In this madness, I'll keep your words close to my heart

Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at http://archiveofourown.org/works/48235468.

Rating: Mature
Archive Warning: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Category: F/M
Fandom: Akatsuki no Yona | Yona of the Dawn
Relationships: Romance - Relationship, Frienship - Relationship, Loyalty - Relationship
Characters: Yona (Akatsuki no Yona), Jae-Ha (Akatsuki no Yona), Son Hak
Additional Tags: Snippets, Short Story, set in between chapters, Random thought, mature
because its meant to be a little more dramatic
Language: English
Stats: Published: 2023-06-29 Words: 3,654 Chapters: 1/1
 In this madness, I'll keep your words close to my heart
by satsumaimo (Nebelflecke)

Summary

What if Yona had a second chance to go and see Hak at the barracks? Would she ask Jae-Ha
to leave again or would she listen to her heart this time?

Notes
See the end of the work for notes
It’s so late at night, I do not even know how close we are to breaking into a new day. I’ve
been trying my best to keep things from escalating but I know everyone is getting worried….
Everyone is growing restless.

“Hak….”

Yona opened her eyes not realizing the tears welling up and running down her flushed
cheeks; this monsoon only mimicked the pain she was letting herself get drowned into. She
has lost count of the time she’s been put in total isolation from everyone she cares about,
from the one she loves and it was breaking her heart.

Looking down at her hands, she saw they trembled in response to the emotions swelling her
spirit. Ao was curled and asleep in her lap, her beloved little companion—her little piece of
home. Caressing her fluffy cheeks with her thumbs, Yona took a deep breath and looked up
and out her window; her eyes moving in the direction she guessed the barracks were headed,
hoping to get some sort of closeness to Hak, who had just joined the army of the Sky tribe.

With a sigh, Yona rested her arms on the wooden frame and hid her face under the thick
sleeves of her tunic, and broke into tears. She threw herself into the unknown by half-
confessing her true feelings to the person she cared for the most and shared a kiss that could
have lasted an eternity if the circumstances had allowed it. Such a kiss should never be
ignored or forgotten, not even with all the madness they were going through.

She closed her eyes, and let her mind take her back in time; back to that moment, she felt so
much awe and happiness her heart could explode in her chest. Yona traveled back to the exact
time she felt his lips claiming hers with so much devotion. Hak was devoted to her, and he
put into that kiss many things he didn't allow himself to share for years.

Despite the pain wearing her down, and the bruises and wounds on her ankles, Yona could
not feel anything while she was in complete possession of Hak’s protective hold. Despite the
smoke, despite the fire coming close, she felt safe and happy because he was there; he had
gone for her and he was silently telling her how much he loved her.

Her heart started racing with the growing need to be with him; her lips started to ache in his
absence. The more she remembered his hands holding her face, the more she wanted to throw
everything into the hands of fate and go after him. She wanted to see him. She wanted to be
with him. This was unfair.

To Yona, it was a crime to be kept away from her friends, but to be pulled away from Hak felt
like a sin. A rush of desire washed all over her; she felt she had to fight. After all, the
greatest warrior of all had shared his power with her; she had to fight. This wasn’t over.

Yona opened her eyes again and cradled Ao with her as she went to look for her cloak. With
this rain pounding the ground, she could find a way to disguise her moves just as Jae-Ha had
said when he offered to take her before she turned him away. If only Ju-Do didn’t come to
check on her, she would have taken Jae-Ha’s offer; if they were not so exposed to the dangers
lurking inside the palace’s walls, she would have already taken her bow and arrow and shot
whoever stood in her way to get to her family, and most of all, to get to the one that owned
her heart.

“Yona dear,”

Her eyes widened and turned swiftly over her shoulder to find the adored green dragon
soaking wet by her window. He had returned, despite her attempts to scare him away—he
knew.

Yona kept her surprise to a minimum to avoid getting the attention of whoever might be
guarding her chambers outside. “H-How…?”

“Do you really expect me to believe you did not want to go see him?” Jae-Ha said with a
complicit smile, “I can understand why you are trying to stay away from us—the dragons. I
know there is more for us to know and I will wait for your call. ” His smile grew with
kindness, “I am also old enough to tell when a maiden suffers from matters of the heart.
Come on, Yona dear. He’s suffered enough too.”

“Jae-Ha….” Yona held her evident tears, “I don’t want to hurt any of you because of my
foolish actions,”

The beautiful green dragon stepped down the window with extreme care and walked over to
her to give her a supportive hug. Of all, Jae-Ha felt the most pain from seeing how his loved
ones were being torn apart and the second he knew Hak would be put under surveillance, he
could feel the excruciating pain Yona could not express with words to keep appearances in
front of the king and his court. But he also knew she didn’t want to put Hak through more;
she was protecting him like the most precious thing in the world—her world.

Hak had been open enough with Jae-Ha to know he had devoted his life to the princess for as
long as he could remember without expecting anything in return. Despite his own desires and
the dreams he could have possibly had, or the opportunities he was given to share his life
with someone else; Hak only had eyes for Yona and it had been this way for an awfully long
time, not even Jae-Ha, with all the experience he had with matters of the heart, could even
tell with accuracy.

“The only foolish action I see is how you’ve been trying to restrain yourself from seeing him
and everyone else agrees,”

“E-eh?” Yona blinked. Her tears had started falling without her consent. Jae-Ha leaned closer
to dry her face with his sleeve, although the moisture caught from the rain didn’t do much of
his purpose. He sighed, “Yun wants you to be careful, Zeno is encouraging you to find a way
to sneak out and meet with the lad. Shin-ha found Hak’s exact position, and Gi-ja is ready
and waiting for a sign to swipe everyone out of your way in case it's needed.”

Yona glanced down, feeling her heart being squeezed with the love and support she could feel
from them even in the distance. “As for myself,” She heard him say, “I will keep repeating to
you how I will be your legs whenever you feel you can’t walk. I will take you anywhere,
whenever. We’re together in this, even if we’re limited in options, we can still find ways to
help.”
Looking up, Yona broke into tears, “Jae-Ha….”

Jae-Ha put his arms around her in support, “I know where he is. I know how to catch his
attention without startling the other soldiers in the barracks. If there’s a good time to go and
see him, it would be now, Yona dear.” He offered the princess his hand, “I'll watch over Ao,”

Yona felt hesitant, but took Jae-Ha’s hand either way and followed him to the window.
Turning, he pulled off his cloak and put it over her to disguise her in the dark. “Even if it's
pouring outside, there is still a full moon that could give us away if the sky decided to
suddenly clear up,”

Yona nodded and held on tight by putting her arms around Jae-Ha’s neck as he took position
and studied where to take his leap and into the dark, they went. At his request, she hid her
head under the cloak to avoid any more risks but she could feel the pull in her stomach every
time the green dragon landed and took another high leap to get to their destination.

They had finally landed. Jae-Ha was quick to pull Yona close to him as he leaned on a back
wall just mere feet away from the camp where he knew Hak was staying. Much to his luck,
he had studied the surroundings and memorized more than one place he could use to hide,
being this the perfect opportunity to keep up with the second part of his plan, “Yona-dear, see
that wall over there?” He pointed ahead, “The lights you see are from Hak’s room.”

Yona felt her stomach flip, she was close; so close.

“There is a storage room around the corner, I will take you there.”

Yona looked up, “But isn’t that room in constant use? If it's for storage, soldiers might be
going in at all times….”

“I have been spying long enough to tell no soldier will go in at this time of night.” Jae-Ha
smirked, “My, he’s gonna get pissed when he finds out I’ve been stalking him more than
usual. I won’t hear the end of it.”

His comment pulled a chuckle out of Yona. True, they may have grown incredibly close, but
Hak still very much liked to have his privacy. He’s been like that ever since she can
remember.

The strong sound from the rain had put everyone in a deep sleep, swallowing their steps as
they made their way to said storage room and found a place for her to hide. Jae-Ha smiled
and put his hand out for Ao to jump on it, “Wait here, Yona dear. I’ll go bring your beast of
lighting.”

If it wasn’t because of the pitch darkness she was taking shelter from, Jae-Ha would have
been able to see the bright flush in her cheeks. She watched him walk with much caution to
the area he had pointed out to be Hak’s room and saw him disappear behind a wall. She
waited with her nerves threatening to ruin her adventure, wondering in doubt if Jae-Ha would
be able to achieve his goal and get to Hak without anyone noticing.
Her hands started to tremble, he was taking more time than she would have liked; she was
growing concerned. Yona tried to open the heavy door but she was too scared to be caught.
She had to stay strong, the dragons were with her in spirit and they were supporting her—she
had to be brave. She had to trust.

She pressed her back on a wall and slowly slid down, time becoming a matter of concern
again.

A creaking sound caught her off guard. Yona raised her head ever so slightly and tried to take
a peak from her hidden spot behind many sacks of rice and other cooking materials. This was
one of the barrack’s food storage.

Her eyes could not spot anything in such penumbra; she wasn’t even sure if she was looking
in the right direction. It was so dark and cold, she was no longer sure if this was a good idea
anymore. Standing up with as much care as she could, Yona tried to go inspect closer when
she felt a pair of arms wrapping around her waist, keeping her in place. Her eyes widened;
her heart stopped. She knew that feeling, and she knew those arms by heart.

“Princess,”

Her breath got caught in her chest at the sound of his voice. Her eyes burned with tears as his
warmth started to bleed into her like water leaking through a wall. She slowly turned and was
instantly drawn to the scent she had memorized in great detail from all the times they shared
a tent together—it was him. He had gone for her, again.

Yona could not take it any longer, but before she broke into tears she felt being pulled in a
tight and protective embrace. Her face was pressed against his chest, she was so close she felt
his heart beating as strong as hers was pounding her chest, demanding her attention. She
started to shiver and feel weak in the knees; her hand knew where to go and after what she
felt like an eternity, she could tell she had reached for his face. It was him, finally, she could
hold him.

“I’m so glad you’re safe….” Yona whispered, but she already knew he was more than aware
of her feelings. He could read her like an open book. “I was so worried… They have been
terribly unfair with their demands and conditions….”

Hak exhaled, still with his arms holding her tight. “I expected nothing less from any of them.
With the dragons in their domain, of course, they would try everything to keep you isolated,”

“I’m talking about you, Hak,”

“Don’t worry about me, Princess. I’ll be back by your side in no time….” Hak slid down the
wall with her in his arms, holding her close. “Just wait for me a little longer…”

Yona clung to him as if her life depended on it and answered with a nod. She didn’t need to
tell him anything for him to know she was terrified of what could happen if their efforts were
destroyed by the advisor’s ambitions.
She heard him click his tongue in his usual fashion for when he was disappointed about
something, “Hak?”

“I can’t stand not being able to look at your face,”

“Don’t be silly, this is all we can do for now,”

Hak chuckled, “I can’t help it…. I’m too much in love with you to care,”

Yona’s heart flipped, and her cheeks felt like burning. She wrapped her arms around his waist
and tightened her hold on him, reciprocating the feeling in a more physical response. She
could be brave in many things, as she has grown in experience, but when it came to love, she
was still a girl that lost all coherence when around the one she owned her heart. If only she
could be as blunt as him on that front, she thought. Maybe if she did he would feel less
troubled, less worried for her.

She turned to press her face on his chest, her hand was quick to get a hold of the charm she
had gifted him for his protection. It was easier for her to find it with the tunic he was wearing
to sleep. “H-How did Jae-Ha find you?”

“Like I wouldn’t tell he’s been stalking me,” Hak muttered, “I knew he would come back
after he found out where I was staying,”

“You shouldn’t have let Yun’s side….”

“Part of why we’re here is because you wanted to give Yun the opportunity to chase his
dream and study medicine with the best,” Hak rested his head on Yona’s shoulder, taking in
the soft scent of jasmine in her hair, “I know you’re trying to protect me, please don’t. It’s me
the one that should be protecting you from everyone here,”

His words echoed in Yona’s heart. Protecting her? He’s given his life for her so many times.
He’s risked his patience and his own feelings for her sake—he’s been always on the line of
war for her. Yona’s hand released the stone and pressed it on Hak’s chest, right where she
knew he had one of the many scars he’s earned in his duty as her bodyguard, and couldn’t
help feeling crushed. She ached for him. Their need for each other was bigger than anything
else at this moment.

Pulling back from his hold, she turned to hold his face in her hands and pulled him to claim
his lips in a kiss that could pour out all the things she didn’t know or was too shy to say. After
all, he was her childhood friend—she’s known her for most of her life and now, she couldn’t
live without him. How could she put that into words? There was no time….

Yona felt him respond with the same tenderness she was putting into the kiss, feeling
completely in awe at how someone so strong like him could be so gentle when it was about
her. His lips were sweet and gentle, he was kind but also hungry for having been apart for
what felt too long. Hak gently held her head and tilted her to the side to deepen the kiss
without making her feel overwhelmed by the action; her soft moans and heavy breathing
were the answer he needed to know she felt the same way as him. Her hands slid up to hold
his hair into her fists, she didn’t want it to end and she was more than certain she didn’t want
to let go despite their time together closing to its end.

Hak let her do whatever she wanted with him; he had never felt so raw and wanted in his life.
Completely surrendered to her, he let her roam her hands down his neck and into the folds of
his tunic to caress his chest when he suddenly felt her pull back, breaking the kiss abruptly.
“Princess?” He frowned at the dark.

“I want to protect you too,” Yona said between her fast breathing. “Don’t ever ask me not to
try when all I want is to see you smile,”

“Prin—“

“I don’t want you to feel sad ever again….” Yona said in a soft cry, “I can’t stand it. Not,
after all, we’ve been through. After everything you’ve done for me…. Even when I was at
my worst behavior you've never left my side.”

“If you keep talking like that, Princess, I’ll become spoiled,” Hak said with enough emotion
to break his voice. “I won’t know how to keep myself from stealing you away regardless of
what that advisor is planning to do with me.” His hand reached out to dry Yona’s tears,
“Please don’t cry.”

“How can you even say that when I know I’m responsible for keeping you here?” Her
frustration only grew, “Because of my decision to come here….”

“It needed to be done,” Hak said as he held her close again, “You’re not keeping me here. I’m
here because I want to—because I live for you. How many times do I have to tell you this?”

“H-Hak, I—“

“They can try to crush me all they want,” His hand gently cupped her cheek, “As long as you
want me by your side, nothing can stop me from fighting, and to their bad luck, that's
something I know how to do well,”

Yona leaned closer and pressed her forehead on his, “I’ll always want you by my side, Hak.”

“Then, that’s all I need to know,” Hak leaned closer and kissed her again, this time with more
need and desire. Yona responded the same way and held on to him as she gave in to the
claims of her heart and burst with so much love for the man in her arms.

They held each other as if their lives depended on it. Neither of them wanted the little time
they had to come to an end.

“I love you,” Yona whispered in his ear once she heard Jae-Ha gently tapping the door to let
them know it was time to go. Hak felt his eyes burning with tears, thinking how she could
even think she had no power when all she did was to give him strength every single time he
felt like breaking and losing control. Yona had the power to pull him back from any pit of
madness, or any worry that clouded his soul.
Her words were the balm he needed to heal the wounds no one could see but her. Her touch
was the shelter he needed from the storm; her lips the certainty that he had a safe place in her
precious heart.

“I’ll keep those words close to my heart, Princess,” Hak kissed her tears, “And I intend to
make them worth your while once I am reunited with you.”

It was his turn to hear Jae-Ha’s second warning and helped a very startled Yona stand with as
much care as possible.

Nervous and excited about his response, Yona turned to give Hak another tight hug before
she went back with Jae-Ha. “I’ll be waiting,” she mumbled against his clothes, hoping not to
sound too corny with her choice of words. She was still too self-conscious whenever she was
around him when to Hak, it’s more than he ever dreamed of.

Once the door was opened, Hak’s flushed and teary face was shown to the green dragon who
could only stare at him with wide eyes, “Hak?”

“It’s the rain,” He turned his glazed stare at his close friend with tremendous gratitude,
“Please….”

“You don’t even need to ask,” Jae-Ha patted his shoulder, “I’ll make sure she gets back safe
and sound,”

Hak nodded and turned to Yona who looked even more flushed than he did. Yona looked up
at the sky and let the thick droplets wash away the remains of the pain she’d been carrying
with her ever since they parted ways. “Oh, look at all this rain,” she wiped her sleeve over her
face and turned to Hak with a shy glance. “Don’t forget, Hak,”

Hak answered with a grin, “I have a good memory, Princess. Don’t worry.”

Yona slowly let go of his hand and held tight to Jae-Ha, waiting for him to use the great
power of his divine gift to take them back to the palace, thinking how she had never been so
grateful for a storm in her life, as she was right now.

With dawn breaking the cloudy sky, Yona watched the green dragon go back to the villa he
shared with the rest of the dragons with eyes so full of gratitude and a regained conviction
that this fight was far from being over, but also, that she was her own army with the support
from the dragons and the thunder beast standing proud by her side.
End Notes

It's been a long time since I've written anything but I had this crossing my mind ever since I
read chapter 187.
This is my first attempt at writing something for Akatsuki no Yona, and I am not a
professional writer.

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