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Mind Games Report

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192 views28 pages

Mind Games Report

Uploaded by

Pelican
Copyright
© © All Rights Reserved
We take content rights seriously. If you suspect this is your content, claim it here.
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1

All Rights Reserved.

Copyright © Alex Carter and makeherdesireyou.com

No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form


or by any means, electrical or mechanical, including photocopying
and recording, or by any information storage or retrieval system
without permission in writing from the author.

Disclaimer:

This book is written for informational purposes only. The author


has
made every effort to make sure the information is complete and
accurate. All attempts have been made to verify information at the
time of this publication and the authors do not assume any
responsibility for errors, omissions, or other interpretations of the
subject matter. The publisher and author shall have neither liability
nor responsibility to any person or entity with respect to any loss
or
damage caused or alleged to be caused directly or indirectly by this
book.

2
A guy once asked me - "Alex! How do I stand
out in a girl’s mind?"

I gave him a two word answer - "Be dramatic!"

"Oh! But don't girls hate drama?" He asked.

I said "They hate ugly drama, but love the positive kind".

Can drama be positive? After all, most people have been


conditioned to view ‘drama’ on the same level as physical
violence and deception.

For many people, drama is naturally spoken in the same breath


as things like ‘bad’ and ‘breakup’; however, this is only when
we’re considering nothing but the most negative connotations.

We’ve now been faced with an intriguing question that asks


whether or not the effects of drama, which are almost
universally seen as corrosive to relationships, can actually be
turned into something that is conducive to a stronger level of
attraction; is this all a load of bunk, or it is really possible to
strike that balance?

Absolutely yes, it is.

It is far more than possible, it is actually highly recommendable.


Think about why the period before two people finally admit
their love for one another is perceived as being so romantic.

Consider the reasons why almost every famous love story deals
with two people coming to terms with the challenges associated

3
with their feelings, rather than two people with absolutely no
obstacles or uncertainty surrounding their love.

Why is it that we seem to be so obsessed with the notion of


conflict and doubt?

It’s because, ironically, there is almost nothing more romantic


and sensual than drama. Displays of blatant affection can
definitely be romantic in their own right, but if they’re not met
with some kind of excitement that accompanies a twinge of
doubt; this is because there’s no more ‘stake’ in the equation.

We love the feeling of drama in the same way that some people
love to sprinkle salt on their sweet food before their eat it; the
saltiness, even though it’s a direct opposite to the sweetness,
manages to draw out a more intense level of sweetness because
of the contrast.

They say that distance makes the heart grow fonder, but why do
you think that is?

It’s because it makes us appreciate the kind of thing that we


rarely ever appreciate anything else just as much; the thing that
we can’t have.

From the moment that we are able to categorize objects in our


environment as “mine” and “not mine”, a dichotomy is born;
things that are easy to touch, and things that aren’t easy to
touch.

The things that aren’t easy to touch present a challenge and


compel us to try harder to achieve them. The very reason that
we strive for lofty goals is because we have natural proclivity to

4
be drawn towards things that we cannot easily achieve
overnight.

In terms of a relationship, or even just casual courtship, the


relation between the contrast of availability and exclusiveness
becomes apparent very quickly.

Just as we often begin to take the things that we own and use
every day for granted (just like children take their toys for
granted), even the most wholesome relationship can become
stale if it starts to seem a little bit too ‘accessible’.

A man that’s courting a woman and introduces absolutely no


sense of exclusiveness will, similarly, be treated as though they
are simply accessible and unexciting.

Enter the element of drama, made to spice things up and satisfy


our latent desire for things that challenge us and elude us.

Drama obviously has its well-documented consequences, but as


they say, “everything in moderation.” Consider the volume of a
high-tempo song. When the DJ turns the music up in the club, it
sends waves of rejuvenation through the crowd and breathes
heavy waves of new life into the whole party.

If the DJ were able to crank the music up to a level beyond the


capacity of human hearing, however, the party would cease to
be enjoyable. Everybody’s eardrums would rupture, and the fun
time would become an absolute nightmare.

Take this graphic image and apply it to the concept of drama; in


moderation, drama makes things fun, but too much drama isn’t

5
fun for anyone. You’ve got to become an expert in successfully
manipulating the strings of drama to operate in your favor, in a
productive way that doesn’t leave anybody hurt!

Let me first give you some odd, but true realities of life.

Reality #1 - People live very boring lives. The average person’s


day is far from bursting with excitement and new experiences.

Too many adults fall prey to the predator of their own routine;
they become trapped in an endless limbo of the same
mechanical rituals performed every single day. To a lot of
people, genuine enjoyment of life is more of an occasional
privilege than a constant pleasure.

Reality # 2 - People are desperate for some excitement. People’s


desperation for excitement is the very reason that our society
has such a chronic fixation on things like drama.

Drama creates anxiety due to the fact that it toys with the notion
of loss, and when we are on the verge of losing something, we
start to become painfully reminded of all of the things that
actually make that something worth it.

People’s boring lives are often drama-free, which is why so


many people turn to the exploits of celebrities in an attempt to
vicariously absorb some of that anxious drama.

People are boring, and many people are bored with boring
people. The average person’s day isn’t filled with a trove of new
and interesting information. Where there could be new
discoveries or sensations to share, there is a void that’s typically
filled with social media posts or celebrity gossip.

6
A woman that’s fed up with dealing with people who bring
nothing at all exciting to the table is highly likely to be drawn to
people who break that mold.

A non-boring person is a person who simply can’t be fully


predicted. A boring person’s sentences can be finished before
they’ve even opened their mouths, but an exciting person can’t
be predicted in either their next word or their next action; for
this reason, people who introduce drama are often warmly
received even though their actions might seem abrasive and
downright unpleasant at times.

Some women really rather would be with someone that is


slightly dysfunctional, but exciting, than with someone who is
absolutely perfect but introduces no ‘wild card’ element to the
relationship.

People’s lives are boring too. It seems like a harsh way to put it,
but even they themselves will generally admit to the fact that
their lives aren’t exactly treasure troves of breakneck fun and
wonder. They look forward to vacations and weekends with the
same enthusiasm that convicts have when longing for their
escape from a longtime imprisonment.

A woman who has had a long string of relationships with boring


people is likely to have a jaded view of men who attempt to tell
her their life stories; she’s heard it all and seen it all. When a
man enters her life that truly rocks the boat in ways she never
expected, she may be at a loss as for how to actually react to the
sudden shift in dynamic.

She’ll be concerned, maybe a bit nervous, maybe slightly off-put,


but the important thing is that she will be anything but bored.

7
The change in pace will entertain and engage her more than it
bothers her.

Because of the fear of another boring day,


people reluctantly get out of bed every
morning.

Every day is like another trial for them to endure, another


expanse of stolen time to work through until their dues have
been properly paid. For them, the rising sun is like a jailer that
takes over the when the moon warden has finished his
graveyard shift.

For many women who feel trapped in a constant cycle of


monotonous things and people, a man with a strong presence
who can introduce a sensation of unpredictability and
adventure will be like a breath of fresh air.

Even if the drama isn’t always entirely pleasant, it will be a


welcome change to being completely unmoved by what’s
entirely expected and boring in everyday life.

Surprises, be they pleasant or unpleasant, are unified in the


invigorating element of change and unpredictability; a man
that’s a never-ending volley of surprises is a man that should be
held onto, because it means that her life is guaranteed to never
be as boring as it used to be again.

Any change is always worth the escape from the purgatory of


living every single day just as we did the previous day!

In the morning, boring people


reluctantly drag themselves into the bathroom and
reluctantly brush their teeth.

8
They groom themselves for another day that they perceive as
tedious punishment, hoping to at least look as presentable as
possible before their skin is conquered with stress wrinkles.

When a woman has a man in her life that she’s expecting to


surprise her at any moment, she’ll go through her morning
routine with a sense of anticipation.

She’ll wake up in the morning, excited, because she’s simply


unsure of just what way her man is going to make her feel on
that day. Simply by being unpredictable, the morning becomes
less of a routine and more of a preparation for a day with a real
sense of momentum and dynamism.

Bored people in the rat race


reluctantly get into the car and reluctantly drive to work.

On the way, they join thousands of others that are in a similar


bind with the maddening monotony of their self-imposed life
sentences.

It’s a long and somber march of the damned, the dissatisfied,


and the bored; five days a week, eight hours a day. For a person
in an unpredictable relationship, however, life itself is a constant
breathtaking rollercoaster ride.

The drive in the car is one thing, but it’s nothing compared to
the ride that a person who is close to you can give you when
you’re not able to get a pin on exactly what they’re thinking or
doing.

It truly is a shame that so many men and women go through life


without knowing the excitement of a slightly turbulent romance.

9
Because their lives are so painfully predictable, they lack the
kind of incentive that entices people in the throes of courtship
to wake up and face the day.

The one without any drama or variation in their lives do not


always suffer ignorantly; they may long for a wild element in
their lives, but unfortunately, there is nothing and no one to
provide it for them. These poor souls ask themselves...

"Oh boy! Here comes another day,


another boring, long and hard day."

After many years of running through


this circle of hell, most people turn into something that could be
called a coordinated, talking zombie that is chronically starved
for excitement instead of human brains.

Being sapped of the energy to go about their lives with no sense


of excitement, their motivation suffers and negatively effects the
more practical elements of their lives in the process.

By contrast, people who are able to draw excitement from the


ebbs and flows of their romance are never in a state that can be
called ‘bored’; they are either dealing with or anticipating the
next move of their significant other, or significant other-to-be.

When a man becomes a woman’s sense of unpredictability and


excitement, he becomes something that permeates just about
every aspect of her life that doesn’t seem to directly concern
him.

She’s going to be seeking this man out, not just because he’s
physically attractive or rich, but also because she’s thirsty for

10
something to break the monotonous mold of life with no
tension. He will become a source of energy that she can draw
from and use to propel her in other aspects of her day.

Believe it or not, most girls are absolutely desperate to find a


man who is simply exciting. Older women especially, who have
been around the block and have just about had their fill of the
typical dull guys who attempt impressing them with their
nothing-to-write-home-about anecdotes.

You will hear many women talk about how they’d prefer a man
who has X, Y and Z qualities, but the truth is that it’s only the
idea of these things that they find attractive.

Any man who is nothing more than what another woman thinks
he should be will eventually become dreadfully predictable, and
as a result, he’ll become boring.

A woman romanticizes the picture of the perfect man in the


same way that we often romanticize new gadgets or clothes that
we don’t have in our possession yet; as long as we don’t have it,
it’s something that we just can’t rest until we get out hands on.

What happens when we actually do get it, though, and two or


three months pass down the line?

That perfect clothing item, the one that we accurately predicted


would look good on us, is no longer attached to a sense of
anticipation and longing.

We can easily predict what we’ll look like putting it on the


morning, because we’ve already worn it a hundred times before.
The very reason that clothes go “out of style” is due to the fact

11
that the fashion world eventually grows used to those clothes,
and once that happens, they’re just no longer as enticing to
fixate over.

When we romanticize things that we predict will be enjoyable,


we’re just romanticizing the feeling of not yet having it; once we
have it, the romance is over and acclimation begins.

Unfortunately, we can become acclimated to people as well. Not


seeing someone increases the sentiment surrounding that
person, because we’re given a taste of something we’re missing
out on.

Drama that surrounds a man or woman we’re interested in, in a


similar vein, creates a sense of longing that keeps things
exciting. We pursue the satisfaction of an answer for their
confusing and unpredictable behavior, but in the weirdest way,
we’re actually more attracted to that unpredictability than not.

For all of these reasons, a lot of women are constantly on the


lookout for a partner that can successfully break the mold.

They want a man that can help them break out of the same old
agonizingly slow routine they’ve identified as daily life.

They are hungry for someone whose presence


alone can electrify the atmosphere around them.

Even if they themselves aren’t present for the exciting exploits


of an exciting person, they will be able to sense the residual
afterglow of an exciting person’s energy and draw some
legitimate pleasure from it.

12
A dramatic man doesn’t simply create drama by acting strangely,
but also tends to do and get involved in things are far from
typical.

A woman that catches wind of the volatile nature of a man’s free


and immeasurable intentions will be unable to help being
slightly attracted to it. Intelligence itself is seen as attractive
because it implies that the person’s mind is a trove of unknown
information, and we’re eager to find out about what else lies
inside.

Women also want a man who can make them shout and
cry with absolute delight. The adventurous, cultured and
exciting man is like the physical incarnation of an all-expenses-
paid vacation to an exotic place.

For an escape from the daily monotony of their work life, all that
they really have to do is ask this man how his weekend has been
to instantly be pulled out of their slow and somber rut.

In being exposed to the electric energy of a truly exciting


partner, these women may actually even be inspired and
transformed into exciting people themselves; it’s more than just
romance, it’s like a shot at a completely renewed life altogether.

Considering the alternative, which is life in the constant


purgatory of monotonous work, it’s no wonder why women are
so eager to lose themselves in the embrace of an unconventional
and intriguing mate.

But...

And it's a huge and heavy "BUT".

13
"MOST MEN DON'T KNOW HOW TO DO IT"

Of course all men are relatively familiar with –what- an exciting


person does, but unfortunately, they aren’t entirely sure about
how to go about actually –becoming- this exciting man.

They lack the initiative or creativity to come up with their own


ways to be interesting, and when it doesn’t work, they resort to
cookie cutter tactics that might just wind up boring the woman
even more than she already was in the first place.

Most men take the old and standard


approach. They try to offer food to a woman, who is already full.

They will believe that more attention will equate to more


positive responses, which couldn’t be further from the truth.

Remember when we talked about the concept of moderation,


and how it can be compared to controlling the volume of music
at a party? The give-and-take approach is extremely vital.

They key is - You have to make her hungry first and


then make her absolutely starve. That's when
she will enjoy whatever you offer him. You know the parts in a
pop song where the music suddenly lowers or stops altogether
before returning with a crash of bass or increased tempo?

There’s a reason for that: the anticipation and nervous energy


created from that sudden contrast. You’ve can’t just overload a
woman with the privilege of your constant attention and date
ideas; you’ve got to introduce some ebb and flow to the

14
equation, let her imagination take the wheel in your moments of
absence, and then make a thunderous return for twice the
effect.

Unless you can make her super hungry to a


point of starvation, you won't stand out
in her mind.

If you constantly adhere to the same pattern in treatment


towards her, you’ll become another constant in her life that
matches the monotony of a commute and work schedule.

The last thing that you want to do is become assimilated into the
daily monotony that she already experiences in her daily
routine; to avoid this, you’ve just got to be consistently
inconsistent. Let your attention dip and rise, liberally, and you’ll
see that you can always keep her excitement fresh.

Men who are absolute naturals with women


understand how to not just keep a woman
emotionally starved, but they also know
exactly when and how to feed her and intensify
her interest.

There are clearly a lot of men who are better at it than others,
but it’s nothing that can’t be learned with adequate experience.
Once you get the hang of it, it’s truly like riding a bike; only
instead of a bike, you’re riding the wavelengths of the woman’s
very mind.

They use a specific strategy to do it: I call that strategy the art of
playing mind games the right way.

Mind games do NOT have to be callous manipulation; they can


instead be considered a healthy and fun method of romantic

15
preservation!

Think of it like that blockbuster


movie which keeps you on the edge of your
seat, and sends you on a joy ride of good, bad
and ugly emotions.

There’s a reason that movies which are predictable are called


‘formulaic’, which is never meant to be a compliment.

A story that can be effortlessly predicted has no sense of stake


or sense of pace, and due to that, it’s incredibly hard to engage
the narrative; the same applies when it comes to everyday
people that you interact with!

This is the formula to getting a woman to like


you on a deep emotional level: you’ve got to flip the triggers that
activate her feelings of anxiety and anticipation.

By making your presence more of an occasion than a regularity,


you move away from being the thing that no man wants to be
with a brand new prospect: available. Availability presents
absolutely no challenge.

Let me go a little deeper and explain the


concept of being liked in a way you probably
wouldn't have heard before.

=> What is "LIKING" really?

We like someone when they make us feel good, but there’s


more. Liking implies more than just tolerating a person’s

16
presence while they’re physically present; liking implies that
you genuinely desire prolonged periods of time spent with a
person and would prioritize their company over most others.

And how do you make someone really like you? You do it by


making them feel good.

=> How can you make someone feel good?

You can do it by being fascinating. As we mentioned before, a lot


of people are perpetually bored souls who would give anything
to break through their everyday pangs of numbing normalcy.

You’ve got to bring something new to the table, which is as easy


as just being a fulfilled and wholly realized person in a world
that’s overrun with automatons.

=> How do I become fascinating?

Being fascinating is easier said than done, but it still isn’t as


hard as most people seem to believe. Being fascinating doesn’t
mean that you to completely reinvent the wheel when it comes
to the things that you say and do; in the modern world, being
fascinating is just as easy as breaking the monotonous mold of
what most people perceive as ‘normal’ behavior.

As humans we are always on the lookout for


new and effective ways for emotional stimulation, and so these
things should become high on your list of priorities to pursue.

You will never find someone saying - "Oh! I'm


looking for a boring movie, can you recommend
something?"

17
Because everyone wants to feel emotionally engaged.

=> And how do you emotionally engage someone?

You can emotionally engage a person by creating some positive


drama; as we mentioned before, a little moderation of the
drama you instill can go a very long way.

=> How do I create positive drama?

You do it by using a combination of showing a lot of interest and


then disinterest. Once you’ve mastered the ability of creating a
genuine flow of give-and-take, creating positive drama will be
like a second nature for you.

Some men may be unsure about the ethics of creating positive


drama, but there is no need to be apprehensive. If anything,
positive drama is far more favorable than none at all, which will
eventually deteriorate into monotony and cause even the most
seemingly solid relationships to fall apart from a pronounced
lack of interest.

I was coaching a guy a few months ago that had turned into an
absolute master of this art. He recently met a girl who was
wishy-washy about him and he shared the exact process with
me on how he managed to trigger crazy levels of attraction
within her.

You should never feel as though you have to dedicate every


single waking moment to the pursuit of just one girl out of all of
the rest, of course, but you should definitely be aware of this
technique’s power to alter the tide of just about any romantic
conquest.

18
During one of his conversations with this new girl, this man that
I was coaching said the following to her…

"Ashley! You're a very good looking girl. I


really find you to be attractive. However,
I'm not too sure if we would get along in
other ways."

Confused she asked...

"What other ways are you referring to?"

Then he said...

"You know what! Leave it! Let's just see


where things go between us."

After he said this, he indirectly opened an emotional loop in


Ashley’s mind by showing
interest and mixing it with disinterest.

The comment was just concrete enough to display some genuine


interest from him being more than only platonic friends, but
open-ended enough so that it gave Ashley some room to
genuinely think about what he might have truly meant by saying
it.

It may sound a bit confusing, but this technique hinges upon


being sort of loose and tight at the same time; you’re directly
expressing genuine attraction, but you’re instilling a sense of
concern in her mind by voicing some doubts about the whole
thing. She won’t be able to easily categorize you, and just like
that, you will have become a person of interest.

Consequently, he could see that Ashley was

19
showing a truckload of interest in him after he made the
comment. Even after he made the comment, however, things
didn’t simply end right there.

Our story now moves to the scene of a romantic dinner; my


client and Ashley were on their third date.

They arrived at her place, and as she was getting out


of the car, he asked her to wait and tried to kiss her.

As he leaned in to kiss her, she hesitated a


little but still let him kiss her...

Then after a few seconds, he pushed her back


a little and said - "You know! This is a
little weird."

And then pulled her back and said...

"Heck! Come here, you smell so good and started to kiss her
again."

And then...

He pushed her back again said..."Look we


shouldn't be doing this."

"Why"...She asked.

"I don't know" he replied. "I like you a lot


but it feels a little odd."

After saying that, he drove off as Ashley stood there wondering


in surprise.

Over the next few days, he got a ton of


texts and phone calls from Ashley, but that

20
wasn't the main thing.

Because of his unpredictable behavior, he had reeled Ashley in


by a hook of intrigue and desire to have answers. He had been
direct in the right places, but his indirect moves kept her
wanting more by the end of the night.

By expertly playing his passive and aggressive cards, he


managed to strike a fire within Ashley that wouldn’t go out until
she was satisfied with a full sense of understanding. My client
was passionate and engaging, but at the same time, he was far
from being ‘available’.

The surprising thing about this whole


situation was that he had never
experienced this kind of interest from a woman before.

He had Ashley fully wrapped around his finger, and he had


somehow managed to accomplish it by actually doing less as
opposed to more.

So how and why did this work, you wonder? Well, it’s because
my student successfully mixed interest with disinterest.

An ordinary person that fits the monotonous mold of traditional


relationship mechanics is likely to equate increased attention
with increased attraction, but this way of thinking is extremely
misguided; my client had effectively broken out of the expected
mold, the kind that would almost seem to support common
sense, and turn the entire game on its head by acting in a
completely unconventional manner.

In simpler terms, he politely rejected her, and in the process,

21
he got her attention and triggered her instinct to chase. Instead
of trying to be a master chaser, as so many men aspire to be, my
client instead elected to be the kind of person that Ashley and
other women would feel compelled to go after with the same
kind of intent and enthusiasm that a lot of men chase women
with.

You don’t want to have to constantly fight to ‘win her over’; it’s
much more satisfying to completely level the playing field
instead of feeling as though you’ve got to put in all of the work
in the equation.

You’ve got to really be able to make sure that the ball is always
in your court, to always have her on the defensive, and for each
of your moves to leave her anxious and full of energy to engage.

Even though she’ll be the one pursuing you, you’ll still be the
one that’s truly in control. You’ll become a new kind of
dominant man in the game of attraction; you’ll be the lure, not
the desperate chaser.

If you want to flip the odds even more in your favor, there are
additional steps that can be taken.
You can tune this process up a notch and say things like this to a
girl...

"Hey Ashley! I had an amazing time with you


today, you are such a wonderful girl, however,
I am not too sure if we would be good for
each other."

Now on one end you're saying she is a


wonderful girl, but on the other end, you are also rejecting her.
You’re giving her a clear green light of availability, but
immediately after that, you shut the door and leave her

22
wondering exactly what just happened. She’ll have gotten a
straight and direct answer out of you, but it will not satisfy her;
it will only increase her level of longing for you to find out more
and solve the complete mystery.

This leads to a weird yet addictive effect on any girl’s mind and
she can’t help but feel crazy levels of attraction for you when
you use this. Here are some more quick examples of how you
can use the interest-disinterest formula…

You - You're the kind of girl who makes me sad...


Her – Why?
You – Well, you also make me happy sometimes, this is just
weird. Let’s change the subject.

By saying something like this, you’re doing a couple of things.


For one, you’re emotionally engaging the girl. You’re showing
her a level of vulnerability that’s endearing, which most men
may be far too caught up in their own pride to openly display.

On the other hand, you’re also tempering that display of


vulnerability with a real element of uncertainty. You’re making
her think not only of you, but also her own qualities.

She’ll wonder about what she might have ever done or said to
make you feel the things that you imply, and in the process,
she’ll become more self-conscious.

Once she’s become more self-conscious, you can consider your


work more or less done; you’ve almost completely tipped the
balance of power into your court, and from that point on, your
only job is simply to maintain it the best you can.

23
She will be checking herself from that point on, carefully
considering the things that she says and does in order to get a
better idea of how she affects you.

You’ll become like an object of study for her, something she’ll


fixate on in her private time and fiddle with like a stubborn
Rubik’s Cube.

You – You’re such a nice girl, but you’re also evil at times.
Her – What do you mean?
You – Well, it’s a compliment. I am just saying you’re cute.

This sort of statement is also highly effective for utilizing the


power of a mixed message. She’ll be wondering about what you
mean, of course, but in a different way than just mentioning how
she makes you feel.

She’ll create a mental list of all of the things that she’s done in
your presence, and as she searches for answers, she’ll begin
wondering about exactly how much you know about her.

She’ll have the feeling that you’re interested in her behavior on a


level that she didn’t anticipate, but at the same time, she’ll also
be a little bit more self-conscious as well.

The compliment, following her reply, is a good way to gracefully


seal the deal. The compliment keeps your method as a playful
tactic and not just a backhanded compliment.

Your judgment of her character will be flavored with a kind of


sweetness that may frustrate her as much as it flatters her;
either way, it will appeal to her emotional engagement and keep

24
you juggled high in the air on her list of things to figure out.

Rather than over-compliment a girl, which she’s probably


already got an agonizing level of experience with, it’s best to
pepper your compliments among playful statements that keep
her humble and guessing at the same time.

You – Look! I like you and all but you seem a little too difficult
for me to handle.
Her – I am difficult for you?
You – Yeah! My maa told me to avoid mean girls. Please be nice.

This is a tricky kind of maneuver to pull off, but it will depend


heavily on the kind of impression that you’ve already made on
her in the time leading up to the comment.

This kind of comment leaves you looking extremely vulnerable,


which can be a double-edged sword; some women may see it as
an endearing level of honesty, but others may take it literally
and interpret it as you being a bit of a wuss; you’ve got to make
sure that you’ve gotten her strongly invested into you before
attempting this kind of misdirection.

On the other hand, expressing your affection for her in this


dismissive kind of way is an example of being assertive and
direct without being overly gushy.

You’re balancing out your raw display of affection for her with
an equal dosage of suspended uncertainty, a lack of full
commitment that will send her off wondering about exactly
what would make you feel as though she’s not worth a complete
chase.

25
She may even try to save face and act a little bit more warmly to
you than she believed she was acting before!

You – I thought you were a nice girl, but lately I feel annoyed by
you.
Her – About what?
You – Well, I’ll let you know when the right moment comes, but
please don’t annoy me again. This behavior doesn’t suit a
wonderful girl like you.

In another move that potentially plays with extremes, you’ve got


to be careful with this sort of maneuver. While you’re definitely
off-setting the typical behavior of showering a girl with nothing
but praise, you’re also risking the chance of blowing her off
completely.

Not every girl will react pleasantly to being treated like an


annoyance for no apparent reason, so go forth with some level
of caution.

If you do manage to make it work effectively for you, you’ll have


managed to almost totally break down her defenses and inject
some serious drama into the equation.

A lot of women are used to having men who talk to them


practically worship the ground they walk on, and with a
comment like this, all of that expectation comes completely
crashing down.

They may be taken completely off-balance and be unsure of how


to respond to you seeming like you’re more annoyed by them

26
than attracted to them.

You’ll have instilled a feeling in them that makes them wonder if


things between the two of you are completely over, which might
cause them to think they’ve got to work at salvaging things
before it’s too late. The potential reactions to this are wildly
variable, so be confident in the probability before attempting it.

You – Girls like you are deceptive. I mean you look all shy and
innocent on the outside but I know there is a little devil hiding
inside you. That scares me a little.
Her – So I scare you?
You – Yeah you do a little bit, however, you’re also the cutest
little thing I’ve seen since sliced bread.

This approach is a good technique if you feel like completely


flipping her expectations upside down. You’ve got a bit of a
teasing element in here that might play at her sensual side,
complimented by a minor level of doubt that will keep it from
seeming like an expression of total desire.

You’ll be complimenting her in ways that she’s likely to


appreciate, but at the same time, you’ll be introducing elements
of uncertainty that might force her to question whether or not
she’s doing something wrong.

Your comment that she ‘scares’ you could be interpreted as


equal parts humorous and genuine, so she may be struggling to
figure out exactly which feeling it is that you’re trying to convey
about her.

She may feel like you’ve sacrificed a little bit of power over to

27
her by admitting she intimidating you, but at the same time,
you’re not going to seem like you lack confidence thanks to the
very direct compliment placed at the end.

This an excellent way to introduce a little bit of everything that


you want to aim for in the big mind game; provocativeness,
playfulness, doubt, criticism, and mild appreciation too.

28

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