Dumb boy’s

Book of Oats
~ Vol 2 ~

More conditioning ideas by dumb boy

(that’s me, I’m dumb boy)

1
 Table of contents

Table of contents 2
Why we do conditioning 2
Altering ideas 3
Why so many pullups? I can’t do that many pullups! 4
Mirror Lake 5
Artemis 6
Innerlocitor 7
Deimos 8
Unearth 9
Utopia 10
Subspace Emissary 11
Kombucha 12
Kakarot 13
Valkyrie 14
2099 15
Mithraeum 16
Patrick Special 17
Peridot 18
Phoenix down 19

2
 Why we do conditioning

You can find the first Book of Oats right here:

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1OcFJQb_h9OKCglDn5IF-M15kjRIJGLJ-/view?usp=sharing

This was said in the first volume, but I’ll say it again because it’s important: conditioning is one
of the most valuable tools you have to get big and strong. The work capacity it builds will carry
over into your lifting sessions, allowing you to lift faster and better.

Imagine it takes you 40 minutes to do your bench press work and then your rows. And you
come back next week and superset them, with the same weights; and that takes 35 minutes.
Next week you do the same and it takes 30 minutes, are you not stronger? You lifted the same
amount in 10 minutes less, that’s better workout density - This is the effect conditioning has on
your lifting. If you run an AMRAP based program, you need good conditioning to succeed.
Otherwise you spend weeks building up to a set that you’re too unfit to excel in.

The reason I’m bringing attention to this is because there’s too many guys out there who think
trying some of these ideas will detract from their lifting sessions (as in, programmed lifting
sessions, you can pick conditioning as you see fit). These people need conditioning the most.
Some of these ideas take 10 minutes to complete, if that will mess up a deadlift session
tomorrow, you could be so much better. Give it a try.

Totals are given for each idea, this is because I want you to get a handle on how hard
something is before you try it. If you know how much work 60 squats, 30 pullups, & 80 push ups
are, you can look an the totals of other ideas and get a handle on what weights to pick

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 Altering ideas

You’ll quickly see there are some funny lifts in these ideas, pressing with a trap bar, squatting
with an SSB, heavy use of a chest expander, and neglecting several common lifts.

That's because they were originally written for me. I have some severe spine conditions (they
are genetic, lift on brothers), and I am forced to lift in a certain way.

But this is ok, because you have full permission to alter any idea so you can do it. No trap bar?
Press literally anything. No SSB? Back Squat, zercher, front squat, etc.

Use whichever lifts you can, however there is consideration and synergy with what has been
chosen; try your best to follow the essence of them.

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 Why so many pullups? I can’t do that many pullups!

I know, you want to see the ideas, but let me deviate just once more. There’s a lot of pullups
(pullups, chin ups, neutral grip, any) in these ideas, and a lot of people can’t do them very well.
So here’s some advice.

Conditioning is the perfect place to do pullups, or in fact, any bodyweight exercise you are
struggling with. They require some amount of practice as well as strength, this is why the
grease the groove method is so effective with them. E.g; do a pullup every time you pass
through the door, and your daily total will go up, eventually a single pullup at a time is easy.

Let’s use an example, let’s say your max pullup is just 3 reps, every week you try to add more
and it’s just not happening. Try using conditioning to help you, instead of failing to get the 4th
rep time and again.

Instead imagine you did a 5 minute EMOM of: 1 pullup, 3 push ups, 10 air squats, then a few
days later try 6-8 minutes of it. Then 10, then 15, then go back to 5 and do: 2 pullups, 3 push
ups, 10 air squats. Now you’re doing 10 total pullups in 5 minutes, and perhaps more if you can
handle more than 5 minutes of it. Total pullups will really help in increasing that set of 3 to 4,
and more. You’re now practicing to do pullups, and when you’re tired too.

There's also so many pullups in these ideas because bodyweight exercises (even when they
are weighted) offer a very good stimulus-to-fatigue ratio. They do a lot for you and are easy to
recover from.

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 Mirror Lake

The premise behind dan john’s 2, 3, 5 rep scheme, is that it doesn’t take much rest after a set
of 2 to do a set of 3, and it doesn't take much rest after a set of 5 to do a set of 2. Letting you
rack up rounds of 10 reps easily. I wanted to keep this idea alive including all reps from 1-5. In
fact, you’ll see it a lot in the following ideas.

● An expansion of dan john’s 2,3,5 to use all 1-5 for 15 total reps a round
● The chins/dips will use 3 weights, E.g: 3kg, 6kg, & 9kg
● 2 chins, 2 dips, 3 push ups, 5 goblet squats
● 3 chins, 3 dips, 3 push ups, 5 goblet squats
● 5 chins, 5 dips, 3 push ups, 5 goblet squats
● 1 chin, 1 dip, 3 push ups, 5 goblet squats
● 4 chins, 4 dips, 3 push ups, 5 goblet squats
● Five rounds working up and down the weights, E.g (3kg, 6kg, 9kg, 6kg, 3kg)

● Totals: 75 chins/dips/push ups & 125 goblet squats

I’m a big fan of adding even a small amount to bodyweight exercises. It doesn’t matter if you
have to use: bodyweight, 1kg, & 2kg as your 3 weights, make it happen. I just hold a dumbbell
between my legs for the chins & dips for speed. You’ll run through the whole circuit listed above
before you move onto your next weight, and start again with 2 chins, 2 dips, 3 push ups, 5
goblet squats.

Here’s a variation for the squat, I call it M.T - to use up less equipment, I do chins off the same
rack (pullups off dip handles set to the highest rung actually), and press a pair of dumbbells.

● 4 rounds, add 2.5kg to the squats each round:

● 2 squats 2 chins 3 press 5 band pullaparts
● 3 squats 3 chins 3 press 5 band pullaparts
● 5 squats 5 chins 3 press 5 band pullaparts
● 1 squat 1 chin 3 press 5 band pullaparts
● 4 squats 4 chins 3 press 5 band pullaparts

● Totals: 60 squats/chins/press, & 100 pullaparts

If the chins are slowing you down too much, try sets of 2 for 40 total reps.

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 Artemis

Bored of the mirror lake rep scheme yet? Good. This one centers around Klokov press, google
it. It’s a snatch grip behind the neck press. This is good because it's a disadvantaged lift, you
can get a lot out of pretty low weights, so you get good stimulus but it doesnt wear you down.

● Klokov press (2, 3, 5, 1, 4)

● 5 round pyramid (E,g; 30kg, 32.5kg, 35kg, 32.5kg, 30kg)
○ Press x 2, 8 vertical pullaparts, 5 goblet squats
○ Press x 3, 3 pullups, 5 goblet squats
○ Press x 5, 8 vertical pullaparts, 5 goblet squats
○ Press x 1, 3 pullups, 5 goblet squats
○ Press x 4, 8 vertical pullaparts, 5 goblet squats

● Totals: 75 Klokov press/goblet squats, 120 pullaparts, 30 pullups

● Can use just vertical pullaparts (sets of 5 - 125 total) or just pullups (sets of 2 - 50 total)

Vertical pullaparts is a chest expander exercise, I think they are fantastic, but very few people
have a chest expander. I can at least vouch for Robert Baraban’s one. If you have to, you can
use band pullaparts, try doing them vertically.

You will add 2.5kg to the bar each round, then work back down. It says a 5 round pyramid, but
I’ve used this many times as a 3 round pyramid also for a faster option.

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 Innerlocitor

This one is really simple, and a good lower stress 10 minute option to tack onto the end of a
lifting session. This is mostly here to demonstrate how to easily run chins, dips, inverted rows, &
push ups out of the same rack, because it features a lot in these ideas:

● 1 pullup, 2 dips, 3 inverted rows, 4 push ups, 5 hindu squats

● Set a 10 min timer, finish the round you’re on when it goes off

Here’s a demonstration, if the inverted rows are too easy for you, elevate your feet on
something:

https://i.imgur.com/039sg3a.mp4

With the same setup you can do Drearburh also:

● Weight vest on the whole time

● rows are inverted off the dip handles
● 2 chins / 4 squats, 2 dips / 4 squats 2 rows / 4 squats, 2 push ups / 4 squats
● Set a timer and go until it goes off

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 Deimos

This one can either be easy or hard depending on how fast you move and how hard you push
your top set, because you’re gonna have to match whatever it ends up being with dips.

● Sets of chins, start at 1 and add a rep each set, hit a top set and work your way back
down
● After each set of chins do 5 push ups and 5 goblet squats
● Repeat with dips (match number you got for chins), 5 inverted rows, 5 goblet squats

● E.g; a top set of 7 gives: 49 chins/dips, 65 push ups/rows, 130 goblet squats

You can start with dips if you’d like. You should start with whichever movement you’re weaker in,
as then you can always match the reps afterwards.

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 Unearth

Been skipping your bicep work? Try this out. Ever since Dan John listed slow eccentric power
curls as a bicep builder, I've wanted to do something with them. The first time I tried this I used a
14.5kg vest & 40kg bar for 20 rounds, and it took 30 minutes.

● Weight vest can be worn

● Rack power curls in sets of 3
● Eccentric for the power curl is slow
● Do for 10 to 20 rounds
● Odd: power clean x3, chins x 3, overhead press x 3, squat x 15
● Even: power clean x3, inverted row x 3, push ups x 3, squat x 15

● Totals for 10 rounds: 30 power curls, 15 pullups/rows/press/push ups, & 150 squats

Note: a power curl is a power clean with a curl grip, it is not a hip assisted bicep curl. You
should not be curling the weight up, you clean it up, and slowly curl it down:

https://i.imgur.com/DIA4uG9.mp4

I do the power curls out of the rack, this is because I’m not allowed to pull from the floor
anymore. But the focus here is the slow eccentric, so do it from whatever height you want to;
floor, hang, rack/blocks.

If you’re not wearing a vest, you may want to grab a dumbbell or kettlebell for those squats.

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 Utopia

The best way to describe Utopia is sustainable - it’s always so easy to start another round, often
the only thing stopping me is that I like to keep conditioning ideas under 30 minutes. I’ve done
this for 8 rounds before, (which is 80 weighted chins) and I could have kept going.

● Rounds of (5, 3, 2) chins & (3, 2, 1) dips with 3 weights

● 5 chins (3kg), 3 dips (3kg), 5 push ups, 8 goblet squats
● 3 chins (6kg), 2 dips (6kg), 5 push ups, 8 goblet squats
● 2 chins (9kg), 1 dip (9kg), 5 push ups, 8 goblet squats
● You can use swings instead of squats if you like, sets of 10

● Totals per round: 10 chins, 6 dips, 15 push ups, 24 squats

● 5 rounds is 50 chins, 30 dips, 75 push ups, 120 squats

The weights listed are just what I use, use what’s right for you. Usually in conditioning we pick
weights that are pretty low compared to our training 1 rep maxes. But when it comes to
weighted pullups & dips you seem to be able to go pretty close to your 1RM for low reps and still
be fine for your training sessions. But, when it comes to Utopia - I like to keep the weight low
and chase rounds in the 25-30 minute range instead.

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 Subspace Emissary

This isn’t as daunting to understand as it looks, I like to keep some light ankle weights on for the
pullups & use dumbbells for the press to use up less space/equipment.

● Ladder of 1 - 10 squats or press, with sets of 2 inbetween

● 1, 2, 2, 2, 3, 2, 4, 2, 5, 2, 6, 2, 7, 2, 8, 2, 9, 2, 10, 2 - total of 75 reps
○ Squat x 1, 2 push ups, 1 press, 2 pullups
○ Squat x 2, 2 push ups, 2 press, 2 pullups
○ Squat x 2, 2 push ups, 2 press, 2 pullups
○ Squat x 2, 2 push ups, 2 press, 2 pullups
○ Squat x 3, 2 push ups, 3 press, 2 pullups
○ Squat x 2, 2 push ups, 2 press, 2 pullups
○ And so on up to 10

● Total of 20 sets, 75 squat/press, 40 push ups/pullups

You can run this with just one primary & secondary lift if you like, E.g; squats & pullups. But the
full version is very manageable. Sometimes I boost the push ups/pullups to sets of 4.

I often run this with backpress as the press option (a chest expander move), but you really can
pick anything at all to press overhead.

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 Kombucha

This is one of my favourite conditioning templates to run. Weight vest training just feels good to
do and doesn’t grind you down.

● Weight vest worn whole time

● Chins use 3 weights, E.g; vest, vest +3kg, vest +6kg
● 3 chins (vest), 3 push ups, 5 backpress, 10 squats
● 5 inverted rows, 3 push ups, 5 backpress, 10 squats
● 2 chins (+3kg), 3 push ups, 5 backpress, 10 squats
● 5 inverted rows, 3 push ups, 5 backpress, 10 squats
● 1 chins (+6kg), 3 push ups, 5 backpress, 10 squats

● 5 rounds: 30 chins, 50 rows, 75 push ups, 125 backpress, 250 squats

Another option with this is to do doubles for the chins, which doubles to the top weight chins to
a grand total of 10, exciting. You can play with the number of rounds and 3, 2, 1 vs doubles to
progress this without needing to alter the vest or weights you’re using.

Backpress is a chest expander move, if you don't have one then pick a vertical press instead.

I typically run this for 5 rounds, which takes around 25-30 minutes. For something faster you
can try Kom instead:

● Faster version of Kombucha, hit top set then reverse:

● 3 chins (vest), 3 push ups, 5 backpress, 10 squats
● 5 inverted rows, 3 push ups, 5 backpress, 10 squats
● 2 chins (+3kg), 3 push ups, 5 backpress, 10 squats
● 5 inverted rows, 3 push ups, 5 backpress, 10 squats
● 1 chins (+6kg), 3 push ups, 5 backpress, 10 squats
● 5 inverted rows, 3 push ups, 5 backpress, 10 squats
● 2 chins (+3kg), 3 push ups, 5 backpress, 10 squats
● 5 inverted rows, 3 push ups, 5 backpress, 10 squats
● 3 chins (vest), 3 push ups, 5 backpress, 10 squats

● Totals: 11 chins, 20 rows, 27 push ups, 45 backpress, 90 squats

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 Kakarot

Kakarot looks simple, because it is. But that doesn't mean it’s easy. For me an idea with a squat,
a pullup, and an overhead press seem to yield the biggest hit to the system. It hits everything,
and we have level changes in the form of push ups to raise the heart rate also.

● SSB Squat ladder starting at 1, add one rep each set

● After each set do: 3 pullups, 4 press, 5 push ups
● Set a 25 min timer, and keep going until it goes off
● Finish the round you’re on when the timer goes off

If you don’t have an SSB use zerchers or front squats. It helps to have a front loaded squat for
this as it enforces less weight, and the reps can get relatively high in this. My best with a 25
minute timer is a top set of 16 reps, which is a total of 136 squats, 48 pullups, 64 presses, & 80
push ups.

I like to wear ankle weights during this to make the pullups harder, but it’s only a total of 6kg,
and completely optional.

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 Valkyrie

I have to overhead press with a trap bar, you can use whatever you’d like. However, if you have
access to a trap bar - try it. It has an interesting ROM, and just like the Klokov press it’s an
awkward lift. You can get more out of less weight again, especially if you’re tall or have long
arms.

● Rounds of a decently heavy trap bar press single, and alternate reps for pullups/dips
● Weight vest is worn the whole time
● Odd: 1 press, 2 pullups, 3 dips, 5 goblet squats
● Even: 1 press, 3 pullups, 2 dips, 5 goblet squats
● Go for 20 rounds

● Totals: 20 press, 50 weighted pullups/dips, 100 goblet squats

Personally I wouldn't want to barbell overhead press with a weight vest on, but it works very
smoothly within a trap bar. If you do find yourself straying from the warm light of god and
running this without a weight vest on, perhaps boost those goblet squats to sets of 10.

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 2099

The lifts for this one are specifically chosen to hit your traps/yoke area. So I suggest you pick a
front loaded squat, a dumbbell overhead press (so you have to stabilize), and try to get ahold of
a chest expander. If not, I have a substitute.

● Squats are SSB, 1-10, 2-9 for 99 reps/18 sets (1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9)

● Ankle weights worn the whole time
● Vertical pullaparts are done with a chest expander
● 1-10: squat, pullup x 3, vertical pullaparts x 10
● 2-9: squat, pullup x 3, press x 5
● Total: 99 squats, 54 weighted pullups, 100 vertical pullaparts, 40 press
● Can also swap ankle weights for a vest, drop pullups to 2 (36 total) & replace press with
push ups

Vertical pullaparts are a really good way to build your traps/rear delts without loading your
spine, a maxed out expander weighs less than 4kg. But if you don’t have one, you could replace
it with dumbbell shrugs x 10, and for simplicity use the same ones you plan on pressing later
on if you care about taking up equipment.

It says you have to wear ankle weights but that's mostly for me, it only comes into play with the
pullups. So do them bodyweight, or hold a dumbbell with your legs or something.

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 Mithraeum

This one looks worse than it is, in fact the hardest part is keeping track of what set you’re on.
The first time I tested this I used a 12.5 kg vest & 60-80 kg trap bar deadlifts, and it only took 16
minutes. So I tried squats immediately after (same vest & 50-70 kg squats) and that only took
16 minutes too.

● Weight vest is worn the whole time

● 19 total sets of SSB squats or trap bar deadlifts (5x5, 4x4, 3x3, 2x2, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5) with 3
push ups & 2 chins after each set
● 5kg is added to the bar each round until you hit the single, so a 20kg difference from
start/end weight (you can also half that if you like)
● 5 squats, 3 push ups, 2 chins, x5 (start weight)
● 4 squats, 3 push ups, 2 chins, x4 (add 5kg)
● 3 squats, 3 push ups, 2 chins, x3 (add 5kg)
● 2 squats, 3 push ups, 2 chins, x2 (add 5kg)
● 1 squat, 3 push ups, 2 chins, x1 (add 5 kg - end weight)
● 2 squats, 3 push ups, 2 chins, x1 (end weight)
● 3 squats, 3 push ups, 2 chins, x1 (end weight)
● 4 squats, 3 push ups, 2 chins, x1 (end weight)
● 5 squats, 3 push ups, 2 chins, x1 (end weight)

● Totals: 69 SSB squats or trap bar deadlifts, 57 push ups, 38 chins

This time I do recommend you only use a SSB or trap bar with the vest on. I don’t use this one
very often but my advice is, start with a manageable weight and push for time.

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 Patrick Special

Don't forget to do your carries, this is a quick and effective thing to do if you have a spare 5-15
minutes. It was quickly thrown together for Patrick, who has demonstrated it down below if you
have any trouble understanding how I’ve tried to lay it out.

● Weight vest on the whole time

● Put a sandbag at the end of your carrying space (“end position”)
● Rounds of:
○ Do 3-5 push ups (start position)
○ Run to sandbag
○ Carry sandbag to start position (bear hug grip)
○ Do 5 squats with the sandbag
○ Carry sandbag to end position
○ Run to start position

I used a 12.5kg vest and a 75lb sandbag when I tried this, and let me tell you, that “run to
sandbag” quickly becomes “walk sadly full of regret to sandbag”.

I know it says to use a sandbag but if you’re on break at your veterinarian job and all you have
is a bag of kitty litter, it still works:

https://i.imgur.com/1zUHUdD.mp4

Note: this video is not sped up, Patrick really is that fast.

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 Peridot

Just like Kakarot, this one is simple but can be grueling. The start and finish are dense with
pullups and overhead pressing, and the middle is heavy on squats.

● Squat ladder starting at 1 rep, add a rep each set to 10 and work back down
● After each squat set (and one round before for an even 20 sets) do 3 pullups & 4 press
● Totals: 100 squats, 60 pullups, 80 press

I’m a fan of anything that uses ladders because it minimizes how much you need to warm up as
you kick off peridot with just 1 squat (after you do the 3 pullups & 4 press).

If you’re interested in a more even spread of reps for the squats you can try the Atma rep
scheme. It’s the same 100 reps but shuffled around differently, this is how I usually use Atma:

● reps are just 1 to 10 back down to 1 but shuffled around into descending evens &
ascending odds
● Push ups 10-8-6-4-2-1-3-5-7-9-8-6-4-2-1-3-5-7-9 and 5 goblet squats after each set

● Totals: 100 push ups, 95 goblet squats

I like to use Atma when I want a 10 minute idea that only requires 1 kettlebell.

19
 Phoenix down

This is a quick 15 minute max idea I like to use on non-training days just to get some movement
in & break up the sitting.

● 15 down push ups (15-14-13-etc)

● Match each set of push ups with a pull, then do 5 goblet squats
● 15 - 11: push ups, vertical pullaparts, 5 goblet squats
● 10 - 6: push ups, inverted rows, 5 goblet squats
● 5 - 1: push ups, chins, 5 goblet squats

● Totals: 120 push ups, 65 pullaparts, 40 rows, 15 chins, 75 goblets

● If you add the pull instead of replace it your totals are 120 push ups/pullaparts, 55 rows,
15 chins

No extra weight for the inverted rows or chins/pullups for this one, it’s meant to be very low
stress. I don’t even mind you doing air squats or hindu squats for the goblets. Again, if you have
no expander just do band pullaparts in their place.

20