Coping Skills

Anger
Be Aware of Triggers
Anger triggers are the things that set you off. Knowing your triggers, and being cautious around
them, will reduce the likelihood of your anger getting out of control.

How to use triggers to your advantage:

Create a list of your triggers and review them daily. Reviewing your triggers will keep them
fresh in your mind, increasing the likelihood you notice them before they become a problem.

Oftentimes, the best way to deal with a trigger is to avoid it. This might mean making
changes to your lifestyle, relationships, or daily routine.

Because it isn’t always possible to avoid triggers, have a plan when you must face them. For
example, avoid touchy conversations when you are tired, hungry, or upset.

Practice Deep Breathing

Deep breathing is a simple technique that’s excellent for managing emotions. Not only is deep
breathing effective, it’s also discreet and easy to use at any time or place.

Sit comfortably and place one hand on your abdomen. Breathe in through your nose, deeply
enough that the hand on your abdomen rises. Hold the air in your lungs, and then exhale slowly
through your mouth, with your lips puckered as if you are blowing through a straw. The secret is
to go slow: Time the inhalation (4s), pause (4s), and exhalation (6s). Practice for 3 to 5 minutes.

Keep an Anger Log

Following an episode of anger, take a few moments to record your experience. This practice will help
you identify patterns, warning signs, and triggers, while also helping you organize thoughts and work
through problems.

What was happening before the anger episode? Describe how you were feeling, and what
was on your mind. Were you hungry, tired, or stressed?

Describe the facts of what happened. What events triggered your anger? How did you react,
and did your reaction change as the event continued to unfold?

What were your thoughts and feelings during the anger episode? Looking back, do you see
anything differently than when you were in the heat of the moment?

© 2018 Therapist Aid LLC 1 Provided by TherapistAid.com

 Coping Skills
Anger
Use Diversions
The goal of diversions is to buy yourself time. If you can distract yourself for just 30 minutes, you’ll
have a better chance of dealing with your anger in a healthy way. Remember, you can always return
to the source of your anger later—you’re just setting the problem aside for now.

go for a walk read a book play a sport listen to music

watch a movie practice a hobby go for a run clean or organize

do yard work draw or paint do a craft cook or bake

play a game go for a bicycle ride write or journal take a long bath

play an instrument call a friend lift weights go swimming

go hiking in nature take photographs play with a pet rearrange a room

Take a Time-out
Time-outs are a powerful tool for relationships where anger-fueled disagreements are causing
problems. When someone calls a time-out, both individuals agree to walk away from the problem,
and return once you have both had an opportunity to cool down.

How to use time-outs effectively:

With your partner, plan exactly how time-outs will work. Everyone should understand the
rationale behind time-outs (an opportunity to cool down—not to avoid a problem).

What will you both do during time-outs? Plan activities that are in different rooms or
different places. The list of diversions from above is a good place to begin.

Plan to return to the problem in 30 minutes to an hour. Important problems shouldn’t be

ignored forever, but nothing good will come from an explosive argument.

Know Your Warning Signs

Anger warning signs are the clues your body gives you that your anger is starting to grow. When you
learn to spot your warning signs, you can begin to address your anger while it’s still weak.

sweating can’t get past problem feel hot / turn red clenched fists

headaches becoming argumentative raised voice using verbal insults

pacing aggressive body language feel sick to stomach go quiet / “shut down”

© 2018 Therapist Aid LLC 2 Provided by TherapistAid.com

 HOW ANGER AFFECTS YOUR
BRAIN AND BODY: PART 13
HOW STRESS HORMONES CAN IMPACT YOUR BODY
To find out where these stress hormones come from, check out Part 1.
And for more on what they are up to in your brain, check out Part 2.

Anger causes the release of stress hormones like

cortisol, adrenaline, and noradrenaline.

CORTISOL ADRENALINE NOR-

ADRENALINE

These hormones give your body bursts of energy so you can cope with negative
situations accordingly. However, too much of these hormones or repeated exposure
to these hormones can begin to negatively impact important parts of your body.

Increased
More frequent
pressure inside
headaches
your eyes
& migraines

Vision issues
like tunnel vision,
sensitivity to light,
or blurry vision

Decreased
thyroid
function

Feelings of
dry mouth

www.nicabm.com
© 2018 The National Institute for the Clinical Application of Behavioral Medicine
 HOW ANGER AFFECTS YOUR
BRAIN AND BODY: PART 13

Decreased
blood ow Increased
in digestive • heart rate
system • blood pressure
• blood glucose level
• blood fatty
acid level
Slow
metabolism

Increased
likelihood of
stroke and
heart attack

Lowered
bone
density

zz

Increase Increase in Decreased

incidents of number of number of
cancer virus infected natural killer
cells cells

Even after the feeling of anger passes, its impact lingers in your body much longer. And the more
often you get angry, the more these hormones can get to work in your body. That’s why it is
important to recognize when you’re angry and take steps to calm this powerful emotion.

www.nicabm.com
© 2018 The National Institute for the Clinical Application of Behavioral Medicine
In challenging times, you may find that you have little patience with other people or get upset over
minor things. Anger and frustration are complicated emotions that often stem from other feelings,
like disappointment, fear, and stress. Taking some extra steps to decrease your overall tension can
prevent your feelings (and the reactions that they cause) from spiraling out of control.
Of people who took an

Tips for coping anxiety screen at

mhascreening.org in 2020,
71% felt easily annoyed or
irritable at least half of the
Pause before reacting. When you feel yourself getting mad, take a moment to time or nearly every day.1
notice what you’re thinking, then take a few deep breaths or count to ten in your
head. By giving yourself even just a few seconds before reacting, you can put Of people who took a
some emotional distance between you and whatever is upsetting you – and you bipolar screen at
might even realize that you’re actually tense because of something else.
mhascreening.org in 2020,
Change your surroundings. Anger can make you feel trapped. Whether you’re 82% reported being so
mad at someone in the same room as you or just angry at the world, sometimes irritable that they shouted
physically relocating yourself can help you start to calm down. Go to another at people or started fights
room or step outside for a few minutes of fresh air to help disrupt the track that or arguments.2
your mind is on.
One poll found that 91% of
Get it all out. Keeping your feelings bottled up never works, so allow yourself respondents said that they
time to be angry and complain. As long as you don’t focus on it for too long, feel people are more likely
venting can be a healthy outlet for your anger. You can open up to a trusted to express their anger on
friend or write it all down in a journal. Sometimes it feels better to pretend to talk social media than they are
directly to the person (or situation) that you’re angry at – pick an empty chair, face-to-face.3
pretend they’re sitting in it, and say what you need to get off your chest.
Release built up energy. Anger is a high-energy emotion, and we store that
energy and tension physically in our bodies. Exercise is a great way to get rid of
extra energy and can improve your mood. Some people find grounding Taking a mental health
exercises (like meditation or deep breathing) helpful to calm intense feelings,
while others prefer more high impact activities like running or weightlifting. screen is one way to work
Think about what you usually do to decompress, like taking a hot shower or on your mental health.
blasting your favorite music and use the tools that you know work for you.
Visit mhascreening.org to
Get organized. When things around you feel chaotic, it’s often a lot easier to get
frustrated and snap at people. Dedicate a few minutes each day to tidying, check your symptoms.
planning, or reorganizing. Implementing a routine can also help you feel more
on top of things by adding structure and certainty to your daily life.

Eliminate stressors if possible. Sometimes there’s no way to completely get rid

of a big problem, but there’s often more than just one issue contributing to your
frustration. Things like an overwhelming workload or unhealthy relationship can
make you feel on edge. Pay attention to how and why you’re feeling stressed
and see if you can make small changes to improve a challenging situation to
make it less burdensome.
Manage your expectations. Negative feelings often stem from people or
situations not meeting your standards or assumptions. It’s frustrating to feel let
down but recognize that you can’t fully predict anyone else’s behavior or how It’s free, confidential, and anonymous.
situations will play out. Shift your mental framework so that you aren’t setting
yourself up for disappointment. Once you have your results, MHA will
give you information and resources to
Don’t be afraid to ask for help. If you’re working to cope with your anger but help you start to feel better.
feel like you can’t get it under control, it’s time to get some extra support. Anger
can fester and become explosive if not resolved. A number of mental health
conditions can manifest as anger, so this may actually be a sign of depression or
anxiety – treating an underlying condition can help heal your anger as well.

Sources
1Proprietary data. MHAScreening.org. 2020.
2Ibid.
3IBM Watson Health-NPR Health Poll. November 1-14, 2018. https://www.ibm.com/downloads/cas/2YQ8NLD5