Remember – Christina Rossetti

The poet

It is not necessary to know too much about Rossetti in order to appreciate her poem but it
helps to have an understanding of the context (historical, social, and personal) in which a writer
produces work.
Christina Rossetti was born in London in 1830. She grew up in a
home filled with writers and artists (her father was a poet and her
mother was a well-educated woman and an acquaintence of the
famous writer, Lord Byron). All three of Rossetti’s siblings went on to
become writers and one of them, Dante Gabriel Rossetti, became a
rather influential artist and poet.
Rossetti wrote many poems and achieved notable recognition in her
own lifetime. She has achieved greater critical acclaim and
recognition in more recent years, however.

Rossetti produced poetry of various styles but she is particularly

remembered for her sonnets (one of which we studied last year as
part of the Grade 11 syllabus) in which she displayed an unconventional approach to
commonly held notions associated with love.

At first glance

Apply what you know to the poem on first glance. Before you have read the poem you can
identify a few things.

How many stanzas?

How many lines?
Is there a regular rhyme scheme?
Is there a regular rhythm?

When you answer those questions, you come to the obvious conclusion that this poem is a …

SONNET!

Fourteen lines with no line breaks, identifiable rhyme scheme, regular rhythm. Sonnet!

If you know that, then you should be looking out for the common aspects of the sonnet
structure. Is it Petrarchan or Shakespearean? Where does the change in tone come? Is it after
the octave? Or is it right at the end in a rhyming couplet?

In this case there is no rhyming couplet. This points to the fact that this is a Petrarchan sonnet,
and we would expect a volta to appear in line 9 at the beginning of the sestet. As we read the
poem for the first time, look out for the things mentioned above. Also, try to grasp the basic

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story of the poem (Who is involved? What are they doing? Where are they? etc.). Lastly, take
note of anything that stands out to you. It could be an interesting word or phrase, a strong
image, a satisfying rhyme… Anything at all.

General characteristics of a sonnet

Remember:
• Sonnets are ALWAYS 14 lines.
• The 14 lines are broken into an octave (8 lines) and a sestet (six lines)
o There are different kinds of sonnets which tweak this idea but the basic structure
is 8+6.
o Shakespeare most often did 12+2 (three quatrains and a rhyming couplet) but
often even his sonnets can be viewed as 8+6.
• The octave and the sestet are separated by a changing of the main idea of the
sonnet.
o This could be a total turnaround or a subtle adjustment of attitude but there will
be a change! It is often described as the “problem-solution” structure.
• The basic rhythm of a sonnet is iambic pentameter (10 syllables per line, 5 poetic
feet, unstressed-stressed, da-DUM etc.)
o When a poet deviates from this it is for a poetic reason.
• All sonnets have a regular rhyme scheme.
o Shakespeare’s sonnets follow an ABABCDCDEFEFGG rhyme scheme. There
other types of sonnets that use different variations of similar rhyme schemes.
If we know this, then we know what to look out for when we read a sonnet. If the poem is one
stanza with quite similar length lines then count the lines. If there are 14 lines then it is likely a
sonnet. If it has a regular rhyme scheme and is written in iambic pentameter, it is DEFINITELY
a sonnet! Because the sonnet is so tightly structured and has obvious conventions, examiners
LOVE to ask about the form of this poem in tests and exams…

Glossary:

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 • counsel – to give advice.
• grieve – to feel intense sorrow, particularly associated with loss.
• corruption - a departure from what is pure and correct; also, the decay of a corpse.
• vestige – a trace, mark, or visible sign left behind by something that is gone.

RHYME SCHEME:

The rhyme scheme for a Petrarchan sonnet is typically ABBAABBACDECDE. Rossetti

employs a variation of this rhyme scheme for this sonnet.

This sonnet’s rhyme scheme is ABBAABBACDDECE.

The rhythm is the typical iambic pentameter expected in sonnets.

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Notice the volta at the beginning of the sestet (line 9). Rossetti uses the typical marker of a
word indicating a change in attitude/tone/idea – that word being ‘yet’. This is a signal to the
reader that the ideas developed in the octave are now going to be viewed/presented in an
alternative way in the sestet. To understand the poem, you must grasp the difference in attitude
and ideas between the octave and the sestet.

This poem is called “Remember”. How one should remember is a major theme in the poem
and the central message is built around this idea. Consider the shift in attitude (from line 9) to
be a shift in the way the speaker views the subject. As the speaker presents their ideas they
come to a realisation and that realisation leads to a change in attitude.

The speaker is talking to someone (who do you think it is?). They are describing how they
want to be remembered. Read the poem again and see how they speak about being
remembered in the octave versus how they speak about being remembered in the sestet.

Analysis of Remember

Rossetti wrote ‘Remember’ in 1849 when she was just 19 years old. The structure, content,
and technical expertise on display in this poem are remarkable for a teenager writing in any
era. Rossetti shows a maturity of thought and ability that go far beyond her 19 years. In
particular, Rossetti uses pronouns in an interesting way in this poem.

1. Remember me when I am gone away,

2. Gone far away into the silent land;
The poem begins with an imperative (a command) to the person being addressed:
‘Remember me’. It is followed by an explanation that is a bit obscure: ‘when I am gone
away’. We learn, as the poem unfolds, that this is a reference to death. It is a euphemism

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– a soft, gentle expression for something usually horrible or difficult to talk about.
Notice that the first line contains two personal pronouns, BOTH of them referring to the
speaker. In other words, the first line may be addressed to someone else but it is totally
focussed on the speaker themself. It is, perhaps, an indication of the state of mind of
the speaker at the beginning of the poem. The command/demand to be remembered
could be thought of as self-centred. Line 2 extends the euphemism found in line 1 and
takes the metaphor of travel (to represent death) to a logical extension. The travel (‘gone
away’) has taken the speaker to a (‘far away’) ‘silent land’. This is an effective metaphor
for death as the deceased and those left behind are separated by what must seem to be
a great distance (out of sight, can’t be contacted, etc.). The silence described is a
reference to the impossibility of communication with the dead. One cannot speak to
those who have passed. If we consider that the speaker is addressing the topic of their
death with a loved one, then this is a reasonable manner of expressing the idea of death
in a softer way than directly speaking of it.

3. When you can no more hold me by the hand,

4. Nor I half turn to go yet turning stay.
Lines 3 and 4 continue the conditions attached to the command ‘remember me’. In lines
1 & 2 it is remember me when I am gone away (dead). In lines 3 and 4 it is remember me
when I’m no longer around for you to touch – when you are unable to hold me. Notice
that Rossetti doesn’t say ‘hold my hand’. She frames it as ‘hold ME by the hand’. It is
the act of holding the speaker (the whole person) that will be missed not just the act of
holding a hand. Line 4 refers to the speaker being in the act of leaving but deciding
rather to stay. Once death has separated them, the speaker will no longer be able to
make that decision. It is, perhaps, a feature of the relationship that the speaker appears
to be leaving but constantly stays. It is not a big leap to assume that this is a reference
to the speaker being ill and seemingly on the way out before recovering. The reason
for this interpretation can be found later in the poem. More on that when we get to line
11. Notice the rhyme of lines 1 and 4. ‘Away’ is rhymed with ‘stay’. These two words
indicate opposite ideas: leaving and remaining. This is a neat tying together of two
opposing ideas that indicate the state of mind of the speaker. Coming to terms with the
reality of leaving (dying) the speaker wants to remain in some way. Hence the
instruction to remember. Line 4 ends with a full stop. The structure of the Petrarchan
sonnet has two quatrains making up an octave. Line 4 is the end of the first quatrain.

5. Remember me when no more day by day

6. You tell me of our future that you plann'd:
The second quatrain of the octave begins in the same manner as the first – with the
same instruction. This time it is to ‘remember me’ when you can no longer talk about
our future together on a day-to-day basis. Line 6 is the reason that most people interpret
this as a poem addressed to a lover rather than a family member or friend. The idea of
planning a future together is usually associated with romantic partners. The reference
to ‘our’ future in line 6 cements this idea. Notice that line 6 ends with a colon indicating
that what comes next will be closely linked to (and, perhaps, an explanation of) what
comes before.

7. Only remember me; you understand

8. It will be late to counsel then or pray.

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Line 7 gives us a hint of a development of attitude in the speaker as the poem
progresses. The instruction changes in line 7 to ‘Only remember me’. The placement of
the word ‘only’ before ‘remember’ means that the person being addressed is to do
nothing other than remember. They do not have to perform any physical acts like
putting flowers on a grave or something like that. Line 8 explains that the speaker
knows that after their passing it will be too late do anything that might bring comfort or
affect the outcome. This is the development in attitude. At first it is REMEMBER ME.
YOU MUST REMEMBER ME. Now it becomes a slightly different imperative. Just
remember me because there is nothing else that can be done. The octave ends on a full
stop, a common technique in Petrarchan sonnets. It closes the first part of the poem
and allows the change in attitude from line 9 to start afresh with a new sentence.

9. Yet if you should forget me for a while

10. And afterwards remember, do not grieve:
The volta brings the obvious change and there is an abrupt turnaround. Suddenly, after
begging/commanding/demanding remembrance, the speaker seems to take a more
understanding approach and say that forgetting is also natural. Line 9 explains that the
speaker knows that the loved on may be taking a walk, for example, and, for a little
while, not be actively remembering the deceased speaker (‘if you should forget me for
a while’). Line 10 then brings us back to the idea of remembering which is so strongly
advocated in the octave. However, this time the idea of remembering is associated with
the pain of remembering a loved on. The speaker seems to have realised that memory
can cause pain and they don’t want that for the loved one (‘do not grieve’). Again, there
is a colon (line 10) to indicate a close relationship with what comes before the colon
and what comes after.

11. For if the darkness and corruption leave

12. A vestige of the thoughts that once I had,
Line 11 is the reason that many readers interpret this poem as the words of an ill
(presumably terminally) speaker to a loved one. The words ‘darkness’ and ‘corruption’
are jarring in this line. They are so far removed from the diction of the rest of the poem
that they stand out. The common interpretation is that they are a reference to the
corruption of the body of the speaker – i.e., the disease that is killing the speaker.
Another interpretation is that they are a reference to the corruption of the memory of
the speaker. The darkness may be the sorrow or pain associated with the loss. Line 12
explains what they might leave: ‘a vestige of the thoughts that once I had’. This is a
small trace, a little memory of the speaker in some form and, look back to line 10, the
concern here is that those memories will bring grief and pain. Line 11 begins a
conditional statement: if something happens… This statement will be completed in
lines 13 & 14. Notice the tying together of ‘leave’ and ‘grieve’ through the rhyme
scheme. These two ideas are linked as the ‘leaving’ of one person leads to the ‘grieving’
of the other. Another clever technique used by Rossetti that brings unity to the
concepts conveyed in the poem.

13. Better by far you should forget and smile

14. Than that you should remember and be sad.
Line 13 begins the resolution to the conditional statement begun in line 11. If the
darkness leaves a sad memory of me… (line 11) THEN it is much better for you to forget
and smile (line 13). This is the full development of the attitude of the speaker. After

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insisting upon being remembered in the octave, the final message to the loved on is
that it is actually ok to forget IF FORGETTING WILL MAKE YOU HAPPY! In the end, the
speaker wants the loved one to be happy. If remembering makes them sad (line 14),
then rather forget and be happy (line 13). Compare the use of personal pronouns in the
last two lines to the first line. In the first line it’s ‘me’ and ‘I’ – it is focussed on the self.
In lines 13 and 14 it is ‘you’ and ‘you’. The speaker is now focussed on the loved on
who remains. The realisation seems to have been that the speaker will be gone and it
won’t actually make a difference to them whether they are remembered or not. However,
the loved on, who remains, may be negatively affected by the act of remembering.
Therefore, rather forget if that is going to be best for you. Notice that the sestet ends
with a full stop. The idea is fully conveyed and ends at the end of line 14. Notice the
linking of lines 11 and 13 by the rhyme scheme (‘while’ and ‘smile’). Line 11 introduces
the idea of forgetting for a while and line 13 reinforces this and extends it by saying that
forgetting could actually lead to happiness (‘smile’). The same thing has been done with
lines 12 and 14. Line 12 speaks of lingering thoughts of the deceased and line 14 ends
with the idea of memory leading to sadness. Rossetti has tightly constructed this poem
to link ideas throughout. By ending in this way, the speaker has gone from instructing
the loved on to remember to giving the loved one permission to forget. This places the
decision of how to deal with the loss in the hands of the loved one. They no longer have
to follow the instructions of the deceased (who is not there to guide them) but they can
rather remember or forget as they see fit. This attitude is liberating for the one who is
left behind.

PUNCTUATION

• Full stops only at the end of the two quatrains forming the octave and the sestet. This
gives the poem the expected structure of a Petrarchan sonnet. The first quatrain lays
down an idea. The second quatrain reinforces or develops the idea. The sestet presents
an opposing idea. End punctuation neatly indicates each of these parts of the poem.
• Rossetti uses colons (lines 6 and 10) to indicate the close relationship of the following
lines to what has come before the colons.

What is this poem about?

• It’s about a person speaking of how they wish to be remembered after their
death.

But what is really about?

• It’s really about the way in which we selfishly put ourselves at the centre of
those types of conversations and, therefore, put painful and unreasonable
expectations on the ones we leave behind.
• Rossetti shows immense maturity for a teenager to realise this and express
it.

Words to describe the tone of Sonnet 104:

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The following words can all describe the tone of the poem at various stages. Which
words apply to the octave and which to the sestet?

• Melancholy
• Contemplative
• Hopeful
• Conciliatory
• Selfless
• Nostalgic
• Beseeching/imploring

Contextual questions for Remember

Try these questions on Remember. The poetry questions in a Paper 1 exam will most
likely require you to draw a comparison between two or more poems but we will focus
on each poem individually in these practice questions.

1.1 Comment on the repetition of the title in the poem

What is a writer doing when they repeat something? They are bashing the reader over
the head with it! Do you see it, reader? DO YOU SEE IT NOW? In other words, they want
you to recognise the importance of the repeated word or idea. If you simply write that,
you will not get marks. You need to put that idea in the context of the poem. What about
the title does the poet want you consider when it is repeated in the poem? What is the
central message?

How does the use of pronouns reflect the speaker’s relationship with the person being
1.2
addressed?
Personal pronouns are just that. Personal. By using them what effect is created on our
understanding of the relationship?

1.3 Discuss critically the poet’s use of the sonnet structure to indicate different tones.

This is the question you’ve been waiting for! You know sonnet structure. You understand
the volta. You know how Petrarchan sonnets work. You see this question on the page
and you breathe deeply before answering it in such a way that will leave the marker
absolutely bewildered by your brilliance. Flex a little. Mention that this is a Petrarchan
sonnet. Use the word ‘volta’. Include a reference to the ‘octave’ and ‘sestet’ in your
answer. Don’t forget to refer to specific aspects of this poem in your answer to ensure
that you are not just speaking generally about sonnet structure. Where are the tonal
changes in this poem? How does the sonnet structure support and reinforce these
changes?

To what extent do you think that this is a love poem if references are made to ‘silent
1.4 land’ (line 2) and ‘darkness and corruption’ (line 11)? Refer to the
whole poem in support of your answer.

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In your answer, you need to clearly state whether you think this is a love poem to a large
extent or to a lesser extent. The ‘silent land’ and ‘darkness and corruption’ can be read
as references to death and disease, so the question is asking whether or not those kinds
of things can be included in this poem if it is indeed a love poem – a poem between lovers
and about their relationship. What do you think? Refer to specific aspects of the poem
to support your answer.

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