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“It is what a man thinks of himself that really
determines his fate.” - Henry David Thoreau
1

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 TABLE OF CONTENT
TABLE OF CONTENT.........................................................................................................................................3
WARNING ..............................................................................................................................................................7
CONVENTION USED IN THIS BOOK ...........................................................................................................7
ABOUT THE AUTHOR .......................................................................................................................................7
INTRODUCTION..................................................................................................................................................8
Love .....................................................................................................................................................................8
How Human Behavior Affects Love .......................................................................................................8
Time To Bust Some Myths .........................................................................................................................9
Where Should You Begin? .......................................................................................................................11
Sync (Also Called Synchronization) Level....................................................................................12
Partner IdentiVication ...........................................................................................................................13
Knowing Your Partner Can Make You A Better Person...............................................................14
Quick Overview............................................................................................................................................16
CHAPTER 1: PHASE 1 - CATCHING THE ATTENTION .....................................................................17
The First Approach ....................................................................................................................................17
Using chat as your Virst approach ........................................................................................................18
The case for negative attention ........................................................................................................18
Don't go off the mark ............................................................................................................................18
Make friends with her friends. .........................................................................................................19
Boring Vs. New.........................................................................................................................................19
Catching Attention ......................................................................................................................................21
CHAPTER 2: STAYING NEW, UNIQUE, EXCITING AND MYSTERIOUS AT ALL TIMES ........23
Technique #1: Surprise ............................................................................................................................23
Technique #2: Present Yourself As Unique......................................................................................24
Technique #3: Stick Out In Your Appearance .................................................................................25
Technique #4: Getting His/Her Friends On Your Side ................................................................25
Technique #5: Brush Up Your Skills....................................................................................................26
Technique #6: Cold Reading ..................................................................................................................26
Technique #7: Stop The Repetition.....................................................................................................27
Technique #8: Change ..............................................................................................................................27
CHAPTER 3: BODY LANGUAGE IS YOUR NEW BEST FRIEND ......................................................28
Important tips that you should keep in mind .................................................................................29
Body Part #1: Legs .....................................................................................................................................30

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 1. The Foot Direction. ..................................................................................................................30
2. Legs at shoulder width ..........................................................................................................31
3. The attention or no opinion position ..............................................................................31
4. Ankle cross .................................................................................................................................32
5. Crossing legs ..............................................................................................................................32
6. Figure four (also called American Vigure four) ...........................................................33
7. European Cross .........................................................................................................................33
8. The Legs Parallel ......................................................................................................................34
Body Part #2: Arms ....................................................................................................................................34
1. Handshake ..................................................................................................................................34
2. Double Handshake ..................................................................................................................35
3. Elbow Touch ................................................................................................................................36
4. Crossed Arms ..............................................................................................................................37
5. Double Arms Grip......................................................................................................................37
6. Partial Arms Cross ....................................................................................................................38
Arms Touch....................................................................................................................................................38
1. Hand Clench.................................................................................................................................39
2. Hands Rub ....................................................................................................................................39
3. Face Platter ..................................................................................................................................39
4. Hands Behind The Back..........................................................................................................40
5. Handgrip Wrist ...........................................................................................................................40
6. Steeple ............................................................................................................................................40
7. Handbag Barrier ........................................................................................................................41
Body Part #3: Eyes .....................................................................................................................................42
Dilation and Contraction of Pupils ..................................................................................................43
Looking Up - The Most Commonly Used and Discussed Eye Position .............................44
What causes the attraction for men? .............................................................................................45
What Causes the Attraction for Women? .....................................................................................45
Short Quiz To Test Your Non-Verbal Communication Skills .....................................................46
CHAPTER 4: PHASE 2 - SYNCS CAN FIND YOU THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE..............................50
The Classmate Theory ..............................................................................................................................50
Technique #1: Matching Partner Preference..............................................................................52
Technique #2: We Are The Same .....................................................................................................55
Technique #3: Plan It ............................................................................................................................56
Technique #4: I Complete You ...............................................................................................................57

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 Technique #5: I Am Different ................................................................................................................58
Matching The Body Language ...............................................................................................................59
Example #1: Posture .............................................................................................................................59
Example #2: Talking ..............................................................................................................................59
Example #3: Intellectual Matching .................................................................................................60
Cover It Up with Words ............................................................................................................................61
CHAPTER 5: PHASE 3 - AROUSING HER ADDICTION TO YOU.....................................................63
Technique #1: Push-and-Pull ................................................................................................................63
• Mental Push-And-Pull .............................................................................................................64
• Physical Push-And-Pull ...........................................................................................................65
Technique #2: Shifting Gears .................................................................................................................66
Technique #3: Apply The Rule of Demand And Supply ..............................................................67
Technique #4: Anchoring ........................................................................................................................67
Technique #5: Take Care of Her Securities/Insecurities ...........................................................68
Technique #6: Give Her What Others Won't ...................................................................................69
Technique #7: Dealing with Differences In Partner Preferences ...........................................70
Technique #8: Idea SpeciVicity ..............................................................................................................71
Technique #9: Obliterate All Fears ......................................................................................................71
Technique #10: Prove That You Are In Demand ...........................................................................71
Technique #11: Trust Her .......................................................................................................................72
CHAPTER 6: PHASE 4 - MAINTAINING RELATION ...........................................................................73
Cause #1: Boredom ....................................................................................................................................73
Cause #2: Running Out of Discussion Topics ..................................................................................75
Solutions to the Causes.............................................................................................................................76
Solution #1: Keep Up the Momentum ...........................................................................................76
Solution #2: Keep Something New for Every Day ....................................................................76
Solution #3: Don’t Open Yourself Up Completely .....................................................................77
Solution #4: Visit New Places ...........................................................................................................77
Solution #5: Trivializing Changes ...................................................................................................78
Solution #6: Use Reverse Psychology ............................................................................................80
Solution #7: Make Your Relationship Secret ..............................................................................82
CHAPTER 7: ADDITIONAL TECHNIQUES OF LOVE ..........................................................................84
Situation #1: Falling in Love with Very Beautiful People ..........................................................84
Situation #2: Background Vs. Elite Family .......................................................................................85

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 Situation #3: Falling in Love with A Person Who ObjectiVies Others and is Materialistic
86
The Thought Web........................................................................................................................................87
CHAPTER 8: SUSTAINING THE PASSION AFTER GETTING MARRIED .....................................88
"Making Love" In A Heavenly Manner. ...............................................................................................88
Before Sex ..................................................................................................................................................89
During Sex .................................................................................................................................................89
After Sex .....................................................................................................................................................90
CONCLUSION .....................................................................................................................................................91

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 WARNING
• If your ultimate goal is to marry someone or to restore love in your relationship,
then this book is your best option.

• Don’t use the psychological techniques in this book for evil intentions.

• The misuse of the information contained in this book is not my responsibility.

• The only goal of this book is to help innocent people who can’t express their love.

• With the information in this book, millions of people have married their dream
partner and live a happy, peaceful life.

• After reading this book thoroughly, mastering the techniques might take some
few tries.

CONVENTION USED IN THIS BOOK

I have used she or he (he/she) interchangeably in this book; the situation is applicable
to both gender regardless of which gender I use in the book.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Walter J Bower is an independent researcher in behaviour psychology. The contents in

the book are based on the results of hundreds of research papers, trusted books and
experience.

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 INTRODUCTION

Love
Most of us attribute love to a magical feeling that exceptional, jaw-dropping experiences.
We've not only appreciated the personal experience connected with love, but we've also
come to accept it. One side beneVit of love is that you start improving yourself due to the
feeling of this unusual sensation. However, when we analyze love critically, you will
discover that it is an interaction between neuropeptides, sex hormones, and
neurotransmitters. These neuropeptides include vasopressin, oxytocin, dopamine,
estrogen, and testosterone. Besides, a combination of partner preference, attachment,
and sexual drive creates the thirst for love. But you can induce love provided you can use
tried and tested psychological methods to stimulate hormonal secretions underneath
these feelings. These principles may seem complicated. But by the time you read this
book to the end, you will have a thorough understanding of them. This book is an
understanding of love through neuro-linguistic programming and ancient sciences.

This book encompasses the various phases of love in a simple language so that you
won't have a hard time understanding the technical terms and principles.

How Human Behavior Affects Love

As a complex being, our minds can reason beyond the inVinite. It's no wonder we are at
the top of the evolutionary ladder. We have achieved exceptional standards in various
aspects of human endeavor. While our brain works similarly, we think differently based
on our genetic drive. Hence, we are unique with differing likes and dislikes. Using this
analogy about 'love,' we can infer that love works differently for each person. Take a look
at your circle of friends. You will discover that each of them can’t like the same song,
movie, or food preference. Love works in the same way.

Our dreams, concepts, and priorities about love differ from one another.

Since there is no formula for the feeling we call love, the question is,

• How can we fall in love correctly?

• Can this book make you fall in love with your desired partner?

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The Virst step is for you to have a thorough understanding of the phrase, 'falling in love.'
keep in mind that when you fall in love, your falling in love might lead to marriage, and it
may not lead to marriage. Often, two people fall in love because they have a matching
preference and attractiveness with their partner. This attractiveness is usually the result
of repeated thinking. This book will increase the chances of your desired partner to fall
in love with you. This book will teach you simple, psychologically proven strategies of
how to make your desired partner think about you by increasing your attractiveness
and matching preference. Since we have different personalities, there are various ways
to approach each character. Hence, read this book entirely and understand the concepts
entirely before you start implementing the powerful techniques you will soon discover.

If applying one of these techniques doesn't work for you, don’t be afraid to combine it
with other techniques shared in this book.

More importantly, you must be patient to make someone fall in love with you - this is an
essential requirement.

Time To Bust Some Myths

The internet and hitherto, people's head is Villed with lots of false information which
prevents your path to achieving your desired objective. Hence, you must eliminate them
right from the beginning. Now, let's disprove each of these myths one after the other.

Myth #1: False Information On the Internet

Majority of the information on the internet lack proof because anyone from anywhere
can post any kind of data on the internet. Mostly, it's a no man's land. Since these pieces
of information about body language and love can be misleading, implementing such
instruction can ruin the one chance you might have to get your desired partner.
Unfortunately, no one but you will be held responsible. If you believe such non-authentic
and anonymous advice, then, you would be unwise.

95% of internet content about love can be categorized into two:

• False information from fake experts to mislead you

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 • Psychological theories based on in-depth research

Since the Virst category of information lacks origin or provable source, it lacks
effectiveness. However, the second one is not yet proven; they are still possibilities.
These theories will only become facts when people have tested them and have been
shown to be effective. No one will fall in love with you through postulates or unproven
theories, no matter the newness of the research. Even when the information from the
internet has proof, it can’t be applicable to everyone since we are all unique beings, as
earlier mentioned. While general information from the internet may have helped you
with your college seminars or thesis, it won't help you here. With this book, you will
identify your unique traits and the strategy you need to deploy. While a method or
theory can be reasonable when you think about it, only the ones you can implement
effectively is genuine. Others are exclusively developed to such proVits from those who
don’t know any better.

Myth #2: False Information In Your Head

I am sure your mind is Villed with some of this incorrect information. But one way to get
the best out of this book is to purge your mind from previous information, most of
which are false assumptions and pre-judgments.

But don’t blame yourself for these misjudgments, it is the people you meet daily and the
society that has conditioned you to think that way.

The good news is, you make the right changes and

• Make your dream beautiful girl fall in love with you

• Become a desired partner to that handsome and hugely popular guy in your
college.

• Make your relationship with that girl/guy work out successfully despite been
raised from different Vinancial backgrounds

• Make your relationship with that girl/guy work out successfully despite
completely different personalities

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 • Afford the Vinancial commitments in a relationship even when you have to spend
to surprise or impress her

• Win her to yourself despite competing with other guys with better grades, looks
or money

• Have a chance to woo her even when she is close to someone less and is close to
falling love with that guy.

However, the Virst step is to believe that it is possible, even though you might have been
taught or programmed to think that none of these situations can become a reality. Again,
purge your mind of these misconceptions before reading this book. Do it now! Always
remind yourself of Muhammed Ali's golden words, "what my mind can conceive, and my
heart can believe, I can achieve." it's not only the mindset of champions, it is applicable
and useful in all areas of life, including your love life. Hence, I believe that it is possible,
and it will. Also, don’t judge yourself based on your friend's reality. He may not have
gotten the girl/guy of his/her dreams; it doesn't mean that you won't. If you believe you
will. When you implement what you will learn in this book, you will be on another level
that you won't need to compare yourself with another person.

Where Should You Begin?

There are some basic principles you need to understand before you start learning about
techniques or brain map about love.

I strongly recommend that you read and understand the basics thoroughly. They will
form the basis of your understanding of upcoming chapters.

If you are confused about where to get started, here are two points that will get you
started:

• Sync (also called synchronization) level

• Partner identiVication

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Sync (Also Called Synchronization) Level
Consciously or subconsciously, most people, including you, are searching for their ideal
partner even when you don’t reveal it in public. I included you because if you are not
searching for your perfect partner, then you won't be reading this book. Recall that the
combination of partner preference, attachment, and sexual drive are the prerequisites
for falling in love with someone else. Partner preference simply means a set of criteria
you expect from your ideal partner. You want a partner who matches your subconscious
desires, what you lack, and who can meet your wants. If you can induce the right
feelings, you can win over someone who is against love or who is indifferent about the
concept of love. The set of criteria in partner preference is the key that unlocks the
mind. It consists of ideas or wishes about your partner. Matching partner preference
creates a synchronized feeling that he/she is the one that's the ideal partner for you.

If someone you chose meets all your partner preference criteria and proves his/her
worth, then this is known as perfect sync. There is also hyper sync in which you are
perfect than your chosen partner preference. Lastly, there's also hypo sync where you
are you don’t meet your potential partner's set of criteria.

Apart from these three sync terms (which forms the basis of all techniques you will
learn later in this book), you should also keep in mind two other important aspects of
the sync levels.

• Preferences have unequal weights

• Sync levels can shift

Let's delve into each of these in brief:

Preferences Have Unequal Weights

Assuming a girl prefers a partner who doesn't consume alcohol and who is a
government employee. If she seems ideal for you, you can change her mind about both
criteria. You must give her proof that you tried lots of times to be a government
employee, you don’t indulge in drugs, and you have good behavior. Then, she might give
you a chance, and from there, you can make moves to take the relationship to the next

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level. Though it won't be enough to build a healthy relation, you can turn around a
potential partner's partner preference to suit you.

Sync levels can shift

More importantly, partner preferences can be shifted or transformed since they don’t
have equal importance. While it is an excellent strategy to change between sync levels,
you must never change to the hypo sync level. You must strive to be between the hyper
sync and perfect sync levels. Balance is essential here; you must stick to the hyper sync
levels for a long time. Otherwise, your potential partner may get the impression that
you're out of his/her league.

This is similar to the popular push-and-pull technique, which we will discuss in the later
chapters.

Partner IdentiTication
While it seems natural to get anyone, you can't want everyone because you can’t
guarantee the person's personality and behavior. You will save a lot of time when you
can be conscious and aware of your choices. You must be absolutely sure of the person
you want as your partner. Also, don’t make it difVicult for someone to fall in love with you
through your attitude or mindset.

Here are some common beliefs that you need to eliminate:

• 'For the fun of it, I will implement these strategies just to make her fall in love
with me.'

• 'I wish she could be the one to fall in love with me.'

• 'I wish she could be mine.'

These are attitudes of someone who lacks conVidence. You must believe that you will get
what you want. Yes, it is not a wish; it is a want. They are two different things. A dream is
a desire, while a lack is a need. Hence, you need to be serious about it because it takes
time to understand and implement these strategies.

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Knowing Your Partner Can Make You A Better Person.
While you are conVident that it will happen soon, he/she isn't your partner yet. But you
can take an early step by researching your partner to have a better knowledge of him/
her. Don’t assume that there is nothing to learn about him/her because you've known
him for some years. The base technique is to know your partner, even the smallest
details about their partner preference. When they are not open about their choices, Vind
the means to uncover the information. Even when they disclose such information to you,
it won't be a bad idea to authenticate the data. For instance, assuming you are a tall guy
and you have a short girl as a friend. However, she prefers a guy shorter than you even
though you want her and are in love with her. Since you are a friend she won't want to
offend, she might disclose to you her height preference of men that she desires. This
shouldn't surprise you as almost all interpersonal conversations have these sorts of
barriers.

But by paying attention to her opinion or complements about others, you can afVirm or
disprove her facts. Where possible, ask her other friends or relatives. If you aren’t in
direct contact with her, your best alternative is to get close to one of her friends who is
willing to assist you.

However, choose her friends wisely. Don’t choose a friend who:

• is in a relationship already

• is egoistic

• just got dumped by her partner. This friend would still be suffering from the pain
of lost love and might disgrace you in the presence of your potential partner.

While partner preference is essential, personality is more important. Life events and
subconscious thoughts usually mold partner preferences.

Thus, you must know the right technique to apply. At a point in your journey of
discovery, you may be hooked. But a seemingly unimportant detail might get you off the
hook. You can obtain this information directly from her, her friends, relatives, or even
social media platforms.

The pages they like and the kind of posts they share will reveal unspoken details about
him/her and his/her personality.

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However, you must seek the right information that can help you at any phase of your
love journey.

Below are some traits that can reveal a lot of information about his/her personality:

1. Single Child or A Child With One Sibling

A child with one sibling will have a different mindset from an only child who is usually
possessive. Also, if your potential partner is the older of two, he/she would have lacked
attention when the second child was born. Hence, giving notice is an easy way to attract
a Virst-born child. Childhood experiences frame every adult's mindset. So, Vind out more
about his childhood.

2. Movies and Songs

Suggest various movie titles. Then, if you Vind a match with him/her, you have created a
sense of sync. Alternatively, you can Vind out about her favorite artist's songs, listen to
them, and give her your opinion about it or ask her why she listens to that artist's songs.

3. Openness, ConTidence, Shyness or Closed

A shy lady will always admire and prefer conVident guys. Hence, while exuding
conVidence, you can impress her easily. Conversely, you might need to display higher
levels of conVidence to an already conVident lady.

4. Deepest Fears and Happiest Moments

You must recognize and protect her from her deepest fears and never bring up topics
that she hates. When you are together, always assure her that none of her worries will
ever come to pass. Research and recreate her happiest moments frequently. For
example, if she's still depressed because her father is a drug addict, tell her how much
you hate drugs and drug abuse.

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 5. Her Favorites

A simple and effective way to celebrate her on her birthday is to buy her an item she
loves (for example, a box of chocolate). If you prepare for it, you can give her favorite
gifts, even when you're on a budget. These simple acts give her the impression that
you're paying attention to even the smallest details about things she likes.

With these traits and the corresponding examples, you now understand the kind of
information you should seek when trying to determine whether you are a partner
preference for a potential partner.

Keep in mind that all information is relevant. Remember that little drops of water make
an ocean.

Quick Overview
• Love is the sum of partner preference, attachment, and sexual drive rolled into
one.

• Since human beings are unique, you need a novel technique to approach each
person. In later chapters, you will discover the method that suits each
personality traits

• 95% of information about falling in love on the internet is false

• Purge your mind of previous details you already have about falling in love. It will
help you to avoid harboring several misconceptions about this beautiful feeling.

• The best way to attract your ideal partner is to be in perfect sync with him/her -
matching all her partner preferences. If you are more matched, it is called hyper
sync; if it less, it is hypo sync.

• Develop a good knowledge of your potential partner. You need time and
dedication before you can make anyone fall in love with you.

• No information about your partner is unimportant

• Believe that everything is possible, and your dream girl/guy can become real.

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Bear in mind that regardless of your kind-heartedness or good looks, people's partner
preferences vary. However, you can show your good behavioral qualities to your
potential partner in an attractive manner.

The whole process is divided into four phases:

• Catching attention

• Creating sync

• Making him/her addicted

• Maintaining relation

You will learn more about each of these phases in successive upcoming chapters.

CHAPTER 1: PHASE 1 - CATCHING THE

ATTENTION
The First Approach
Since the Virst impression creates a lasting impression in the memory, it is crucial to
impress your potential partner during your Virst interaction. At the very least, you want
her to remember your name. If she thinks about you after your Virst interaction to call
you, then you have made a great impression. One way to make a lasting impression is to
interact with her on a day she's less busy. Also, you should always meet in a positive
atmosphere in a favorable situation. Hence, each time she relives your meeting, she
relives a pleasant experience. Before, during, and after your conversation, always put up
a warm smiling face.

Before your Virst meet, pay attention to your dress sense. Wear proper clothes with a
good color combination. Then, during your interaction, pay attention to your posture,
and the speed at which you talk. Create sync at the subconscious level by listening to her
attentively and matching her speech's speed on the few occasion when you speak.

The message is not relevant here. An offset or normal topic might bore or startle her.

If she's with a group of people, your best option is to apply the pick-up artist technique.

This technique involves having a friend with you.

Here's what you should do:

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 • Apart from the one you want, look into the eyes of everyone for the Virst three
minutes. Here, having a psychological effect on her thoughts is critical.

• These three minutes of neglect will make her start wondering why you are not
looking at her.

• After the three minutes are up, look into her eyes or the top of her ears (to her,
it's the same as looking into her eyes.)

• Isolate her from the group for a short warm-up talk while your friend starts
engaging the group.

Using chat as your Tirst approach

Since the person can’t create a visual image about you, then I strongly suggest that you
avoid using chat as your Virst approach. Also, this approach won't give her anything
memorable to retain about you. However, you can use the chatting method after the Virst
one or two meetings. Hopefully, we will devote another book to chatting techniques as
they are outside the scope of this book.

The case for negative attention

As previously mentioned, the Virst-born child usually lacks attention after the birth of
the second child. When such people do anything for the attention, their childhood
experience is the cause of their action - it's not an innate ability. Using the same analysis,
don’t go out of your way to attract the attention of your potential partner. She will think
you are out of your mind and won't want to be associated with you at all. This book will
show you more effective ways to get his/her attention.

Don't go off the mark

When things start going Vine, it doesn't give you the liberty to speak more or worse still,
propose. You need to be patient and not lose control. Again, during the Virst few dates,
speak less and for a short time. This will create an aura of mystery about you.
Remember that everyone usually wants a sneak peek of a top-secret book but aren't
interested in an open book.

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Make friends with her friends.
Thus, when you have issues along the line (which is bound to happen), your familiar
friend(s) will be of great help. This familiar friend(s) must be interested in improving
your relationship. If one of her friends is in a good relationship, you can become friends
with her lover. Thus, he can provide you with help towards achieving a fruitful
relationship as well.

Also, he can lay an excellent foundation for that Virst interaction by giving you a good rep
to your potential partner. However, this outstanding 'rep' shouldn't come off as a boast;
it should be natural.

Here's a simple and effective way to make the rep seem natural.

Your prospective partner: The guy in that TV show has a great sense of humor. He makes
the show great.

Your familiar friend: I agree! It's always fun to be around humorous people

Your prospective partner: Yeah, sure!

Your familiar friend: They always Bind the positive side of things to give us some comic
relief. It's still boring being with the serious guys. Guess what? I met a new friend a few
weeks ago, and he's damn hilarious. His name is (YOU). When I want to have a good laugh,
I talk to him.

This is an example of an effective pre-introduction for you by her friend. This familiar
friend can also provide you with details about her personal tastes, feelings, and partner
preferences. She is laying the groundwork for you not to run into trouble when relating
with her friend. This familiar friend can even dissuade another potential suitor from her
by creating a wrong impression of this new suitor.

Boring Vs. New

The news is not called that name just for the fun of it. It's called the news because we all
want something fresh and exciting. Hence, old/boring can never stand new and exciting.
The technique here is an extension of the 'creating an aura mystery about you' concept,
which we earlier mentioned. A Microsoft Study has shown that eight seconds is now the

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attention span of the average human being. Unfortunately, TV and social media are
partly responsible for this worrying trend. Changing TV channels frequently and
scrolling through Facebook posts endlessly can contribute to short attention spans.
Most of us struggle to focus on a thought or an object for a long time. Globalization has
made everything available almost at an instant. Hence, it is no wonder that people only
pay enough attention to new concepts, new faces, and new things.

Now, people's interaction is being affected by this attitude and approach. Some
relationships and even marriages break up because the two parties involved are so used
to each other that there is nothing new to anticipate or explore. While this is a nadir
point for the human race, it is happening, and if not checked, it will keep rising
unabatedly. Thus, a woman might break up with you and start a relationship with
someone else (who might even have fewer attributes than you) just to explore a new
experience. However, don’t blame yourself, we live in modern times, and these are some
of its side effects. Another proof of short attention span in humans is that most people
now struggle to read printed books. Rather than dwell on the gloom, it is best to Vind a
solution to the problems, which is what you are discovering and will discover in this
book. An example of a solution is the replacement of long-form blogs with tweets.

Since you will need to be at your best when you are with your partner, then you need to
lengthen your attention span.

Here are six research-proof ways to increase your attention span:

• Stop multitasking: Multitasking decrease brain performance

• Exercise: A single exercise session can improve cognitive control measurably.

• Meditate: In a nutshell, meditation involves focusing on your breath and

returning your attention to your breathing when your mind wanders

• Spend time with mother nature: It will recharge those muscles you've
exhausted during exercise and meditation. A good night's sleep is one way to
spend time with mother nature.

• Remove interference: In simple terms, your environment should be as boring as

possible.

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However, you can’t increase your potential partner's attention span, at least, not yet. The
best alternative is for you not too dull; she should always be interested in you for one
reason or the other.

Let her explore gradually, similar to having an adventure from the Virst day.

Catching Attention
In the last module, you discovered the result of being open, boring, or both. Thus, the
question is, how can you catch attention by applying new and unique concepts? For
example, you can’t catch the attention of a lady with many suitors without being
different from them. Right from the onset, you have to be different. When meeting her
for the Virst time, don’t use famous pick-up lines that are readily available everywhere. It
is highly likely that most of her other suitors have used the same lines. If you do, she will
forget you instantly because the short-term memory of the human brain usually stores a
similar pattern.

Your compliments should be different from that of the other guys who would often
compliment her based on her physical attributes.

Some unique complements you can use are:

• You have a positive charisma

• There is something about you. *Have a follow-up line for this complement. She
might demand to know what it is about her.

There are multiple beneVits to using any of the above compliments. You should look to
complement the subtle things during your Virst meet rather than her body.
Complimenting those subtle things gives the impression that you pay attention to
details; this is also an advantage because girls like guys who can identify and turn small
details into great complements. Also, you will come off as a mature person who can take
care of her and her needs. Then, after appreciating those subtle details, you can now
complement her body. Only a few guys will appreciate her brain; most will compliment
her body. Suppose you say that she is smart; she will remember you for a long time
because you've given her a value most guys fail to mention. It will affect her
psychologically in a positive sense. So, bear this in mind during your Virst talk; it will

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catch her attention. Even if your interaction is short, it should consist of at least one
unique and thoughtful compliment. You will seem like a philosopher to her.

Though you should inventive and new with your remarks, you should never be
awkward. You must choose your words carefully.

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 CHAPTER 2: STAYING NEW, UNIQUE, EXCITING
AND MYSTERIOUS AT ALL TIMES

From falling in love to each day in a relationship, your partner should have a roller
coaster experience throughout the whole process. There are techniques for making each
day of your love affair unique and exciting. You will discover these techniques in this
section. Hence, I strongly suggest that you print or re-read this chapter regularly.

Technique #1: Surprise

For some ladies, buying them expensive gifts is hardly a surprise to them. It has become
the norm for them, and it's now boring to them. Imagine listening to the same song
every day, eating ramen noodles every day, even performing precisely the same routine
every day; you won't be looking forward to each day.

However, you can use the surprise technique to step out of this boring pattern. Here are
some proven surprise techniques:

1. Be the present

Show up and wait for her where she least expects. It could be anywhere - ofVice,
classroom, or her favorite place of shopping. Note that if you are not yet in a
relationship, you must make your presence seem like a natural occurrence rather than a
plan. It creates the idea that both of you think alike, which is the reason why both of you
turn up at the same place. Then, when you meet, make a 'casual remark.' You could say,
"Wow, what a coincidence, I never expected to see you here!" By contrast, if both of you
are already in a relationship, then, inform her about the plan; she will appreciate your
effort.

2. Inexpensive gifts can also be a surprise

This is where good old-fashioned research becomes highly essential. When you know
what she loves and buys it for her, she will appreciate the gift regardless of its price.
Suppose you buy her an expensive dress and a puppy. She will prefer the puppy to a
dress. Over time, the dress will no longer be useful. It will become a rag once it has
outlived its usefulness (it can either be out of a size or no longer fashionable). But as she
plays with a puppy, it triggers positive emotions and thoughts.

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Pro tip: the best gifts are those which can be part of her daily routine.

3. Artwork

Where possible, ensure that you are the one who created the artwork. In a later chapter,
you will discover various skills, hobbies, and professions women like in men and vice-
versa. The artwork doesn't have to be a picture; it can also be a poem. I suggest you start
learning some art; it will be useful at some point in your relationship.

Whether it's an artwork or poetry, she will appreciate you for the valuable gift and for
being an artist.

4. Messages

Apart from the morning kisses, which should be the norm, you can make your
relationship more exciting by sending her lovely messages.

Though chatting techniques deserve a full book on its own, here are a few sample texts
you can post:

• "My thoughts are free to go anywhere, but it's surprising that they often head in
your direction."

• "With your love, I have endless blessings and inexhaustible blessings. Your love
has Villed my heart with many amazing and wonderful thoughts. You are the
best."

• "Mere imagining sharing every day of my life with you gives me an indescribable
joy!"

• "As you have changed me for the better because you are in my life, may your
charm never fail."

You can send her these surprise texts or search for additional ones online. While the
surprise technique works like a charm during your relationship, it will also work after
you're married. So, don’t stop using it after marriage.

Technique #2: Present Yourself As Unique

However, ensure that your actions and words are a match to avoid destroying the
relationship before it even started. Show off your uniqueness and energy by sharing

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positive thoughts. One simple and effective way to do this is to gather positive thoughts
from books and websites such as BrainyQuote. Since these quotes reVlect your thoughts,
you will come off as unique and attractive. You will be different from most people who
give off negative vibes because their minds are Villed with negative thoughts at all times.
Here's a quote you can use, "I don’t like to judge people. Those who wish to smoke can
do so. But personally, I don’t smoke because I am more concerned about my health." this
statement gives the notion that you respect other people's freedom and their decision
without bias. Also, it shows that you're mindful of your health. Again, remember that
every aspect of your life should match as you present yourself to her.

If you have a fat belly, are constantly plagued with diseases, and rebuke others at any
point in time, you would have destroyed the 'mindful health and non-judgmental' image
you're trying to build. In simple terms, practice what you preach.

Technique #3: Stick Out In Your Appearance

But it doesn't mean that you have to color your hair green or orange. However, pay
proper attention to your appearance. A careless appearance gives off a negative
impression. For example, a scruffy beard and an uncombed hair. It gives off the
impression that you can’t take care of yourself much less than another person. No one
would like to associate himself or herself with a careless person. So, dress decently and
courteously.

Technique #4: Getting His/Her Friends On Your Side

His/her friends have a big role to play your love story. You will need them to create that
aura of mystery for you in her presence. They should always Vind the means to include
you in their conversation. We've discussed how you can do this in the previous chapter.
When her friends compliment you in her presence, she's subconsciously accepting you
to have a relationship with you.

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Technique #5: Brush Up Your Skills
Appear more qualiVied and attractive over other suitors by brushing up your old skills.
Palmistry and magic are two useful skills you can learn and which can improve your
worth in the eyes of your potential partner. You can use any of them to start a
conversation or continue a conversation. You can say, "quick one, let me show you a
trick." she would be curious to know the secret behind this technique, and you can
reveal it to her but only after making her wait for it. Make her feel special by telling her
that you have never revealed this secret to anyone. Also, encourage and guide her to
perform the trick to her group of friends or any group of a crowd where they permit it.
Apart from having a joyous experience (especially the looks on her friends' face) and
feeling special, you also have more time to interact with each other. Hence, she will want
to learn more tricks, but don’t reveal them to her. (more about that later). The secrets
and the mystery of magic make it exciting to people.

It's the same factors that solidify relationships. One of the questions she would most
likely ask is, "how and where did you learn these tricks?" your response can be, "I can’t
reveal that to you. Sorry! I met the person who introduced me to a secret order during
one of my workouts a long time ago, and I promised never to reveal his true identity. It's
only fair that I keep to my promise, right?" thus, you are creating a mystery but also
revealing some mystery gradually. Interesting stuff, right?

Technique #6: Cold Reading

Cold reading consists of various techniques that convince someone that the "reader" is
communicating with the spirit-world to know about him/her. It's usually used by
tricksters, psychics, and magicians. By learning a few simple tricks and asking the right
questions, you can master the art of cold reading. If you can add commitment,
conVidence, and modesty to your performance, you can really convince her that you have
some supernatural reading abilities. Simple graphology and palmistry are classiVied as
cold reading techniques. Graphology is the evaluation of personality characteristics and
patterns of handwriting to identify the writer. Graphologists claim that they can indicate
the psychological state of the writer when she was writing.

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Technique #7: Stop The Repetition
While most people repeat the same words or messages to prove a point or convince,
repetition can be disturbing and affect your relationship negatively.

Rather than using the same words to convey your idea, use another mode of
communication or better words. Most ladies regard guys who repeat the same words as
a proud or boring person.

Alternatively, convince his/her friend to reiterate your idea to him/her; it will make
your idea more convincing. Also, don’t show off your skills repeatedly, it will lose its
value in her eyes, and you will lose your worth to her.

Technique #8: Change

While you can always change what's around you, don’t change yourself. Changing what's
around you doesn't mean throwing away your old home appliances. In this context, it
means keeping excited about each aspect of your relationship every day. A side beneVit is
that these changes will also keep you ecstatic and driven. Also, you don’t have a spend a
fortune to make these changes. For example, instead of replacing your tables and chairs,
you can re-arrange them to give your home/room a fresh look. It counts! Keep things
fresh and new by changing things around you always.

You will discover more psychological factors that affect love later, but let's discuss the
role and essence of body language in having a successful relationship.

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CHAPTER 3: BODY LANGUAGE IS YOUR NEW BEST
FRIEND
From henceforth, make body language, your best friend. It will help you through difVicult
situations, encode, decode messages, thoughts, and emotions like a professional. Body
language can be deVined as the communication of attitudes and feelings through
conscious or unconscious movements and postures.

When you are about to read body language, consider these two signiVicant factors:

• Context reading

• Congruence

• Context Reading

Always body language based on the current situation. For example, scratching the head
might mean confusion, deep thoughts, or dandruff. Hence, the context will determine
the appropriate meaning for it at that moment.

If the person is undergoing a quiz, then the head-scratching can be deep thoughts. If you
observe fallen hair on the person's shoulders, then, dandruff is the closest meaning to
the head-scratching.

• Congruence

Congruence is the degree to which the body language cues in a person have similar
matches based on the meaning derived from them. Still using the head-scratching
example. If, in addition to scratching his head, the person is looking in various
directions, then he is probably confused. Conversely, if his eyes are focused on an object
or someone, then he is thinking. Thus, you can only make conclusions after reading the
signs and conVirming the signs via congruence. Another example, a child is saying he
didn't steal a cookie while putting his hands in his pocket (a dishonest gesture) is an
incongruent cue. The body language and verbal language are not a match. Reading body
language is an innate skill with women; it is a skill that differentiates them from men. If
you are a man, then you must develop and polish that skill. For men who can’t read

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signals, their love stories end before it even starts. Most ladies use their body language
to express their affections for men.

But men who can’t read such expressions give no response. Hence, the lady assumes
that the guy is not interested, and the love story is tossed right into the trash.

Important tips that you should keep in mind

• Most people rarely pay attention to other parts of their bodies apart from their
heads. Hence, always interpret other parts of his/her body (especially the legs).

• Most women appreciate men who can express their emotions using body
language.

• Only shake hands when you've been given permission. Now, observe the
handshake. A bold woman who is open to new ideas will provide a Virm
handshake. Otherwise, the woman is shy and might not have an open mind.
When you observe this cue, take each part of the process slowly, or she would
withdraw from the relationship.

• If your potential partner smokes, then watch how she smokes. If he looks down
as he inhales and exhales the smoke, then his sad past is making him depressed.
If the reverse is the case, then he is smoking for the fun of it. His mind is whole;
you only need to worry about his lungs.

• Apart from having quick sexual arousal when in front of their dream women,
men's creative talent also increases in numerous folds.

• Jiggly legs are proof of fear. Hence, if you observe that the other person's legs are
jiggly and you want to discuss an urgent matter, discuss some off-topics that
make him/her relaxed before introducing the essential subjects.

In subsequent sections of this chapter, you will discover how to interpret cues from each
part of the body.

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Body Part #1: Legs
This is one body part where most people give the least attention. But from now on, you
should start paying proper attention to this part. However, as you observe the other
person's legs, make sure you control your leg positions.

Bear these tips in mind as you interpret leg positions:

• An expression of difVidence is to speak while shifting your body weight. If you

observe this cue in your potential partner, then it is proof he is not yet conVident
being around you. Your best action is to encourage and support him/her.

• The best way to read leg positions is to sit or stand at a distance where you can
have a complete view of the other person's legs. However, don’t ruin your chance
at the relationship by making it easy to observe that you are about to follow his/
her leg positions.

Below are some common leg positions and what they represent:

1. The Foot Direction.

This is the most important leg technique. Often, most people's feet aren't parallel. One is
always pointing in another direction while the other is usually in a neutral position. The
leg pointing towards you when the person faces you is known as the neutral leg because
it is in a neutral position. The other feet are pointing at a direction where your mind
desires next. If this other foot is pointing at you despite facing and talking to one of her
friends, then it is proof that she likes you and is happy to interact with you. You can
apply this technique to various situations. Assuming you are in front of the theater but
you unsure about whether or not to ask her to go and watch a movie with you. Then,
observe the direction of her foot. If one of her foot is pointing to the theater, then, she is

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willing to see a movie provided you ask. You should use the same hack to know her
decision when she is at your room door or home gate.

2. Legs at shoulder width

This position is a display of conVidence and authority. A person speaking with this leg
position is willing to stay with you as long as you wish. Those who stand and speak in
this position mean what they are saying.

3. The attention or no opinion position

When you are speaking to someone, and she is standing in this position, then, she is
making a careful observation about opinion. She is not interested in giving her opinion
about the subject matter.

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 4. Ankle cross

Ankle cross is a popular leg position while sitting. But it is mental lip biting and
connotes a negative emotion such as timidity, insecurity, anxiety, stress, discomfort, fear,
or uncertainty. It can also be a sign of self-restraint from disclosing a thought or an
emotion. If you are a lady and you are not experiencing any of these issues, then you
shouldn't sit in this position. As you sit, keep your legs Virm on the ground.

5. Crossing legs

This leg position indicates that she isn't willing to let you in. It also portrays a
submissive but defensive mindset and a short attention span. Even when the person
listens to you, they won't assimilate or recall what you've said or are saying. New
scientiVic evidence suggests that people who cross their legs and hands remember 60%
less information than those sitting in an open position. If you are in the early phases of
your relationship, then your potential partner may sit in this position.

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 6. Figure four (also called American Tigure four)

Men are fond of using this leg position. It is an indication of relaxation and authority.
Those who sit in this position won't give in to your opinion. Clearly, you shouldn't be
introducing new topics to him when in this sitting position. Make him relaxed by
introducing fun topics, and when you've observed a change in his sitting position, you
can introduce that new topic to you. However, most men won't make a decision when in
this position. If they do while with you, they are faking the decision perhaps to satisfy
you.

7. European Cross

This is another closed position usually deployed by celebrities and politicians. They do
this in an attempt to prevent themselves from disclosing several secrets in their head.
The combination of this leg position with a crossed arm is an indication that the
person's mind is no longer in the conversation.

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 8. The Legs Parallel

For anatomical reasons and to make their legs appear toned, the legs parallel is a sign of
womanliness. By pressing one leg against the other, the parallel legs posture makes the
woman's legs appear sexier and more youthful. This sitting position is usually used by
women to draw sexual attention to themselves. Women who have deep feelings for the
other person sit in this posture during a dialogue.

Body Part #2: Arms

You can deduce a person's thoughts using the cues from her arms and legs. You can also
use the arms for congruency. The arms of men and women differ functionally and
evolutionarily. Men's arms are inward rotating; thus, they can throw objects at a long
distance with high accuracy. Conversely, women's arms are outward rotating, which
improves their efViciency of carrying objects. The evolutionary adaptation and
functional difference that existed from ancient times when men were hunters and
women usually carry children is still in existence today.

Below are some common arm positions and what they represent:

1. Handshake

The handshake is one of the most critical aspects of arm positions. The use of
handshakes in a relationship is different from its use in the corporate world. During the

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early phases of a relationship, the handshake is a golden opportunity for you to touch
each other.

Men and women's brains react differently to a handshake:

• For men, a picture or memory can create sexual arousal or deep feeling

• For women, a touch (and not an image) will create similar emotions.

While you can touch her during a handshake, be mindful of the following:

• Get close to her to offer the handshake. If you are at a distance and she refuses
your handshake, then you will be in an awkward situation.

• Perform the handshake with perfectly vertical hands. Suppose you are shaking
hands with your right arm. If you tilt it towards the left during the handshake,
then it is a sign of dominance. If you tilt it to the right, it is a sign of a non-
disciplined personality but an open-minded attitude.

• Most women get a feeling of comfort from a warm handshake.

2. Double Handshake

While this is a gesture that creates a strong bond, it is rarely used. Both of you can say
your names as you shake hands, and if you could only mumble words during the
process, you can say, "shall we try that again?" during this 'second' handshake, place
your left hand around her arm. It arouses a comfortable feeling, which creates a memory
in her head because it is different from the usual handshake. It also makes you unique.
The double-hander is a mini-hug and is acceptable where a hug is also acceptable.

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Hence, don’t use it when meeting her for the Virst time, she might feel suspicious about
your intentions.

3. Elbow Touch

When there is a slight elbow touch, it has been proven that people speak more truth
than lies. This scientiVic proof was called the 'coin booth experiment.' you can get an
advantage over the other person with a skillful elbow touch. Most ladies regard some
parts of their body (such as their hands and Vingers) as public and some parts as private
(for example, their shoulders). Hence, they don’t mind people touching their hands or
Vingers. However, she wouldn't want anyone to touch her shoulder. Your best alternative
is to touch the part of her body that is between her private and public zone. Thus, you
can cause a deep feeling which she won't mind because she wouldn't know what to
think. The elbow is a perfect zone between her perceived public and private parts of her
body. With a skillful elbow touch, you can triple your chances of getting what you want.
However, ensure that this touch isn't more or less than three seconds. This short period
is the most ideal in registering your feelings in her mind.

Since it takes a short period, you can do it while giving her a handshake. Extend your left
arm to touch her elbow during the handshake. It would seem like you want to conVirm
her name. But it induces a deep emotional seal and a unique feeling in her mind. Again,
the touch must not exceed three seconds and must touch her at her elbow.

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 4. Crossed Arms

The crossed arms and the crossed legs position denote the same thing - a defensive, self-
protective, and closed-off person. When she sits in this position, she is telling you that
she's not ready to come out of her defensive shell, and she's not prepared to allow you
into her life. So, don’t bother introducing any serious topic for discussion, you will only
be wasting your time. You can introduce decoy topics until you observe changes in her
position.

5. Double Arms Grip

The double-arm grip involves a tight hold of the upper arms. Sometimes, the tight grip
can cut off blood circulation and turns the Vingers and knuckles to white. It depicts a
negative restrained attitude even more than the crossed arms. It is also a sign of
discomfort or fear. A person who is yet to be comfortable with you will take this
position. Hence, bring up interesting topics to reduce the unease.

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 6. Partial Arms Cross

When we were young, we hugged a lot and enjoyed the comfort of these hugs. When we
become adults, we long for these hugs. Thus, our brain attempts to recreate those
emotions with minor modiVications. Most women often perform the partial arm cross.
They leave one hand free but hold its elbow with the other arm. Women usually hold
their bags in the same way. This posture portrays stress and self-doubt.

Men that perform this posture will usually check their phones, pull off the cuff button,
play with their watch, or adjust their cuff-links.

Arms Touch
As you will soon discover, arms touch gestures are slightly different from arms gesture.
That's why I am discussing them in a separate section.

Mostly done by men, the arms touch is done by those who wish to maintain a strong
image or those at higher authority. Most male teachers are guilty of this posture,
especially when addressing a crowd of female students.

Pro tip: place your hands on the chair's handle. A sign of humility and self-doubt is to
drop your arms inside a chair.

Here are some arms touch gestures and their meanings that you should know:

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 1. Hand Clench

This gesture depicts a frustrating feeling. It is a negative gesture that shows that the
person wants to get out of your presence immediately. Hence, it is best not to make an
attempt to relax him or engage him.

2. Hands Rub

Rubbing the palm of the hands is a sign of positive expectations. Her anxiety and
expectation level determines the speed at which she rubs her palms together. A slow
hand rub is an indication of confusion or doubt.

3. Face Platter

This gesture's name is derived from the phrase "serving the face on a platter." most
women display a sign of love with this positive gesture. It involves resting the chin on
the hands' backside and propping it up.

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 4. Hands Behind The Back

Holding hands together at the back like a stand-at-ease position is a sign of comfort,
fearlessness, and superiority. Clearly, the person is telling you that he is superior to you.

5. Handgrip Wrist

This gesture indicates frustration and boredom. The height at which the one hand holds
the other from the wrist to the elbow determines the level of frustration.

Before engaging in a serious conversation with a person in this gesture, introduce a

topic that will amuse them.

6. Steeple

Used by most world leaders, the hand steeple involves touching the Vingertips of both
hands and arching the hands to create a church steeple. It indicates conVidence, but it's

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also a sign that the person has some hidden secrets. Hence, it is not a positive sign in
men or women.

7. Handbag Barrier

This gesture is also known as hugging a jacket, clutching a coat over the chest, hiding
behind objects, placing objects in front, or coffee cup barrier. Whether in a sitting or
standing position, the person holds a drink across his body similar to the way arms are
crossed. It is a litmus test for you to get a yes or no for each topic you suggest. First,
invite her over for a drink. During your conversation, observe where she places the cup
after each sip. If she takes the cup with her right hand and puts it on her right side, then,
she accedes and feels good with your opinion. But if she takes the cup with her right
hand but places it on the left side, then that's the mental cue that she doesn't agree with
you. Don’t ask her about it. The placing of the cup on the opposite side and the crossing
of arms and legs have the same cues. It is a subtle display of the body's correlation with
the brain. Most people don’t read any meaning to these actions. Hence, it is easy to read
and interpret it accurately.

Here's how to ensure that you are interpreting the cues correctly:

• Ensure that her decision is not inVluenced by external factors. If she has placed
her mobile phone or bag on the left side of the table, then she can only set the
cup on the right side even if she intends to place it anywhere else.

• Ask her for her choice of drink. Don’t choose for her. If she doesn't like the drink,
she might place the cup in the cross direction.

• If she isn't open to you yet, she might place the cup in the cross direction.

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 • Ensure that the environmental conditions are favorable for her. She might place
the cup in the cross direction because she doesn't like the group of people sitting
around the table with you.

Body Part #3: Eyes

The famous adage that the eyes are the windows of the mind is almost true. The eyes
form a crucial part of the body's physiology and the interpretation of body language. For
example, forensic psychologists observe pupil dilation when interrogating a suspect to
determine whether he is telling the truth or he is lying. Also, mentalists often use to
predict a person's thoughts.

Below are some few techniques and facts about the eyes:

• The size of the pupils never changes from birth to death. Hence, it is no surprise
that the pupils of small children are usually bigger than their head and eye size.

• Large pupils always attract men and women because they trigger love and care
subconsciously. It's one reason why we all care for babies. It is one of the reasons
why prostitutes in times past apply drops of belladonna on their eyes. The
chemicals in the belladonna dilate the pupils to make these prostitutes more
attractive.

• The proportionate size of dolls' big pupils makes them attractive to adults and
kids. Typically, adults choose dolls with big pupils as toys for their children. They
assume that big pupils will make the dolls attractive to babies.

• Anime and non-animated characters such as manga are attractive to kids because
of their big pupils. They have larger eyes relative to their head's size. Hence,
animators use this psychological technique when drawing manga Vigures.

• The art of using big pupils as a form of attraction has been the big secret of
industries for the past three centuries.

• You can create a sense of charm in the eyes of the opposite sex by gazing at them
for a long time.

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Dilation and Contraction of Pupils
Thoughts and other sensory inputs determine the dilation of the contraction of human
pupils. Our pupils dilate when we hear new information. Imagine you ask someone to
think of a number between 0 and 20. When you start numbering, and you observe the
person's eyes carefully, you will discover that their eyes will dilate the moment you
mention the number he's chosen in his mind. While you might take some time before
you master this practice, it is simple and effective to read another person's thoughts
through observation. When a man and a woman hear exciting news, their pupils dilate
but in a different way.

Examples of dilation in female pupils:

• Babies

• Scenery

• Any exciting information

Examples of dilation in male pupils:

• Babies

• Scenery

• Exciting information

• Female pictures

The dilation of the pupils is an indication of a person's attraction to you. Since lighter
shade pupil dilation can be observed easily, men and women use lighter shades for the
attraction. Anger, bad moods, sexual arousal can cause the pupils to contract.

A Common Problem All Men Face

Some men have fallen with a woman because of a long gaze. The long gaze has been the
start of most love stories. Some men who proposed immediately to a lady because they
take her longing gaze as a positive sign were rejected. One reason for the rejection is
that men and women have dissimilar psychological and physiological make-up. The

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wide peripheral vision of a woman can make it seem like she is looking at you when in
truth, she's interested in you at all. Thus, the question is, "where should you look when
having a conversation with your potential partner?" a look at her hair or shoulders is
simply social gaze, it has no impact. If you look at her forehead for a long period, you
come across as someone who always wants to be assertive. Regardless of partner
preference, you can induce intimate feelings in anyone by having an extended gaze in
their eyes. However, don’t turn the gaze into a stare; blink regularly. Also, don’t fake the
smile; it won't be long before she Vigures out your fake smile.

When the smile is fake, the eyes won't become small. Conversely, when the smile is real,
there is a slight reduction in the area below the eyes, which creates temporary wrinkles.
If, for one reason or another, you can’t look into the eyes of your potential partner, your
best option is to observe the positive eye contact triangle. It has the same effects as
looking into her eyes.

Looking Up - The Most Commonly Used and Discussed Eye

Position
Most people (including criminals) use this gesture to attract sympathy and love. The
criminals use it to gain the sympathy of judges. Big pupils and a small head position
induce similar feelings of love, attention, and sympathy. The use of the small head
involves lowering of the head before looking up. Your eyes appear smaller when you
lower your head, but your pupils appear larger than usual the moment you look up.
Princess Diana once used this technique. The secret to pulling it off is to make it look
natural. You can only make it look natural through constant practice. Stay in front of the
mirror or create situations where you can lower your head slightly, then tilt your head
upwards. Repeat this gesture often, and it will become natural in no time. While the
message is subtle, and she may not notice it, she will become affectionate towards you.
The best way to register this gesture in her mind is to look into her eyes longingly.

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What causes the attraction for men?
The truth is, men are attracted to certain physical features in women.

The top three of those physical features are:

• Breast. Men are usually attracted to women with reasonably-sized breasts,

which are also well-shaped.

• Buttocks. Biologically, men are wired to desire a lady with a large behind. They
assume it is a sign that the lady is healthy enough to conceive and deliver their
babies. Guys are usually more interested in ladies with rounder butts. Even when
they don’t admit it, men love booty.

• Legs. Most men will turn their heads at the well-toned legs of any lady. The
release of certain hormones at puberty causes the legs of girls to undergo rapid
elongation. Like the butts, men assume with long legs are young and healthy
enough to bear children. There's a joke making the rounds that high-heel
footwear was the result of men's high interest in women with long legs.

What Causes the Attraction for Women?

Women also have speciVic physical features they desire in their dream men. When you
know these features, and you can improve on them, you will have a greater appeal
before your potential partner.

The top Vive of such physical features are:

• Legs. Women assume that men with good-shaped legs will be Vitter potential
mates.

• Chest and arms. Most women associate men with good chest and arms with
self-conVidence, dignity, and courage. Also, they relate strong arms to sufVicient
strength, which can protect them and their unborn children.

• Buttocks. Women relate men with strong butts to be good in bed because they
will have a strong forward pushing action.

• Voice. Women associate men with a deep voice to manliness.

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 • Muscles. Women are attracted to men with big muscles because they believe that
they will have good genes. Imagine having a solid six-pack and a pair of guns.
Now, that's damn attractive to the women!

Here are some other facts about women's attraction to men:

• When a woman is sitting next to her lover, and she is sexually aroused, her
temperature will increase.

• By smelling some men's sweatshirts, some women can choose a perfect partner.
Naturally, they can choose the superior male genetics that's excellent for
reproduction. Hence, smell good by using your deodorant; it will improve your
chances.

• When a man or woman is angry or lying, his/her nostrils enlarge while the nose
tip becomes slightly red. This effect, known as the 'Pinocchio effect,' happens so
that you can inhale more oxygen.

While the body languages that you've discovered so far are still the basics, they are
enough for you as you seek your future partner or a loving relationship. Since an
understanding of the body language will be very important to the next three phases, I've
discussed them after the Virst phase. Hence, you must have a thorough understanding of
the last two chapters about body language before reading subsequent chapters.

Short Quiz To Test Your Non-Verbal Communication Skills

I assume you are just getting started with non-verbal communications. Hence, take as
much time as you need. This is not a timed test. But you need to become more time-
conscious because what makes reading non-verbal cues a skill is your ability to deploy
them quickly enough in the real world. Select the most appropriate option from the list
provided. Each correct answer is a one-point score. The answers are at the end of this
chapter.

Add your score to know how you've performed. You can start now.

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 1. What apt description can you give to this head gesture?

A. Interest B. Impatience C. Anxiety D. Boredom

2. The woman below is on a date, how can you describe her attitude?

A. I don’t interfere in other people's personal lives

B. She Vinds him interesting

C. She Vinds him boring

3. A lady gave the pose below to a guy

Based on the body language, what does the lady want the guy to notice?

A. Her face

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B. Her fair

C. Her hands

4. What does the gesture below depict?

A. Defensiveness B. Boredom C. Anxiety D. Impatience

5. What situation can cause this gesture:

A. When the guy's words seem objectionable

B. When she can object what she's hearing

C. All of the above

6. What conclusion can you draw about the picture below:

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A. They are comfortable in not being comfortable with each other

B. They aren't comfortable with each other

C. They are comfortable with each other

ANSWERS:

1. D

2. A

3. C

4. D.

5. C

6. B

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CHAPTER 4: PHASE 2 - SYNCS CAN FIND YOU THE
LOVE OF YOUR LIFE
Not all good beginnings end up as a love affair even when you have made your Virst
approach correctly. Some persons believe that you don’t have the attributes of a life
partner; you're only good enough as a nice friend. At the sync phase, your aim is to make
him/her think that you are the most suitable life partner for them. Whether male or
female, no one can resist someone who Vits their partner preference proVile.

When you deploy the sync phase properly, you can start making to have some thoughts
such as:

• "She is the one for me; she has all the attributes that I desire in a wife."

• "He completes me in a way I desire."

• "I am not sure there's another guy who can do better than this guy. Should I miss
him, I might live to regret it for the rest of my life."

• "With all I have experienced with him, he can give my children and me the best
care."

Once you can create the sync, these seemingly superVicial references will be within your
reach. It is the sync that makes people believe there is a perfect partner or a soul mate
just for them. However, the reality is that they've met someone who's fulVilled all their
conscious and subconscious criteria of a perfect partner. As previously discussed,
performing research is the key to matching partner preference. Ensure that you take the
sync creation process slowly. You would appear artiVicial, and your potential partner
might think you are faking it when you attempt to rush the process. Creating sync is a
daily process that requires patience until you get it right.

The Classmate Theory

This section discusses sync creation using the classmate hypothesis. Imagine you saw
and like someone as a freshman in college. Then, you were able to initiate a small chat
with him. Thereafter, you discovered that both of you are from the same town.
Subsequently, you discovered that both of you offer the same electives and your dad's
work in the same company. With every passing day, you discovered that both of you

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have almost the same interests in music, hobbies, and other aspects of life. Also, both of
you share common dreams - an astonishing fact! Then, it dawns on her can help each
other because you have similar taste and life ambitions. Thus, both of you can Vigure out
the way to make each of your days more productive and awesome. This is the ideal love
scenario, and it perfectly describes synchronization. This matching and making are
amazing. Anyone can experience these feelings of comfort, happiness, and love
simultaneously.

Below is an analysis of this theory and the conclusions we can derive from the analysis:

1. Nice looks are always the Tirst attraction.

Though most people will deny that there is no relationship between looks and love, the
Virst attraction or repulsion will always be good looks. Being well-groomed doesn't mean
you should put on the very expensive clothing. It should indicate that you look after
yourself very well. Your hair and dress must be neat and tidy. Generally, pay careful
attention to your body. Eat nutritionally and exercise regularly. It will not only improve
your physical appeal, but it will also improve your self-conVidence.

2. The Slowness of The Process Makes The Daily Revelation Of New Facts
Realistic.

It also makes the process exciting. If the process is rushed or very fast, it will appear
fraudulent, and the fun will die quickly. Each part of the process should be an exciting
adventure that will make the whole experience enjoyable.

3. Excellent research is the key to matching his partner preference proTile,

including his concepts and ideas.

This is self-explanatory.

In subsequent sections of this chapter, you will discover proven techniques that aid sync
creation.

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Technique #1: Matching Partner Preference
The matching partner preference should be done after obtaining sufVicient information
about her. Since we fall in love with those who Vit our subconscious criteria.

Here are some criteria you should consider:

1. Background

It is a proven fact that a person's perspective depends on his background. This

perspective includes his place of birth and his childhood experience. This background
can affect any person's views about life. Once you have these data, then it would be
easier for you to create a sense of bond that matches her background. Consciously, she
will think that you have gone through similar experiences as her.

2. Main beliefs

While you may not agree with all her beliefs, you need to identify and match with the
majority of her beliefs. By opposing her beliefs, you might be offending her
unconsciously. Thus, she would start avoiding you. Examples of major beliefs include
bonds with close family or friends. Also, it is important to know her opinion about it.
God. She may believe in luck more than hard work, while you believe solely in hard
work. However, you mustn't start trying to force your beliefs on her, and you don’t have
to pretend or hide your beliefs. Here's a sample of what you can say: "though I believe
luck plays a role in success, most successful people that I know achieved success
through hard work." present your opinion smoothly and gradually.

3. Culture

If you are from different backgrounds, you can resolve such differences in lots of ways.
Your aim is not just to resolve and match these differences but also to create a sync. For
example, if, by your research, you discovered that both of you have varying backgrounds,
you should seek for commonalities in your culture. Thus, you can create that "we are the
same" feeling.

4. Values

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Matching her values is simple and effective. Ask her friends to disclose her values to you.
Through your daily conversation, you can uncover her values and thought patterns.
Alternatively, you can identify these values by consulting with those who listen/talk to
them often. Examples of values include kindness, humanity, and affairs.

5. Pain and happiness

Become her soul mate by researching and matching her list of pain and pleasure. By
matching her criteria for pain and sorrow, you would have registered a feeling in her
mind that you will make her happy for the rest of her life. The logic here is that by
experiencing similar pains or worries, you would be making great efforts to avoid such
issues. The same logic is also applicable to happiness. Suppose you and her are like a lot
of people who love to travel. Then, both of you can relive your most wonderful travel
experience. You could also say I had an alcoholic father, which made me miserable as a
child. Thus, I hate alcohol, and I am making every effort never to indulge in it for life. By
making these statements to a girl who hates alcohol (based on your research), she will
always feel comfortable and safe when she is with you.

6. Ambitious dreams

This criterion is crucial because you need to match her ambitions. When you do that,
then you create the impression that both of you could help each other achieve your
dreams. Consciously or unconsciously, she will take you from the 'temporary' friend
category to the 'forever' friend category.

Here are three other simple and effective matching criteria that you can implement:

Matching Factor #1: Parent Theory

Unless their childhood experience was a disaster or they hate their parents for another
reason, most people usually like those who share similar traits with their parents. For
instance, most men like to marry women who share similar qualities with their mother.
These qualities include scolding, affectionate care, or any other speciVic actions. Once

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you can match those traits, you can win the heart of the man easily because you can
create good sync. For women, they often desire to marry men who have a similar
character to their father. Hence, you can create a striking impression on her mind by
matching those fatherly qualities.

Before attempting these techniques, consider these criteria:

• If the person isn't in good terms with his/her parents, this technique will fail
completely.

• Mostly for silly reasons, most teenagers hate their parents at one time or another.
Even though these feelings are temporary, don’t implement this technique when
she is in her mood swing. Your Virst step is to make her realize the value of
parenting. Then, you can start applying these techniques gradually.

• Through your personality and the manner you present yourself, you can erase
the trace of any bad quality they might not like about their parents.

Matching Factor #2: First and Second Child

Those who grew up as a single child, the older of two children or, the younger of two
children have different approaches and outlook about life.

Hence, you should approach your potential partner accordingly:

• Most single children are selVish because they have never lacked anything in life.
For example, she never had to compete with anyone for her toys. So, you have to
take care of her that way. Satisfy her above her needs and give her constant
attention.

• The younger of the two children was always free and pampered. But always
receive proper guidance from the older sibling. Hence, like an elder sibling, you
should scold them but also pamper them.

• In any family, the Virst child has had to experience neglect and the various cycle of
events. Parents often give them less attention than their siblings. Hence, they are
less understood by their parents. Also, they must always take responsibility since
they are older than their siblings. Elder children always require the love and

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 attention they lacked from their parents. They want a partner who is ready to
share their happiness, pain, and thoughts with them. Since elder children suffer
more, you can attract and sync with them easily by proving your worth.

Matching Factor #3: Childhood

While we all have different childhood experiences, there are two broad categories of
childhood life:

• Good childhood days

• Miserable childhood days

There is no prize for guessing the one which we all want to recreate and the one which
we want to avoid by all means.

You can determine the category an adult belongs to based on how he describes his
childhood life. If they are a part of the Virst category, then creating sync with them is
simple. Share similar childhood experiences with them and how you are re-creating
such experiences in your life at the moment. Thus, they should be interested in you so
that they can relive those childhood memories. Both of you can take a trip to those
places where they usually visit during their childhood days. However, going together to
those places doesn't give you permission to propose to her. You're still getting to know
each other.

For those that are part of the second category, never bring up any topic (especially
topics about childhood experiences) or visit any place that will make them recall they
had terrible childhood memories.

Apart from the matching criteria, there are other proven techniques useful for creating a
sync with your dream partner.

Technique #2: We Are The Same

This is similar to the matching criteria. It involves identifying and sharing common
attributes between you and your potential partner. Don’t limit the search for such

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attributes to a particular area of your life; these attributes should encompass all parts of
lives. Create perfectly synchronized personalities by sharing common morals and
attitudes. For a greater impression, you can magnify the common attributes through
exclamation remarks. For example, suppose both of you love movies, you can say, "wow,
I never knew our common attributes are this deep." thus, you are sending her a
subliminal message that both of you have a lot in common. Over time, she would start to
believe it Virmly that both of you have lots of common attributes. With excitement, she
would start telling her friends how both of you are similar in a lot of ways.

Technique #3: Plan It

Anything that would be successful requires a plan. In management, the 'garbage theory'
states that problems and answers are similar to wastes in a garbage can, they can
proffer solutions despite meeting up accidentally. From a management perspective, this
theory might be valid, but in love terms, it's an inapplicable theory. Everything requires
a plan and proper execution, you can’t leave anything to chance. You must make a
conscious effort for anything you desire to achieve, including getting together with your
dream partner. Planning each conversation is proof that you truly desire her, and with a
combination of other techniques, your dream partner will be yours. Also, planning the
details about each conversation is important, and identifying topics you can discuss is a
key part of planning the details about each conversation. Don’t forget that topics you
bring up should create a feel-good factor in her. Proper planning is key to taking your
relationship to the next higher level.

Here are the steps you should take to develop an effective plan:

Step 1: Write down all her likes and dislikes in a new notebook

Step 2: Update step 1 based on your research and her reaction to the previous topics
that you've discussed.

Step 3: Record special occasions and topics about her

While the use of a notebook, especially updating the book, can be stressful, it is a
necessary step in your quest to win her love. It will help you to cover all the details
about her, even the minute details which will prove effective in winning her over.

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Technique #4: I Complete You
This technique requires some level of proof, which you will discover later on in this
chapter. But once you implement this technique, she will start believing that you are the
only one that can help her to achieve her life's goals. As humans, we have our strengths
and weaknesses; we know what we lack and what we have in abundance. She will
consider you as worthy of being her life partner when you can help her Vill her wants
almost every time. We all have mentors whom we would like to emulate either because
we want to achieve what they have made or we lack what they already have in
abundance. Thus, if you have speciVic attributes, those mentors who can help them to
fulVill their needs, they will respect you, love you, and believe that you can be their life
partner. Also, they will start spending more time with you because they also desire to
have those qualities.

Here are some speciVic cases to clarify this technique:

Shy vs. ConTident

If you discover that your dream partner is shy. It is highly likely that she admires
conVident people and desire to be conVident. Even if they don’t admit it or share this
problem with anyone, they will always love and respect a conVident person. Hence, when
you present yourself as a conVident person, she will seek to be closer to you and acquire
those qualities from you. It is when she gets close to you that she might disclose her
shyness problem to you and seek your assistance to overcome it.

Introvert vs. Extrovert

If she loves being indoors, then you can show up as an extrovert. However, some people
enjoy their introvert status. If your dream partner is one such person, you don’t have to
show up as an extrovert. You can be an introvert or an extrovert, and they will love you
for your personality.

Dull vs. Intelligent

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Some people won't score good grades no matter how hard they study, and it's not that
they hate to study. The best way such people will love you is to show up as intelligent
and share your methods with them. The techniques that will help them to improve their
memory and score good grades. You can even develop mnemonics for them to aid their
memory improvement.

Technique #5: I Am Different

Here's a statement that depicts uniqueness. "I am different from the other guys you've
met. I don’t believe every woman is an object of pleasure. I view them as understanding
friends. Their sensitive nature gives them a better understanding of our feelings. Also,
their boldness guides towards the right path, just like a mother would do."

Let's analyze this statement:

• Most people are either sensitive or bold; they are rarely both. Hence, including
both words in the statement seems contradictory, but in this context, the lady
doesn't see it.

• The placement of the word "mother" is a subliminal message of care and respect
for women.

• The term "understanding" is included to make her aware of the quality you
desire in your dream woman.

However, remember to alternate the words you use. For example, use the word 'mother'
during the early phases of the relationship. You don’t want to create the impression that
you are too young to be in a relationship with her. You will discover more about this
alternation in the next phase. The essential point that you want to demonstrate is that
you are different. You are different from those who cheated her, disappointed her, or left
her for no reason. By the way, there is a reason for everything; those who left must have
at least one reason for leaving. They just didn't want to disclose their reason(s). Again,
present yourself as unique and conVident. But never let her know that you know her
story. She will reveal those details to you after the research phase of your relationship
when you must have gotten closer.

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Matching The Body Language
Matching her body language and looking deeply into her eyes for an extended period
create the same effect - cause deep feelings in her. While previous work at the conscious
levels, the effectiveness of this technique lies in the fact that it works at the
subconscious and unconscious levels. Hence, the results might not manifest quickly.

Here are a few examples:

Example #1: Posture

In this context, posture can be sub-divided into two parts:

• Matching her posture

• Having a good posture

Matching her posture

This involves moving hands similarly, walking at the same speed, and even sitting with a
similar pose. However, you must do it in a way that won't attract suspicion. If she
observes that you are copying her posture, she will feel insulted.

Having a good posture

Develop the habit of having an excellent posture. Sit straight; you look conVident and
relaxed. When you are talking, use your hands and raise your chin. Imagine your posture
when you are listening to a boring lecture. You will almost be sleeping, or your spine will
be down. Compare that posture to your posture when you are watching an exciting
movie. When you are with her, always assume the posture you would adopt while
watching a fascinating Vilm.

Example #2: Talking

You can create sync by matching talking. This doesn't mean you should repeat his words
word for word. What you can match is his pitch, the topics he puts up for discussion, and
the speed at which he talks. Also, you can use similar gestures.

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Example #3: Intellectual Matching
Since you have to portray yourself as more intelligent than her, it can hard to pull off this
technique. Moreover, some people can feel insulted that you are showing off your
intelligence. Worse still, she might think that you can’t be a match for her because you
seem overqualiVied, and her opinions may seem foolish in your eyes. Hence, carefully
match your intellect with hers. It will make her admire you rather than being offended.

What Next?

After creating the sync, your next step is to apply the 'you are special to me' technique. It
will make her realize that you want a relationship that is deeper than a friend-friend
relationship. This step is where most people fail. They will start well, establish matching
criteria, but they won't become more than a friend. Without applying this technique, she
will only have a preconceived idea that you are just a friend.

Though you should portray yourself as a conVident, independent person, you can still
seek her counsel about an issue that is giving you some sleepless nights. Tell her that
you have not shared the problem with anyone else, and you will appreciate not telling
anyone else about it. Hence, you are giving her the impression that she is more than a
friend to you. When she offers words of advice, listen and, if relevant, implement her
advice. But don’t give her the impression that her opinion is irrelevant even when the
view is irrelevant. She will also be happy, but she will start wondering why you are
sharing your deep issues with her alone. If she asks you to explain your reason(s) for
sharing your deep problems with her, here's a response you can use,

"since we both have similar likes and dislikes, I could only think of you to seek your counsel
when I had this pain. I believe you will understand my pain better than anyone else.
Fortunately, my instincts were right. Your words are like a soothing balm. No one else has
done this for me before now. Thank you very much!"

You can reframe this statement or use another one but ensure that the message gives
her the perception that she is unique in a way that she won't argue or negate it. Apart
from sharing your pains with her, you shouldn't leave her out of your moments of

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happiness. Thus, she won't assume that it's when you are in pain that you reach out to
her. Even during these moments of happiness, let her know she is extra special.

Here's a statement you can use:

"I am about to tell you a secret. So, don’t tell anyone yet. I felt you should be the Birst to
share in my happiness since you were with me during my struggles."

Cover It Up with Words

From the examples shared above, you must realize that there are no accurate statements
you can use. The sentences or statements, but the core message must not change. There
is scarcely any beauty in the direct expression of words. You must express what's on
your mind in attractively. When you want to appreciate or condemn her, do so in a
pleasant way. A side disadvantage of using direct words is that you will be creating a
blemish in your relationship should she oppose your words.

Here are examples of statements that you can use to share views in a way that would be
pleasant to her.

• "Actually, I am on the same page with you. Let me express it in a better way."

If she is putting on a beautiful dress, the statement below is better than just saying,
'your dress is beautiful.'

• "My gosh, this dress looks great on you. But then, you are also beautiful in your
right. I am not sure if it is the dress that brought out your beauty, or you brought
out the beauty in the dress."

For optimal results, follow up your statements with more complimentary words.

Though you must identify or create common attributes that can match you to her
partner preference when creating the sync, you mustn't express these commonalities
directly. If you do, she may not believe you. You must shroud your expressions using
beautiful words. Stories are one of the most effective ways of doing this. You can use
different stories to portray your trait that matches her partner preference. However, that
trait shouldn't be the key theme in the story. One of your old friends should be the main
character in the story, while his experience will be the central theme. But make sure

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your story is convincing enough to have the desired effects on her. That trait (which
matches her partner preference) will stick out from the story to her, and it will create a
positive impression on her mind for a long time.

From this phase, you discovered proven methods for creating syncs. Below is a summary
of this phase:

• Research her partner preference

• Be patient with the sync creation process - it can take some time

• Open up to her gradually and in an exciting manner

• You must pay attention to her background, dreams, signiVicant opinions, morals
and values

• Perform a thorough analysis of her childhood

• There is a different approach to an only child, the elder of two children and the
younger of two children

• Create an impression of similarities between both of you.

• Make her realize what's unique about you

• You should fulVill a lack that she secretly desires

• Always share your hidden pains or happiness with her

• Create a plan for each chat or conversation

• Don’t express anything directly, beautify your message using stories, including
your friends' stories

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 CHAPTER 5: PHASE 3 - AROUSING HER
ADDICTION TO YOU
Making him addicted to you goes beyond partner preference. After respecting and liking
you, you must take it a step further so that he can be madly in love with you. Also,
beyond the frequent chats, let the few days you didn't chat be like eons or years to him.
Ever heard the words, 'love is like a drug'? It is very true. But you have to get him
addicted to it. This phase is where you move from being a special friend to a level where
he can’t do without you daily. The psychological techniques here are more powerful, and
they can create a lasting impression across his conscious and subconscious mind. When
you apply these techniques, you won't end up as a best friend but will achieve your
desire to be a lover. In this chapter, you will discover indicators of interest and how to
spot them. Then, how you can take it a level higher to end up in the lover zone.

Before you continue reading, bear these two things in mind:

• Without proper knowledge of body language, you can’t apply the techniques here
perfectly. So, if need be, re-read the chapter about body language.

• Most people (including your friends and loved ones) might see these techniques
as mind manipulation. It is not! Hence, keep these techniques secret; don’t share
with them your loved ones, not even your dream partner.

With those things out of the way, let's get started with these techniques:

Technique #1: Push-and-Pull

This is the most widely-used technique around the world. It involves pushing him away
and pulling him in periodically. The confusion that this technique creates is what makes
it popular. It is this confusion that will force him to think about you constantly. Since all
emotions start (including love) and end in the human brain, you can induce the right
feelings through careful manipulation of the stimuli that control brain activities. When
you push him away at one time but pull him in at another time, he will start wondering
about your true feelings about him.

Some of the questions that he will start pondering upon are:

• "Am I a friend, or is she in love with me?"

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 • "How exactly does she feel about me?"

Bear in mind that there is a subtle and artistic way of applying the push-and-pull
technique. You can’t push or pull with much force. If the force of the pull is too much, he
might take you for a needy person. He might assume that you are already in love. Also, if
the force of the push is too much, he might believe that he annoys you. Thus, he might
leave never to return. The secret of success when using this technique is balance. The
push or the pull can only be effective when the gauge is precise.

It is one of the techniques pick-up artists use to seduce people within a short timeframe.

This technique and mixed signals share some similarities. Both of them can get the
desired person confused and attracted to you.

The push-and-pull are of two types:

• Mental (this is mainly performed with words)

• Physical

• Mental Push-And-Pull
It is when you get close to him that you can apply the physical push-and-pull.

But you can get close to him by applying the mental push-and-pull, which involves the
use of words in chats and conversations.

Here are some statements that can pull her and push her:

• "You have beautiful smiles, but so are mine."

• "I have only seen one amazing person in the last two days - you."

• "Your perfection and understanding are out of this world... Are you real or an
angel?"

• "We would have been good together, but unfortunately, I can’t commit to a
marriage."

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Each of these statements contains a push away statement and a compliment. Study
these classics very well and practice creating yours. Depending on the level of
relationship, you can deploy advanced dialogues of attraction.

While these sentences are classic push-and-pull statements, they are not suitable for all
phases of the relationship.

So, use them as they Vit into the relationship.

• "Your dress is horrible. But you might be better without them"

• "I can’t resist your cuteness again. Get out of my line of vision."

• "It seems your seduction acts is to make me fall in love with you... You know what?
You might be right because I am falling already"

• “When you are around me, stop wearing that blue dress. I can’t just take my eyes off
you each time you wear it.”

When your love journey reaches that advanced point, delivering these sentences or
similar ones can make your relationship thick. If you don’t change your usual
conversation with these types of dialogues, you might never become a lover; you will be
stuck in the normal friend zone. The strange feature about love is that it requires time
and distance. The push-and-pull statements or actions give him the time and distance to
keep thinking about you. His thoughts during this time are signiVicant. It is only when
the other person is thinking about you that there is mutual love.

• Physical Push-And-Pull
The freedom to touch him is the requirement for applying the physical push-and-pull
technique. Physical conditions can cause more profound effects.

• After a few seconds of hug, you can say, "I can’t breathe, let's end the hug already."

• Hold and check out his hands, then, say "Holy cow, lovely Bingernails but... Boring
Bingers. Hang on a second; you have warm and pink palms."

It is natural for anyone to wonder what's going through your mind when these words
and perform these actions.

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Mix the push and the pull throughout your love journey.

Technique #2: Shifting Gears

If you don’t apply this technique, you will remain in the friend zone forever. Shifting
gears simply means switching from general chats to personal topics with time. The main
beneVit of shifting gears is to keep moving your relationship higher till it reaches your
desired level (for example, marriage). However, you must observe signs of interest from
your potential partner before implementing this technique. Such signs can include
smiles, starting of conversations, or even calling for both of you to hang out. Another
sign of interest is to notice his reaction when you don’t initiate the chat for a few days. If
he gets in touch with you within this 'gap' period, then you can take it as a sign of
interest. Thus, giving a reason to take the relationship to the next level. Though you can
discuss sex, you must do so in moderation. It is an action that will make you stand out
from the rest of the pack. However, you must not fail to discuss it as it is key to taking
your relationship beyond the friend zone.

But choose your words carefully when trying to bring up the discussion about sex.

Below is an example of how to introduce sex into your conversation:

"Recently, I read a philosophy book by Osho. In the book, he equated sex with meditation
and suggested that partners should create a separate room solely for sex purposes. Like a
prayer room, partners should only enter the sex room after bathing, place their footwear
outside the room, spray the room with a lovely fragrance, and allow natural lights into the
room. He stated that this setting would magnify the positive emotions of having sex with a
lover. Regardless of the truth or falseness of his claims, I would love to try it out in the
nearest future. Would you?"

Also, introduce other unusual topics into your discussion. These should be rare topics
that her other male friends will be too scared to discuss. Again, always identify signs of
interest before introducing such topics and present them artistically. The truth is, most
girls won't respond to sex discussions positively. But they will call or text you the next
day for a possible hangout. Guess what? They want to hear more about it even though
they would never admit it. Girls always sex and other uncommon topics, but you must
learn to present each topic appropriately.

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Technique #3: Apply The Rule of Demand And Supply
Demand and supply are always inversely proportional. If supply increases, demand
decreases and vice-versa. Sometimes humans can be a commodity since the brain can’t
differentiate between a commodity and a human. If you can make a human with no
Vlaws and market him properly, some would be willing to buy. Historically, the slave
trade is an example of human marketing. A job interview is a modern example of human
marketing. When you are making your character lovable during an interview so that
they can hire you, you are selling or marketing yourself. There are many times you must
have marketed yourself. Thus, you are subject to all the demand and supply rules in
economics. If the supply for your skills is readily available in the job market, then you
won't be in demand. Similarly, if you are always available for your potential partner, he
won't appreciate your constant availability. At times, the best way to create good
demand is to reduce your supply.

Create the impression that you have something else to do by not being available at all
times. Act busy even when you don’t have anything to do; it will create the notion of a
busy and important person. Hence, she will appreciate the value of the small-time you
spend with her.

Technique #4: Anchoring

Anchoring is the practical use of Pavlov's instinctive response in neuro-linguistic
programming (NLP). In his now-famous experiment, Ivan Pavlov (a Russian
physiologist) discovered that an object or an event could cause a condition response.
Pavlov demonstrated his theory by ringing a bell before feeding his dogs. He repeated
this procedure for a while. He discovered that each time he rang the bell; his dogs were
already salivating for food. Their brain has associated the sound of the bell to the
availability of food. We can apply this same method with humans. Anchoring is the
association of speciVic actions, colors, or words with speciVic mind emotions. With time,
you can create a semblance of feelings with this action, color, or words. For example,
suppose she has just been through an awesome experience, and she's excited about it.

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You can touch her elbow and say the words, "that's a great feeling, isn't it?" then, you can
always repeat this action for each of her wonderful experiences.

Subsequently, each time you touch her elbow, and she associates the touch with a great
feeling even when the experience is ordinary. Apart from touching her elbow, you can
also induce a unique impression in her by creating a particular tune with your Vingers or
moving your hand in a speciVic manner. For optimal results, here are some
precautionary measures you should take:

• Use a few anchors on her

Lots of anchors all over her body won't induce that great feeling that you desire.

• Use a small anchor

The anchor shouldn't be large; if it is large, it won't capture her mind. It should be a little
action. If the anchor is too big, she may be more interested in the anchor than the topic.

• Don’t stop inducing the feeling for too long.

From Pavlov's theory, the dog's salivatory response is because the bell is ringing. But if
you keep ringing the bell without giving the food for a long time. Then, the dog will no
longer salivate when he hears the ringing of the bell. The same thing applies to the use
of the anchor technique in humans. Stop using the anchor for a short time. Then, start
using it again to induce those emotions. If you stop using the anchor for a long time, it
would no longer create your desired effect.

Technique #5: Take Care of Her Securities/Insecurities

Everyone is always concerned about his security. Unfortunately, most people pay less
attention to this "security." There are two securities which you must be mindful about:

• Her story

• Her security when with you

• Her Story

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We all want to be sure that our secrets are safe when we share them with anyone. She is
no different. She will only start sharing her intimate feelings and experiences with you
when she believes that her secrets are safe with you. Hence, you must create this bond.
Rather than using direct statements that her secrets are safe with you, make her deduce
that sense of security from the stories or experiences that you share with her. It will
solidify her trustworthiness in you.

• Her security when with you

We all desire for someone who will care for us, and one way to show that you care for
her is to show concern about her welfare, including her security.

Simple actions that show you care about her security include:

• Advising her to eat healthily and exercise regularly

• Reminding her to put on the seat belt when in the car

• Asking her to lock the doors when in the car or she is about to sleep

You can also think about other similar simple actions that can create the impression of
security in her. These actions act as proof that you have the capability of taking care of
her for life.

Technique #6: Give Her What Others Won't

Even give her what she denies herself. Probably, she is short, and people mock her for
being short. Then, she's gradually having a fear of going out because she doesn't want to
be mocked for her height. You can give her words of consolation by telling her that her
good heart more than compliments for her height, and that is the most important. You
can also compliment her rather than consoling her. Suppose she has short curly hair. You
can say, this short curly hair is the best hairstyle that brings out the beauty on your face.
The key is to praise her or comfort her based on her deepest worries. It will lessen her
fears and can be your gateway into her heart.

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Technique #7: Dealing with Differences In Partner
Preferences
In previous phases, you have discovered how to match partner preference. But what if a
difference in 'partner preference' in her head is the only barrier to having a relationship
with her? Then, you should deploy the following methods to remove this barrier:

• Present this difference slowly

Your manner of presenting this difference will determine whether she will listen and
compromise (your desire) or withdraw into her shell (which is what will happen when
you give it to her suddenly or harshly).

Assuming she prefers an engineer to a doctor. During one of your conversations, you
could say that your admiration for technology made you sought for admission to study
engineering, but you had to settle for being a doctor after a chance discussion with the
counselor of the university where I sought my admission. Also, another factor that
inVluenced your decision was pressure from home, and the opportunity of getting a job
quickly.

• Let her friends speak to her on your behalf

When her friends praise you and make good remarks about you to her. Then, she might
compromise on her concepts to accommodate you in her life. Don’t forget to use good
friends.

• Use subconscious programming

Subconscious programming is a powerful technique that alters people's perception of

you. Though you need more knowledge and practice to implement this technique, here
are some simple and useful tips for implementing this technique:

• State the time statement time and again

• Express your ideas with metaphors

• Be convinced about your presentation

• Ask to be sure that her opinion about related ideas remains the same

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Technique #8: Idea SpeciTicity
Relate your idea to a speciVic area of her mind. Thus, you will remain unique to her, and
she keeps you in mind always. Your presence or her thoughts about you should
symbolize an idea or an emotion. This idea speciVicity technique is crucial because it
creates a feeling that is stored in the part of the brain responsible for the recollection of
memories.

Here are proven ways to implement this technique:

1. Name your feeling about her

You can say, "each time I hear your name, there is a unique comfort that goes through
my mind. These feelings are like the icing on cakes and splashing in the sea. It's similar
to a trail of gunpowder with you like the match which lets it spark, bringing out my soul
to play." then, continue the conversation naturally. A few minutes after, ask her to
describe how she feels each time she remembers you. Don’t forget to ask nicely!

2. Send a text

Create a particular emotion in her by repeating a word or character. The repetition of

this emotion will register in mind and form a correlation between you and her.

Technique #9: Obliterate All Fears

She may have some hidden fears preventing her from falling in love with you. Such fears
could be public opinion, family advice, cultural differences, or personal concerns. Hence,
you must destroy these fears before she can fall in love with you. You may have to
combine your efforts with that of her friends to obliterate these fears. If, after getting
very close to her and she is yet to fall in love with you completely, then she may have
some hidden concerns in her. Even when she doesn't disclose that there are such fears.

Technique #10: Prove That You Are In Demand

Applying this technique increases your value and makes you preferable to her other
options. Here are two proven ways to show that you are in demand:

1. Seek her friends' help

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Her friends are your best option to boost your perception of her. Your common friend(s)
can share fascinating stories about you with her. The theme of this story should be an
attribute about you that she would Vind interesting. Thus, boosting your perception and
value.

2. Experiences

Share the experience of being wooed by a girl. The girl's wooing shouldn't be the key
theme, but it should come up naturally in the story.

The principle being exploited here is a fundamental principle in human psychology; we

want something desired by a lot of people.

For instance, the desire for an iPhone. Even if the newly released model does not have
any superior function, the popularity of the brand creates a huge demand for their
newly released phone. Similarly, portraying yourself as someone desired by many
people increases your value. It is also the same technique for retaining your value. If you
are always available for a chat, it is highly likely that your value will reduce drastically.

But if her friend shares an experience that shows you are in demand by other girls, she
will appreciate your worth even if she hasn't realized it before now.

Technique #11: Trust Her

Trust her better than any other person. Most people rarely share their deep emotions
with others because no one will support them. Despite having many friends, some
people don’t have conVidants, and its conVidants who are the largest supporters of
dreams and ambitions. But you can be that missing conVidant for her. It will give you an
advantage over others because you now occupy a special place in her heart.

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 CHAPTER 6: PHASE 4 - MAINTAINING RELATION
While this might seem like the easiest part of a relationship still in its early phase, it
isn't. Don’t be like most people who assume that this phase is unimportant. Even if you
haven't gotten into the relationship, let alone maintaining it, don’t skip this section. You
must be well informed about the hurdles you might encounter in your relationship
journey. You might be convinced that you don’t need any advice to maintain a
relationship because you have sufVicient knowledge, experience, or both, consider these
facts:

• Numerous evidence suggests that breakup is the reason for sadness in 7 out of
10 people.

• Most people get into relationships just to experience the fun. But start having
emotional feelings as the relationship goes on. Hence, they experience more
considerable anguish when the relationship breaks up. Caveat: don’t start a
relationship for the fun of it. Also, don’t use the techniques in this book to start a
relationship for fun or to hurt. I am solidly against it

• The pain of losing your dream partner after attracting her into your life is higher
than not attracting her in the Virst place. So, don’t be sad when you can’t attract
her.

I am sure that you've had friends who have experienced breakups. Apart from the
sadness, most of them rarely understand psychological causes for the breakdown. Their
supposed reasons for the breakup is illogical - it might be the effects of the psychological
cause. Hence, it is necessary to prevent break-ups before they happen. Ensure that you
maintain the passion in your relationships for life. Some lovers started their marriage
with hot passion, but after two or three years, they just couldn't tolerate each other.
Oftentimes, their happiness and smiles during their early phase of love have no basis. It
is no wonder that they are unable to retain the spark in their relationship.

Below are some causes for these breakups and the best remedies for these causes:

Cause #1: Boredom

At the initial phase of the relationship, the two persons are just starting to understand
one another.

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Typically, this involves:

• Sharing deep thoughts

• Revealing hidden secrets about each other

• Exploring each other slowly.

When there are no more mysteries or secrets to share or explore, the spark in the
relationship starts to reduce. There is a reduction in the spark of the relationship. Every
day is now a routine, while every other thing becomes habitual. Imagine listening to the
same song every day for two years. This same scenario happens in relationships.

Though it happens in reality, most people won't agree that they can experience boredom
with their relationships. But the truth is, new things excite us. Hence, it is no surprise
that partners in love may be at loggerheads as the relationship goes older. Examining
her response to your questions will help you to observe the drop in passion.

Here are some situations and their corresponding interpretations.

1. Pupil Dilation

Recall our discussion about pupil dilation. Exciting news, information, or experience can
cause a dilation of the pupil. This is one way to gauge responses. Another way is that she
avoids looking into your eyes. Also, her response to your text messages is another cue
that you should observe.

2. Ignoring Message

Short replies or being online without checking your messages, let alone replying to
them, indicates that she no longer wants to be with you because she has become bored
with you. Remember the social media has made it easy to know when someone is online
and when a message has been delivered. At the initial phase, they might give reasons for
ignoring your message such as, "I was busy with house chores, and my phone was in
silent mode." or "I forgot my phone in the other room while I was in the living room."
even if these reasons are genuine, the fact that the issues persist suggests that there is
more to the problem than she is letting on. However, it is a bad idea to keep asking them
why she continues to ignore you. It will only give her more reasons to ignore you
because she already has a negative impression of your relationship in her subconscious

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memory. Even when the external conditions remain the same, there can be a drastic
drop in texting time.

This is clear proof that they are no longer interested in you. But if she is undertaking a
new course, it might be true that she no longer has your time. Compare your text
communications in the early phases of your relationship to the current phase. The days
of inserting emoji’s in the text are long gone. These subtle changes are a reVlection of her
emotional state of mind. If she replies with smileys and stickers, then she has much
more to say, but she is not willing to say it directly. But if she only replies with short text
messages without the emoji’s, then, she's trying so hard not to ignore you completely.
But these actions prove that she's not interested in the relationship again.

Cause #2: Running Out of Discussion Topics

Whether through chats or meet up, once your potential partner can’t bring up any topic
for discussion, it is proof that she no longer Vind care with you. Also, she is neither
secure nor comfortable with your presence. As humans, we can never exhaust topics for
discussion. We only feel that we can’t discuss that topic with a particular person, or the
person isn't worthy of the discussion. Often, the second reason is usually the case. When
she starts saying that she's done talking or she can’t think of any new topic for
discussion, then it is proof that she doesn't want to share anything with you again.
Remember that during the early phases of your relationship, you always share even the
dumbest things. Why? Both of you just wanted to have reasons to communicate. During
that time, bringing up new topics every day came Vlawlessly. Compare that time to the
present, where she now has nothing to say.

You have to realize that you are the one who is not important anymore, the topics for
discussion never really mattered in the Virst place. Sharing mundane things, such as an
ant bite, never really mattered during the initial phase of your relationship. But when
she doesn't want to discuss anything with you, no matter how mundane, she has
something to hide. She will likely be sharing her marriage invitation card with you the
next time you meet. Pay close attention to the loss in the attachment.

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If you don’t pay attention to it, you will have a break up which can cause depression for
you. Few weeks after the break-up, you might deny that you want her since she doesn't
want you. But there are ways to resolve your differences.

Solutions to the Causes

In the previous section, you discovered issues that can cause a breakup; you will
discover solutions to this problem.

Solution #1: Keep Up the Momentum

So far, you have discovered various techniques to maintain the excitement and freshness
of your relationship. Constantly applying these techniques is the key to keeping your
relationship fresh and exciting. The relationship froze immediately; she has nothing to
explore in you or vice versa. She will see you as someone who isn't ready to explore, but
someone who sticks to a regimented routine and is unwilling to change - an attribute
that annoys most women. Also, you have discovered how to use surprises to create
unusual awesome experiences in people.

Hence, they start thinking:

• "I won't mind having another surprise like this one again. Will there be one?"

• "My gosh! I feel special now."

Since we now live in a world of limited attention, gifts, or surprises are one of the ways
to stand out from the normal. Even when your potential partner claims that there is
more to love than gifts or surprises, she won't still mind receiving them.

Solution #2: Keep Something New for Every Day

Ever heard the Chinese proverb: "the best time to plant a tree was twenty years ago, the
second-best time is today"? In terms of relationship, the question is, the next best time
to make each day exciting is today. Both of you can’t hope for something special to
happen. You have to make it happen. Then, the question is, how can you make each day
exciting? What are you expecting from her, which you've never heard or seen from her
before now? Similarly, what are you yet to share with her or do for her before today?
There must always be something fresh that each of you expects in each day of your

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relationship; it's what keeps the passion in your relationship strong. If you don’t want
the love, passion, and happiness in your relationship to suffocate quickly, then don’t
make it predictable. There are simple ways to avoid predictability. For example, you can
create unexpected adventures.

You can say, "Next Thursday bears some signiBicance in your life, and it also has similar
signiBicance in my life. No, I won't tell you the signiBicance yet. All I ask is that you pray for
me, would you?"

From that time, she would start to think about what you told her and what could be the
surprise or importance of that day. While that day can be something as simple as the
Virst day you met, the essence of this strategy is to ensure that most of her thoughts are
about you till that next Thursday. It will make her more attached to you.

Solution #3: Don’t Open Yourself Up Completely

This is an essential strategy because it is the best way to maintain the excitement in
your relationship. The more things she wants to know about you, the more she will be
attached to you. You can get started by sharing an experience that's happening daily.

Solution #4: Visit New Places

There are two primary reasons why visiting new places will help you to maintain the
momentum in your relationship.

• Both of you will spend time together to plan the trip; this increases the time you
spend together. Also, she will always be thinking about the journey which makes
her be continually thinking about you as well

• Since both of you will choose an exciting place for your trip, she will always have
sweet memories of her experience during the journey. Once in a while, you can
always refer to that experience since it will relive a delightful experience in her.

Strive to choose a unique place for your trip; it will magnify the uniqueness of the
experience and the memories associated with it. Where possible, include special events
during the trip, it adds to the memorable experience of the journey. Both of you will

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quickly forget a bus ride during the trip because it's normal. But a car break-down
during the trip will create a lasting memory because it was an undesired extent.
However, it doesn't you should deliberately plan for a car break down. Far from it, you
should prepare carefully to avoid unwanted experiences during your trip. While it's not
a good idea to include friends as part of your journey, you can always make exceptions
provided the friends are a couple. Also, ensure that both of you don’t have an important
event that might fall on any day of the trip. Otherwise, you will be distracted by this
event, and you won't experience the joy of the trip.

Solution #5: Trivializing Changes

Have you wondered why a seemingly perfect relationship ended? Maybe you have
experienced one yourself, or perhaps the experience is that of your best friend. Based on
my experience, change is the only reason why a 'perfect' relationship will end abruptly.

This change can occur in two ways:

• Changes to your lover's partner preference

• Changes to you which makes you unsuitable for your lover again

Here's a detailed analysis of each of these changes:

• Changes to your lover's partner preference

There are various reasons why there can be changes in your lover's partner preferences.
One of such reasons is a priority change because of an incident. The effects of the
experience might have been so huge that her perspective about life and people changed
completely. It might be a disappointment for someone close to her and with similar
partner preferences as hers. It could even be that she was 'faking' her behavior or
lifestyle from the beginning of the relationship. (note: if you get to Vind out that she was
faking it right from the beginning, then, it is cheating and not the change to her partner
preference. Hence, this is not a valid argument for the cause of the breakup.) However, if
an unsavory experience was the cause of the breakup, don’t ask for details about the
experience. But, you can ask for updates (if any). Also, don’t try to provide any judgment
about the experience, your opinion about it should be completely unbiased.

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Suppose your poor background wasn't a drawback when you started your relationship.
But her perspective about it might change because she witnessed the misery of a
woman living with a man who couldn't cater for his family. Then, coincidentally, on the
same day, she saw how a rich man was pampering his wife with extravagances that she
couldn't help but think that the wife of the rich man must be living luxuriously. Instead
of condemning both experiences out-rightly, your best option is to enlighten her about
each event. You can give her examples that show the selVishness of wealthy people. Also,
give her examples of undying love, which couples of little means share. The media and
age may also change people's partner preferences. For example, our life ambitions and
priorities Vive years ago might be different from our life ambitions and priorities today.
As we grow older, our life ambitions might change because of changes in our friend
circle, mental maturity.

• Changes to you which makes you unsuitable for your lover again

You might have changed in attitude, perspective, lifestyle, experience, or a combination

of all these factors from the time you started your relationship. Hence, you no longer Vit
the partner preference of your lover, or she no longer Vits your new perspective of
partner preference.

Most times, we don’t agree that we've changed. Rather than accept that we have
changed, we blame others. Before you became lovers, you made all the efforts. Even
during the early phases of the relationship, you were wholly dedicated to her. Perhaps
unknown to you, your actions portray you as a match for her partner preference. But
sometime after starting the relationship, you stopped doing those things that got excited
about and interested in you in the Virst place. She assumes that you were masking your
real character so that you can get her. Thus, you become boring to your partner, and
both of you start losing interest in each other. Once this trend continues, your lover will
start withdrawing from the relationship gradually. The best solution is to be yourself
right from the beginning of the relationship; practice what you preach. Otherwise, you
will always live in constant worry all the days of your life because you don’t want your
'fake' identity to backVire on you.

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If you implement all the techniques discussed in this book properly, then you won't need
to lie or fake your identity to get you, dream partner. You can make compromises in your
life, but you should never lie. Assuming she doesn't like smokers or those who do drugs,
then you should truly stop the habit. Thus, when she asks, you can tell that you stopped
smoking two weeks ago, which wouldn't be a lie but the truth. But don’t go back
smoking or doing drugs again. If you are truthful about yourself with her, then you
wouldn't have to be afraid that you have some hidden secrets or lies which can be
revealed at any time. Also, analyze yourself at least once in a month to observe any
change. Ask yourself some critical questions and be truthful with your responses. Some
questions you can ask are:

• Have you been out of sync with her in the last month? Even if there are no
hiccups in your relationship, pay attention to the sync levels. Are you on a hyper
sync or hypo sync level?

• Have there been changes in your perspective of partner preferences? This

requires a thorough examination because you might have experienced changes at
the subconscious level, but your conscious mind isn't willing to accept that fact.
Hence, your body and brain's natural reaction is to start withdrawing from her. I
strongly advise that if you are no longer interested in her, stop the relationship
immediately before it gets too far. It's only fair on her.

Solution #6: Use Reverse Psychology

Before learning more about reverse psychology, bear in mind that you shouldn't be
using this technique all the time. It is a subtle form of manipulation which, when used
continuously, can ruin relationships permanently. With that out of the way, what is
reverse psychology? It is a powerful psychological technique to inVluence others into
doing what you desire from them by suggesting to them the exact opposite of what you
desire from them.

Keep these factors in mind when using this technique:

• Be calm and composed. You will put your partner off by using the wrong tone,
being demanding and controlling, or displaying any form of anger.

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 • Present the more unpleasant option Virst

• If you can’t hone the skill subtly, don’t use it at all

Examples of situations where you can use reverse psychology:

1. You want him to attend an event with you

Start a conversation and say, "Dan asked me if you would attend Jim's party. I told him you
wouldn't. When you pressed for a reason, I told him you don’t like attending parties that
you would prefer to stay indoors. He burst into laughter before saying you might not even
behave properly at the party since you never attend one anyways."

Why this works: You took the issues beyond the two of you by using your friend's view
about him. This opinion will Vire him up to attend the party and behave charmingly and
socially.

2. Getting Her to Be Ready in Time

Suppose you are meeting a few friends for dinner, get ready on time. Then, say calmly, "I
have told our friends not to wait up for us for long. When they asked why I told them that
you don’t usually get ready in time. So, they shouldn’t expect us on time than to piss them
off."

Why it works: Stating the truth without shouting at her or accusing her should compel
to her get ready in time. Also, she will want to change your friends' opinion about her
lateness, and she would want to prove you wrong at least this time.

Always remember to construct truthful sentences because your partners may decide to
authenticate your story. If the incident isn't real, train your friends well to avoid things
falling apart.

Don't use a person she hates for this purpose. Though she might not cross-check with
the person, she might hate the person more, which can nullify the intention of your
conversation.

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Solution #7: Make Your Relationship Secret
Who would you prefer a public relationship or a secret one? A secret relationship is
better because the thoughts that go through our minds are stronger than what happens
around us. Love starts and ends in the mind. When you think about a person always,
your attachment levels to her increases signiVicantly. Also, secret love requires more
thinking because you need to eliminate several limitations to your relationship. By
constantly thinking about each other, your relationship becomes more in-depth and
more complete. The amount of time you spend thinking about someone is proportional
to the sadness or happiness you will feel about the person. If you have ever lost a loved
one, then you must have felt an unbearable pain at that time. But after a while, their
thoughts no longer Vlood your mind. Sometimes, you may only think about them once
per month. Even then, the thought of their death isn't that painful again compared to the
time the incident happened.

One reason why you felt less pain is that you now spend less time thinking about them.
Hence, your attachment levels with the person (whether he is a sibling, close friend,
colleague, or even a parent) have reduced signiVicantly. It is often said that time is a
healer. Your attachment levels with a person will reduce when you spend less time
thinking about him. Hence, you must create reasons for your partner to constantly think
about you and your relationship. Otherwise, there will be dullness in your relationship
since the attachment levels have dropped. It takes time and effort to maintain a
relationship. It also requires long-term commitment and Vinding solutions to problems
when they arise. Some people end relationships once there are little problems in the
relationship. A few might Vind solutions to the issues and move the relationship forward.
A lesser few don’t believe that the problems can be solved; hence, they will prefer to end
the relationship.

If your partner is willing to end the relationship due to little issues in the relationship,
then you should realize that she never loved you from the start of the relationship.
Finding solutions to problems in a relationship strengthens the relationship. But you
must resolve these problems with emotional calmness and balance. Also, don’t use
negative statements when you're trying to resolve the problem. Use positive statements.
Replace statements such as, "you don’t care about me" with "if you truly care for me,
then, you can..." again, at the risk of sounding like a broken record, never become a fake

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person to match partner preference. Make changes to your lifestyle, but don’t fake it.
The best way to match partner preference is to portray your unseen qualities and
develop additional excellent qualities.

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 CHAPTER 7: ADDITIONAL TECHNIQUES OF LOVE
Apart from the techniques discussed, there are more situations and techniques required
for love. In this chapter, you will discover an analysis of these situations. Let's get
started.

Situation #1: Falling in Love with Very Beautiful People

Let me ask you a question: do you think a good-looking person will fall for you?

The answer is a resounding yes! A beautiful person can fall for you. The problem is, you
give up before making a move because you have made some wrong assumptions.

Assumption #1: You don’t stand any chance because lots of people would be after
her as well. This assumption is completely wrong. There have been various examples of
a physically attractive person getting married to someone who is less physically
attractive. You only need to shift your mindset that she can be yours. Then, once you
apply the techniques in this book, she should be yours.

Assumption #2: You don’t Tind your physical body attractive. The problem is not
your body; it is how you are presenting yourself. However, it is not a surprise; most
people with a less attractive body usually have that mindset of inferiority complex. Thus,
they are always shy and lack conVidence when approaching people with hugely striking
physical attributes. They are always so overwhelmed by that person's beauty that they
become sudden stammerers while trying to strike a conversation with that person. The
truth is, your opinion about yourself is more important than your physical attributes. Be
conVident in your appearance, have the belief that you can attract your dream spouse
and apply the techniques in this book.

Assumption #3: Her popularity. Her popularity may make her feel like you will be
irrelevant to her. But always motivate yourself that you are unparalleled. Often, the
opposite is always the case. Others will also lack the conVidence to propose to her
because of her popularity despite having lots of fans. Even if they have the courage, they
won't understand the phases of love or the right techniques to apply that will attract her
to them. After reading this book and applying the techniques in it, you won't have to
worry about the competition because you would have become a professional.

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Don't be like everyone else who is complimenting her for her beauty. Compliment her
based on another attribute - an attribute rarely mentioned by anyone else. Such
attitudes can be her honesty, humility, and support for the needy. Also, approach her like
a mutual friend, and you will discover that she will embrace your friendship.

Situation #2: Background Vs. Elite Family

Suppose you are from a normal background while your dream spouse from an elite
family (for example, a celebrity or a top government employee). Regardless of the
barriers, they are not insurmountable, so long you believe that love will be successful.
The 'catching attention' phase (the Virst phase of love) is the primary reason for the
failure of this type of love affair. While your Virst move must be impressive enough to
start a conversation, staring at movie posters or watching through the window doesn't
count.

If this situation applies to you, here are proven ways to attract your dream spouse:

Way #1: Get the Tirst phase right. Most people won't succeed because they can’t get
this Virst phase right. Remember the popular Walt Disney quote, "our dreams can become
a reality provided we can pursue them courageously."

Way #2: Presentation is key. If your dream spouse is a celebrity, presenting yourself as
someone in the Vilm industry can do the trick. Be conVident about your job and
personality. You won't stand a chance by appearing shabby and presenting yourself as a
homeless person.

Way #3: Syncing is hugely important. A medical doctor will probably prefer a medical
doctor as his 'partner preference.' Ensure that you understand your dream spouse's
partner preference. Then, use the techniques discussed in previous chapters to match
his partner preference.

Way #4: Slow and steady wins the race. As you've discovered from previous chapters,
thinking about someone constantly deepens our attachment levels with that person.
Start by sending at least one message per week. Thus, you will respect their busy
schedule, which prevents them from chatting frequently. But send follow up messages.
Since you won't get to meet them constantly, the follow-up messages will make your

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communication interesting. Then, you can start increasing the number of times you
message gradually. If you are in the same industry, it will not only be easy for you to
create a Virst impression, it will also increase the possibilities of regular meetings.

Situation #3: Falling in Love with A Person Who

ObjectiTies Others and is Materialistic
Those in this category also believe that money is the only basis of life. Your best option
is hope. You have to hope that within that time, her perspective of life will change since
we all change with as we grow older. Besides, you can attempt to change their
perspective about life using previously discussed techniques. A person's views and
beliefs can change based on life events. Hence, the simple and effective way to change
that perspective is to let her experience new and exciting memories that will make her
see another perspective about life. However, don’t ask them for any opinion about the
experience after creating it for them. Give them the time to relive the experience. But
don’t stop at one experience; create subsequent ones for them periodically. Presenting
opposing views is another way to change her opinion about life. Even if they don’t agree
right away (which is to be expected), it will register in their subconscious memory for
some time. You can also try subliminal messaging to change her perspective.

However, ego and other deep-seated beliefs won't make some people change their
beliefs. Assuming she hates an actress, then, you can show her a movie where the
actress performed brilliantly. If she isn't yet convinced about the actress's prowess in
acting, then it is highly likely that she is egoistic. She's part of a group of people who
can’t be convinced to change regardless of the situation. One reason for their egoism is
that they are constantly concerned about the opinion of others about them should they
change their stance. Much like body language, always seek out congruence in her
personality. If her stance doesn't change, research, and identify another belief that she
holds strong. Then, seek to change that belief by giving her experiences and proofs that
can change her belief system. If she doesn't change again, it is sufVicient proof of her
egocentrism. The truth is, it would be near impossible for you to live peacefully with a
person of such personality.

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The Thought Web
Now that you have recognized the various situations where you can apply speciVic
techniques of love, you must understand the thought web. Recall that I told you to
always wrap up your themes with stories and not speak directly. The thought web is
similar to that technique, and it can also inVluence people's thoughts. Thus, you can
direct the conversation in the way you desire. Here's an example:

Me: today was majestic, I ate the most iconic Italian pizza ever

Jim: Which place did you eat it?

Me: The Ming's cuisine. Dean offered me a treat, and I didn't want to refuse him

Jim: Why did he offer you a treat?

Me: I suggested a book for him to read. The book's title is "how to make anyone fall in love
with you." when he applied the techniques in the book, Betsy (his dream partner) fell in
love with him.

Jim: Wow! That book must be an absolute gem

Me: (cuts in), Of course! I used the book to good effect, and it's only natural that I
suggested the book to him.

Though I wanted to sell my book to him, I didn't want to ask him directly. I wanted him
to ask for it, and I wrapped my 'ask' in a clever story. Also, buying this book will need in
his life, I don’t have such need. Always keep in mind that the central theme of the story
should always be about the need of the person listening to your story. It will help you to
move the conversation in your desired direction. Since you are not in such need, don’t
present yourself as one. Also, ensure that your storyline is fail-safe. Betsy and dean must
be in a relationship, or Jim should be unable to reach dean or Betsy.

You can recreate this conversation while chatting, which makes it easy for the
conversation to Vlow in your desired direction. Since each of your response triggers a
particular question from him, it is easy to guide the conversation in your desired
direction. It is like playing chess, but in which you're already at least Vive moves ahead of
him.

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 CHAPTER 8: SUSTAINING THE PASSION AFTER
GETTING MARRIED
After getting married, it is important to sustain the passion of the relationship to avoid
creating unwanted marital differences.

Often, the lack of good sex is one of the causes of marital differences.

According to Seth Stephens-Davidowitz (a data scientist), Google searches for 'sexless

marriage' are four times more popular than 'unhappy marriage.' They are even eight
times more popular than 'loveless marriage.' Thus, they are the most-searched marriage
complaint.

"Making Love" In A Heavenly Manner.

Anyone can have sex, isn't it? Wrong. There is an art to having sex. If you want to have
sex like animals, then you don’t need any art, special skill or knowledge. But the
expression of sexuality is different in humans. Surprisingly, statistics show that most
married couples aren't satisVied with their sex life after marriage - 75% for men and
85% for women. Hence, they resort to extra-marital affairs. Despite all your efforts to
get married to her, wouldn't it be a big shame to lose your dream spouse to another
person because you can satisfy her sexually? There is more to being intimate than
having a strong masculine stature or a strong love. When the process of lovemaking
becomes one-sided, the other person starts losing interest. Over time, she would have a
sex partner outside your marriage. It will require a whole other book to discuss the
techniques and secrets of lovemaking.

On this page, you will discover a sneak preview of tricks and techniques that will give
you another perspective about lovemaking. There are several articles and videos on
lovemaking, but most of them mislead the populace, and those who engage in it don't
derive any pleasure from it.

For an easy understanding of this topic, I have grouped lovemaking into three:

• Before sex

• During sex

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 • After sex

Before Sex
Four factors create pleasure during the pre-intimacy phase:

1. Taking it slow is key

The main beneVit of taking it slow is that it gives you time to observe the details, no
matter how trivial. If you make it fast, you will climax quickly and won't enjoy the
journey. Whereas, it is a slow journey that creates those sweet memories. A side beneVit
is that you and your spouse's reproductive organs will be adequately lubricated.

2. Eating right can make you a better lover

While it may seem silly, you won't have a pleasant sexual experience by engaging in sex
when you're overfed or on an empty stomach. Also, you can boost your hormones by
researching, identifying, and consuming natural herbs that are available in your region.

3. Create a clean and pleasant environment

Apart from taking a bath and putting on fresh sex before sex, you should also create a
tidy and sweet setting. Arrange the room tidily and remove any form of distractions that
can affect your sexual performance.

4. Understand your partner perfectly

Your partner's age and sexual preferences will strongly affect the type of sex she desires.
Find out whether she's more interested in pre-intimate activities than the actual sex
itself. Also, Vind out whether she prefers it in the morning than at any other time of the
day.

During Sex
Four factors create pleasure during sex:

1. Stroking softly

In contrast to a hard grasp, a soft touch creates a relaxed and smooth feeling.

Over time, you will learn to balance the soft touch with the hard touch to create the best
sensual feeling in your partner.

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The nails and teeth are your best options for this purpose.

2. Touching the right parts

As you touch each other, pay careful attention. A woman will never tell a man to touch a
speciVic part of her body. But if you pay attention to her body language, you will
understand which part of her body that you should touch. If she focuses on the part of
her body, it is an indirect way of telling you to touch that part of her body.

3. Use the phase shift method

The phase shift involves switching back and forth from being the giver to the receiver. If
you start the kissing, move one step backward after a while and allow her to do the
kissing. After a few minutes, take charge again. Then, keep switching between these
phases.

4. Use your eyes and hands

Create a deep affection in your partner's mind by looking directly into her eyes during
sex. Also, keep your hands busy throughout sex. Use your hands to perform soft and
hard strokes over her body or touch her at various erogenous zones such as the
underside of her butt, underboob, labia, nipples, clit, and the back of the neck.

After Sex
It doesn't stop

Reaching climax doesn't signal the cessation of sex. Immediately after sex, don’t get
away from the bed. If you do, you are giving your partner the impression that she is a sex
tool. The best thing to do after sex is to remain awake and keep looking into each other's
eyes or cuddle each other till you are both asleep.

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 CONCLUSION
Congratulations!!! I am thrilled that you completed this book. I hope you are as excited
about implementing these techniques as I am by sharing them with you. There isn't a
shred of doubt that you can apply these techniques to get the man or woman of your
dreams. Listen, I hope you don’t let this guide collect virtual dust. Start implementing at
least one of these techniques tomorrow morning. Keep in mind that your mastery of
these techniques depends on how well you practice them. Thus, I strongly suggest that
you re-read chapters 1 and 3 get a good grasp of the content in them before reading
other chapters. They are the foundation on which you will build the other techniques.

More importantly, I want you to keep me updated with your results.

Shalom!2

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