MontyPython FourYorkshiremen
MontyPython FourYorkshiremen
Michael Palin
: Ahh.. Very passable, this, very passable.
Graham Chapman
: Nothing like a good glass of Chateau de Chassilier wine,is there
Gessiah?
Terry Gilliam:
You're right there Obediah.
Eric Idle: Who'd have thought thirty years ago we'd all be sitting here drinking Chateau
de Chassilier wine?
MP
: Aye. In them days, we'd have been glad to have the price of a cup of tea.
GC
: A cup of COLD tea.
EI:
Without milk or sugar.
TG
: OR tea!
MP
: In a filthy, cracked cup.
EI
: We never used to have a cup. We used to have to drink out of a rolled up newspaper.
GC
: The best WE could manage was to suck on a piece of damp cloth.
TG
: But you know, we were happy in those days, although we were poor.
MP
: Aye. BECAUSE we were poor. My old Dad used to say to me, "Money doesn't buy
you happiness."
EI
: He was right. I was happier then and I had NOTHING. We used to live in this tiny old
house, with great big holes in the roof.
GC
: House? You were lucky to have a HOUSE! We used to live in one room, all hundred
and twentysix of us, no furniture. Half the floor was missing; we were all huddled
together in one corner for fear of FALLING!
TG
: You were lucky to have a ROOM! *We* used to have to live in a corridor!
MP
: Ohhhh we used to DREAM of living in a corridor! Would have been a palace to us.
We used to live in an old water tank on a rubbish tip. We got woken up every morning by
having a load of rotting fish dumped all over us! House!? Hmph.
EI
: Well when I say "house" it was only a hole in the ground covered by a piece of
tarpaulin, but it was a house to US.
GC
: We were evicted from *our* hole in the ground; we had to go and live in a lake!
TG: You were lucky to have a LAKE! There were a hundred and sixty of us living in a small
shoebox in the middle of the road.
MP
: Cardboard box?
TG
: Aye.
MP
: You were lucky. We lived for three months in a brown paper bag in a septic tank.
We used to have to get up at six o'clock in the morning, clean the bag, eat a crust of stale
bread, go to work down the mill for fourteen hours a day week inweek out. When we
got home, out Dad would thrash us to sleep with his belt!
GC
: Luxury. We used to have to get out of the lake at three o'clock in the morning, clean
the lake, eat a handful of hot gravel, go to work at the mill every day for tuppence a
month, come home, and Dad would beat us around the head and neck with a broken
bottle, if we were LUCKY!
TG
: Well we had it tough. We used to have to get up out of the shoebox at twelve o'clock
at night, and LICK the road clean with our tongues. We had half a handful of freezing cold
gravel, worked twentyfour hours a day at the mill for fourpence every six years, and
when we got home, our Dad would slice us in two with a bread knife.
EI:
Right. I had to get up in the morning at ten o'clock at night, half an hour before I went
to bed, eat a lump of cold poison, work twentynine hours a day down the mill, and pay
the mill owner for permission to come to work, and when we got home, our Dad would
kill us, and dance about on our graves singing "Hallelujah."
MP
: But you try and tell the young people today that... and they won't believe you.
ALL
: Nope, nope..