Appreciation, Advice, or
how you intend to do it. Do you intend to help your direct report have a better career and Evaluation
experience here? Do you intend to give the feedback in a way that minimizes their sense of
❏ Learn how to balance "positive"
discomfort, but also gets the point across? Can I deliver this message with genuine empathy for
and "negative" feedback
their perspective?
❏ Learn expectation setting
❏ Avoid pitfalls of bias
Second, be clear about your role. As a person’s manager, it is absolutely your responsibility to
help that person grow— it’s irresponsible not to.

Today you’ll be learning techniques to make your feedback come across the best way possible.
Feedback, even if a little painful to hear at first, is ultimately a gift.

Activity in pairs (3 mins)

● Ask pairs to share 1-2 reasons they think giving feedback is difficult, and also 1-2
characteristics of the person they enjoy getting feedback from.

Debrief (2-3 mins)

● Drive towards this message: We like getting feedback from people we see as trustworthy
and who care about us. Build your relationships so you are seen as trustworthy and
caring. Both the message and messenger matter.
● It matters a lot what kind of relationship you have to the person receiving the feedback.
Being the right kind of messenger means:
○ Are they credible? Do we trust them?
○ Do we feel accepted? Appreciated? Like our autonomy is respected?

Written activity (mins) The intention behind this exercise is to

In your workbook, jot down the 2 most impactful pieces of feedback you've given to a member of unveil to participants that they may not
your team in the last month (or longer if needed). Also note how you delivered the feedback. realize that what they email is also
feedback, or that they only consider
something “negative” to be feedback,
This will help us keep the rest of the class feeling real to you. We’ll refer back to these examples
etc.
throughout the class.

[Hint: as you give the instructions for this activity, don’t prompt by saying “positive”, “negative”
or ways to give the feedback “over email”, “in person”, etc.]

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Keeping the Balance

● How many of you wrote down that the most impactful was positive feedback, or
negative?
● How come? [ask for examples]
● Giving someone positive feedback can be incredibly impactful.
● Direct reports are smart. You’ll see a lot that’s good.

[Move to Slide with Speech Bubbles]

● Say so. You should mention the good things you are seeing.

If you are giving enough feedback, you’ll notice a lot more things to appreciate than to fix.
Look for what is going well and say it to the direct report. You’ll find opportunities to do this
pretty frequently - so take them.

It’s important to give authentic appreciation often. Why?

● The first reason is that our minds remember “negative” feedback (when we are asked to
change) very vividly, so we need more “positive” feedback (when we are told we’re
doing the right thing, to keep it up, or that our work is appreciated). With the right
balance, a direct report feels energized and can apply that energy to make changes for
improvement.
● The second reason is that noticing what’s going well signals to your direct report that
you are paying attention, that you understand the work, and that you care. This builds a
foundation of credibility and trust: “Hey, this is a person who notices what I do.” That
foundation will make it easier for you and your direct report when you need to bring up a
“negative” piece of feedback.

How to say it: SBI

What is the best way to give feedback, or share the observations you are making about your direct
report? The formula is called SBI.

SBI stands for “Situation, Behavior, Impact”.

● Situation you want to discuss
● Behavior in the situation
● Impact of that behavior

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Positive/Appreciative Feedback: Example “A” (top) is feedback about a client discussion that
went really well.

Why should we take the time to use SBI for positive feedback? So it sticks. We often are too vague
on positive feedback - making it less memorable. “Hey great job!” Don’t make only your negative
feedback memorable! Usually, we don’t remember positive feedback as clearly as we remember
negative feedback. You might remember it for years. Negative feedback is like Velcro, but positive
feedback can roll off you like a Teflon coating.

In fact, our brains are wired to naturally seek and find negatives. We, as human beings, are already
good at that. Our brains are hardwired to respond to threats faster than registering happiness or
gratitude, so our direct reports will be listening firstly for negative feedback, and it's up to us as
Managers to create a space where positive and constructive feedback can co-mingle and not feel
like a threat. By taking the time when we give positive feedback to be really clear, to describe the
situation, behavior, and impact, we make the positive feedback memorable.

Also remember that well-meaning positive feedback about one’s intrinsic ability can actually
hinder one’s growth and receptivity to challenges, such as saying “You’re so smart.” This is the
kind of praise that causes us to get stuck in a fixed mindset.
Rather, focus on praising their process, effort, strategies, grit and/or resilience.

Constructive/Developmental Feedback: Example “B” (bottom) is an example of a presentation

to a director that didn’t go as well.

SBI is really sharing an observation. But how do you make that into something that is
actionable?
SBI & What’s Next
What comes next is a discussion and clarification, creation of options, and agreement on next
steps.

Getting to Root Cause

Why are you having to give this feedback? Let’s think about root causes.

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Root Cause: Skill or Will?

Your report still hasn’t sent you the draft presentation you expected. You are a little upset.
But why hasn’t he sent it? Is it because the report doesn’t quite know how to do it? Or is it because
the report is not motivated or lacks confidence?
● When a direct report doesn’t know how to do something, it’s SKILL.
● When a direct report isn’t motivated or lacks confidence, it’s WILL.
● You may have to ask to find out which it is.

You: “About the draft presentation, I was hoping to take a look at it. How is it going?”
● Diagnose: is the reason he gives you for why it’s not ready SKILL or WILL? Both?
● Boost SKILL with more guidance through coaching or advice.
● Boost WILL by bolstering his confidence or interest in the task.

Root Cause: Were Expectations Clear?

When you give feedback, you hope that you don’t hear these words: “Really? I didn’t know you
wanted me to do that.”

It’s easiest to give feedback when you set expectations upfront very clearly. It’s less awkward,
because you’ve set an expectation, and both the direct report and you know it. If the expectation
isn’t met, be sure to bring it up.

Special Situations
In some cases, delivering constructive/developmental feedback can be particularly challenging.
Let’s look at some examples.

Disagreement about Feedback

Even if the direct report disagrees with the Impact the Behavior had, the fact is, you are bringing
up a blind spot for them. They may have had good intentions - but, the impact it had on you is
something that may not have gone well.

Help them understand how you perceived it even if they disagree with your interpretation.
● e.g. “You may not think it’s rude to say that, but I was offended by it.”
● “You don’t think it’s a problem to do X, but I do” (for example)

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In some cases, you may need to take a breather and discuss again when calmer.

Interpersonal Feedback
This is SBI, followed by “I need” or “I want” explaining clearly what SUBSTITUTE behavior is
wanted.
[Read the example]
● I need you to wait and listen as team members give ideas.
● I want you to consider when to back down or drop an issue

Feedback Triangles
A Feedback Triangle is when a peer of your direct report comes to you, or a fellow manager
confides in you (“please don’t share this”) with insight about someone on your team. They want
you to pass along the information, instead of them. (red arrow)

What to do with that information?

● Our goal is that the information about someone travels to them the shortest distance
possible. (green arrow)
Try to put ownership on the individual who had the insight or feedback.
● Say: “Have you shared this feedback directly with her?” and/or “Does it make sense for
you to share that with her yourself? Then I can reinforce what she is learning from your
feedback.”
Why should you avoid taking it on yourself?
● You don’t have the full story. What you have heard is hearsay. The direct report will feel
upset that he wasn’t approached directly, like someone tattled on him. Adds an extra issue
because it’s from the wrong person.
● It also makes the direct report lose trust. If you have the conversation, you risk losing trust
from your direct report, and the direct report will likely lose trust with the person who
didn’t give them the feedback directly.

You can promise the person with the feedback that you will follow-up with your direct report
afterward to see how it went. Use this as a coaching opportunity - share the SBI framework with
them so that they can formulate meaningful, specific and actionable feedback.

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Feedback Practice Instructions (in original trios, 1 hour not including break)
Since giving feedback is one of the most important and challenging responsibilities of a good
manager, we of course want you to get a chance to practice it. Refer to your workbook for
instructions. Please be back here in one hour, if you leave the room.

On your own:
● Reflect and prepare using questions in workbook (up to 10 mins)

In your trios, take turns playing the roles of Manager, Direct, and Observer:
● Manager: Explain context to trio members (2 mins)
● Manager & Direct: Practice feedback conversation (5 mins)
● Observer & Direct: Give at least 1 suggestion or observation (2 mins)
● Manager & Direct: Practice the feedback conversation again (5 mins)
● ALL: Debrief and provide meta-feedback (5 mins)

Debrief (5-10 mins)

● How did this practice go for your groups?
● What was the most challenging?
● What are your main takeaways/what will you do differently?
● Any questions before we move on to the next topic?

Break (10-15 mins)

Feedback Pitfalls (5-8 mins total)

Let’s go over a couple pitfalls to avoid, especially to counteract some of our (unintentional) biases.

Quality of Feedback
Ask yourself, “Do I give the same quality of feedback to each team member?”
Often, unconsciously, we don’t. Studies show that people tend to feel more comfortable giving
feedback to people who are very like them. (You also may realize that you feel more comfortable
having a career conversation with someone like you - same university, same age, etc, and are more
open giving contacts and making connections for that person.)

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Consider all the ways you could be similar or different to your direct report - it might not simply be
a gender or race difference, but a personality or thinking type that is different. Maybe you are quiet
or understated, and your direct report is bubbly and talkative.

The more different you are, along whatever dimensions, the harder it might FEEL to coach him/her.
It's difficult, but we each need to overcome this and give feedback anyway.

You may also want to tweak your routines so you have enough time and perspective to give good
feedback for this person. Are you getting to know their projects enough? After thinking about this,
one manager decided to make his one-on-one times longer for direct reports who were in a different
office from him - so he had enough time to get into a real discussion.

Consistent Criteria
Ask yourself, “have you outlined expectations and anticipated outcomes for your direct report?”
Have you defined criteria for success for each person on the team? Using criteria that are clear
creates a sense of fairness once you start evaluating your direct report.

Another point about consistent criteria is this: as you judge the direct report’s performance or
interpersonal skills, think about how you would evaluate that behavior if it came from a different
person, e.g. a different gender or social group.

Would what the direct report did be typically seen as fine if it were done by a male, yet the direct
report is a female and is judged differently? For example, if the person said, “I completely disagree
with this direction” would you consider that aggressive if a woman said it, but assertive if a man
said it?

Be mindful of these biases and hold yourself accountable to applying clear criteria consistently.
(insert example: assertive/driven vs aggressive/pushy)

Filtering Based on Assumptions

Ask yourself, “Do I sometimes filter what I say based on assumptions, and can I avoid it?” We
sometimes make assumptions about what a person wants or doesn’t want. What are some common
pivots that assumptions can be made upon?

For example: “That direct report has a child and probably wouldn’t be interested in a role on our
team that could involve a lot of travel, so I won’t bring it up." Instead, you should bring it up

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anyway, or just announce it to the team as a whole.

And lastly, don't assume that you cannot provide honest advice to someone because they "may not
be able to handle it". Assumptions are often made based on unconscious stereotypes or biases of a
particular group, and the key is to keep communication and messaging consistent for all. Bottom
line, say it anyway, but say it nicely.

Making Sure You are Understood

Ask yourself: “Am I making sure my message was accurately understood?” Think about it: even
twins could misunderstand each other.

The more differences there are between you and the other person, the higher the possibility that
your message wasn’t received quite as intended. It goes through more filters and cultural
assumptions getting to the other person than you may anticipate.

You might say to your housekeeper: “The floor is dirty” meaning “The floor is dirty. Let’s get it
on the list to clean,“ but your housekeeper might think, “Are you going to fire me?”

Ask to see what the direct report has understood and clarify the message if needed. Eg., pause and
say, “Let me check, did you remember it differently? How do you see it?”

Feedback Pitfalls Recap

1. Give each direct report the same quality of feedback, no matter how different each is from
you.
2. Set up consistent criteria about what the direct report will accomplish so there is a sense
of fairness as the direct report progresses and is evaluated.
3. Avoid filtering your feedback by what you assume the direct report may or may not want
or care about; instead, discuss your feedback with the direct report in a compassionate
way.
4. Make sure the direct report (or your twin brother Eddie) understands what you really
mean. Be sure to ask, “Is this making sense? How do you feel about this? Are there things
I’m saying that you disagree with?”

Think to yourself: “Which of these can I commit to doing better on? Why?”
[Give a moment for people to think. If group is conducive, ask a few people to share what they
thought, even just a 30 second discussion.]

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Alan Eustace Quote (former Google SVP)

“Silence guarantees nothing will change”

It’s your challenge and responsibility as a manager to say something, even if it’s difficult. That is
at the heart of developing people and making our company a better place.
Use SBI!

Decision Making (2 hours)

Decision Making
With this next section on decision making, we’re broadening the tools and practices to include the
role a manager plays in decision making. The added complexity is in using the previous tools and Purpose
practices in the context of a team. ❏ Increase awareness about
managers’ “default decision
Ask the group to discuss at their tables:(10 mins) making style”
● Recall two decisions you found difficult to make in your team(s) ❏ Equip managers with several
● What made them difficult? decision making strategies and
● How were opposing views handled and what was the impact? context for when to use each
❏ Simulate decision making within a
group under pressure to test
Debrief (5 mins)
strategies
The purpose of asking these questions is to elicit the kinds of issues and concerns they raise about
decision making. When they report out their responses, categorize their answers into concerns
about people, process, and structure.

E.g. We can’t seem to come to an agreement (people), we don’t know who the decision maker is
(process). When reviewing the list, remind participants that we will be covering tools that can
help with process, and we will be covering practices for helping the people interaction during
decision making.

Opposing views are critical to explore using strong listening skills and open-ended questions
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because they uncover data and validate/include those with diverse points of view. Ultimately, we
can arrive at better, more informed decisions. Let’s look at some skills that can support you in this
balancing act.

Balancing Advocacy and Inquiry

We need to balance these skills in decision making conversations in order to build a robust
conversation that tests our ideas out loud and works toward making informed decisions that will be
supported.

Typically we lead with advocacy. By including (even leading with) more inquiry, you expand the
pool of information while making others feel heard/included. As a leader, summarizing what has
been heard and the path forward builds credibility and clarifies understanding.

● Advocacy
○ State views directly, while open to influence
○ Be explicit about your reasoning, interests, concerns & conclusions
○ Offer examples & data
○ Make points one at a time
● Inquiry
○ Explore other's reasoning, concerns and interest
○ Encourage challenge, questions and feedback
○ Test your understanding
○ Solicit a range of ideas
● Summary
○ Synthesize the others’ views in your own words
○ Test your understanding of the others’ concerns
○ Capture their full meaning; express their situation

Decision Framework (5 mins)

Use these questions to shine a light on the decisions made in your team:

[WHAT] are you solving for and are the objectives clear to everyone?
● Address root causes, not situational fixes
● Establish priorities for what to tackle (and what's out of scope)

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● Anticipate outcomes by defining success criteria at the onset

● Consider ways to simplify or tweak existing structures and look for solutions that scale
[WHY] What’s at stake (if you do it or don’t do it) and why is it important?
● Does it solve a business need and/or is good for the company longer term?
● Is this a good use of time?
● Does this fit in with other current priorities?

Keeping in mind that emotions are data, take stock of how you and others feel about the decision
at hand. Consider, for example, why people care and what they stand to lose.

[WHO] Is everyone clear who the decision maker is?

● Default to open: listen and ask questions
● Be generous with providing context—it’ll enable others to do their jobs better
● Give people the benefit of the doubt and assume positive intent

[HOW] will the decision be made (e.g., consensus driven; how will data be used)?
● Define your exception criteria (which should rarely apply)
● Make tradeoffs explicit
● Help scale good judgment by communicating rationale for decision after it is made

[WHEN] can people expect a decision?

● Be transparent about what decision was made and how it will be communicated
● If elements of the decision making process change or are delayed, communicate that to all
stakeholders

Decision Making Choices

This is a tool that can help you as a manager understand how you want to make a decision. Not all
decisions are the same, so you can use different ways to reach a decision. On the continuum you
can start on the left side in Tell / Sell. Here, the owner of the decision makes the decision
themselves and announces it. These are fast decisions; the challenge is that you won’t get as much
ownership from others, but for expediency, it’s worth it. On the other side you have
Consent/Consensus. This kind of decision takes longer than others, and the ownership is much
greater. In between, you can take the position of Consult. Can anyone tell us the difference of a
Consult decision?

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The importance of a Consult decision is that the owner of the decision announces that s/he will
still make the decision; however, they are influenceable by input from the group. You can tell the
group where you are leaning or not, but you are persuadable. Often groups will fall back to
Consult when they experience being stuck in Consent/Consensus and time is of essence. But be
aware that if you shift from Consensus to Consult, you aren’t doing it too soon. You also want to
take care to announce the shift and get agreement from all.

When you Delegate, you are giving the ownership of a decision to an individual who then owns
the decision and decides how s/he wants to make the decision.

What types of decisions are mainly used here? How do you see groups making decisions?

Consent / Consensus
One nuance to decision making in a group is the difference between Consensus and Consent. It’s
subtle and useful. Consent means that I can live with it. I may not believe it is the most elegant or
best way to go at the problem, but I can live with it. Consensus means that I believe, along with
everyone else, that this is the best way to approach the issue. In Consensus, I don’t agree until I
believe it’s the best decision. Using Consent can help people size up the importance of the
decision and test whether they can live with the decision, given its importance and the need for
speed.

Other challenges
Let’s frame up two additional challenges to be aware of when managing decision making. One is
our cognitive biases.

Unconscious Biases
So when it comes to decision making, the neuroscientists and cognitive researchers tell us that
initially we make decisions by intuition, and then we reflect and rationalize it. Our confirmation
bias has us build a rationale with data that supports our initial decision. We have to work with our
biases so that we can learn and question this tendency.

There are other biases as well. The availability bias subverts us to believe we’ve gotten all the
information required and we don’t test further. In groups, members tend to believe they don’t need
to go outside the group for missing data. The anchoring effect is common in performance reviews
because we’ve made a judgment given our last impression. And as humans, we’re more averse to
losing something than to seeing the potential for gain. In-group Bias is the tendency for people to
give preferential treatment to others they perceive to be members of their own groups.
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The main points that we should take from these and other biases is that we can be more humble in
our convictions, and that our goal in decision making is to reach the most informed decision with
the best internal commitment. Because of our unconscious biases, our personal goal should be to
be Less Wrong.

Emotional Triggers
The second challenge for us in the interpersonal realm is that we will get emotionally triggered
when making decisions, because we should be bringing up differences in opinions and judgments,
and when these start to cross the line to the personal arena, we can “flip our lids.” When we are
triggered—when we feel threatened or embarrassed—we will fight, flee, or freeze. We start
thinking the other person is crazy and won’t listen to reason. We believe we have the answers and
that they just don’t get it. I start limiting what I say, for fear that it will explode the room or that it
will be a career-limiting move. What we learned yesterday is that when we’re emotionally
triggered, we need to reappraise and reframe our thinking and feelings in the moment.

Overcoming Biases & Triggers Through Reappraisal

We can overcome our Biases and Triggers by reappraising our attitudes. Here’s where our internal
voice, our internal coach, needs to help us listen to what’s firing off in our minds, just below the
surface of awareness.

The inner coach can suggest other things to tell ourselves. We can shift our internal voice from: “I
need to push my point harder, they don’t get it. How I see this situation is true. They need to come
around,” to “Let me slow down and be intentional with my response, I have a strong perspective
and it’s one of many, let me suspend judgement for the moment to listen to the others first, then
respond with mine and see if I can move the conversation to what’s best for the company. I may
not have THE one/only best idea.”

Decision Making Considerations

● Declare the style of decision making upfront, early in the discussion.
● Be aware of your preferred or “default” decision style. Stretch yourself; learn to use all
styles for different situations.
● Balance the need for speed with the need for buy-in. Teams acting on decisions may see
an accelerated time to implement if the time is taken to gain buy-in.
● If you know the answer and are not going to be influenced by others’ views, don’t
involve them.

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RACI (15 mins)

Who has experience with RACI? How did it go, who was part of creating it and what was the
context?

There are many models we could use for decision making and role clarity. This type of tool will be
most useful when you’ve gone through a reorganization, added members to your team, or changed
your organizational focus. We'd like to focus on identifying who makes the decision, who has
input but no decision making authority, and how we communicate the decision to all relevant
parties. Using RACI can help simplify complex projects -- including those with multiple
stakeholders -- by helping project managers clarify decision making.

The goals are to provide role definition to team members and increase transparency in decision
making, especially in a matrix organization or a cross functional project team.

● R–Responsible - Who will do the work to complete the task? The R is executing to
make something happen. There can be multiple Rs for a task.
● A–Accountable - Who will make the final decision? The A owns the process,
problem, or project. There usually should only be one A per deliverable/task.
● C–Consult - Who needs to be consulted? They have knowledge and may make
recommendations and help with decisions. There might be many Cs, both within and
external to the team.
o Who to consult
▪ Start by asking, “Who else cares?” so you can generate a list of
people and identify which RACI roles they might fit into.
▪ Even if the A is clear, you may need to consult with more senior
people because they could potentially question or overrule a
decision later, so it’s important to make sure you understand their
views and positions on the topic.
▪ You may need to consult with R’s, to make sure you understand
how they see the task.
▪ You may need to consult with people who have expertise, strong
opinions, or vested interests on the topic, or who are responsible for
people and resources that are necessary to implement the decision.
o Positioning
▪ It’s helpful to be clear with C’s that you value their input, and that
you are trying to balance the needs and interests of multiple

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stakeholders.
▪ Depending on the scope and complexity of the decision, sometimes
C’s should be consulted early in the process to define their needs
and desires for the decision, and then later to preview the likely
decision or a couple of options under consideration.
● I–Inform - Who needs to be informed? They don’t need to be consulted, just
informed after a decision is made. There might be many I’s, both within and external
to the team.

Each person involved in a process is identified as R, A, C, or I. An individual can have

multiple roles, and any role can have multiple people doing it (except for “A”)

Share quick example from your own work (either where you used RACI with success or where
using it could have led to a better outcome)

Good questions to ask to identify C’s and sometimes I’s is, “Who else cares about this issue or
decision?” and “What’s the history and context of this issue?” Those are the people or teams
you will want to include at the beginning and ensure their roles in decision making are clear.
Asking, “Who else cares?” can help identify these stakeholders early in the process.Sometimes
roles are predetermined, and you want to be clear that you need to have certain people in
certain roles. Do your best not to give an illusion of choice if there is no choice to be made.

Stakeholders may disagree with assigned roles. It is important that after roles are assigned
everyone is in agreement about the assignments (e.g., the A needs to know he or she is an A
and be ready to be held accountable). In some cases it may be possible to define roles in
collaboration with stakeholders to arrive at consensus.

RACI Example
● Review your chart and be aware of:
○ No R’s or too many R’s
○ No A’s or more than one A
○ Lot’s of C’s or lots of I’s

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Afternoon Break (15 minutes)

Action Planning & Program Close (45 minutes)

Action Planning & Program Close

Action planning allows you to reflect on what was covered during the program so far and decide
how you want to apply the content to your development as a manger. You will be more Purpose
successful if you develop areas that you care about. Consider also what you think your team ❏ Energize participants to
most needs— if you can align your passions with the team’s needs, you will find a path of least continue their development
resistance to development. ❏ Bring the days to a meaningful
close and celebrate their time &
Plan Your Development (Individually, ~up to 10 mins) commitment to this journey
● Refer to your workbook for some guiding questions to plan your development
● Consider the many resources and feedback tools at your disposal, as well as insights
gained from discussions with your peers (e.g. from coaching session)

Meet with your Trio (30 mins)

● Sit with your trio. Share your action plans at a high level, and get feedback
● Schedule a follow-up meeting with your trio to check in and support each other
● Last but not least, take some time to share appreciation with the people in your trio—
be specific with your feedback!

Revisiting the Value Proposition of Managers (2 mins)

● (optional) ask someone to read quote on slide: “Success is when I add value to myself.
Significance is when I add value to others.” — John Maxwell
● Recall the exercise we did on the morning of day 1, looking at the ways managers can
add or subtract value
● Hopefully, by now you feel better equipped with some new practices to confidently add
value in your new role, both to yourself and to others

Closing Circle (5-8 mins)

● Everyone please gather in a circle so we can bring these days to a close
● As we go around, please share a closing thought/takeaway with the group
○ The briefer the better! 1-3 words/phrase if possible
● Thank participants, remind to complete feedback forms (if available).

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Google’s New Manager Program
Facilitator Guide

Program Ends

This content is from rework.withgoogle.com (the "Website") and may be used for non-commercial purposes in accordance with the terms of use set forth on the Website.
45