Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Caples, John.
Tested advertising methods / John Caples. — 5th ed., rev.
and enl. / revised by Fred E. Hahn, p. cm.
Includes index.
ISBN 0-13-244609-X (cloth)
1. Advertising. I. Title.
HF5823.C18 1997 96-47752
659.13'2—-dc21 CIP

© 1997 by Prentice-Hall, Inc.

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 CONTENTS

Illustrations......................................................................................... vii

Preface.................................................................................... ix

Foreword to the Fourth Edition by David Ogilvy .... xiii

Introduction to the Fifth Edition by

Gordon White.......................................................................... xv
Acknowledgments............................................................................... xxi

1 The New Advertising Strategy............................................................ l

2 The Most Important Part of an Advertisement...................................13

3 Headlines That Attract the Most Readers..............................22

4 Right and Wrong Methods of Writing Headlines ... 29

5 Thirty-Five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines

and Direct Mail Teasers...................................................................... 46

6 Finding the Right Appeal....................................................................70

7 Tested Advertising Versus Untested Advertising................................84

8 How to Put Enthusiasm into Advertising Copy......................94

9 How to Write the First Paragraph......................................................102

10 Right and Wrong Methods of Writing Copy.............................115

11 Twenty Ways to Increase Selling Power of Copy..................................133

12 How to Avoid Special Problems in Copywriting......................159

13 Thirty-two Ways to Get More Inquiries from Your Advertising............169

V
 14 How to Appeal to a Mass-Market Audience...........................
Contents 185

15 Layouts and Illustrations That Attract the

Most Readers.......................................................................... l99

16 How to Make Small Ads Pay................................................... 216

17 Ten Brain Teasers................................................................... 224

18 Seventeen Ways to Test Your Advertising.............................. 235

Index....................................................................................... 271
CAPLES INTERNATIONAL AWARD TROPHY....................................FRONTISPIECE

The Caples Ad That Started a New School of Advertising. . xvii

Six Decades Young and Still Going Strong (S & S Mills) ... xix

Eye-opening Blind Response (Evanston Women's Hospital) .. 6

Doing Everything Right! (Select Comfort)........................................ 10

Moving Your 4/wd Out of the Pack (Land Rover).............................. 16

What's in a [Newspaper] Name? (Fabrikant).................................... 32

Emphatically CAPS! (Toyota)............................................................. 41

The Most Valuable List of All (Franklin Mint)................................... 44

The Only Thing Better Than Everything (United Airlines) .. 49

Make Eight Words Do the Work of Eight Hundred (Dayton's,
Marshall Field's, Hudson’s)............................................................... 53
Relationship Marketing for Success (Carnation).............................. 56

Just the Facts, But Make It Interesting (Lands' End)........................ 58

Make an Offer They Can't Refuse (Chemical Bank).......................... 65

To Tell the Truth (Smith Barney)....................................................... 72

Yes You Can! (MCI)...................... 90

If You Can Write a Better Headline (Original Pet
Drink)................................................................................................. 91
Just So They Spell the Name Right! (Helmsley Hotels)..................... 103
The Power of the Written Word ... by Four to Ones
(Andersen Consulting)....................................................................... 108
An Ad That Ran for Seven Years (Alexander Hamilton
Institute)............................................................................................ 118
 The Truth ... the Whole Truth (Bell Atlantic)..................................... 120
Contents
vii
"ADVERTISING" TO THINK ABOUT ... AND WITH
(American Federation of Teachers)................................................... l25

KISS FOR SUCCESS (Lenox).................................... 135

How to Use a One-word Sales Talk (Guess?, Inc.)............................. 144

Six Questions in Search of an Answer (Jaguar)................................. 150

Not Your Everyday Diamond Jubilee (Grizzard)................................ 152

How to Make Small-space Promotions Work Harder
( Foley-Belsaw).................................................................................. 171
Sixteen Times Better Than a News-style Page (Sandoz)................... 182
Turning on the Off-season (Evans).................................................... 206
One of the All-time Greats (International. Correspondence
Schools)............................................................................................. 207
A Public Voice for a Public Corporation (Mobil)................................ 211

Written by the World's Highest-paid Copywriter (Tecla) ... 214

Being Different Isn't Enough, But It Can Help

(Canyon Ranch)................................................................................. 236

A Gifted Mailing (Pitney Bowes)........................................................ 242

Creating a Database That's More Than Skin Deep

(Smith Kline Beecham Oxyn Brand).................................................. 246
PREFACE

When I was asked to prepare a new edition of John Caples'

Tested Advertising Methods, I did what I am certain he would
have done. I read the book before giving an answer. It was an
eye-opener. Here was the only copywriter who deserves to be
called a genius and judging by his book, I knew everything he
did!
It took very little time for the euphoria to subside and the
truth to sink in. Of course I knew everything he'd put into his
book. He had taught it to me. He had shared his hard-won
insights with all those who were willing to learn from him and it
was from their books and articles, seminars and conversations, I
had learned during the past 35 years. I had finally discovered
where so much of my own success as a copywriter had
originated. I owe him my long belated thanks. I hope Contents
this edition
conveys them.
John Caples became one of America's most famous
copywriters by combining immense natural gifts with the
determination to learn why successful ads worked and
unsuccessful ads failed. His three-step systems for advertising
creativity and advertising success revolutionized the way much
advertising was written, designed, and tested. They were fine-
tuned by him throughout his long working life and shared with us
in many articles and books, especially in his four revisions of
Tested Advertising Methods, which this fifth edition is proud to
continue.

CAPLES' THREE-STEP APPROACH TO CREATIVITY

1. Capture the prospect's attention. Nothing happens unless

something in your ad, your mailing, or your commercial
makes the prospect stop long enough to pay attention to
what you say next.
2. Maintain the prospect's interest. Keep the ad, mailing, or
commercial focused on the prospect, on what he or she will
get out of using your product or service.
3. Move the prospect to favorable action. Unless enough
"prospects" are transformed into "customers," your ad has
failed, no matter
X PREFACE

how creative. That's why you don't stop with A/I/A (Attention,
Interest/Action), but continue right on with testing.

CAPLES' THREE-STEP APPROACH TO TESTING

1. Accept nothing as true about what works best in
advertising until it has been objectively—what Caples
called "scientifically"—tested.
2. Build upon everything you learn from testing to create an
ever- stronger system that you return to with each new
project. (Even a slow learner should not have to invent
the wheel more than twice.)
3. Treat every ad as an ongoing test of what has been learned
before. When something new works better—or something
old stops working—be ready to admit you were wrong
about what you thought you "knew." But don't just accept
it. Find out why and apply it the next time.
Or to put it the way Caples taught us:
■ Include in every ad a way to learn (quantify) the exact
results of each promotion.
■ But don't just include it. Take the time and effort to
actually learn it!
■ Base your future writing and design for the same
product or service on what you learn.
A third way of putting this is the LALALAL . .. rule:
Learn/Adapt/Leam/Adapt/Leam/Adapt/Leam ...
ABOUT "SCIENTIFIC" ADVERTISING
John Caples spent his long life learning more than anyone else
had known about how to make advertising successful through
"scientific" testing. We must all be grateful that he not only
did, but also shared it with us.

The Direct Mail Revolution. The consumer direct-by-mail

magazine advertising in which Caples found success and fame
has changed little in the past 50 years. Today, the products
sold are largely collectibles, clothing, health and beauty aids,
self-help books, and audio and video cassettes, and, of course,
everything electronic. Though many newspapers and
magazines carry some direct-by-mail advertising, compara-
X PREFACE

tively few specialize in this type of promotion. But those that

do—Parade
PREFACE i

(a newspaper insert), TV Guide, and Readers Digest among

others—are some of the largest circulation publications we
have.
What has changed is the transformation of "direct-by-
mail" and "direct mail" into Data-based Direct Response
Selling . . . next to computer electronics, the fastest growing
nonarmament industry of the past 20 years. Although many
newspaper and magazine advertisers still ignore John Caples'
principles of scientific advertising, the data-based community
has boomed, building upon and practicing what he preached.
Beginning in the 1970s, there has been an explosion of
direct response selling. Practically every major "regular"
agency—primarily because of client demand—has established
a direct-response division, and smaller direct-response
agencies, in-house direct response advertising departments,
and one-person do-it-yourselfers now number in the
thousands. The "scientific advertising" revolution may not
have come quite the way Caples expected, but the results are
everything he could have hoped for . . . and more!
Nothing in this new edition departs from the basic
techniques and principles he taught. They are as true today as
when he first shared them. Equally true are the insights in the
quotations at the end of each chapter. The quotations were
selected by Caples and have not been changed by the editor.
There are, however, a number of additions and changes that
make his book even more valuable for today:

WHAT'S NEW IN THIS EDITION

■ Wider application. Much of Caples' discussions assumed
the resources of a major agency. But his insights can be
applied equally well by smaller advertising departments
or one-person do-it- yourselfers. These applications have
been added without further comment.
■ More varied illustrations. In addition to outstanding
newspaper and magazine ads from the 1990s, this edition
includes current tested direct mail and multimedia
campaigns that show the validity of Caples' "scientific"
approach to all advertising.
■ Terminology and nomenclature. Caples wrote to persuade
advertising professionals to his scientific approach. He
used their—and his—terminology without further
ii PREFACE

explanations. To make this edition more accessible to

beginners, trade terms now are defined immediately, in
context, the first time used.
■ Case histories. Hundreds of case histories are updated or
replaced to show contemporary usage and application,
such as no longer assuming that all women are
"housewives" or an oil change costs $3.20.
■ The story behind the man behind history's most famous ad.
Gordon White, John Caples' biographer, friend, and fellow
BBDO worker, tells how an Annapolis graduate became
America's most famous copywriter just one year out of the
Academy.

WHERE SCIENTIFIC ADVERTISING STANDS TODAY

The approach to "scientific" advertising that John Caples

preached and practiced for half a century has largely been
accepted. But like every other art and science, it must be
retaught to every new practitioner.
Gordon White, author of the Introduction to this fifth
edition, deserves the final word. Says White:
"Tested Advertising Methods is so clear, so complete, and so
easy to follow, that if a creature from outer space came to
Earth and read it, that visitor could produce excellent
advertising. That hardly leaves any excuse for our not doing
the same."

Fred E. Hahn
November 15,1996
In this book John Caples writes, "I have seen one
advertisement sell 19- 1/2 times as much goods as another."
This statement dramatizes the gigantic difference between
good advertisements and bad ones. You will increase your
chances of writing good ones if you read this book, and
commit its conclusions to memory
An earlier edition taught me most of what I know about
writing advertisements. For example:
1. The key to success (maximum sales per dollar) lies in
perpetual testing of all the variables.
iii PREFACE

2. What you say is more important than how you say it.
3. The headline is the most important element in most
advertisements.
4. The most effective headlines appeal to the reader's self-
interest or give news.
5. Long headlines that say something are more effective than
short headlines that say nothing.
6. Specifics are more believable than generalities.
7. Long copy sells more than short copy.
These discoveries, and dozens like them, have been made
by John Caples in the course of his long and distinguished
career as a writer of mail-order advertising. He has been able
to measure the results of every advertisement he has ever
written.
The average manufacturer, who sells through a complex
system of distribution, is unable to do this. He cannot isolate
the results of individual advertisements from the other factors
in his marketing mix. He is forced to fly blind.
Experience has convinced me that the factors that work
in mailorder advertising work equally well in all advertising.
But the vast
majority of people who work in agencies, and almost all their
clients, have never heard of these factors. That is why they
skid hopelessly about on the greasy surface of irrelevant
brilliance. They waste millions on bad advertising, when good
advertising could be selling 191/2 times as much.
John Caples is the only graduate of the Naval Academy at
Annapolis I have encountered in the advertising business.
Before he became a copywriter, he was an engineer with the
New York Telephone Company. These disciplines predisposed
him to the analytical methods that have made him such an
effective advertising man. He has no theories; only facts.
His methods are empirical and pragmatic. He is also
highly creative. He has written scores of remarkable
advertisements. Every anthology of famous advertisements
includes his classic for the U.S. School of Music, with the
headline "They Laughed When I Sat Down at the Piano. But
When I Started to Play!—"
In short, John Caples is a very rare bird. He is not only an
iv PREFACE

indomitable analyzer and teacher of advertising, he is also a

first-rate copywriter—one of the most effective there has ever
been.
Most of the other great copywriters—including Raymond
Rubicam, Claude Hopkins, Rosser Reeves, Harry Scherman
and Art Kudner—abandoned the hard slog of writing
advertisements to become administrators. Not so John Caples.
He has stuck to his knitting—for 49 years. That is how he has
been able to accumulate his unique body of knowledge.
This is, without doubt, the most useful book about
advertising that I have ever read.

David Ogilvy
Chairman, Ogilvy & Mather, International
 INTRODUCTION TO THE FIFTH
THE STORY BEHIND THE MAN BEHIND HISTORY'S MOST
EDITION
FAMOUS AD
In the mid-roa ring-tw enties, at age 25, the same age as the
century, a shy young man in New York City was about to make
advertising history. A recent graduate from, of all places, the
Naval Academy, in his rookie tryout as an advertising
copywriter, he sat at the typewriter and wrote this headline:
THEY LAUGHED WHEN I SAT DOWN AT THE PIANO.
BUT WHEN I STARTED TO PLAY! —
Four pages of single-space copy followed. Unsuspected by
the writer, history was being born.
The young writer's name was John Caples, bom in
Manhattan, son of a doctor and a highly cultured mother.
At age 18, Caples entered Columbia University as a Naval
Reservist, but soon dropped out. A year later he enlisted in the
Navy as an ordinary seaman, but with an extraordinary goal.
He would study, prepare himself, and take the competitive
examination for Annapolis. So he polished brass, went to class,
passed handily, and entered the United States Naval Academy,
class of 1924.
At Annapolis he had to study engineering and did well.
But he also contributed a few poems to the Annapolis Log, the
school's magazine, and eventually became associate editor.
But in post-World War I, as in the 1990s, the Navy was
downsizing. John was given, and took, the option to forgo the
ensign's commission and to work for the B.S. degree in
electrical engineering—a degree that led to his employment by
the New York Telephone Company, a job he soon found totally
boring.
Rescue came in the form of Dr. Katherine Blackford, an
early practitioner of adult vocational guidance. For her advice
he had to pay $25 in advance—a staggering sum in those days
—and wait a month for a meeting and her written report.

xv
i INTRODUCTION TO THE FIFTH EDITION

In five typewritten pages she pointed out a variety of

negative factors about his employment future. But there was a
terse recommendation at the end. "I would not discourage you
in your ambition to develop yourself as a writer."
John took her advice. Concluding there was more money
to be made in writing advertising than in his childhood
ambition of newspaper reporting, he entered Columbia's
evening program and took courses in advertising principles
and copywriting. The latter course, especially, proved
invaluable. His samples from class made a hit with the copy
chief of a leading mail-order agency. He was offered a job at
$25 a week, $6 less than he made as an engineer. He grabbed
it!
That was in the fall of 1925. Newspaper and magazine
mail-order advertising flourished, as it had since the beginning
of the century. High among the many items bought by mail in
those days—as now—was self-improvement. Correspondence
schools did well. By mail you could improve your mind, learn a
language, improve your memory, learn to dance, improve your
physique, learn executive skills, learn the niceties of etiquette
and, of course, learn to play the piano.
John loved his new job and learned fast. His first ad to see
print, on October 3, 1925, was for Arthur Murray Dance
Studios. Its headline: "How a Faux Pas Made Me Popular."
From those early assignments and the response the ads
generated he learned two things: People very much want to be
popular, and they are always seeking a quick, easy way to
solve their problems.
Then came the assignment to write an ad selling a home
study course offered by the U.S. School of Music.
The copy ran to four typewritten pages, single-spaced.
But it was the headline that captured the imagination: "They
laughed when I sat down at the piano. But when I started to
play!—" Overnight it became a fixture on the American scene.
Vaudeville comedians made jokes about it with such knee-
slappers as "They laughed when I sat down at the piano.
Someone had stolen the stool." Newspaper columnists lam-
pooned it. Other copywriters "borrowed" from it, copied it,
paraphrased it.
ii INTRODUCTION TO THE FIFTH EDITION

"They laughed . . . " was hugely successful as an ad.

Within a month Caples reworked the formula for a
correspondence school course in French. "They grinned when
the waiter spoke to me in French—but their laughter changed
to amazement at my reply" was the headline. It too both rang
the bell as an advertisement and caught the public fancy.
INTRODUCTION TO THE FIFTH EDITION xvii

The John Caples ad that started a new school of advertising. To see how it
still flourishes, turn to the illustration at the end of this Introduction—and
to practically every other ad and direct mail package shown in this fifth
edition.
i INTRODUCTION TO THE FIFTH EDITION

In spite of his almost instant, industry-wide fame as a mail

order copywriter, Caples began to yearn for a job with more
prestige. "I yearned for the day," he explained years later,
"When I would see my ad in Harper's Monthly, The Atlantic, or
The Saturday Evening Post, instead of Physical Culture
magazine."
So in 1927 he joined the agency known as BBDO. It was
an association that was to last well over 50 years, interrupted
only by his return to the Navy in World War II. Via mail-order
advertising he had learned about testing copy. He went on to
pioneer other forms of testing, then shared what he learned in
articles and books such as Tested Advertising Methods, in my
opinion as a teacher and author, still the best basic book on
advertising copy.
I was John's fellow BBDO employee and friend for two
decades, and our friendship continued for 20 more after I left
the agency to teach at the University of Illinois. He was
amused—and I think flattered— when he became the subject
of my dissertation, especially its later publication (without all
the footnotes) as a popular book for the trade. Much of the
materials here comes from our conversations and
reminiscences throughout that time.
But let me close by returning to that magical year of 1925
when Dr. Caples' young son was dazzling the world of
advertising. At Christmas, he proudly took home his proof
book to show his mother. The reception was hardly what he
expected. She asked him questions such as, can people really
learn to play the piano by mail? and does this book really give
people a magnetic personality? "She read my headlines aloud,"
he later recalled, "with growing concern in her voice:
Tat men ... try this new reducing belt.'
'Overnight I stopped being the underdog!'
'60 days ago they called me "baldy"!'
"She closed my proof book, returned it to me, and said,
'You'd better not let your father see this.'"
John finished the story with a grin, then added, "Talk
about being a prophet without honor in your own mother's
kitchen!"
ii INTRODUCTION TO THE FIFTH EDITION

Gordon White
Professor Emeritus, University of Illinois
Six decades young and still going strong. Sixty years after John Caples
developed this first-person-story appeal, it still produces superb results.
But the headline alone isn't all. Subheads feature “Free," "50% Savings,"
and the offer to "See for Yourself," with an even bigger "FREE" offering
sample portfolios (note the plural "s"). There's a big toll-free number too,
still there after the coupon is removed. No wonder the ad increased lead
generation by 26 percent over the prior year, with a much higher
conversion rate. Surely John Caples smiles down from copywriters'
INTRODUCTION TO THE FIFTH EDITION 2

heaven!
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

WE COULDN'T HAVE DONE IT WITHOUT . . .

Here, in alphabetical order, are the advertisers that illustrate
this new edition. Wherever possible, we have identified the
men and women who did the ads and direct mail packages so
that they can see their names as well as their work in print.
Where the examples are award winners from result-based
competitions, they are identified. Two such identifications are
"CADM Tempo Awards" given by the Chicago Association of
Direct Marketing, and the "Benny," the Philadelphia Direct
Marketing Association's Benjamin Franklin awards.
The following categories are used for accreditation:
1. Advertiser.
2. Key Advertiser Person (KAP).
3. Copywriters (Copy).
4. Creative direction/Design/layout (Art).
5. Agency or in-house group.
Our heartfelt thanks to each and all!
American Federation of Teachers
KAP/Copy: Albert Shanker
American Federation of Teachers, Washington, D.C.
Andersen Consulting
KAP: Christine Cherry
Copy/Art: Client/Agency staffs
Madison & Summerdale, Inc., Deerfield, IL
Bell Atlantic
Initial package:
Copy. Scott Armstrong
Art\ Gema Kreivanas
i ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

Follow-up package:
Copy: Elliot Simmons Art: Michael Rowinski
Devon Direct Marketing & Advertising, Inc., Berwyn, PA
Canyon Ranch
KAP: Brian R. Shultz
Copy/Art: Weiss Whitten Stagliano/ Canyon Ranch
Caples Award
KAP: Andi Emerson
John Caples International Awards, Inc., New York, NY
Carnation Baby Formula
KAP: Patti Kirk
Copy/Layout: Cara Lipshie, Viv Alter Concept: Michael
Cancellieri McCann Direct, New York, NY
Chemical Bank
KAP: Don Hogle
Copy/Art: Client/agency creative and marketing staffs
McCann Erickson, New York, NY
Dayton's, Marshall Field's, Hudson's
KAP: Connie Soteropulos Copy: Heidi Rose Art: Bryan Pohl
D-MF-H Advertising Department, Minneapolis, MN
Evans, Inc.
KAP: Rob Steffen
Copy: Paul Benson, Anne Mclnnis
Art: Dale Stackler
State Advertising, Chicago, IL
Evanston Hospital
KAP: Jean Benzies, David Loveland Copy: Tom Bartholomew
Art: Dick Prow, Curt Ippensen, Dave Grinnell, Kim Callaway
Rhea & Kaiser Advertising, Naperville, IL
Fabrikant Fine Diamonds, Inc.
KAP: Andrew & Peter Fabrikant Copy: Sheldon J. Kravitz
Art: Richard Corralde Ultimo Advertising, Inc., New
York, NY
Foley-Belsaw
KAP: John Baenish
Copy: John Baenisch, Lavonne Hanshaw
Art: Lavonne Hanshaw
Field Advertising, Kansas City, MO
ii ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

Franklin Mint
KAP: Bill Molnar
Copy/Art: Franklin Mint staff
The Franklin Mint, Franklin Center, PA
Grizzard
KAP: Claude Grizzard
Copy: John Davies
Art: Terry Greer, John Sillesky
Grizzard—The Agency Team, Atlanta, GA
Guess?, Inc.
KAP: Paul Marciano Art: Paul Marciano
Paul Marciano Advertising, Los Angeles, CA
Helmsley Hotels
KAP: Joyce Beber
Copy: Joe Perz, Agency creative team
Art: James Hale, Joe Perz
Beber/Silver stein and Partners, Miami, FL
Jaguar Cars LTD
KAP: Jaguar USA Marketing Copy: Jim Herbert, Nancy
Vecilla, Steve Diamond Art: Rob Cohen, Peter White, Joe
Cupani Ogilvy & Mather Direct, New York, NY
Land Rover
KAP: Elizabeth A. Schama Copy: Ari Merkin Art: Allen
Richardson
Grace and Rothschild Advertising, New York, NY
Lands' End
KAP: Reta Brown
Copy/Art: Biederman, Kelly & Shaffer The Peer Group,
Dodgeville, WI
Lenox
Copy,/Art: Lenox creative staff Lenox Creative, Langhorne,
PA
Lufthansa
KAP: Jennifer Kinzinger
Copy/Art: Steve Cowles, Birgit Schwarz, Gary Scheiner,
Tom Drymalski, Leila Vuorenmaa, Michael Cancellieri, Joe
Cipani Ogilvy & Mather Direct, New York, NY
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS iii

MCI
Copy/Art: Stan Bennett
Devon Direct Marketing & Advertising, Inc., Berwyn, PA
Mobil Corporation
Copy/Art: Mobil staff
Mobil Public Affairs, Fairfax, VA
Original Pet Drink Co.
KAP: Eric Zurbuchan, Marc Duke
Copy: Eric Zurbuchan
Art: Eric Zurbuchan, Marc Duke
O. P. D. Advertising, Fort Lauderdale, FL
OX-Y Brand
KAP: T. S. Lenyg Copy: Patricia Schirmer Art: Armanda
Parton, NG Pei Pei Ogilvy & Mather Direct, Singapore
Pitney Bowes Copier Systems
KAP: Gary C. Battaglia
Copy/Art: Alan Fonorow
Ogilvy & Mather Singapore
Pitney Bowes Copier Systems
KAP: Gary C. Battaglia
Copy/Art: Alan Fonorow, Bob Schemmel
Kobs Gregory Passavant, Chicago, IL
S&S Mills Carpet
KAP: Elena Finizio
Copy: Nancy Thornton
Art: Nancy Thornton, Elizabeth Rushing
Bennett Kuhn Varner, Atlanta, GA
Sandoz Agro, Inc.
KAP: Jeff Cook
Copy: Jon Basinger, agency staff
Art: Nancy Pesile
Basinger & Associates, Inc., Atlanta, GA
Select Comfort
KAP: Susan Lichtenwalner Copy:
Dan von der Embse, Chuck
Dorsey Art: Dan von der Embse,
Von Direct Von Direct,
Minneapolis, MN
iv ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

Smith Barney
KAP: Catherine Kapta Copy/Art:
Client, agency staff McCann
Ericksen New York
Toyota
KAP: Jon Bucci Copy: Steve
Wilson
Art: Terri Balagia, A1 Abbott, Eric Gardner, Doug
Van Andel Saatchi & Saatchi DFS/Pacific,
Torrance, CA
United Airlines
KAP: Trudy Havens Copy: Tim Pontarelli Art: Tom
Walker, Ted Naron Leo Burnett, Chicago, IL

... and thanks to:

Michael Snell, my literary agent; the Prentice Hall
editorial staff; Mariann Hutlak and Marlys Lehmann,
Prentice Hall's great production/ copyeditors; Nancy Willson,
for her work on the illustrations. And,
 i ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

extra special thanks to my wife, Alice Joan Hahn, who

outspells SpellCheck™, outgrammars Fowler, and tolerates a
husband who insists on working at home.

T
he most difficult things to discover in the study of advertising
are facts. For example:
■ What kind of advertising headlines attract the most readers?
■ What kind of pictures get the most attention?
■ What sales appeals sell the most merchandise?
■ What kind of advertising copy is most effective in selling
your product or service?
It is easy to get opinions on these questions. It is hard to
get facts. The purpose of this book is to answer questions of
this kind. And the answers are based on the traceable results
from advertising that can be tested and measured.
Two CLASSES OF ADVERTISING
1. The Testers: Those who are continually testing their
advertisements to find out how much actual business each
advertisement brings in, for example, mail order
advertisers, classified advertisers, and department stores.
 ii ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

2. The Non-testers: The advertisers who, for one reason or

another, do little or no testing or measuring of advertising
results.
In a classic booklet on advertising, "Blind Advertising
Expenditures," John W. Blake states:
There is just one justification for advertising: Sales! Sales! Sales!
Sales that are immediate, sales that are abundant, sales that are
profitable. These are the results that mail order houses demand and
get from advertising. Why don't you?
In the general publicity field too much copy is judged solely by opinion
and appearance. Costly campaigns are launched, and often pay the
advertiser well. Yet the advertiser never knows the individual
performance of each advertisement. In a campaign of a dozen pieces of
copy it is possible for most of the achievement to be accomplished by
just one or two advertisements. All the rest could be duds. Not only is
this possible, it is very probable. All mail order men who are onto their
job know this. Too many literary faddists, and not enough salesmen,
write advertising. The general advertiser may question the above
statement; yet he knows that in a sales force of a dozen untried men,
not all will succeed.

General advertising greatly needs the cold-blooded, analytical,

scientific methods of mail order practice.

Perhaps in years to come, even more advertisers will use

scientific methods. Perhaps even more advertisers will run tested
copy in tested media. In answer to the question, "What will
advertising be like 30 years hence?" a famous advertising man
replied, "It will be more exact, more scientific, and therefore
produce more results." The fact that the nonsci- entific
advertisers have derived benefit from their efforts is a tribute,
not to their methods, but to the extraordinary power of
advertising.
MY FIRST TWO TEACHERS
The first week I worked in advertising, an artist said to me,
"Drawings are just the thing to illustrate these furniture
advertisements. Pen and ink sketches are so modem. They give
the product just the style that it needs."
A copywriter said, "We don't use headlines in these perfume
advertisements. Headlines would spoil the effect. Besides,
headlines are unnecessary for short copy."
 iii ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

I believed these statements. I believed that these men had a

real foundation for what they said. I tried to remember the rules
they laid down. "Pen and ink drawings are good in furniture
advertisements." "Headlines are not needed where short copy is
used." Every time I heard an advertising person talk about
advertising I listened carefully. I thought I was learning the rules
of the business.
Not long after that I began to work on mail order
advertising. Each advertisement was tested. Results were
tabulated. Not only each advertisement, but each publication had
to prove itself in actual sales.
I quickly learned that much of the talk abut advertising I had
listened to and believed in was just talk. Too often the speakers
were stating opinions they mistook for facts. And in many cases
the opinions were merely personal and did not even reflect
industry rules-of-thumb.
If those opinions could have been subject to hypnotic recall,
their real source would often have been laughable. An artist
might favor blue backgrounds in advertising because blue was
his current fiancee's favorite color. A copywriter might
recommend short copy because her first boss had told her, "I
would never read all that small print and I don't think anyone
else will either." An advertising manager might put a newspaper
on the list because he liked its editorials, or because the space
sales representative had a great personality.

FIRST STEPS IN PLANNING A CAMPAIGN

The steps outlined here are followed today by practically all
major advertisers. Smaller advertisers, with more limited
resources, should follow them as far as time and budgets permit,
using tested guidance such as that given throughout this book.
In planning an advertising campaign, the first step should be
to clear the decks of all opinions, all theories, all conjectures, all
prejudices.
The next step should be to find a scientific method of testing
the real strength of the different advertisements and the various
advertising media, such as publications, broadcasting, direct mail
advertising, and so on.
This takes a three-pronged approach:
 iv ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

1. Initial testing. Test different ads, commercials, direct

mailings (what the industry calls direct mail "packages")
against one another in their own media.
2. Expand testing of winners. Once you have found what works
best in each medium, test a much expanded list of individual
publications, radio stations, or direct mail lists against one
another.
3. Learn from the results. As you do this, you will be testing
whole media such as newspapers, magazines, broadcasting,
direct mail and so forth, against one another for future
attempts at selling similar products or services. In other
words, you are not only testing individual newspapers or
radio stations against one another, you are, at the same time,
testing newspapers as a class against magazines against
direct mail, and so on, to learn how they rank in providing
cost-effective sales results.
This preliminary three-step research takes time. Let it!
The time is well spent. To get started on the right foot—to
find the right appeal and the right place to advertise—is so
important that other considerations are insignificant by
comparison.

HOW PRELIMINARY RESEARCH PAYS OFF

I have seen one mail-order advertisement actually sell, not twice
as much, not three times as much, but 19-1/2 times as much
merchandise as another ad for the same product. Both
advertisements occupied the same space. Both were run in the
same publication. Both had photographic illustrations. Both had
carefully written copy. The difference was that one used the right
appeal and the other used the wrong appeal.
If I were a manufacturer and I hired an advertising agency or
had an in-house advertising staff, I would be vitally concerned
about getting the right appeal. I would much rather have a
hastily prepared advertisement based on the correct appeal than
20 beautiful pieces of copy with beautiful pictures featuring an
ineffective appeal.
Discovering the most effective appeal is often difficult. Often
 v ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

there are many seemingly attractive appeals, yet only one right
one. If my advertising department or agency had a year in which
to prepare a campaign for my product, I would be perfectly
satisfied if they spent 11 months in search of the right appeal and
one month—or one week, for that matter—preparing the actual
advertisements.

"APPEAL" ONLY ONE OF MANY ASPECTS THAT NEED

TESTING
But finding the right appeal is only one of many instances in
which facts must replace unfounded opinions:
■ Time and budget permitting, every logical advertising
medium should be tested.
■ Season or other specific dates should be checked.
"Christmas" catalogs, for instance, were mailed two months
earlier in 1996 than they were 20 years ago.
■ Location of advertising, both geographically and within each
medium, should be tracked for results.
■ Every single element in an advertisement—headline,
subhead, illustration, and copy—must be put there not
because it looks good, not because it sounds good, but
because testing has shown that it works best! See Figure 1.1
for an example of a campaign that got them all right.

WHEN YOU CAN'T PRETEST

There are cases in which pretesting is difficult, if not impossible;
for example, single-use advertisements and advertising with very
limited budgets. And even when time and budget permit, it is
difficult to test in advance the long-term effect of repeating an
advertising slogan over and over again. Faced with this problem,
learn from those who have tested and apply their results. Instead,
all too many advertisers decide by opinion or unproven theory in
setting their "Three W's" advertising policies:
1. Where to advertise
 vi ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

2. When to advertise
3. What to say in advertisements
Often the person whose opinion is final is not even an
advertising man or woman. It may be a vice president with a flair
for writing interoffice memos, or a manufacturer who knows
production from A to Z and nothing at all about advertising.
WTiat a wasteful, inefficient state of affairs! Compared with the
insistence on ever more efficient manufacturing and sales
techniques, many advertising methods are still in the dark ages.

NOT THEORY, BUT FACTS!

Now let us look at the other side of the picture. There are many
advertisers who waste not a penny on theory, who deal only with
facts. These advertisers test every advertisement and every
publication on a small scale before they use them on a large
scale. Every advertisement and every advertising medium must
prove itself by producing inquiries from interested prospects, or
leads for the sales staff or mail order and telephone sales, or
sales in stores. Some of these scientific advertisers spend
comparatively small sums in advertising. Yet they have made
their products as well known as certain advertisers who spend far
more. They make one advertising dollar do the work of several
dollars. How do they do this? What is their secret?
vii ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

Figure 1.1: Eye-opening blind response. Research showed that

first-time mothers viewed having a baby as three distinct and
perhaps stressful events (getting pregnant, being pregnant, and
giving birth) rather than one enjoyable experience in their life. In
addition, research showed that women were "information seekers"
who were actively pursuing help in what to expect during their preg-
nancy. Through a "blind" mailing, the agency and Evanston Hospital
viii ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

targeted 15,000 25-35-year-old married women without children. A

phenomenal 44 percent response identified 3,500 likely new mothers.
They then developed an inte-

grated print/direct-mail campaign to invite the information-seeking

women to free maternity seminars, which, incidentally, introduced
the women to the hospital and obstetrician referral service. Mailing
was coordinated with advertisements in selected zip/zone editions of
 ix ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

The Chicago Tribune's "Women's News section. The campaign

increased seminar registration by 50 percent, obstetrical referral by
40 percent, and increased hospital births by 10 percent. Winner, 1st
Place, Marketing: Integrated Media Campaign, CADM 1995 TEMPO
Award.
The answer is testing, testing, testing. For example, mail
order advertisers, supermarkets, and department stores watch
with eagle eyes the sales that result from every advertisement
and every publication. Based on proven results, they then spend
the bulk of their advertising dollars on tested copy in tested
media.

HOW TO TEST YOUR ADS

For anyone unfamiliar with advertising testing, here are three of
the easiest and most common methods:
1. Retail sales. When department stores or other retailers run
an advertisement for a certain article, they can judge their
advertising's effectiveness by the increase in sales over
previous days on each article advertised. Computer-recorded
laser-scanned checkout provides instant sales comparisons
and even automated reordering, if wanted.
Long before laser scanning, your editor worked on one of the first such
systems, at Orbach's in New York City. Every sales tag had a detachable
number key that was manually keypunched, then laboriously—and nois-
ily—sorted by the earliest "programmers." Twelve of us worked
throughout the evening to provide buyers the detailed overnight
records they now get instantly at the click of a mouse.

2. Test cities. Certain national advertisers use test cities or test

neighborhoods. They try out copy and design appeals there,
then compare the resulting sales with comparable cities or
neighborhoods that use the regular ads. Depending on the
increase in sales, additional, more widespread tests will
check the results before the new ads are "rolled out"; that is,
run nationally.
3. Key numbers. Other advertisers use key numbers in the
coupon of their advertisements. Notice the coupon in a
typical mail-order advertisement. Here is how the address in
the coupon might read:
 x ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

Acme Products Co.

200 Park Avenue, Dept. R-44-1 -7 New York, N.Y. 1 0 0 1 7
The key number in this advertisement is "Dept. R-44-1-7."
The letter "R" is the code for the publication in which the
advertisement ran. The number "44" designates the specific ad
and that ad only. It is used to identify that ad no matter where it
appears! The number "1" shows the month, January in this case,
and "7" the day of the month. If, on the same day, Acme Products
also runs that ad in a different medium and the code for that
publication is T, the key will read "T-44-1-7." A different
advertisement will change "44" to that ad's number. The part of
the key identifying a specific advertisement is never changed as
long as that advertisement remains the same. Equally important,
it is always changed when anything within the ad is made
different, no matter how seemingly trivial.
To keep the tracking—and understanding—of test results
simpler, use letters rather than numbers for changes on specific
ads: 4 4 A . . . 44B . . . 44G, rather than 44 ... 45 ... 51. Both
systems will tell you that there have been six changes in the
original advertisement, but only 44G shows this without having to
discover the number with which you began.
The key number was an invention that has done as much for
the science of advertising as the X-ray has done for the science of
medicine. It has made it practical, simple, and inexpensive to
know exactly how many inquiries or how many sales came from
each advertisement. The importance of this is far-reaching. It is
one of the greatest steps ever made toward taking the guesswork
out of advertising.
For instance, one of the important things you can learn
through the use of key numbers, as shown in Figure 1.2, is which
advertisements gain the most attention. By running two or more
advertisements for the same product, each with a different key
number, in the same publication, you can discover by simply
counting inquiries or telephone and coupon orders which
advertisement attracted the most readers. How to do this without
giving the first ad the reader sees a special advantage is
discussed in Chapter 18. Naturally, in a test of this kind, the
coupon and/or toll-free number must not be featured in some
advertisements and hidden in others. They must be given the
same prominence throughout the test.
The New Advertising
Strategy

Figure 1.2: Doing everything right! Begin with a prospect-targeting headline

plus to-the-point subheads, one asking the key question, the other promising the
answer. Use show-and-tell pictures to illustrate and explain key benefits... with
captions that mention the product name three times. Write fact-packed, benefit-
laden copy with a large 800 number that has the same extension as the coupon
code. Put a really tiny picture of the FREE video and brochure in the coupon, just
as Caples taught us. Finally, add a "violator" to tie in radio commercials with a
popular personality. Using Caples as its copywriting bible, this "totally
reengineered" advertising is proving the all-time winner! No one is surprised.
VALUE OF INQUIRIES
"But I don't care about coupon returns!" you exclaim. "What I want is
sales." This brings up a fundamental point. It has been proven many
times and by many advertisers that in a properly controlled test the
advertisements that bring the most inquiries—what our profession
The New Advertising
Strategy
calls the first step in "two-step" or "multistep" selling—usually bring
in the most sales.
Daniel Starch of "Starch Reports" fame, reached this conclusion
decades ago in his analysis of five million inquiries received by 165
firms over a period of 12 years. Today, when the average business-to-
business sales call costs more than $300, it is more true than ever,
and many advertisers "qualify" responses through telephone follow-
up before the salesperson goes to visit.
There are, of course, exceptions to the value of inquiries. An
advertisement with a picture of a free booklet or other attractive
premium at the top of the page and the headline "Send for this FREE
gift" may bring an avalanche of inquiries, but very few worthwhile
leads. In this case, the huge response has little relationship to the
true value of the advertisement.
There is also the compulsive coupon-clipper to contend with, the
man, woman, or child who goes through a magazine and clips any
coupon that offers anything free—sample, booklet, or premium.
Fortunately, this group is not large and what there is remains fairly
constant. Legally, however, anything offered as "free" must be
provided unless clearly qualified in immediate conjunction to the
offer. Some advertisers eliminate coupon-clippers by omitting the
coupon and using a "hidden offer" buried in the copy. The value of
this method—if any— is explained later.
The important thing to remember in testing a series of advertise-
ments is to keep the booklet, premium, or sample offer subordinated
and identical in all advertisements. If this is done, you will find that in
general the advertisements that bring the most inquiries also bring
the most sales.

THE TWO MOST IMPORTANT THINGS YOU WILL LEARN IN THIS BOOK
In the following chapters of this book, an effort will be made to do two
1 CHAPTER l
1. To explain the scientific principles of advertising that have been
learned by advertisers who know by actual test which kind of
advertisements sell the most goods, which headlines attract the
most readers, which publications are best, and which kind of
advertising illustrations and layouts are most effective.
2. To explain the methods of testing so that you may determine for
yourself just which headlines, appeals, illustrations, copy, and
media are best for you.

I read but one newspaper and that more for its advertisements than its
news.
Thomas Jefferson

T
here are 18 chapters in this book. Four of these chapters, or more
than one fifth of the entire book, deal with headlines of advertise-
ments. But four chapters are not too much space to devote to this
vital subject. In most advertisements, no matter how striking the
illustration, the headlines are critically important. The majority of the
public reads little else when deciding whether or not they are
interested. Exactly like the headlines in newspaper stories and
articles, they are the telegraphic messages that the advertiser puts
into big print for the public to read what follows.
The success of an entire advertising campaign may stand or fall
on what is said in the headlines of the individual advertisements. In
2 CHAPTER l
an article in a trade magazine, Don Belding wrote:
Inquiry returns show that the headline is 50 to 75 percent of the adver-
tisement. So, selling punch in your headline is about the most important
thing. It competes with news and articles and other headlines in picking out
readers. In fact, your single headline, in the average big-town newspaper,
competes with 350 news stories, 21 feature articles, and 85 advertisements.
And it competes in time, because, seen for a second, it is heeded, or passed
up, and there is no return by readers. . . .

In discussing the importance of headlines, Bruce Barton told how

results were increased by a change of headline on a correspondence-
school advertisement. Mr. Barton said:
The old headline was, "John Smith made $110,000 the first year writing
motion picture scenarios." The new headline was "John Smith sold his first
motion picture scenario for $9,000 one month after completing this Course."
The advertisement with the new headline drew enormously, and the
explanation is, of course, easy.
Every reader could imagine himself or herself making $9,000, but few could
imagine themselves making $110,000.
I feel we are in a period when the interesting headline is more indicated
than ever before. I believe that all copywriters ought to put on it the best
headline they can and then say to themselves, "How can that headline be
changed to be more interesting or appeal to more people?"

AN AD THAT FAILED . . . AND ONE THAT DIDN'T

Following are two headlines that were tested by a mail order
advertiser. One was a success, the other a failure. You probably know
which one won, but do you know why?
ARE YOU AFRAID OF MAKING MISTAKES IN ENGLISH?
DO YOU MAKE THESE MISTAKES IN ENGLISH?
The advertisements bearing these headlines were the same in
general appearance. And they both had the same copy appeal. The
difference in pulling power was due largely to the headline.
The second headline produced far more inquiries and orders.
Why? What quality does the second headline possess that the first one
lacks?
The word "these" in the second headline is what makes the
difference. The headline, "Do you make these mistakes in English?"
says in effect to the reader, "There are described below certain
blunders in English. Read the copy and see if you make these
blunders."
This arouses the readers' curiosity and self-interest. Here is free
information. They can read about these mistakes in English and learn
3 CHAPTER l
to avoid them. They may also find entertainment and self-satisfaction
in reading about the blunders of other people and saying to
themselves, "I would never make such silly mistakes as that."
Now consider the other headline, "Are you afraid of making mis-
takes in English?" This headline fails to even suggest to the reader
that there are some interesting blunders described below. It merely
suggests that the copy will be a sales talk for a book on English
grammar or a course in English. And who wants to read a sales talk?
Today, most experienced advertising people realize how much of
the effectiveness of an advertisement depends on the headline.
Every copywriter knows what it is to struggle with copy for
hours, for days—fixing it, polishing it, rearranging it. We have all been
guilty of leaving the headline until the last and then spending half an
hour on it—or perhaps only ten minutes. I did just that before I had
any experience with keyed copy and traceable results. Now, I spend
hours on headlines—days if necessary. And when I get a good
headline, I know that my task is nearly finished. Writing the copy can
usually be done in a short time if necessary. And that advertisement
will be a good one— that is, if the headline is really a "stopper."
What good is all the painstaking work on copy if the headline
isn't right? If the headline doesn't stop people, the copy might as well
be written in Greek.
If the headline of an advertisement is poor, the best copywriters
in the world can't write copy that will sell the goods. They haven't a
chance. Because if the headline is poor, the copy will not be read. And
copy that is not read does not sell goods. On the other hand, if the
headline is a good one, it is a relatively simple matter to write the
copy.

iruiHiimli ill In .-----

WHEN NOT TO WRITE THE HEADLINE FIRST

Of course, writing the headline first is based on your knowing what
you are selling so well that the copy will flow naturally no matter
where you begin. When that is not the case, begin by learning about
the product or service. Then, before starting on possible headlines,
write a first draft of the copy to help organize what you now know.
Somewhere in that copy you are likely to find the key selling point on
which to base your headline—not its words, but the concept on which
your headline will be based. Now spend all the time you need to get
the best headline possible, then rewrite and polish your copy to flow
naturally from final headline to the logo.
What do people see of advertising? Headlines! What do you your-
self see of advertising as you glance through a newspaper or
magazine? Headlines! What decides whether or not you stop a
moment and look at an advertisement, or even read a little of it? The
4 CHAPTER l
headline!
Of course, the illustration counts, too. Sometimes a striking
picture will make an advertisement good even if the headline is only
ordinary. But a good headline can make an advertisement good even
if the picture is poor. The combination of a good headline and a good
picture, as in Figure 2.1, is irresistible.
5 CHAPTER l

Figure 2.1: Moving your 4/wd out of the pack. PROBLEM: With
practically every manufacturer entering the tough-guy 4/wd market, give
yours additional appeal. SOLUTION: Translate a higher-price monthly
lease into a $17-a-day exotic vacation. The inventive "800-Fine 4WD" is a
sure winner too!
THREE CLASSES OF SUCCESSFUL HEADLINES
Advertisers who work with keyed copy find the majority of
 6 CHAPTER 2

their most successful headlines can be divided into three

classes:
1. Self-interest. The best headlines are those that appeal to
the reader's self-interest, that is, headlines based on
reader benefits. They offer readers something they want
—and can get from you. For example:
ANOTHER $50 RAISE RETIRE AT 55

2. News. The next-best headlines are those that give news.

For example:
NEW FEATURES OF THE FORD TRUCK DISCOVERED—A NEW KIND OF HAND CLEANER

3. Curiosity. The third-best headlines are those that arouse

curiosity. For example:
LOST: $35,000 ARE YOU PLAYING FAIR WITH YOUR WIFE?

However, the effectiveness of the average curiosity

headline is doubtful. For every curiosity headline that
succeeds in getting results, a dozen will fail.
Why is it that self-interest headlines are best and the
curiosity headlines only third best? You can answer this
question for yourself. Suppose you are looking through a
newspaper. You see a headline that arouses your curiosity. You
will read the copy if you have time. But suppose you see a
headline that offers you something you want. You will make
time to read the copy.
The headline that makes a definite offer of something
people want has a further advantage. It conveys its message to
people who read only headlines. And as every advertising pro
knows, there are scores of people who read only headlines for
every person who reads both headlines and copy.
Note this: The following curiosity headline and logotype
(company name) convey practically no message to the
newspaper glancers who read only the large print:
HERE'S ONE QUESTION YOU SHOULDN'T ASK YOUR WIFE [Copy and illustration]
ABC Life Insurance Company
Notice the difference in the following self-interest
headline and logotype:
YOU CAN LAUGH AT MONEY WORRIES IF YOU FOLLOW THIS SIMPLE PLAN
[Copy and illustration]
ABC Life Insurance Company
By merely reading the headline and logotype of this
second advertisement, the readers learn that a certain
company has a plan that will help them solve their money
 The Most Important Part of an Advertisement 7
problems. Actual returns show that this second advertisement
brought twice as many coupon inquiries as the first
advertisement and twice as many sales.
Occasionally, a curiosity headline is produced that does
compete successfully with self-interest headlines. For example,
an advertisement for a book of etiquette with the headline,
"What's wrong in this picture?" was an excellent puller.
Here is an astounding fact. Even today you can look
through almost any consumer or professional publication and
find headlines that possess not a single one of the necessary
qualities, such as self-interest or curiosity. Here are some
examples of meaningless headlines taken from magazines:
YOUTH CRIES UNTO YOUTH BLOW HOT—BLOW COLD AND THIS LITTLE GIRL WENT TO
MARKET NO REASON NOW JUST ONE QUESTION, PLEASE
Test these headlines yourself. Do they give news? Do they
offer you anything you want? Do they arouse your curiosity?
No. Absolutely no. These headlines might have some value if
they mentioned the name of the product advertised. Yet they
don't even do that.
But those headlines came from the 1950s. We've all
learned better by now, right? So let's look at some headlines
from a 1995 computer magazine:
TOMORROW'S HIGH-BANDWIDTH APPLICATIONS ARE GOING TO DEMAND A NETWORK
THAT CAN FLY
THE WEAPON OF YOUR DREAMS
PUT UP. OR SHUT UP.
AND ON THE SEVENTH DAY . . .
IF PATIENCE IS A VIRTUE, THEN WE MUST BE GOING TO HELL
What do these headlines mean, simply as selling
statements, even to the computer hack? What reason do they
give you for reading the copy when other advertisers use
headlines like this:

INTRODUCING FIVE NEW WAYS APC SMART-UPS INCREASES NETWORK RELIABILITY

or
GET THE ROUTER THAT PAYS FOR ITSELF
Then why are so many headlines like the first two groups
still used? Probably because somewhere, somehow, some
advertisers or copywriters thought they were clever and
cleverness would lead to readership and sales.
Quite obviously those headlines do not offer anything.
Then they must be intended to arouse curiosity. Do they? Read
them over and see for yourself. Does the headline, "Put Up. Or
Shut Up." arouse your curiosity? You may reply, "Combined
 8 CHAPTER 2

with the illustration, the headline may have meant something."

The answer is that this particular advertisement had no
illustration. And the illustration of almost all the other
advertisements, then and now, while clever, were of little or no
value in making the headline message clear.
The purpose of headlines must be to convey a message to
people who read only headlines, then decide whether or not
they will look at the copy. But do the first two groups of the
preceding headlines convey any reason to read further? None
whatever.
Perhaps the writers of these advertisements would say,
"But you should read the entire advertisement. Then you will
see how beautifully the headline ties up with the copy." This is
laughable. What reader cares how well the headline ties up
with copy? Do people read advertisements backwards? No.
They read the headline first. Only then, if they are interested,
do they read the copy. The business of judging a headline after
you read the copy is wrong. It takes for granted that
everybody reads the copy.
For example, the headline of the following advertisement
taken from The New York Times means little or nothing until
you read the copy:
IT'S SURE!
IT'S PERMANENT!
IT'S ALL MINE!
This is the feeling you get when the monthly Life Income starts
under a Retirement Annuity.
The monthly income can begin at any time between 50 and 70.
It is a most attractive self-pension plan.
Retirement Annuities are obtainable in $100 investment units.
Income is also guaranteed in event of total and permanent
disability. A substantial cash return is guaranteed if you do not
reach retirement age.
AB C LIFE INSURANCE COMPANY

Compare that meaningless headline—which was probably

mistaken for a permanent wave advertisement—with this
homely but effective mail order headline/picture caption:
CORN GONE IN 5 DAYS OR MONEY BACK
There's a headline that says something. There's a headline
that stands up on its hind legs and talks to its audience in a
language they understand. The picture of a man's foot with a
com plaster helped to make the meaning of the headline
absolutely clear.
 The Most Important Part of an Advertisement 9
Analyze the headline. "Corn Gone!" Instantly the man with
foot troubles knows he is being spoken to. "In 5 Days!" "Better
yet/' he says. .. . "Or Money Back." .. . "Sold!" he cries.
The best headlines are the ones that aim at a specific
audience and offer that "target market" something its readers
want and want badly.
Another thing: In order to impress your offer on the mind
of the reader or listener, it is necessary to put it into brief,
simple language. Your prospective customers may be'in a
hurry. They may be half asleep as they turn the pages, or
browsing the channels of their TV sets. Their thoughts are a
thousand miles from you and your product. No farfetched or
obscure statement will stop them. You have got to hit them
where they live—in the heart or in the head. You have got to
catch their eyes or ears with something simple, something
direct, something they want.

A QUICK FIRST TEST FOR HEADLINES

For consumer products or service, read your suggested
headlines to several people without telling them what you are
trying to sell and get their reactions. For technically
sophisticated products, use an audience familiar with the field.
If they would not immediately look at the copy, try again . . .
and again . . . and again. In his autobiography, David Ogilvy
tells of writing 104 headlines and trying them out on his
associates before he came up with the classic: “At 60 miles an
hour the loudest noise in the new Rolls-Royce comes from the
electric clock." If Ogilvy needed help in picking a headline
winner, you certainly needn't be bashful in following in his
footsteps.

Given a good product, the American advertising industry does

an efficient, imaginative and essential job of information and
promotion and makes an important contribution.
Dwight D. Eisenhower
10 CHAPTER 2

A
s Caples often pointed out, few, if any, headlines work
forever. But the lessons to be learned from his analyses of
why these examples worked—very well and very long—are
fully applicable today. We can take them with us and apply
them, regardless of media innovations, into the twenty-first
century—and probably beyond.
This chapter discusses ten successful headlines and
tells what made them successful. Here is headline No. 1.

1. HOW A FOOL STUNT MADE ME A STAR SALESMAN

The advertisement bearing this headline sold a large
number of correspondence courses in salesmanship. The ad
was repeated many times in many publications. Obviously
the success of the ad was due largely to its unusual headline.
Let us, therefore, examine the headline and see what special
qualities it possesses. Perhaps we can inject some of these
good qualities into our own future headlines.
This particular headline does two things: (1) It arouses
the readers' curiosity by making them want to know what
the fool stunt was. And (2) it appeals to their self-interest by
offering to tell them how to become a star salesman.
The copywriter could have written the headline this way:
HOW I DID A FOOL STUNT
This is a good curiosity headline and would have
The Most Important Part of an Advertisement 11
attracted a number of readers.
On the other hand, the copywriter could have written
the headline this way:
Headlines That Attract the Most Readers 1

HOW I BECAME A STAR SALESMAN

This is a good self-interest headline and would have
captured the interest of many prospects.
By combining the two features, curiosity and self-interest,
into a single headline—"How a fool stunt made me a star
salesman"—the copywriter produced one of the most successful
mail-order advertisements of its day.
One other point: In addition to curiosity and self-interest,
the headline possesses a third important quality. It suggests that
here is a quick and easy way to become a star salesman. If the
headline had read, "How two years' training made me a star
salesman," it would not have been so attractive.
Let us look at a few other tested, successful headlines and
see if we can discover the secret of their success. Take, for
example, the headline of one of the best advertisements for a
book of etiquette:

1. WHAT'S WRONG IN THIS PICTURE?

The illustration in the advertisement showed two women
walking along the street escorted by a man. The man was shown
walking between the two women.
The chief virtue of this headline is its curiosity value. It is a
challenge to the reader. Readers suspect that they know what is
wrong in the picture, but they have to read the copy to make
sure. Thus the headline accomplishes its main purpose. It gets
the reader into the copy.
Another virtue of the headline is its appeal to the self-
interest of the reader. Readers take it for granted that they will
find in the text of the advertisement the answer to the question,
"What's wrong in this picture?" Thus they will get free
information, a free lesson in etiquette.
Here is a successful headline for a course in memory
training:

2. HOW I IMPROVED MY MEMORY IN ONE EVENING

This is primarily a self-interest headline. A great many
people think they have poor memories. Hence, a method of
improving one's memory is bound to be attractive. The headline
also suggests that the method is quick and easy, that results may
be obtained in a single evening.
Next is a successful headline for a mail order book on the
subject of personality development. Although the value of a book
 2 CHAPTER 2

of this kind may be questioned by some people, this caption

proved to be a powerful one:
3. GIVE ME 5 DAYS AND I'LL GIVE YOU A MAGNETIC
PERSONALITY ... LET ME PROVE IT-FREE
This is a self-interest headline. People want to be liked by
other people. They want to be popular with their friends. This
advertisement offers to tell the reader how to accomplish this by
means of a magnetic personality.
The headline also suggests that here is a quick, easy way to
become magnetic. The method is apparently quick because the
headline says it takes only five days. The method seems easy,
because there is apparently no effort required on the customer's
part. The headline does not say, “How you can develop a
magnetic personality." It says, “Give me 5 days and I will give
you a magnetic personality."
Here is a headline that was used with excellent results to
introduce a new business course for executives:

5. ANNOUNCING
A NEW COURSE AND SERVICE FOR MEN AND WOMEN WHO WANT TO BE INDEPENDENT IN
THE NEXT FIVE YEARS
This is primarily a news headline. It announces something
new. It also strikes a strong self-interest note with the words
“for men and women who want to be independent in the next
five years."
Here is the headline for an advertisement selling a device
for people who are hard of hearing. This advertisement brought
a large number of orders.
6. THE DEAF NOW HEAR WHISPERS
This is primarily a self-interest headline. It appeals directly
to the proper audience and offers them the thing they want;
namely, an invention that aids the deaf. There is also curiosity
value in this headline. The reader wonders, “What can this
device be that enables formerly deaf people to hear whispers?"
Here is a headline for a mail-order course in selling real
estate. The advertisement bearing this headline was highly
successful and was repeated many times.

7. WANTED-YOUR SERVICES AS A HIGH-PAID REAL-

ESTATE SPECIALIST
This is purely a self-interest headline. It offers jobs—highly
Headlines That Attract the Most Readers 3

paid jobs. There are plenty of men and women in this country
who are dissatisfied with their work and their pay. It would be
difficult for these men and women to pass this advertisement
without reading it.
It should be further noted that the word "wanted" has
always been a good attention-getter. Readers instinctively stop
to find out what is wanted. They think perhaps they can furnish
the thing that is wanted and make a profit for themselves.
Here is the headline of an advertisement that brought
excellent results:

8. ANNOUNCING A NEW HOME MONEY-MAKING PLAN

This headline is a combination of news and self-interest.
The words "announcing" and "new" give the news flavor. The
self-interest element is expressed in the words "Home Money-
Making Plan."
Here is the headline for an advertisement that was notably
successful in selling a set of books containing the World's
Greatest Literature:

9. "NO TIME FOR YALE-TOOK COLLEGE HOME/' SAYS WELL-KNOWN

AUTHOR
This is primarily a self-interest headline. It is aimed at those
who never had a college education and who would welcome an
opportunity to continue their studies.
Sometimes a mail-order advertisement can be run for years
without wearing out. Here is the headline of just such an
advertisement. The product being sold is a course in self-
improvement.

10. I GAMBLED A POSTAGE STAMP AND WON $35,840 IN 2 YEARS

Here again is a headline that appeals primarily to the
reader's self- interest. Who wouldn't like to gamble a postage
stamp and win $35,840?
This headline also contains curiosity appeal. The reader
would like to know how on earth it is possible to gamble so little
and win so much. Furthermore, the plan seems easy. There is no
suggestion in the headline that any effort is required on the part
of the reader. All you have to do is to gamble a postage stamp
and the same big winnings may be yours.
Anyone experienced in advertising can probably guess the
plot of this advertisement, yet it proved phenomenally
 4 CHAPTER 2

successful. Even readers who know about "the headline game"

may well want to play! The postage stamp the reader is asked to
risk is the stamp necessary to send for the free booklet that tells
about the self-improvement course.
WHAT MAKES CERTAIN HEADLINES
SUCCESSFUL?
Having discussed ten headlines, all of which were outstandingly
successful in their respective fields, let us see wrhat qualities
they possess in common. Then, perhaps we can formulate the
test of a good headline. Here are the qualities: Two of the
headlines were news headlines. Four employed curiosity as a
means of getting the reader into the copy. Four suggested that
here is a quick and easy way to accomplish certain results. Ten
of the headlines—or, in other words, every single headline—
offered the readers something they wanted and therefore
appealed to their self-interest.
This analysis suggests that there are four important
qualities that a good headline may possess. They are:
1. Self-interest
2. News
3. Curiosity
4. Quick, easy way

Self-interest is by far the most important of these headline

qualities. News comes next in importance. Department stores
and other users of tested copy employ the news angle to a large
extent in their newspaper advertising.
Another important point, which has not been mentioned, is
believ- ability. In striving to produce an attractive headline, the
copywriter should not emphasize the "quick, easy way" to such
an extent that the headline becomes unbelievable. One aid to
believability is to use specific figures. Note the frequent use of
specific figures in the aforementioned successful headlines. For
example: "Give me 5 days. . . ," " . . . in one evening." " . . .
$35,480 in 2 years."

DO ADVERTISING AWARDS INDICATE TRUE

MERIT?
In considering advertising awards, always remember this: If you
Headlines That Attract the Most Readers 5

want a real judgment of the selling power of an advertisement or

direct- response mailing, that judgment must be based on
scientific, measurable results. All advertisements shown in this
edition are based on such documentation.
WHY NONSCIENTIFIC ADVERTISING WINS
ADVERTISING AWARDS
Unless results are based on such scientific evaluation, there are
a half dozen reasons why judges are apt to select poor headlines:
Reason Number One: Before voting on a headline, the
members of the jury read the copy. Thus, the meaning of many
an obscure headline is made clear to them.
The reading public uses the reverse method. If the headline
is obscure, they do not bother to read the copy.
Reason Number Two: Advertising juries are usually
composed of men and women who want to raise the image of the
advertising business. This is a praiseworthy undertaking.
Nevertheless, every advertising professional must answer this
question: Shall I spend my clients' money to raise the image of
the advertising business? Or shall I spend the money to increase
their sales?
Reason Number Three: The following two life insurance
headlines were judged by an advertising jury:

WHAT WOULD BECOME OF YOUR WIFE IF SOMETHING HAPPENED TO YOU?

GET RID OF MONEY WORRIES FOR GOOD!
The jury favored the first headline because it seemed to be
the more logical for life insurance. Also because it is more
altruistic and higher toned. Yet actual sales results showed that
the second headline was more effective.
Reason Number Four: Advertising juries give too much
weight to fine writing. As a matter of fact, there is little sales
value in fine writing. It is what you say that counts, not how you
say it. A valid argument presented in blunt language will sway
the reader more than a less valid argument beautifully
presented.
Reason Number Five: The business of judging
advertisements in a conference room creates a false atmosphere.
The judges are not buyers. They are advertising critics, and as
such they cannot always tell which advertisements would sell
them.
 6 CHAPTER 2

Reason Number Six: Advertising effectiveness can usually

be judged only by sales or by some action that may lead to a
sale, such as writing for a booklet or a sample. The real judge of
advertising is the woman who says to her grocer, "No, I don't
want Blank's Soap. I want that kind I saw advertised in the
newspapers last week."
More and more advertising professionals and manufacturers
are becoming sold on the idea that there should be less guessing
and more testing in the advertising business. The anecdote that
follows is typical of the reasons why:
A set of mail order ads of known results were submitted to 14
advertising clubs. Each club was requested to present these ads to its
members and ask them to pick out the best-selling ads.
About 50 percent of the judgments of these experienced advertising
men and women in the 14 advertising clubs were wrong when
compared with the actual sales results of the ads.
Therefore, it must be reasonable to assume that 50 percent of all
advertisements are ineffective and that even expert advertising
judgment without testing is unsafe in prejudging the selling power of
an ad.

Do not depend on opinions. Use some kind of objective test

to determine the relative effectiveness of advertisements.

The spider looks for a merchant who doesn't advertise so he can

spin a web across his door and lead a life of undisturbed peace!
Mark Twain
 RIGHT AND WRONG M ETHODS OF
WRITING H EADLINES

-------->______________________________________e--------

I
n the preceding chapter, we analyzed ten outstandingly
successful headlines and found that self-interest was the
principal quality they all had in common.
Following are the headlines of ten advertisements that
were outstanding failures. Each of these ten advertisements was
tested by running it in a magazine or newspaper in which
previous advertisements had been tested. These advertisements
brought so few inquiries and so few sales that they were never
used again. Let us consider the headlines of these failure
advertisements so that we will know what sort of headlines not
to write.

TEN HEADLINES THAT FAILED

"NO . . . NO . . . DON'T CALL ON ME!"
[Course in Public Speaking]
THE ODDS ARE 9 TO 1 AGAINST YOU [Business Training Course]

7
8 CHAPTER 4

"I'LL NEVER GIVE ANOTHER PARTY," SHE SOBBED [Book of Games for Parties]
A TEST OF HOW "WELL READ" YOU ARE [Book of Literary Gems]

IS WORRY ROBBING YOU OF THE GOOD THINGS OF LIFE?

[Life Insurance]
Right and Wrong Methods of Writing Headlines 9

THE TROUBLE WITH MANY MARRIED MEN IS . . .

[Life Insurance]
ARE YOU PLAYING FAIR WITH YOUR WIFE?
[Life Insurance]
ARE YOU LIVING IN A CIRCLE?
[Budget Book]
THE YEARS THAT THE LOCUST HATH EATEN [Business Training Course]
LETTERS WIVES DON'T WRITE TO THEIR UNSUCCESSFUL HUSBANDS [Business
Training Course]
In reading over these unsuccessful headlines, perhaps you
decided in your own mind what made them unsuccessful. See if
you agree with the following analysis:

1. All ten headlines are primarily curiosity headlines. For

example, the headline, "The Trouble with Many Married
Men Is . . attempts to get the readers into the copy by
making them want to find out what, if anything, is the
trouble with many married men.
2. None of the headlines gives news.
3. None of the headlines contains an offer of a benefit that
appeals to the reader's self-interest.
4. Seven of the headlines are negative. They paint the dark
side of the picture. For example, "Til never give another
party/ she sobbed."

Having analyzed ten successful headlines in the previous

chapter, we should now be able to set down a few fundamental
rules for writing a good headline.

FIVE RULES FOR WRITING HEADLINES

1. First and foremost, try to get self-interest into every
headline you write. Make your headline suggest to the
readers that here is something they want. This rule is so
fundamental that it would seem obvious. Yet the rule is
violated every day by scores of writers.
2. If you have news, such as a new product, or a new use for
an old product, be sure to get that news into your headline
in a big way.
3. Avoid headlines that merely provoke curiosity. Curiosity
10 CHAPTER 4

combined with news or self-interest is an excellent aid to

the pulling power of your headline, but curiosity by itself is
seldom enough. This fundamental rule is violated more
often than any other. Every issue of every magazine and
newspaper contains advertising headlines that attempt to
sell the reader through curiosity alone.
4. Avoid, when possible, headlines that paint the gloomy or
negative side of the picture. Take the cheerful, positive
angle.
5. Try to suggest in your headline that here is a quick and easy
way for the readers to get something they want.
In using this last suggestion—as mentioned previously—be
sure to make your headline believable. Here is the headline of an
advertisement that was tested by a correspondence school:
TO MEN AND WOMEN WHO WANT TO WORK LESS AND EARN MORE
This seems to sum up in a few words what people have
wanted ever since the world began. Yet the advertisement did
not bring many replies, probably because the headline was
unbelievable. It seemed too good to be true.

ADDITIONAL AIDS TO HEADLINE WRITING

Having set down five fundamental rules for writing a good
headline, let us now consider a few other aids to headline
writing that have been proven by actual sales tests. Here are 13
proven pointers for writing successful headlines:
1. A sensible point of view to take in writing a headline is this:
Try to decide what would make you buy the product.
Actually try to discover in your own mind what argument
would make you, the writer of the headline, part with good
money in order to buy the product or service you are
advertising. Then express in a few words this reason for
buying. That is your headline.
2. Do not try to make your headline so short that it fails to
express your idea properly. Brevity in headlines may be an
excellent quality, but it is not so important that all else
should be sacrificed for it. It is more important to say what
you want to say—to express your complete thought even if it
takes 20 words to do it—or 12 or 24, as in the very
successful ads in Figure 4.1.
11 CHAPTER l

Figure 4.1: What's in a [newspaper] name? Though the Fabrikant name

was established in the diamond community, it was unknown to the general
public. Therefore the creation of a personalized approach featuring a single
person, Lisa Cooper, with whom the prospects could relate. That ad and its
"Don't even think about selling" companion ran in The New York Times and
were instant successes, leading to a twelve-fold increase in advertising in
just three years. Since many respondents lived in upscale New Jersey
communities, the schedule was expanded to include their suburban
papers ... with practically zero additional response. When it came to
diamonds: the medium was, and is, the message!
Here is a lengthy but excellent headline for a travel bureau.
It tells a complete story:
THIS SUMMER THE WEST IS YOURS FOR AS LITTLE AS $827 AND UP . . .
12 CHAPTER 4

ALL-EXPENSE TOURS
14 THRILLING VACATIONS TO CHOOSE FROM
This headline would have been far less effective if the
writer, for the sake of brevity, had merely said:
THIS SUMMER THE WEST IS YOURS
Here is another lengthy but effective headline. It appeared
at the top of an advertisement for the New York Telephone
Company:
A 3-HOUR TRIP FOR A $10 ORDER! . . .
IT WOULD HAVE TAKEN 3 MINUTES BY TELEPHONE

3. Avoid the "dead" headline—the type of headline that sounds

as if it were written to be carved on a bronze tablet or
uttered in a solemn conclave by the chairman of the board
of directors. Here are examples:
UNUSUAL TIMES UNUSUAL VALUES
THE VALUE IN QUALITY
TRUE OPTIMISM

4. Avoid the "too smart" headline—the headline that instead of

making the readers want to buy your product simply makes
them exclaim "How clever!" Examples:
WOMEN! READ THIS SUMMERY SUMMARY
BANQUET SIZE FAMILY WISE WHY NOT GIVE EMERALDS AWAY?

5. Avoid the meaningless headline. Examples:

A PLAIN FACT FOR PLAIN PEOPLE WHEN, AS AND IF . . .

6. One way to persuade people to read an advertisement is to

suggest in the headline that the copy contains useful
information. Examples:
ADVICE TO WIVES WHOSE HUSBANDS DON'T SAVE MONEY
JEAN CARROLL'S PAGE ON HAIR BEAUTY HOW TO IMPROVE YOUR HANDWRITING A TINY
TREATMENT OF TREMENDOUS IMPORTANCE

7. Get the big point of your advertisement into your headline.

Use your headline as a hook to reach out and catch the
special group of people you are trying to interest. It is an old
saying that shoemakers' children usually have poor shoes.
Below is an example of a modem parallel—a poor
advertisement for an advertising consultant. The
advertisement occupied a full page in a trade magazine. The
reason it is poor is because the idea that should have been
expressed in the headline is not expressed in the headline,
Right and Wrong Methods of Writing Headlines 13
but in small print in the last paragraph of the advertisement.
Here is the actual advertisement:
ADVERTISER'S NOTE
Mr. A.B. Jones Director of X.Y.Z., LTD.
London, England
the well-known and old established international advertising
agency responsible for handling a number of American advertising
accounts in various parts of the world, will be in New York from
May 12th to 20th. Advertisers and agents wishing to consult them
with regard to overseas markets should write to:
Mr. A.B. Jones c/o Blank Agency, Inc.
Fifth Avenue New York
The last line of this advertisement contains the words
"overseas markets." That is the point of the entire
advertisement. It is addressed to advertisers and agencies
who want data regarding overseas markets. Yet this fact is
not mentioned until the end. It should have been mentioned in
the headline in order to attract the proper audience. An
advertiser who was actually looking for data regarding
overseas markets might read the headline of this
advertisement and turn the page, not realizing that the copy
contained the very data he wanted.
8. Although curiosity alone is seldom enough to make a good
headline, it is an excellent idea to get curiosity into your self-
interest headlines. For example, here are two purely self-
interest headlines:
HOW I SAVED MYSELF FROM BALDNESS MAKE $200 A DAY
Notice how these headlines are improved by revising them so
that they arouse curiosity in addition to offering the reader
something he or she wants:
HOW A STRANGE ACCIDENT SAVED ME FROM BALDNESS
IS $200 A DAY WORTH A POSTAGE STAMP?
Advertisements bearing these headlines were used in maga-
zines. The advertisements were extremely successful and
were repeated over and over again for years before sales fell
off to a point where the cost of the advertising space was
greater than the profits from the sales.
Compare the aforementioned tested headlines with the
following headlines taken from untested advertisements:
MEN MAY NOT ADMIT IT, BUT . . .
CHILDREN SHRIEK WITH JOY
LOOK TO THE SEA!
What hopeless, useless, senseless headlines! They say
14 CHAPTER 4

nothing, mean nothing, sell nothing. Yet scores of advertisers

are using headlines that are just as bad. It is unfortunate that
these advertisers do not test their copy. Or is it fortunate
perhaps? Sometimes ignorance is bliss.
9. Headlines that are merely a statement of fact are not effective
in getting people to read copy. For example:
WHEN DULL FILM COVERS TEETH, SMILES LOSE FASCINATION [Toothpaste
manufacturer]
NOTHING ROLLS LIKE A BALL [Ball bearing manufacturer]
The reason that these headlines are not effective in getting peo-
ple into the copy is that the reader knows what the copy is going
 CHAPTER 4

to say without reading it. It is going to say, "Use Brand X

Toothpaste" ... "Use Brand Y Ball Bearings." However, this type
of headline does have the advantage of getting a brief message
across to people who read only headlines.
The advertiser's logotype at the bottom of the ad can be consid-
ered as part of the headline. After reading the headline, the
reader instinctively looks down at the logotype to see what
company the message is from. Thus, the headline writer can
count on the name of the company to supplement and make
clear the meaning of the headline. For example, the following
four advertisements all have the same headline, but the headline
means something different in each case, owing to the different
logotypes.
END MONEY WORRIES [copy and
illustration]
The New York Business Training Institute
This advertisement suggests that here is a method of ending
money worries either through (1) some system of accounting, or
(2) through a course of training that will enable a man or woman
to earn more money.
END MONEY WORRIES [copy and
illustration]
Life Insurance Company
This advertisement suggests that here is a plan for ending
money worries by means of life insurance.
END MONEY WORRIES [copy and
illustration]
Macy's Department Store
This advertisement suggests that you may end money worries by
means of the money you save through Macy's reduced prices.
END MONEY WORRIES [copy and
illustration]
First National Bank
This advertisement obviously is a suggestion to end money wor-
ries through some plan for saving money.
The effect of the advertiser's logotype must be considered when
writing a headline.
Right and Wrong Methods of Writing Headlines 1
11. What is true of the logotype is also true of the picture used
to illustrate the advertisement. The picture may be used to
supplement and help make clear the meaning of the
headline. For example, a successful mail order
advertisement had the headline, "Fat Men." This headline
would not be entirely clear if it weren't for the fact that the
illustration showed a fat man being pulled in at the
waistline by a reducing belt.
12. Avoid the "hard-to-grasp" headline—the headline that
requires thought and is not clear at first glance. Here are
examples:
DEPENDABILITY—A WORD THAT GREW OUT OF A FACT
COMING AND GOING THROUGH NEW ORLEANS,
THE TOURING THOUSANDS PAUSE AND REFRESH THEMSELVES
IF EVERY WIFE KNEW WHAT EVERY WIDOW KNOWS,
NO HUSBAND WOULD BE WITHOUT LIFE INSURANCE
Remember that the readers' attention is yours for only a
single, involuntary instant. They will not use up their
valuable time trying to figure out what you mean. They will
simply turn the page.
13. Do not run advertisements without headlines. Some
advertisers do this in the mistaken notion that it is smart,
modern, and sophisticated. Because they do not test their
advertising, these advertisers do not realize that about the
only person who reads their copy is the proofreader who is
paid to read it.
You can't expect people to read your message unless you
first give them, in the headline, a powerful reason for reading it.
To run an advertisement without a headline is like opening a
store without hanging out a sign to tell people what kind of store
it is. A few customers may come into the store, but many
prospective customers will be lost.
If there is any exception to this rule, it is one in which an
excellent picture of the product is used. For example, a
beautiful, four-color picture of a bowl of delicious peaches with
the name Dei Monte at the bottom of the page conveys a
message without a headline.

HEADLINE-WRITING TECHNIQUES
Write a number of headlines for every advertisement and then
select the best one. The person who submits a dozen answers in
2 CHAPTER l
a prize contest has a better chance of winning than the person
who writes only one answer. In the same way the copywriter
who writes a dozen headlines has a better chance of writing a
good one than the copywriter who writes only one headline.
If you have time to write as many as 25 headlines, you
increase still further your chances of writing a good one. Put the
headlines away and read them over the next day. Try to take the
point of view of the bored customer. Try to decide which
headline would be most likely to stop you if you were turning the
pages of a magazine or a newspaper and you were not
interested in the advertising at all.
Before you make your final decision as to which headline to
use, it is a good idea to show your list of possible headlines to
someone who has never seen them before. Let some person
whose judgment you have found good in the past act as copy
chief.
You should not trust your own judgment entirely. You may
be prejudiced. You are too close to the headlines you have just
written. A headline whose meaning may be perfectly clear to
you may be puzzling to someone else.
If you could put your headlines away for a month and then
read them, you might be able actually to view them from the
customer's angle. But you can't wait a month. Therefore, get the
customer's reaction today by showing your headlines to
someone else.
Often a headline may have two meanings, one of which you
do not suspect. For example, a copywriter recently showed me
an allegorical piece of copy, the first sentence of which was:
DAVID DROPPED GOLIATH
This sentence gave me a mental picture of David holding
Goliath up in the air and suddenly dropping him to the ground.
That is not the impression the copywriter wanted me to get. He
wanted to say that David knocked out Goliath or that David
felled Goliath.

HOW TO HANDLE LONG HEADLINES

As mentioned previously, a long headline that really says
something is more effective than a brief heading that says
nothing. It is important, however, to handle the long headline
correctly. Here are two headlines taken from a national
magazine showing examples of the wrong way to handle the
long headline.
Right and Wrong Methods of Writing Headlines 3
WHY
MY SECOND DUPLEX IS THE ONLY CAR I HAVE EVER BEEN ABLE TO PAY CASH FOR
THERE'S SATISFACTION IN
KNOWING
THE APPEARANCE OF YOUR BATHROOM IS PLEASING TO GUESTS
The trouble with the arrangement of these headlines is that
the words in large print are words that by themselves mean
nothing. If you are going to emphasize certain words in the
headline, be sure that they are words that say something.
Here are two headlines taken from a national magazine
showing examples of the correct way to handle the long
headline. Notice that the emphasized words are words that
mean something.
NO MATTER WHERE YOU LIVE YOU NEED AMPLE
WINDSTORM INSURANCE
BRAND X'S
FINE COFFEE
IS SERVED IN THE HOME OF EACH OF THESE SURPRISINGLY DOMESTIC BACHELORS
Two ways to handle the long headline are
1. Print the entire headline in the same size type.
2. Play up one or more important words of the headline in
capitals, or extra-large, or extra-bold type.
The trouble with the first method is that a long headline all
printed in the same size type gives the effect of a gray tone
across the page. It is flat, uninteresting. Nothing sticks out to
stop the reader.
The second method is the better. It overcomes this
disadvantage. It has three factors in its favor:
1. By their very size, these words act as a "stopper."
2. The words in large or bolder print, if they are the right
words, help to select from the audience your "target
audience," the special group who are prospects for your
product.
3. These words in large or bolder print get a brief message
across to these prospects—a message that is almost
impossible to miss, no matter how fast the reader turns the
page.
Here is another example of the correct application of this
method of handling headlines. Consider the following headline,
which sells subscriptions to a weekly book review magazine:
CAN YOU TALK ABOUT BOOKS WITH THE REST OF THEM?
When this headline was used, it was printed this way:
4 CHAPTER l
CAN YOU TALK
ABOUT BOOKS
WITH THE REST OF THEM?
The proper audience was targeted, and their interest
aroused by the message that appeared in larger or bolder type.
Some headlines do not lend themselves to this sort of
emphasis. It is impossible to pick out two or three or even five
words that tell the story briefly. In cases of this kind, there are
two things you can do:
1. Recast the headline.
2. Put half the headline in larger or bolder type and subordinate
the rest of it.
Here are some more examples of the right way—as in Figure 4.2
— and wrong ways to emphasize certain words in headlines:

Figure 4.2: Emphatically CAPS! The only problem with John Caples'
suggestion to capitalize individual words for emphasis is knowing which
words to pick. Few advertisers do this as well as Toyota. (Why not capitalize
"good" in the headline? Because GOOD ... GOLD is a stopper, not a start-up
to the rest of the copy.) Individual words and short phrases such as BEST...
AMERICA... REPUTATION .. . GOLD STANDARD ... AIR BAGS .. . POWER . ..
RESTYLING ... and BROCHURE add the emphasis of 19 subheads without
using even one. Placing the headline beneath the main illustration and
putting the product name in both captions are selling bonuses too often
forgotten.
Right and Wrong Methods of Writing Headlines 5
Some of the wrong emphasis that you will find in ad
headlines is because an ad writer has handed to the designer or
layout artist a typed piece of copy and left it up to the artist to
decide which headline words to emphasize. This is unwise. The
writers should sit down with the artists and help them to select
meaningful words to emphasize. Artists tend to think in terms of
tone values and masses of light and shade. If the balance of a
layout is helped by putting the first word or the last word of the
headline in large letters, the artist may do it regardless of the
meaning or lack of meaning. I once heard the following amusing
exchange between a writer and an artist:
"The trouble with artists is that they think ads should be
looked at but not read," said the writer.
"The trouble with writers is that they think ads should be
read but not looked at," said the artist.
The net of it is that the best ads are produced when writer
and artist work together as a team.

LESSONS FROM CURRENT PUBLICATIONS

It is instructive to look through current magazines and
newspapers and compare the headlines being used by some of
the general advertisers with the headlines being used by the
mail order advertisers—the advertisers who can trace the sales
results from every ad.
The headlines below are taken from a single copy of a
magazine. Notice the vagueness and supposed cleverness of the
general headlines (List No. 1) as compared with the simple
directness of the mail order headlines (List No. 2).

List No. 1—Headlines used by General Advertisers

YOUR LUNCHEON ON MANY A SUMMER'S DAY!
WHAT'S RIGHT WITH THE WORLD WHEN GIRLS JUST WILL BE BOYS?
THIS NOSE BELONGS TO A THRIFTY WOMAN
BLANK'S CANDY—THE FIFTH THAT MAKES THE FOURSOME
LUCKY BABY
FIRST YOU LISTEN! THEN JUST DIP IN YOUR SPOON IT WON'T GO OFF!
List No. 2—Headlines used by Mail Order Advertisers
BE A HOTEL HOSTESS BANISH TEETERING FURNITURE LIFETIME
FLOOR COATING SPARE-TIME CASH
KILL ANT COLONIES AT THEIR SOURCE SPRAY YOUR WEEDS AWAY
WITH WEED OUT MATERNITY FROCKS
START A $10,000 LIFE INSURANCE POLICY FOR $1
6 CHAPTER l
THE FABULOUS FORD MODEL T FIRE ENGINE (SEE FIGURE 4.3)
HOLLYWOOD'S MAKE-UP SECRET
Could anything be more simple or more direct than these
mail order headlines? They are telegraphic. They get the story
to you in a few short words. They are absolutely clear and
understandable.
Mail-order ads of this kind are repeated again and again.
Sometimes they last for years before their effectiveness is
worn out.

Advertising nourishes the consuming power of men. It creates

wants for a better standard of living. It sets up before a man
the goal of a better home, better clothing, better food for
himself and his family. It spurs individual exertion and greater
production.
Winston Churchill
Right and Wrong Methods of Writing Headlines 7
8 CHAPTER l
Right and Wrong Methods of Writing Headlines 9

F
ormulas are applied to the writing of stories, plays, and
popular songs, and to the creation of dramas that are
broadcast daily on television. Can formulas be applied to
writing headlines and teasers for advertisements?
The answer is yes. Many successful headlines have been
written by this method. This chapter presents a checklist of 35
headline formulas that have worked successfully in the past
and may be expected to work successfully in the future.
As you review these formulas, with your product or
service in mind, you may find a formula that will give you a
good headline you can use. If not, you may be stimulated to
invent a new formula. New formulas are being invented all the
time. Or you may find that an old formula can be reworked into
a new pattern. This list of formulas is not intended to hamper
your creative thinking, but to guide your thinking into
profitable channels. Use the formulas not as a crutch but as a
springboard!
And remember, if you create a good headline, your task is
more than half completed. It will be a relatively easy matter to
write the copy. On the other hand, if you use a poor headline, it
doesn't matter how hard you labor over your copy because
your copy will not be read.
10 CHAPTER l
The headline formulas listed here can be applied, not only
to advertisements in publications, but also to headlines printed
on the outer envelopes of direct mail pieces. The same
formulas can be used in writing the opening sentences of radio
and television commercials.
Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers 11

NEWS HEADLINES
Let's begin with news headlines. One of the most important functions of
advertising is to present new products and to tell about new uses and new
improvements of old products. Department stores use news headlines
because they bring people into the stores. Mail-order advertisers use news
headlines whenever possible because they are good pullers. News headlines
are effective in getting attention and promoting sales. Therefore, the first
eight of these headline formulas are devoted to the presentation of news.
Here is the first formula:

1. Begin Your Headline with the Word "Introducing"

INTRODUCING [Brand Name]. A NEW GENERATION OF AFFORDABLE ART MATERIALS FOR

STUDENT ARTISTS.
INTRODUCING POLARFLEECE FOR THE HOME [Note Product Name] INTRODUCING ASPEN-GPS
SYSTEMS
INTRODUCING A SPECIAL GIFT FOR A SPECIAL TIME OF YEAR INTRODUCING THE ALL-NEW FORD
TAURUS
INTRODUCING FOUR NEW WAYS TO SAY I LOVE YOU EVERY DAY [Cat Food]
INTRODUCING A NEW WAY TO HELP BRIDGE THE GAP BETWEEN WHAT YOU'VE SAVED AND WHAT
YOU'LL NEED DURING RETIREMENT

2. BEGIN YOUR HEADLINE WITH THE WORD "ANNOUNCING"

ANNOUNCING A GREAT NEW CAR ANNOUNCING A NEW DICTIONARY
ANNOUNCING A NEW SELECTION OF [Brand Name] VIDEO CAMERAS ANNOUNCING NEW
FIRESTONE TIRES

ANNOUNCING A NEW HELP IN SOLVING THE HOMEOWNER'S PROBLEM The word

"Announcing" can take different forms. For example: GULF ANNOUNCES A NEW
AND DIFFERENT GASOLINE AN IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT TO HOMEOWNERS
3. USE WORDS THAT HAVE AN ANNOUNCEMENT QUALITY
FINALLY AN EXCITING NEW LOOK THAT ISN'T RETRO ANYTHING THANK YOU FOR MAKING
US AMERICA'S TRUCK COMPANY PRESENTING NEW 36" TALL BALLERINA DOLL TODAY'S
DUPONT SPONGE WITH MOP-UP ACTION GOOD-BYE . . . OLD-FASHIONED AIR
CONDITIONERS JUST PUBLISHED ... A NEW ENCYCLOPEDIA
Whenever a new product or a new improvement of an old product
arrives on the market, you should announce that fact. Announce it in a big
way—as in Figure 5.1. Spread the word "Introducing" or "Announcing" clear
across the page in large type. People are interested in announcements. They
will often read an announcement of a new improvement or a new product
regardless of whether or not they have any immediate need for the product.
Announcement copy is not a recent invention. The ancients used it.
Many ancient advertisements were announcements in the form of
proclamations.
After you have introduced your new product or your new improvement,
you
12 can continue to retain the news element in later advertisements
CHAPTER l by using
formula four.
4. BEGIN YOUR HEADLINE WITH THE WORD "NEW"
NEW LEMON BLOSSOM PIE
NEW STANDARD DRIVER AIR BAG. NEW ERGONOMIC INTERIOR. NEW 4- WHEEL AB5. NEW 6-CD
CHANGER. MORE POWERFUL ENGINE.
NEW PROGRESSIVE 100% WHITE MEAT CHICKEN SOUP
NEW 10 CHANNEL HAND-HELD GPS ONLY FROM MAGELLAN
NEW BLACK & DECKER ELECTRIC DRILL
NEW METHOD OF KEEPING YOUR PERSONAL FINANCES
When you have used the word "New" for all it is worth, you can continue
to give a news flavor to advertisements by employing formula number five.
5. Begin Your Headline with the Word "Now"
NOW IN PAPERBACK!
NOW . . . LEARN BOTH WAYS TO WRITE FOR PUBLICATION NOW EVEN-DEPTH TILLAGE IS
EVEN EASIER BOSTON AND L.A. NOW HOURLY [Airline]
NOW ON HOME VIDE
 Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers 6 1

Here is a
successful headline
Figure 5.1: The
only thing better
than everything.
How do you
introduce the new
airline paperless "E
Ticket"? Use a
seven word teaser
to fill the full
newspaper
page . . . followed
by a single word on
page two. That's
sure to get the
reader to the not-
so-small type at the
bottom. Note that
these were two
consecutive right-
hand pages, not a
spread.
14 CHAPTER l

which contains both "Now" and "New":

NOW THERE'S A SYSTEM! NEW SERIES LEADS TO GED SUCCESS
6. BEGIN YOUR HEADLINE WITH THE WORDS "AT LAST"
AT LAST! A STEAM IRON WITH A "MAGIC BRAIN"
AT LAST—YOU CAN DRIVE ALL OVER EUROPE WITH
ONE EASY-TO-FOLLOW ROAD ATLAS
AT LAST—A TOOTHBRUSH GUARANTEED FOR 6 MONTHS
Using the words "At last" creates the impression that here at
last, after long preparation, is a product that many people have
been waiting for.
A variation is to put the words "at last" at the end of your
headline, like this:
HAS A REMEDY FOR THE COMMON COLD BEEN FOUND AT LAST?
Here are two approaches to "at last" news quality without
using the actual words:
FINALLY PROFESSIONAL FLEA CONTROL AT A FAIR PRICE
IMAGINE AN AUTOMOBILE SO PRECISELY ENGINEERED IT FEELS AS IF IT WERE FORMED
FROM A SINGLE PIECE OF STEEL

7. PUT A DATE INTO YOUR HEADLINE

BEGINNING JUNE 1 . . . LOW SUMMER RATES AT THE MIAMI BILTMORE
ONE DAY ONLY. SUNDAY, AUGUST 6TH. 10:00 AM TO 6:00 PM [Piano Sale]
JULY SALE OF FASHION GLOVES
MONDAY SAVE 30% TO 60% ON THESE BOOKS
WHY G.E. BULBS GIVE MORE LIGHT THIS YEAR
A 19— [InsertYyear] WARNING FROM THE WALL STREET JOURNAL
REDUCE YOUR GOLF HANDICAP WITH THESE NEW 19— [Insert Year] GOLF
CLUBS
HOW TO KEEP AHEAD THIS SUMMER YOU CAN
SPEAK FRENCH BY OCTOBER 15
 Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers 6 1

8. Write Your Headline in News Style THE WINES YOU LOVED IN

PARIS ARE HERE BETTER HEARING IS SUDDENLY HERE THE WORLD'S

FIRST ATOMIC WATCH MODERN GIFT FROM OLD MEXICO DISCOVERED

—AMAZING WAY TO GROW HAIR ALL BIPOLARS ARE NOT CREATED

EQUAL [Awards Story]

COMFORT, WARMTH, QUIET AND SAFETY. A REMARKABLE HEATER.

THE MYTHS ABOUT BABIES ARE GONE. AND THESE INNOVATIVE TOYS HAVE TAKEN
THEIR PLACE
Other words and phrases that give a news flavor are "Just
invented/' and "Just off the press."
Here is a successful news headline that appeared at the top of
an advertisement selling business courses by mail:
JUST PUBLISHED

A NEW BOOKLET ANNOUNCING

A NEW SERIES OF BUSINESS COURSES

This headline uses the news formula no less than four times:
(1) Just Published, (2) new booklet, (3) announcing, (4) new
Business Courses.

HEADLINES THAT DEAL WITH PRICE

Sales tests show that one of the most important factors in any sale
is price. Readership surveys show that readers will often skip copy
set in big type in order to get to the bottom of an ad and read
prices set in small type.
The next three formulas are devoted to price. It is not always
practical to mention price in national magazine ads because prices
may vary in different areas. However, it is often practical and
desirable to mention price in local newspaper ads and in local
broadcast ads.
 Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers 6 1

9. FEATURE THE PRICE IN YOUR HEADLINE

LIGHTWEIGHT G.E. PORTABLE MIXER DOES ALL MIXING JOBS . . . ONLY $27.95
MAGNIFICENT ALL-MAHOGANY DINING ROOM . . . $749
GUARANTEED 17-JEWEL QUALITY WATCHES . . . $16.95
WOULD YOU SPEND $5 TO FEEL LIKE A MILLION?
IT'S TRUE—GENUINE KIDSKIN LEATHER ONLY $29.95 [Shoes]
"KILLER $500 CD PLAYER" [Note strengthening of price value through use, of
quoted testimonial.]
10. FEATURE REDUCED PRICE
This formula, as seen in Figure 5.2, is constantly used by retail
advertisers, as follows:
WITH UP TO $2,000 IN OPTIONS SAVINGS, IT'S MORE ATTAINABLE THAN EVER [Auto]
WOOL TWIST BROADLOOM USUALLY $12.95 SQ. YD. . . . SALE $8.88 SQ. YD. PIGSKIN
EXECUTIVE FILE CASE $19.80 (Reg. $35)
WAMSUTTA SUPERCALE SHEETS . . . SLIGHTLY IRREGULAR . . . $3.95 (If Perfect $6.95)
National advertisers also use this formula sometimes. For
example:
WHALE OF A COFFEE SALE . . . $2.00 OFF
LESS THAN HALF PRICE . . . STAINLESS STEEL KITCHEN SETS

11. FEATURE A SPECIAL MERCHANDISING OFFER

In this type of headline, you often make an offer that actually
causes you to lose money. You do this in order to entice a customer
to start using your product. Examples:
FOR BIG THIRSTS. 48 OZ. 49<t
DOUBLE THE TRADE-IN VALUE ON YOUR FUR
BIG PERENNIAL OFFER . . . 10 DELPHINIUMS $1
SPECIAL 1/2 PRICE INTRODUCTORY OFFER ... 8 MONTHS $8
30-DAY SUPPLY OF VITAMINS FOR $2.65
ANY 4 BOOKS (VALUE UP TO $43.95) FOR ONLY $1 EACH [Note that you must
mention "shipping and handling," if there is such a charge.]
2 CHAPTER l

Figure 5.2: Make eight words do the work of eight hundred!. While
not technically a "rebus," the use of the illustrations in Hudson's ad
has much the same effect by "telling" the breadth of the clearance
without having to go into wordy detail. Note that three of the four
figures look straight out to catch the eyes of the reader. In
communities with only a single Hudson's, the address appears
below the store name.
12. FEATURE AN EASY PAYMENT PLAN
Sales tests show that the offer to sell merchandise on the
installment plan creates many sales that otherwise would be lost.
 Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers 6 1

Many ads mention easy payments in the copy. Some successful ads
have featured this appeal in the headline. Examples:
ORDER NOW ... PAY AFTER JANUARY 10
ONLY $2 A WEEK BUYS THIS NEW CASSETTE PLAYER
NO MONEY DOWN . . . EASY PAYMENTS WHEN YOU BUY CYCLONE FENCE

13. FEATURE A FREE OFFER

A free offer is a device that frequently leads to future sales. The
free offer may take several forms as follows: (1) a free trial; (2) a
sample of the product or service; (3) a booklet about the product;
or (4) a premium that requires the purchase of the product, (5) or
a combination of any of the four. (See Figure 5.3). Examples:
FREE 10-DAY TRIAL OF THREE-RECORD ALBUM
FREE PLATO AND ARISTOTLE
FREE TRIAL LESSON
FREE CONSULTATION
FREE TO BRIDES ... $2 TO ANYONE ELSE
FREE GRAY HAIR TREATMENT
FREE PLANS FOR A CLEVER VALENTINE'S DAY PARTY
"Free" does not have to be the first word, but unless you are
testing a hidden offer, be sure it gets special emphasis:
WHEN YOU DONATE $10 TO EASTER SEALS, WE'LL DONATE A MOTOROLA PORTABLE TO
YOU FREE [Cellular Phone Service]
A SMALL BUSINESS OFFER JUST FOR YOU. GET AUGUST FREE [Telephone]
100 FREE HAIRCUTS. IF YOU'RE FREE SATURDAY, SO ARE WE.
BUY A NEW WHIRLPOOL OVER-THE-RANGE MICROWAVE AND GET THIS [Counter]
SPACE FREE [A Different Kind of "Free" Offer]

14. OFFER INFORMATION OF VALUE

People buy newspapers and magazines to read articles that give
them information. Therefore, it is possible to get high readership
by writing your ad in the form of a helpful article. The copy usually
consists of three parts, as follows: Part 1: Information without
sales talk, Part 2:
 Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers 6 1

Information interwoven with sales talk, Part 3: All sales talk. Here
are examples of headlines of ads of this kind:
ONLY ONE OF THESE SAFETY FEATURES CAN HELP YOU AVOID AN ACCIDENT
INSIDER'S GUIDE TO OLD BOOKS, ETC.
MINISKIRTS AREN'T THE ONLY WAY TO FEEL YOUNG
IF YOU WANT TO SEE WHERE THE WORLD IS GOING, LOOK HERE [University]
DO YOU MAKE THESE MISTAKES IN ENGLISH?
STRAIGHT FACTS ON WHEN TO TAKE PROFITS
TWO EASY TUNA "SHORT PIE" DISHES WITH BISQUICK
BARRON'S TELLS HOW "SOAPLESS SOAP" IS CREATING NEW MARKETS
FOLLOW THIS AGRICO PLAN TO A GREENER LAWN

15. Tell a Story

People buy magazines in order to read fiction and nonfiction
stories. Therefore, you can get high readership by writing a
headline that offers the reader a story. In addition to high
readership, this method offers the following advantages, as seen in
Figure 5.4: (1) A good story makes your message clear; and (2) a
good story makes your message compelling. The effectiveness of
stories was illustrated long ago by the parables in the Bible.
Some of the following headlines not only sold merchandise or
services, but also became famous.
HOW I IMPROVED MY MEMORY IN ONE EVENING THEY LAUGHED WHEN I SAT DOWN
AT THE PIANO THE DIARY OF A LONESOME GIRL HOW I BECAME POPULAR OVERNIGHT
OFTEN A BRIDESMAID BUT NEVER A BRIDE
DURING THE FIRST MONTH, WE RECOMMEND YOU PULL OVER EVERY FEW HUNDRED
MILES TO GIVE YOUR GRIN MUSCLES A REST [Auto]
MRS. ROGERS' 4TH GRADE CLASS PROVED HEROES REALLY DO LIVE OUTSIDE [Theme
Park]
THE TALLEST RECYCLING STORY EVER TOLD
Note: The most successful story headlines (from a sales
standpoint) are those that select the right audience. For example,
the aforementioned headline selling a memory course contains the
word "memory" in the headline.
 Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers 6 1

Figure 5.3: Relationship marketing for success.

PROBLEM: 90% of the infant formula market was locked into
pharmaceutical companies' hospital- or doctor-recommended brands.
SOLUTION: Be the only supplier to use consumer advertising to speak
directly to prospective and new mothers. Use magazines, television,
and point-of-purchase to extol the benefits of something new and
unique: Carnation's FREE "Special Delivery Club."
2 CHAPTER l

Enrollment by the hundreds of thousands provided a member-

get-member data base at half the single membership cost.
Members got personalized mailings that helped in planning
from pregnancy through birth, and in caring for infant and
mother thereafter.
RESULT: Carnation's relationship marketing effort has been
successful far beyond expectation. In a stagnant category
between 1992 and 1995, it doubled its market share. Perhaps
Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers 6 1

greatest compliment of all, competitors started their own

"clubs" too!
4 CHAPTER l

Figure 5.4: Just the facts, but make it interesting. Put your facts
into story form to make them stick in memory, Begin with the
headline (12 miles!) Continue with weave and yam. (You may not
remember what shirtmakers call it, but you're impressed.) Tell
about and illustrate a few of the sewing steps (not all 69), about
your use of "super durable" buttons (only 62 in the whole world),
and 120 lock- stitched buttonholes. Tell a story with about a dozen
facts in all, plus the promise of a great price and a free catalog. Put
the headline under the picture and give the same code to the 800
number and the coupon. Hear the phones begin to ring off the
hook!
USING KEY WORDS IN HEADLINES
 Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers 6 1

The next ten formulas deal with key words.

16. BEGIN YOUR HEADLINE WITH THE WORDS "HOW TO"
Certain key words in headlines not only increase readership, but
also have a beneficial effect on copywriters by forcing them to
write copy that is in the proper groove. For example, if a headline
begins with the words "How to," the copywriter is forced to write
copy that tells how to do something, and that is exactly the kind of
copy the reader desires.
HOW TO TURN 40 WITHOUT TURNING TO BIFFOCALS [Disposable Contact
Lenses]
HOW TO BRING HOME THE RIGHT HOME-THEATER RECEIVER
HOW TO USE THE BATHROOM [Public-Service Water Usage Guide]
HOW TO DO CENTRAL AMERICA ON $1 7 A DAY [Utility Vehicle]
HOW TO END MONEY WORRIES
HOW TO GET A BETTER POSITION
HOW TO START A BACKYARD GARDEN
HOW TO KEEP YOUR HUSBAND HOME . . . AND HAPPY
People are interested in learning how to do things. They will
eagerly read advertisements that tell them how to do the things
they want to do.
The words "How to" have also been found valuable in other
forms of writing. One time I said to a magazine editor, "Mail order
advertisers discovered long ago that advertisements whose
headlines begin with the words 'How to' bring a large number of
inquiries."
The editor replied, "We discovered the same thing in our
work. Magazine articles whose titles begin with the words 'How
to' are popular with readers. Such articles actually increase
circulation."
Closely related to the above headlines are those beginning
with the word "How."

17. BEGIN YOUR HEADLINE WITH T HE WORD "How"

"HOW DO I CONNECT MY BUSINESS TO THE INTERNET?" 1-800-827-ETC.
HOW MANY A DOWN-AND-OUT KITCHEN HAS BEEN REFORMED
HOW THIS NEW INVENTION IS REVOLUTIONIZING CONCRETE
CONSTRUCTION
HOW YOUR ENERGY CURVE RESPONDS TO THE WORLD'S QUICKEST HOT BREAKFAST
HOW I EARN MY LIVING IN 4 HOURS A DAY
6 CHAPTER l

HOW I STARTED A NEW LIFE WITH $7

HOW PEPPERIDGE FARMS BREAD HELPS YOU KEEP THAT RADIANT LOOK
HOW CAN THESE MAGNIFICENT NATURE GUIDES BE SOLD FOR ONLY [PRICE]?

18. BEGIN YOUR HEADLINE WITH THE WORD "WHY"

WHY THESE VITAMINS CAN MAKE YOU FEEL PEPPIER WHY YOUR FEET HURT
WHY G.E. BULBS GIVE MORE LIGHT THIS YEAR
WHY SOME PEOPLE ALMOST ALWAYS MAKE MONEY IN THE STOCK MARKET

19. BEGIN YOUR HEADLINE WITH THE WORD "WHICH"

WHICH STOCKS WILL OUTPERFORM THE S&P 500® OVER THE NEXT 12 MONTHS?
WHICH IS THE BEST BATTERY VALUE FOR YOUR CAR?
WHICH OF THESE FIVE SKIN TROUBLES WOULD YOU LIKE TO END?
A slightly different handling of this formula is seen in the fol-
lowing:

DO YOU HAVE THESE SYMPTOMS OF NERVOUS EXHAUSTION?

This type of headline has two advantages: (1) It is interesting.
It appeals to the readers' keen interest in themselves. They like to
find out if their own difficulty is among those mentioned. (2) The
mentioning of a number of symptoms enables the copywriter to
cover much ground. Almost every reader is likely to have at least
one of the symptoms.

20. BEGIN YOUR HEADLINE WITH THE WORDS "WHO ELSE"

WHO ELSE WANTS A WHITER WASH—WITH NO HARD WORK?
WHO ELSE WANTS A KISSABLE COMPLEXION WITHIN 30 DAYS?
WHO ELSE HAS HAIR THAT WON'T STAY COMBED?

21. BEGIN YOUR HEADLINE WITH THE WORD "WANTED"

WANTED! MAN OR WOMAN WITH CAR TO RUN STORE ON WHEELS
WANTED. AUTOGRAPHS AND HISTORICAL DOCUMENTS
WANTED. A FEW GOOD MEN [For many years, the recruiting slogan of
the U.S. Marine Corps]
WANTED—YOUR SERVICES AS A HIGH-PAID REAL-ESTATE SPECIALIST
 Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers 6 1
WANTED—SAFE MEN FOR DANGEROUS TIMES
The word "Wanted" is a compelling word. It makes the reader curious
to know what is wanted. Furthermore, the headline "Wanted— Your
services as a high-paid real-estate specialist" suggests a great demand for
real-estate specialists. As mentioned previously, this particular headline
belonged to a couponed advertisement and appeared again and again in
many magazines—proof enough of its effectiveness!
22. BEGIN YOUR HEADLINE WITH THE WORD "THIS"
THIS SOOTHING BEAUTY BATH IS ASTONISHING TO FASTIDIOUS WOMEN
THIS HOLIDAY SEASON, STAY AWAY FROM YOUR RELATIVES [Hotel Chain]
THIS KIND OF LUXURY IS LIKE STEPPING BACK INTO THE 1 980S. EXCEPT THIS TIME YOU CAN
ACTUALLY AFFORD IT. [Auto]
THIS IS THE QUIETEST DISHWASHER IN AMERICA
THIS FRIENDLY SIGN . . . EVERYWHERE
Beginning a headline with the word "This" has two advantages: (1) It
makes the headline specific and, (2) It draws attention to the product you
are advertising.
23. BEGIN YOUR HEADLINE WITH THE WORD "BECAUSE"
BECAUSE YOUR PET'S QUALITY OF LIFE IS IMPORTANT TO YOU [Cat Food]
BECAUSE FLEAS COME BACK
24. BEGIN YOUR HEADLINE WITH THE WORD "IF"
IF THEY GAVE AWARDS FOR CASH MANAGEMENT, WE'D BE THANKING THE ACADEMY
IF THEY EVER BUILD AN AUTOBAHN STATESIDE, YOU'LL BE READY
IF PEOPLE SEEM TO BE WORKING FASTER, IT'S NOT THE COFFEE [Off ice Machine]
IF YOU SAVOR GROWTH AND SECURITY, WE GIVE AN EDGE
IF YOU THINK THE ULTIMATE SPEAKER SYSTEM WOULD HAVE A SUBWOOFER, YOU'RE
HALF RIGHT
IF YOU WANT A WORTHY COMPARISON, ASK TO SEE IT IN GREEN [Motorcycle]
Here is an "if" formula that has practically unlimited application:
IF YOU THINK YOU CAN'T AFFORD [Product or Service], YOU HAVEN'T CHECKED
[Special Discount, Leasing Terms, etc.]
 Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers 6 1
A formula that has been proved by advertisers who use keyed copy is
to offer advice. This is accomplished employing formula number 25.
25. tJEGiN YOUR HEADLINE WITH THE WORD "ADVICE"
ADVICE TO A YOUNG PERSON STARTING OUT IN BUSINESS ADVICE TO HUSBANDS
ADVICE TO BRIDES

The word "Advice" suggests to the readers that they will discover
some useful information if they read the copy. The headline doesn't ask
them to buy anything. It simply offers free advice. Naturally, this is an
attractive offer. After you have enticed the readers into the copy, you can
include sales talk in addition to advice.
The preceding ten formulas employing key words do not exhaust the
list of key words you can use. You can find other key words in the
headlines you see in daily newspapers and in the titles of books and
magazine articles. For example, in the following titles, the key words are
printed in italics:
PLAIN TALKS WITH HUSBANDS AND WIVES
COMMON FAULTS IN ENGLISH
PRINCIPLES OF ELECTRICITY
WHAT EVERY GIRL SHOULD KNOW
FACTS YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT SKIN CARE

26. USE A TESTIMONIAL-STYLE HEADLINE

Your headline can be an actual testimonial or it can be a testimonial-style
headline. Here are three examples of each:
LET ME TELL YOU HOW I REDUCED FOR KEEPS WHY I CRIED
AFTER THE CEREMONY
I WAS GOING BROKE—SO I STARTED READING THE WALL STREET JOURNAL
"DISCOVER THE GREATEST VALUE IN HIGH-END LOUDSPEAKERS"
[Quoted from Magazine Review]
"AFTER MONTHS IN THE TAKLA MAKAN DESERT, NOT ONLY DO WE SWEAR BY THIS
PROTECTION SYSTEM, OUR CAMELS LOVE IT TOO" [Clothing]
"DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MUCH FAT IS IN THIS CREAMY CHOCOLATE PUDDING?
NONE." [Person Speaking Is Pictured]
27. OFFER THE READER A TEST
CAN YOUR SCALP PASS THE FINGERNAIL TEST?
CAN YOUR KITCHEN PASS THE GUEST TEST?
CAN YOU PASS THIS MEMORY TEST?
A TEST OF YOUR WRITING ABILITY

28. USE A ONE-WORD HEADLINE

2 CHAPTER l
Advertisers who run small ads are sometimes able to find a single word
that can serve as a headline. This method is successful if the single word is
meaningful and selects the right audience. The method has the advantage
that the single word can be printed in big type and thus give big display to
a small ad. Examples:
ACCOUNTING LAW
AVIATION PATENTS
DIAMONDS NERVES
REDUCE CORNS
BASHFUL? VITAMINS

You can take it for granted that these one-word headlines are effec-
tive. Otherwise, mail order and patent medicine advertisers would not
continue to use them year after year.
Two all-time classics as one-word headlines are HERNIA and SEX.
The former sold trusses and appeared for decades in the classified-
advertising sections of men's magazines such as Popular Mechanics. It
was so successful in finding and selling its targeted audience that the
Hahn agency begins its analysis of each proposed headline with the words:
"Where's the 'hernia'?" The second classic has appeared for more than 50
years in hundreds of college papers just before the end of the school year
in a fairly large ad somewhat like this:

SEX
Now that we have your attention, here's how to get the most money for your used
text books . . . etc.
(Book Store Logo)
29. USE A TWO-WORD HEADLINE
Sometimes it is impossible to find a single word that will convey a
meaningful message about your product or service. In that case, you can
use a two-word headline. Thus, the 1996 equivalent of the one-word
Hernia now uses the two-word headline: HERNIA TRUSSES. Other
examples:
FREE MONEY (COMPUTER PROGRAM FOR BANKING) For this all-time two-word winner,
see Figure 5.5.
BE STRONG [Foods]
ENGINEERING OPPORTUNITIES
FARM ANIMAL
WALK SOFTLY [Hiking Footwear]
 Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers 6 1
GOOD RIDDANCE [Skin Cream]
ABSOLUT PARIS [One of a Series Using Well-Known Place Names]
ITCHY SCALP
DIAPER RASH
PUBLIC SPEAKING
HEAD COLD

30. USE A THREE-WORD HEADLINE

BURN FAT FASTER
GET AUGUST FREE [Long-Distance Service)
EXPAND WITH STYLE [Home Remodelers]
DOUBLE BONUS SALE!

31. WARN THE READER TO DELAY BUYING

Most headlines urge you to buy something. Therefore, a headline advising
"Don't buy" is an effective stopper. Examples:
BUY NO DESK UNTIL YOU HAVE SEEN THE NEW, ALL-STEEL EXECUTIVE
READ THIS BEFORE YOU ORDER YOUR ZOYSIA GRASS
DON'T BUY CAR INSURANCE UNTIL YOU HAVE READ THESE FACTS
BUY NO MORE SOAP UNTIL YOU HAVE TRIED AMAZING NEW [Name of Brand]

FREE MONEY

For a limited time, Microsoft*Money for Wtodows*951$ yours free from Chemical Bank.
&Q*raic^,^belle«ih*be*i^iebii^ SAnmyEhsStetfctyai Ttait why vK'm wto&wkS Ohnt taking, Ms ibe tnca eflosm vwf ewr «o Chanted
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mar^yt^mm^beiaii* now|rxi€^ck»rakndyoKsr«DCSKiniinfcmi«tK*s you K$»bdfe*J®niMy 31,1996, we 11 ^ju Miomoft* Money for frer. For more infonmtloa or to
gist started with Otthne Banking today, call 1-900-CHEMBANK.
4 CHAPTER
Expect more from us*l

Figure 5.5: Make an offer they can't refuse. The ultimate in New York
Times full- page, two-word headlines. Three insertions generated 578
calls and 349 applications the first week. Nuff said.
Sometimes there are totally unexpected—and delightful—conse-
quences. When Rand McNally was forced to delay the introduction of a
new line of school maps at the major buyers' convention, advertising
manager Jack Heimerdinger (now an independent consultant in Plainfield,
IL), rented billboards surrounding the convention site. His message:

A few weeks later, Andrew McNally III told Jack that several pres-
idents of competing map companies had called to chide him for the neg-
ative approach. "I told them I was surprised to hear that, since it was the
most successful map sales convention we've ever had."
Even more surprises followed. Since no other company immediately
purchased the billboards at this popular site, they remained up for four
more educational conventions, even though Rand McNally was not
exhibiting. At the conclusions of each of those shows, Jack got a call from
the advertising manager of the company occupying Booth 138. Each had
the same story: "We just want you to know that your billboards gave us the
biggest traffic we've ever had. And lots of them bought, once they got over
the surprise of finding us there. Let us know when you do that again!"

32. LET THE ADVERTISER SPEAK DIRECTLY TO THE READER

WHY I OFFER YOU THIS NEW KIND OF PIPE FOR $5
I'LL TRAIN YOU AT HOME FOR A GOOD JOB IN COMPUTER PROGRAMMING
YOU'VE EARNED IT. NOW ENJOY IT. [Auto]
CONSIDERING WHAT RUNS THROUGH SEWER PIPES, IT'S A GOOD THING
YOU'LL ONLY HAVE TO TOUCH OURS ONCE
BABY TEETH HAVE SPECIAL NEEDS. PEDIATRICIANS RECOMMEND [Name]
TOOTH AND GUM CLEANER
I GUARANTEE YOU RESULTS WORTH $2,000 IN ONE YEAR
THEY THOUGHT I WAS CRAZY TO SHIP LIVE MAINE LOBSTERS AS FAR AS
1,800 MILES FROM THE OCEAN

33. ADDRESS YOUR HEADLINE TO A SPECIFIC PERSON OR GROUP

TO A $25,000 MAN OR WOMAN WHO WOULD LIKE TO BE MAKING
$50,000
 Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers
TO CAR OWNERS WHO WANT TO CUT GASOLINE BILLS 6 1

FOUR WORDS FOR THE BEST FOREIGN LANGUAGE PROGRAM EVER!

FREE. FAST. FUN. GUARANTEED
TIRED OF THE DAILY GRIND? TRY OUR MONTHLY GRIND. [Coffee]
WE TAKE HEART CASES OTHER HOSPITALS WON'T
ALLERGY SUFFERERS: ASK YOUR DOCTOR FOR AN ALLERGY MEDICINE THAT UNSTUFFS
YOUR NOSE
[Company] IS ALL SET TO HELP YOU MAKE MONEY ON THE INTERNET
YOU TOO CAN BEAT THE MARKET [News Service]
NOBODY MAKES THE NET EASIER THAN [Company]
TWENTY-FIVE MILES. YOU'RE WORKING HARD. BUT COULD YOU BE WORKING HARDER?
[Sports Drink]
YOUR KNEES WILL THANK YOU. [Running Shoes]
GROW UP. NOT OLD.
TO YOUNG MEN AND WOMEN WHO WANT TO GET AHEAD
TO MEN AND WOMEN WHO WANT TO RETIRE ON A GUARANTEED INCOME

This type of headline does two important things. First, it selects

your logical prospects. Second, it offers the prospects a solution to
some problem close to their hearts.
32. HAVE YOUR HEADLINE ASK A QUESTION
WHAT GOOD ARE FREQUENT FLYER PROGRAMS IF THE MILES TAKE OFF BEFORE YOU DO?
DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN GIVE YOUR DOG PERFECT NUTRITION? [Another ad
Substitutes "Cat" for "Dog."]
WILL WE EVER RUN OUT OF TREES? [Forest Products Company]
WOULD YOU BELIEVE THE [Milk] JUG ON THE RIGHT IS 45% LIGHTER?
CAN YOU FIND THE 26 DIFFERENT PRODUCTS FROM AMWAY®
IN THIS PHOTO?
33. OFFER BENEFITS THROUGH FACTS AND FIGURES
[NAME] BURNS UP TO 79% MORE CALORIES THAN ORDINARY TREADMILLS
BECAUSE WE RECYCLE OVER 100 MILLION PLASTIC BOTTLES A YEAR, LANDFILLS CAN BE
FILLED WITH OTHER THINGS. LIKE LAND,
FOR INSTANCE.
FOR $5,000 LESS THAN AN [Auto Model], YOU CAN HAVE A FEATURE THAT'S PRICELESS.
Here's one that combines testimonial with facts and figures:
JOHN TIMMONS TESTED THE $530 [Bicycle Model] AND DECLARED IT PERFECT FOR YOU.

SUMMING UP
6 CHAPTER l
Headline formulas are selling ideas that have worked again and again in
the past and can be expected to continue to get results in the future. For
example, the formula "Begin your headline with the words 'How to'" will
probably last as long as advertising exists. Unless human nature changes
radically, people will never tire of learning how to do the things they want
to do and how to get the things they want to get.
Another form of headline that will probably never wear out is the
announcement. As long as human beings inhabit this earth, they will be
looking for something new, something different, something better.
Just as the physician uses the same prescription many times with
beneficial effect, just as the civil engineer uses the same formulas again
and again for building bridges, so can the advertising copywriter use
formulas that have worked successfully in the past.
Here is a complete list of the 35 formulas discussed in this chapter.
This list can help you in two ways: (1) as a tool to use when you need a
headline in a hurry; and (2) as a stimulus to spur your imagination toward
the invention of new formulas.

1. Begin your headline with the Tntroducing

2. word
Begin' your headline with the ."
'Announcin
word ' g.
3. Use words that have an announcement
quality.
4. Begin your headline with the 'New."
word '
5. Begin your headline with the 'Now."
word '
6. Begin your headline with the "At last."
words
7. Put a date into your headline.
8. Write your headline in news
style.
9. Feature the price in your
headline.
10. Feature reduced price.
11. Feature a special merchandising offer.

12. Feature an easy-payment plan.

13. Feature a free offer.
14. Offer information of value.
15. Tell a story.
16. Begin your headline with the "How To."
words
17. Begin your headline with the 'How."
word '
18. Begin your headline with the 'Why."
word '
19. Begin your headline with the 'Which."
word '
20. Begin your headline with the "Who else?"
words
21. Begin your headline with the 'Wanted."
word '
22. Begin your headline with the 'This."
word '
 Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers
23. Begin your headline with the 'Because." 6 1
word '
24. Begin your headline with the 'If"
word '
25. Begin your headline with the 'Advice."
word '
26. Use a testimonial-style headline.
27. Offer the reader a test.
28. Use a one-word headline.
29. Use a two-word headline.
30. Use a three-word headline.
31. Warn the reader to delay buying.
32. Let the manufacturer speak directly to the
reader.
33. Address your headline to a specific person or
group
34. Have your headline ask a
question.
35. Offer benefits through facts and figures.

As a profession, advertising is young: as a force, it is as old as the

world. The first four words uttered, "Let there he light," constitute its
character. All nature is vibrant with its impulse.
Bruce Barton
E
arly in Hahn's own advertising career, a supervisor told him that all
successful advertising was based on one or more of three appeals: "Sex,
greed, or fear." Further discussion brought out the expanded explanation
below:
1. Sex/sex appeal. Not just—or even primarily—the physical act, but also
love, affection, friendship.
2. Greed. All the things—physical and emotional—that money can buy.
3. Fear. Fear of losing what you have ... of not gaining what you hope to
achieve ... or both.
4. Duty/honor/professionalism. Not what's in it for me, but what is best
for those I serve—the right medicine, the longest lasting sewer pipes,
the most effective fire engine.
The fourth appeal, that of "duty/honor," is based on Hahn's own
experience promoting a Britannica fire-safety educational film. His
assignment was to test possible sales to fire departments and also test
different premiums to enhance sales. Without having yet heard the term
"telemarketing" (you don't have to know the term to do it!), he began to
telephone a dozen fire chiefs around the country and asked two questions:
■ Would they like to see the film for possible purchase for their safety
education programs? Uniformly, the answer was an enthusiastic
"Yes!"
■ Would their firefighters prefer a large electric popcorn popper or an
excellent set of chef's carving knives as a thank you for reviewing the
film? The first two responses were an immediate, loud, and furious
"DO YOU THINK WE'D USE A FIRE-SAFETY PROGRAM BECAUSE
1
2 CHAPTER l
OF SOME (deleted) POPCORN POPPER!"
Hahn asked no more questions about premiums, but we made
children's safety the promotional feature that helped create a long-term
bestseller for the film's producer.
Note this. ALL four appeals concentrate on what is best for the buyer.
NOT ONE of these appeals mentions what is best for the seller! The most
frequent reason for unsuccessful advertising is advertisers who are so full
of their own accomplishments (the world's best seed!) that they forget to
tell us why we should buy (the world's best lawn!) Much more about this
difference throughout the rest of the book.
Not too long ago, an advertisement like the following usually brought
results:
(Headline) YOU CAN MAKE BIG MONEY EASILY (Illustration of man or woman pointing finger
at reader)
Today the likely attitude of the reader toward such an approach is:
"Who are they trying to kid! I'd probably have to work like hell or try to
sell some useless junk to my relatives and friends at five times their
value."
But this does not mean that you can't use an old standby such as the
money appeal. People are as eager as ever to make money. It's our
advertisements that had to change. For legal as well as business reasons,
they had to become more believable and definitely more honest. In
advertising, as exemplified by Figure 6.1, an ounce of belief is worth a
pound of half-belief!
Here are some much more believable money headlines for today:
HOW A MAN OR WOMAN OF 40 CAN PLAN TO RETIRE IN 1 5 YEARS
(Stock Fund)
Note the word "plan" in this headline. Remove it and the advertiser
has guaranteed results.
TO THE MAN OR WOMAN WHO WANTS TO BE INDEPENDENT IN THE NEXT FIVE
YEARS
(Trade school, MBA program, legal school, etc.)
A STORY OF SPARE TIME AND EXTRA CASH (Computer training, part time employment
service, etc.)
Finding the Right Appeal 3

Figure 6.1: To tell the truth. No other advertising is regulated and

monitored as closely as the financial market's. Yet good copywriting and
design still find their way. The bold headline asks the question in every
investor's mind. The subhead offers a possible answer without promising
what it can't deliver. Text and illustration expand the free offer, with the
800 number stated twice, just in case the reader no longer has letters on a
push-button phone. With everything done right, no wonder this became
one of the top Smith Barney lead-generating ads in 1995!
There is no element in an advertisement more important than the
appeal—the reason you give the reader for buying. If this statement
seems to clash with the previous emphasis on the headline, remember
that the headline and the appeal are one and the same. In successful ads,
the appeal is almost always expressed in the headline.
4 CHAPTER l
EFFECTIVE APPEALS
Here are some appeals that continue to increase sales:

■ Make more money

■ Save money
■ Retirement security
■ Better health now
■ Health care security
■ Security in old age
■ Advance in profession or trade
■ Prestige
■ Enjoyment
■ Easier chores
■ Gain more leisure
■ Comfort
■ Reduce fat
■ Freedom from worry
Other effective appeals are:
The desire to be one of the "in" group. This appeal sells everything
from clothing to CDs to what to eat and where to eat it.
The average person's desire for a bargain is another powerful appeal
used by discount chains, department stores, supermarkets, and
practically every other retailer—from bargain glasses (Buy one, get the
second pair FREE!) to luxury automobiles ("Would you believe around
$30,000?")
The desire to be popular, to attract attention, sells everything from
cosmetics, bathing suits, and shaving cream to sports-team jackets, ski-
ing, and off-the-road bicycles.
The desire to outshine our neighbors—and let them know it!—is an
appeal that sells pricey private schools, luxury automobiles, expensive
boats, luxurious homes, landscape gardening, fancy swimming pools, and
so on. Unlike most other appeals, this one is often best implied rather
than spoken.
The money appeal, one of the most effective of all, can be employed
in a number of ways. For example, a clothing manufacturer found that of
all the appeals they tried, the most effective was "Wear these high-grade
clothes and you can command a better income." In a 1980s campaign, a
publisher of business books found that their most effective appeal was,
"Eight books that can help you make more money." (NOT "will" help ... can
help.) Books that got the most coupon and telephone orders were then
given large individual ads for just those titles. Thus, the multibook ads
Finding the Right Appeal 5
were not only successful in themselves, but also became successful low-
cost tests for what sold in different media. Insurance companies, banks,
investment plans, stockbrokers, and many others all use the money appeal
in one way or another.

PROOF OF THE IMPORTANCE OF THE APPEAL

The importance of the appeal used in advertising was brought
forcibly to my attention by the following experiment. I had prepared 11
magazine full-page ads for a certain client in one year's time and analyzed
the coupon returns from a test point of view. Here is the way the coupon
returns looked:
''tisement Replies
A 218
B 666
C 240
D 191
E 502
F 511
G 263
H 550
I 867
J 194
K 210
I then arranged these advertisements in order of merit, as follows (the
poorest advertisement is listed first and the best one last):
rtisement Replies
D (poorest) 191
J 194
K 210
A 218
C 240
G 263
E 502
F 511
H 550
B 666
I (best) 867

Notice that the foregoing 11 advertisements fall into two distinct

groups:
The following six The following five advertis
advertise
ments brought 263 coupon ments brought 502 coupone-
6 CHAPTER l
returns or returns or more:
less:
Advertiseme Replies Advertisement Replies
nt
D 191 E 502
J 194 F 511
K 210 H 550
A 218 B 666
C 240 I 867
G 263
Group Group
1. 2.

Further analysis revealed this important point: Every advertisement

in Group 2—the successful group—had a certain strong, specific appeal
expressed in the headline of the advertisement. No advertisement in
Group 1—the unsuccessful group—had this appeal expressed in the
headline. In other words, the five successful advertisements, without
exception, had a definite quality in common. That quality was a certain
appeal around which the headlines were built. The headlines of the
unsuccessful advertisements were based on several entirely different
appeals. Note this: The unsuccessful headlines were not written without a
strong appeal, but it was the wrong appeal for that product and that
audience. TESTING told us which appeal would work, and it continued to
work for several years thereafter.

WHAT TO LEARN FROM YOUR HEADLINE ANALYSIS

This analysis pointed to the following logical conclusions:
1. That the appeal around which an advertisement is built is vitally
important.
2. That in order to be effective, the successful appeal must be featured
in the headline. To get the appeal into the copy is not enough. Some
of the unsuccessful advertisements had it in the copy.
One other significant point about this analysis is that Advertisement
G, the best of the unsuccessful group, had the result-getting appeal
moderately displayed in a subheading. Think of what it might have done,
if it had been in both!
This method of analyzing a series of advertisements almost always
brings out one or more significant points. It is an easy method to follow.
Simply take a set of proofs and mark in the comer of each proof the
number of replies or the amount of sales brought in by that advertise-
ment. Then lay the proofs in a row in order of merit and study the adver-
tisements to see what quality the most successful advertisements have in
common. But don't just look at them; make a checklist like the one below
and document everything that is different, or remains the same, ad by ad:
Finding the Right Appeal 7
■ Headline/Subheads. Appeal. Wording. Size. Placement.
■ Illustration(s). Subject. Size. Style. Placement.
■ Lay out/Colors. Any overall difference between winner(s) and loser
(s).
■ Copy. Amount. Type size and style.
■ Offer. Including how to order or purchase.
■ Size. Size in relation to the page on which ad appears.
» Medium. Name. Type. Daily, weekly, monthly.
■ Placement. Where ad ran in relation to medium as a whole.

You will find that the successful advertisements usually possess one
or more definite qualities that the unsuccessful ones do not have. For
example, the successful advertisements may all have long copy, whereas
the unsuccessful advertisements may have short copy, or vice versa. Or
the successful advertisements may all have a certain type of illustration
that is lacking in the others. The important thing is that once you have
discovered the result-getting quality, you can work on it to make it even
better and use it to the fullest possible extent in future advertisements.
BE YOUR OWN GUINEA PIG

One way to realize the importance of getting the right appeal is to con-
sider the effect on yourself of two advertisements for the same product or
service. For example, suppose the following two advertisements for
toothpaste were shown to you:
Ad No. 1: More people buy A's Toothpaste than any
other toothpaste in the world
Ad No. 2: B's Toothpaste comes in a specially patented
tube, the cap of which is fastened to the tube and
cannot be lost
It is obvious that Ad No. 1 contains the stronger appeal. Logic tells
you that if more people buy A's Toothpaste than any other in the world, it
must be superior. The other advertisement devotes too much emphasis to
a minor point.
Now suppose the advertisement that tells you A's Toothpaste is the
largest seller is a carelessly prepared advertisement—poor selection of
type, no illustration, no use of color, just black and white. Suppose the
advertisement telling you about the cap that cannot be lost is a handsome
four-color job with an expensive painting for an illustration. Would you
alter your decision? Probably not. The basic appeal would sway you more
than the manner in which the appeal was presented.
But now make a small change in Ad No. 2. Have a cap that never has
to be twisted off, but flips open effortlessly If you aim that ad at older men
and women who often have difficulty grasping smaller objects, will Ad No.
1 still be the winner? The result now is not nearly as obvious and the way
8 CHAPTER l
to find out is to t e s t . . . t e s t . . . TEST!
Suppose two advertisements for business schools were presented to
you. The first advertisement tells you how this particular business course
helps you to make more money. It gives specific examples of men and
women who have made more money by taking the course. It tells what
their incomes were before they took the course and what their present
incomes are.
The second advertisement speaks in general terms about the value of
business training. It fails to give you specific facts and figures and proof of
results.
Wouldn't you be much more apt to be swayed by the first adver-
tisement—the advertisement that tells you exactly how much more money
was made by the men and women who took the course? And again,
wouldn't the facts the advertisement gave you be more important than the
manner in which the facts were presented?
The layout, the illustration, and the style of type wouldn't have nearly
as much effect on you as what the advertisement said. The point of all this
is that what an advertisement says is more important than how it is said.
Note this: Your clients or employers are just as likely to insist on
using the second version as agreeing to the first. To give yourself a better
chance of winning here without a fight, do the following:
■ When multiple examples of possible ads (or other promotions) are
being considered, ALWAYS give management decision makers a
strong recommendation on which one to run. This is your expertise.
It's why you are getting paid. Earn it!
■ NEVER show management decision makers your proposed ads in
"rough"; that is, in a doodle-appearing version. Advertising pro-
fessionals can visualize what this will turn into. Others can't!
■ NEVER show a decision-maker proposed ads that are not equally
"finished"; that is, not equally handsome in appearance.
■ NEVER present ads that are not equally well edited. If different ver-
sions use different linguistic styles, tell why before they are read.
■ If only one ad can be run and management insists it be the version
you consider a sure loser, suggest that "we" use an " A / B Split"
(covered in Chapter 18) to guarantee the approach. If management
proves to be right, congratulate them. If you were right, don't men-
tion it, unless you are asked.
IDEAS THAT SOUND GOOD VERSUS IDEAS THAT ARE GOOD
Another point: Appeals that sound good when described to a client or
employer are not always the most effective appeals that can be used.
Clever, tricky ideas often sound fine when described in a conference room.
But usually some simple, basic, plain-as-the-nose-on-your-face idea will sell
more goods.
A nationally advertised business school published an advertisement
with this headline:
Finding the Right Appeal 9
LETTERS WIVES DON'T WRITE TO THEIR UNSUCCESSFUL HUSBANDS
The advertisement featured the following beautifully written letter.
Dear Fred:
Tomorrow is our eighth wedding anniversary. Haven't the years flown by!
How carefree we were, how hopefully we started out just eight years ago!
You were going to work so hard and get ahead so fast, remember?
You have worked hard. I've seen the tired, worried lines in your face that
prove it. And I've worked hard, too, since the children came—worked to
make the same old salary enough for the four of us, worked to make one
dollar carry the burden of two.
Understand, dear, I'm not complaining. I'm not thinking about me—I'm
thinking about you. Often I've wondered, lying awake at night, why some of
the men we know have gone ahead while you haven't—men who haven't any
more brains and aren't half as nice as you. Remember that first
disappointment when Joe Edwards was made assistant to the president? You
wanted that promotion, and you were ahead of Joe. But they told you that he
had the all-around training you lacked.
Dearest, it's gone on a long time now. You come home tired at night, and
there are bills to pay, and we have a scene, and you say you "simply must
make more money"—and then you never seem to do anything about it. Can't
something be done? I want to help you succeed while we are still young. Isn't
there a way?
Your loving wife, Helen
This advertisement brought more praise from advertising profes-
sionals than any business-school advertisement in years. Ad pros who read
it exclaimed, "Wonderful!" Yet the advertisement was an unqualified
failure. The coupon returns failed to come in. Unsuccessful husbands
didn't want another lecture from their wives—even in a beautifully written
letter.
Highly praised advertisements are not always selling advertisements.
Another type of copy that testing has shown to be ineffective is copy
that talks in general terms and fails to get to the point, like this ad for an
investment plan:
EVERYONE IS ENTITLED TO FUN IN LIFE.
Everyone is entitled to the things that make the world worth living in.
And yet thousands of people with perfectly normal incomes think of the good things
as luxuries they can't afford.
This advertisement rambled on in this strain for several paragraphs.
Finally, the reader was given a few facts. A revision in advertising
approach started the copy off by telling the facts right away. Result:
Increased inquiries and sales.

APPEALS THAT CREATED ILL WILL

Some attempted appeals not only fail to sell a product; they actually create
ill will for the advertiser.
10 CHAPTER l
A friend once said, "Have you seen the (product) ad that shows a fat,
grinning male face? It's perfectly round, with a silly ogling grin. I hate that
face! It's so unnecessarily ugly."
A woman complained about a slogan seemingly aimed at her, but that
she didn't understand. "That slogan is meaningless to me," she said.
"Every time I see it, it annoys me."
Another friend described a point-of-sale display card that bothered
him. It was an advertisement for a household insect repellent showing a
picture of a woman smiling and winking one eye. The caption was "I'm
wise, are you?" "That makes absolutely no sense to me," remarked my
friend. "What is it supposed to mean?"
Experiences of this kind indicate that people actually feel resentment
toward advertisements they don't understand. They become positively
annoyed at slogans and captions whose meaning is not instantly clear.
Note this: A few complaints can crop up about any advertisement. So
don't panic, but don't ignore them. Rather:
■ Use them to trigger a check on advertising results.
■ Determine how widespread the ill will is. If sales are good, will you
lose more than you gain by a change?
The reverse of the ill-will feeling is also true. Advertisements that
seem good to the readers and actually do sell them create a friendly feel-
ing toward the advertiser.
A friendly feeling toward an advertising campaign is not always
enough, however, to make the customer buy the product. An artist told me
how much she admired a certain toothpaste's campaign—especially an
advertisement that showed the old Greek temples on the Acropolis
crumbling away. A line was drawn through the base of the temples and
nearby appeared the slogan "Guard the Danger Line." "What kind of
toothpaste do you use?" I asked. With a laugh, she mentioned a different
brand!
People often have two reactions to advertisements—the conscious and
the unconscious. The conscious judgment is their reaction to its visual or
verbal impact. The unconscious judgment or real judgment comes to the
surface when they go into a store to buy. There is no better test of an
advertisement than whether or not it actually sells the product! In fact, it
is the only true way of determining if your advertisement works.
In regard to the aforementioned slogan that my friend disliked, it
might be argued that the very fact that she noticed it, even though unfa-
vorably, was a point in its favor. It might be argued that the slogans she
didn't notice and the advertisements she didn't remember, either favorably
or unfavorably, were the bad advertisements. A famous copywriter once
said, "The greatest crime advertising can commit is to remain unnoticed."
The importance of noticeability is illustrated by a story told the editor
by A1 May, the buyer of children's toys for a major Chicago-area retail
chain. When Hahn asked him how he had selected an astonishingly ugly
Finding the Right Appeal 11
doll that became the year's bestseller, he said:
When I select dolls for our stores, I find that I can divide them into
three
classes. First, those that produce a strong favorable impression on
me.
Second, those that produce a bad effect on me—that seem actually
ugly.
Third, those that do not affect me much one way or the other.
I always buy the dolls that have a strong effect on me. I buy the dolls that seem to
me either beautiful or just the opposite. I have learned over the years that not
only the beautiful dolls, but those that seem actually ugly will always be sure to
attract both children's and adults' eyes.

The dolls I never buy are the ones that don't affect me one way or the other. I
have found that those dolls don't sell.

What is true of dolls is equally true of children's clothing and

women's dresses ... of book covers and breakfast cereal boxes ... of
practically anything and everything from 39tf stick pens to $39,000 autos.
If it isn't noticed, how is it supposed to sell?

THE SPECIFIC APPEAL VERSUS THE GENERAL APPEAL

A dealer in used cars decided to stimulate his business with newspaper
advertising. He ran some institutional advertisements with headlines such
as:
BETTER AUTOMOBILE VALUES

LONG LIFE AT LOW COST

The advertisements were beautifully laid out, with borders and
carefully selected type. But the results were poor. Only a few customers
came to the showroom. Said the automobile dealer, "The ads looked like
winners, but actually they were flops."
New copy was tried—copy featuring specific car bargains and naming
the make, the year, and actual prices. The advertisements were set like
the mail order advertisements in successful catalogs. Results were
immediate. By actual count, three times as many customers answered the
ads.
This experience is typical. It is just one more indication that elegant
language and a handsome layout do not, in themselves, make a good
advertisement. What you say is more important than how you say it.
In Chapter 18, there are detailed instructions for discovering suc-
cessful appeals. When, after testing, you have found a successful appeal,
you can use many variations of it. For example, a financial advertiser
tested a number of appeals and found that an advertisement with this
headline brought the best results:
GET RID OF MONEY WORRIES FOR GOOD
12 CHAPTER l
Similar advertisements were then prepared with headlines that
contained variations of the same basic appeal. Here are the headlines:
HOW TO END MONEY WORRIES THIS PLAN HAS HELPED THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE TO END MONEY
WORRIES HERE'S A WONDERFUL WAY TO END MONEY WORRIES YOU CAN LAUGH AT MONEY WORRIES
IF YOU FOLLOW THIS PLAN

These similar advertisements all brought excellent results.

The technique of finding and using a successful appeal can be
summed up in four basic steps as follows:
1. Have a reason—not just a "feeling"—for choosing the appeals you are
going to use.
2. Test a number of different sales appeals.
3. Determine the winning appeal by an analysis of results.
4. Cash in on the winning appeal by featuring it in all your advertising,
whether it be space advertising, broadcast commercials, direct mail,
or billboards.
This method of finding the best appeal has brought success to the
world's greatest advertisers. It can do the same for you.

Let your light so shine that men may know your good works.
The Bible

E
xcluding elected and appointed public office holders from our con-
sideration, three groups of people whose job it is to appeal to the public
are: (1) professional entertainers, (2) sales persons, (3) advertising
Finding the Right Appeal 13
copywriters.
Entertainers have a definite advantage over copywriters. Take the
case of a supper club comedienne. She tells a joke to the audience. The
audience either laughs or remains silent. If the audience laughs, its
laughter can be measured. It is either a perfunctory laugh, or a moderate
laugh, or a side-splitting laugh. The point is that the comedienne knows
exactly how well her joke has gone across. If she puts on her act a dozen
times a week, she gets a dozen chances every week to test the reaction of
the public. She can alter the manner in which she tells her jokes. No
matter what she does she gets an immediate judgment of her efforts
direct from the people she is trying to please.
In the case of the salesman, the prospect he is trying to sell sits or
stands a few feet from him. The salesman can study the prospect's facial
expression. He can listen carefully to what the prospect says. He can get
a good idea of how well his sales effort is going by, noting not only the
facial expression, but other body language. He can vary the sales talk at
any moment in order to suit a negative reaction or special conditions. The
important thing is that he gets an accurate judgment of his selling effort
directly from the person he is trying to sell.
Now consider the case of the copywriters working on institutional
and much other advertising that has no built-in method of measuring
response. They write what they believe to be an excellent advertisement.
In many cases it is one of a series. Weeks later, or perhaps months later,
the advertisement appears in a publication or in a broadcast commercial.
Depending on what is being advertised, perhaps a few dealers comment
on it. Perhaps a few FAXes or e-mail are sent by consumers. Is the adver-
tisement a good one or a bad one? Who knows? The product continues to
sell, so evidently the advertisement didn't do any actual harm to the
business!
Perhaps sales are up. Did the advertisement cause the increase? Who
knows? It is more likely that the entire series of advertisements caused
the increase. But who can be sure of even that? Maybe the credit belongs
to the sales force. Or maybe it's just a seasonal rise in the business. Or
maybe some unknown condition is causing an increased demand. The
point is that no matter whether sales are up or sales are down, it is
difficult to tell, except in a general way, over a period of years, whether
the advertising had much or little effect.
There are many other factors besides the advertising that have a
bearing on sales. All we really know definitely is that a number of com-
panies, such as the makers of Wrigley's Gum, Ivory Soap, and Campbell's
Soup, who have advertised persistently for years, have built up big
businesses.
WHY THE COPYWRITERS' JOB IS DIFFERENT
What has all this to do with the writers of advertising copy? It means that
the copywriters' job is different from the jobs of the entertainer and the
salesperson. The copywriters lack close and intimate touch with their
14 CHAPTER l
audience.
This means that the writers of nonresponse advertising have a dif-
ficult job or an easy job, depending on their point of view. If they are con-
scientious workers and want to prepare advertising that will have a def-
inite effect on sales, their job is difficult. They lack the quick reaction of
customers to guide their efforts into the proper channels.
If, on the other hand, copywriters are merely interested in preparing
some advertising to get an okay from an employer or client, their job may
be relatively easy. They can sometimes go on for years writing what may
be mediocre copy. The client is never called on by a delegation from the
public saying, "We think your ads lack selling power."
COPYWRITERS WHO HAVE TO PRODUCE SALES RESULTS
There are whole classes of copywriters who are not offered the choice of
writing either sales-producing copy or mediocre copy. Among these are
the writers of department store and mail-order advertisements. These
people must write advertisements that sell, or lose their jobs. The result of
this situation is shown by the following bit of conversation that took place
between a mail-order layout artist and writer:
"I hope we have a rainy Sunday/' said the mail order copywriter to the
layout artist.
The other laughed. "Why? Do you have a new ad running in a Sunday
paper?"
"Yes," was the reply. "We're starting that new encyclopedia campaign,
and I want the first ad to bring a lot of inquiries and orders."
Why do mail-order professionals like rainy Sundays? Because they
know by past experience that rain increases coupon and 800-number
returns. When the weather is rainy, more people stay at home and read
the newspapers. They may watch more TV or play more video games, but
newspaper and magazines get their share, and naturally they read the
advertisements too.
Now consider the case of an institutional, or any other, advertisement
on which results can not—or simply are not—checked. Does the writer or
artist ever say, "I hope it rains on Sunday! I want a lot of people to read
my ad." The chances are that no such remark will be made. Yet their
advertisement is affected by the weather just as much as a mailorder
advertisement is.
A mail-order advertisement has to do a complete selling job. And
results can and almost always will be checked. Therefore everybody works
hard to make it good. The copywriter works her head off to make the copy
pull. The layout man employs every trick he knows to make the
advertisement stand out on the page. The account executive or in-house
advertising director has a lot to say about how the advertisement should
look and how the copy should read. When they've all agreed, the employer
or client sees the results and approves or takes a hand—criticizing,
making changes, or simply offering suggestions. None of them wants to
Finding the Right Appeal 15
leave a single stone unturned to make the advertisement sell. No wonder
mail-order advertising is so efficient. Everybody works so hard to make it
good. They even pray for rain!
Note this: Pay special attention to the word "how" in the sentence
above about "how copy should read." Like a classic definition of poetry,
"the right words in the right place," advertising, too, is as dependent on
where the words go as what they say. For instance, in the following head,
would it be equally clear as a single line, or if divided between
"advertising" and "disasters"?

HOW NONSCIENTIFIC ADVERTISING DISASTERS HAPPEN

Consider the attitude of a group of advertising people preparing an
institutional campaign. Of course, there is much discussion as to what
the advertisements should say and how they will look. But often this
discussion is theoretical. It is often based on personal preference rather
than on proven research and/or past experience as to what pays and what
doesn't pay. The reason is that when advertising results are not tested in
some manner, it is difficult to know just what does work best.
Here is a typical example of how the themes of all too many unsci-
entific advertising campaigns are sometimes arrived at. A friend told me
that his father was starting a travel agency in Philadelphia. He wanted to
know how best he could advertise so that the people of Philadelphia would
learn about his travel agency and be persuaded to go there to get
information and tickets for travel abroad.
Having worked on several travel accounts, I was able to make a few
suggestions. But I noticed that my friend was hardly listening. He was
anxious for me to get through talking so that he could tell me his BIG
IDEA for advertising the travel agency.
Here's what he said: "Do you remember that Christmas card our class
got out during our freshman year at college? It had a beautiful picture of a
square-rigged sailing ship on it. I think we could get up a wonderful
advertisement built around an illustration like that. We could make it very
artistic, very distinctive. We might be able to work in the initial letters
P.T.A. (Philadelphia Travel Agency) on one of the sails of the ship."
My friend spent a long time describing just how he thought the
advertisement should look and how the picture of the sailing ship should
be printed in colors on high-grade paper.
I realized that he didn't want my advice at all. All he wanted me to do
was to agree with him and say, "Yes. I'm an advertising professional and I
think that's a wonderful idea."
He said he thought that his sailing ship picture would look fine in
important national magazines. I told him that since practically everyone
flew abroad, they might not connect a vacation to a sailing ship. And if he
ran his advertisement in magazines with national circulation, the only
readers who would do him any good were the tiny fraction who lived in
16 CHAPTER l
the Philadelphia area.
My objections seemed to annoy him. All the suggestions I made
seemed to annoy him too. He didn't want suggestions or objections, he
wanted me to get enthusiastic about his BIG IDEA.
This is undoubtedly an extreme case—though not the only such in my
experience. Yet it contains an example of how clients and employers
sometimes force their advertising professionals to prepare poor adver-
tising. The client has a pet idea he insists on using. This idea may be
based on something no more substantial than a decades-old Christmas
card design.
HOW MAIL-ORDER ADVERTISERS ASSURE RESULTS
In certain types of advertising, you can be as absurd as you want to be,
and—providing you do not check results—nobody can ever prove that the
advertising isn't good. There are no direct returns to indicate the interest
or lack of interest on the part of the public.
Now let's look at the mail-order situation again. Suppose the client
suggests some ineffective advertising stunt. The advertising-agency
account executive will use every possible means to sell the client off the
idea. She knows in advance that the advertisements won't pull, and she
would rather incur the client's displeasure now than incur it later by
running nonpulling advertisements. Experience tells her that once the
advertisement flops, the client will forget it was his insistence on using his
idea.
In the same way, if either the account executive or the copywriter
should suggest an idea that is obviously poor, the client will probably kill
it.
This means that every mail-order advertisement has to pass the
judgment of three severe critics—the copywriter, the advertising manager
or account executive, and the client. If an idea is poor, it will be killed by
one of these three. No persuasive flow of theories and arguments can sell
it.
What is the result of this situation? Open any publication and you can
see it. In 1997, as was true in 1955, there is still an abundance of
expensive decorations, the meaningless headlines, the type that is hard to
read, the would-be "clever" copy, the big blocks of white space. But in
1997, as in 1955, all these belong to the untested advertisements.
Now look at print media or direct response advertisements such as
Figure 7.1. What do you see? Bold-type headlines that stick out. Text set in
type that is easy to read. Copy that is full of effective sales points. And no
white space, because mail-order advertisers proved many years ago that
white space is too often wasted space.
The following quotation, from John W. Blake's booklet "Blind
Advertising Expenditure," brings out some important points in regard to
tested advertising versus untested advertising:
General advertising (as distinguished from "mail order") is frequently
a structure of opinion and unproven theories. A structure without a
Finding the Right Appeal 17
foundation. These theories are so deeply rooted that they have become gospel.
The reasoning that brings about the spending of millions sounds logical enough.
The selling propaganda that induces this investment is powerfully persuasive, and
let us hasten to say, honestly believed in.
If your advertising is answered by the public, you should test not only the media,
but also the individual insertions. Then keep a careful record of results. You will
soon be convinced. Simple enough, isn't it? But gravely important to your
pocketbook. If you have no way of testing your advertising, if your publicity is
designed to send the public to retail stores, you owe it to your money, and to your
business, to inject if possible some kind of "reply copy" into your advertising: a
"send for free circular" appeal. Big money should never be spent on advertising
until it has been tested.

Listen to the testimony of another champion of tested advertising:

When an experienced mail order man was called in to help lift the sales curve for
a certain soft drink, he announced, after investigation: "The difficulty lies in the
fact that the loyal customers are chiefly older people. Old-time products often
suffer because friends die. To replace them one must win a new generation of
friends. The solution is simple: Sampling . . . New triers . . . New buyers . . .
Coupons. Let everything center around coupon costs, and proven ads that pay."
On this basis a complete plan was built and carried out. Coupon costs dropped
from $1.20 each to 65?!, then to 55?! and later to 24?:. The $1.20 coupons offered
either a full-size bottle of Soft Drink Extracts at 30?! or a capping outfit at $2.00.
The later coupons offered a free sample, sufficient to make eight bottles of the
beverage. The expensive coupons came from full pages in color. The low-cost
coupons came largely from quarter- pages. In the year of the expensive coupons
the net earnings were $224,854.18. In the year of the 24?: coupons (three years
later) the net earnings were $889,701.60.
All advertisements for this product were tested carefully and then for several
seasons subjected to a "breeding" process. Eventually all the high-cost ads were
pruned away and good payers were encouraged. Thus the final schedule was built
of 15 tested ads. For another example of an effective sampling promotion—and a
great two-word headline— see Figure 7.2.
18 CHAPTER l

Figure 7.1: Yes you can\ Yes. You can protect your use of FREE SPEECH as your two-
word headline. Just incorporate it into an "SM" (Service Mark) icon design to deliver an
attention-grabbing message that makes no attempt to be anything other than hard-sell
direct response. Direct mail produced a 10 percent response rate, (four times the sales-
per-dollar of TV), an on-line telemarketing follow-up close rate of 87 percent, and
transformed a costly promotion fulfillment into a revenue-generating proposition.

Figure 7.2: If you can write a better headline . . . The promotion used full-
color inserts in scores of the nation's largest circulation newspapers—
metropolitan, regional, and suburban ... billboards in major target markets
... radio (here left to your imagination). . . and sampling at major dog and
cat shows. Integrated marketing resulted in increased sell through at the
store level, as well as customer pull where the product was not in stock.
Proof that very clever can work very well!
Finding the Right Appeal 19

A SIMPLE, INEXPENSIVE PRE-ADVERTISING TEST FOR

HIGH-TRAFFIC BUSINESSES
The advertising manager of a large bank described a method of testing
bank advertisements. Briefly stated, the method consists of preparing
advertisements in poster form and displaying them in bank lobbies and
windows. Observers are stationed to keep a record of (1) the number of
people who pass the posters and (2) the number of people who are suf-
ficiently attracted by the posters to stop and read them. For lobby posters,
flyers can be distributed in pocket-racks to give more information and to
help track response. It is an ingenious method of testing that can be
applied by almost any high-traffic businesses such as department stores,
supermarkets, and so forth.
The accuracy of the tests was indicated by the fact that tests of the
same groups of advertisements in four different branches of the bank
brought almost identical results.
The bank's advertising manager, reporting on the test in a trade
magazine, said:
The wide difference in the attention-value of various advertising ideas
is often surprising. Of two savings advertisements displayed under
similar circumstances, one stopped nine persons out of 1,000 and the
other thirty- four. Of two proposed trust advertisements, one stopped
six persons and the other sixteen. Some advertisements have stopped
one person out of every ten. Some have attracted so small a number
as to have practically no value from an advertising standpoint.
Others, little different in character, have won large audiences.
One of the lessons we have learned from our display of proposed
advertisements is the increased attention-value that a national figure
adds to the copy. For a time we tested posters featuring statements of
prominent people about thrift and saving. Included in the list were
several U.S. presidents and other famous men. All of these attracted
attention far above the average. As a test, we removed the name and
photograph of one of the famous men from a poster and used only the
words he had spoken, not mentioning him as the author. The
attention-value dropped 50 percent.
A question that may be asked regarding all our tests is this: Is
attention- value the only test of the effectiveness of the
advertisement? Of course not. It is, nevertheless, fundamental.
If an advertisement fails to attract attention, there is little else that
can be said for it. It may be dignified, beautiful, and filled with sales
arguments, but if not read, these good qualities cannot redeem it. The
sales appeal of an advertisement, its general effectiveness, timeliness,
and matters of that sort are qualities to be discussed after the fact
has been established that the advertisement can attract attention. A test of
attention-value may show that the advertisement with the best sales copy attracts
so few readers as to be almost worthless. Another ad, almost as strong in sales
arguments, reaches many. A third, at the top in the number of readers, is weak in
its presentation of a product or service. In making a choice between these
20 CHAPTER l
advertisements, all of the facts that combine to make a successful advertisement
must be considered. Attention-value is one of the most important of these factors.

THE PHILOSOPHY OF "AS IF"

One of the popular nineteenth-century German philosophies, "The
Philosophy of 'As If,'" can be applied to advertising as well as to meta-
physics. Prepare every advertisement "as if" it were a mail-order ad. Apply
to your advertisements everything that can be learned about what works
best to sell the type of product or service you will advertise. Use a mail-
order-type headline, mail-order art, mail-order copy, mailorder typography,
and most important, give the readers a personal reason to do what you
want them to do. The chances are, more often than not, your "as if" will
turn into a reality!

THE LESSONS OF THIS CHAPTER

1. You should find some way to test your advertisements so that you will
know for sure which ads are effective and which are not effective.
Chapter 18 tells you how to do this.
2. If you are looking for advertising ideas to use in your campaign, don't
imitate the fancy art and the fancy language that you will find in the
untested ads whose sales results cannot be measured. Instead,
emulate and borrow from the ads whose sales are measured daily—
namely, the mail-order ads, the direct-response ads, the direct-
marketing ads, the department store ads. Give special attention to the
tested ads that are repeated again and again. These are the ads that
are paying off in sales. These are the ads that contain ideas that will
pay off for you.

Advertise, or the chances are that the sheriff will do it for you.
Phineas T. Barnum
O
ne day, the son of a longtime friend came to my office to tell me
about a new biomedical stock. He was just an ordinary young man
—not much personality. And he was not an experienced salesman.
Yet he gave me one of the most compelling sales talks I ever
heard.
What made him so compelling? His enthusiasm. He believed
in that stock completely and implicitly. He had bought it himself.
He had sold it to his friends. He was absolutely convinced that it
would double in value in three months.
Later I found out that the founder of the biomedical company
had talked to groups of young stockbrokers for hours, telling
them what wonderful possibilities the new research had and how
they were doing their clients a favor by selling them stock in the
start-up company. This process of selling the sales staff was kept
up until all the young men and women there were armed with an
enthusiasm more compelling than years of training in the
techniques of salesmanship.
Enthusiasm is just as vital in advertising as in selling.
Perhaps that is the reason that for many copywriters, the
toughest part of an advertisement to write is the beginning. It is
hard to get started.
An advertising copywriter, working in an agency in which the
creative director supplied a headline and layout concept, told me,
"When I sit down to write an ad, I find myself doodling on a little

2
1
22 CHAPTER l

pad. I chew the end of my pencil, or I glance at the blank screen. I

gaze out of the window. I go to the water cooler for a drink of
water.
"Finally I write a few lines of copy. Then I stare at the layout
for a long time. I wonder if the headline isn't all wrong. I read
over the copy I have written. I cross out a word. I rewrite a
sentence.
"Later I change it back to the way it was originally. No way I
fix it seems right."
WHY IT'S SO HARD TO GET STARTED
Why do so many copywriters have difficulty in getting started?
There are three reasons:
1. The human brain is like an automobile engine. It works best
when it is hot. When you sit down to write an advertisement,
your brain is cold. This means that sitting down and writing
a beginning for an advertisement is like trying to drive an
automobile up a steep hill with a cold engine.
2. The experienced copywriter knows that the most important
part of an advertisement is the beginning. The opening
sentences must be good or readers will lose interest.
3. In agencies in which a proposed headline or layout—or both
— come from a creative director, the copywriter may find
them a hindrance rather than a help. What she can do about
that depends entirely on the agency or in-house department
for which she works. Some consider alternative suggestions.
Many insist that copywriters use what they are given. The
best writers welcome the challenge, waiting for the day
when they become creative directors themselves.

HOW TO OVERCOME "COLD BRAIN" STARTUPS

There are several ways to overcome this difficulty. One method is
to say to yourself, "I'm going to write some copy about this
product, though I'll probably not use the first few paragraphs
that I write. But I'll start writing anyway, and before long I'll
write some copy that can be used as a beginning."
Another method is to say to yourself, "I'm not going to start
writing this advertisement at the beginning. I'll start in the
middle. Then, after I've warmed up by writing for a while, I'll
read over my copy, pick out the best paragraph, and use it or
rework it as my beginning. I'll keep on doing that at least three
or four more times as I'm writing and the beginning will take
How to Put Enthusiasm Into Advertising Copy 23
care of itself."
An experienced copywriter revealed, "I don't like to write.
But I do like to edit copy and I'm exceptionally good at that, so I
write fast and get my thoughts down on paper or on the screen.
After that, the job is merely editing."
Do advertising writers ever get "written out"? Of course they do.
One frustrated copywriter said to his new assistant, "We need a
Christmas ad for the new Simplex Cellular Phone. I'm sure glad
you're here to help me with it. I've been batting out Simplex once
a month for the past three years and am just about written out.
"I've written ads about using them for business ... to impress
the bosses . . . and just for pleasure . . . about parents giving
them to their kids ... a wife giving one to her husband or husband
to wife . . . kids giving one to Dad ... brother giving one to sister
and vice versa ... every possible combination. I don't know what
else to do and they want an original idea each and every month!"
Imagine writing 36 ads—or six, for that matter—without ever
applying the principles of scientific testing to learn what effect
your messages have on sales! No wonder the writer was written
out.
The problem of what to do when you are written out is a
difficult one. Some copywriters solve it by changing jobs every
few years.
A less drastic method of getting your mind out of the rut is
to forget the "average" customer, that imaginary man or woman
to whom you have been writing all these years. Write copy as if
you were writing a letter to some friends. Say to yourself, "I've
just bought this Widget and it is great. I think Jim and Betty
would like to know about it. I'm going to write and tell them
about it."
Here is a letter an association president wrote to a friend,
then realized it should also go to members of the association.
Read it and see if you don't feel the quality of enthusiasm in the
letter:
Dear Association Member:
You would have been thrilled to have been with me in Montreal
on Friday.
Montreal, as you know, is the site of your convention in
September. I was there attending a Board of Governors meeting
of your Association.
The Queen Elizabeth Hotel, headquarters for the convention, is
something to write home about. It was designed specifically to
handle conventions—all of the convention facilities (registration,
meeting rooms, exhibits, bar, etc.) are on one floor. The hotel is
lovely. Beautiful rooms, excellent elevator service, and probably
24 CHAPTER l

the best hotel food you'll find anywhere. We had eggs Benedict for
the Board breakfast (at 8 a.m.!) and they were wonderful. Rooms
are moderately priced, as are valet, laundry, room service, etc.
This Montreal steering committee has really knocked itself out.
I'm enclosing a copy of the almost-completed program. Real meat
in it for both the little guy and the big guy.
Airline arrivals will get their hotel key at the airport (at least
those who have the foresight to make their hotel reservations at
the Queen Elizabeth early). Both United and Air Canada have
agreed to “Special Delivery Flights" from all main U.S. entry
points. Luggage will receive special Queen Elizabeth stickers and
be shipped immediately to the hotel. Identification buttons will be
supplied immediately. Rail travelers will arrive directly beneath
the hotel—and lucky auto travelers will discover something
unique—free parking at the QE. Imagine!
Your spouse (and if you don't have one, it would almost be
worth it for this trip alone) will get a real treat from the
Laurentian Mountain tour including a luncheon and Christian Dior
style show.
The resort where this activity will take place has a unique feature
— a grass roof that is kept "mowed" by two goats. You'd have to
see it to believe it. Some of the Board members have actually seen
the goats in action!
Chrysler Automotive was staging an exhibit the day we were
there and 25,000—count 'em—were accommodated in the exhibit
area. The beauty of the exhibit area is its accessibility to the
meeting rooms, ball room, and registration. It will be the finest
deal our convention exhibitors have ever had. We have also
appointed a special broker to lessen the problems of shipping
exhibit materials through customs.
The program (as you'll see by the attached) is loaded with tal-
ent but will leave enough free time to visit some of Montreal's
wonderful French restaurants. Incidentally, the program will be
printed in both French and English to give it a truly bilingual
flavor. Montreal is second only to Paris for French-speaking
inhabitants. This alone adds a flavor you just can't afford to miss.
I was so excited after I left Montreal that I thought I'd best tell
you about it immediately. If you miss a reservation at the Queen
Elizabeth, you're going to miss some of the enjoyment of the con-
vention. Better make that reservation today—I did.
Sincerely,
Bob

The author of this letter wrote it while he was in an

enthusiastic frame of mind. He had experienced something he
was excited about and he wrote about it right away. He didn't give
his enthusiasm a chance to cool off. That is one secret of
enthusiastic writing. If you are excited about something, grab a
How to Put Enthusiasm Into Advertising Copy 25
pencil or sit at your keyboard and get your excitement down on
paper immediately.
The same applies in talking. If you have just witnessed an
exciting event or experienced an exciting idea and you tell
somebody about it that same day your description is much more
effective than if you wait a week and tell about it after the details
and the excitement have departed from your mind.
An analogous approach works in preparing a presentation
and in public speaking. Always carry with you—yes, even to the
bathroom—a note pad or small hand-held dictation device.
Capture the inspiration that has been working in your
subconscious before it can disappear. If you wait, all too often
others interrupt with their own enthusiastic ideas and yours is
lost, even though you know it was better.
Here are some samples of advertising copy that have the
quality of enthusiasm:
1. COPY FOR A RETIREMENT INCOME PLAN
This message is addressed to the man or woman who wants to take
things easy some day. It tells how you can provide for yourself in later
years a guaranteed income you cannot outlive.

It doesn't matter whether your present income is large or merely

average. If you follow this plan you will someday have an income upon
which to retire.

The plan calls for the deposit of only a few dollars each month—the
exact amount depending on your age. The minute you make your first
deposit, your biggest money worries begin to disappear. Even if you
should become totally disabled, you would not need to worry. Your
payments would be made by us out of a special fund provided for that
purpose.

And not only that. We would mail you a check every month during the
entire time of your disability, even if that disability should continue for
many, many years—the remainder of your natural life.

2. COPY FOR A NEWSPAPER SUBSCRIPTION

"A few years ago I was going broke. High prices and taxes were getting
me down. I had to have more money or reduce my standard of living.

"So I sent for a Trial Subscription to the Wall Street Journal. I heeded
its warnings. I cashed in on the ideas it gave me for increasing my
income and cutting expenses. I got the money I needed. And then I
began to forge ahead. Last year my income was up 40%. Believe me,
reading the Journal every day is a wonderful get ahead plan. Now I am
really living!"

This experience is typical. The Journal is a wonderful aid to the profes-

sional man and woman. It is valuable to the owner of a small business.
26 CHAPTER l

It can be of priceless benefit to the young person who wants to win

advancement.
3. COPY FOR BOXES OF FRUIT SENT BY EXPRESS
Right now as I write this, it is late September, and out here in this
beautiful valley our Royal Riviera Pears are hanging like great pendants
from those 40-year-old trees. We'll have to watch them like new babies
from now until picking time—not a leaf must touch them toward the
last. Trained men will pick them gently with gloved hands and lay them
carefully in padded trays. They'll be individually wrapped in tissue and
nestled in cushion packing, and sent in handsome gift boxes
lithographed in colors, to reach you—or your friends—firm and
beautiful, ready to ripen in your home to their full delicious flavor. I
envy you your first taste of Royal Riviera Pears, dripping with sweet
liquid sunshine.

4. COPY FOR A FAT-REDUCING REMEDY

In 10 days I'll reduce your weight 5 to 10 pounds. I don't care how stout
you are. I don't care how many times you have tried to reduce and
failed. My amazing new method will make your excess fat melt away
like magic—give you a normal, youthful figure—make you slim,
buoyant, energetic, as Nature intended you to be, or the treatment
won't cost you a single penny!
No starving—no exercising—no drugs—no external agencies—no
mechanical appliances. You just follow my instructions for a few days
until your excess pounds disappear, until the scales tell you that you
weigh exactly what you should. This method is so simple that anyone
can understand how it works. It is so logical, so sensible that the
moment you hear about it you will know instinctively that it works.
Send no money; we will bill you later. Merely send me your name and
address and we will send you "How to Reduce" at the special low price.
If at the end of ten days you are not completely satisfied—if you do not
lose weight rapidly and easily—then simply tell me so on the invoice
and you will owe nothing. WRITE TODAY.

HOW TO AVOID MENTAL HAZARDS

One mental hazard that discourages writers is the knowledge
that their copy will be judged by a number of critics including:

■ The copy chief

■ The account executive
■ The advertising manager
■ The sales manager
■ The president
27 CHAPTER l

■ And—the writer is convinced—several strangers who happen

to be passing in the street as the ad is being considered.
Each critic has his or her own idea about copy. Trying to
please them all is like trying to hit a dozen different targets with a
single arrow. If you want to write enthusiastic copy, you must
banish critics from your mind entirely. Ignore them. Forget them.
Write the way you want to write ... the way good advertising must
be written.
And write fast. Get steamed up. Make your copy sizzle. Put
all the power of a runaway locomotive into it. Later go over it in
cold blood and cut out the things your critics will object to. In this
way you can produce copy that is both lively and acceptable. If
you write with the prejudices and preferences of other people
uppermost in your mind, you will produce copy as correct as a
school child's essay, but utterly lifeless.

OVERCOMING OTHER MENTAL HAZARDS

Our enthusiastic copy plan helps to overcome two other mental
hazards:
1. The things you are not allowed to say about the article you
are selling.
2. The things you must say as a matter of advertising policy.
Put these things completely out of your head. Don't sit down
to write copy with a string of "musts" and "can'ts" dangling in
your mind.
Use a process of self-hypnotism. Say to yourself that Smiths
Toothpaste is the best in the world—that there is no other
toothpaste like it. It can produce wonderful results in a short
time.
Get excited! Get worked up! Tell yourself that you have the
biggest piece of news to tell since man walked on the moon.
Remember that enthusiasm is as contagious as measles. It
spreads from speaker to listener, from writer to reader.
Then start to write. Write fast. Write furiously Write as if you
had to catch a plane. Write as if you had to put all your thoughts
on paper in the next five minutes or lose them forever.
Perhaps your first few paragraphs will sound impossible.
Never mind. Keep on writing. Somewhere, somehow, you will
produce real selling copy. Some of the things you write will work
on the emotions of your readers in subtle ways that are perhaps
unknown to yourself. Unconsciously you will produce little
touches that arouse and stir your readers and listeners to action.
ACTION—that's the vital quality that emotional copy
possesses and that "reason why" copy lacks. "Reason why" copy
appeals to the readers' intelligence and makes them nod their
heads in agreement with you. But emotional copy goes deeper. It
gets into those portions of the brain where love and hate and fear
and desire are.
Both types of copy are important. Skillfully combine the two
and you will make the readers get up out of their chairs and start
for the store.
One more word about enthusiastic copy: Everybody knows
that you can tame a wild horse and make the animal useful. But it
is impossible to put life into a dead horse. The same is true of
advertising copy. An advertisement that has been pounded out in
the white heat of enthusiasm can be tamed and made effective.
But it is impossible to put life into dead copy.
And remember that the polishing and rewriting you do
afterwards are extremely important. Anatole France claimed that
he rewrote every paragraph five times. The illustrious French
author said, "The first four versions of my writing sound as if
anybody had written it. Only after a fifth rewriting does it begin
to sound like Anatole France."

Advertising is to business ivhat steam is to machinery—the great

propelling power.
Thomas Macauley

2
8
How to Put Enthusiasm Into Advertising Copy 29

O
ne of the earliest definitions of writing advertising copy was
“Salesmanship in print" (see Figure 9.1). Today six or seven
generations of definitions later, many copywriters forget that
“salesmanship" is still the critical element in what they do. Too
many miss their chance to make a sale by starting with a few
introductory remarks that lose the reader's interest instead of
holding it.
Imagine for a moment that you are interested in buying a TV
set. You see a good-looking set in a store window. You walk into
the store to look at it. Uppermost in your mind are these
questions: How many channels will it receive? What is the quality
of its reception? Does it have true stereo sound? And, of course,
H O W much does it cost?
T

Suppose a clerk should walk up to you and say, "This is an

age of beauty . . . charm . . . style." Wouldn't you be
flabbergasted? Wouldn't you suspect that there was something
wrong with him? After all, you're there to see about buying a
television set. Yet the statement "This is an age of beauty . . .
charm . . . style," are the exact words of the opening paragraph of
a $16,000 magazine advertisement for a television set. This sort
of copy is not exceptional. You have become accustomed to it
because you see so much of it.
Millions of pages have been turned with their millions of ads
left unread because of first paragraphs like the following:
The modem woman demands something more than comfort and
utility in the appointments of her home. She is a devotee of style
and beauty. She knows color and design. Her taste is cultivated
and refined. She is informed, detests spuriousness, and expects
authentic value for her money.
 How to Write the First Paragraph 30

Figure 9.1: Just so they spell the name right! Since the initiation of this
campaign, occupancy rate of the New York Helmsley Hotels went from
under 50 percent to over 90 percent in seven months. Say what you will,
she inspires a helluva ad campaign!
This bit of philosophy is the first paragraph of a four-color
page in a national magazine. Can you guess what product is
being advertised? Can you guess what the product will do for
you? No. There is no hint, no clue. The copy tells nothing, sells
nothing. It is merely a barrier between the readers and what
they want to know.
 How to Write the First Paragraph 31

Often a copy chief or advertising manager can improve a

writer's copy simply by omitting the opening sentences or
opening paragraphs that the writer used in the first draft.
"Begin here," says the copy chief, and points to a sentence or
paragraph halfway down the page.
Did you ever see a baseball pitcher warming up before he
gets into the game? He needs to swing his arms a bit and
throw some practice pitches before he is at his best. And he
needs an experienced pitching coach to tell him when he's
really ready. Some writers are the same way. They need to
write a few sentences, few paragraphs, or an entire first draft
before they really get hot. A copy chief can help a copywriter
by pointing out the exact spot in the copy where the writer
begins to say something worthwhile.
If you don't have an advertising manager or a copy chief
to guide your efforts, put your copy aside for a day or two and
then come back to it with a fresh mind. Perhaps you will find a
sentence or a paragraph that will make a more exciting
beginning than the one you used originally. More likely you
will find that you can simply omit your original beginning
without losing any of the essential ideas in your ad. Morton
Levin, the advertising director for a successful syndicated
book catalog, told his writers to begin every description with
"This is a story about" or "This is a book about," then eliminate
that phrase from the description. Thus, "This is a book about
how to write better advertising copy than you ever thought
possible" became "How to write better advertising copy .. .
etc." It still works. Every time.

A CLASSIC LESSON FROM READER S DIGEST

Some years ago I picked up an issue of Reader's Digest and
copied down the first sentence of every article in the magazine
—35 articles in all. I wanted to find out how the editors of the
world's largest circulating publication handle the problem of
holding the reader's interest after that interest has been
sparked by the title of an article. Many article writers as well
as ad writers face this same problem, namely how do you hold
them after you've stopped them with your headline or picture?
My experiment with a single issue of Reader's Digest was
so revealing that I went through a number of issues. I found
the same successful formulas repeated again and again. Some
32 CHAPTER l

of these formulas are just as appropriate for ad writing as they

are for article writing. Here they are:
1. INTERRUPTING IDEAS
A number of articles begin with a sentence that can be
described as an "interrupting idea." What is an interrupting
idea? It is a startling statement or a novel twist that breaks
through the boredom barrier that often exists in the mind of
the reader. For example, an article on deodorizers entitled "It
Makes Bad Air Good," began this way:
The hit of the annual Chemical Show held in New York City a
few months ago was a pair of skunks housed in a plastic cage.
Here are the opening sentences of four more articles that
use the technique of the interrupting idea:
As you sit quietly reading these lines, a whirl of activity is
taking place in your body.
While we humans think that penguins look and act like people,
there's sobering evidence that they think of us as just big
penguins.
Pleasing your tongue has lately become the chief concern of
the world's largest industry.
Each day hundreds of thousands of harried young mothers
thumb nervously through a dog-eared, oatmeal-splattered
volume—one of the most extraordinary ever published.

2. THE SHOCKER

Closely related to the interrupting idea is an opening that is

even more striking and can be described as "the shocker."
Here are examples:
A Frenchman is rarely seen drunk, but France has the highest
rate of alcoholism in the world.
This morning in the United States 8,000 more mouths
demanded to be fed than yesterday morning.
I used to think that women who did nothing but have babies
were stupid creatures.
There are some crimes a racketeer never commits unless he
sees his lawyer first.
3. NEWS
Another type of opening popular with editors is the news
opening. Here are four examples:
There is a new committee in Washington.
 How to Write the First Paragraph 33

In the past two years an exciting era of exploration has opened up.
A billion-dollar industrial empire has sprung suddenly into
existence along the banks of the Mississippi River.
Something exciting and heartening is happening on the
American college campus these days.

4. PREVIEW

Occasionally used as an article opener is a sentence giving you

a brief preview of the article. Examples:
Port-au-Prince, capital of the Republic of Haiti, is the busiest,
noisiest, most colorful city in the Caribbean.
Until about 15 years ago lapanese beetles seemed unstoppable.
Intelligently analyzed, our dreams can give us significant
insights into our problems and our relationships with others.

5. QUOTATION
Here is the opening of an article on word power that appeals
to everyone who works with words:
Daniel Webster said: "If all my possessions and powers were
taken from me with one exception, I would choose to keep the
power of words, because by them I would recover the rest."

6. STORY
I have not yet told you the most interesting discovery of all:
Over half of the Reader's Digest articles begin with a story. As
you know, Reader's Digest is not a fiction magazine. It is a
nonfiction magazine. Yet more than half of the pieces begin
with an anecdote or a narrative of some kind. If you will tie
this fact up with the fact that many of the most famous ads
ever written are in the form of stories, you will have something
for ad writers to ponder.
Below are examples of story openings:
One night last autumn a visitor in New York noticed lights
burning in a church on lower Fifth Avenue.
The time was one A.M., the place a police station on Chicago's
South Side.
On a sunny afternoon in Portland, Ore., I was driving my
daughter to her weekly swimming lesson.
From the gallery of the Montreal Neurological Institute's main
operating room, I recently witnessed a seven-hour brain
operation.
At the Eastman Chemical Products laboratories in Kingsport,
34 CHAPTER l

Tenn., a technician using an eye-dropper placed one drop of a

newly developed adhesive on the end of a two-inch steel rod.
Last summer Columbia University student Alexander H. Ladd,
a young man from a well-to-do Boston suburb, spent his
vacation working as a grease monkey in a Mobil gas station.
When I dropped my letter into the mailbox, I felt exactly as if
I'd tossed a bottled note into the ocean.
As dawn broke over Boston Harbor one day last fall, the
tugboat Irene-Mae waddled out into the Atlantic on a strange
mission.
On a Saturday not long ago, a physician flying in a sport plane
over Springfield, 111., lifted a pocket radio receiver to his ear,
pressed a button and in a moment heard a woman say: "One-
five-four code three, emergency. Location 20."
For 34 tension-drenched minutes on August 8, nine test-crew
airmen expected to die at any instant.
Here are some of the things you should notice about the
various Reader's Digest openings:
1. They are fact-packed.
2. They are telegraphic.
3. They are specific.
4. They have few adjectives.
5. They arouse curiosity.
The next time you write an opening for an ad, see if you
can use an interrupting idea, or a shocker, or a news item, or
a story.

ANOTHER FORMULA
If none of the preceding methods fits the ad you are writing—
if you can't find an appropriate story or an interrupting idea—
you can fall back on the simplest formula of all, namely: You
can write a first paragraph that continues the same thought
you expressed in your teaser or headline. For a direct mail
example of this same technique, see Figure 9.2.
Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers 6 1

Figure 9.2: The power of the

writ- | ten word ... by four to one\

\ Printing inside the envelope

brings home the one/two punch
of the message even as the con-
tents are removed. A personal-
ized letter promises answers,
with an 800-number to start
getting them right now—from
the person signing the note. No
wonder favorable response to
telemarketing follow-up proved
four times more likely immedi-
ately after the mailing was
received than to a
telemarketing cold call! Winner,
1995 CADM Tempo Award.
36 CHAPTER l
 Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers 6 1

For example, if you stop a reader with a headline about

house paint, you can be sure of at least one thing about that
reader: He wants more information about house paint. You will
not lose him as long as you continue to give him what he wants.
If you want proof of the effectiveness of this method, just
glance at the opening paragraphs of a few mail order ads.
These ads pay for themselves in actual sales.
Here is the first paragraph of a mail order advertisement
selling a remedy for a speech defect. The ad has a one-word
headline that selects the proper audience. Notice how the first
paragraph continues the thought expressed in the headline:
[Headline] STAMMERING
[1st Paragraph] You can be quickly cured if you stammer. Send
$2.95 for a 288-page cloth bound book on Stammering and
Stuttering. It tells how I cured myself after Stammering and
Stuttering for 20 years.

A humble subject. A small advertisement. But the first

paragraph contains more real selling punch than many a full-
page advertisement.
Notice how this piano school gets down to brass tacks in
the following first paragraph:
[Headline] LEARN PIANO
[1st Paragraph] Play popular song hits perfectly. Hum the tune,
play it by ear. No teacher—self-instruction. No tedious ding-
dong daily practice. lust 20 brief, entertaining lessons, easily
mastered.

Read the following telegraphic first paragraph taken from

an advertisement for a Civil Service school. In addition to
continuing the headline theme, this paragraph gets seven sales
arguments into three short sentences.
[Headline] GOV'T JOBS
[1st Paragraph] Why worry about strikes, lay-offs, hard times?
Get a Government job. Increased salaries, steady work, travel,
good pay.
Now, for the sake of contrast, read the following first
paragraph:
The ideal toward which great engineers work is not only
mechanical perfection, but automatic maintenance of such
perfection. Every great mechanical advance in automobile
38 CHAPTER l

construction has led us toward a freer enjoyment of automobile

convenience.
 CHAPTER 4

This is the sort of copy you would engrave on the

cornerstone of the Mammoth Motors Building. Or it might do
for an epitaph to be chiseled on the tombstone of a deceased
manufacturer. But it is neither of these. It is the first paragraph
of a full-page advertisement in a national magazine. The
product is an automobile oiling system.
Later in the advertisement these excellent arguments
appear:
■ Each bearing receives only the amount of oil it needs at
any given speed.
■ No alternate periods of dryness or overflow.
■ No waste.
■ The System is out of the way, under the dash.
■ Needs oil only once in every 12,000 miles.
Why couldn't these facts appear earlier? Thousands more
people would have seen them.
Here is an example of correct handling. Notice how the
first paragraph of this insurance ad continues the headline
theme:
[Headline] HOW TO PROVIDE A
RETIREMENT INCOME FOR
YOURSELF
[1st Paragraph] This new Retirement Income Plan makes it
possible for you to retire at any age you wish, 55, 60, or 65. You
may provide for yourself a monthly income of $1,500, $2,000, or
more.

When you catch readers with a certain idea as expressed in

the headline, you may lose them if you introduce a totally
different idea in the first paragraph.
Based on mail-order experience, here are three simple
rules for writing a good first paragraph.

1. Make it short. A long first paragraph discourages readers

before they get started.
2. Continue the thought expressed in the headline.
3. State in a few words the most important benefit or benefits
readers derive from buying your product. Benefits!
How to Write the First
Paragraph

Benefits! Benefits! What do I get? What will it do for me?

That's what people want to know. That's what makes them
read advertisements.
A READER'S DIGEST LESSON FOR TODAY
The lessons to be learned from the style of Reader's Digest are
as applicable today as when Caples first taught them. What
follows are the titles and opening sentences of the articles in
the Reader's Digest of July 1995. Note how many reflect one of
the six formulas discovered by Caples:
■ Interrupting Ideas
■ The Shocker
■ News
■ Preview
■ Quotation
■ Story
Note, too, how often the first sentence immediately gets to
the point with a date ... a time ... a fact that expands on the
title; that is, on the article "headline." Reader's Digest editors,
like smart advertisers, do not change what works until they
come up with something better. "Humor in Uniform" has
appeared monthly since World War II. "It Pays to Enrich Your
Word Power" was studied by your editor each month when he
was learning English years ago. Nothing is changed by
Reader's Digest "just because we're tired of it." Everything is
subject to change when it no longer works.

25 TITLES AND OPENING SENTENCES FOR TODAY

1. "One Hot Afternoon in July"
There are certain days when we feel our lives change
profoundly, days we remember for a lifetime.
2. "A Toast to Marshmallows"
It was a touching display of reverence.
3. "Evidence that Does Not Lie"
Nineteen-year-old Lori Ann Auker was battling her
How to Write the First
Paragraph

estranged husband, Robert, over custody of their child.

 How to Write the First Paragraph 1

4. "Can You Trust Those Polls?"

This past January, as the new Congress went into session,
an opinion poll publicized by the U.S. Agency for
International Development (AID) triggered headlines around
the country.
5. "Jamel's Way Out"
Three-year-old Jamel Oeser-Sweat sat huddled with his
mother, Jeanne, on the tattered sofa.
6. "A Coyote Named Promise"
Early one morning, I awoke to an unearthly cry—like the
sobs of a thousand demons.
7. "That's Outrageous"
First-grade public-school teacher [name] has been charged
with scamming New York City out of more than $35,000 in
welfare benefits.
8. "Encounter with a Great White"
Had I noticed a couple of significant local events, I might
not have been so eager to get into the water that day off
Cannon Beach, one of Oregon's best surfing spots.
9. "Can Yeltsin Survive?"
With the Russian economy in deep trouble and warfare
continuing in the breakaway region of Chechnya, Russian
President Boris N. Yeltsin faces political challenges on all
sides.
10. "The White Sneakers"
Dr. Beatrice Engstrand burst into the intensive-care unit at
New York City Metropolitan Hospital and surveyed the
scene.
11. "Where Wealth Begins"
Why do some countries prosper while others remain poor?
12. "Seduced in the Supermarket"
During a typical 30-minute shopping trip down the aisle of
an average American supermarket, about 30,000 products
vie for your attention.
13. "A Very Tall Tale"
2 CHAPTER l

From time to time people ask if it bothers me that I'm bald,

and I can honestly say it does not.
14. "The Recycling Myth"
One-third of U.S. households make a ritual of sorting their
garbage for curb-side-recycling programs.
15. "I'll Blow Your Head Off!"
At precisely 9:00 A.M., Jason McEnanev sank into a lecture
hall seat at the University of New York in Albany ready for
his Greek history class.
16. "O Romeo, O, Like, Wow"
At the end of the school year, my 14-year-old daughter's
English class tackled Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet and
she had to give an oral report.
17. "Is Your Seafood Safe?"
Ty Minton's hands were so weak he couldn't even lift a
glass of milk to his lips.
18. "Faster than a Speeding Bullet"
It was a dream assignment—to build a wild stallion of an
airplane, so advanced and awesome that it could intimidate
America's enemies and maybe even some of our friends.
19. "Ace that Job Interview"
Job interviewing is a minefield.
20. "The 10 Sexual Senses"
Because they so keenly want to share everything, lovers
imagine that their senses are identical—that they feel the
same silk, see the same rainbow, smell the same rose, taste
the same wine, hear the same tango.
21. "Take $2000 and Call Me In the Morning"
A new disease is stalking my home state.
22. "A Boy and His Cat"
I'm not sure how he got to my clinic.
23. "Heroes for Today"
The tiny village of Fishkill, N.Y., has never commemorated
the nation's birthday with fireworks or a brassy parade.
 How to Write the First Paragraph 3

24. "Most Important Thing You Can Do for Your Child"

Jim Trelease has devoted the past 16 years to promoting
what he considers the best-kept secret in education today
25. "Deliver Us from Evil"
Daylight was fading in the village when the old woman
came to the back door of the house.

With public sentiment nothing can fail, without it nothing can succeed.
Abraham Lincoln

T
his chapter discusses 19 different kinds of copy for space ads
and direct mail and gives examples of each. Not all of these
kinds of copy are recommended. Three are listed as
questionable, and three are definitely not recommended.
Let us first discuss some 13 types of copy that are
recommended.
1. STRAIGHTFORWARD COPY
This type of copy presents the advertiser's story in a simple,
logical manner. It is devoid of style or rhetoric. It merely states
the facts in the most understandable way possible. For
example:
4 CHAPTER l

PERSONALIZED STATIONERY
100-high quality, special-size bond note sheets and 100
envelopes are neatly imprinted with any three-line address you
designate. Carefully packed and mailed prepaid to your home
for three dollars.
2. STORY COPY
This copy starts off with a human-interest situation. Then
comes a story, the moral of which is "Buy the product
advertised." While this kind of "story opening" might be
considered too old-fashioned to use in print advertising today,
notice how closely it matches in spirit many health and beauty
TV commercials of the 1990s:
"HE TOLD ME I WAS THE GIRL OF HIS DREAMS AND I THOUGHT HE MEANT IT"
"He said I was wonderful, the one girl he'd been hoping to meet ever
since college. And then everything seemed to go wrong.
"My cousin introduced us when we went to our high school
reunion. George was wonderful—fun to talk with, good looking,
a great education, a great job, even a good dancer."
DIFFERENT AT NOON
"When he asked me to go swimming the next day, it seemed like
love at first s i g h t . . . for both of us!
"We talked for a while on the beach. But the more we talked, the
less interested he seemed to become in our conversation . . . and
in me.
"When he told me he had to leave early, I knew something had
changed, but I had no idea what.
"George," I said, "I thought you really liked me. What happened?"
"His answer gave me the shock of my life."

RIGHT IN THE FACE

"Last night, at the dance," he said, "you looked absolutely great.
But now, in the sunlight, you have just about the worst
complexion I've ever seen! Can't you do anything about that?"
Things like this happen all the time. But it does not have to
happen to you! True beauty is impossible without a smooth
running system, the kind you have with . . .

1. "You AND Me" Copy

In the "You and Me" style of copy, the manufacturer speaks
directly to the customer, usually in a chatty, friendly way, just as
a good salesperson talks to a potential customer. Here is an
 How to Write the First Paragraph 5

example taken from a direct mail letter selling mackerel fillets

by mail order:
FISH HAS BEEN MY SPECIALTY ALL MY LIFE
In my many years as a fisherman, I've seen a lot of fish. Starting
with the days when I used to go "mackerelling" in my father's
vessel, I've loved the sea and the good things that come out of it.
I remember how father carefully selected the best fish of the
catch to take home. I've never forgotten his "fisherman's test" of
mackerel and codfish. We'd pick the plump ones with meat so fat
and tender they would break apart at the touch of the fork. They
always turned out to be so juicy and sweet—tender as chicken.
The letter continues in this vein for several paragraphs and
then closes with this appeal:
Let Me Send You These Fillets Now—On Approval
Just check and sign the enclosed card and mail it, and I'll send
you a pail containing 10 Fillets of fat, fall-caught mackerel, each
sufficient for two or three persons. Season one of these Fillets
and broil to a delicate brown. If you are not fully satisfied that it
is the finest mackerel you ever tasted, send the rest back at my
expense and the trial costs you nothing.

The chatty "fish has been my specialty" type of approach

has proven successful for everything from abalone to yogurt. It
is one of the more difficult styles for the sophisticated
copywriting professional, yet often the easiest for the do-it-
yourself true believer. If you're such a pro, let the client tell you
about the product. Tape the conversation, then transcribe it as
a first draft. Fix any obvious contradictions, add the selling
details, and make it the final draft, too.
2. IMAGINATIVE COPY
In this kind of copy, the copywriter heightens the reader's
interest in the product by describing it in imaginative terms.
For example, a successful mail order advertisement written by
Bruce Barton for a two-year, home- study course in business
described the course as follows:
A WONDERFUL TWO YEARS' TRIP AT FULL PAY— but only men and women with
imagination can take it
About one person in ten will be appealed to by this page. The
other nine will be hard workers, earnest, ambitious in their way,
but to them a coupon is a coupon; a book is a book; a Course is
6 CHAPTER l

a Course.
The one man or woman in ten has imagination.
And imagination rules the world.
Let us put it this way. An automobile is at your door; you are
invited to pack your bag and step in. You will travel to New
York. You will go directly to the office of the president of one of
the biggest banks. You will spend hours with him, and with
other bank presidents. You will not leave these bankers until
you have a thorough understanding of our great banking
system.
When you have finished with them the car will be waiting. It will
take you to the offices of men who direct great selling
organizations.
Their time will be at your disposal.
Through other days the heads of accounting departments will
guide you. On others, men and women who have made their
mark in office management. . . [etc. ... etc.].
The whole journey will occupy two years. It will cost you
nothing in income, for your salary will go right along.

The above is condensed from an ad that brought so many

responses that it was repeated again and again for seven years.
The complete ad is reproduced in Figure 10.1 selected by
Caples as an advertising classic.
 How to Write the First Paragraph 7

Figure 10.1: An Ad That Ran for Seven Years: This ad for a two-year
correspondence course in business training was written by Bruce Barton,
former chairman of BBDO, Inc. The ad brought so many coupon returns
that it was run again and again in magazines and newspapers for seven
years. The coupons were turned over to representatives. General
advertisers sometimes ask, "Is it profitable to repeat a good ad?" Based on
the experience of mail order advertisers, the answer is yes.
8 CHAPTER l

3. FACTUAL COPY
A large number of successful retail ads were compared with a
number of unsuccessful retail ads. The purpose was to discover
what kind of retail copy produces the most sales. Conclusion:
The ads that tell the largest number of facts about the product
are the ads that make the most sales. Stating it briefly: The
more you tell, the more you sell.
Here is an example of successful retail copy. Notice how it
sells by piling one fact on top of another.
ENGINEERS' BOOTS
For you outdoor men who demand the best in boots. Ease into
these comfortable, weather-resistant Wearmasters. Selected
grain leather uppers, oil-tanned to repel water . . . stay flexible
with repeated exposure to moisture. Leather vamp lining wears
longer; gives more comfort across instep. Leather Woodsman's
heel, rubber top lift, distributes weight evenly for better
balance. Double oak leather soles. Steel shank reinforces leather
insole. Outside counter pocket strengthens heel. Top ankle
straps adjust. Goodyear welt construction . . . retains original
boot-shape .. . easy to resole.

For an example of factual, tested, and proven direct mail

selling, see Figure 10.2.
4. FACTS-PLUS-STYLE COPY
Copy that merely imitates the style of some great master of
English prose and omits the selling arguments is of little value.
On the other hand, copy that has style in addition to selling
arguments is acceptable, especially when you are advertising a
high-grade product.
Following are paragraphs taken from an advertisement
stressing the speed obtainable in a Rolls-Royce automobile.
Notice the high speed of the copy. It moves rapidly from
sentence to sentence. It has a style all its own, just as a Rolls-
Royce has. And every paragraph is packed with facts and selling
arguments.
There is not a car made that can measure miles with Rolls-Royce
on a cross-country run. And if the run includes every kind of
road condition, you only add to Rolls-Royce's advantage. For
Rolls-Royce is so vibrationless, so floating-smooth, that it can
take rough roads at speeds you would never think of attempting
 How to Write the First Paragraph 9

in any other car.

Prove that—at the wheel of a Rolls-Royce! You open the throttle

— the scenery takes wings. But where are the rack and rattle
that are speed's running mates in most other cars? Absent! You
can scarcely hear the motor that is hurrying you on. If you didn't
know that the speedometer is as accurate as the finest watch,
you wouldn't believe you were going so fast. Rolls-Royce is so
quiet!
10 CHAPTER l

Figure 10.2: The truth . . . the whole truth. Transforming the FCC full-
disclosure rule into a dynamic selling point, Bell Atlantic's simple two-piece-
plus-envelopes mailing topped the "control," (the best previous response),
to produce a 5 per-
 How to Write the First Paragraph 11

cent return. But that's only half the story. An equally basic follow-up,
12 CHAPTER l

stressing the need to act by a specific date, matched the original for a
combined three-year total of four-million sales ... and still counting!
1 CHAPTER l

5. FORTHRIGHT COPY
Sometimes a writer can increase the believability of an ad by
admitting that there are some weak points as well as strong points
in the proposition she is selling. Here is a classified real-estate ad
that uses this method effectively. For this example, from a time
when Los Altos real estate was considerably less costly, the author
is indebted to advertising consultant Clyde Bedell.
NEGLECTED JR. ESTATE $25,000
Few settings in Los Altos Hills are more beautiful than this full acre.
Here you have orchard land and towering shade oaks. The basically
charming and comfortable home, however, needs loving attention
from a family with the imagination and energy to bring it up to
modem standards. There are 3 good-sized bedrooms, nice bath, sep-
arate dining room, and huge family kitchen—plus breezeway, garage,
and rundown solarium with intriguing possibilities. The Guest House
sags at the seams, but perhaps You can make it livable.
While you're trying, there IS the reward of a relaxing dip in your 16'
x 36' Filtered Paddock Swim Pool. Make no mistake—there's much to
be done here. But the potential is great, and the price downright
tempting, so maybe you should have a look. If you like what you see,
we'll help you to own this picturesque property on terms that suit
you. Palo Alto school district. Obey that impulse and call now for an
appointment.

6. SUPERLATIVE COPY
In this type of copy you step right out and blow your own horn as
loudly as possible. This kind of advertising is effective if you have
the facts to back it up. Here are two examples:
Build a lib rary of classics in replicas of rare bookbindings decorated in 24
Karat Gold
Choose any 3 of the masterworks on this page for only $1 with trial
membership in the International Collectors Library. We make this
extraordinary offer to introduce you to one of the greatest ideas in
publishing history.
The private libraries of the past have bequeathed to us rare book-
bindings of hand-crafted design. Today these originals are found only
in museums and in the home libraries of very wealthy collectors.
Now the International Collectors Library brings you the great
classics of fiction, history, biography, poetry, drama and adven
 Right and Wrong Methods of Writing Copy 1

ture—in authentic period bindings—replicas of the designs on the

priceless originals.
Yours Free . . . Giant New Spring Garden Catalog
Over one hundred great garden ideas. Your first chance to see the
Rose of the Year, plus the new All-American roses and much, much
more.
Golden Gate—brilliant intense yellow, outstanding for cutting. THE
yellow rose for arrangements.
Brand New Hybrid Teas—White masterpiece, with 6-inch blooms so
perfect you'll have to see them to believe them. Here's Heirloom—
pure, clear lilac, one of the rarest colors in the garden world; rich
with fragrance like ripe raspberries.

7. SIGNED COPY
Sometimes the manufacturer himself issues a signed statement
regarding the product or service he is selling. This method was used
by a famous automobile manufacturer to announce a new car. In
another case, a watch manufacturer published an advertisement
that was written and signed by a well-known author.
Following are quotes from an advertisement for World
Magazine. The copy is signed by Norman Cousins, who was the
publisher.
AN OPEN LETTER TO THE READERS OF THE NEW YORK TIMES NORMAN COUSINS TWO DAG
HAMMARSKJOLD PLAZA, NEW YORK, NEW YORK 10017
My purpose in writing is to tell you that my colleagues and I have
decided to launch a new magazine.
Ever since I resigned from the Saturday Review, for reasons you
may know about, I have been thinking and dreaming about the pos-
sibility of starting a magazine that, quite literally, would belong to its
readers and editors.
[There followed 16 paragraphs of description of the forthcoming
magazine.]
We ask no money now. That can come later. What we need right
now is an expression of your interest.
As I said above, in inviting you to join us in what we hope will be
an exciting adventure in ideas, we realize we are asking you to take a
chance on us. We have high hopes of justifying that confidence. The
process begins with the Charter Subscription form below.

Sincerely, Norman
Cousins
2 CHAPTER l

This ad ran three times in The New York Times and brought in
almost four times the cost of the space. Here are some of the
features that made this ad successful: (1) It looks like editorial
material. (2) It is signed by a famous editor, Norman Cousins. (3) It
is written in the "you and me" style, like a letter to a friend. (4) The
name "The New York Times" in the headline gets attention,
especially since the ad appeared in The Times. For a current
example of signed copy, see the long-running campaign shown in
Figure 10.3.
8. TITLE COPY
Over a period of years, mail-order book advertisers have discovered
by trial and error just what titles are most interesting to magazine
and newspaper readers. Titles that do not sell are discarded from
the advertising. Titles that sell in large quantities are retained.
Here are some titles listed in a typical advertisement. Notice what a
world of interest is packed into three or four words. And remember
that these titles were not selected at the whim of the copywriter.
They are the most popular titles—the titles that produced the most
sales.
Take Your Pick of the Books Listed on This Page
What Every Girl Should Know How to History of Rome
Write Short Stories Rhyming How Not to be a Wall-Flower
Dictionary A Book of Riddle Rimes Principles of Electricity
Origin of Human Race How to Argue Novel Discoveries in Science
Logically Dictionary of U.S. Slang Queer Facts About Lost Civilizations
How to Improve Your Conversation How to Tie All Kinds of Knots
Physiology of Sex Life Psychology of Story of Plato's Philosophy
Suicide Common Faults in English Short History of Civil War
Facts You Should Know About Evolution of Sex
History of World War II What Woman Beyond 40 Should
How N.Y. Girls Live
Music Evolution of Marriage Know A Hindu Book of Love
Art of Being Happy Manhood Hints on Etiquette Book of
Facts of Life My 12 Years in a Synonyms Prostitution in the
Monastery Hypnotism Ancient World Puzzle of Personality
Explained Baseball: How to Do We Need Religion?
Play Self-Contradictions of Plain Talks with Husbands and
Bible Evolution Made Plain Wives Is Death
How to Love Develop Sense of Inevitable?
Humor Best Jokes About Doctors
Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers 6 1

Where We
Stand
I!-. Vlvi' Shank' i I'I. i,|. nl \ri.-H. .-
it..! I nu • k «l

Raising the Bar

W .V..
%
If

Stak s tu\
t. been
salistidl
Hith llu
s
'.amc 1
n>
t
liiiwalK
tii.ii
skuulattK
shal
the\
luuI
iwenl v
u us a‘>n

Mr Shankt-r'i m ihis ad uruJ >‘H unpin > i I ihi \ii m.tti I-

edci'aiim ' i it R coisv-.fionikiice is m Hal
AiMre-,»>,!urkWiloMi' Sii.mket aUhc .\M " ' V « V.nut \ W
W^hmsi' ilH »i ». < IWlii Aitvn SfanUr.

Figure 10.3: "Advertising" to think

about. . . and with. Since 1980, the
“Where We Stand" column, by the
President of the American Federation
of Teachers, has appeared in the
Sunday New York Times (and The
4 CHAPTER l

New Republic since 1991). Why pay

advertising rates to run such a
column? Because, according to its
author, to be effective in educating
their students, teachers must also
help educate the public about issues
in education. Much as Mobil does for
a corporate view, Albert Shanker's
column not only raises issues, but
also urges policies and generates
hundreds of weekly responses, pro
and con. That's Scientific Advertising
responses worth thinking about
!

The next time you write a

headline, a subhead, or the title
of a free booklet, try to put into
it the brevity, the simplicity,
and the human interest that are
contained in the titles of these
books.
Compare this 1950s list
with today's nonfiction
selections from The Book of the
Month Club, The Literary
Guild, or the bestsellers in The
New York Times, Time
magazine, and so forth.
Although the titles have
changed, the subject categories
remain the same: sex, religion,
sports, popular psychology and
science, and so on. And just as
the appeal of book categories
has remained constant, so have
the general advertising appeals
Caples discovered and taught
us in his articles and books.
Even the three- and four-word
titles still dominate. Of the 30
hardbound bestsellers listed in
the September 24,1995 New
York Times, 21 have titles of
three words or less.
(Incidentally, Hahn
discovered the power of brevity
when he submitted his own
Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers 6 1

book, cleverly titled A

Handbook for Advertisers
Without the Time or Talent to
Become Creative Geniuses, and
the publisher said: "That is
really clever. We'll call it Do-It-
Yourself Advertising &
Promotion.)

9. TEASER COPY
This copy is a challenge to the
reader. Instead of trying to sell
him, it apparently tries to
discourage him. Perhaps the
effectiveness of this method is
accounted for by its
unusualness. For example, here
is the opening of a teaser
advertisement for a business-
training school.
MEN WHO "KNOW IT ALL"
A
R
E

N
O
T

I
N
V
I
T
E
D

T
O

R
E
A
6 CHAPTER l

T
H
I
S

P
A
G
E
This page is not for the
wise young man who is
perfectly satisfied with
himself and his business
equipment.
This page is a personal
message to the man who
has responsibilities, who
feels secretly that he
ought to be earning
several thousand dollars
more a year, but who
simply lacks the
confidence necessary to
lay hold of one of the
bigger places in business.

10. NEWS PAGE COPY

In this kind of copy, the
advertiser buys space, usually a
page, in newspapers or
magazines. The page is made to
look like typical editorial mat-
ter, with headlines, copy,
pictures, and often including a
regular small ad. The only
difference is that instead of
being written by reporters,
everything is written by a
copywriter with the product
sold just as hard in the "news"
items as in the regular
advertisement.
An advertisement like this,
 Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers 6 1

though it must be clearly

labeled as advertising, is useful
for an occasional variation in a
regular promotion campaign.
But if used too often, it loses its
effectiveness.
A maker of automobile
accessories who used coupons
in his advertising tried a news
page of this type and reported
that coupon returns were three
times as great as the coupon
returns he had previously been
receiving from his regular
advertisements.

11. Competitive Copy

Before the 1980s, practically all
advertising professionals
frowned upon "Competitive
Copy." To show how rapidly and
dramatically the advertising
world has changed, it is the one
category that has been moved
from "Questionable . . . use with
discretion" to "recommended"!
Here is a table of figures
and a paragraph of copy taken
from an automobile tire
advertisement that speaks right
out against its competitors, the
mail-order houses:
COMPARE Our Tire *Special Brand
Construction and Quality Mail Order Tire
MORE Rubber Volume 172 161
cu. in. cu. in.
MORE Weight 16.99 15.73
pounds pounds
MORE Width 4.75 4.74
inches inches
MORE Thickness .627 .578
inch inch
MORE Plies at Tread 6 plies 5 plies
8 CHAPTER l

SAME PRICE (price) (price)

*A "Special Brand" Tire is made by a manufacturer
for distributors such as mail order houses, oil
companies, and others under a name that does not
identify the tire manufacturer to the public, usually
because they build their "first line" tires under their
own name. We put our name on every tire we make.
THREE KINDS OF COPY
TO BE USED WITH
CAUTION
Now we come to three
kinds of copy that are
questionable. These should be
used with caution.
12. Card Copy
Some advertisers use copy so
brief that the entire
advertisement, although it
sometimes occupies full-page
space, could easily be printed
on a business card. For
example, the following full-
page magazine advertisement
contains only 24 words:
BLANK & CO.
Jewelers Silversmiths
Stationers
Diamond Jewelry Noted for Quality
From Generation to Generation
Mail Inquiries Receive Prompt
Attention
Fifth Avenue New York
Other frequent users of
card advertising are the
financial houses, stock brokers,
and so forth, whose
advertisements in the financial
pages of the daily newspapers
consist merely of their name
and address and perhaps a
slogan, all enclosed in a
rectangular box.
This advertising may be
heaven for those who work on
Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers 6 1

it. In fact, it should allow its

authors practically six months'
vacation twice a year. But it
goes against the grain of the
users of tested advertising who
have never been able to get a
profitable volume of sales with
fewer than 200 words.
13. Clever Copy
When copywriters try to be
clever, they are likely to
produce one of the following
results:
1. They may write
advertisements that are
neither clever nor effec-
tive. The headline, in its
attempt to be smart, may
turn out to be obscure and
fail to attract readers. The
few readers who do read
the copy realize that the
copywriter has tried to be
funny and has failed. Such
an advertisement can
actually do harm.
2. They may write an
advertisement that seems
clever to the people who
read it from beginning to
end. However, in view of
the fact
that the headline is usually
tricky rather than a selling
headline, few people
actually do read the entire
advertisement.
3. They may write the rare
advertisement that
contains both cleverness
and salesmanship. The
following clothing
advertising is an example.
10 CHAPTER l

The element that kept this

advertisement from
misfiring is the fact that
the headline attracted a
large number of readers.
[Headline] THIS IS
PROBABLY THE LOWEST
P
R
I
C
E
D

C
L
O
T
H
I
N
G

A
D
V
E
R
T
I
S
E
M
E
N
T

E
V
E
R

P
Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers 6 1

R
I
N
T
E
D
[Subhead] This suit
$9.79—and very seasonable, indeed
[Illustration] [Picture of a
man wrapped in a large white
cotton
sheet]
[Copy] "THIS SUIT"
is really a large white cotton sheet.
It
covers
the
body, it
launde
rs well
—and
it costs
$9.79
Like
any
other
low-
priced
clothin
g, it
has its
disadv
antage
s: it
doesn't
fit, the
style
isn't so
good,
and it
wouldn
't quite
pass at
a
directo
rs'
meetin
g or at
the
12 CHAPTER l

club—
but it
will
keep
you
out of
jail.
ON
THE
OTHE
R
HAND,
if you
do
want
to look
well-
dresse
d and
hold
the
respec
t of
your
busine
ss
associa
tes,
and
look
like
succes
s at a
time
when
succes
s never
meant
more—
pay
the
price
of
good
clothes
.
Copywriters should avoid
the so-called "clever" type of
copy. It is too often a snare and
a delusion. To attempt to write
Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers 6 1

it is playing with fire. The

chances are a hundred to one
against you when you try to be
smart in your advertising. Even
the men and women who are
famous for writing clever
advertisements turn out a large
number of duds. Why not be on
the safe side and stick to selling
copy? The chances are a hun-
dred to one in your favor if you
stick to a straightforward and
simple presentation of the
benefits your product will
confer on the buyer.
16. HUMOROUS COPY
Humorous copy, like clever
copy, should be avoided by 99
copywriters out of 100. Of the
millions of people in the United
States, less than half have a
sense of humor. And those who
do appreciate humor are divid-
ed and subdivided into at least
a dozen different groups. Each
group has a sense of humor of a
different kind. What is funny to
you is likely to be either idiotic
or insulting to many others.
This means that when you
write humorous copy, you limit
your audience to perhaps one
third or sometimes one tenth of
your possible audience.
One of the best-
remembered humorous
campaigns was published years
ago by the makers of Kelly-
Springfield Tires. The ads were
done in cartoon style with a
large picture and a few lines of
copy underneath. Example:
[Illustration] [Picture of
minister and layman in conversation]
14 CHAPTER l

[Copy] "Aren't you

sometimes tempted to swear a little
when you
have tire
trouble,
Parson?"
"Well,
I
might
be, but
you
see I
avoid
tempta
tion by
using
Kelly-
Spring
fields."

THREE KINDS OF COPY

TO AVOID
The following types of copy are

definitely not recommended.

14. POETIC COPY

There is a type of copy so
poetically worded that the chief
impression the reader receives
is, "The person who wrote that
piece is certainly a master
word juggler."
The following
advertisement is an example. In
this ad a copywriter is
attempting to sell his own
services.
DRILLING
against granite with a point of
putty—that's average advertising.
Aiming to pierce, it only
bores. It wallows in a
welter of sugary stul-
Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers 6 1

tiloquence. "Thou say'st

an undisputed thing in
such a solemn way" The
formula of average
advertising is as
unchanging as the jokes in
an after-dinner speech.
Advertising must shave off
its mustache or grow one.
It has looked the same too
long. Advertising needs a
fresh newpoint and a new
penpoint or—
LeDeluge . . . Mr.
S.Y.Z., declared to be the
highest-paid advertising
writer, compresses into
one luminous sentence
what average advertising
looks for without seeing.
Space is too costly to stop
to weigh the fee of
supreme ability.
Arrangements for
retaining Mr. X.Y.Z. may
be initiated through Mr.
A.B.C., Director Cliental
Relations, 100 Park
Avenue, New York.

The above advertisement

appeared only once. Perhaps it
brought so much business that
its author is still busy filling
orders. The opposite
explanation seems more likely,
however, that it brought so
little business that it wasn't
worth repeating.
Following is an
advertisement that was
repeated dozens of times in
business magazines. It must
have pulled or it wouldn't have
been repeated so often. It is
quoted here not as an example
of poor copy, but for the sake of
16 CHAPTER l

contrast.
SALES PROMOTION
$150 to $50,000 Daily
Sales Developed during 28
years for clients by our
direct mail campaigns.
One product a few years
ago was just an idea; this
year $100,000 in orders
booked. Fifty-year-old
concern desired 50
national representatives;
we produced 40 in three
months. 700 dealers in 10
months at $3 each, for
another. Ten years Sales
Promotion Manager
Larkin Co. Submit Sales
problems for free
diagnosis. I-CJ., Buffalo.

15. AFFECTED COPY

There is a type of copy that
sounds as if it were written by a
college sophomore in order to
produce an intense effect on the
reader. This copy depends on
extravagant phrases rather than
on real thought or feeling. Here
is a sample taken from a
jeweler's advertisement for star
sapphires.
NOCTURNE
Star Sapphire ... It is like a
cup of night blue, dazed
with moonlight and soft
shadows, and it bears a
promise of the sky. For in
its depths stir the six arcs
of a veiled silver star . . .
eager to fling their beauty
to the night.

16. UNBELIEVABLE COPY

Copy that strains the credulity
of the intelligent reader is not
Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers 6 1

as effective as it was years ago.

Most of the advertisers who
procured sales through
exaggerated and unbelievable
claims have been reduced to
using 60-line space in a few of
the cheaper publications, or
they have gone out of business
entirely. Here are the first three
paragraphs of a form letter
used at one time by a stock
promotion advertiser:
Dear Friend:
Thousands of people
who have read this letter
have QUICKLY BECOME
RICH! My sincere wish is
that it will produce the
same delightful results for
YOU.
I'm going to write to
you frankly—just as I
would to an old friend—
and give you some
AMAZING FACTS that you
can use to your VERY
GREAT ADVANTAGE.
You know and I know
that the man who can tell
what business conditions
are going to be six
months, a year, or two
years, ahead can make a
FORTUNE out of this
knowledge. That's exactly
what I'm going to tell you.
Yours for
success, lohn
Doe

All of us who prepare

advertising have a
responsibility to the public. The
public places a trust in
advertising, and those who
betray that trust do harm to
18 CHAPTER l

their own profession as well as

to the business of their clients.
Following is a story illustrating
this point.
A life insurance salesman
tried for ten years to sell a man
a policy. One day the prospect
walked into the insurance man's
office with a printed
advertisement for that same
policy in his hand and wanted
to buy it. The advertisement, by
means of printed words, sold
the same thing that the
salesman had for ten years
been trying to sell with spoken
words. The prospect felt a
confidence in the printed
message that he did not feel in
the sales talk.
This belief in printed words
is trained into us from
childhood. We learn from
printed pages that two plus two
equal four and that Columbus
discovered America in 1492.
These things are facts, and dur-
ing the most impressionable
years of our lives, we are
trained to believe what we read.
Advertisers who betray this
confidence do harm. For
example, let us say that a child
aged 12 sees an advertisement
with the headline "Free Roller
Skates . . . Simply mail coupon."
The child fills in and mails the
coupon and immediately begins
to think about the fun he or she
is going to have when he gets
the roller skates. Then comes
the rude awakening. The
youngster receives a letter from
the advertiser stating that if the
child will sell 30 sets of
Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers 6 1

beautiful colored photographs

to friends at a dollar a set and
send in the money, the
manufacturer will send the
roller skates "absolutely free."
Thus is created a skeptic, a
doubter. Twenty years later,
when this individual is in the
market for an automobile, the
automobile advertiser may find
the selling job has been made
more difficult by the misleading
advertisement that jarred the
prospect's confidence years
before.

The pre-eminence of
America in industry
has come largely
through mass
production. Mass
production is only
possible where there
is demand. Mass
demand has been
created almost
entirely through the
development of
advertising.
Calvin Coolidge

TWENTY
WAYS TO
INCREASE
SELLING
POWER OF
COPY
20 CHAPTER l

---------N f
----------------

T
his chapter discusses 20 ways
to increase the selling power of
your advertising. All of these
methods have been tested in
actual practice and have been
found to be effective.

1. USE PRESENT TENSE, SECOND

PERSON
Unless there is a definite
reason to the contrary, you
should write your copy in the
present tense, second person.
Don't say, "A man will feel well
dressed in a Brooks Brothers
suit." Say, "You feel well
dressed in a Brooks Brothers
suit."
Don't say, "People will
enjoy a sense of security when
they use Goodyear Tires." Say,
"You enjoy a sense of security
when you use Goodyear Tires."
Keep hammering at the
reader with—you—you—you.

2. USE SUBHEADS
Practically all mail order
advertisers use three or more
subheads in every full-page
advertisement. Many general
advertisers do the same. There
are two key reasons for this:
1. Subheads tell your story in
brief form to glancers who
don't have time to read
your entire advertisement.
2. Subheads get copy read
that might otherwise not
Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers 6 1

be read. For example

potential customers might
be sufficiently attracted by
your headline to read a
paragraph or two of your
copy, and then turn the
page. But at that moment
an interesting subhead
catches their attention,
and they read further.
22 CHAPTER l

3.
Here are the headline and subheads of a beauty product
advertisement. Notice how the subheads tell a brief story as well
as arouse interest.
What Is the Critical Age of a Woman's Skin?
New York doctor shows how to correct the 4 defects that age your skin.
Why old-style treatments fail.

Headline How pore-deep method acts.

Subhead No. 1 Send $1.00 for booklet, "New Faces for Old."
When setting the price for booklets or similar
Subhead No. 2 offers, charge enough to discourage anything-
for-free responses, yet not so high it loses your
Subhead No. 3
targeted audience. Check for similar offers by
Subhead No. 4 analogous advertisers— noting both "similar"
and "analogous"—and test.. . Test. . . TEST!
4. PUT CAPTIONS UNDER ILLUSTRATIONS
In newspaper articles, you will always find captions printed under
the illustrations. These captions get high readership because they
add to the interest of the illustrations and help to explain their
meaning. In magazines such as Time and Playboy, you will also
find scores of illustrations with captions under them. These
captions, as shown in Figure 11.1 attract and sell to readers.
The point is that people are in the habit of reading the brief
messages that are printed under pictures. This habit dates back to
the reading of school textbooks, which have always had captions
under the illustrations. The advertiser should take advantage of
this habit. Don't run pictures without putting captions under them.
Put a brief selling message or a human-interest message under
every illustration you use. David Ogilvy, in Ogilvy on Advertising,
tells us: "More people read the captions under illustrations than
read the body copy, so never use an illustration without putting a
caption under it. Your caption should include the brand name
and/or the promise."
5. USE A SIMPLE STYLE OF WRITING
Writing nearly a century apart, the English philosopher Herbert
Spencer and the American ad man Roy Durstine give advice every
writer of advertising, regardless of medium, should take to heart.
Copywriters would do themselves a favor by copying the following
passages and keeping them handy. If practical, enlarge them a bit
and put them on the bulletin board in front of your desk. Reread
their message from time to time until it becomes part of your own
Twenty Ways to Increase Selling Power of Copy 23

mental makeup.
24 CHAPTER l
Twenty Ways to Increase Selling Power of Copy 25

Figure 11.1: KISS for SUCCESS! Successful direct-response

advertisers practice the KISS principle of "keep it simple,
stupid" ... or find themselves divorced from customers. Lenox
Collections embraces this advice in illustration, copy, and response.
The free canister is the largest one pictured and shown directly
above the coupon. Coupon copy—shown slightly oversize—
continues to sell the sets' quality (fine porcelain . . . "crafted") and
exclusivity (Not sold in . . . stores). Details of cost and billing
conclude with two FREE bonuses—both canister and display
cabinet. To keep it even simpler, there's no need for credit card
information, just a signature. KISS like this to tell about great trips
to the bank.
26 CHAPTER l

Spencer's Philosophy of Style is not the simplest piece of

writing in the world. Nevertheless, the idea that you should reduce
to a minimum the time it takes the reader to figure out what you
are trying to say is absolutely sound.
Regarding language as an apparatus of symbols for the conveyance
of thought, we may say that, as in a mechanical apparatus, the more
simple and the better arranged its parts, the greater will be the
effect produced.
In either case, whatever force is absorbed by the machine is
deducted from the result. A reader or listener has at each moment
but a limited amount of mental power available. To recognize and
interpret the symbols presented to him requires part of this power;
to arrange and combine the images suggested requires a further
part; and only that part that remains can be used for realizing the
thought conveyed.
Hence, the more time and attention it takes to receive and under-
stand each sentence, the less time and attention can be given to the
contained idea; and the less vividly will that idea be conceived.
Roy Durstine in his book, This Advertising Business, expressed
the same idea, perhaps more potently than Spencer expressed it:
The most important job of an advertisement is to center all the
attention on the merchandise and none on the technique of
presenting it.

6. CHOOSE SIMPLE WORDS

Use short simple words to express your meaning. Educated
readers understand short words just as well as long words, and
everyone else understands short words much better. Even where it
is necessary to substitute three or four short words for one long
word, it is usually wise to do so.
The following advertisement from BBDO, Inc. makes the point
as well today as when it was first run some years ago:
POMPOUS WORDS
For some years, folks have been finding in the attics of old houses
bits of furniture that are priceless. Abandoned farm houses, gaunt
and bald, have revealed, with a bit of coaxing, a purity of line and
form and a generous sturdiness of build, which are almost lost arts.
When restored, one of these fine old houses stands out from its
modem neighbors of Spanish, French, Italian, Tudor, and Mission
design, with the calm dignity of a patrician in a rabble.
Since the days of Chaucer and Shakespeare, we have had stored
away in the attic a simple, crude language that was made to order
for advertising. It consists mostly of one- and two-syllable words— odd, native,
Twenty Ways to Increase Selling Power of Copy 27

little words that barbarians used to express their uncouth thoughts.

About the time this jargon was in flower, a gang from the Mediterranean
muscled in and, with sword and monk, laid the groundwork for modem
civilization in England.
Then they began to put together that collection of mongrel words known as
the English language. The rude, vulgar, native words had to answer for the
masses and so stayed in use, but people with any pretense to culture gradually
fixed up a lot of words with fancy Latin fronts, Greek centers and a dash of
Turkish in the rear.
For the last thousand years, education in England has consisted chiefly of
learning Greek and Latin. We have been about as bad in this country. The
result is curiously shown in our writings. Young men who join us each year
from big universities for a while find it hard to express themselves in writing
with anything less than five- syllable words.
Yet, strange to say, when people are just talking back and forth they still use
the old Anglo-Saxon almost entirely.
You see, these built-up words don't, as a rule, mean anything in particular.
Take that last word, "particular." That's one of them. It is an adjective or noun
and can be made into a verb or adverb. The dictionary gives it something like
fifty different meanings. So it really doesn't mean a thing. It is little more than
a sound. It started two or three thousand years ago in some wild Latin tribe as
"par." The Roman intelligentsia dressed it up into "particula." Then the French
made it "particulier." The word has been rolling round for so long that it's all
moss and no stone.
Of course, Latin is a beautiful language and has given us a lot of nice little
words that are almost Anglo-Saxon in simplicity and clarity. But they are not
pompous words.
The reason we use short words to talk with is that they mean exactly the same
thing to talker and hearer. When we drag in a lot of jointed words, we forget
before the sentence is finished just what it was we were trying to say; and the
other fellow never does find out. For the same reason, we use short words to
think with.
Now, in advertising, it is vital that the readers shall grasp, in a split second,
whatever it is that you want them to know. You can't afford to waste a single
syllable just to impress them with your intellectual culture. Broadcasting
offers a good example of what we mean. Someone got gorgeous and produced
"superheterodyne." One Latin word and two Greek ones. Isn't that a nice word
to work into
a snappy selling talk? A manufacturer, who likes to have the public
know what he is talking about, built his appeal on "Golden Voice."
Short words are easy and pleasant to read. The eye picks up their
meaning without conscious effort. But the average reader stumbles
over pompous words and loses his mental balance. They annoy and
bore him. After about two staggers, his interest wanders and he
28 CHAPTER l

turns to the next page.

A short word takes up about one third as much room as a pompous
word. When you are paying forty dollars a line, that is quite an item.
(From an ad by BBDO, Inc.)

7. GIVE FREE INFORMATION

One way to arouse interest is to give free information as well as

sales talk in your copy. In doing this, your advertisement should be
arranged so that the free information comes first and the sales talk
second. If the sales talk is placed first, the reader may never reach
the free information section.
Here are the type of headline and opening paragraphs that
have proven successful for many a business school advertisement.
Notice that the copy starts off, not with a sales talk, but in an
editorial style. It might be the beginning of a magazine article:
A WARNING to men and women who would like to be independent in
the next five years
You can tell a $200-a-week worker how to make $350 a week.
You can tell a $350-a-week worker how to make $500 a week.
But you can't tell a $25,000 man or woman how to make $50,000.
They've got to know.
Between $25,000 and $35,000 a year is where most men and
women of talent stop.
Health, youth, good appearance, and brains will carry you far in
business.
But you cannot draw forever on that bank account unless you put
something else in. Somewhere between $25,000 and $35,000 a year
you will stop dead.
Business today is new and complex. The old rules will no longer
work. A whole new set of problems is presented by the information
explosion. Overseas markets have become a vital issue. An entirely
new conception of selling is replacing the old hit-or-miss way.
8. Selling Copy versus Style Copy

Two types of copy in use today are

1. style copy
2. selling copy
Style copy is based on the assumption that customers are
swayed by flowery language and elaborate adjectives. Here is an
example of style copy taken from a soap advertisement:
Try this soap for just 7 days and you will be convinced.
Twenty Ways to Increase Selling Power of Copy 29

You will revel in its sculptured smoothness, its deep-piled fragrant

lather. How exquisitely soft your skin is after its use—how fresh
and clear! Let your mirror show you, a little more clearly each day,
the natural charm men love to dream about!

Now read a piece of selling copy taken from another soap

advertisement:
This soap is made of olive and palm oils—no other fats whatever.
No artificial coloring. No heavy fragrance to mask other odors.
It is a pure soap—with moisturizing lather as pure and wholesome
as the complexions it fosters. So pure, in fact, that more than
20,000 beauty experts the world over have united to recommend it.

Notice how style copy consists mainly of unsupported claims,

whereas selling copy supports its claims with proof. The first
example of soap copy says, "Revel in its sculptured smoothness."
The other says, "Made of olive and palm oils—no other fats
whatever."
If there is any doubt in your mind as to whether to use style
copy or selling copy, remember that advertisers who can trace the
sales results from their ads use selling copy.
9. AROUSE CURIOSITY
Curiosity is a powerful selling tool when properly used by the
copywriter. On the other hand, the copywriter who satisfies the
reader's curiosity, instead of arousing it, is apt to lose customers.
Some time ago I read a review of a new novel. This review
aroused my curiosity about the novel and I considered buying it. A
few days later I saw an advertisement for the same novel. The
advertisement contained several long quotations from the book
itself. I read these quotations. They revealed so much of the plot of
the story that my curiosity was satisfied and I decided not to buy
the book. A book review had practically persuaded me to buy the
book. An advertisement lost the sale by satisfying my curiosity.
Here are examples of the proper use of the curiosity appeal.
These are taken from copy for mystery and adventure books.
Notice how these sentences tell enough of a situation to arouse
your curiosity; but they refrain from satisfying your curiosity by
telling you the outcome of the situation.
An intricate tale of big-time mob doings and small-town dirty
laundry . . . with a brilliantly staged conclusion at the annual ice
festival.
How could it happen in 1995 ... a millionaire's yacht stranded help-
less on a cannibal island!
30 CHAPTER l

Here are some curiosity-arousing paragraphs from a

successful advertisement for a book on how to develop a magnetic
personality:

This singular book wields a strange power over its readers by show-
ing them how to develop a magnetic personality almost instantly.
A strange book! A book that seems to cast a spell over every person
who turns its pages!
A copy of this book was left lying on a hotel table for a few weeks.
Nearly 400 people saw the book—read a few pages—and then sent
for a copy!
In another case a physician placed a copy on the table in his
waiting room. More than 200 of his patients saw the book—read
part of it— and then ordered copies for themselves!
Why are men and women so profoundly affected by this book—so
anxious to get a copy? The answer is simple. The book reveals to
them for the first time how any man or woman—old or young— can
develop a magnetic personality. It explains how to gain the personal
charm that attracts friends—the self-confidence that insures
success.

In the preceding paragraphs, notice that the method by which

the reader is given a magnetic personality is not explained. You
have to buy the book in order to discover that.
The curiosity appeal can be used with free booklets, too,
booklets that you want people to send for. Here is an example:

GET THIS FREE BOOK

A 24-page free booklet tells how you can become financially inde-
pendent—how you can provide an income to retire on—how you can
end money worries—how you can do these things and many other
things, no matter whether your present income is large or small.
This plan ... is explained in the free book. There's no obligation.
Send for your copy now.
Notice that the financial plan is not explained. The reader is
merely told that there is such a plan and that it is explained in the
free booklet. If the advertisement told what the plan was, the
reader might say, "Oh, is that all it is! I've known about that all my
life." An advertisement that gives away its secret in advance is like
a magician who shows the audience the secret of his tricks before
he performs them.
10. MAKE YOUR COPY SPECIFIC
Anybody who works on tested advertising will tell you how
important it is to be specific in your copy. For example, the
Twenty Ways to Increase Selling Power of Copy 31

statement that "97,482 people have bought one of these

appliances" is stronger than the statement "Nearly 100,000 of
these appliances have been sold." The first statement sounds like a
fact. It tells the reader that a strict and accurate count has been
made of the actual number of customers. The second statement—
100,000 have been sold—sounds like a copywriter's claim—and
possibly an exaggerated claim.
The reason there are so many general claims used in
advertising copy is that it requires time and trouble to collect
specific data.
Thus, out of more than 700 large-space ads in the December
1995 issues of 14 of America's most popular consumer magazines,
just five ads stood out for their factual approach:
■ The California date just might be the perfect snack. It has no
fat, no cholesterol, and contains only 23 calories.
■ The Cannon Sure Shot 70 Zoom—ultra compact to fit pocket
or purse ... 2x35-70mm zoom lens, fully automatic film
handling and exposure, built-in multi-function flash ... 3-point
Smart Autofocus for razor sharp shots over time. [Similar
Canon ads appeared in several of the magazines.]
■ 5 hours of intensive daily instruction • On court 4:1 student-
pro ratio • Video analysis • 45 Grand Slam courts—red clay,
Har Tru, Laykold and grass • Fitness Center • Saddlebrook
Sport science option.
■ 30% more cartilage protein than other premium brands.
■ Standard dual air bags • Steel safety cell construction • Side
door guard beams • Air conditioning • Electronic AM/FM
stereo cassette • Air filtration system • Dual remote heated
mirrors • Rear defroster and more. $15,165 [Ford Contour]
Here is a true story that shows the cash value of specific
statements. It was so powerful that the industry's association
requested that the copy, though true, be toned down.
A national producer of a building material had opened a new
mill and began local advertising in this market.
Study of the process of manufacture showed that the product
averaged 52.7% higher than the U.S. Government standard of
quality, a simple fact that might carry conviction. It was decided to
feature this fact and let the readers draw their own conclusions
based on this tangible fact.
The 52.7% point was visualized by a simple and easily remem-
bered graphic chart.
Newspaper space in selected cities and towns around the mill
32 CHAPTER l

was scheduled for a two months' campaign.

Meanwhile the strategy of the plan was developed:
1. Each county was analyzed and assigned a "value" showing
annual total consumption of all brands.
2. An unselfish feature was incorporated in each advertisement:
space to list in display type, without charge to the dealer, five
or six other fast-selling items.
3. The sales staff was instructed to release the newspaper
schedule in local papers over the names of local dealers who
placed carload orders.
The sales staff took hold of the plan enthusiastically and
within a few weeks booked 150 carload orders, largely from
new accounts . . . Soon the newspaper advertisements
appeared . . . dealers became actively interested ... buyers
noted the facts presented .. . contractors, engineers,
architects and public officials began to talk ... sales to
consumers followed ... reorders multiplied. Results far
exceeded expectations—at a cost of less than half of the
budgeted appropriation.
Then a curious situation arose. The head of the National
Association insisted that the copy, though true, be modified. It
was feared that new rulings, raising the government standard
to an unreasonable level, might result; there were rumors that
local mill owners, aroused by the competitive force of the
52.7% copy, might start a vicious price-cutting campaign.
The advertising staff was instructed to " soften" the appeal,
remove its sharp selling force. So the figure "52.7%" was
changed to "over 50%." Immediately the "kick" was taken out
of the advertising. Demand fell off to a fraction of its former
strength. Word-of-mouth comment died out. Local competitors
and association officials were satisfied.

Note how "52.7%" was accepted as definite proof of quality

and value, while "over 50%" was discounted as a mere claim in
praise of a product.

11. USE Long Copy

Whether to use short copy or long copy is a question that is
difficult to answer with definite rules. So much depends on your
special situation and on what you are trying to accomplish with
your advertising.
A. Space Advertising
Twenty Ways to Increase Selling Power of Copy 33

In general, you can observe the following situation in the

advertising in most magazines and newspapers:
1. The short-copy ads, set in poster style and containing only a
few words of copy or a slogan, are usually used by advertisers
who are unable to trace the direct sales results from their
advertisements.
2. Advertisers who can trace the direct sales results from their
ads use long copy because it pulls better than short copy. For
example, the book club advertisers, the record clubs, and the
correspondence school advertisers use ads containing 500 to
1500 words of copy. Also, you will find that real-estate
advertisers, patent-medicine advertisers, and classified
advertisers put as much selling copy into their ads as the
space will allow. These people cannot afford to run so-called
"reminder copy." They have to get immediate sales from every
ad. (See long copy ad at end of this chapter.)
3. When your picture truly speaks a thousand words, shorter
copy is often the right approach to sales success, as shown in
the proven Lenox direct response advertisement in Figure
11.1 and in the Guess?, Inc. advertisement in Figure 11.2.
34 CHAPTER l

MAH MAG 4-C tos Sep? <>S 1H F§ Opp: TOC C S 98435

Figure 11.2: How to use a one-word sales talk. When the right
picture does the total selling job in the prospect's imagination, the
only word you need is the product name. Of course creating the
picture is the key. That's why Guess?, Inc.'s president, Paul
Marciano, makes it a major part of his own responsibility. The
result, as shown above, speaks for itself.
B.Direct Mail Copy
Advertisers who sell their goods and services by means of
Twenty Ways to Increase Selling Power of Copy 35

direct mail letters have found it profitable to use long copy in their
advertising. Long copy is such a tested and proven success that
the four-page direct mail letter has become a rule, rather than an
option. Where the instruction used to be, "Say whatever you must
say, then stop/' it now is, "Say it in four pages and make it worth
reading."
For example, one of the pioneers in selling seafood by mail—
and who made a fortune doing it—started his business with brief
letters. Later on he gradually shifted to longer letters because he
found that long letters brought in more orders from customers.
(See one of his successful letters on pp. 116-117.)
Here is the brief sales letter that he used in the beginning:
Dear Sir:
I wish to call your attention to the "Davis Star Brand" of choice
selected Fat Mackerel.
I should be pleased to deliver a package to your address (shipping
prepaid by me).
All are of the same quality, differing only in size; are prepared for
cooking, and are delivered.
You will find a 20-lb. pail of either Number 1 or Number 1 Extra a
desirable size.
Hoping to receive your order, I remain
Yours respectfully,
Frank E. Davis

That is the 75-word letter the seafood seller sent out in his
own handwriting when he first started in business. After years of
sales testing, he found that he could get more and more sales by
adding more and more copy. Eventually, he sent to prospective
customers an envelope containing the following:
1. A 750-word letter
2. An order form
3. A four-page folder
The four-page folder contained 14 pictures, four main
headlines, 12 subheads, 8 testimonial letters, and approximately
1,600 words of selling copy. In his years of experience in selling by
mail, this successful entrepreneur found that long copy pays
better than short copy.
This does not mean that long copy should be used merely for
the sake of filling space. Long copy should be used in order to
crowd in as many sales arguments as possible.
36 CHAPTER l

Here are some additional points in regard to length of copy:

1. Advocates of short copy say, "I don't think anybody will read
all that small print. Let's cut the copy down to a couple of
paragraphs and set it in 18-point type."
What the advocates of short copy should say, if they want to
be accurate, is this: "I don't think everybody will read all that
small print." This is perfectly true. Everybody will not read it.
But the fact is that the very people you are most interested in
will read your ad. These are the prospects who will buy your
product or service if you tell them sufficient reasons for doing
so.
2. It is entirely unnecessary to set copy in 18-point type. People
buy magazines and newspapers to read the stories and
articles contained therein. These stories and articles are set in
7-point to 9- point type. The copy you are reading now is set in
10.5-point type.
3. The question arises: Why wouldn't it pay the short-copy users
to make their advertising do the utmost selling job by
including more sales talk? Answer: The chances are that it
would pay them.
Here is a solution to the problem of long copy versus short
copy that should satisfy the champions of both sides of the
question. Put a brief selling message into your headline and
subheadings. Put your detailed message into small print. In this
way, you accomplish two things: (1) You get a brief message across
to glancers with your headline and subheads. (2) You give a
complete message in small print to the person who is sufficiently
interested in your product to read about it.
12.WRITE MORE COPY THAN IS NECESSARY TO FILL THE SPACE
Said the copy chief of a large advertising agency specializing in
testing advertising:
We find that copy improves in quality when we cut it. That
doesn't mean that we favor short copy. It means that the
copywriter should write more copy than is necessary to fill a
given space and then boil it down.
For example, we run our new advertisements in full-page size
first. If the advertisement is successful, we repeat it as many
times as it will pay. When sales fall off to such an extent that it
doesn't pay to repeat the advertisement in full-page size, we
cut it to half-page size. Usually it can be made to pay for a
couple more insertions in this reduced space.
When the advertisement is no longer effective in half-page size, we some-
Twenty Ways to Increase Selling Power of Copy 37

times reduce it to 60 lines and squeeze out a few more sales.

I have noticed again and again that the quality of the copy improves
when we cut it. In the full-page size there are a number of unessential
words and phrases. Sometimes there are whole paragraphs that are not
essential to the sales story.
When the copy is cut to half-page size, these unessential elements are
omitted. This strengthens the copy—gives it greater sales punch.
When the copy is cut to 60 lines, (a single column by five inches), we
have to omit everything but the bare essentials. The copy becomes
telegraphic. Every paragraph is packed with selling arguments. The 60-
line version contains the best copy of all.
As an illustration of this story, look at the headline and
opening paragraphs of this sample couponed advertisement. A
similar ad was first tested in large space.
RETIRE ON AN INCOME
You don't have to be wealthy to retire on an income. You don't even
have to be wealthy to be financially independent and free from
money worries for the rest of your life.
This company has perfected a new Retirement Income Plan that
enables any person of moderate means to provide a guaranteed
income for life.
The income begins at any age you say—55, 60, or 65. It can be any
amount you wish—$2,000 a month, $2,500, even $3,000 or more.
The ad brought good results. However, the copy can be cut. In
a reduced-size advertisement, the three paragraphs were cut to
two paragraphs as follows:
RETIRE ON AN INCOME
This new Retirement Income Plan enables you to provide for your-
self a guaranteed income for life.
The income begins at any age you say—55, 60, or 65. It can be any
amount you wish—$2,000 a month, $2,500, even $3,000 or more.
Later this copy was put into small space and the message was
reduced to a single sentence, as follows:
RETIRE ON AN INCOME
This new Retirement Income Plan enables you to retire at 55, 60,
or 65 with a monthly income of $2,000, $2,500, even $3,000 or
more, guaranteed for life.
This discussion on cutting copy is not to be considered an
argument in favor of short copy If you have space for long copy, it
is advisable to use long copy. The point of this discussion is that
copy usually improves when you cut it. Therefore, if you have
space for 500 words of copy, don't just write 500 words. Write
38 CHAPTER l

1,000 words and boil it down to 500 words. If you have space for
only 50 words, write 200 words and boil it down. A piece of copy is
like a pot of broth. The more you boil it down, the stronger the
flavor gets.

13. AVOID HELPING YOUR COMPETITORS

An advertisement for a large-screen TV set that describes in

general terms the enjoyment of television helps to sell not only
your own TV sets, but your competitor's sets as well.
Suppose you sell a woman the idea of buying a TV set and she
goes to a store where TV sets are displayed. She may buy the type
of set you are advertising. But the chances are equally good that
she will buy a competitive make. Your advertising will help your
sales more if you sell your particular TV set, its tone, its picture
quality, its power, or some other special feature.
The same is true in other lines. An automobile advertisement
that sells your particular car is better than an advertisement
selling the idea of owning an automobile, as no one else has done
better than in the Jaguar mailing in Figure 11.3. An advertisement
that sells your own special brand of coffee has more effect on your
sales than an advertisement describing the pleasures of coffee
drinking. Better yet, combine both into the same message. This
seems like an elementary rule. Nevertheless, it is often violated.

14. USE MAIL ORDER METHODS IN DIRECT MAIL ADVERTISING

The problems of direct mail advertising are almost identical with

the problems of mail order advertising. In each case you are trying
to get attention, arouse interest, and induce action. The vehicle
carrying your message is the only thing that varies. In direct mail
advertising, your message comes to your prospects in envelopes
addressed individually, just to them, and, as in Figure 11.4, even
hand addressed. In mail order advertising, your message comes to
the prospect by means of a page in a magazine or newspaper or
via broadcasting.
This means that the rules of mail-order advertising apply with
equal force to direct mail. Rules for headlines, first paragraphs,
use of subheads, length of copy, type of copy, and so forth, all may
be applied to direct mail. In a direct mail letter, however, the first
sentence is your headline. Just as the headline of a mail order
advertisement decided whether or not the prospect will read the
copy, so the first sentence of a direct mail letter usually decides
whether or not the prospect will read the letter.
Here are some letter beginnings that were used by successful
Twenty Ways to Increase Selling Power of Copy 39

direct mail advertisers. Computer technology permits cost-

effective addressing to individuals by name:
Dear Charles P. Holten:
(Some computer addressing systems must use the entire name.)
Do you know what "The Lost Books of the Bible" are? How they
came to be? Why they are attracting such widespread interest?

Dear Mrs. Charters:

I met a woman the other day who, through sheer skill and hard
work, has amassed a considerable fortune and has risen far
beyond her original associations.

Dear Mr. Mangun:

Here is a letter with a selfish motive. Selfish on my part for I shall
gain—and, oddly enough, gain through actually saving money for
you.

Dear Friend: (generic, probably noncomputerized letter):

Somehow we failed you.
A few weeks ago, dissatisfied with your personal progress, or
ambitious for quicker progress, you wrote us asking whether we
could help you.

Dear Friend: [With this first sentence, the salutation hardly matters.]
Enclosed find check for $200.
We all like to get letters that begin that way, don't we?

One advantage you have in direct-mail advertising is that you

can enclose a number of different pieces of advertising material in
the same envelope.
For example, the mailing may contain the following:
1. An outer envelope, usually with what direct mailers call "a
teaser"; that is, a must-open-and-read-more message
2. A personalized letter printed on white stock
3. A four-page folder printed on cream-colored stock
40 CHAPTER l

Figure 11.3: Six questions in search of an answer. The 14" x 5-1/2"

envelope, mailed First Class, grabs attention. A personalized letter
from the President tells how he fell in love with a car and why you
will too. A striking eight-panel flyer unfolds into six questions about
your relationship with your present auto, then answers
Twenty Ways to Increase Selling Power of Copy 41

all six . . . with Jaguar. Two full-size inserts tell what it costs
and dramatize the premium. No wonder 2,700 cars were
taken for a test drive and over $15,000,000 of them were
sold. Winner, ADDY Award Best of Show. Winner, the One
42 CHAPTER l

Show Gold Pencil First Prize.

Figure 11.4: Not your everyday Diamond Jubilee. As a direct-

response agency, Grizzard used the medium it knows best to do
more than just brag about its 75th anniversary. At two-week
intervals, clients, prospects, vendors, and friends received a
personalized letter and a collector-item stamp, valuable in itself, to
celebrate an important date in client-agency relationships. Elegant
hand- addressed invitation-size envelopes and ample use of gold
foil maintained the celebratory feeling . . . and produced a flood of
requests for additional copies. Winner, 1994 John Caples Award.
4. A leaflet of testimonials printed on green stock
5. A page of newspaper clippings reproduced on newspaper
Twenty Ways to Increase Selling Power of Copy 43

stock
6. An order form, printed on yellow stock
7. A business reply envelope printed on red stock
You may ask, "Why use seven separate and distinct mailing
pieces printed on different kinds of stock? Why not incorporate the
entire message, testimonials, news clippings, order form, and
everything in a 16- page booklet?"
The answer is that all large users of direct mail such as
insurance companies, correspondence schools, record clubs, and
book publishers have found the other method more effective. The
reason is this: Much direct-mail advertising goes directly to the
wastebasket. A prospect will rarely throw all of your mailing pieces
into the wastebasket, however, without at least glancing at them. If
your entire advertising message is contained in a single circular or
a single booklet, prospects will devote a few seconds to it and if it
doesn't arouse their interest, they will throw it away. On the other
hand, if your envelope is stuffed with half a dozen different mailing
pieces, prospects will probably glance at each piece before
throwing it away. People hate to throw things away without at least
glancing at them. They want to avoid disposing of anything valu-
able. Therefore, your envelope plus six different inserts give you
seven opportunities to catch the interest of the prospect instead of
only one opportunity. Note that this is an "opportunity," not a
guarantee. You must make EVERY SINGLE PIECE of your mailing
SELL AT A GLANCE. Put all, or even the major part, of your "sell"
into just one piece such as the folder and you have wasted six-
sevenths of your selling opportunity.
15. Overstatement Copy Versus Understatement
Advertising copy today is showing a trend toward understatement,
and in some cases understatement copy has shown greater pulling
power than the other kind. Here is an example of the old-style
"overstatement" copy:
I WILL TRAIN YOU AT HOME TO FILL
A BIG-INCOME JOB!
Be an Electrical Expert. Learn to earn a big salary. Get in
line for a top job by enrolling now for my easily learned,
quickly grasped, right-up-to-the-minute, Spare-Time,
Home-Study Course in Practical Electricity.
You don't even have to be a High School Graduate. As Chief
Engineer of the Engineering Works of a million-plus city, I know
exactly the kind of training you need, and I will give you that train-
44 CHAPTER l

ing. My Course in Electricity is simple, thorough, and complete and

offers every person regardless of age, education or previous experi-
ence, the chance to become, in a very short time, an "Electrical
Expert," able to make big money.

Compare the preceding copy with these more recent

conservatively worded and convincing paragraphs taken from a
business-school advertisement.
TO THE MAN OR WOMAN WHO IS 35 AND DISSATISFIED
From thirty-five to forty is the critical age for opportunity. In these
years a man or woman either marks out the course that leads to
promotion or advancement, or settles into permanent unhappiness.
There are thousands who see the years passing with a feeling close
to desperation.
They say, "I have to make more money." But they have no plan for
making more.
They say, "There is no future for me here." But they see no opening
anywhere else.
I'm managing to scrape along now," they say. "But how in the world
will I ever educate my children?"
To men and women whose minds are constantly—and often almost
hopelessly—at work on such thoughts, this page is addressed. It is
devoid of rhetoric. It is plain, blunt common sense.
Let us get one thing straight at the very start—
We do not want you unless You want us
There are the dissatisfied men and women who will do something
and the ones who won't. We feel sorry for the latter, but we cannot
afford to enroll them. We have a reputation for training those who—
as a result of our training—earn large salaries and hold responsible
positions. That reputation must be maintained. We can do much,
but we cannot make anyone succeed who will not help themselves.
So rest assured you will not be unduly urged into anything.

In most advertisements that offer a free booklet, there is a

paragraph at the end that urges the reader to send for the booklet.
Here is a sample paragraph that is a good example of
overstatement copy.
REMARKABLE BOOK, "PRACTICAL SELLING," SENT FREE With my
compliments I want to send you a most remarkable book, "Practical
Selling." It will show you how you can easily become a Master Sales
Representative—a big money-maker—how our system of
Salesmanship Training will give you the equivalent of years of
selling experience in a few weeks; how our FREE Employment
Service will help you select and secure a good selling position when
you are qualified and ready. And it will give you success stories of
former routine workers who are now earning amazing salaries as
Twenty Ways to Increase Selling Power of Copy 45

sales representatives. Mail the coupon today. It may be the turning

point in your life.

Now read a very different kind of paragraph, also offering a

free booklet:
A booklet has been prepared that tells about this new Course and
Service. Its title is "What an Executive Should Know." It should be
read by all the men and women who face the responsibility of
shaping their own future. It is free. We will send you this booklet if
you will simply give us your name and address on the coupon below.
But we do not urge you to send for it. If you are the type of man or
woman for whom the new Course and Service has been
constructed, if you are determined to take advantage of the rich
opportunities of the next five years, you will send for it without
urging.

Even in the selection of testimonials, the copywriter must

make up her mind whether overstatement or understatement will
be most effective in convincing her particular type of prospect.
Here is a typical overstatement testimonial:
PLANT ENGINEER'S PAY RAISED 150%
"I was a dumbbell in electricity until I got in touch with you, but
now I have charge of a big plant including 600 motors and I direct a
force of 34 skilled workers—electricians, helpers, etc. My salary has
gone up more than 150%."

Here is the other type of testimonial, the conservative type.

Notice how the copywriter has injected comments that help to sell
in parentheses:
We wish you could read the letters that come to us in every mail.
Here is one, for example, from John H., of Hagerstown, MD: "I was
floundering around without a definite goal," he says, "and was seri-
ously considering a Civil Service appointment." "The study of your
Course and Service was in no way a hardship," he continues,
"rather it was a real pleasure, because it is so practical and
inspiring throughout." (The method of the Institute makes it
practical and inspiring.) "Added self-confidence and increased
vision gained from the Institute's work," says Mr. H., "enabled me
to accept and discharge added responsibilities successfully."
He is an officer now of the organization in which he was once a dis-
satisfied "cog."

If it is important to avoid overstatement in copy, it is also

important to avoid the appearance of overstatement. When a
manufacturer brings out a new product, the best advertisement for
it is often a simple news write-up in which the headline clearly
46 CHAPTER l

states the most important feature, the subhead the next most
important feature, and the copy the other features.
Do not try to gild the lily. Do not weaken your entire
advertisement by giving the impression that you are trying to
make your proposition sound better than it really is.
The news-style copy that follows introduced what has become
a standard feature of many alarm clocks:
NEW CLOCK WAKES YOU WITH MUSIC
Tuneful notes replace strident clangor, with loud alarm in reserve
It is no longer necessary to have your morning ripped open with
imperious jangling that is little short of cruelty to the sleep-
softened nerves. A new Westclox product approaches the subject of
awakening, tunefully and softly at first.
Thus amiably roused, you can shut off the alarm and face the day in
a pleasant mood. Should this musical awakening go unheeded, the
clock waits a few moments and rings again, this time too loud to be
ignored.

16. Avoid Trick Slogans

Avoid slogans and catchlines that are obviously untrue. For

example, a manufacturer of mint candies used the slogan "On
every tongue." This is obviously untrue. Everyone knows that these
candies are not on every tongue. It is merely a trick phrase. Some
less clever but true selling argument, such as "The flavor lasts,"
would be more effective.

17. Get Help from Others

It is helpful to take an advertisement or a headline you have just

written, show it to others whose opinion you respect, and get their
opinion.
 Twenty Ways to Increase Selling Power of Copy 47

But be sure to get a true opinion. Most people don't want to hurt your feelings
by telling you that your idea is terrible and should be thrown into the
wastebasket. They will be most likely to nod their heads and say, "That's a fine
idea." Sometimes you can find a few people who will give you their frank,
unvarnished opinion. That is a true find, and useful.
The trouble with most critics is that they are too optimistic. One way to
overcome this difficulty is to never show them just one piece of copy or one
headline. Show them two pieces of copy or two headlines and ask them which
one they like better. Then they will praise one and criticize the other. In this
way you can get a true opinion.
It is also helpful for the copywriter to work directly with the client in
preparing copy, instead of sending a representative or account executive to
sell it to the client. Messages that go back and forth secondhand have four
chances to get misunderstood.

18. Do Not Say that Salesperson Will Call

Some advertisers offer a free booklet in their advertising in order to get the
names and addresses of people interested in the product. A salesperson
delivers the free booklet or, after it has been mailed, telephones or calls on
the prospect. If this is your plan of action, do not mention in the advertising
that a salesperson will call. To do so will cut down your coupon returns at
least 75 percent.

19. Study the Selling Copy in Mail Order Catalogs

The large mail-order houses, such as J. C. Penney, Sears Roebuck, and L. L.

Bean, are masters of the art of selling goods by means of printed words and
pictures. The next time you are puzzled as to how to sell a product, study a
mail-order catalog and see how the mail-order people approach the subject. In
the large mail-order catalogs you will find excellent sales talks for almost
every product you can think of.

20. Make Every Advertisement a Complete Sales Talk

It is an old rule but a good rule to write every advertisement as if it were the
first and the last word to be said on the subject. Do not depend on the reader
having read any previous advertisements for the product you are selling. Do
not assume that the reader will learn from future advertisements the selling
arguments that you fail to include in today's advertisement. Make every
advertisement a complete sales talk. Bring in every important sales argument.
Suppose a financial firm is selling an investment plan that enables a man
to do any or all of the following:
1. Provide an income for his wife in case of his death.
2. Provide money to send his child to college.
3. Provide money to leave his home clear of debt.
48 CHAPTER l

Suppose a sales representative for this financial house has three

prospects to call on. She has never seen these prospects before. She knows
nothing about them. Suppose the sales representative should plan her calls as
follows:
"I will talk to Prospect A about leaving an income for his wife" (regardless of
whether Prospect A is married or not).
"I will talk to Prospect B about sending his child to college" (regardless of
whether he has a child or not).
"I will talk to Prospect C about leaving his home clear of debt" (regardless of
whether or not he lives in a rented apartment).

No sales representative would work under such a disadvantage. Yet

every advertisement is a sales representative. Every advertisement is sent out
to call on a prospect. Why handicap the advertisement by deciding in advance
that it will discuss only a single sales argument? Put every important selling
point into every advertisement.
21. URGE THE READER TO ACT
Every mail order advertisement ends with a strong urge to "Act Now." Unless
there is a definite reason to the contrary, the general advertisement should
end with a similar urge. You have caught the readers with your headline. You
have interested them with your copy. Do not leave them hanging in midair.
Tell them what to do. If you can give them a definite reason for immediate
action, such as "Price is going up" or "Supply will soon be exhausted," so
much the better.

Advertising has induced progress in the use by manufacturers of

new materials, new tools, and new processes of manufacture by
calling their attention to economies which could be achieved and to
the new uses to which they could be put. Without such advertising,
information of this kind would take years to reach all of those who
might benefit by it and progress would be delayed.
Harry S. Truman
 DRAMATIZING DULL PRODUCTS
Often the copywriter is handed a tough assignment in the shape of an
uninteresting product that must somehow be dramatized in the advertising. A
number of instances will be described of how such dull products as cough
drops, disinfectants, statistics, sewing machines, and even grave vaults have
been made exciting.
ADVERTISING A STATISTICAL SERVICE
Suppose you were asked to prepare an advertising campaign for a statistics
company, a company whose business is to furnish statistical analyses to
investment houses and other business concerns. Wouldn't you consider it a
difficult job? Statistics are so dull—no human interest, no drama.
Yet such a company published a series of advertisements as dramatic as
a motion-picture thriller. The series was called, "Famous Wrong Guesses in
History."
Here is a sample:
WHEN MILLIONS OF DOLLARS WERE THROWN INTO THE GUTTER
Forty-five hundred miles of canals costing over $200,000,000. And barely one in
ten actually paid. Small wonder men called them "The most expensive gutters in
the world"!

The copy tells how the canals of 1830 were doomed by the steam
locomotive—how "sure things" fail today just as in 1830—how in the long run,
facts and facts alone make for lasting success.

4
9
 50 CHAPTER 12

A class of products dull in themselves, but sometimes dramatically advertised,

ADVERTISING A DISINFECTANT
are the disinfectants. An example is the campaign that created a nationwide
awareness of "bad breath" by equating it with the medically sounding
"halitosis" and the practically miraculous curative powers of gargling with
Listerine.
Another disinfectant campaign consisted of a series of "horror"
advertisements for Lysol. Here is one:
A CROSS ON THE DOOR SEALED THE DOOM OF ANOTHER HOUSEHOLD
London was a nightmare of horror that summer. The Black Death raged through
the city. Victims died so fast that condemned prisoners collected the bodies by
the cartload.

In a subsequent paragraph, the product being advertised was

introduced:
200 years later the medical world discovered that disease is caused by germs.
Today, science wages war upon germs, and one of its weapons is "Lysol"
Disinfectant.

A LESSON FROM SHAKESPEARE

In some of his plays, Shakespeare permits the audience to learn, not only
what a certain character is saying, but also what he or she is thinking. This is
done by letting the actor make a remark directly to the audience. The remark
is labeled an "aside." Eugene O'Neill, among other contemporary playwrights,
also used this method in some of his plays.
This same trick has enabled copywriters to inject drama into dull
products in the form of "hidden thoughts" copy. For example, a cough drop is
not an exciting article, yet cough drops were dramatically brought to the
reader's attention in a Luden's series called, "If he said what he thought." A
typical advertisement pictured a salesman coughing across the desk of a
purchasing agent. The purchasing agent flies into a rage and orders the
salesman out. Underneath the picture is this headline:
If he said what he thought:
"Get out . . . I'm tired of you salesmen giving me colds!"
ADVERTISING PAPER TOWELS
Paper towels are another product that, at first glance, seems to lack dramatic
possibilities. What can you say about them? Softness? Smoothness?
Absorbency? These are the things everybody expects you to say and are
consequently commonplace.
Here is how a paper towel manufacturer put human interest into his
copy:
HE NEVER KNEW UNTIL HE OVERHEARD THEM
[Illustration:] Office Manager overhearing talk in employees' washroom.
"Plenty of hot water, good soap—but these things they give us for towels—"

"Second the motion—we ought to be paid to use 'em."

How to Avoid Special Problems in Copywriting 51

A HAND LOTION CAMPAIGN

The makers of a hand lotion decided to tell the world that their product was
good for chapped hands. But a dozen manufacturers of skin lotions have
claimed the same thing. This advertiser wanted to be different. A dramatic
"Shame on You" campaign did the trick. Typical headlines:
She hid her hands in her lap . . . shocked at their rough, chapped redness
against the snowy cloth.

She sat out every dance ... ashamed of her chapped hands.

ADVERTISING CELLOPHANE
Another product that seemed to offer little drama was cellophane, the first
transparent film used to wrap candy, cake, and at-home leftovers. What could
be said about cellophane? That it kept products clean and safe from handling?
Or that customers could see what they bought, even though it was wrapped?
That might be copy material, but it's far from dramatic.
The makers of cellophane boldly compared their man-made wrappers
with the protective wrappers produced by nature—and to nature's
disadvantage! For example:
Com hides behind its husk... but nothing is hidden when wrapped in transparent
cellophane.
The coconut's wrapper calls for X-ray eyes . . . but anyone can see what's
wrapped in cellophane.
Nature shows her onions . .. She gives them a protective, transparent skin
almost as good as cellophane itself!

GRAVE VAULT COPY

Perhaps the most difficult product in the world to dramatize is a grave vault.
Try to think of some dramatic treatment yourself. Then read how the Clark
Grave Vault Company handled the problem.
THE TREMENDOUS POWER OF STEAM . . .
BUT METAL CONTROLS IT!
[Illustration:] Steam locomotive rushing head-on toward reader
Rails sing as the railroad train hurls its thousand-ton weight across the
continent. Steam rages to be free from the monster's belly, but steel confines it.
Wherever there must be imperviousness to water in any form— metal never
fails. Naturally the Clark Grave Vault is made of metal—12-gauge copper steel.

BEVERAGE COPY

At one time the makers of a chocolate flavoring powder used four-color full-
page ads to tell people that their product was nourishing—that it contained
Vitamin D—that children loved it. Sales were falling off. Then the makers of
this product started using dramatic situations to bring their chocolate milk
drink to the attention of the public. Sales increased. Here is a typical
advertisement:
 52 CHAPTER 4

HELEN DISLIKED THE VERY SIGHT OF MILK . . . NOW I

GIVE IT TO HER A NEW WAY AND SHE LOVES IT
[Illustration:] Angry mother exclaiming to child, "Drink that milk or go straight to bed!"
"My little girl was underweight. Then my sister suggested this chocolate
flavoring for the milk. How glad I am! Helen loves it. . . put eight pounds on her
already ..."

SEWING MACHINES

Sewing machines were used by our grandmothers. One would think that all
the possibilities of advertising them dramatically would be exhausted by now.
Not so. There is drama that will appeal to any woman in the series published
by a popular sewing machine company. For example:
YOU REALLY LOOK GREAT TONIGHT"
It was like old times to hear her friends say it. Not in months had they said one
word about her clothes . . .
Are you, too, dreaming of the clothes you want, but can't afford?
. . . Our modern sewing machine will make sewing a joyous adventure. . . .

COURSE IN ENGLISH
How can a copywriter put drama into a correspondence course in English
grammar—a subject often considered dull? A dramatic campaign for a
correspondence course in English showed the way. The headline of a typical
advertisement said, "What are your mistakes in English?" The illustration
showed a young lady talking to her boyfriend. Mistakes in English were
popping out of their mouths: "I ain't.. . You was .. . Can't hardly."
Proof of the effectiveness of this advertising was found in the fact that
although comparatively little money was spent for space in magazines, many
people became familiar with the campaign. Each advertisement got as much
attention as three or four ordinary advertisements.

OFFICE STATIONERY

A maker of writing paper, sold a lightweight paper for office use. Questions:
How do you dramatize it? How do you impress office managers with the fact
that this paper lets them send multipage letters and documents at low cost?
The following headline accomplishes this purpose:
NOW YOU CAN SEND A 12-PAGE LETTER FOR A SINGLE FIRST CLASS STAMP
The copy makes this offer: "Just by way of proof—ask your secretary to
write for a sample and we shall send 12 letterhead sheets by First Class
mail."

SEA CRUISE

For years the ship companies—sellers of travel—have been singing the same
song with headlines like these:
 53 CHAPTER 9

An ideal winter cruise follow the sun to South America come with us to
Mexico Live where winter's smile is sunniest
One line added a dramatic touch by advertising to women
using copy like this:
WATCH YOUR HUSBAND . . .
IS HE A DRAWING-ROOM SPHINX?
Conversation is a lost art with many a successful businessman,
unless the talk turns to business.
The unfailing remedy is a winter cruise. Sea travel takes a
man's mind completely off his business concerns ...

The copy sold sea voyages to entirely new prospects. It

caught the attention of people who never before had
considered an ocean trip.

SUMMING UP THE VALUE OF DRAMA

What can drama do for advertising? By its attention value it
can make a small advertising appropriation do the work of a
large appropriation. It can attract new customers—people who
would not normally be customers. It can give emphasis to some
particular feature of your product or service. It can put new
life into a worn-out theme.
One of the most popular of the dramatic methods seems to
be the "domestic drama"—little dramas involving husbands
and wives, girlfriends and boyfriends, and, in select media,
same-sex couples. The "hidden thought" type of copy and the
"Shame on You" theme are also popular.
The next time you write an advertisement for a dull
product, try to dramatize it. And remember, many products are
dull until some copywriter puts life into them.

PROBLEMS WITH HEADLINES

How can a life insurance company explain in a few words the
fact that a small down payment on a life insurance policy can
immediately increase the size of a man's estate? Here is a
headline that does this:
TODAY . . . ADD $10,000 TO YOUR ESTATE—
FOR THE PRICE OF A NEW SHIRT
How can an automobile brake relining service emphasize
the high value and the relatively low cost of its service in
terms of accidents avoided and lives saved? The following
headline puts the story into a few words:
Is the life of a child worth $99 to you?
A correspondence school selling a mail order course in
54 Chapter 15

business training had this problem:

1. Experience showed that the ads that pulled best were those
that
featured salary increases as a result of taking the course.
2. It was not possible to make a specific promise in the ads
such as
"You can add $5,000 to your income" because some of the
students
who took the course did not receive salary increases.
The advertising manager said: "Our problem is—how can
we talk about salary increases in the headlines of our ads
without making a specific promise?" The following headline
was devised to accomplish the desired purpose:
TO A TEN-THOUSAND-DOLLAR EMPLOYEE WHO
WOULD LIKE TO BE MAKING $25,000

Notice that the headline skillfully implies the possibility of

a raise in pay without making a definite promise. Depending
on the target audience and with an appropriate adjustment of
the dollar amounts, the same approach works today, 20 years
after this headline first ran.
Here is another successful device:
[Illustration:] Photograph of an executive in a handsome
office.
[Headline]: This private office with salary to match may be
waiting for you.

The suggestion of a benefit without actually making a

specific promise can also be accomplished by putting your
headline into the form of a question.
For example, a beauty-product manufacturer was so
excited about a new item that they wanted to claim that they
had discovered the fountain of youth. But a specific claim to
this effect would have been refused by almost all publications
and disbelieved by readers. A successful ad was prepared,
however, with a headline in the form of a question, as follows:
HAS THE SECRET OF ETERNAL YOUTH BEEN DISCOVERED AT LAST?
A medical advertiser wanted to tell people how they could
cure nervous disorders. However, the promise of definite cures
is not permitted. So this advertiser prepared a successful ad
with a headline in the form of a question:
DO YOU HAVE THESE SYMPTOMS OF NERVOUS EXHAUSTION?
The advertisers of a stock market guide wanted to say
"How you can make money in the stock market." A toned-down
headline was used, however, that was more believable and
therefore more effective:
How to Avoid
WHYSpecial Problems
SOME PEOPLE in Copywriting
ALMOST 55
ALWAYS MAKE MONEY IN THE STOCK MARKET
Providing a testimonial is true and can be documented,
you can prepare a qualified but effective ad by writing
testimonial style headlines as follows:
HOW A NEW KIND OF CLAY IMPROVED MY COMPLEXION IN 30 MINUTES HOW I
IMPROVED MY MEMORY IN ONE EVENING

These headlines cause readers to say to themselves:

"Maybe I can get the same results." Though the headlines do
not specifically promise that everybody will get these results,
you must be ready to prove that the person quoted got them!
Another way to qualify a promise is to include a money-
back guarantee in your headline as follows:
GET RID OF DANDRUFF IN 10 DAYS OR THERE'S NO COST!
HANDS THAT LOOK LOVELIER IN 24 HOURS OR YOUR MONEY BACK

USING COUPON OFFERS TO ATTRACT STORE

CUSTOMERS
Practically every day, retail stores advertise special offers to
induce customers, old and new, to come to the store.
For example, in one city, a department store ran a small
newspaper ad offering a ten-speed bicycle at a reduced price.
The ad contained a
coupon that the reader was instructed to bring to the store.
Printed in the coupon was a picture of the bicycle, and the
following copy:
$68.88—Reg. $89.95.
Coupon good Washington's Birthday only.
Limit 1 per customer.
All the bicycles on hand were sold out the first afternoon.
More than 200 coupons were redeemed, with total sales in
excess of $14,000. Yet the ad cost only $480!
An increasing number of merchants are successfully using
the same device, namely, a small newspaper ad containing a
coupon to be clipped out and brought to the store. An
attractive offer is printed in the coupon. So common has this
become that many everyday consumers, as well as professional
commercial buyers, will no longer buy at full price. They know
that a special offer is likely to appear if only they can wait.
Here are some typical offers, together with the sales results
obtained:
Sam's Restaurant: 2 chicken dinners for the price of one. Over
750 returns. Sales: approximately $2,900.
Checker Auto Parts: Oil filter $3.99. Over 4,000 returns. Sales:
56 Chapter 15

over $5,000.
Kennedy's Firestone: Service offer: (1) Complete lubrication. (2)
Oil change. (3) New oil filter. (4) Rotate tires. (5) Adjust brakes. (6)
Repack outer front wheel bearings. (7) Check wheel alignment. (8)
Complete safety inspection ... All for $55.88. Six stores booked solid.
Sales: over $11,000.
Robo Car Wash: One free car wash. Over 2,000 returns. Sales:
approximately $4,500.
Antoine's Sheik Restaurant: $5 off on each $16.95 combination
dinner. Over 150 returns. Sales over $2,500.
Vaughn's Clothing Store: 10% off on all suits, coats, slacks,
shirts, sweaters, pants, etc. Sales: over $4,600.
A.N.A. Photo and Appliance Center: FM/AM Radio $16.95, reg.
$37.95 . . . Minolta Camera $169, Reg. $265. Over 70 returns. Sales:
approximately $5,500.
Worth's Clothing Store: Wet-Look Coats $23, Reg. $60. Over 100
returns. Sales: over $3,300.
Pizza Palace: $1 off any large pizza. Over 1,200 returns. Sales:
over $9,600.
Fish Monger—Food to go. 1(2 Special. Buy one at reg. price and
pay \<t for the 2nd order (fish & chips $5.35; Swordfish steak $7.75;
Halibut steak $7.45.) Over 1,100 returns. Sales: over $8,200.
57 CHAPTER 12

Howare
Here someStore
to Make points to notice
Coupons regarding coupon promotions:
Effective
Many advertisers set time limits. Examples: "Coupon good
thru [date] . . . " "Offer expires [date] . . . " "Coupon good 1-day
only [date]."
Some stores set restrictions. Examples: "Limit 2 items per
coupon" . . . "Limit 1 per customer" ... "Not valid for take-out
orders."
Some stores specify that the customer must bring the
coupon. Examples: "$5.88 with this coupon" ... "This coupon
entitles, [etc.]" ... "Come clip us—with coupon."
Some stores include items like these: "Please phone for
appointment" ... "Supply limited" ... "First come! First
served" ... "Free pony ride for the kids."
A big advantage of a coupon is that it becomes a reminder
to the customers after they have tom it out and put it into a
pocket or purse. They can't forget it because it is right there
staring at them.
Another advantage is that customers need to do little or
no talking when they approach the dealer. Many people are not
articulate. They don't like to walk up to a proprietor and say: "I
understand that you are offering a complete lubrication, oil
change, new oil filter, brake adjustment, wheel alignment, etc.,
all for $55.88." The coupon does the customers' talking for
them. They don't have to say a word if they do not want to.
QUESTION: Briefly stated, how can you use special
coupon offers to induce customers to take the first
important step, namely, to step into the store?
ANSWER: Make an irresistible offer. Print the offer on a
coupon. Put the coupon into the hands of as many
prospects as possible, and at the lowest possible cost.

American advertising has learned to tell the truth

attractively about American products. When the
product is good, and the truth is told, we have the
appealing combination that secures sales and keeps
the wheels of industry turning.
Norman Vincent Peale

THIRTY-TWO WAYS TO GET

MORE INQUIRIES FROM YOUR
ADVERTISING __________________________^--------f
 CHAPTER
S 13
ometimes in advertising it becomes advisable to secure as
many inquiries as possible. For the sake of ready reference
and at the risk of repetition, 32 effective methods for
increasing ad replies follow.
These methods may be divided into two general classes:
1. The methods that increase inquiries by increasing the total
effectiveness of your advertising. For example, the use of
long copy plus an interesting headline increases the total
effectiveness of an advertisement, and the increase in
replies is merely a by-product of a better advertisement.
2. The methods that increase ad replies but do not increase
the total effectiveness of your advertising. For example, a
picture of a free booklet with the subcaption "Get This
Free Book" will get more inquiries, but it does not make
your advertisement any better.
The methods are explained in detail on the following
pages and summarized at the end of this chapter.
1. MENTION THE OFFER IN THE HEADLINE
Suppose your headline is "How to retire on an income." You
can increase response by changing it to read "Free booklet
tells how to retire on an income."
Suppose your headline is "Overweight Men and Women."
You can increase response by changing it to read "Free to
Overweight Men and Women."
Here are other examples:

58
59 CHAPTER 2
YOURS FOR ONLY $1.00—This Lovely Box of Greeting Cards FREE SALES KIT—
Make Up to $200 a Day GIVEN TO YOU—The Oxford Dictionary Free Ski
Guide Home Repair Book—Read It for 7 Days Free
2. EMPHASIZE THE WORD "FREE"
You can increase replies by putting the word "Free" in big print
or in capital letters. In broadcast advertising and in printed
advertising, you can repeat the word "free" several times. Or
you can frequently repeat phrases that mean essentially the
same thing, such as "Send no money," "Don't pay a penny," or
"Yours without cost." However, "FREE" means exactly what it
says. The FTC requires that any and all conditions be con-
spicuously disclosed in immediate conjunction with the offer.
3. MENTION THE OFFER IN A SUBHEAD
The subhead may follow immediately after the main headline
like this:
[Main headline] New electronic calculator
[Subhead] Free 10 day trial

Or the subhead may be placed in the middle of the ad or

near the end. Here are typical subheads:
SEND FOR LIBERAL
SUPPLY THE FACTS
ARE FREE WRITE
FOR BOOKLET
SPECIAL $1 OFFER
FREE TALENT TEST

4. SHOW A PICTURE OF THE BOOKLET OR SAMPLE

If you have lots of room, you can show the booklet or sample
package in large size. Your layout can include eye-catching
devices such as an arrow or a hand pointing at the booklet.
The speed with which an offer registers on the eye of the
reader is important. Therefore, one of the best inquiry-getting
layouts is a picture of the booklet with the word "Free" printed
alongside it or under it, as shown in Figure 13.1.
60 CHAPTER 4

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Name_________ _____________™_.___________________________ _________________

WdfMi _ __________ __ ________________„

City _ _________ ___________________ _______ __________

sa* ______________ _____________________ * ____________

Figure 13.1: How to make small-space promotions work harder. Direct

response card packs have reached the consumer market. There is no other
promotion in which every single element means so much, and this one
does them all right. All seven headline words work hard at grabbing
attention. The first three products tell of excellent hourly rates. Eleven
career opportunities are described and a Free Information Kit offered. The
prospect doesn't even need a stamp; the card is returned postage free.
Despite the tiny type and jam-packed format, testing showed that
switching from single to multi-product cards and ads reduced per- inquiry
cost by 50 percent.

In small ads you can save space by reducing the picture of

the booklet down to the size of a postage stamp. You can even
cut it in half and show only the top half of the booklet. If your
booklet title is hard to read in reduced size, you can reset the
title on the ad artwork in readable type before you make your
reduced-size print. If you control the design, have a legible title
created for the original booklet and for everything else that is
likely to be shown in reduced size. If only the top half of the
cover is seen in advertisements or "take-one" displays, put the
title on the top half only. Not only will this reproduce better
without costly reworking, but the stronger title will be more
effective as a selling tool when it is received by the customer.
This may sound obvious, but you will be astonished at how
often it is contradicted by artists more interested in show than
in sell.
Thirty-two Ways to Get Adore Inquiries from Your Advertising 61

In TV commercials, you can have the actors or actresses

hold up the booklet or gift and show it to the audience. Or else
they can hold up the gift all wrapped and ready to mail, point
to the address label and say: "Send me your name and address
so I can put it right here and mail this free gift to you."
Incidentally, the phrase "free gift" is especially good in
both printed and broadcast advertising because this phrase
says free twice in just two short words.

5. MENTION THE OFFER IN THE FIRST PARAGRAPH

Most copywriters remember to include a description of the
free booklet at the end of the ad. But many forget to include a
brief mention of the booklet at the beginning of the ad. Some
of the best-pulling ads mention the free booklet twice: (1) A
brief mention early in the ad; and (2) a complete description at
the end of the ad.
In broadcast advertising, you can use this same technique
by saying at the beginning of the commercial: "Get pencil and
paper ready. In a few seconds I am going to offer you a free
gift."

6. USE AN ATTRACTIVE BOOKLET TITLE

Just as ad headlines are often the deciding factor in getting
people to read ads, so are booklet titles often the deciding
factor in getting people to send for booklets. Here are some
attractive booklet titles:
ACCOUNTANCY—THE PROFESSION THAT PAYS

NEW BEAUTY FOR YOU

HOW TO PROTECT YOUR INVENTION

YOUR FUTURE IN COMPUTER PROGRAMMING

HOW TO GET A GOVERNMENT JOB

NEW YORK VACATION GUIDE

HOW TO CARE FOR YOUR DOG

7. INCLUDE AN ATTRACTIVE DESCRIPTION OF THE OFFER

In writing a description of a booklet, you should sit down with

the booklet in front of you and turn the pages and write down
every good thing you can say about it. Then take your list of
items and condense it into a paragraph. For example:
Booklet contains 32 pages, 14 illustrations (5 in color), 9
sketches, 4 diagrams, 7 case histories, 2 maps, a list of do's
and don'ts, 5 chapters (including complete instructions), a
chart for predicting results, and an appendix containing scores
of useful items.

The "table of contents" technique is also effective. You can

 62 CHAPTER 4
include a panel of copy like this:
AUTO MECHANIC'S BOOK TELLS Page 3
How
How to
to fit pistons
locate engine knocks Page 7
How to service main bearings Page 1 2
How to recondition valves Page 14
How to adjust fan belts Page 20
How to rebuild a clutch Page 22
How to service brakes Page 25
How to adjust steering gear Page 27
How to time ignition Page 29
How to tune up an engine Page 31
In radio advertising, you can use "table of contents"
the ' technique
by having the script say "On Page 3 you will find instructions
on how to fit pistons. On Page 7 you will find out how to locate
engine knocks. On Page 12, how to service main bearings,"
and so on. For television, you can use essentially the same
script for voice-over while the pages appear on the screen.
Hint: Some booklets are difficult to describe attractively
because they contain only sales talk. In these cases, it may be
worthwhile to revise your booklet and include some
information of a helpful nature. A garden-seed advertiser made
his seed catalogue ads pull better by putting in a chapter of
gardening advice.
8. INCLUDE A BOOKLET FOREWORD BY A FAMOUS PERSON
A booklet on hearing aids was made more attractive by
including an introduction by a popular author who used a
hearing aid himself. A music-school booklet contained a
foreword by a well-known conductor. A booklet on beauty care
had a chapter written by a movie star. A recipe booklet
featured favorite recipes of famous chefs. And the book you're
holding in your hands was undoubtedly helped by the
Foreword by David Ogilvy.
 63 CHAPTER 9

9. INCLUDE TESTIMONIALS
An ad for an income tax guide included testimonials from a
homeowner, a sales representative, a professional, a working
parent, and so forth. For example:
Sales representative: "I use my car for selling and do a lot of
entertaining. I thought I had deducted everything until your
Income Tax Guide showed me 18 deductions I never thought
were allowable."
Working parent: "Saving on even our combined salaries isn't
easy. I thought tax returns were an impossible job until your
Income Tax Guide showed me how many of our expenses are
deductible—like the clothes we donate to the Salvation Army."

10. SWEETEN YOUR OFFER

The ad for the income tax guide mentioned earlier contained
this paragraph:
Special Free Bonus: Filled-in Tax Forms ... To give you every
possible tax saving—and to save you time and trouble you will
also receive a 16-page booklet of sample tax forms, completely
filled in for your guidance. This is yours to keep, even if you
return the Income Tax Guide for refund.

A series of ads for G.E. light bulbs offered "a booklet

about light and seeing." When it was desired to increase
replies, a free gift was offered in addition to the free booklet.
An airline wanted to increase replies from ads about
flights to Bermuda so that sales literature could be mailed to
as many prospects as possible. A free booklet offer did not pull
sufficient replies, so the following offer was used and brought
excellent results.
Absolutely free—a Bermuda Vacation Kit. The kit contains
detailed map of Bermuda and photographs and descriptions of
the big, new luxury Air Liners. Included in the free Kit are a
pair of Bermuda sunglasses.

If you have been charging for your booklet, you can

probably increase replies by reducing the price. If you want to
charge for your booklet and at the same time feature the word
"free," you can use the following wording, providing it is true:
"Free booklet. Enclose [amount] to help cover cost of handling
and mailing." Beware, however, of making your offer so
appealing and at such a low price that you will attract
premium hunters rather than prospects. Here, as elsewhere,
testing and careful record-keeping is the key to profitable
success.
11. INCLUDE A COUPON
A coupon printed in an ad helps increase returns in several
ways. It draws attention to the offer. It makes the offer clear
and simple. It indicates to the readers that you really want
64 Chapter 15

them to write and that they are fully entitled to receive your
booklet or sample. It gives the readers a convenient form in
which to write their name and address. When tom out of the
ad, the coupon serves as a continuing reminder until it is
mailed.
In a small ad, where space is limited, you can gain some of
the advantages of a coupon without using one. You can say,
"Tear out this ad and send it with your name and address to:"
Caution: If your coupon leads are followed by in-person
sales calls, "qualify" each response by a professional
telemarketing person or service. If you do not, you may find
that your sales staff is wasting valuable time following up
prospects who are primarily interested in getting a booklet or
a sample rather than in buying your product.
On the other hand, if you are actually selling your goods
by mail, and if the customer has to charge to a credit card or
send payment with the coupon, you can put as much emphasis
on the coupon as you wish.
12. PRINT THE VALUE ON THE COUPON
Some advertisers print "Value 10tf or "Worth 50tf" or some
other value on the coupons in their ads. An ad published by a
greeting card manufacturer had this headline: "This giant
$2.75 greeting card assortment yours to keep for 25tfPrinted
across the top of the coupon was the line, "This coupon worth
$2.50."
13. INCLUDE SOME SELLING COPY IN THE COUPON
Examples:
BOOK LEAGUE OF AMERICA
Please send me—FREE—the brand-new giant Webster's New
World Dictionary of the American Language, over 2,000 pages,
weighing 10 lbs., containing over 140,000 definitions, 1,400
illustrations, maps, etc., and enroll me as a member.

American Technical Society (Publishers since 1898)

Please rush me the following books I'm checking below to
examine at home. If I'm not convinced these books will help me
save thousands of dollars by doing my own building and
planning, I may return the books and owe nothing.
14. PRINT YOUR ADDRESS TWICE IN EACH AD
Did you ever pick up a magazine in a doctor's or dentist's
waiting room and find a coupon missing from one of the ads?
Suppose you wanted to answer that ad? You wouldn't know
where to address your reply if the only address in the ad was
contained in the missing coupon. To guard against loss of
replies, some advertisers include their address twice— once in
the coupon and once elsewhere in the ad. For example, in a
full- page ad for the Coyne School, the address and key
Thirty-two Ways to Get Adore Inquiries from Your Advertising 65

number appeared in a coupon in the lower righthand comer of

the ad as follows:
Coyne School, 500 S. Paulina St.
Dept. 62-73H, Chicago, Illinois 60612
In the lower left-hand comer of the ad, the address and
key number were repeated in the form of a logotype as follows:
Coyne School 500 S. Paulina St. Dept. 62-73H Chicago, Illinois 60612
15. INCLUDE A TELEPHONE NUMBER—ESPECIALLY A TOLL FREE
NUMBER
Some people like to act fast, and they like to make inquiries
and order by telephone. If you are advertising in newspapers
or using local broadcasting, you can limit yourself to a local
telephone number. However, even local response is increased
greatly by emphasizing the free-to-the- caller 800 option. Since
many of us expect 800 (or the new 888) service to be limited to
long-distance calls, use a bold-type statement such as Free
800 service for local calls too! An adult education school
advertiser found that putting a telephone number in their ads
not only increased inquiries but also improved the quality of
the inquiries. They found they could sell only one out of five
people who wrote for a school catalog, but they could sell one
out of two people who telephoned. By asking discreet
questions they could find out the special problems of people
who telephoned and offer to solve their problems. They could
say, "We have many students who have the same problems that
you have. We are starting a new class next Tuesday night at 8
P.M. You are invited to sit in and listen. If you will tell me where

you are located, I will tell you the easiest way to reach the
school."
Do you use national advertising in newspapers,
magazines, or broadcasting and have a network of local
dealers or use a national Yellow Pages program? You can say,
"See the Yellow Pages in your telephone book." Or you can use
a toll-free 800 number. For example, an Air Force recruiting ad
said: "Send in the postcard or call toll-free 800-447- [number]."
16. SPOTLIGHT FAX FOR ORDERING—MAKE IT TOLL-FREE

Put your FAX number where it can't be missed. Place it

directly above the coupon in newspaper and magazine ads and
right on the reply card or order form. Make it toll-free too. If
you think you can't afford your own 800 number, use a nearby
answering service for a test.

17. EMPHASIZE "NO OBLIGATION"

Here are sample phrases you can use in copy or in coupons:
No obligation
Send me without obligation I understand
66 Chapter 15

that this does not obligate me I am under

no obligation, now or ever
I understand this book is mine to keep, and sending for it does
not obligate me in any way
No salesman will call

18. OFFER CERTAIN INFORMATION IN A PLAIN ENVELOPE

Here are examples of the type of information people prefer to
receive in an envelope that does not identify the product:

1. Hearing aid booklet

2. Data on personal loans
3. Personal hygiene booklet
4. Maternity booklet

19. URGE IMMEDIATE ACTION

Some advertisers increase inquiries by offering a reward for
immediate action. For example:
Fill in the coupon below and mail it for your free copy of 32-
page information Booklet. If you act at once, we will include
Success Booklet and Chart, which supply additional
information you should have. All will be sent postage paid.

Other action-promoting devices are sentences such as

"Supply is limited," or "For a short time only." Or you can use
simple urges to action such as the following:
Mail coupon today
Act now—offer expires April 30th
Rush your name for free outfit
Get free book by sending coupon NOW
John Stem, the Hahn agency's top copy consultant, had
extraordinary success because of a "computer error" in such
an action-promoting device. A single line of the letter, seen in
an envelope window, should have said: RESPOND BY
THURSDAY, MAY 19. Instead, it said: RESPOND BY
THURSDAY And indeed they did . . . 39% more than a mailing
without the "mistake."

20. INCLUDE A BUSINESS-REPLY POSTCARD

A number of advertisers include in their ads a business-reply
postcard that requires no postage stamp. Examples of these
may be found in Reader's Digest, TV Guide, and to a lesser
extent, in hundreds of other publications. A reply card adjacent
to the ad usually brings dramatic increases in response. It also
gives you dramatic increases in cost. Testing will show the cost
effective use.

21. INCLUDE A FOLD-OVER COUPON

Thirty-two Ways to Get Adore Inquiries from Your Advertising 67

A less expensive way to get some of the effectiveness of a

business-reply postcard without paying the premium rate for it
is to include a preaddressed business-reply coupon that is
double the size of the normal coupon. Providing the paper
meets postal regulations, the prospect can simply cut out this
double coupon, fold it over, seal it, and mail it with no postage
stamp. In effect, this is a do-it-yourself business-reply card. Be
sure to check with the post office on current rules for size and
paper thickness ("weight").

22. USE A FREE-STANDING INSERT

What is it that catches your eye and falls into your hands when
you open your Sunday newspaper? A free-standing insert. This
device is made to order for a mail-order advertiser. If you have
an extra-long message, your free-standing insert can be a
multipage booklet or even a complete mail-order catalog. If
your message is not so long, you can use a singlesheet insert of
stiff paper and print your message on two sides, front and
back. The insert can contain a business-reply postcard or order
form. Free-standing inserts cost more than ordinary ads, but
they bring more response. They combine important elements
such as attention value, long copy, and an easy-to-mail order
form that requires no postage stamp. In many larger
communities, free-standing newspaper inserts can even be
designated for delivery to specific neighborhoods or ZIP codes.
23. TEST SEVERAL DIFFERENT OFFERS

One way to step up returns is to test the pulling power of two

or more different offers in one publication and then run the
best-pulling offer in your entire list of publications. To get the
most accurate test, you should use the facilities of some
publications offering "split-run" copy testing whereby one offer
appears in half the circulation and the other offer appears in
the other half of the circulation on the same day and in the
same position. More than 1,000 newspapers offer split-run
copy testing; so do hundreds of magazines.
As a rule, you will find that offers of food samples and
soap samples pull well, whereas offers of patent-medicine
samples, such as cold remedies and headache remedies, pull
poorly.
Another way to test offers is to make two or more
different offers in your coupon and say, for example:
Check the offer you want
____Sample can of floor wax
____Sample polishing cloth

If you are selling insurance, for example, you can test

offers by listing several different pamphlets in your coupon, as
follows:
68 Chapter 15

Check the pamphlet you want

____How to provide money to send a child to college
____How to provide money to pay off a mortgage
____How to provide an income in case of disability

After you have found out which offer pulls best, feature
that offer in future advertising and subordinate the others as
"also available." Just because an offer didn't "win" does not
mean you can afford to ignore its particular audience.

24. TEST SEVERAL DIFFERENT ADS

After you have discovered the best-pulling offer, you can test
several different ads containing the offer. In a series of ads
containing the same offer, you will often find one ad that due to
a better headline or better picture will pull twice as many
inquiries as the other ads.
You can test your advertisements in inexpensive space
before you run them in expensive space. For example, you can
get a quick, low-cost test in a daily newspaper. After you have
found your best-pulling ad,
69 Chapter 15

you can run it in your entire list of newspapers and

magazines and adapt it for use in radio and TV commercials.

25. USE THE MOST EFFECTIVE MEDIA

In some cases, publication ads will bring inquiries at lower
cost than will broadcast commercials. In other cases,
broadcasting will do better than publications. Your judgment
and experience will often enable you to select the best
medium. If you are not a media expert and do not have one on
staff, however, contact several media services to learn how
they can help in media selection and evaluation. In either case,
sometimes you will have to run actual tests of media.
After you have found out whether broadcast advertising or
publication advertising is best for your proposition, you can
further refine your testing and find out which broadcasting
stations or which publications, are most efficient. And what is
true of testing publications and broadcast, is equally true for
direct mail, telemarketing, the internet, and media yet to be
discovered.

26. SKIM THE CREAM FROM VARIOUS MARKETS

After a few ads have run in a certain publication or on a
certain broadcasting station, you may find that your cost per
inquiry is rising because you have skimmed the cream off that
particular market. If you are using broadcast commercials, you
can try shifting to a different time of day in order to reach a
different group of listeners or viewers. Or you can try different
channels or stations. If you are using publication advertising,
you can try different publications.
Mail order advertisers find that readers of certain
magazines are so responsive that it is profitable to run an ad
every month. On the other hand, certain magazines can be
used only once or twice a year if inquiry costs are to be kept
down. This system of shifting media is something like fishing.
The experienced fisherman shifts from one location to another
in order to catch more fish.

27. USE THE MOST EFFECTIVE SPACE SIZE

Certain propositions, such as book clubs, get the most sales

per dollar of space cost by using full-page ads, whereas other
propositions, such as vacation guide books, do best with ads
measuring one-half column or smaller. Apparently, it takes long
copy to sell the idea of a book club, whereas a small ad is
sufficient to induce people to send for a free vaca- tion-guide
booklet. What size space is most efficient for your proposition?
You can determine this by testing ads in several different sizes.
28. USE LONG COPY
After you have found your most efficient size ad, you should
70 CHAPTER l
jam your space full of copy, no matter whether it is a one-inch
ad or a full-page ad.
Brief, reminder-style copy consisting of a few words or a
slogan does not pull inquiries as well as long copy packed with
facts and reader benefits about your product or service.
If you want to see efficient use of space, look at mail order
catalogs or at the mail-order ads in magazines or in your
Sunday newspaper. Some of the strongest-pulling mail-order
ads have contained as many as 1,200 words of copy set in small
print. Don't be afraid to use long copy or small print. Just be
sure that your copy is interesting. Remember the saying, "The
more you tell, the more you sell," as dramatically demonstrated
in Figure 13.2.
29. USE THE BEST SEASON
During certain seasons, people read publications, listen to
radio, and watch television more often than during other
seasons. Good months for high mail-order returns are
September through Christmas and January, February, and
March. The summer months are not as good. One test of
couponed ads in which the same ad appeared in January and in
August showed that January pulled twice as many replies as
August.
The day of the week makes a difference in newspaper
advertising. One test showed that Sunday newspaper ads
pulled 40 percent more replies than did daily newspaper ads.
Of course, the Sunday editions, depending on circulation, cost
proportionately more too!
30. USE THE BEST-PULLING POSITIONS IN PUBLICATIONS
In checking ad returns, you will find that there is a logical
relationship between position and pulling power. The financial
page in newspapers pulls best for financial and business items.
The women's page is usually best for household items. Position
alongside food articles is good for food ads. Pages 2 and 3 and
the back page are good in newspapers. The top of the page is
better than the bottom of the page. The magazine sections of
Sunday newspapers usually have good pulling power. In
national magazines, pages 1, 3, and 5 are usually excellent.
31. STUDY THE OFFERINGS OF YOUR COMPETITORS
If you are just starting out and have no experience in a
particular line, it is important to study the keyed ads of other
advertisers—especially mail-order advertisers. No mail-order
secret can long be kept secret from
Thirty-two Ways to Get Adore Inquiries from Your Advertising 71

Figure 13.2: Sixteen times better than a nezus-style pagel What's 16

times better than a news-style ad page? A 16-page news-style insert! Ads
from "business partners" lend authenticity to this advertorial targeted at
golf course superintendents. Preadvertising research had shown this
audience to be information hungry. Post-publication research showed a 20
percent jump in product awareness. The resulting sales leads and sales
catapulted Sandoz's new fungacide brand to #3 in a mature market.
the eyes of an observant student of advertising. The reason is
because the survival of a mail-order business depends on
repeating the best- pulling ads over and over in the best-
pulling media. Therefore, if you want to know which is the
most resultful ad of certain mail-order advertisers, all you have
to do is to look in the back files of publications and see which
ads they have run most often. If you want to know which
72 CHAPTER l
publications are best, for them, just make a note of the
publications in which they spend the most money. Information
of this sort gives you a head start in placing inquiry-getting ads
for your own proposition.

32. KEEP RECORDS OF YOUR RESULTS

Of course, you should key all of your ads and keep careful
records of results. You can key your ads by saying in the
address "Write to Dept. 1" or "Write to Dept. 2," and so on. Or
you can print in the coupon a tiny key number such as RD-5,
which would mean Reader's Digest, May issue.
In addition to your computer records, it is good to use a
card file system of small filing cards for each type of sales
effort—print, direct mail, and so forth. For instant accessibility,
print the computer data or make a separate card for each ad.
Include the essential facts about each ad, namely, headline,
size of ad, cost of ad, publication, date, position, and number of
inquiries and/or sales. Divide the cost of the ad by the number
of inquiries or sales and enter the cost for each at the top of
each card. File the cards according to cost per response,
beginning with the lowest cost. Keep analogous records for
telemarketing, direct mail, and radio and TV. Then review your
card file at regular intervals and determine which ads and
which media are doing best for your proposition. In this way,
you will be able to plan your future efforts to avoid failures and
repeat your successes.

SUMMARY OF 32 WAYS TO GET MORE INQUIRIES

FROM YOUR ADVERTISING
For your convenience, the thirty-two ways to increase ad
inquiries are summarized here.
1. Mention the offer in the headline
2. Emphasize the word "Free"
3. Mention the offer in a subhead
4. Show a picture of the booklet or sample
5. Mention the offer in the first paragraph
73 Chapter 15

6. Use an attractive booklet title

7. Include an attractive description of the offer
8. Include a booklet foreword by a famous person
9. Include testimonials
10. Sweeten your offer
11. Include a coupon
12. Print the value on the coupon
13. Include some selling copy in the coupon
14. Print your address twice in each ad
15. Include a telephone number
16. Spotlight FAX for ordering
17. Emphasize "No obligation"
18. Offer certain information in a plain envelope
19. Urge immediate action
20. Include a business-reply postcard
21. Include a fold-over coupon
22. Use a free-standing insert
23. Test several different offers
24. Test several different ads
25. Use the most effective media
26. Skim the cream from various markets
27. Use the most effective space size
28. Use long copy
29. Use the best season
30. Use the best-pulling positions in publications
31. Study the offerings of your competitors
32. Keep records of your results

The advertising profession is an integral part of the life of a free

nation. It has helped create markets where markets did not
previously exist. It has not merely sold products which the public
wanted. It has sold products which the public did not know it wanted.
More important still, it has made possible the only free method for
the large scale manufacture of goods on a mass basis.
Thomas E. Dewey
74 CHAPTER 2

O
ne of my earliest advertising assignments was to prepare an
advertisement for Mr. Blank's Hair Growing Treatment. In
attacking this problem, I reasoned thus: If everyone realized
that this treatment actually grows hair, we would make
thousands of sales. Therefore, our problem is to prove that
the treatment works. Why not let the public know that if the
treatment does not grow hair, Mr. Blank, the manufacturer,
would be criminally liable for fraudulent advertising?
With this idea in mind I produced this headline:
I WOULD BE IN JAIL IF MY TREATMENT DIDN'T GROW HAIR
To add a dramatic touch, I illustrated the advertisement
with a picture of Mr. Blank actually behind prison bars.
The advertisement produced loud laughs from a fellow
copywriter. "So that's the way you spend your time" she
exclaimed, "making fun of our clients!"
I concluded that if my advertisement were
misunderstood by one of our own copywriters, it would
certainly be misunderstood by the public.
The average reader makes a snap judgment in
interpreting an advertisement. Therefore, for the sake of
clarity, the headline and the illustration of
an advertisement should tell the same story.
In this case, the headline said, "I would be in jail," but
the picture said. "I am in jail." My copywriter friend reacted
to the picture before she read the headline. Pictures convey
their message faster than print.
 Here is an example of a mail-order book ad in which the
headline and the picture do tell the same story:
[Headl ine]: This is Marie Antoinette riding to her
death.
[Illustration:] Picture of Marie Antoinette riding to her
death.
This ad dramatized a scene described in a set of literary
classics. The ad drew eight times as many coupon results as
any previous ad for this set of books.

THREE AIDS TO PULLING POWER

Three well-known and often neglected aids to pulling power
are
1. Short paragraphs
2. Short sentences
3. Short words
There is nothing more discouraging to the eye than a
block of solid type. Break up your long paragraphs into short
ones. Short paragraphs invite the eye. A long sentence forces
readers to do tiresome mental gymnastics. It forces them to
keep your opening thought in mind while they absorb half a
dozen other thoughts.
As for short words, the following story illustrates their
value. A publisher of children's books wanted to know the
secret of the popularity among children of a certain history
book. Children preferred this particular history book to any
other. Some even read it in their spare time when lessons did
not require it.
The publisher questioned the author of the book. The
author replied, "When the manuscript was finished, I gave it to
a ten-year-old child and asked him to cross out all the words
he didn't understand. I then substituted simpler words."

OTHER WAYS TO MAKE COPY EASY TO READ

Do not clutter up your copy with too many contractions such
as "We're" instead of "We are," "We'll" instead of "We will,"
"He'll" instead of "He will."
Contractions tire the eye. They force the eye to take the
tiny apostrophes into consideration. To the careless reader,
"We're" looks like "Were." "We'll" looks like "Well." "He'll" looks
like "Hell."
Other contractions such as "Shan't," "He's," "It's," "You'll,"
"They'll," and so on, may not look
7 like other words, but they
tire the eye 5
 Ho ip to Appeal to a Mass-Market Audience 76
just the same. In the following columns, you will notice that it is
just a bit easier to read the words in the right-hand column:
Shan't Shall not
He's He is
It's It is
You'll You will
They'll They will
Do not use too many exclamation marks. An exclamation mark
looks like the letter "1." Consider this headline for a popular
beverage:
HERE'S HOW!
The word "how" with the exclamation mark coming immediately
after it looks like the word "howl."
Consider this headline:
How to get Your name on Uncle Sam's payroll!
To the careless eye, the word "payroll" looks as if it were spelled
with three "l's." Result: slight confusion.

A PLAN FOR AVOIDING DIFFICULT SENTENCES

When you have finished writing a piece of copy, give it to someone to

read aloud. An agency executive received a mailing from a magazine.
Here is the opening paragraph:
The purpose of this letter is to demonstrate the market an analysis
of Blank Monthly readers presents to advertisers.
The chances are that you stumbled just a little in reading that
paragraph. If the writer of the letter had given it to someone to read
aloud, that person would have stumbled, too. The paragraph could
then have been changed to read like this:
The purpose of this letter is to show you the type of readers you can
reach by advertising in Blank Monthly.
A piece of advertising writing should be not only grammatically
correct and properly punctuated, but it must read smoothly—swiftly.
There must be no need to go back and read certain portions again.
The reader should not be forced to keep an eagle eye out for commas
and apostrophes. Avoid sentences that require complicated
punctuation.
Small irregularities in your copy may confuse the reader for only
a second. But a second's confusion multiplied by a million readers is
a lot of confusion.
STYLE-CONSCIOUS COPY
Read this paragraph taken from an advertisement:
 How to Appeal to a bAass-tAarket Audience 77

You haven't tried Blank's Biscuits? . . . Try them, like them—and

thereafter you'll find them always the same, all around the world,
unchanging and good.
This is a mild example of style copy—the kind of copy that pays
more attention to how a thing is said than to what is said. Consider
the first sentence. You do not know it is a question until you come to
the question mark. Up to that time you have been reading the
sentence as a simple statement. Result: slight confusion.
The last sentence of the copy says: "You'll find them always the
same, all around the world, unchanging and good." Does this mean
that you can buy Blank's Biscuits anywhere in the world? Or does it
mean that if you take a package of Blank's Biscuits around the world
with you they will not spoil in any climate?
There is much of this style copy being written. It gives the
reader the impression that something brilliant has been said, but just
exactly what has been said the reader cannot remember.
The weakness of style-conscious copy can be seen in the
following headlines. Each headline expresses the same thought. But
the thought comes out strongest in the third headline, which contains
no style, just plain English.
1. TO THE $25,000 MAN OR WOMAN WITH $50,000 POTENTIALITIES.
2. WHEN YOU REACH IT, $25,000 IS JUST ANOTHER MILESTONE.
3. TO THE $25,000 MAN OR WOMAN WHO WOULD LIKE TO MAKE $50,000.
Here is a sentence that conveys an idea in a rather complicated
style: "It is unlawful to appropriate, for your personal use, any
property that rightfully belongs to other individuals."
Here is how the same idea is expressed in simple language:
"Thou shalt not steal."
The simplicity of the latter wording is not offensive to
sophisticated readers, no matter how many college degrees they
have. And the simple wording is clear to readers who have little
schooling.
In order to increase the pulling power of your advertising, your copy should
be simple, not subtle. You will not offend educated readers by making your
advertisements understandable to all readers.
WORDS THAT NEED EXPLAINING
The manager of a department store prepared an advertisement for
some household articles. Before publishing the ad, he handed it to
an experienced copywriter for suggestions.
At the beginning of the copy, this sentence occurred:
Most of these articles are exclusive with this store.
 78 CHAPTER 4

The copywriter added four words to the sentence, making it read:

Most of these articles are exclusive with this store—
Cannot be obtained elsewhere.
Further on in the copy, this sentence occurred:
Every one of these articles is guaranteed.
The copywriter expressed the sentence in fuller detail as follows:
Every one of these articles is guaranteed. If any trouble develops within a year,
we will replace the article with a new one. Or, if you prefer, your money will be
cheerfully refunded.
The copywriter said: "Words like 'exclusive' and 'guaranteed'
have appeared in advertisements so often that they have lost their
original force. Furthermore, there are plenty of people who never
did know the real meaning of the words. Therefore, it is wise to
explain them."

PRESENTING THOUGHTS SIMPLY

Here is a plan that can be used effectively in writing advertising

copy. Read the following paragraph:
This chapter tells some methods for making advertisements simple.
The average reader understands only simple advertisements.
Now read a slight rearrangement of the same paragraph.
This chapter tells some methods for making advertisements simple.
Simple advertisements are the only kind that the average reader
understands.

The difference between the two arrangements is this: In the

first arrangement the second sentence begins with the words. "The
average reader." In the second arrangement the second sentence
begins with the words. "Simple advertisements."
 79 CHAPTER 9

Arrangement number two is slightly easier to understand. Here

is why: The first sentence ends by leaving the thought "simple
advertisements" in the reader's mind. The second sentence begins
with the same thought.
PROOF THAT SIMPLICITY IS VITAL
The necessity for simplicity in appealing to a mass audience is
proved by the experience of other businesses besides the advertising
business.
Consider the motion picture business. It is well known that the
sophisticated motion pictures are, more often than not, box-office
failures.
Compare the circulations of the great national magazines. Those
that reach large audiences are not the sophisticated magazines. For
example, the circulation of the Atlantic Monthly is only a fraction of
the circulation of Reader's Digest.
Take the case of the tabloid newspapers. These journals have
gone the limit in simplicity by telling the news primarily in pictures
instead of words. What has been the result? Until it lost much of its
audience to the even more pictorial medium of television, The New
York Daily News, a picture newspaper, had the largest circulation in
America. It still ranks among the top three, if we exclude the
nationally circulated The Wall Street Journal, U.S.A. Today, and The
New York Times.
MORE PROOF
There are a number of people in the advertising business who are not
sold on the value of simplicity. These people continue to write New
Yorker copy for Reader's Digest.
There are other writers who admit that simplicity is valuable.
Yet they continue to write difficult copy because it is easier to write.
They are like the man who at the end of a long-winded letter added
this P.S.: "Please pardon this long letter. I didn't have time to write a
short one."
In spite of the sales advantage of simplicity, scores of advertisers
continue to print advertisements that are over the heads of readers.
Here are some ad headlines that were published in magazines:
For a Discriminating Clientele The Giant and the Pygmy Give Your Toothpaste
Proxy to Her
Does the average citizen know the meaning of clientele, pygmy,
or proxy?
Modem advertising copy is full of words such as these:
fastidious, distinctive, exhilaration, virtual, veritable, heritage. It is
 80 Chapter 15

full of phrases such as: Sophisticated cuisine . . . Beautifully

appointed interiors . . . Craftsmanship in volume production. Is this
the language of the mass audience?
What advertising man or woman has not read (or perhaps
written) a paragraph like the following, which appeared in an ad:
In the big centers where a multiplicity of power broadcasting stations
embarrasses less selective receivers, the full range selectivity of the
Excelsior Receiver simplifies reception by banishing overlapping.
The next time you write a paragraph like this one, or the next
time you write a clever advertisement, give it to a few people of
average education and see what they get out of it. Their reaction will
tell you more clearly than words why it is not clever to write clever
advertisements.
When young writers first enter the advertising business they
often rebel at the advice: "Write simply. Use short words and short
sentences." There is a temptation to write clever advertising that
brings praise from fellow copywriters, from account executives, and
from clients. In fact, some writers never recover from this
temptation.
In the mid-1930s, I once made a marketing investigation in
several small cities in Ohio. The job consisted of going from house to
house and asking housewives if they used a washing machine, and if
not, why not.
One night, while at a hotel in the city of Ashtabula, I received
this telegram from the advertising agency that employed me: "Ask
one hundred women if they know what a Pianola is." I smiled to
myself. What a silly question? Of course, the women would know.
Everybody then knew that a Pianola is an old-style mechanical piano.
I recalled a popular song—vintage of high school days:
And we'll tickle a tune upon the Pianola
The next morning, when I had finished asking the first housewife
her opinion of washing machines, I grinned a bit sheepishly and said,
"Do you know what a Pianola is?" She looked at me blankly—as if I
had asked her to explain Einstein's Theory of Relativity. I looked back
at her blankly. I could scarcely believe that she did not know. Finally I
managed to smile and say, "I guess you never heard of it. They are
not very well known. Thank you. Good day."
The second housewife I spoke to also looked blank and could
give no answer. The third asked if a Pianola was a new kind of
washing machine. The final tally showed that only one woman out of
ten knew the meaning of Pianola.
In writing advertising copy, use words you would expect to find
 How to Appeal to a Mass-Market Audience 19 7
in a sixth-grade reader.

A MISUNDERSTOOD ADVERTISEMENT
A manufacturer of Hi-Fi radio receivers prepared a billboard poster
featuring the fact that his particular set had power. The poster
consisted of the following elements:
1. The name of the radio. Let us call it the Acme Radio.
2. A picture of a powerful speedboat traveling at such high speed
that the bow of the boat was lifted out of the water.
3. The single word "Power."
This diagram shows how the poster looked.

ACME HI-FI RADIOS

[picture of motorboat]
POWER

The poster caused advertising professionals, including myself, to

say "Wonderful."
One day while riding in a bus I passed one of these posters. I
heard this conversation behind me:
"What kind of motorboat is that Acme Motorboat?"
"I don't know. She sure cuts through the water."
Always remember that you are writing for people like that. To
them a picture of a motorboat is an advertisement for a motorboat.
And nothing on earth—not even the word "Radio" in huge letters—
can make it an advertisement for a radio.
When you are advertising motorboats, show pictures of motorboats. But
when you are advertising radios, no matter how powerful, show pictures of
radios.
Here is another incident. One evening while riding in a bus
along Riverside Drive, New York City, I heard a woman behind me
read an advertisement aloud to her companion. The advertisement
consisted of three sentences flashed from a Mazola Oil electric sign
facing the drive. One of the sentences was, "You will like its smooth,
bl— flavor." She started to pronounce the word "bland," hesitated
and gave it up. What a pity it is that we copywriters are not more
frequently brought into contact with the literary limitations of our
readers.
 82 Chapter 15

A LAWYER'S SECRET
A successful lawyer discovered by experience the value of simplicity
in winning lawsuits. He said, "Half the cases that go to court today
are not presented to a jury. Instead, each lawyer presents his or her
side of the case directly to the judge in the form of a written brief. I
am always glad to work on this type of case because I have learned
how to write a more effective brief than many of my opponents.
"The way I accomplish this is to make my brief very simple. I
omit all legal language such as 'the party of the first part/ and 'the
party of the second part' etc. I write my brief as if I were writing a
letter to a friend who did not understand legal terms. I have
considerably increased my percentage of successes in this manner."

A MISUNDERSTOOD HEADLINE
I once wrote an advertisement for a book called Courage. The book
told how to banish fear and develop self-confidence. In searching for
a striking headline, I reasoned thus: One of the best-known examples
of courage is the bulldog. And one of the most striking words for
expressing the idea of courage is the word "grit." I put these two
ideas together and produced this headline:
I will give you Bulldog Grit
In preparing the layout, a picture of the author of the book was
placed above the headline like this:
[Picture of Author]
I will give you
Bulldog Grit
[copy]
This arrangement gave the impression, so desirable in mail
order advertisements, that the author of the book was speaking
directly to the reader.
I showed the advertisement to a friend. "How does this ad
appeal to you?" I asked.
My friend nodded approvingly. "It sure would stop me if I owned
a bulldog."
I stared at him. "What has owning a bulldog got to do with it?"
"Well, isn't that Bulldog Grit a brand of dog food?"
I went back to my desk and changed the headline to "I will give
you Bulldog Courage."
 How to Appeal to a Mass-Market Audience 19 7
HOW TO MAKE A GOOD HEADLINE BETTER
Often the more direct the approach, the bigger the difference. Take
two ads for a gasoline additive. The first ad had the headline: "Save
one gallon of gas in every ten." It pulled a large number of requests
for a sample of the product.
It was then decided to try a more selective approach. The two
words "Car owners" were inserted at the beginning of the headline
as follows:
"Car owners! Save one gallon of gas in every ten"
There was no other change. The copy in both ads remained the
same.
The two versions of the ad were split-run tested in a daily news-
paper. The second version, beginning with the words "Car owners"
pulled 20 percent more sample requests than the first version.
This test is just one of many experiments that have been tried
over the years involving changes in headlines. In a number of cases,
these headline changes have resulted in appreciable improvements
in results. The following are examples of these successful changes.
HEADLINE: "HAY FEVER"
A maker of a hay fever remedy got good response from a sample
offer contained in a small ad headlined "Hay Fever." This advertiser
then tested other ads containing the same copy, but with different
headlines. One of the new headlines was "Dry Up Hay Fever."
Here are the results of a newspaper split-run test: The ad with
the headline "Hay Fever" pulled 297 sample requests. The ad with
the headline "Dry Up Hay Fever" pulled 380 sample requests. This is
a 27 percent increase obtained by merely adding two words. These
two words “Dry Up" added a promise of a benefit to the purely
selective headline "Hay Fever."

Headline: "Retire in 15 Years"

A retirement income advertiser seeking leads for sales

representatives got good response from an ad headline "Retire in 15
Years." This ad ran successfully for several years. Then the advertiser
changed the headline to "How a Man of 40 Can Retire in 15 Years."
The response was increased. And equally important, the quality of
the leads was improved. The replies came from men ages 35 to 45—
just the age group that insurance sales reps like to call on. Many men
and women in this age bracket have both the desire to start saving
for retirement and the means to do it.

HEADLINE: "HOW TO HAVE A COOL, QUIET BEDROOM"

 84 Chapter 15

A manufacturer of portable air conditioners ran ads with the headline

"How to Have a Cool, Quiet Bedroom." The ads contained a tele-
phone number and offered further information. The telephone replies
were switched to the sales staff who invited prospects to come to the
manufacturer's showroom. Later on, four words were added to the
headline of the ad as follows: "How to Have a Cool, Quiet Bedroom—
Even on Hot Nights." This change made the headline more dramatic
and strengthened the promise of a benefit. Replies and sales
increased.

HEADLINE: "HOW TO REPAIR CARS—QUICKLY, EASILY, RIGHT"

At an advertising conference, a mail-order copywriter told this case

history. An ad with the headline: "How to Repair Cars—quickly, easily,
right" was successful in getting orders. Then the word "Repair" was
changed to "Fix." The new headline was "How to Fix Cars—quickly,
easily, right." Orders increased 20 percent. Apparently, the word
"Repair" sounded like hard work, whereas the word "Fix" sounded
quick and easy.

HEADLINE: "FIVE ACRES AND INDEPENDENCE"

A book publisher planned to bring out a book on country-home

ownership entitled Five Acres. The publisher tested two titles as
follows:
1. Five Acres
2. Five Acres and Independence
The latter title Five Acres and Independence was the winner by
a wide margin. The book was published and it sold well.
HEADLINE: "HOW I RAISED MYSELF FROM FAILURE TO SUCCESS IN SELLING"

Here are two more book titles that were tested:

1. How I Raised Myself to Success in Selling
2. How I Raised Myself from Failure to Success in Selling
The latter title containing the words from Failure was the
winner. This book became a best seller.

A LESSON FROM MAGAZINE PUBLISHERS

The next time you buy a magazine that has a paper sticker attached
to the front cover, read the article titles printed on the sticker and
then open the magazine and read the actual article titles. Sometimes
the wording is different. For example:
"How to Beat Insomnia Without Sleeping Pills," was the title of a
 How to Appeal to a Mass-Market Audience 19 7
magazine article. "How to Sleep Without Pills" was the shorter and
simpler title printed on the front cover sticker.
It is the job of the circulation department of a magazine to sell
as many copies as possible, and so they sometimes simplify, modify
or reconstruct the titles of articles in order to give them more sales
punch. In doing this, the men and women in the circulation
department are, in effect, working with headlines. They try to make a
good headline better. Sometimes they do this by shortening an
article title, as in the above example. Sometimes they do it by
lengthening a title. Sometimes they change only a word or two.
Sometimes they reconstruct the entire title.
Here are some magazine article titles that were given more
impact by being shortened.
(Original title) Hot Tips on Heating Your Home
(Revised title on How to Cut Fuel Bills
cover sticker)
(Original title) A Smart Shopper's Guide to Bargains
(Revised title) Shopper's Guide to Bargains
(Original title) Three Ways to Mothproof a Marriage
(Revised title) 3 Ways to Save a Marriage
 How to Appeal to a Mass-Market Audience 19 7

(Original title) How to Understand the Perplexing Teen-Ager

(Revised title) How to Understand Your Teen-Ager
(Original title) Which Diet Tips Pay Off?
(Revised title) Diet Tips That Pay Off

Here are some article titles that were given more sales appeal
by being lengthened:
(Original title) When Your Husband's Affection Cools
(Revised title) When Your Husband's Affection Cools—and what to do
about it
(Original title) Birth Control for Men
(Revised title) Now—Safe, Simple Birth Control for Men
(Original title) You Can Read Faster
(Revised title) Read Faster—a 20-Day Plan
(Original title) Key to Fitness at Any Age
(Revised title) Key to Fitness at Any Age for Men and Women

Here are somearticle titles that were given greater interest by

reconstructing:
(Original title) The Smugglers of Misery
(Revised title) Where All the Drugs Come From
(Original title) Building on the Positives in Marriage
(Revised title) 4 Ways to Keep Your Marriage Young
(Original title) High Blood Pressure—New Light on a Hidden Killer
(Revised title) New Protection Against Heart Attack
(Original title) Backyard Gardens Are Back in Style
(Revised title) How to Start a Backyard Garden
(Original title) What You Can Do to Combat Inflation
(Revised title) 10 Ways to Beat the High Cost of Living

SUMMING UP
The next time you write a headline, don't be satisfied with your first
draft. Put it aside overnight and then read it again. See if you can
make it better by shortening it or by lengthening it or by
reconstructing it.
 1 Chapter 15

Advertising is your means of public approach. If you make a product good

enough, even though you live in the depths of the forest, the public will make a
path to your door, says the philosopher. But if you want the public in sufficient
numbers, you would better construct a highway. Advertising is that highway.
William Randolph Hearst

I
t has been said that the greatest crime an advertisement can
commit is to remain unnoticed. Getting advertisements to be
noticed is the job of the layout artist and the art director. But just
as the copywriters who hope to write the Great American Novel
must put away "fine writing" when they are writing copy so must
the art directors put away "fine art" when they are producing an
advertisement. At least, fine art must be made a secondary
consideration. The principal job of an advertisement is to sell
goods. Therefore, you should use layouts and illustrations in which
salesmanship comes first and art second.
An art director described the mental development she went
through in trying to produce advertisements that sold goods. When
she first started in the advertising business, she tried to apply the
things she learned in art school. Her first consideration in making
an ad layout was good taste and good design. Her first
consideration in selecting an illustration was that it should be as
similar as possible to the painting of the old masters. The result
was that her advertisements brought "Ooo's!" and "Ah's!" of delight
 2 CHAPTER 2

from other art directors. Her advertisements were the kind that
won prizes at commercial art exhibitions.
Being practical and knowing that the principal job of an
advertisement is to sell merchandise to a mass audience, this art
director showed her creations to taxi drivers, stenographers,
clerks, and others not directly interested in art. She showed each of
these people a group of advertisements and asked which attracted
them the most. When the first man showed preference for the most
inartistic advertisement, the art director laughed the matter off.
When a female clerk did the same thing, it seemed like a
coincidence.
But when dozens of people passed over the artistic creations
and selected something that looked like a typical Sears Roebuck ad,
the art director began to see a great light. Since then she has
conducted hundreds of tests. She has found that the artistic qualities
of an advertisement are not nearly as important as the ability of the
advertisement to get attention and to drive home a selling point.
Sometimes the rules of fine art must be completely reversed in
producing an effective advertisement.

FINE ART VERSUS COMMERCIAL ART

Many advertising artists are still in the mental stage that this art
director was in before she started showing advertisements to
average people. The trouble with applying the rules of fine art to
advertising is that fine art seeks to please the senses and to tone in
with surroundings. Why are park benches usually painted green
instead of orange? Because green is more artistic. Because green
tones in with the surroundings. But do advertisers want to tone in
with their surroundings? Do manufacturers want to pay $40,000 for a
color page in a magazine just to soothe the artistic senses of the
readers? No. They want to jar the readers and stop them on the spot
—to rouse them and stir them to action.

HOW TO MAKE TYPE WORK FOR YOU

The principal consideration in selecting the style of type for your
headline is that it should be big enough and powerful enough to seize
the attention of the reader.
The principal consideration in selecting type for your copy is
that it should be easy to read. The easiest type for people to read is
the type they read most often. Therefore, set your copy in the
customary, everyday styles of type used in newspaper articles and
magazine articles. Avoid fancy type. Avoid script. Avoid too many
italics. Avoid type that is too faint or too bold. Avoid any style of type
that calls attention to the type itself rather than to the message. Do
not try to create atmosphere with type.
Some art directors use type merely as a decoration. They force
the type into neat squares or oblongs or other shapes. They arrange
it so that all the lines will come out to equal length, like the
inscription on a memorial tablet. Sometimes they use an unusually
light (thin)-face type

3
4 CHAPTER 4

or a script so that the block of copy will not interfere with

the illustration. Sometimes they use the type as part of the
design by setting it in long, hard-to-read lines of fancy type with
wide white spaces between the lines. Devices of this kind may
make an advertisement more artistic, but they do not invite the
eye to read. Remember that people buy magazines and
newspapers to read stories and articles. Therefore, if you want
your copy to be read, set the text like a story or an article.
In selecting type for your advertisements, you would do
well to take a look at the typical mail-order ads that are
repeated again and again, such as figures 1.2 and 11.1. Note the
strong, black, readable type in which the headlines are set. Note
the clear-cut type in which the copy is set. If you do not know
the names of the various styles of type, you will not go wrong if
you tear a good mail-order ad out of a magazine or newspaper
and say to your typesetter: "Please set my ad like this."
In preparing your ad layout, make your headline large
enough and bold enough so that even the most careless glancer
cannot help but catch your message. If your headline is a long
one, set some of the more important words in capitals or extra-
large type, or both, as seen in Figure 4.2.
Large type in a headline has strong attention value. It also
gives force to your message. Consider this headline in ordinary
size type:
ANNOUNCING NEW MODELS
Now see how much more emphatic the headline looks in
larger
type:
ANNOUNCING NEW MODELS
The big type adds strength and force to your
announcement. It makes big news out of it instead of little news.
It gives the impression that you are speaking in a strong voice
instead of in a whisper. An announcement in small type suggests
that you yourself do not think that the announcement is
important.
Even when you have no news—no announcement to make,
you can give your headline a news flavor by putting it in big
type. Consider this headline in ordinary size type:
TO MEN AND WOMEN WHO WANT TO GET AHEAD
This is an interesting headline, but consider how much
more important it becomes when it is spread clear across the
page in large type:
Layouts and Illustrations that Attract the Most Readers 21 3
TO MEN AND WOMEN WHO WANT TO GET AHEAD
The big type seems to add an announcement quality, a news
quality, even though the headline contains no news at all. Do
not, however, use capitals for more than six or seven words in a
row. For almost all adults, "All-Caps" becomes harder to read
easily beyond that point. Set the above headline as:
To men and women who want to get ahead

FEATURING IMPORTANT WORDS IN

HEADLINES
When you are dealing with a lengthy headline, you may not have
room to set all the words in large type. In that case, you can set
part of the headline in large type. For example, here is a long
headline in which none of the words have been featured:
YOU CAN LAUGH AT MONEY WORRIES IF YOU FOLLOW THIS SIMPLE FINANCIAL PLAN
Here is the same headline with certain words featured in
large type. In setting up an ad, these featured words can be
made to stand out on the page and stop readers. Note that the
featured words convey a complete message in themselves. This
is important. Do not feature words that are meaningless by
themselves.
YOU CAN LAUGH AT MONEY WORRIES
if you follow this simple financial plan
Here are four more headlines that have been given the
same treatment. In the first version of each, no words have been
featured. In the second version certain meaningful words have
been set in large type:
(1) To men and women wfio want to
quit work some day
(2) To men and women who want to
QUIT WORK some day
(1) Break up a cold
this quick way
(2) BREAK UP A COLD
this quick way
(1) Thousands now play who
never thought they could
(2) THOUSANDS NOW PLAY who
6 CHAPTER 4

never thought they could

(1) Who else wants a whiter wash
with no hard work
(2) WHO ELSE WANTS A
WHITER WASH with
no hard work
When you hand your ad copy to your layout artist or to your
art director, they will appreciate it if you will indicate which, if
any, important words in your headline should be emphasized or
set in larger type than the rest of the headline.
If you write a long headline, it is wise to include a
meaningful phrase that can be set in extra bold or extra-large
type. If you can do so, it is especially good to arrange your
thoughts so that the meaningful phrase occurs at the beginning
of your headline. This arrangement is used in three out of four
of the headlines listed above. It is not used in the headline "To
men and women who want to QUIT WORK some day."

PICTURES THAT GET ATTENTION

Hundreds of readership surveys have been conducted in which
people have been asked which ads they noticed in various
publications. As a result, it is possible to list certain types of
pictures that are especially effective in getting attention. For
example:
■ Pictures of brides
■ Pictures of babies
■ Pictures of animals
■ Pictures of famous people
■ Pictures of people in odd costumes, such as might be worn
at a masquerade
■ Pictures of people in odd situations, such as a man wearing
an eye patch
■ Pictures that tell a story, such as a little girl trying on her
mother's hat
■ Romantic pictures, such as a man carrying a girl across a
rushing brook
 7 CHAPTER 9

■ Catastrophe pictures, such as car accidents

■ News pictures, such as the launching of a space vehicle
■ Timely pictures, such as pictures of Santa Claus at
Christmas time and pictures of Abraham Lincoln on
Lincoln's birthday
One interesting observation that has come out of
readership surveys is, for most products, men tend to look at
ads containing pictures of men and that women tend to look at
ads containing pictures of women. Apparently, the pictures act
as labels. A man figures that an ad containing a picture of a
man is likely to be an ad for a man's product and that an ad
containing a picture of a woman is likely to be an ad for a
woman's product.
Before the widespread use of readership surveys, some
advertisers believed that the way to stop a male reader was to
show a picture of a bathing beauty. Apparently this technique
stops the wrong readers or it stops them in the wrong mood.
This type of picture may create desire for the girl, but it does
not seem to create desire for the product being advertised.
There was a story from the early days of direct mail about the
man who sent $29.95 in response to a mail-order catalog ad
for a woman's dress. When the dress was delivered, the man
complained. For $29.95 he had expected to get the woman
model who had been shown wearing the dress in the catalog
illustration!

PICTURES THAT SELL

In using information gained from readership surveys, it is wise
to remember that the high attention value of a picture does
not necessarily mean high sales value. In order to have sales
value, the picture should be related to the product.
Some advertisers have wrongly used readership survey
results by illustrating ads with pictures of high attention value
but without relation to the product. For example, if you use a
picture of a bride or a baby in order to get high attention value
for an automobile ad, you will stop the wrong people in the
wrong mood. Chi the other hand, a picture of a bride is fine for
selling wedding gifts such as silverware. And a picture of a
baby is fine for selling baby powder.
Based on sales tests of advertisements, following are
typical examples of pictures that have sales value:
1. Picture of the product. For example, in an automobile ad,
8 CHAPTER l

show a picture of the automobile.

2. Picture of product in use. For example, a woman using a
new garden tool she just bought.
3. Picture of reward of using the product. For example, a
woman admiring a cake she baked, or eating a pudding
she prepared, or wearing the better coat she's always
wanted, as in Figure 15.1.
4. Picture of attainment of ambition. For example, a boy
receiving a diploma. Another example: A correspondence
school ad showing a smiling man handing his wife some
money. Headline: "Here's an extra $50, Grace—I'm
making real money now." (See Caples' classic ad in Figure
15.2.)
5. Picture of an enlarged detail. For example, a magnifying
glass showing an enlargement of a new kind of pen point.
6. Dramatic pictures. For example, an ad for a memory
course showed a picture of a blindfolded man. Headline:
"A startling memory feat you can do."
An error to avoid in the choice of pictures is the use of
pictures that are too far-fetched or too clever. Here is what
sometimes happens. An agency works for years preparing ads
for seagoing cruises. They get tired of pictures of happy people
embarking on a ship or pictures of joyful groups playing
shuffleboard on the deck of a ship. They crave something
different. And so they prepare a cruise ad that features a
picture of a ship's compass or a picture of a ship captain's hat.
This is clever, but too far-fetched. This agency has forgotten
two important truths, namely:
1. To the average person who is glancing rapidly through a
publication, a picture of a compass is an ad for a compass.
A picture of a hat is an ad for a hat.
2. The persons who have finally saved up enough money to
take a cruise are delighted with pictures of people
embarking or pictures of groups playing games aboard
ship. This is just what they are looking for. So don't lose
them or confuse them with pictures of hats or compasses.
Layouts and Illustrations that Attract the Most Readers 21 3

Figure 15.1: Turning on the off-season. The need to generate fur sales in
warm weather spurred this promotion. THE AD: Picture and words
combine to make every element sell. "First time" creates news value.
"Thursday through Saturday" emphasizes action. Add a "TRADE-IN"
possibility, then reinforce and expand in just three copy lines. THE
RESULT: A promotion so different it raised customers' curiosity developed
a new awareness of Evans . . . and brought fur sales not normally made
during summer.

Figure 15.2: One of the All-time Greats. This ad first appeared

in 1919. It is typical of a famous series that built the
Layouts and Illustrations that Attract the Most Readers 21 3

International Correspondence Schools into the largest in the

world. The appeal is as valid today as ever. For example, the
copy says: "The cost of living is mounting month by month. You
can't get along on what you have been making. Somehow
you've simply got to increase your earnings."
Layouts and Illustrations that Attract the Most Readers 21 3

When you are looking for an idea for an ad illustration,

you will often find that a picture of the product will produce
the most sales. For example, the Book-of-the-Month Club
shows pictures of books. If you look through a mail order
catalogue you will find the following:
■ Pictures of sewing machines in sewing machine ads.
■ Pictures of vacuum cleaners in vacuum cleaner ads.
■ Pictures of dresses in ads for dresses.
■ Pictures of shoes in ads for shoes.

The preceding examples are not intended to rule out the

use of dramatic and exciting illustrations. Exciting pictures are
fine if you can think up a picture in which the excitement in the
picture is related to the product.

WHY PHOTOGRAPHS MAKE GOOD

ILLUSTRATIONS
After you have selected the subject matter for your illustration,
it is usually better to use a photograph of the subject instead of
a drawing. For believability, there is nothing as effective as a
photograph. If you do use a drawing or a painting, let your
drawing be as lifelike as possible—as photographic in style as
possible.
The effectiveness of photographs can be illustrated by a
few personal experiences. A woman friend of mine spent half
an hour telling me about her little nephew, whom she adored. I
didn't learn much about the child from what she said. Her
description was too idealized. Then she showed me a large
crayon portrait of a beautiful boy. I looked at the drawing, but
there wasn't enough reality in it for me to tell what he was
really like. Finally, she showed me a snapshot of the youngster
on roller skates. This tiny photograph told me what the boy
was really like. He looked like a real boy with a character of
his own and a nice smile. I could have recognized him. But I
could never have recognized him from the crayon portrait. The
portrait was unreal and unconvincing.
Another time, I was looking through a summer resort
catalog. The advertisements of two resorts attracted me. But
one advertisement had a distinct advantage over the other. It
showed photographs of the resort and the surrounding country.
These photographs told me exactly what the resort was like.
2 Chapter 15

They offered the next best thing to an actual visit of inspection.

The other advertisement showed an idealized drawing of the
hotel and surrounding grounds. It pictured flags flying,
fountains playing, and artistic sailboats on the lake nearby. The
drawing didn't prove a thing. It gave no real information. It
failed to convince. It was plainly just an artist's ideal
conception of a summer hotel.
At another time, I wanted to buy airplane luggage. I
searched through newspapers and magazines for
advertisements. Some of the ads showed drawings of luggage,
some showed paintings, others showed photographs. The ads
with the photographs interested me most. I knew that if I went
to look at that luggage, I would not be disappointed. The
actual luggage would look like the photographs. On the other
hand, if I went looking for luggage of which I had seen only a
drawing or an idealized painting, I might be disappointed. The
actual article might not look anything like its portrait.
A photograph adds real information to an advertisement.
Photographs convince. Photographs are proof. Everybody
knows that when you look at a photograph of a person or a
piece of merchandise or a summer resort, you are looking at a
real likeness. There are little details in photographs that tell so
much—little details of expression or surrounding atmosphere.
A glance at a photograph is the next best thing to seeing the
actual object.
An old Chinese proverb, often misquoted, says, "A good
picture is worth a thousand words." If this is true, then a good
photograph is worth two thousand words.

USING HEADS OF PEOPLE IN ADVERTISEMENTS

Why do mail-order advertisers so often use men's heads and
women's heads as illustrations for advertisements? The
answer is that this type of illustration often brings more sales
than other types.
Pictures of people's heads are good attention-getters. This
is especially true when the model is looking directly at you and
is related to the product or service, for example, a photo of a
user of the product or a graduate of a mail order
correspondence course. A photograph of a person looking you
square in the eye will stop you quicker than a picture of a cake
of soap or a landscape.
Pictures of people's heads are economical in the matter of
Layouts and Illustrations that Attract the Most Readers 21 3

space. All you need to show is the face. This means that if you
have a large space reserved for your illustration, you can
enlarge the face until it fills the space, thus making an
illustration that simply cannot be missed.
If you are using long copy and have only a small space left
for the illustration, there is nothing you can put in that space
that is more eyecatching than a person's head. Many 60-line
mail-order advertisements are so crowded with copy that the
space left for the illustration is no larger than a postage
stamp. Yet this small space is big enough to carry an effective
picture of a man's or woman's head.
What are the other types of illustrations used in
advertisements? Outdoor scenes, groups of people, office
scenes, home scenes, and landscapes are some. Illustrations of
this kind are all right if you have plenty of space in which to
put them. But they cannot be used to good advantage where
you are using quarter-pages or where your copy is long.
Take the case of the landscape picture. You cannot crowd
an effective landscape into a small space. If you show a
miniature of the entire landscape, the details of the picture
become unrecognizable. If you try to cut off parts of the
landscape, you are likely to spoil it.
But suppose you are using a man's head. You can omit his
shoulders and his collar. You can even cut off the top of his
head, leaving only his face, and still have a good illustration. A
person's head, especially if he is looking at you, is one of the
most effective illustrations you can use in small space. It is
also extremely effective when enlarged to fill a larger space.
There are other strong reasons for using people's heads
as advertising illustrations. Take the case of a testimonial
advertisement. If you show a photograph of the person who
wrote the testimonial, the readers will feel more confidence in
the message. They will feel that it must be true, or else the
testimonial givers would not dare to allow their photograph to
be used. Furthermore, as the readers read the testimonial,
they can glance every now and then at the person who wrote
it. They can see what that person looks like. This increases
reader interest and gives a more intimate touch to the
message.

THE ADVERTISER'S LOGOTYPE

An important part of many advertisements is the advertiser's
logotype or name of the advertiser, which is featured in large
4 Chapter 15

type, usually at the bottom of the ad, as in the Mobil editorial-

style ad shown in Figure 15.3.
Layouts and Illustrations that Attract the Most
Readers

Figure 15.3: A public voice for a public corporation. Since

1970, the Mobil Corporation has appeared on the Op-Ed page
of The New York Times. In an instantly recognizable format,
Mobil's Public Affairs Department expresses its views on
business, economic, and public issues. Although many
corporations and individuals use the Op-Ed space, no other
uses this advertising format so consistently—and few use it so
well—to contribute to the debate about topics of importance to
us all.
1 Chapter 15

Sometimes the logotype is the name of the manufacturer

and sometimes it is the name of the product. For example,
here are some manufacturers' names that are often used as
logotypes:
■ General Electric
■ General Motors
■ IBM
■Kodak
Here are some product names that have
frequently been used as logotypes:
■ Tide
■ Nike
■ Chanel
■ Cadillac
The manufacturer repeats the logotype over and over
again in the hope that you will remember it and be favorably
inclined toward that brand when you buy. This is long-haul
advertising as distinguished from short-haul advertising for
immediate sales.
In radio advertising, the manufacturers cannot feature a
logotype in big print and so they often compensate for this by
repeating the name or the name of the product over and over
again. For example, in a one- minute radio commercial for
Colgate Toothpaste, the name Colgate may be repeated many
times.
In TV advertising, the manufacturers can get name
publicity in two ways if they desire, namely, by flashing the
product name in big print on the screen and by having the
name frequently repeated by the announcer.
The effect of the logotype on the consumer is difficult to
measure because it takes months and sometimes years to
produce a measurable result. Yet the effect is known to exist
because tests have shown that people will buy a familiar
product in preference to one that is unfamiliar. They will buy
from a known manufacturer more readily than from an
unknown manufacturer. Therefore, the advertiser's logotype
should not be omitted from an ad except under special
conditions such as the following:
Layouts and Illustrations that Attract the Most Readers 21 3

1. If the name of the product is mentioned in the headline of

an ad, it need not be mentioned again in the logotype.
2. Sometimes a picture of the product with the name printed
on the package takes the place of the logotype.
3. Some mail order advertisers omit the logotype because
they are selling an item or service that is bought only
once in a lifetime, for example, a book or a
correspondence course. These advertisers are advertising
for an immediate sale instead of building up name
publicity over the years. By omitting the logotype, these
concerns reduce their space cost.
4. Readership surveys are mixed about whether editorial
items get higher reading than ads. Much, obviously,
depends on the specific headline or illustration for each.
Nevertheless, some advertisers omit the logotype in order
to produce ads that don't look like ads. For example, ads
that look like cartoons, or ads that look like news items,
articles, as in Figure 10.3, or stories. These ads sacrifice
the advantage of a logotype in order to gain the
advantage of increased readership of their complete text
set in small print.

ADS WITHOUT PICTURES

Some of the best pulling mail order ads have been all-type ads
with no pictures. For example, the ad for the Roth Memory
Course with the headline: "How I Improved My Memory in
One Evening." This ad pulled so well that it ran for years. An
all-type ad for Tecla Pearls was also run for years and became
famous. (See Caples' classic ad in Figure 15.4.)
An all-type ad selling subscriptions to a well-known
newspaper was the best puller of a number of ads tested,
some with illustrations, some without illustrations. The
headline of this ad was: "How to Get the Times Delivered to
Your Home." At the present writing, this ad has been running
for 14 years. No other ad has equalled it in pulling power.
These examples are not intended to sell you off the idea of
using pictures, but to point out that a picture is not a must in
every ad. Pictures cost money, and the space they occupy costs
money. Every illustration should be tested with this question:
Does it add sufficient sales value to warrant its cost?
1 CHAPTER l

Figure 15.4: Written by the World's Highest Paid Copywriter.

Frank Irving Fletcher, the highest-paid ad writer of his time,
was famous for his ability to tell a story in a few words. This is
an example. "But brevity is not desirable in all cases/' he said.
"If a man is interested in buying what you have to sell, you
can't tell him too much."
SUMMING UP
In choosing illustrations for your ads, you will usually get
more sales if you cash in on the experience of mail-order
advertisers and department stores whose existence depends
on ads that produce direct, traceable sales.
Avoid weird, outlandish, or far-fetched pictures that have
nothing to do with the product or service you are selling. Use
pictures that attract buyers, not curiosity seekers. Here are
some safe bets:

1. Pictures of the product.

2. Pictures of the product in use.
3. Pictures of people who use the product.
4. Pictures showing the reward of using the product.

The American standard of living is due in no small

measure to the imaginative genius of advertising,
which not only creates and sharpens demand, hut
also, by its impact upon the competitive process,
stimulates the never- ceasing quest of improvement
in quality of the product.
Adlai E. Stevenson

O
ne of my earliest discoveries in mail order advertising was
that different products have different space size
requirements.
For example, a reducing belt was sold at a profit by
using small, 60- line, single column mail-order ads (in
newspaper measurement, there are 14 "lines" per inch) with
2
Layouts and Illustrations that Attract the Most Readers 21 3

the headline FAT MEN. The illustration showed a fat man

being pulled in at the midsection by a broad belt around his
waist. When full-page ads were used to advertise this prod-
uct, the per-belt selling cost was increased. In other words,
the full-page ads did not bring in enough extra orders to pay
for the extra space.
On the other hand, a treatment for growing hair was sold
profitably by mail-order by using full-page magazine ads. We
tested some 60-line ads for this product, but these small ads
failed to bring in enough mail-order sales to make a profit.
What is the reason for this situation? The copy chief of
the agency that handled this advertising said:
The small ads worked well in the case of the reducing
belt because a reducing belt is easy to explain. A picture
of a man being pulled in at the waistline and a few lines
of copy are all that is needed to make clear how the
product works. On the other hand, there is a lot of
skepticism in men's minds regarding hair-growing
treatments. It requires a long, scientific explanation to
make clear how the product works and a lot of testimoni-
als from satisfied customers to prove that the treatment
really does work. Therefore, full-page ads are required.
A small ad does not give you enough room to do a
convincing selling job for a hair-growing treatment.
A third class of products are those that can be sold
profitably in both small- and large-size ads. For example, in
writing mail-order ads
How to Make Small Ads Pay 21 7
for the U.S. School of Music Correspondence Course, we
found that various sizes of space were profitable, from full
pages down to one-inch, single-column ads.
In considering the question of whether to use small ads or
large ads, there are arguments for and against both. There are
limitations of small ads and there are also advantages. You
should bear in mind the limitations and advantages listed
below:

TEN LIMITATIONS OF SMALL ADS

1. Small ads don't impress your dealers as much as large ads.
2. You can't include a long list of names and addresses of your
dealers.
3. You can't use color in small ads. It would be too expensive.
4. You can't show an appetite-arousing picture of a lemon pie
or a chocolate cake.
5. You can't, in most instances, create a large volume of sales
quickly.
6. You can't create the impression of importance or bigness as
well as you can with large ads.
7. You can't show a landscape picture or a family group
admiring the new living room furniture.
8. You can't show an effective picture of your new model car
or refrigerator.
9. You can't use certain effective editorial techniques, such as
comic strips or ads that look like magazine articles.
10. You can't get the best positions for your small ads in
magazines or in newspapers.

TEN ADVANTAGES OF SMALL ADS

1. You can run a whole series of small ads for the price of a
single full page. Thus, small ads enable you to advertise
frequently at low cost. Note, however, that smaller space
costs proportionately more per inch. Thus a 1/6-page ad
(1/2 of a magazine column) may cost the equivalent of 1/4
of a full page space charge.
 1 CHAPTER 2

2. If you make a variety of products, you can feature a

different product in each ad in a series of small ads.
3. If your product has a variety of uses, you can feature
different uses in different ads.
4. Instead of running a series of pages in a single publication,
you can advertise in six or more publications by using
small ads.
5. You can gain flexibility by putting part of your
appropriation into big ads and part into small ads.
6. You can offer free booklets, literature, samples, and
catalogs. You can make mail-order sales.
7. You can get leads for the sales staff.
8. In newspapers, you can get special paid position, such as
running your wedding-ring ad alongside the engagement
notices, your baby-carriage ad alongside the birth notices.
9. You can get high readership by using such editorial
techniques as small cartoons, news items, and picture-
caption ads.
10. You can profitably advertise so-called limited-market
products or services as illustrated by headlines such as
these: Accounting, Corns, Drafting, False Teeth, Feet Hurt,
Hearing Aids, Kill Rats, Loans, Maternity Dresses,
Shorthand, Stenotype, Toothache. The reason is this: There
is not enough profit in com remedies, for example, to
support full-page ads. Furthermore, if the reader of a
publication does not have a com, your full-page ad, no
matter how attractive, will not sell him a com remedy. On
the other hand, if the reader does have a com that is
bothering him, he will be stopped by the one-word
headline, “CORNS," in a small ad. Since you cannot predict
when the reader's corns will be troublesome, you are
better off with a small ad in every issue of a publication
than with a big ad once in a while.

SUGGESTIONS FOR MAKING SMALL ADS PAY

Use telegraphic language, as if you were sending a cable and
you had to pay $5 a word. For example, the sentence, "We will
be glad to mail you a copy of our free booklet on request," can
be condensed to two words, "Free Booklet." Sometimes a single
How to Make Small Ads Pay 2
word "Booklet" is used. A classified ad describing farms for sale
ended with the terse offer, "Bklt."
One way to produce a good small ad is to take a big ad and
boil down the copy. Cut out the introduction. Cut out the
sentences with the least selling power. Omit all unnecessary
words. Use short words in place of long words. This is often
done with mail-order ads. By the time a page ad is cut down to
a half-column there is not an ounce of fat left in the ad. It is all
bone and muscle, and it frequently pulls several times its
weight in sales.
But suppose you don't have a big ad to cut down. Then
write a long piece of copy today and cut it down tomorrow.

HEADLINES OF SMALL ADS

If you can find a one-word headline that will attract the right
prospects, such as "Accounting," "Deaf," or "Loans," it will
probably be your best headline. The reason is because it can be
set in big type without taking up much room. However, never
feature a meaningless word such as "If" or "Because" just to get
a one-word headline. It is more important for your headline to
mean something than it is for it to be brief. If your product
doesn't lend itself to a one-word stopper headline, try to write a
headline in two, three, or five words.
Good phrases to use in small ad copy are those that
condense a lot of meaning into brief space. Examples:
$250 a Week Anybody Can Learn
Learn in 6 Weeks Amaze Your Friends
Our 36th Year Money Back if Not Delighted
Since 1893 Equipment Included
New 100,000 Users
Fun-packed Trial Plan
Now You Can Test Yourself
15 Minutes a Day Free 48-page Book
Mrs. E. C. Made $65 No Obligation
No Special Talent Needed Send No Money
Age No Obstacle Write TODAY

ILLUSTRATIONSI^ORSMALL ADS
Question: Should you use an illustration? If you are using a line
How to Make Small Ads Pay 3
drawing or a picture-caption ad, your ad will be mostly
illustration. In the standard type of ad, however, you should
evaluate the illustration carefully
4 CHAPTER 2

before using. Reason: You can put a lot of selling copy into the
space usually occupied by an illustration. If a picture is needed
to show the product or to make clear the use of the product,
put it in. If the illustration is appropriate and compact, such as
the head of a nurse for a course in nursing, put it in. Otherwise,
omit the illustration to make the ad smaller or to allow more
room for copy.

AD STYLE VERSUS EDITORIAL STYLE

There are two opposite techniques you can use to prepare small
ads. You can use either one, but not both at the same time.
Technique Number One is to make your ad look like an ad. Use
all the ad pro's tricks—stopper headline, long copy, small print,
jam-packed layout. But use these tricks so effectively that
prospects will be stopped and sold in spite of the fact it is
obviously an ad.
Technique Number Two is to make your ad look like
editorial material, such as a cartoon or a picture-caption item,
or like a news item. This technique will get you a higher
readership rating. But you have to omit all your standard ad
tricks such as one-word headlines or coupons. If you use ad
tricks in an editorial ad, you will simply be telling people, "This
is an ad." You will let the cat out of the bag before the cat is in
the bag.

CHECKING RESULTS FROM SMALL ADS

Key your ads by telling readers to write a certain department
number to obtain a booklet or sample, or offer to sell the
product by mail at full price. By keying your ads, you can tell
which ads, which publications, and which seasons of the year
are more resultful for you. Then after a while you can stop
spending money on the less successful ads and spend that
money running your best ads in the most responsive publi-
cations.

TEST YOUR ADS

Prepare several different ads and run them with a keyed offer in
one of the publications on your list in order to find out which ad
How to Make Small Ads Pay 5
brings the most replies. Better still, do a split-run test so that
two ads can be tested on the same day, under identical
conditions. Newspapers in many cities offer split-run testing.
Many magazines also offer split-run testing, though some of
them limit split runs to full-page ads only. See Chapter 18 for a
detailed explanation of split-run testing.
One final word: Publications and agencies should not fear
that the use of small ads will reduce advertising appropriations.
You can spend just as much on small ads as on large ads. You
simply run the small ads more often and in more publications.
One advertiser who recently shifted to small ads said, "These
little ads are making our sales go up faster than the big ads did.
If this continues, we will be able to spend more money on
advertising."
Small ads enable small concerns to advertise who
otherwise could not afford to advertise at all. These small
advertisers often become big advertisers!
So do not underestimate the power of small ads.
Remember that David slew Goliath with a small pebble. Two
speeches were made at Gettysburg, but the short one was
remembered longer.

GETTING RESULTS FROM CLASSIFIED ADS

All over the United States in the classified ad departments of
newspapers, men and women ad takers sit at telephones and
write insertion orders for ads that come in by phone.
Sometimes an advertiser will specify that the ad is to run three
times or five times, thereby earning a lower rate. And
sometimes an advertiser will telephone and cancel the ad after
one or two appearances because the merchandise, or whatever,
has been sold. It is then that the ad takers get stories of the
results produced by classified ads. These result stories are
often published in the papers.
For example, here is a classified ad that ran in The New
York Times:
6 CHAPTER 4

Regarding this ad The Times reported the results as

follows:
The advertisement for Mrs. America Productions, Inc.—a firm
that produces pageants and license rights to the Mrs. America
name in each state—appeared in the "Business Opportunities"
columns of The New York Times. Only two days after it ran—
even before a contract was signed—the advertiser had the
$10,000 he had asked for.

Here are stories that were published by newspapers:

A family that ran a "House for Sale" ad in Baltimore said: "We
had a full house. Over 40 prospects called."
A sailboat owner ran this ad in the Philadelphia Bulletin:
"PENGUIN with trailer. Exc. cond. $500." ... "I was swamped
with offers," he said.
A Norfolk woman ran this ad in the Virginian-Pilot: "Seven
months old male, half German Shepherd, all shots, Va. license,
rabies tag, $150." ... "Sold my dog to the first person who came
by" she said.
A Montana rancher ran this ad in the Rapid City, S.D., Journal:
"Married man for year 'round job on southeastern Montana
cattle ranch." The rancher said, "We had very good results—six
or seven responses."
A coffee shop owner said he got 60 calls from this ad in the
Washington, D.C. Post: "COOK—For a small downtown
cafeteria, 5 days a wk., gd salary & benefits for the right man or
woman."

To promote the use of classified advertising the Buffalo

Courier Express reprints successful ads and tells readers the
results obtained and the low cost of the advertising. Examples:
"SNOW TIRES, 2 Atlas Weatherguard 815x15 on Ford wheels,
used 1 season, $80 pair." ... 5 calls first day. Ad cost $11.10.
How to Make Small Ads Pay 7
"FRANCISCAN china, Desert Rose pattern, matching crystal,
service for 8. Bargain price." ... 22 calls first day. Ad cost $9.35.
"RUGS, 1 each: 14x12 and 9x15. Reasonable" ... 15 calls first
day. Ad cost $7.60.

The Baltimore News American promoted the use of tiny

classified ads using abbreviated copy and occupying only a
single line of space in the newspaper. The paper reported that
all of the following ads were successful.
BIKE—Boys, 24" $20.
PIANO—Upright, rea.
WIG—Champagne beige, $25.
14' Boat, trailer. $50.
Classified advertising has a long history of success. Today,
this form of communication is bigger than ever. The daily New
York Times often carries more than a dozen pages of classified
ads; and on Sunday up to 100 pages. Another stronghold of
classified ads is the Los Angeles Times. A newspaper sales
representative figured that it would take an average reader
more than 24 hours to read all the classified ads in a single
daily issue of that paper.
Classified advertising offers the advantage of low cost,
flexibility, and selectivity. You can run your ad in the city where
your prospects are located and you can run it under the
classified heading that selects the buyers of your product or
service.

The prosperity of every country in the world is directly in

relation to the amount of advertising.
Col. Robert R. McCormick
8 CHAPTER 4

T
wenty tested advertisements are described in this chapter. Ten
were successful in getting sales. Ten were unsuccessful. See if
you can pick the successes. Correct answers, with the lessons
we can learn from their success, can be found on pages 231-
233.
Imagine for the next ten minutes that you are the creative
director of an advertising agency specializing in tested
advertising. Your agency has ten accounts, and each account
needs new copy. You have called your copy staff into conference
and you have asked them to submit ideas. You have received 20
advertising suggestions—two on each account. It is now up to
you to decide which ideas you will use and which you will
discard.
The 20 suggestions are arranged in pairs below. Each pair
consists of a success and a failure. Headline, illustration, and
offer are included in every case. Where it is not obvious, the
copy plot is explained.
Out of each pair of suggestions, as you go along, you are to
check on page 225 (or on a copy) the one suggestion you
believe would bring the best results. Then turn to pages 231-
233 where the headlines of the successful advertisements are
listed, and see how many you got right.
There are no catch questions in this "test"—no large
 How to Make Small Ads Pay 9
displays of the word "Free." No extra prominence has been
given to the offer in one advertisement and not to the other.
Each pair of advertisements was tested in magazines or
newspapers under conditions as nearly similar as possible. The
inquiries were followed up by direct mail or by a sales
representative's call. The pulling power or lack of pulling power
of each advertisement rests mainly on its headline and illus-
tration.
Bear in mind also that in every case the pulling power of
the two advertisements differed, not by a narrow margin, but
by a wide margin. The advertisements that failed were bad
failures. They were used only once. The advertisements that
were successful were highly successful. They were repeated
again and again before their effectiveness wore out.

□
Probable Ad Test Winners
1A IB

□
□
2A

□
2B

□ □
3A 3B

□ □
4A 4B

□ □
5A 5B

□ □
6A 6B

□ □
7A 7B

□ □
8A 8B

□ □
9A 9B

□ □
10A 10
B

If you "flunk" this test, you are in good company. Some of

America's most successful—and highest paid—copywriters
wrote the losing ads. Of course many of them wrote the
10 CHAPTER 4

winning ads too! As always, the real winners are the ones who
test. .. Test. .. TEST.
How to Make Small Ads Pay 11
Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers 6 1
14 CHAPTER l
 Thirty-five Proven Formulas for Writing Headlines and Direct Mail Teasers 6 1

ANSWERS TO BRAIN TEASERS

Below are the headlines of the 20 keyed advertisements that were
tested by actual sales response. Each headline is marked successful
or unsuccessful. See how many you guessed right.
(1) (a) To a $25,000 man or woman who would like to be making
$50,000 [successful]
(b) Here's proof that this training pays financially [unsuccessful]
The headline of the successful ad is specific, mentions money
twice, and contains a strong indication of increased earnings. The
headline of the losing ad features the word "financially," which is not
as effective as specific dollar figures.
 16 Chapter 15

(1) (a) "60 days ago they called me "Baldy"' [successful]

(b) If I can't grow hair for you in 30 days you get this check
[unsuccessful]

In the successful ad, the picture of the bald-headed man and the word
"Baldy" selected the right audience at a glance. The copy contains
evidence of results. In the losing ad, the picture does not select the audi-
ence and the headline suggests that the remedy may not work.
(2) (a) Here's one question you shouldn't ask your wife [unsuc
cessful]
(b) Get rid of money worries for good [successful]
The headline of the successful ad contains a promise of a benefit. The
other headline is purely a curiosity headline and fails to promise a benefit.
(3) (a) "A few months ago I couldn't play a note" [unsuccessful]
(b) Here's a strange way to learn music [successful]
The successful headline promises a benefit ("learn music") and
arouses curiosity with the words "strange way."
(4) (a) A vacation that lasts the rest of your life [unsuccessful]
(b) How you can retire on a guaranteed income for life [successful]

The successful headline selects the right audience and promises a

benefit. The other headline lacks clarity and is misleading. It attempts to
be clever by describing retirement as a vacation that lasts the rest of your
life.
(5) (a) "How $27 started me on the road to $75,000" [successful]
(b) Some $75,000 jobs are looking for applicants [unsuccessful]
The successful headline selects the right audience and offers a spe-
cific benefit. The other headline reads like a help-wanted ad and selects
the wrong audience.
(6) (a) This fascinating literary circle now open to you [unsuccess
ful]
(b) Can you talk about books with the rest of them? [successful]
The successful headline selects the right audience for a book- review
magazine and implies a promise—namely, that you will be able to talk
about books if you read the magazine. The other headline is not entirely
clear and is misleading. It suggests that you are being invited to join a
literary club.
(7) (a) Why good dancers are more popular than "Walk-Arounds"
[unsuccessful]
(b) "How a faux pas made me popular" [successful]
The words "made me popular" imply a promise of a benefit. The
French phrase, faux pas, arouses curiosity, which is increased by the pic-
ture of the masked couple. The unsuccessful headline does not promise a
benefit.
 Ten Brain Teasers 17
(8) (a) Thousands suffer from sick nerves and don't know it
[unsuccessful]
(b) Have you these symptoms of nerve exhaustion? [successful]
The successful headline contains the word "you," and arouses
curiosity. It also implies the promise of a remedy for nervous ailments. The
other headline is simply a statement of a fact.
(9) (a) How to Get Rid of an "Inferiority Complex" [successful]
(b) The writings in these immortal books are as stirring as the mightiest
deeds of history [unsuccessful]
The successful headline contains a specific promise of a personal
benefit.

Perhaps you scored 100 percent correct answers on this test. If so,
you are to be congratulated. You are a better judge of pulling power than
some copywriters who have spent years in advertising. Perhaps you scored
50 percent or less. If so, don't be discouraged, because all ten of the
advertisements that failed were considered good enough to test by the
agencies and clients working on these accounts. If the advertisements had
not been considered good, no money would have been spent to test them.
It is this difficulty of judging results in advance that makes advertising, as
one advertising professional said, "The hardest, most interesting, most
exasperating, satisfying, worthwhile, and exciting business that ever
engaged the talents of a group of people."
Advertising can never be an exact science, like mathematics or
chemistry, but it can become more accurate and more scientific than it is
today. The purpose of this book is to help make advertising more scientific.
Advertising can never become completely accurate, however, because of
the human element involved—in advertising you are dealing with the
minds and the emotions of human beings, and these will always be, to a
certain extent, unstable and unmeasurable. That is why it is necessary to
test, test, test—to test copy, media, position in publications, seasonal
variation, and time of day in broadcast advertising. Test everything on a
small scale before you spend money on a large scale.
Mail-order advertisers have learned this lesson over and over again.
For example, a new mail-order advertisement is prepared. The copywriter
is enthusiastic about it, the copy chief thinks it is good, the account
executive is sure it will pull, and the client rubs her hands in expectation of
the orders she is going to get. The advertisement runs. The orders fail to
come in. The experts were wrong—all wrong. Yet they have been working
on mail-order copy for years. They are close students of what pays and
what does not pay. If anybody should be able to judge in advance the
pulling power of a piece of copy, mail-order advertisers should. Yet they
were all completely mistaken. It is experiences like this that teach
scientific-minded advertisers to beware of limiting themselves to theories
and stick to facts.
The reverse of the above experience sometimes happens. A new
 18 CHAPTER 12

How to Make Store Coupons Effective

advertisement runs in which few have confidence. And the orders pour in.
That's what makes tested advertising one of the most exciting and
challenging fields in this exciting business. The rules are hard to learn.
Sometimes it seems as if there are no rules. But at least there is this one
great rule:
Test everything. Doubt everything. Be interested in theories, but don't spend a
large sum of money on a theory without spending a little money to test it first.

I know that half of my advertising is wasted but I do not know which half
lohn Wanamaker

W
hat kind of headlines attract the most readers? What kind of pictures get
the most attention? What sales appeals sell the most merchandise? What
kind of copy will be most successful in persuading people to buy your
product or service? You'll see an example that tested all of these to
produce the successful ad in Figure 18.1.
This book has given you the findings of years of experience and the
results of millions of dollars spent in discovering answers to these ques-
tions. But there will always be new questions coming up. You will write
new headlines and new copy. You will think up new sales appeal and
new illustration ideas.
Which of your new ideas will be the most effective? There will be
times when you will want to subject your ideas to some sort of testing,
in order to make sure that the dollars you spend in advertising will bring
the best possible results.
On the following pages there are described 17 different kinds of
advertising tests you can use. Included are detailed descriptions of cer-
 Ten Brain Teasers 19

tain tests that have been briefly mentioned before. Which—and how
many—of these tests you should select will depend on the nature of your
problem and the amount of time and money you can afford to devote to
testing.
1. PUT YOUR NEWLY WRITTEN AD ASIDE UNTIL THE NEXT DAY
The simplest way to test a piece of advertising copy you have just writ-
ten is to put it aside and read it the next day. In rereading your own
copy a day later, you can approach it with a cold, analytical mind, almost
as if you were an outsider reading somebody else's copy. Certain errors
that were not apparent to you when you were writing with speed and
enthusiasm may become clear to you as you read calmly and objectively.
 20 CHAPTER 12

How to Make Store Coupons Effective

Figure 18.1: Being different isn't enough, but it can help. You'd never suspect from the
headline and picture that Canyon Ranch has a plot to make you healthier. But it has! And
in the highly competitive "health ranch" market, this deliberately "different," curiosity-
raising campaign is a rousing success. Tested throughout 1994 against another version
with the headline "New life form discovered in Massachusetts" and a picture of a face
wearing swimming goggles, "Feel pleasure" proved 97.4 percent better in generating
inquiries and 50 percent better in conversion to sales.
Also, you may be able to improve the style of the piece you have
written. You may think of short words that can replace long words. You
may find unnecessary phrases that can be omitted. You may find long
sentences that can be broken up into short sentences. You may find that
your message can be speeded up by omitting the first paragraph. You may
discover that your copy should have an action paragraph added at the end.
Your chances of producing a good ad will be improved if you will write
several ads instead of just one. Your chances of finding a good headline
 Ten Brain Teasers 21

will be increased if you will write many headlines. Then you can select the
best copy and the best headline.

1. Ask Somebody to Read Your Ad Copy Aloud to You

Some writers test their copy by reading it aloud to another person. This
method has advantages, but it is not as good a test as having another
person read your copy aloud to you.
The trouble with reading your own copy to another person is that you
know in advance what message you want to convey. You know what words
to emphasize in order to bring out your meaning. You know how to make a
long sentence sound simple by pausing at the proper places. Other readers
do not know these things. They approach your copy with a cold mind. It is
up to your copy to warm them up. You can tell by their tone whether your
copy has interest or emotion or humor. You can tell by the smoothness of
their reading whether your copy is clear.
While other persons are reading your copy aloud, you should sit with
pad and pencil and make notes. If they stumble over a sentence, you
should assume that this is your fault, not theirs. You should rewrite the
sentence. If an idea is not clear to them, you should assume that it will not
be clear to other people. You should make your idea clear or omit it.
By asking somebody else to read your copy aloud, you can get a
quicker reaction to it than by putting it aside to reveal yourself the next
day. The reader you choose can be your boss, your spouse, your associate,
your assistant, or the person in the next office.

2. OPINION TEST BY INTERVIEW

An opinion test consists of showing another person some ad layouts or a
list of headlines or some samples of copy and saying, "Which do you like
best?" or "Which ad would you be most likely to read?" Experiments have
shown that it doesn't matter how you phrase the question.
22 CHAPTER 4

The important thing is to give your respondent at least two

things to choose from. The reason is that since most people want
to please, they are likely to respond favorably to the ad. If you
show just one ad and say, "Here is an ad I wrote ... please tell me
what you think of it," most people will reply, "I think it's good."
This gets you nowhere. You should hand your respondent two or
more ads and say, "Which do you like best?"
If you are testing a list of headlines on several people, it is
good to hand each person a clean copy of the headlines and say,
"Please check with pencil the headlines you like best." Don't let
one person see the check marks made by another person. Their
judgment may be swayed in favor of a headline that other people
have previously checked.
Where possible, opinion tests are refined by talking only to
prospects. Show food ads to housewives, pipe-tobacco ads to pipe
smokers, dog-food ads to dog owners.
Opinion tests can be extended to any degree you choose. You
can interview five, ten, or 20 people. You can hire focus groups
and other survey reporters who will show your ad layouts to 100
people. You can conduct opinion tests in several cities.
IMPORTANCE OF SALES TESTS
No matter how much you refine an opinion test, you should
remember that it is subject to error because it is based on
opinions. It is not a sales test. In those cases where it has been
possible to apply both opinion testing and sales testing to the
same set of ads, it has been found that the two methods do not
always obtain the same results. Here are some of the reasons for
this:
1. People avoid voting for an ad that reflects discredit on
themselves. For example, suppose you want to test the
following appeals for toothpaste:
a) How to avoid tooth decay
b) How to get rid of bad breath
The appeal "bad breath" will not win in an opinion test, but it
might win in a sales test.
2. Most people believe that an ad has to have a picture in it in
order to be a good ad. Therefore an all-type ad will not win in
an opinion test. An all-type ad will, however, sometimes beat
an illustrated ad in a sales test.
3. People tend to vote for so-called "clever" ads in an opinion
test. However, simple ads usually beat "clever" ads in a sales
test.
4. An opinion test can be upset by a split vote.
Seventeen Ways to Test Your Advertising 23
Here is how a split-vote error can occur. Suppose women are
asked to select the better of two ad layouts, namely (1) layout
with picture of a child versus (2) layout with picture of a home.
Let us say that the score is 60 percent for the child picture and
40 percent for the home picture. Result: Child picture wins.
Suppose, however, you decide to "refine" the test by
substituting two layouts with child pictures in place of one layout
with a child picture because you want to try a boy picture versus
a girl picture. The layout with the home picture remains the
same.
You now show the housewives three layouts and ask which
they like best. The 60 percent of the housewives who previously
voted for the child picture will now split their votes and you will
get a result like this:
30 percent for boy picture
30 percent for girl picture
40 percent for home
picture

Result: Home picture wins. Note that the result of the three-
way test reverses the result of the previous two-way test.
The proper way to do the preceding test is in two stages, as
follows:
1. First you should test a home picture versus a child picture.
2. Then, in a separate set of interviews, you should test a boy
picture versus a girl picture.
You may say at this point, "Why should I do an opinion test if
it can sometimes produce a wrong answer?"
There are several things to consider in this regard.
1. An opinion test is quick and easy and frequently gives you the
right answer.
2. An opinion test is inexpensive.
3. Due to pressure of closing dates, an opinion test is sometimes
the only testing method you will have time for.
4. Some ad pros claim that only an actual sales test is
worthwhile. But even a sales test can sometimes produce a
wrong answer due to hidden factors you do not know about.
5. An opinion test gives you a chance to talk to the people who
are voting on your ads. You may learn things you didn't
suspect. You may uncover new copy ideas you forgot to
include.
The value of opinion testing can be summed up as follows: An
 24 CHAPTER 9

opinion test, if properly handled, can help you get nearer to the
truth, although it may not always give you the absolute truth.
One company president used an opinion test as a sales
device. He wanted to reach certain influential executives with his
sales message so he prepared several ads and mailed sets of
proofs to a list of prospects. In an accompanying letter, the
president said, "Will you please look at the enclosed ads and then
check on the enclosed postcard the headlines of the ad you think
I should run in the trade press?"
In this way, the president induced a number of his best
prospects to read several of his ads even before the ads were
published.
4. MAIL-ORDER SALES TEST
A national advertiser recently asked this question: "In testing ads
by mail response, when should you use a coupon, and when
should you use a hidden offer?"
Answer: You should use a hidden offer when you don't want
too many replies and when you want to avoid replies from
curiosity seekers. (See page 243.)
You should use a coupon when you want a lot of replies, and
when the replies are of real value to you. For example:
1. When the coupon is an order blank and represents an actual
mailorder sale.
2. When the coupon secures a lead for a sales representative.
3. When you want to distribute a large number of booklets or
samples.
4. When the coupon is a questionnaire and you want to find out
the age or business position or other information about your
readers.
The coupon stimulates replies as follows:
1. By calling attention to your offer.
2. By making it easy for the reader to reply.
3. By giving the readers a reminder they can tear out and carry
with them to your place of business.
Among the most frequent users of testing via coupons are the
mailorder advertisers who sell books, novelties, audio and video
recordings, or other merchandise by including a coupon order
form in each ad.
In the case of these advertisers, every ad is a sales test. The
testing method consists of trying several different ads and then
repeating over and over the ads that bring the most sales per
dollar of space cost.
Seventeen Ways to Test Your Advertising 25
Mail-order advertisers test not only copy, but media, various
positions in media, space size, and seasonal variation.
Here are examples of some of the selling devices included in
the coupons of mail-order ads:
Send check or money order.
Charge my credit card.
Bill me.
Enroll me as a member.
Send me booklet, sample or catalog—free or for [small amount]
(Sales are made by direct mail follow-up.)

5. TESTING ADS AND MAILINGS WITH COUPONS PLUS CALLS BY SALES

REPRESENTATIVE
Some items are too high in price to be sold via mail order
coupons. For example, an office machine, as shown in Figure
18.2, home improvements, life insurance policies, mutual funds,
and correspondence courses. In such cases the coupons offer free
literature and a sales representative calls on the prospect. Here
are typical coupon offers.
Please send free book, "How to Succeed."
Without Obligation, send booklet "How to Fence Your Home."
Send information on Life Insurance.
This plan gives you a double check on the selling power of
each ad you test. First you count the number of coupons each ad
produces, and second, you count the number of sales resulting
from each ad.
Over a period of time, you can also determine the quality of
the coupons you receive. You may find that certain publications
bring higher quality leads than others. You may discover that ads
featuring a free offer in the headline will bring lower quality leads
than ads that subordinate the free offer.
6. TESTING ADS WITH COUPONS THAT OFFER SAMPLES OR LITERATURE
Most consumer advertisers do not wish to follow up coupon leads
with telemarketing or a call by a sales representative, for
example, advertisers of beauty products, household products,
drug products, or the majority of vacation trips. These concerns
do, however, have an interest in distributing literature or samples
and in checking on the pulling power of their copy. There are two
approaches to this type of testing:
26 CHAPTER l

Figure 18.2: A gifted mailing... Sometimes it takes an IQ Test to get prospects

to think about your product. Pitney Bowes' reps wanted well-qualified leads.
To get them, the IQ mailing demonstrates how smart PB's "Smart Image"
copiers are by asking office managers to give their photocopiers (not
themselves) the "IQ Test Enclosed." The brief letter that begins and ends with
a free gift offer, the 60- second fun-to-score test, and the colorful score sheet
and reply card resulted in overwhelming success. IQ outpulled the less
involving "Can You Afford . . control by 138 percent in response while
converting to sales at a higher rate! 1st Place, 1995 CADM TEMPO Award.
1. You can use a copy-testing plan in which you select a
publication that is typical of your entire list of publications
Seventeen Ways to Test Your Advertising 27
and pretest all new ads in that publication. After tabulating
results, you can run the best-pulling ads in your entire list of
publications.
2. You can use a less specialized approach in which you key all
your coupons and keep a record of coupon returns and cost
per coupon. You can study these records from time to time in
order to learn which ads and which publications are getting
the highest response.

Here are sample offers taken from magazines. Note that they
have a cash requirement in order to screen out curiosity seekers.
Please send free 30-day supply of vitamins. I enclose $2.50 for
packing and postage.
Free . . . terry-cloth apron with purchase of sponge mop. A $2.95
value, it's yours by sending a paid receipt (or sales slip) with 50tf
to cover mailing.
Enclosed is $1 for custom-made drapery swatches and directions
for measuring.
Here are some typical offers of literature. Some have a cash
requirement and some are free.
Send for Free Vacation Guide
Free! Travel Planning Map of America
Please send your book, "How to Build a Flexboard Garage."
I enclose 501 in coin.
Enclosed is 50tf for my copy of "Planning and Decorating Your
Dream Bathroom."

7. TESTING ADS WITH HIDDEN OFFERS

Question: When should you test your copy with a hidden
offer instead of featuring your offer in a coupon?
Answer: (1) When you do not want too many replies, (2)
When you want to avoid replies from professional coupon-
clippers, and (3) When you want to find out if anyone is actually
reading your ad.
When you are going to test a series of ads, the first matter to
be decided is which offer to use. One advertiser said, "I'd like to
test my copy, but I don't know what to offer."
The fact is that on almost all propositions you can use one of
the following offers:
1. A sample of the product.
2. A booklet about the product or service.
On certain propositions, it is difficult to get sufficient replies.
On others, it is so easy to get replies that you may have to take
steps to reduce their number.
28 HARD-TO-GET REPLIES CHAPTER 12

An advertising
ADVERTISING agency
A DISINFECTANT copywriter wanted to test a lot of different
selling appeals for a headache remedy. He put together some
small all-type ads measuring 75 lines (5-1/3") by two columns.
Each appeal to be tested was featured in the headline of one of
these ads. For example:
Ad No. 1. Quick Relief for Nervous Headache
Ad No. 2. Why Thousands Use this Headache Remedy
The agency wanted to get at least a hundred replies from
each test ad. Experience shows that a hundred replies is about
right. If you average only ten replies per test ad, the results may
not be dependable. On the other hand, if you average a thousand
replies per test ad, you may find that the cost of mailing out
samples is unnecessarily high.
The ad manager was dubious about including an offer of a
free bottle of the headache remedy. She said, "We may be
swamped with requests for free bottles. Let's offer a free booklet
instead."
The agency preferred to offer a sample of the product so that
the test would approach the characteristics of an actual sales
test. They prevailed on the ad manager to permit a test of a low-
pressure offer in a single ad. The pulling power of the offer was
reduced in three ways as follows:
1. Instead of offering a full-size bottle, the ad offered a sample
bottle.
2. Instead of offering the sample bottle free, the copy required
the
reader to send 50tf.
3. The offer was completely hidden in the last paragraph of the
copy.
There was no subhead featuring the offer.
An all-type ad containing this offer was run in a single
newspaper with half a million circulation. The copywriter waited
nervously for results. He feared that his client, the ad manager,
would be annoyed if the ad brought too many replies.
Result: The ad brought only two replies.
The next step was to run an ad containing the following
offer: "Just tear out this ad and send it with your name and
address and we will mail you a regular $l-size bottle absolutely
FREE." Result: The ad brought slightly over a hundred replies,
which was about the amount desired. The ad agency then
proceeded to run other ads with different headlines in order to
test the comparative pulling power of various sales appeals.
Seventeen Ways to Test Your Advertising 29
Regarding this test, one copywriter said: "Hidden offers of
food samples or soap samples sometimes pull hundreds or even
thousands of replies. Why is it so difficult to get people to write
for a headache remedy?"
Answer: A headache remedy appeals to a narrower audience
than does an offer of food or soap. Also, if people do not have a
headache, they may not bother to read a headache ad. And if they
do have a headache, they will probably go to a drugstore and buy
a remedy. They will not wait several days to have the remedy
delivered by mail.
On the other hand, the desire for food and soap is universal
and continuous. All your readers know that they will be able to
use a sample of these items regardless of whether the sample
arrives in three days or in three weeks.
For another example of such a test—this one in Singapore—
see Figure 18.3.

HOW TO GET MORE REPLIES FROM HIDDEN

OFFERS
If your booklet or sample offer does not pull sufficient inquiries,
you can sweeten the offer by including the promise of a free gift.
In testing lamp bulb ads, it was found that a hidden offer of a
booklet did not pull a sufficient number of requests. Therefore the
offer was made more attractive by including a free gift. This
method worked well. Here is the offer:
A handsome, double-action automatic pencil and extra
leads... and an interesting booklet about light and
seeing ... will be sent to you free if you tear out this ad
and send it to us with your name and address.
In another case, an airline wanted to test a series of 100-line,
alltype ads for airplane trips to Bermuda. The ads were tested in
a single newspaper of 600,000 circulation. The advertiser found
that a hidden offer of a booklet pulled fewer than 50 replies per
ad. This was not considered sufficient.
I

Figure 18.3:
Creating a
database that's
more than skin
deep. No reliable
database existed
for testing the
promotion of skin
care creams to
Singapore's
teenaged girls.
The campaign,
featuring a
contest and prize
drawings, ran in
lively teen-media
print ads and
point-of-sale
flyers. The 5,000-
name goal was
doubled,
permitting more
than expected
test groupings
and faster than

expected results.
The campaign was
a double winner. It
I

determined the
best approaches
for product sales,
and also how to
keep a valuable
database current
and continually
productive.
Winner, 1995
ECHO Award.
Seventeen Ways to Test Your Advertising 1

The advertiser sweetened the offer by including an offer of

a free pair of sunglasses and a free map of Bermuda in addition
to the free booklet. The offer was described as a "Free Bermuda
Vacation Kit." This offer brought more than enough replies for a
copy test—more than 400 replies per ad.
The "free kit" idea was also used successfully in copy tests
for other limited-appeal propositions. For example, a "Free
Painter's Kit" brought plenty of replies in testing house paint
ads. A "Homeowner's Kit" had good pulling power in testing ads
for building materials.

HOW TO DESCRIBE A BOOKLET ATTRACTIVELY

In testing ads for an investment service, it was found that the
line "Send for a free booklet" did not pull sufficient replies. By
including the following attractive description of the booklet, the
number of requests was increased more than 500 percent:
Where can I find out about investments that pay dividends?
What do they pay? Where can I get facts?
An 18-page booklet has been prepared to answer such questions.
This free booklet gives you facts in simple language.
It tells you what you own when you own stock. It tells you what
dividends are . . . and how often you may expect to receive
them.
Did you know there is a way to reduce investment risks? That's
in this booklet, too. Plus a list of companies whose stocks have
paid a cash dividend every year for 20 to 103 years. The booklet
includes some stocks that sell for less than $20 a share.
If you are interested in extra income, send for this booklet—
whether you have $200 or $5,000 to invest. Write for your free
copy today. Booklet will be sent by mail. No obligation.

OTHER WAYS TO INCREASE REPLIES

Use a Sunday newspaper: If you are testing ads in a daily
paper and you do not get enough replies, you can switch to a
Sunday paper. Sunday papers pull better because almost all
have larger circulation than their dailies and people have more
time to answer ads on Sunday.
2 CHAPTER 12

How to Make Store Coupons Effective

Use more circulation: If you are testing your ads in a paper

with
250,0 circulation, you can switch to a comparable paper with
500,000 circulation. This should double the number of your
replies.
Use additional newspapers: If you are testing your ads in a
single newspaper, you can add additional newspapers to bring
the number of replies up to a sufficient quantity.
Use bigger ads: If you are testing ads of 100-line size, you
can increase the size of your ads to 200 lines or to 500 lines.
Bigger ads bring more replies.
Of course, in any ad, you can increase replies by featuring
the offer in a headline or in a subhead. However, that method is
not recommended because the featuring of the offer tends to
invalidate a copy test by focusing attention on the offer instead
of on the sales appeal you are testing.
Summary: Following are briefly stated recommended
methods for increasing hard-to-get replies in a hidden-offer
copy test:
1. Offer the sample or booklet free instead of charging.
2. Set a value on the offer, such as "regular $l-size."
3. Sweeten the offer by adding a free gift.
4. Describe the offer attractively by listing its good features.
5. Run your test ads in a Sunday newspaper instead of in a
daily.
6. Run your test ads in a publication with larger circulation.
7. Run your test ads in additional publications.
8. Increase the size of your test ads.
8. A CONTINUING SALES TEST BY MAIL

Some advertisers make a continuing, year-round sales test of

their advertising by including a mail order offer in every ad and
in every publication. A key number is included in each ad so
that the advertiser can trace the source of every mail order
that comes in.
As a rule, the mail orders received by this method do not
pay the cost of the space, but they do give the advertiser a
chance to make comparisons. For example:
1. You can compare the pulling power of one ad versus another.
Seventeen Ways to Test Your Advertising 3

2. You can compare the pulling power of one publication versus

another.
3. You can keep records that will tell you in which months of
the year your ads pull best.
4. You can find out in which positions in publications your ads
do best.
Here is the last paragraph of a Wall Street Journal ad using
this method. Note the key number at the end of the ad. This
particular key number (NYT 1-10) stands for New York Times,
January 10.
The Wall Street Journal is the complete business DAILY. Has
largest staff of writers on business and finance. The only
business paper served by all three big press associations. It
costs [amount] a year, but you can get a Trial Subscription for
three months for [amount], lust tear out this ad and attach check
for [amount] and mail. Or tell us to bill you. Address: The Wall
Street Journal, 200 Burnett Road, Chicopee, Mass. 01021 NYT 1-
10.

9. TESTING ADS BY TELEPHONE RESPONSE

The following story illustrates how to handle this type of test:
"I talked with our chief engineer, and he says the best feature of
our new air conditioner is that it gets rid of humidity/' said the
sales manager of an appliance company. "If the air in a room is
kept dry, the human body cools itself."
"I see," said the ad manager.
"Maybe we should talk about getting rid of humidity in our ads. I
remember an old saying—It isn't the heat, it's the humidity."
"That doesn't sound like a very exciting ad campaign."
"Well, I must admit that our sales reps do not use the humidity
appeal very much. They talk about cooling the air. They tell cus-
tomers how to keep a room cool in hot weather. I wonder which
appeal we should use in our ads, coolness or humidity?"
"We can try both appeals. We can run an ad on humidity and put
in a telephone number and ask people to telephone for
information.
We can keep track of how many telephone calls we get. Then we
can run an ad on coolness and keep a record of how many
telephone calls that ad brings."
"Where will you run the ads?"
"In a daily newspaper."
"The ad that runs on the hottest day will be the winner. You
know how people crowd into our showrooms on hot days." "All
4 CHAPTER 18

right, we'll run each ad several times. We'll alternate the ads—
first an ad on coolness, then an ad on humidity. Then coolness,
then humidity. That will average out the weather factor."
"Good idea. Now, how about having the phone calls switched to
our showroom? Then, when somebody telephones we can have
the call handled by one of our sales reps. We can make some
sales and test the ads at the same time."
"Fine," said the ad manager.

RESULTS OF THIS TEST

Two ads were prepared. The ads were set in type in editorial
style with no pictures. Each ad measured two columns by 100
lines. In the last paragraph of each ad was a telephone number
and a sentence urging the reader to telephone for further
information.
Here are the headlines of the two ads. See if you can guess
which ad brought the most telephone calls.
No. 1. Get rid of that humidity with a new room cooler that also
dries the air.
No. 2. How to have a cool, quiet bedroom—even on hot nights.

These ads were run alternately, about once a week, in a

newspaper with half a million circulation. A record was kept of
the number of telephone calls produced by each ad.
It was not long before the pattern of results became
apparent. The second headline, "How to have a cool, quiet
bedroom—even on hot nights," averaged two and a half times as
many calls as the first one, "Get rid of that humidity."
As a result of this test, the humidity appeal was dropped
from the ad headlines and the coolness appeal was featured in
all ads during the rest of the summer. Sales results were
excellent.

OTHER EXAMPLES
A finance company wanted to test "hard-sell" ads versus "soft-
sell" ads. Here are examples of the two different campaigns:
Seventeen Ways to Test Your Advertising 5

These ads were tested in newspapers. One ad contained a

panel of copy that said: "For quick information on loans, simply
telephone [telephone number] and ask for Miss Miller." All
telephone calls to Miss Miller were credited to that ad. The
other ad contained an identical panel of copy except that the
line "Ask for Miss Miller" was changed to read "Ask for Miss
Johnson." All telephone calls to Miss Johnson were credited to
the ad containing the name Miss Johnson.
In this test, the ad with the headline, "How you can get a
loan of $200" brought two and a half times as many telephone
calls as the other
ad.
In commenting on the results of this test, the account
executive said: "The headline 'When can a loan help you?' is a
philosophical headline. When people are in trouble, they don't
want philosophy—they want money! And so they respond better
to the ad, 'Flow you can get a loan of $200.'"
Here are some other situations in which ads were tested by
including an urge to telephone for information and by keeping
records of which ads produced the most telephone calls.
An engineering concern ran help-wanted ads in the
classified section of newspapers and included a telephone
number in the copy. Each ad urged the job applicant to
telephone for information and told the name of a certain
individual to ask for. For example: Ask for Mr. Digby, Ask for Mr.
Thompson, and so on. This method was used to test the
6 CHAPTER 18

pulling power of different copy approaches and also to test

the pulling power of different newspapers.
A private school used the same method to test which ads
were most effective in getting phone calls from prospective
students. The school also used this method to determine which
day of the week was best. Result: Sunday was found to be
better than weekdays.
An office products manufacturer used this method, not only
to test copy, but as a productive source of leads for sales
representatives to call on.

10. TESTING ADVERTISING APPEALS BY MAIL

"How can we keep our competitors from learning about our new
campaign if we run a copy test in newspapers?" said the
advertising manager of a soap company.
"We can avoid testing in big cities. We can run our test ads
in a small city like Peoria," said the account executive.
"I'm afraid of that. This new X-appeal has never been used
to sell soap. I don't want it to leak out in advance of our
national campaign. You know, our business is very competitive.
If we run X-appeal ads in Peoria, our competitors will know
about it in a few days."
"We can skip the copy test," said the account executive.
"No, I want to get a comparison of the pulling power of the
X- appeal ads versus our current Y-appeal ads. I want some
evidence to show to our management."
"We can do an opinion test among housewives. We can
have interviewers show X-layouts and Y-layouts and ask women
to vote for their preference."
"No, a lot of women might be embarrassed to vote for the
X-appeal ads. The ads are a bit shocking. But I think they have
sales appeal."
"We could do a copy test by mail."
"How would that work?"
"We would buy a list of names and addresses of typical
housewives from a mail-order-list broker," said the account
executive. "We could buy a good-sized list—10,000 names. We
could get up mailing pieces based on our ads. Or we might mail
actual proofs of ads. We could include an offer in the ads—and a
reply card. We would mail X- appeal ads to half of the women on
the list and Y-appeal ads to the other half. The reply cards
would be keyed—Dept. X and Dept. Y—so that we could tell
which appeal pulled best."
 Seventeen Ways to Test Your Advertising 7

"What should we offer?"

"A sample of the soap."
"Free or for money?"
"Either way. If we charge 50c! for the sample we would
have to enclose return envelopes instead of postcards. And we
would have to mail a larger number of letters in order to get
sufficient replies. On the other hand, if the sample is offered
free, we could use a smaller mailing and enclose postcards for
reply."
"Should the postcards have the offer printed on them?"
"No, because some women might read the offer before
reading the ad. They might even send for the offer without
reading the ad. That would upset our test. The postcards should
merely have blank spaces for the housewife to write in her name
and address. Then the copy test would operate in proper
sequence. There would be a hidden offer in the copy in the ads.
Only those women who were sufficiently interested in the ads
would read the copy and discover the hidden offer."
"How much would a copy test like that cost?"
"About five thousand dollars."
"How long would it take?"
"About two weeks."

TYPICAL EXAMPLES
The preceding incident illustrates a method of copy testing that
has been used from time to time over the years.
One example is the case of a cigar manufacturer who
wanted to test six different appeals. Six headlines were written,
and each headline featured a different appeal. To save on
mailing costs, double postcards were used instead of letters.
Headlines and appropriate copy messages (containing a hidden
offer) were printed on one side of the card, and the attached
business reply card contained the manufacturer's name and
address and space for the recipient's name and address. Here is
the hidden offer:
Sign your name on the attached postcard, mail it now, and we
will send you three cigars with our compliments. We want you to
know how good they are. And if you want more later—and we
feel sure you will—your nearest cigar store has them.
One of the cards containing a new appeal in the headline
pulled nearly 50 percent more replies than any of the other
8 CHAPTER 18

cards. This appeal was used subsequently as the basic theme of

a successful ad campaign.
A package-goods manufacturer also used mailings to test
the pulling power of several different appeals. Five appeals
were tested. Each appeal was featured in the headline on 2,000
postcards making a total mailing of 10,000 postcards to
housewives. Under each headline appeared three paragraphs of
copy about the product. This was followed by a final paragraph
containing the hidden offer, as follows:
To get your free package, simply sign the attached card with your name
and address and drop it in the mail. No stamp is needed.
There is no obligation, of course. But don't delay. Put the
attached card in the mail now.
Food manufacturers, drug manufacturers, and
correspondence- school advertisers have also used this method
of pretesting basic appeals or proofs of ads before running the
ads in publications. The offers used have been samples of the
product or booklets about the product or service.
11. OPINION TESTS BY MAIL
If your copy-testing problem is one that can be helped by an
opinion test, you can, if you wish, do your opinion test by mail
instead of by personal interview. For example, you can send out
two thousand letters printed on a special letterhead with a
heading such as the words "Research Bureau." Here is a typical
letter:
RESEARCH BUREAU
Room 1891

590 Lexington Ave., New York, N.Y.

10017 Dear Friend:

The other day I made a statement that I was immediately
challenged to prove.
I said that it wasn't necessary to go and see people in order to
ask them questions. I claimed that if you wrote to them in the
right sort of way, they would be glad to answer.
Will you help me prove that I am right? All you need do is
compare the six roughly sketched advertisements attached to
this letter and decide which one of them would be most likely to
interest you.
Then enter your choice at the bottom of this sheet, using the
initial that appears under the ad. After you have chosen number
one, decide which ad is second, which third, and so on until you
 Seventeen Ways to Test Your Advertising 9

have entered all six in the spaces provided.

Do not return the ads themselves. lust enclose this letter containing your
vote in the attached stamped and addressed envelope.
Gratefully yours,
lane Thompson
My first choice is advt_____ My fourth choice is advt___________
My second choice is advt_____ My fifth choice is advt_________
My third choice is advt_____ My sixth choice is advt__________
Please indicate whether you are male____or female______

12. TESTING BUS CARDS

A cosmetic manufacturer prepared two different bus cards
featuring two different sales appeals. Let us designate these as
Card A and Card B.
Card A featured the social popularity the user of the
product would gain by using the cosmetic. At the bottom of the
card was printed a line in small type that said, "For a trial
bottle, send 50<£ to Dept. A." Below this line was printed the
address of the manufacturer.
Card B featured a specific skin ailment the cosmetic would
help to relieve. At the bottom of the card was printed the offer
of a trial bottle for 50tf. The only difference was that the reader
was instructed to write to Dept. B instead of to Dept. A.
As you may know, in buying showings of bus cards or
subway cards, it is possible to buy small showings or large
showings, as follows:
1. If you buy a half-showing, your bus card will be placed in
every other bus on a certain bus line. In other words your
card will appear in half the buses (or in half the subway
cars, in the case of subway advertising).
2. If you buy a full showing, your card will appear in every bus
or in every subway car.
The cosmetic advertiser bought two half-showings on a
certain bus line. In one of the half-showings she placed Card A.
In the other halfshowing she placed Card B. In this way, each
card received identical exposure under identical conditions.
The test was continued for two months, and during that period
this advertiser received 65 percent more replies from one card
than from the other card. Incidentally, the results of this test
agreed with a mail-order test in newspapers in which this
manufacturer tested the same two appeals.
10 CHAPTER 18

13. SALES TESTING IN SELECTED CITIES

A question sometimes asked by students of advertising in
regard to testing ads is: "Why don't you just run the ad or ads
you wish to test in newspapers in a single city and measure the
sales results?" The answer is that this method sounds simple,
but in actual practice may be expensive, time-consuming, and
subject to errors. For example:
1. If you are selling an old and established product, the sales
of your product will continue to a certain extent with or
without additional advertising.
2. If you sell through wholesalers, it may be a long time
before any extra sales (resulting from your newspaper ads)
will be reflected in your factory shipments to wholesalers.
Current users won't buy your household cleanser, for
example, until their present supply is used up. Comer
grocers or supermarket managers won't reorder until their
stock runs low. The wholesaler won't send an order to your
factory until inventory is nearly exhausted. Hence, an ad
campaign in Peoria might be successful in making those
who read your ad want your product, but you would not
know about it until months later.
3. It is difficult to measure one advertising appeal against
another by this method because both appeals will probably
sell some merchandise. You have to find two equally
matched cities so that you can advertise one appeal in one
city and another appeal in another city and compare the
difference in sales results. No matter how carefully you try
to match two cities, you may find that your test is adversely
affected by conditions you cannot control, or even by
hidden conditions you are unaware of at the time.
In spite of the difficulties of sales testing in selected cities,
this method has been used for many years in what have proved
to be reliable test markets and will continue to be used because
the results are measured in actual sales.
If you wish to test two different advertising appeals in
selected cities, here are some precautions that may help to give
you an accurate measurement.
1. Don't just test one ad (Ad A) versus another ad (Ad B). the
difference in sales results would probably be too small to
measure. You should prepare two campaigns, namely
Campaign A and Campaign B. Run Campaign A for a long
time (two to six months) in one city or in a selected group
 Seventeen Ways to Test Your Advertising 11

of cities. Run Campaign B for the same length of time in a

different city or in a selected group of cities.
2. Instead of running small ads once in awhile, you can speed
up results by running big ads frequently. In other words,
during the test period you can overadvertise in order to
accentuate the difference in the selling power of Campaign
A versus Campaign B.
3. You should try to find a quicker and more sensitive
measure of sales results than your factory shipments to
wholesalers. For example, you can send out survey
reporters at regular intervals to visit certain typical stores.
By arrangement with store owners, these survey reporters
should count the packages of your product on shelves and
keep running inventories that will reflect sales results
quickly and accurately.

SALES TESTING A NEW PRODUCT

If you are launching a new product, you may find that sales
testing is more practical than it would be in a case in which you
are trying to increase the sales of an established product. For
example, one man who invented a new patent medicine started
sales testing in his hometown by running a new and different ad
each week in the daily newspaper. The ad directed prospects to
buy at the local drugstore.
Each week this man personally visited the drugstores in his
town and counted the packages of his product on the shelves.
During some weeks he found that he made no sales, and during
other weeks he made a few sales.
Then one day he ran a newspaper ad based on an entirely
different sales appeal. As a result, he discovered that during
that particular week the supply of his product was entirely sold
out.
This discovery, in a single city, of an effective sales appeal
was the beginning of a patent-medicine advertising campaign
that later became well-known throughout the United States.
14. COOPERATIVE SALES TEST
In trying to discover a method for sales testing some ads, a
manufacturer said to himself, "If I owned a department store, I
could easily test the selling power of various different ads for
my product. I would simply run the ads, one each week, in a
12 CHAPTER 18

daily newspaper in my city and keep a record of the sales

resulting from each ad.
"Of course, there might be a few inaccuracies in this
method. For example, one ad might run in a better position than
another ad. And there might be some cumulative sales effect of
a whole series of ads. Nevertheless, if one of my ads made an
outstanding sales record, I would know it. And I could double-
check the results by repeating that same outstanding ad at a
later date."
While thinking about this problem, the manufacturer had
this idea: "Perhaps I don't need to own a department store in
order to use this method. Maybe I can induce a department
store manager to cooperate with me in testing the selling power
of some ads. I will tell him that I will pay the cost of running
some ads in the daily newspaper if he will do me the favor of
reporting to me the sales results from each ad. The ads will
feature my merchandise and will be signed with the name of his
store."
He tried this method and found it to be successful.
Department store managers were approached on the basis of
"I'll do a favor for you (pay for some ads urging people to go to
your store) if you will do a favor for me (tell me the sales
results)."
The same method has been used with chain drugstores in
large cities in order to test the selling power of various ads for
drugstore items. Ads were run in newspapers once a week.
Each week's ad features a different selling appeal in the
headline. And each ad was signed with the name of a certain
drugstore chain. This caused the sales results to be
concentrated in stores owned by that particular drug chain.
This concentration of sales in a few stores owned by the same
chain made the sales results easier to measure than if the sales
results were scattered through dozens of independent stores.
Note that this method of "cooperative" advertising is
regulated by federal law. Before starting any "co-op" plan, get
clearance from a legal expert in this field.1

15. READERSHIP TESTS BY INTERVIEW

Suppose you ran an ad in the daily newspaper in your city and
you wanted to find out how many people saw your ad. Suppose
that the day after your ad appeared you decided to call on your

1 For an expanded discussion of "Co-op" advertising, see Do-It-Yourself Advertising and Promotion,
Second Edition by Fred Hahn and Kenneth Mangun.
 Seventeen Ways to Test Your Advertising 13

friends and neighbors and ask them if they saw your ad.
Let us say that you had to call on ten neighbors before you
found one who had noticed your ad. You would then say to
yourself "One out of ten is 10 percent. The newspaper in which
my ad appeared has 20,000 circulation. Therefore, my ad was
noticed by 10 percent of 20,000 people, or a total of 2,000
people."
This method is the readership method of testing the
effectiveness of advertising. The preceding example is, of
course, an oversimplification of the method. In actual practice,
you have to improve the efficiency of a readership test by using
refinements such as the following:
1. Don't call on friends. They are likely to try to please you by
saying that they noticed your ad even though they did not
actually notice it.
2. In interviewing people, don't point to a particular ad. It is
better to turn the pages of the newspaper and say, "Did you
notice anything on page 2? Did you notice anything on
page 3? As I turn the pages of the newspaper, please point
out anything you may have noticed." You can go through
the entire newspaper in this way or you can save time by
confining your interview to a few pages. In any event, you
will get an idea of how your ad compares in attention value
with other ads in the newspaper.
3. If you wish, you can ask additional questions. If a person
says he or she saw a certain ad, you can then say, "Did you
read any of it?" If the person says yes, you can ask further
questions such as, "What part of the ad did you read? Did
you buy the product advertised? Do you intend to buy the
product? Did the ad make you want to buy the product?"
4. To increase the reliability of a readership test, it will be
necessary for you to interview many more than ten people.
It will be necessary to interview hundreds of people and
this will require the hiring of a staff of survey reporters—
men or women who will go from house to house and ask
the questions you want asked.
In actual practice, the readership method of ad testing is
usually done by hiring the services of a professional
organization specializing in this work. These specialized
companies make readership tests of ads in both magazines and
14 CHAPTER 18

newspapers—as well as for radio and television— and prepare

detailed reports showing the percent of readers who said they
saw or read various advertisements. You can buy these
readership reports and have them mailed to you at regular
intervals. This type of service is usually too expensive for an
individual to buy. It is usually bought by advertising agencies or
by large companies that invest millions of dollars in advertising.
The readership method of measuring the effectiveness of
advertising has advantages and disadvantages. For example,
one advantage is that you can get reports on the readership of
all the ads in a publication including your competitors'
advertising. A disadvantage is that an ad that gets a high rating
by this method may not necessarily produce many sales. It may
be an attention-getting ad without being a selling ad.
16. READERSHIP TESTS BY MAIL
Sometimes readership tests are done by mail instead of by
personal interview. For example, here is an extract from a letter
that was sent out by the publisher of a magazine:
Your regular copy, Mr. [Name] of our luly issue was mailed to you
several weeks ago. You have undoubtedly had an opportunity to read
it by this time.

We will be sincerely grateful if you will cooperate with us in a study

we are making among a few selected readers.

What we would like to know particularly is which advertisements

interested you when you went through this issue. We are also
interested in your reading of editorial material. An extra copy of the
luly issue is enclosed. You will also find enclosed a special editor's
pencil and a postage-paid return envelope.

Will you kindly draw a line down the middle of each ad and each
editorial item that interested you?

If you have not seen this issue at all, please mark a large X on the
front cover and return it anyway. The editor's pencil is yours to keep
as a souvenir.

We will also welcome any comments you wish to make on specific

editorial items or advertisements.

Thank you very much for cooperating with us in this study Your help
will be of great value to us and to our advertisers.

17. SPLIT-RUN COPY TESTING IN PUBLICATIONS

"Here are two mail order ads I'd like to test," said an
advertising manager to his assistant. "I'd like to find out which
 Seventeen Ways to Test Your Advertising 15

ad is the better puller." "Where shall we test them?" asked the

assistant. "In a magazine?"
"No, let's test them in a daily newspaper. That way we can
get a quick test. Magazines have longer closing dates."
"Which ad shall we run first?"
"That's a problem. I'm afraid that the ad we run first may
have an unfair advantage. The first ad may grab the easy-to-get
customers. The second ad will be left with slim pickings. The
first ad may look like the winner on sales. But the second ad,
although it gets fewer sales, may be the better of the two ads."
"I could argue the other way," said the assistant. "I've
always heard that the effect of advertising is cumulative.
Therefore, the first ad that appears will warm up the customers,
but the second ad will get the most sales."
"Hmm," said the ad manager. "I wish this advertising
business weren't so complicated! Isn't it almost time to go to
lunch?"

VARIABLES IN COPY TESTING

The preceding story illustrates one of the variables that may
affect a copy test, namely, the order of appearance of the ads.
Some advertisers try to compensate for this variable by testing
ads in two newspapers and by reversing the order of
appearance of the ads in the second newspaper. In the first
newspaper, for example, Ad A runs on Monday and Ad B on
Tuesday. In the second newspaper, Ad B runs on Monday and
Ad A runs on Tuesday. Returns from the two sets of ads are
averaged.
The position of an ad in a newspaper is another variable
that affects copy testing. One ad may get top-of-page position
on the women's page while another ad gets bottom-of-page
position on a general news page. To avoid this variable, you can
ask newspaper makeup people to cooperate by placing test ads
in similar positions. For example, you can include in your
insertion orders this instruction: "Both of these ads are to
appear in the upper right-hand comer of the women's page."
The weather can affect a copy test, too. One ad may have
the advantage of appearing on a rainy day when a lot of people
stay home and have more time to answer ads. This variable can
be compensated for by running your test ads in several widely
separated cities.
16 CHAPTER 18

HOW SPLIT-RUN COPY TESTING WORKS

The advent of split-run copy testing put an end to these
troublesome variables. By means of split-run testing, it became
possible to test two different advertisements on the same day
and in the same position by running each ad in one-half of the
circulation of a newspaper. An explanation of how this is
possible follows.
The presses that print certain newspapers print from
cylinders on which each page of the newspaper is placed twice
on each cylinder. Hence, a complete revolution of the cylinder
prints two copies of a sin- gle page.
When advertisers want to use split-run testing in the
newspaper, they provide the paper with two advertisements of
the same size. One advertisement (A) is placed on one side of
the cylinder, the next advertisement (B) is placed on the other
side. Thus, a complete revolution of this cylinder prints two
copies of the same page, a different advertisement occupying
the same space on each page.
All newsdealers, no matter where they are located, receive
a supply of newspapers in which Advertisement A and
Advertisement B are equally divided among consecutive copies.
Thus, in every locality and neighborhood into which the
newspaper goes, whether delivered to homes or sold by news
dealers, exactly the same number of papers containing
Advertisement A and Advertisement B reach the newspaper
readers. This kind of test is known and ordered as an "A/B Split
Run."
The importance of this in testing is immediately apparent.
Every variable that might affect the result of the test is
removed. Each advertisement is tested under conditions exactly
alike. Both advertisements reach readers simultaneously in the
same geographical areas and under the same weather
conditions. Both advertisements occupy the same position in
the newspaper and are surrounded by the same editorial
matter. Absolutely the only variable to which the
advertisements are subjected is the one the advertisers
themselves puts in for the purpose of testing one against the
other.

VARIOUS USES OF SPLIT-RUN TESTING

Split-run copy testing in newspapers is one of the greatest
 Seventeen Ways to Test Your Advertising 17

inventions ever devised for the benefit of scientific-method

advertisers. Here are three reasons why:
1. The method is quick. You can test two ads on a Monday, for
example, and in most cases you will know as early as
Tuesday or Wednesday which is the winner.
2. The method is accurate. No longer do you need to say, as a
result of a test, "Ad A is about twice as good as Ad B" (or
about half again as good as Ad B, whichever the case may
be). You can now say, for example, that "Ad A is 43 percent
better than Ad B."
3. You can test fine points. This method is so accurate that
you can test small differences between ads. For example,
the following small differences between ads were tested.

Test No. 1. Two drug-product ads were tested that were

identical except that in Ad A the headline was printed above the
picture and in Ad B the headline was printed below the picture.
Ad B pulled 8 percent more replies. David Ogilvy in Ogilvy on
Advertising, emphasizes the importance of this point by asking
why anyone would give up 20,000 potential readers in a
250,000 circulation publication just to place a headline over the
picture.
Test No. 2. Two beauty-product ads using pictures of the
same girl model were tested. The ads were identical except that
in Ad A the girl was smiling and in Ad B the girl had a serious
expression. Ad A pulled 25 percent more replies.
Test No. 3. Two all-type automotive ads were tested. The
copy was identical in both ads except for a change in headline
wording as follows:
Headl ine of Ad A: Save one gallon of gas in every ten
Headl ine of Ad B: Car Owners! Save one gallon of gas in every ten
Ad B pulled 20 percent more replies.
Test No. 4. Two financial ads were tested that were
identical except that Ad A contained the subhead "Send for
Free Booklet" above the coupon and Ad B omitted the subhead.
The ad with the subhead above the coupon pulled 5 percent
more replies than the other ad.
Split-run copy testing can be used for mail-order tests,
coupon tests, hidden-offer tests, readership tests, layout tests,
illustration tests, and store-sales tests. Advertisers have only
scratched the surface of the possibilities of split-run testing.
18 CHAPTER 18

Just think, in a single day in a typical large city, you can put a
certain ad (Ad A) into the hands of 250,000 people and you can
put a different ad (Ad B) into the hands of another
250,0 people under identical conditions. This is accurate
sampling on a massive scale and at low cost. To do large-scale
sampling of this kind by other research methods would present
enormous difficulties and cost staggering sums of money.
There are more than 1,000 split-run newspapers in the
United States, listed by SRDS, (formerly the Standard Rate and
Data Service). You can do split-run copy testing in any of these
papers. You encounter no more difficulty than the scheduling of
ads, the answering of replies, and the tabulating of results. And
the cost is merely the cost of the newspaper ads plus a small
mechanical fee charged by newspapers for split- run testing.
Many magazines also offer split-run testing. TV Guide has
more than 80 editions in which copy can be split-run tested.
Due to long closing dates (a month or two in advance of
publication date), you cannot get a quick split-run test in
magazines, but you can make copy testing a regular part of
your advertising campaign.

HOW TO TEST A WHOLE SERIES OF ADS BY SPLIT-

RUN
An advertising manager was talking to an agency media
specialist about split-run copy testing. "I can see how you are
able to test two ads by split-run. You just run each ad in half the
circulation of a newspaper on the same day and count the
replies/' said the advertising manager. "But can you test more
than two ads—for example four ads or ten ads?"
"Yes, you can test four ads by doing three split-run tests a
week apart," said the media expert. "For example, let's say that
during the first week you do a split-run test in a daily
newspaper and Ad A gets 100 replies and Ad B gets 150 replies.
The next week you can test two more ads, for example, Ad C
versus Ad D. Let's say that Ad C is the winner. Now you have
two winners—Ad B is the winner of the first test and Ad C is the
winner of the second test. During the following week you can
split-run test the two winners against each other and find out
which ad is the best of the entire series of four ads."
"How would you test ten ads?" said the ad manager.
"You can divide the ten ads into groups—four ads plus four
 Seventeen Ways to Test Your Advertising 19

ads plus two ads—and test the groups separately. Then you can
test the winners of the groups against each other. It's the same
plan as they use in intercollegiate track meets where a lot of
athletes are competing. First you have preliminary contests to
weed out the obviously hopeless contestants. Then you have the
semifinals and then the finals.
"A slightly different plan can be used if desired. Suppose
you have ten ads, numbered from one to ten. Let's say that on a
certain Monday you split-run test Ad Number One versus Ad
Number Two. You count the replies and by Thursday you find
that Ad Number One is the winner. Now, thanks to short
newspaper closing dates, you have time to schedule your winner
Ad Number One versus Ad Number Three on the following
Monday. Again you count replies and you find out which ad is
the winner of this second split-run test. You then schedule the
winner on the second test against a new, untested ad on the
third Monday. You can continue this process every Monday until
all of your ads have been tested and you emerge with an overall
winner."
"It takes a lot of time, doesn't it?" said the ad manager.
"Well, it takes ten weeks to test ten ads. And the process
can go on indefinitely. This plan has the advantage that it gives
the copywriters time to study the results as the test progresses.
If they learn that a certain appeal is doing well, they can create
and test new ads that accentuate that appeal. In other words, as
the test progresses, the writers are given a sense of direction in
which to travel."

A QUICK WAY TO TEST ADS BY SPLIT-RUN

"Is there any faster way to test a series of, say, ten ads?"
"Yes, there is a plan that lets you test ten ads in ten days
instead of ten weeks."
"How does it work?"
"You select one of your ads and use it as a Control Ad or
measuring stick. Every day you run your Control Ad in half the
circulation of a split-run newspaper, and every day you run one
of the ads you want to test in the other half of the circulation.
For example, your schedule might start off like this:
Monday: Ad Number One versus Control Ad
Tuesday: Ad Number Two versus Control Ad
Wednesday: Ad Number Three versus Control Ad
20 CHAPTER 18

"You can continue this process until you have split-run

tested all ten ads against the same Control Ad."
"How do you tabulate the results in order to select the
winning
ad?"
"Well, as a rule, some ads pull more replies than the
Control Ad and some pull fewer replies than the Control Ad.
The winning ad is the one that exceeds the Control Ad by the
greatest percentage. Your tabulation of results might look like
this:
Ad Number One is 20 percent better than the Control Ad
Ad Number Two is 35 percent poorer than the Control Ad
Ad Number Three is 60 percent better than the Control Ad
And so on.
"Obviously, Ad Number Three is the best up to this point
and Ad Number One is the second best. After all ten ads in the
series have been tested against the Control Ad, you can rank
the entire series in order of merit, from one to ten. In some
tests it has been found that the best-pulling ad will outrank the
Control Ad by several hundred percent."
"Doesn't a test of this kind tend to wear down the pulling
power of the ads as the test progresses?"
"Sometimes it does. Sometimes the tenth pair of ads in a
series will pull only half the total of the first pair. You can help
to avoid this wearing down of pulling power by using small-
sized test ads, for example, 100 lines each. Small-sized ads do
not wear out their pulling power as fast."
"Does this wearing down of pulling power upset the test?"
"No, it doesn't. Many times we have repeated, at the end of
a series of test ads, the same pair of test ads that we ran at the
beginning, in order to double-check the results. The percentage
of difference between the two repeated ads has been
approximately the same as at the beginning of the test. In other
words, you get the same percentage results no matter at what
point in the series a certain pair of ads appears."

HOW THIRTY-SIX HEADLINES WERE TESTED

"What is the largest number of ads you have tested in a short
time by this method?" said the ad manager.
"In one instance we tested 36 ads in two weeks. We wrote
a piece of patent medicine copy containing two elements: (1) a
 Seventeen Ways to Test Your Advertising 21

complete sales talk for the medicine, and (2) a hidden offer of a
sample bottle of the medicine for $1," said the media specialist.
"Then the copy department wrote 36 different headlines for
this single piece of copy. We wanted to know which headline
would induce the most people to read the ad. The copy was set
in type—no pictures— in single-column size and 75 lines deep.
We then set the 36 headlines in type, one for each headline.
This gave us our total of 36 ads to test.
"Four newspapers that offer split-run testing were selected.
Let us call them Newspapers A, B, C, and D.
"We picked a single Control Ad (any ad in the series can be
used as a control) and scheduled this Control Ad to run in half
the circulation of Newspaper A on ten different days—Monday
through Friday, for two weeks. Each day, in the other half of the
circulation of Newspaper A, we ran one of the 36 ads we wanted
to test. In this way we tested ten ads in two weeks. Likewise,
during the same two weeks, we tested ten different ads in
Newspaper B using the same Control Ad as a measuring stick.
In Newspaper C, we tested ten more ads using the Same
Control Ad, and in Newspaper D we tested in the same way the
remaining six ads in our total of 36 ads.
"The net result was that in a period of two weeks we tested
36 different headlines against the same Control Ad and then
ranked the entire list in order of pulling power. One of the
headlines exceeded the Control Ad by 300 percent and another
by 200 percent. The selling appeals contained in these two
winning headlines were used as the basis of a successful
national campaign."

GENERAL COMMENTS ON TESTING

As previously stated, advertising is not an exact science like
chemistry. If you tell chemists that you are going to mix certain
chemicals in certain proportions, they can predict the result
accurately. However, if you tell advertising professionals that
you are going to run a certain advertisement in a certain
publication, they cannot tell you exactly what results you will
get. They can give you only an approximate opinion based on
their own past experience.
Of all branches of advertising, mail-order advertising
comes the nearest to being a science. Given a tested piece of
copy and a tested publication, an experienced mail order pro
22 CHAPTER 18

can often predict results surprisingly well. It is for this reason

that a study of mail order methods is valuable to the general
advertiser.
Compare for a moment the present-day situation in
advertising with the manufacturing situation. Would a
manufacturer of electronic products install a new type of
insulation without first subjecting it to all sorts of tests?
Certainly not. Would an automobile manufacturer buy a
trainload of new axles or enamel or fabric without pretesting?
The answer is no. Yet scores of manufacturers are buying
trainloads of advertising, and the only test to which the
advertising is submitted is their own personal opinion or the
opinion of a subordinate. Advertising will never produce the
results it can produce until some sort of testing is brought into
the picture.

FOUR IMPORTANT FACTORS IN EVERY ADVERTISING CAMPAIGN:

1. Copy—what you say in your advertisements. This includes

the appeal used and the method of expressing that appeal.
2. Media—which magazines, newspapers, broadcasting
facilities, or other media you select to carry your message
to the public.
3. Position—what position your advertisements occupy in
publications; which day of the week or what time of day
you select for your broadcast messages.
4. Season—in which months of the year you run most of your
advertising.

Any one of these factors can cause a wide difference in

results from advertising. As mentioned earlier, Caples once saw
one ad bring in 19-1/2 times as much business as another ad.
Yet both advertisements appeared under similar conditions and
both cost the manufacturer the same amount of money. This is
an extreme case. Let us be conservative and say that in an
average advertising campaign consisting of a dozen
advertisements, some of the advertisements will produce two or
three times as much business as others.
Certain publications will do the same, that is, produce
several times as much business as others. As for the position of
your ad in a publication, certain special positions often add 50
percent to 100 percent to inquiries and sales. And as for season,
it is not unusual for a mail-order advertiser to receive twice as
 Seventeen Ways to Test Your Advertising 23

many orders from a January advertisement as from an August

advertisement, both advertisements costing the manufacturer
the same.
Consider the tremendous effectiveness of an advertising
campaign that gets all these factors right—copy, media,
position, and season. The advertisers who get these factors
right are multiplying the effect of their advertising dollar. They
make one dollar do the work of ten dollars.
The advertisers who get these factors wrong—especially
copy and media—are throwing a large part of their advertising
appropriation away.
Regardless of what method of testing you use, the
important thing is to have some method of testing. Testing
enables you to throw opinions overboard and get down to facts.
Perhaps there is some particularly effective appeal in your sales
story. Perhaps you do not realize how effective this appeal
would be if featured in advertising. Testing will enable you to
find out. Perhaps you are spending money on some hopeless
appeal. Testing will point the way to the discarding of this
appeal.
Testing enables you to guard against an advertising
manager or copy chief whose pet ideas may be hurting your
advertising. Testing enables you to guard against an advertising
agency whose idea of agency service is merely to turn out pretty
layouts and stereotyped copy. Testing enables you to guard
against mistaken ideas that you yourself may have in regard to
advertising. And finally, testing enables you to keep in touch
with trends in advertising. What was good advertising a few
years ago may not always be good advertising today.
Trends change. Sometimes the attitude of the public
changes. When advertisers come out with a new idea they may
be able to cash in on it for a while. Then other advertisers copy
their methods. The idea is no longer new. It becomes common.
The public gets used to it and tires of it.
There is, however, one rule that never changes:
Test everything on a small scale before you spend money on a
large scale. Testing enables you to keep your finger on the
public pulse. It enables you to sense trends in advance. It
enables you to separate the wheat from the chaff, the sheep
from the goats, the winning ideas from the duds. It enables you
to multiply the results you get from the dollars you spend in
advertising.
24 CHAPTER 18

If I were starting life over again, I am inclined to think that I

would go into the advertising business. Advertising covers the
whole range of human needs. It brings to the greatest number
of people actual knowledge concerning useful things. It is
essentially a form of education. It has risen with ever-growing
rapidity to the dignity of an art.
Franklin D. Roosevelt
INDEX

Action B
in copy, 101 Believability, of headlines, 26
urging immediate action, 177-78 Bell Atlantic ad, 120-21 Blake,
urging reader to act, 158 Address, John W., 1-2 "Blind Advertising
printing in add, 176 Ad quiz, about Expenditures", (Blake), 1-2, 88-
successful/ 89 Booklets. See Inquiries from
unsuccessful ads, 224-34 ads, increasing Bus cards,
Advertising classes of, 1-2 topics in testing of, 255 Business-reply
study of, 1 Advertising awards, 28- coupon, use of, 178 Business-
29 Advertising campaign reply postcard, use of, 178
alternative to testing, 5 appeals in,
4-5 basic elements in, 267 testing
ads, 1-10 Affected copy, avoiding,
c
131 Alexander Hamilton Institute Canyon Ranch ad, 23
ad, 118 American Federation of Caples, John, ix-xix
Teachers ad, 125 Captions, for illustrations,
Anderson Consulting ad, 108 134 Card copy
Appeals, 4-5, 70-83 analysis cautions about, 128 elements of,
of, 74-78 creating ill will with, 128 testing bus cards, 255
78-82 duty / honor / Carnation ad, 56-57 Cellophane,
professionalism, dramatizing copy for, 161-62
70-71 Chemical Bank ad, 65 Chocolate
effective appeals, beverage, dramatizing copy for, 162
characteristics of, 73-74 Cities, test cities for ads, 8,
greed/money appeal, 70, 74 in 255-57 Classified ads, 221-23
headlines, 76 importance of, 74- promoting use of, 222-
76 relationship to buyer, 71, 73- 23 results from, 222
74 sex/sex appeal, 70 sounding Clever copy
good versus good idea, 79-80 cautions about, 129 elements of,
specific versus general appeals, 128-29 Competitive copy analysis
82-83 value of, 4 of, 181,183 elements of, 127
T7'l INDEX
Contractions, use/misuse in 156 types to avoid, 130-32
copy, 186-87 urging read to act, 158 "you and
Copywriters, and writing of ads, me" copy, 116-17 See also
84-86 Copywriting Headline writing Coupons, 166-
captions for illustrations, 134 68 advantages of, 168 business-
card copy, 128 clever copy, 128- reply coupons, 178 versus
29 competitive copy, 127 hidden offers, 11, 240
curiosity-arousing copy, 139-41 increasing inquiries to ad with,
dramatizing dull products. See 175 printing value on, 175
Dramatizing copy easy to read returns, importance of, 11
copy, 186-98 enthusiasm in, 96- selling copy on, 175 selling
101 facts in copy, 141-43 facts- devices in, 241 store coupons,
plus-style copy, 119 factual copy, examples of, 167 testing ads
119 forthright copy, 122 free with, 241 Creative Director, 95
information in ad, 138 getting Cruise, dramatizing copy for,
started, difficulties of, 95-96 163-64
humorous copy, 129-30 Curiosity-arousing copy, elements
imaginative copy, 117 length of of, 139-41
copy, 143-46 mental blocks in, Curiosity-oriented headlines,
96 news page copy, 126-27 17-19 examples of, 22, 25
opening sentences, 105-14
overstatement versus D
understatement, 153-56 present
Dates, in news-oriented
tense in, 133 reducing size of
headlines, 50 Department stores,
ads, 146-48 as sales talk, 157-58
testing ads,
second opinions about copy,
257-58 Direct-mail advertising
156-57 second person in, 133
contents of ad packet, 149,153
selling copy, 139 selling product
engaging reader, 153 length of
not idea, 148 signed copy, 123-
copy, 145-46 mail order
24 simple words in, 136-38
methods, use in,
simple writing style in, 134,136
148-49,153 Disinfectant,
for small ads, 218-19 story copy,
dramatizing copy for, 160
115-16 straightforward copy,
Dramatizing copy for
115 studying other copy, 157
cellophane, 161 for chocolate
style copy, 139 subheads in,
beverage, 162 for disinfectant,
133-34 superlative copy, 122-23
160 for English grammar
supervision/criticism of copy,
course, 163 for grave vault,
99-100 teaser copy, 126 title
162 for hand lotion, 161
copy, 124,126 trick slogans, in,
INDEX 1
Dramatizing copy (cont'd) elements of, 119 Factual copy,
164-66 elements of, 119 Famous person,
importance of, 164 for office forward of booklet written by, 173
stationery, 163 for paper Fax number, for ordering, 177
towels, 161 for sea cruise, 163- Figures, in headlines, 52, 67-68
64 for sewing machines, 162-63 Fold-over coupon, use of, 178
for statistical service, 159 Foley-Belsaw ad, 171 Forthright
Duty/honor/professionalism, copy, elements of, 122 Franklin
appeals to, 70-71 Mint ad, 44-45 Free gifts/offers
coupons versus hidden offer,
E 11, 240
Easy to read copy, 186-98 in price-oriented
contractions, use/misuse of, headlines, 54 sales call
186-87 following, 157 testing ads
versus difficult to read copy, with, 241, 243-44 use of
190-93 words in ad, 172 word
explaining words/terms in "free" in ad, 170,174 Free
writing, 189 in headlines, 194-96 information, in copy, 138
importance of, 190,193 magazine Free-standing inserts, use
titles, examples of, of, 178
196-97
rules for, G
186 Gender differences, in perception
simple presentation of of pictures, 204 Grave vault,
thoughts, 189-90 style copy, dramatizing copy for, 162 Greed,
avoiding, 188 and type, 200 appeals to, 70 Grizzard ad, 152
and uncomplicated sentences, Guess?, Inc., ad, 144
187 and words used, 136-38 and
writing style, 134,136 800 H
numbers, 10 printing in ad, 176
English grammar course, Hand lotion, dramatizing copy for,
dramatizing copy for, 163 161 Headlines of ads
Enthusiasm in written copy, 96- ads without headlines, 37
101 action in copy, 101 examples appeals in, 76 believability
of, 98-99 writing tricks for, 100- of, 26 curiosity-oriented
101 Evans ad, 206 Evanston headlines,
Hospital ad, 6-7 17-19, 22, 25 dramatizing,
164-66 elements of successful
headline, 26 importance of, 13-
F
14 logotype of advertiser in, 36
Fabrikant ad, 32 Facts news-oriented headlines, 17, 24
in copy, 141-43 in headlines, offer in, 169-70
67-68 Facts-plus-style copy,
Headlines of ads (cont'd) cautions about,I
opening sentences 129-30 elements of,
following content of, 129-30
107,109-10 quick test for, 20- Illustrations. See Layout/
21 self-interest oriented illustrations Ill-will, and
headlines, 17, appeals, 78-82 Imaginative
18, 2 copy, elements of, 117 Inquiries
3-25 for small from ads
ads, 219 hard-to-get-replies, 244-45
successful headlines, importance of, 11 Inquiries from
characteristics of, 22-15 ads, increasing address/telephone
successful/unsuccessful headlines, number printed in ad, 176
comparison of, 14-15, 33, 35, 37, attractive booklet title, 172
42-43 time for writing of, 15 type attractive description of booklet,
for headlines, 201 Headline 247
writing attractive description of
dead headline, offer, 172-73
avoiding, 33 Inquiries from ads,
direct/simple, increasing
value of, 194-96 address/telephone number
general rules, booklet forwarded by well-
30-31 guidelines known person, 173 business-
for, 31-37 key reply postcard, use of, 178 and
words in, 59-68 competition, 181,183 coupons,
length, 31, 33, 175 fax for ordering, 177 fold-
38-39 long over coupon, 178 "free" in ad,
headlines, 170,174 free-standing inserts,
handling of, 178 from hidden offers, 245,
38-39 main point in, 34 247 increasing circulation, 248
news headlines, 47-51 one- long copy, use of, 181 media,
word headlines, 63 persuasion use of, 180 methods for, 169
in, 33-34 point of view in, 31 "no obligation", emphasis on,
price-oriented headlines, 51-59 177
second opinions about from offer in headline,
headline, 38 story in headline, 169-70 offer stated in first
55 testimonial-style headlines, paragraph,
62 test for reader, 63 three- 172
word headlines, 64 two-word offer in subhead, 170
headlines, 64 words, emphasis picture of
on, 40-42 See also Key words booklet/sample,
in headlines Helmsley Hotel 170-72
ad, 103 Hidden offers, 11, 240 plain envelope, use of, 177
increasing replies from, 245, position of ads and pulling power,
247 testing ads with, 243-44 181
Hidden thoughts copy, 160 record-keeping for, 183
Hudson's ad, 53 Humorous copy seasonal factors, 181
size of ads, 180, 248
INDEX 1
Inquiries from ads, increasing 209-10 and important words,
(cont'd) split-run copy testing, 202-3 logotype of advertiser,
179 Sunday newspaper, use of, 210,
247 testimonials, 174 urging 212-13
immediate action, 177-78 male/female perception of
International Correspondence pictures, 204 photographs, use of,
Schools ad, 207 208-9 pictures with sales value,
Interrupting idea, for opening types of, 204-5 for small ads, 219-
sentence, 105 Interviews 20 type, selection/use of, 200-202
opinion testing, 237- Length of copy, 143-46
40 readership tests, alternative to long copy, 146
258-59 for direct-mail copy, 145-46
long copy to increase inquiries,
J 181 and size of ad, 181 for
space advertising, 143 Length
Jaguar ad, 150-51
of headlines, 31, 33, 38-39 long
headlines, handling of,
K
38-39 Lenox
Key numbers, to test ads, 8-9 Key ad, 135
words in headlines, 59-68 Logotype of advertiser, 210, 212-
advertiser speaking to reader, 13 in headline, 36
66 "advice," 62 "because," 61 manufacturers' names /product
beginning words in news names, examples of, 212 omitting,
headlines, 47-50 "don't buy," situations for, 212-13
64, 66 facts/figures in
headlines, 67-68 "how," 59 M
"how to," 59 "if," 61-62
for one-word headlines, 63 Mail for ad testing
questions in headlines, 67 continuing sales test, 248-
speaking to specific 49 mail order sales test,
person/group, 66-67 240-41 opinion tests by,
for testimonial-style 254-55 readership testing
headlines, 62 "this," 61 method,
for three-word headlines, 64 259-60 Mail order ads, 88-89
for two-word headlines, 64 applying rules to direct-
"wanted," 60-61 "who else," mail advertising, 148-
60 "why," 60 49,153 goal of, 86
as model for other ads, 93
results from, 88
L Mail order ads (cont'd) style of,
Land Rover ad, 16 Land's End ad, 157 Mass market appeals, easy
58 to read copy, 186-98 MCI ad, 90
Layout/illustrations, 200-214 ads Media selection, 180 Money
without illustrations, 213 appeal, 70, 74
attention getting pictures, 203-
4 captions for illustrations, 134 N
errors in picture choice, 205 News opening, opening
fine art versus commercial art, sentence, 106 News-oriented
200 heads of people in ads, headlines, 17, 26,
2 INDEX
47-51 P
beginning words in, Paper towels, dramatizing copy
47-50 date in, 50 for, 161
examples of, 24 news Photographs in ads, 208-9
writing style for, 51 See also
writing guidelines, 47- Layout/illustrations
51 News page copy, Pictures
elements of, reducing for small ads, 171 of
126-27 samples/booklets, 170-71 Pitney
"No obligation," sample phrases Bowes ad, 242 Poetic copy,
related to, 177 avoiding, 130-31 Position of ad,

o and pulling power, 181 Present

tense, use in copy, 133 Preview of
Offers. See Free gifts/offers Office article, in opening sentences, 106
stationery, dramatizing copy for, Price-oriented headlines, 51-59
163 free offer in, 54 information of
Ogilvy, David, xiii One-word value in, 54-55 payment plan in,
headlines, 63 Opening 54 price/reduced price in, 52
sentences, 105-14 examples special merchandising offer in, 52
of current openers, telling story in, 55 writing
111-14 guidelines, 52-58
following content of headline,
107, 109-10 free offer in, 172 Q
general rules for, 107,110 Questions in headlines, 67
interrupting idea for, 105 Quotation, for opening sentence,
news opening, 106 preview of 106
article, 106 quotation, 106
shocker for, 105 story, 106-7 R
Opinion testing, 237-40 errors
Reactions to ads
in, 238-39 by interview, 237-
conscious/unconscious
40 by mail, 254-55
reactions, 81
split-vote error, 239
ill-will created by appeals, 78-
Original Pet Drink
82 Readership testing method
ad, 91
increasing specificity of,
Overstatement copy
258-59 interview method,
cautions about, 156
258-59 mail method, 259-
elements of, 153-54
60 testing ads, 258-59
INDEX 177
Record-keeping, of sales efforts, testing ads, 220-21
183
Smith Barney ad, 72 Smith Kline

s Beecham Oxyn Brand ad, 246

Space advertising, length of copy,
S & S Mills ad, xix 143 Split-run copy testing,
Sales calls, following free offer, 179,194,
157 220-21, 260-66 elements
Sales comparisons, to test ads, 8 of, 261-62 quick method, 265-66
Samples testing many headlines at once,
show picture of, 170-72 266 testing series of ads, 263-64
See also Inquiries from ads, uses of, 262-63 variables in, 261
increasing Sandoz ad, 182 Split-vote error, in opinion testing,
Seasons, and advertising, 181 239 Statistical service,
Second person, use in copy, dramatizing copy for, 159 Story
133 Select Comfort ad, 10 copy
Self-interest oriented elements of, 115-16 in opening,
headlines, 106-7 success story in headlines,
17,26 examples of, 23-25 55 Straightforward copy, elements
writing of, 34-35 Selling copy, of, 115 Style copy
elements of, 139 Sewing elements of,
machines, dramatizing copy for, 139 weakness of,
162-63 Sex/sex appeal, 70 188 Subheads
Shocker, for beginning sentence, in copy, 133-34 offer in,
105 170 Sunday newspaper, ads
Signed copy, elements of, 123-24 in, 247 Superlative copy,
Simplicity elements of,
words used in copy, 136- 122-23
38 of writing style, 134,136
See also Easy to read copy T
Size of ads
and increasing inquiries from Teaser copy, elements of,
ads, 148,180 and length of 126 Tecla ad, 214
copy, 181 reducing and Telephone numbers, 800 numbers
copywriting, in ad, 10,176 Telephone response,
146-48 See also Small ads for testing ads, 249-50
Slogans, in copy, 156 Small ads Testimonials
advantages of, 217-18 for increasing inquiries to ads,
classified ads, 221-23 174 overstatement versus
copy for, 218-19 understatement, 153-56
headlines of, 219 Testimonial-style headlines,
illustrations for, 219- examples of, 62 Testing ads, 1-10
20 limitations of, 217 alternative to testing,
results from, 220 5 appeals, analysis of,
74-78
Testing ads (cont'd) basics of, 4-5 bus cards, 255
continuing sales test by mail, 248-49 with coupons, 241 department
store sales test,
257- 58 elements to test, 76-77 with free literature,
241, 243 hearing copy aloud, 237 with hidden offers, 243-44
INDEX 177
importance of, 4, 268-69 inexpensive space, use of,
179-80 key numbers, 8-9 by mail, 252-53 mail order sales test,
240-41 versus not testing, 86-87, 88-89 opinion testing, 237-40, 254-
55 pre-testing with posters/displays, 92-93
readership testing method,
258- 59
by sales comparisons, 8 self-testing ads, 77-78 small ads, 220-21
split-run copy testing, 179,194, 220-21, 260-66 steps in, 3-4
by telephone response, 249-50 test cities, 8, 255-57 testing series of
ads, 179-80 testing several ads at once,
253-54
time factors for writers, 235, 237
 INDEX

Test for reader, in ad, 63 Three-word

headlines, 64 Title copy, elements of,
124,126 Toyota ad, 41 Two-word
headlines, 64 Type
as design element, 201-2
selection/use of, 200-202 size
factors, 201-2

u
Unbelievable copy, avoiding,
131-32
Understatement copy, elements of, 154-
56 United Airlines ad, 49

w
White, Gordon, xv Words
defining in copy, 189 for emphasis in ads,
40-42 key words. See Key words in headlines
simple, in copy, 136-38 type for important
words, 202-3 Writing copy. See Copywriting;
Headline writing Writing style, simplicity,
134,136

Y
"You and me" copy, elements of, 116-17