February 16 2025

Absent
friend
Who killed Matthew Perry?
By Keiran Southern
 President Nixon gets to grips

THIS WEEK IN with chopstick diplomacy at

a banquet in Shanghai on
February 21, hosted by China’s

1972
premier, Zhou Enlai. It was the
first official visit by a US leader ON THE COVER
to mainland China — “the week Matthew Perry in 2002. The
that changed the world”, as previous year he spent more
Nixon dubbed it — establishing than two months in rehab.
diplomatic ties between the The final episode of Friends
US and the People’s Republic. was broadcast in 2004
COVER: GREG HENRY / LAMOINE / HEADPRESS / EYEVINE. THIS PAGE: ALAMY

16 The Lycra lads 41 Table Talk yourself from back problems.

16.02.2025
5 Matt Rudd
David Baddiel recounts his
460-mile French cycle ride
with his old friend Hugh Dennis
Charlie Hibbert cooks up
three tempting risottos,
Charlotte Ivers is blown away
by 17 courses in Yorkshire, and
Plus Daisy Buchanan on the
books that helped her to quit
booze — and stay sober

Following rules is for wimps 26 Cookie monster Will Lyons picks winter reds 58 A Life in the Day
How did the unassuming to get you out of a wine rut The Kenyan-born politician
6 Relative Values Biscoff biscuit conquer the Lilian Seenoi-Barr, Northern
The impressionist Rory world, asks Simon Usborne 46 Jeremy Clarkson Ireland’s first black mayor
Bremner and his artist wife, His first six-star review, for
Tessa Campbell Fraser 30 COVER: Matthew Perry the Lamborghini Revuelto —
The Friends actor was found the Spinal Tap of supercars © Times Media Ltd, 2025. Published and
8 The truth about mum brain dead from an overdose in his licensed by Times Media Ltd, 1 London
Bridge Street, London SE1 9GF (020 7782
How having kids alters our hot tub. Who is to blame? 49 Health and fitness 5000). Printed at Walstead Bicester Limited,
grey matter. By Ben Spencer Keiran Southern reports The best ways to protect Oxfordshire. Not to be sold separately

The Sunday Times Magazine • 3

 MAT T R UDD

I couldn’t beat the queue-jumpers

— so I joined them
am an upstanding member of the community. I pay a zero-tolerance police state. The shoplifters and

I
my taxes. I do my recycling. Give me just one fly-tippers would get locked up. Any littering would
other person and I’ll form an orderly queue. Only result in huge Singapore-style fines and several days
recently I’ve been wondering why I bother leading of enforced litter-picking. Any queue-jumpers would
such a blameless life. If no one else follows the be sent to queue re-education camp, the harsh
rules, why should I? conditions of which would upset human rights groups.
On Monday someone dumped a skip’s worth Sadly, none of that will happen because this isn’t an
of building waste in a lay-by near our home. On ideal world. Collective action is off the table, which
Tuesday someone saw that mess and decided to leaves individual action. I’d quite like to take the law
add another load. On Wednesday a smartly dressed into my own hands but I wore a Batman costume at
man walked straight past a very long and very a fancy dress party once and everyone was rude about
obvious queue at the Post Office and got served. On my physique. Also, the whole citizen’s arrest thing is a
Thursday a less smartly dressed man put a nice bottle bit iffy. “The courts are sympathetic to public-spirited
of wine and some cheese in his rucksack and walked citizens and the exercise of their powers and rights,” it
straight out of M&S. On Friday an able-bodied woman says at askthepolice.uk. “However, if you get it wrong
parked her Range Rover in a non-able-bodied space and you could be sued for unlawful arrest and/or false
then someone who hadn’t bought a train ticket pushed imprisonment.” Being arrested for arresting someone
through the ticket barrier right behind me. would be just my luck. And anyway, who has the time?
None of these people will face any penalties. Which leaves only one option — join them. Well
Muggins here and all you mugginses over there will dressed and in a coffee shop on Saturday morning,
pay for the fly-tipping clear-up and the nicked wine I took a deep breath and pushed to the front of
and the evaded train fare. And the bloke at the Post the queue. Someone behind me tutted and
Office and the woman in the car park will both get someone behind them said excuse me —
through their days more efficiently than us. and that was it. I panicked, pretended I was
What’s the solution? In the past tutting just taking a closer look at the menu and
sufficed. For the queue-jumpers and the petty then went to the back of the line. At the
thieves and the bad parkers and the litter bugs, supermarket I parked in a families-only
beware the roll of the eyes and the Great British parking space but someone looked at me and
tut. For the most serious offences we could my lack of a family. They didn’t even need to
even resort to an excuse me. As in, “Excuse me, tut. I was already moving. I thought about
there is a queue.” A little American but it worked. not scanning the avocado that had fallen
It doesn’t work any more. There were four tuts between the bags in my trolley, but John the
at the Post Office and the bloke simply ignored manager had just waved hello like he always
all of them. I tried a tut at the wine-and-cheese does and I lost my nerve. Maybe later I’d
thief but he did not apologise and immediately summon the courage to dump some rubbish
return his items. He just looked at me blankly in the lay-by? I didn’t.
and continued with his crime wave. I upgraded This is the trouble with being an upstanding
to the full excuse me for the woman in the citizen. You don’t want anyone to think you’re
car park and she looked angry, not not upstanding. Either I need to stop worrying
embarrassed. “I’m late,” she huffed and I had about what other people think or all the
to stop myself apologising. queue-jumping, shoplifting, fly-tipping idiots need
What do you do when people don’t mend to start worrying about what other people think.
their ways in the face of mild disapproval? In Or, my preference, we bring back the village stocks.
an ideal world you would immediately create Or we carry on as is. It will be that one, won’t it? n

Landmark buildings in Mosul, they were destroyed during £93 million restoration of Iraq’s
GOOD including the 12th-century the conflict against Islamic second city created 6,000 jobs.
CHARLIE CLIFT

Great Mosque of al-Nuri with State. About 80 per cent of Thirty per cent of the engineers

NEWS! its leaning minaret, have been

rebuilt and reopened after
Mosul’s old city was destroyed
from 2014 to 2017. Unesco’s
involved were women.
By Yasmin Choudhury

The Sunday Times Magazine • 5

 RE L ATI V E VA LU E S

Rory Bremner and Tessa Campbell Fraser

The impressionist and his artist wife on ADHD, showjumping and jokes with the King

Rory thing because Tessa takes the lead. She makes the big
I first saw Tessa at an exhibition for my friend Charlie’s decisions and if we argue about something, eight out
wildlife charity, Tusk. She had very pale blue striking of ten times she’s right, so I’ve learnt to give in early.
eyes. A couple of weeks later he asked her to meet me at My job is to keep her happy.
the station in Edinburgh for another event. She looked The hardest time for her was when the children
lovely, sitting with her beloved spaniel, Mr Mole, in a were small — Ava is 23 now and Lila is 21. All hell was
pleasantly messy car — she’d been transporting guinea breaking loose at home and I couldn’t be there. For an
fowl for a sculpture she was doing. For a prank, she told artist, that stage of motherhood was quite a sacrifice.
Charlie I’d missed the train so straight away we were in Later, I became a pony club dad, ferrying Lila across
cahoots and I liked that. the country. We were told to introduce our children
I’d been on my own for five years after my divorce to ponies because it keeps them away from drugs and
and work had become my thing — between 1994 and boys. The cost was ruinous. If I had my time again I’d
1999 I made two series a year of Bremner, Bird and introduce them to as many drugs and boys as possible
Fortune. I was so busy, I didn’t think I needed anyone. to keep them away from ponies. I did love driving the
But weeks after we met, Tessa and I went on holiday to horse lorry, but of course I crashed it. It must be like
southern Spain and I proposed in an empty mountain being married to Frank Spencer.
restaurant. It was pure impulse. I loved her artistic talent.
And how, when we stopped at little villages to paint, Tessa
she’d rinse her brush in her gin and tonic then drink it. Just after we got engaged, Rory and I were wandering
She seemed like an adult who knew how to be a child. round Harrrods’ china department looking at crockery
Tessa is practical and efficient; I’m hopelessly and suddenly I heard this almighty crash. I thought,
impractical. If I try to mend something I will make don’t let that be him. But up popped his head and he
it worse. Come to our house and you’ll find her arc said in the voice of Frank Spencer, “I’m having a little
welding or mending the boiler and I’ll be making bit of a bother here, Betty.” I should have realised what
muffins. One New Year’s Eve I made a Thai soup. We was ahead of me, shouldn’t I?
were going to be 14 for dinner. The recipe said allow
two chillies per person but it tasted like a fire alarm
going off in my mouth. I rang Antony Worrall
Thompson, who cooked at our wedding, and said,
Seven weeks after we met,
“Antony, I’ve put 28 chillies in the soup, what can I proposed in an empty mountain
I do?” And he said, “I’m afraid you’re f***ed.”
Tessa calls me Mr B, after Mr Bean. Fondly, I think. restaurant. It was pure impulse
I can get lost in lifts or telephone kiosks. She knows she
can’t rely on me to do anything without mishap and
there’s a kind of amused resignation. You’re looking at
the man she tolerates. Mainly I just try to be kind. My
mantra is: make the effort. With Tessa it’s: how can I
enable her career? She works so fast, you turn your back
and she’s sculpted a five-metre sperm whale from latex
and silk or put all the clay on a figure for a bronze. She
has always had amazing skill at representational art but
her transition into conceptual art is astonishing. Her
studio door closes and magic happens.
There is a lot of stress with family life, sometimes
caused by me and my ADHD. I live in my head a fair
bit because I’m always preparing a show. I still have Main: Rory, 63, and
impostor syndrome; I fret and put myself under Tessa, 58, at home
immense pressure and that’s probably not easy for in Oxfordshire.
Tessa. I try to make time to be an advocate for ADHD, Right: in London
because it’s really difficult; it takes you through a world around the time of
of frustration and despair. With family life, I just think, their engagement,
what can I do to help? I do realise that’s quite a man summer 1999

6 • The Sunday Times Magazine

 PORTRAIT BY GARETH IWAN JONES

I’m not the kind of person who falls in love at first He says ADHD is his worst enemy and his best
sight. But when Rory proposed seven weeks after we
STRANGE friend. He’ll write a song in two hours that would take
met, I had no doubts — and I’d been asked twice HABITS anyone else four days, and can hold about 16 voices in
before, so I knew what wrong felt like. We were born six his head — like being tuned to multiple radio stations
years apart in the same hospital in Edinburgh and being Tessa at once. He’ll be Trump, then Biden, sidestep into
with him was a bit like coming home. I’m a country girl If I ask him to Clinton and cut to King Charles in seconds. He has
— I grew up in the Scottish Borders and need soil do something, absolutely no filter. The last time he met the King he
beneath my feet — and Rory, who was brought up in it will take him said, “You’re head of state and now you’re head of
Edinburgh, is a city man, never happier than when he’s a week at least prostate.” The King thought it was very funny.
in a coffee shop, but we share similar values. He’s an I was brought up to be practical: if something doesn’t
incredibly thoughtful and open-hearted human being. Rory work, you fix it. Rory is really incapable around the
He desperately wants people to be happy and he wants We’ve travelled house. The thing that makes us so compatible is that
to help — to his detriment sometimes. I worry he’ll thousands of we’re both creatives and we understand the need to
drop dead if he doesn’t slow down. miles to take disappear. We live in Oxfordshire but Rory will stay
He doesn’t do many voices at home but he’s happy our daughter three or four nights a week at our flat in London. Unless
to perform at a dinner party if he’s asked. He so wants to showjumping there’s a family crisis I never say, “Don’t go.” If I didn’t
to do a good job, you can see him disappearing into his events but Tessa let him be who he is, he’d be miserable. Equally, he
head, trying to think of the perfect thing to say. There’s can never bear understands my need to shut myself in my studio and
a lot of self-doubt but it propels him forward. It’s to watch. She do my art. But he’s always there to pick me up when life
exhausting but it’s what makes him a true artist. hides in the loo throws a curveball. We’re a really good team n
The neurodiversity is harder to live with. Day to day, Interviews by Caroline Scott.
there is always a drama. This morning I couldn’t find my Tessa Campbell Fraser’s Whales: A Deeper Dialogue is
phone. Rory’s is on the counter; mine is in his pocket. at Winchester Cathedral until February 26, then moves
Or he’ll park the car somewhere with the keys left in it. to Rochester Cathedral. Rory Bremner’s Making an
He gets really cross with himself but it’s just who he is. Impression tour starts on May 28; fane.co.uk

The Sunday Times Magazine • 7

THIS IS
YOUR
BRAIN
P
PAREN
S
“Mum brain” isn’t a myth: having
kids physically alters our grey matter.
And dads, it happens to you too.
Ben Spencer, science editor and
frazzled father of two, explains

ILLUSTRATIONS BY ROB FLOWERS

N ON
NTING
his was a full-on meltdown, an end-of-days
tantrum. Fists clenched, his face streaming
with tears and snot, my three-year-old son
was furious. “Daddy!” he wailed, throwing
his head back. “You’ve ruined it!” Ben Spencer
I had cut the potato waffles precisely into with his younger
quarters and sprinkled grated cheese over son, here aged
the top, just as he had wanted them the six months
previous week. “The cheese should be
on the side, not the top,” he screamed,
red-faced. “And I didn’t want them cut up!” evidence suggests at least some of this In the modern world, where men and
I could feel my stress levels rising. But on transformation is lasting, persisting for at women often juggle child rearing with
a rainy weeknight, with more work to tackle least six years, with some changes still seen demanding careers, it can seem harder
once the kids were in bed, an escalating decades later. They call this period of than ever. To cope, our brains need some
battle was something I did not need. My change matrescence. And recent research tweaking, some specialisation. After
brain was whirring, considering my options. reveals that new fathers also experience a speaking to leading neuroscientists,
My instinct was to shout back. I could tell neurological metamorphosis, especially if psychologists and anthropologists, I’ve
him to eat up or go to bed hungry. Or I they take a hands-on approach to parenting. built up an idea of what happens to the
could slide the waffles over to my older son, On a good day the parental brain is our brains of mothers and fathers.
aged seven, who had cleared his plate, and superpower, it gives us the ability to foresee This is my brain on parenthood. It is
make another batch for the little one. our child’s every want and need, helping us probably yours too.
If you have young kids you might be to nurture and shape a fully functioning
wincing sympathetically, recalling similar citizen of the human race. On a bad day — Mum brain
conflicts in your own household. Parents of and, let’s be honest, there are a few of those Women undergo huge changes during
older children may think I need to get a grip — it simply helps us survive. pregnancy. Growing baby bumps, swelling
and lay down some discipline. And those “The human child is so dependent for so feet and morning sickness are obvious.
without children are probably just baffled, long,” says Gina Rippon, professor emeritus The body is also flooded with new
wondering how some toasted waffles could of cognitive neuroimaging at Aston hormones: oestrogen and progesterone
prompt such drama. University. “Baby giraffes get up on their support the foetus in the early weeks before
But I have a parent’s brain. Scientists feet within two minutes of birth and off the placenta takes over, oxytocin triggers
have known for some time that “mum they go. Human parenting is probably the contractions and promotes bonding, and
brain” — where new mothers experience most difficult form of parenting there is.” prolactin starts lactation. The endocrine
scattiness, even memory loss — is real. It system — the network of glands, tissues
turns out that “dad brain” is a thing too. and organs that produces hormones to
But a parent’s brain doesn’t develop in the regulate our bodily functions — goes into
way you might think. It’s easy to assume overdrive. As the writer Lucy Jones puts it
that child rearing causes some sort of in Matrescence, her book on motherhood:
neurological damage, our brains addled by “It is likely the most drastic endocrine
sleep deprivation and stress. In fact parents’ event in human life.” These changes also
brains are finely tuned machines — highly resculpt the brain.
evolved in response to thousands of Last September scientists at the
generations of tiny screaming humans. University of California, Santa Barbara
Scientists now know that motherhood in published a study in which they scanned
particular triggers the biggest neurological the brain of a 38-year-old woman every
change of any point since childhood, even few weeks from before conception until
more dramatic than that seen in teenagers. LOW-RES
two years after childbirth. The 26 scans
They used to think that these alterations revealed pronounced changes over the
were temporary — a fleeting hormonal period, with “few regions untouched by the
surge required for pregnancy, labour and transition to motherhood”, the authors said
the early months of infancy. But emerging in the journal Nature Neuroscience. ➤

The Sunday Times Magazine • 11

 The most obvious change was a decrease
in the volume of grey matter, the wrinkly INSIDE A PARENT’S BRAIN
outer layer of the brain involved in memory
Cerebral cortex Prefrontal cortex Posterior cingulate cortex
and emotions. This loss of brain tissue may
The wrinkly layer of grey matter Critical for emotion Involved in empathy and
seem like a bad thing, reinforcing the idea that covers the surface of the regulation and bonding, helping to see
of a scatty “mum brain”. There may indeed brain, responsible for cognitive decision making a situation from another's
be a short-term impact on memory. But functions including memory point of view
scientists think this is in fact “synaptic and learning
pruning”, a shedding of unnecessary tissue
to enable new connections to be forged.
The location of car keys or the
password for an email account fades into
insignificance at such a time. Unimportant
memories are culled as the brain becomes
more efficient and streamlined, preparing
a new mum to learn the skills of child
rearing and focus her attention on keeping Hypothalamus
her offspring alive. Involved in pregnancy
The impact on memory, however, is and lactation; controls
temporary and minor — and there is some Amygdala incentive-reward circuits;
Superior Receives and processes produces, regulates
evidence that, long-term, the power of temporal sulcus sensory cues such as and processes hormones
recall might actually be improved. Responsible for an infant's cry; raises such as oxytocin
At the same time the amygdala — a small social perception awareness of threats and dopamine
almond-shaped structure, one of a number
of interconnected parts that make up the
limbic system of the brain, responsible for
processing sensory information — has a so was in intensive care on a different floor. “The neuroscience shows fathers are just
surge in activity. This is why new parents It was me who put on his first nappy (badly) as capable as mothers,” Rippon says.
are primed to jolt awake at the sound of and spent the night annoying the nurses, Women who bear children and give birth
crying and become hyperalert to signs of knocking out his tubes and wires each time have a head start — the vast hormonal,
danger in a playground or on the street. But I picked him up. physiological and neurological changes
the way these signals are processed also As I did so, my brain was changing. they undergo in pregnancy are a necessity,
changes, with the stress response triggered Studies tell us new dads see their oxytocin not a choice. Whether dads develop similar
by crying becoming damped down over levels rise as testosterone, which is circuits seems to be influenced by how
time in order to stop parents losing their involved in aggression and competition, much time they spend with their children
minds from the constant noise. falls. Even prolactin — the hormone that in the early years — a core argument for
Rippon says: “In the middle of this we promotes lactation in breastfeeding paid shared parental leave.
also have the tiny little infant, who is a social mothers — can rise in men. “Traditional models of parenting —
manipulator of the highest order. They’re This is not universal. The changes seen where mothers are hands-on carers and
born with their social radar finely tuned in mothers do not always kick in for dads. fathers are breadwinners — reinforce
— and that’s how they survive.” “Fathers have the capacity to be involved gendered brain responses,” Rippon says.
Mothers becomes highly attuned to these caregivers but it’s not obligate — it doesn’t So if a dad doesn’t see changing nappies
signals as their reward system is rewired always happen,” says James K Rilling, as his job, it is less likely he will wake up in
inside the hypothalamus — a small part professor of psychology at Emory the night when the baby cries. His brain
of the brain that controls many bodily University in Atlanta, Georgia, and the won’t develop the coping mechanisms.
functions, including sleep, hunger and body author of Father Nature. He will also be more likely to lose his rag
temperature. A region of the hypothalamus Some will say that women are therefore when his kids start throwing tantrums.
called the medial preoptic area is filled better hardwired to be caregivers than men. Darby Saxbe, professor of psychology
with new receptors for oxytocin, the “love But dads who do care for their children at the University of Southern California, is
hormone”. The hypothalamus also starts experience remarkably similar changes to one of the growing number of researchers
pumping out dopamine, the “feelgood” the reward and caring centres of their brains. with hard evidence that “dad brain” is real.
hormone. The smell of a baby’s head, She scanned the brains of first-time
every smile or laugh, triggers this reward fathers in Barcelona and Los Angeles during
circuit. Studies on mother rats suggest their partners’ pregnancy and again when
raising their pups can be more rewarding in the babies were born. “We found that men
terms of dopamine production than cocaine. showed volume decreases in a lot of the
same areas that had been seen in women,”
Dad brain Saxbe says. “We saw the same overall pattern
Scientists used to think that these changes of brain change. But the men’s changes were
were unique to mothers. But in recent years more subtle and they were more variable.”
researchers have found similar changes Crucially, fathers’ intentions — whether
often take place in fathers. they planned to take time off when the
The night my first son was born I sat child was born, and whether they already
over his plastic NHS crib all night, too felt bonded to their unborn child during
frightened to sleep in case he stopped pregnancy — influenced whether the
breathing. He had been born via emergency brain changes came about. “The dads
caesarean after a four-day labour and my who are more motivated and spent more
wife was confined to her bed, recovering time with the babies had more brain
from surgery. Our boy had suspected sepsis, change,” Saxbe says. ➤

The Sunday Times Magazine • 13

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Genetics are irrelevant she says. “So this might be evidence that,
All of this makes evolutionary sense. It to whatever extent dads are investing more,
takes more than one person to raise a child. An analysis of they might be showing some of the same
And it’s not always the father who steps psychological health repercussions.”
up. It might be a grandmother, an aunt, 13,000 MRI There are two explanations. First, the
a stepfather or adoptive parents. It might
be two dads or two mums. scans found that more hands-on you are, the more you will
feel the difficulties of parenthood. But,
The extent to which the wiring of the
brain is activated is nothing to do with a
parents who had second, the reduction in testosterone
among new dads might affect their mental
genetic link to the child. It seems, rather,
to be one of exposure. To have a full-blown
brought up two or health. “When men have lower testosterone
after the birth, they are more likely to report
parent brain, however, you need to be the
one taking responsibility for the child.
three children had symptoms of postpartum depression,”
Saxbe says. “But their partners report fewer
The neuroscientist Ruth Feldman, a significantly symptoms of postpartum depression. It’s
a professor at Reichman University, near actually better, if you’re a mum, to have a
Tel Aviv in Israel, scanned the brains of lower “brain age” partner with lower testosterone.”
89 couples with new babies. Roughly half Fatherhood, as with motherhood, is a
of the couples were heterosexual, with matter of give and take. And when parents
a “traditional” division of labour — the raise children as a genuine joint enterprise,
mother acting as primary caregiver and about feeding ourselves. The worst thing is studies suggest their relationship may be
the father a secondary or “helper” parent. the sleep deprivation, particularly when strengthened. The empathy and caring
The rest of the couples were gay dads, they are very small. When parents don’t circuits, renewed by parenthood, have
with parenting shared between them. The get enough sleep it scrambles our ability to a benefit for their partnership too.
participants had their brains scanned while organise memories, perhaps another reason There is another silver lining to all this,
watching videos of themselves playing with for the scatty element of “parent brain”. though it is one that may be viewed with
their own babies. All the parents showed Sleep deprivation also exaggerates scepticism by exhausted parents just about
activation in the cortex, the part of the brain dopamine signalling in the reward circuits, clinging on to their sanity. The brain doesn’t
that cognitively processes a child’s actions which is why some people cope by wolfing just bounce back from the demands of
and calculates what they might need. down junk food or drinking too much. Sleep parenthood. There is some evidence that
There were differences, however. The problems can also disrupt the working of it might improve its functioning. All that
mothers’ amygdala, which processes sensory the amygdala, distorting how we read social multitasking has a lasting benefit.
cues, showed nearly a fivefold surge in cues, perhaps a trigger for the ending of so One study, published in 2020, suggested
activity when watching their own children many relationships in early parenthood. that long-term changes to the parental
than when they weren’t. Their partners, the It is no surprise that eight in ten women brain improve its functioning. Analysis of
“secondary carer” men, saw a small bump suffer so-called “baby blues” and one in ten 13,000 MRI scans in the UK Biobank — the
in activity, but not nearly as much as the have postnatal depression. Far more severe world’s largest collection of biomedical data
mums. But among the gay dads — each of is postpartum psychosis, a mental illness — found that mothers and fathers who had
them joint “primary” carers — the amygdala that can involve confusion, delusion and brought up two or three children had a
saw a surge as big as those seen in the hallucinations, which affects one in a significantly lower “brain age” (a marker
mothers. Crucially, whether the gay dad thousand new mothers. And it’s not just for the health of their brain compared with
was the genetic father made no difference. mothers — about one in ten new fathers their real age) than those who had no
Sarah Blaffer Hrdy, a renowned American suffer from depression in the months after children. They also had faster response
anthropologist and primatologist, a baby is born. times and made fewer mistakes in a visual
summarises the findings in her book Father When Saxbe carried out her brain memory task. You may be tired, stressed
Time. Changes to the amygdala were seen scanning study on new dads, she found it and overwhelmed, but parenting might just
only “when the baby’s safety and wellbeing was those who were more involved — the keep you young.
had become that man’s primary concern ones who had the greatest changes to their Having learnt all that, I reassessed what
day after day”. When a man took on the role brain — who suffered the most. happened in my brain during the wafflegate
of primary parent, rather than an assistant, “We know that early parenthood kind incident. As the crisis unfolded at the
he “found himself steeped in the sights, of sucks for mums because it can be dinner table, my amygdala was busy making
smells, sounds and other cues from a baby depressing and isolating and repetitive,” sense of the sights and sounds assaulting
whose wellbeing depended on him”. Only my senses, processing my son’s crying and
then did his brain show change to the same toning down my stress response.
degree as that seen in a mother. My prefrontal cortex, which regulates
It is too simple to say that these circuits my emotions, was running at full blast,
are simply switched on and off at will. But reining in my natural instincts to fight
intention, necessity and hands-on time with back. My reduced testosterone levels
a child all play a role in activating them. “It is damped down the fight-or-flight response,
maybe not a conscious decision,” says Saxbe stopping me from screaming back or
at the University of Southern California. storming out. And my boosted oxytocin
“There’s bonding and love involved. And it levels increased my compassion and
takes repetition, practice and investment. empathy, helping me see the whole event
Great fathers are made, not born.” from the point of view of my child: a tiny
growing boy desperately trying to exert
Do our kids f*** us up? some control in a world in which his every
It isn’t all domestic bliss. Parenting is act is dictated by others.
exhausting and emotional. Most evenings, I gave in, pushing the plate over to my
when the kids are finally in bed, my wife and older son, and got up to make another plate
I collapse on the sofa, too battered to think of waffles n

The Sunday Times Magazine • 15

“We talked about
everything: life,
love, children
and how much
my arse was
hurting”

16 • The Sunday Times Magazine

Thirty-five years on from
The Mary Whitehouse
Experience, could
David Baddiel keep
up with Hugh Dennis
on a bromantic 460-
mile cycle along the
towpaths of France?
(The ebike helped)
The Sunday Times Magazine • 17
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 I’VE
done a fair amount of globetrotting in my time, but
there are two areas of travel that I’m a bit light on:
cycling trips and France. I like France but something
about it has always seemed, to me, a little route one.
It feels, from the point of view of the UK, too obvious.
My opinion of holidaying in the country may also have
been coloured early on because the first time I ever went
abroad — a trip I was intensely excited about before it
The comedians
visited Kenya and
Uganda together
on the Red Nose
African Convoy in
2017. Below, from
left: Rob Newman,
David Baddiel,
two village teams in Italy. Which is fun, but more for
the food than the football. Also, as time has gone on,
the football pitches seem to have got larger: last time
I considered bringing a CPAP machine, not for sleep
apnoea but to recover from each attempt to run down
the wing.
One of the other men who plays for that team is Hugh
Dennis, he of the classic BBC comedy Outnumbered,
happened — was on a school day trip to Boulogne. I was Hugh Dennis and and of the even more classic — in the sense of even
much less excited about it after it happened. Steve Punt in The longer ago — BBC sketch show The Mary Whitehouse
Cycling ranks even lower on my list of things I’ve Mary Whitehouse Experience, which we were both in. I had met Hugh
done abroad, although I have hired bikes for rides Experience, 1992 in the Cambridge Footlights before we did TMWE,
around Ubud in Bali and a lake overlooked by Mount but he is two years older than me, so it was only then
Fuji in Japan. Both were fun but there was a key element that we became close friends. We come from somewhat
that distinguished them from actual cycling holidays: different backgrounds: as I may have occasionally
they lasted a few hours. Exertion is something I prefer publicly mentioned, I’m Jewish — my dad’s family are
to avoid on a vacation. Years ago I used to ski but was mainly rabbis and my mother was a refugee from the
always rubbish at it and now would be convinced that Nazis, whereas Hugh’s dad was, um, the Bishop of St
at any moment I’d be about to career out of control Edmundsbury and Ipswich.
into Gwyneth Paltrow. Once a year I go with my Despite this binary-opposite upbringing and the
seven-a-side football team to play eleven-a-side against blokishness of playing a lot of football together,➤

THE MOST
DIFFICULT RIDE I
HAVE TRIED IN MY
PREVIOUS PAGES: STRAWBERRY BLONDE TV. THIS PAGE: BBC

LIFE WAS FROM MY

HOUSE IN NW3 TO
WEMBLEY. IT TOOK
45 MINUTES BUT
IT WAS RAINING
The Sunday Times Magazine • 19
Savour Every Moment
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 we have a stupidly affectionate relationship. We’ve
done a couple of TV travel shows together
— notably World’s Most Dangerous Roads in Ethiopia Bordeaux
and The Red Nose African Convoy in Kenya and
Uganda. In Ethiopia, when I insisted on stopping the
F R A N C E
car for a bowel movement on the side of the road
Arcachon
(thanks for filming all that, BBC2), that did not stop
Hugh from saying, out loud, to camera: “The thing is,
I love David Baddiel.” I think, given that on these
The approach
trips it tends to be me causing various forms of chaos, to the canals
which he has to sit through gamely and often sort Black Mountain
out, the love may be mainly paternal. He also makes Canal de Garonne Toulouse
a point of hugging me before every single seven-a-side
Canal du Midi
game. Although he also always, while hugging, says: Sète
Castelnaudary
“You’re a dead man.”
Carcassonne
Meanwhile, I note he has never felt the need, on the
Italy football trip, to bring a CPAP. Plus he loves cycling. A N D O R R A
In 2007 he completed L’Etape du Tour, which is “an
organised mass participation cyclosportive that allows
amateur cyclists to race over the same route as a Tour S P A I N
40 miles
de France stage”. I mean, just reading that in Wikipedia
exhausted me. I was out of breath by cyclosportive
without even knowing what it means.
So it felt like a little bit of a mismatch when I was asked An engraving from
to film a TV series for Channel 4 with Hugh in which 1788 of the
we both cycle along the Canal du Midi, the centuries- presentation of
old French waterway that connects the Atlantic to the the Canal du Midi
Mediterranean. While Hugh has basically done the project to Louis XIV
Tour de France, the most difficult ride I have tried in
my life would probably be from my house in NW3 to
Wembley, which took about 45 minutes (although,
to be fair, it was raining). The route is 460 miles long.
The canal route, I mean, not the one to Wembley.
However, it sounded fun so I agreed, with a very
important caveat: I asked to bring my own bike.
Which, reader, I now must tell you — and this may
involve revising your sense of how arduous that cycle
to Wembley really was — is an ebike. Specifically,
a VanMoof, which ebike aficionados will know is a
company that went bankrupt a couple of years ago.
But ebike aficionados who go the extra mile (with
assistance, of course) will know that there is an Remarkably, everyone — even Hugh, who was
ex-VanMoof employee called — truly coincidentally, unsurprisingly planning to do the whole route
I’m sure — Dan Moof, who runs a dedicated VanMoof pedalling just with his leg muscles — agreed to this
repair shop on the Caledonian Road in London, which cheat. So we met with our bikes (his, for the non-ebike
means I’ve been able to keep mine going. aficionados, was a Cube Nulane One) on a pier at a Bay
of Biscay-facing resort called Arcachon. Obviously, the
first issue was gear. Not having been on a cycling trip,
or even done any proper cycling, I have never worn
IT WAS NEWS TO any Lycra. But even though my cycling on this trip was
still improper I had bought a cycling jacket, shoes and

ME THAT CYCLING — most importantly — shorts. It was news to me that

cycling shorts include what appears to be a nappy
section. Although many cyclists are late-middle-aged

SHORTS INCLUDE men, this has nothing to do with incontinence. Rather,

it is a cushion, in my case disturbingly blood-red,
designed to help your undercarriage sustain 460
A NAPPY SECTION miles on a canal towpath.
The canal route itself begins just outside Bordeaux

— TO HELP YOUR — on the Canal de Garonne — and continues towards

and beyond Toulouse, where it joins the Canal du Midi.
Canals are another area in which my experience and

UNDERCARRIAGE understanding are a bit lacking. Another type of

holiday I’ve never taken, you may not be surprised

SUSTAIN 460 MILES to hear, is one where I putt-putt down Norfolk

BRIDGEMAN IMAGES

waterways on a narrow boat. Hugh, meanwhile, did

geography at university and seems to know everything

ON A TOWPATH there is to know about locks, dams and drainage

management. Some of this turned out, amazingly, to ➤

The Sunday Times Magazine • 21

 MY RIGHT KNEE
WASN’T HAPPY.
HUGH AND I TOOK
OUR RELATIONSHIP
DEEPER THAN WE
HAVE IN 40 YEARS
WITH A SPOT OF
ROADSIDE MASSAGE
be interesting, and that 8 per cent of conversation From top: David and
has made it into the show. Hugh enjoy a “very
Together, we found out a lot about the Canal du Zen” ride along the
Midi. It was built in the 17th century by an engineer Canal du Midi; Hugh
called Pierre-Paul Riquet, with the purpose of turns physio on the
creating an international trade route through France. towpath; a vineyard
Unfortunately it took 14 years to construct — not least stop outside
because Riquet, remarkably for the time, insisted on Béziers, near the
good labour conditions for his workers, and partly end of their trip
because Louis XIV, who had spent too much on a
palace for himself at Versailles and wasn’t known for
his project stamina, lost interest. It was eventually
completed just after Riquet died, which meant he
never got to see it being filled with water via aqueducts
from the Black Mountain range.
There’s much more we learnt about its history. But
the principal thing I know now about the Canal du Midi
is that it is fantastic to cycle along. The long stretch of
green water bordered by poplars standing like ancient
sentries along its route creates an endless vista, and
it’s very Zen to flow yourself on wheels along the side
of the water. In early autumn, when leaves from the
poplars fall gently onto its banks, the canal is a rich
shade of green, flowing with a serene deliberation in
a timeless forward motion.
It’s slightly less Zen, having said that, to make a TV
show while you’re cycling it. One thing you won’t see
should you watch Two Men on a Bike (a clearly incorrect
title; we aren’t on a tandem) is the long, also bike-
powered train of directors, crew and researchers always
in front of us, really not making it so peaceful for us
— or indeed other cyclists passing us as we filmed.
Plus Hugh and I had GoPros all over our bikes and
microphones all over our helmets to record our every
word, which makes it harder to lose yourself in the
serenity of the scene.
One subject we talked about a lot was food. This is
because I am always at some level thinking about food,
particularly if I’ve got up at 7am to cycle along a canal.
Luckily, we were in France. Pierre-Paul Riquet’s unafraid of norovirus. As we moved south, towards
17th-century ingenuity means the canal connects Castelnaudary and the gated medieval wonder of
STRAWBERRY BLONDE TV

myriad fabulous towns and villages in this part of the Carcassonne, the food became richer and more
country and all of them, of course, appear to have the duck-based, which allowed Hugh and me to dine
best boulangeries and cafés imaginable. In Bordeaux, regularly on the local speciality, cassoulet. I also briefly
where seafood is a big deal, the oysters are unbelievably broke my no-alcohol rule — one I’ve established not
fresh, like balls of brined butter, and I gorged on those, due to alcoholism but because, as I’ve got older, ➤

The Sunday Times Magazine • 23

 hangovers have got harder — because, come on, we David Baddiel in Most importantly — spoiler alert — we made it. To
were in Bordeaux. These factors may be why I came Hampstead, north the Mediterranean, that is, where we celebrated, of
back from this trip — on which, ebike or no, I had been London, with course, by heading straight for another amazing meal
cycling for six hours a day — about half a stone heavier. his VanMoof ebike by the water. What Hugh and I were celebrating, in
It all sounds idyllic, and indeed it was, but I should some way, was our midlife crisis. But should you watch
add that it was not without moments of anxiety. The Two Men on a Bike, what you may notice is that the
towpath along the canal gets at some points very setting — the canal, the cafés, France — is conducive
narrow and cobbly. The VanMoof — made, basically, to conversation. It’s a very good space, being on bikes,
for Soho — didn’t like this at all. I wondered more on the Canal du Midi, to set the world, or at least your
than once if there was a secret James Bond-like world, to rights. On the journey, we seemed to talk
button somewhere on the handlebars that could about everything that two men on bikes might ever
quickly transform it into an aquabike for the want to — life, love, children, careers, mortality, time
inevitable moment when I cycled into the water. and, of course, how much my arse was hurting despite
My right knee didn’t love the trip in general — at one the cushioning of the nappy in my shorts. As soon as
point Hugh and I had to take our relationship into I get out of this ice bucket, I’m going back.
deeper areas than we ever have in 40 years with a Oh, and by the way, in case you’re wondering why
spot of roadside massage. Cycling into the big cities there’s nothing from Hugh in this piece, I did ask him
— Toulouse and Bordeaux particularly — meant, for a quote about the trip — and he said that because
suddenly, cars. Weirdly, some French drivers didn’t I had insisted on an electric bike, I “could get that
seem to particularly like having to go round two from ChatGPT” n
British cyclists and, in front of them, a long train
of British camera crew. We also got lost a couple of Baddiel and Dennis: Two Men on a Bike starts
times and ended up pedalling bumpily through tomorrow at 9pm on More4. David Baddiel’s
wheat fields, which is not as much fun as it may musical, The Parent Agency, is at Chester
sound to Theresa May. Storyhouse until March 2; storyhouse.com

ONE SUBJECT WE
TALKED ABOUT
A LOT WAS FOOD.
DESPITE CYCLING
SIX HOURS A DAY,
DEAN BELCHER FOR THE SUNDAY TIMES MAGAZINE

I CAME BACK FROM

THIS TRIP HALF A
STONE HEAVIER
The Sunday Times Magazine • 25
 THE LIT TLE

THAT

THE WORLD

26 • The Sunday Times Magazine

BISCUIT

TOOK OVER

A factory in Belgium has been quietly baking away for nearly

a century but last year its revenue topped £1 billion and
Snoop Dogg declared himself a fan. How did Biscoff go from
hairdresser freebie to Gen Z obsession, asks Simon Usborne
 licensing deals, from a dangerously good
Biscoff spread to Krispy Kreme Biscoff
doughnuts and a Lotus Biscoff McFlurry.
Then there are Biscoff-flecked Milkybars,
KitKats and — soon — Cadbury products.
My local Sainsbury’s has 15 items with
the Biscoff name on the label, including
ice cream sticks and cheesecake.
Foodsnobs, a street-food restaurant in
the Shropshire town of Bridgnorth, has
billed itself “the home of Biscoff fried
chicken” — they coat it in Biscoff crumbs
and add a Biscoff drizzle, which apparently
sells well, whether or not it sounds
remotely appealing.
“It’s just so versatile,” says Eloise Head,
aka Fitwaffle, an influencer turned food
writer whose latest book, Fitwaffle’s Easy
Air Fryer, contains five Biscoff recipes,
including an apple crumble and a French
toast bake. “It’s an alternative to chocolate
hen Jan Boone was about seven he sneaked — with bigger plans in 1974. Jan remembers that’s delicious in pretty much any dessert
out of his home in Lembeke — a small travelling with him as a teenager to the US but also has a unique flavour,” she says.
Belgian town just north of Ghent — to raid in the mid-1980s. Lotus had struck a deal A video of Head making no-bake Biscoff
his family’s biscuit factory. The smell of to supply its speculoos to an airline as an cheesecake bars has scored 67 million views
caramelising sugar hanging over the town in-flight snack under a new name: Biscoff, across TikTok and Instagram since she
intoxicated its children. “I loved to eat the a portmanteau of “biscuit” and “coffee”. posted it in 2022. “Sometimes I just add
raw dough,” Boone, who is now 53, tells me Forty years later the fourth Boone to Biscoff spread to chopped-up apple,” says
in a video call. run Lotus — Jan took over from his father, the Surrey-based former gym manager, 30,
Boone’s grandfather, also called Jan, Matthieu, Karel’s brother, in 2011 — has a full-time food influencer since 2019.
had devised the still-secret recipe for the transformed a low-key freebie handed out Meanwhile the biscuits, whether they
biscuits, which he called Lotus, in 1932. by airlines, hairdressers and cafés into an end up in packs or individually wrapped, are
They were speculoos, a simplified version unlikely global snacking juggernaut and now made at a rate of more than 20 million
of speculaas, the spiced festive treats that Gen Z obsession. a day, in factories in Belgium and the US.
have been revered for centuries in Belgium Armies of food influencers on TikTok Sainsbury’s sells them at £1.70 for 16 —
and the Netherlands. and Instagram have cooked up viral Biscoff at 69p/100g, that’s more by weight than
Lotus speculoos became popular largely “hacks” and recipes for tiramisus, cakes, McVitie’s Digestives (53p/100g), but a good
in the same region, and were marketed as milkshakes, mousses and blondies. Ice chunk cheaper than Oreos (97p/100g).
an accompaniment to coffee. But Jan Jr’s cream sellers will roll your scoop in Biscoff When Snoop Dogg talked Vogue readers
uncle, Karel Boone, took over the family crumbs. The biscuit has also spawned an through the contents of his travel bag in a
firm — which became Lotus Bakeries artery-bothering range of spin-offs and video shot at the Paris Olympics last
summer, he pulled out Snoop-branded
wine and crisps, a can of gin and juice —
and a single Biscoff. “This motherf***er
right here is bomb!” he said, holding it up
before eating it. “Whatever this flavour is,
y’all got this down to a science!”
There’s a small amount of cinnamon in
Biscoff but the principal caramel flavour
comes from kandij sugar, a Belgian
confection made by heating white beet
sugar. Somehow the resulting biscuits
are crumbly yet snappy, like the Flemish
lovechild of shortbread and ginger snaps.
They’re also extremely sweet, containing
3g sugar per 8g biscuit — more than twice
the proportion of sugar in a digestive.
Clockwise from “That was quite impactful,” Boone says
above left: packaging of Snoop Dogg’s unexpected endorsement.
for Lotus speculoos “The whole team felt quite proud.” And
c 1956; the rapper rightfully so: Biscoff ’s global popularity,
Snoop Dogg after more than 90 years of gentle baking,
endorses the biscuits boosted Lotus’s revenues above €1.2 billion
last year; the spread (£1 billion) last year, a rise of 16 per cent on
is a favourite with the previous year. Net profits were up 19 per
Gen Z; Jan Boone Sr, cent to almost €156 million.
the company founder. The company, which is majority-owned
Top: Krispy Kreme’s by the Boone and Stevens families — the
Biscoff doughnut latter another Belgian baking dynasty that

28 • The Sunday Times Magazine

 The Biscoff factory in Lembeke, Belgium,
where the first Lotus bakery opened in 1932

Shapes or Yoplait’s Peppa Pig yoghurt pots).

“It feels more authentic and organic
because it’s serving demand.”
The Biscoff boom now extends beyond
the brand itself, inspiring a host of
“caramelised biscuit” products that don’t
use the Biscoff name, avoiding the need
for costly licensing deals. Last summer
Yorkshire Tea launched teabags “with the
irresistible flavour of those crunchy
continental classics”. In January Weetabix
revealed a biscuit-flavoured version of its
Crispy Minis.
Yet Belgians are baffled by the
spectacular success of speculoos. “I was
on my book tour in San Francisco in 2023
and on Pier 39 there was this whole Biscoff
coffee shop,” says Regula Ysewijn, the
Belgian food writer and judge on Belgium’s
version of Bake Off. Her book of festive
baking recipes, Dark Rye and Honey Cake,
includes a traditional speculaas biscuit,
which is harder and spicier than Biscoff.
“I was, like, ‘Oh my God, how is this
possible?’ I mean, this is like your digestive
biscuit. Everyone has it in their cupboards,
but it’s not special.”
Ysewijn thinks that the biscuit has just
the right level of flavour to be interesting
yet universally appealing. “I think its
strength is that it’s so incredibly simple,
and sometimes simple is best,” she says.
That and all the sugar. Aware of growing
scrutiny triggered by an obesity crisis,
a decade ago Lotus began investing in
products perceived to be healthier. It has
largely focused on small British brands and
now owns Kiddylicious, a baby food brand;
Bear, whose Yoyos — dried fruit coils —
teamed up with the Boones in 1974 — now have become a lunchbox staple; and
has more than 3,000 employees and 12
production sites around the world making
dozens of other baked goods. Two plants
ONLY FIVE Natural Balance Foods, which makes Nakd
and Trek snack bars. Where these contain
sugar, it is largely from the fruit in them.
are dedicated to Biscoff — one opened in
North Carolina in the US in 2019 — and PEOPLE AT Jan Jr’s dough raids may be a distant
memory, but he still eats at least one Biscoff
a third is due to be fired up in Thailand in
2026. The company’s share price has
quadrupled in the past five years.
LOTUS KNOW every day. “In Belgium we dip them into
coffee or milk, but you have to be careful
because even two seconds is too long,”
TikTok virality has been a surprise, says
Boone, who claims to be one of five people
at Lotus who know the precise Biscoff
THE PRECISE he says. (I’ve tested this and he’s right
— they dissolve almost immediately.) His
grandfather died long before his biscuit
recipe. But growth has been no accident.
The executive, who studied economics and
worked for accounting and pharmaceutical
RECIPE took off, but Matthieu is still around and
calls the current CEO at least once a week.
“The first question is always, ‘How are sales
firms before returning to the family this week?’” Boone says. “He’s still
business in 2005, launched the expansion very passionate.”
strategy when he became CEO. Initially he Jägermeister and Flying Goose Sriracha Boone is confident that Biscoff ’s
planned to “internationalise” all of Lotus’s — has benefited from an air of authenticity. relatively low price and broad
products, which were sold largely in “It has helped build up this huge brand appeal mean it will be more than
northern Europe, but then he decided to loyalty on social media that has given Lotus a fad — he’s not worried about
PREVIOUS PAGES: ALAMY

focus on Biscoff. the power to push out into new areas,” says his Biscoff empire crumbling. In
As well as shrewd corporate manoeuvring Ben Roberts at License Global, which a soft Flemish accent, he says he’s
and an investment in marketing, Biscoff analyses brand licensing and partnerships more concerned about building
— like other regional delicacies that have — a growing trend in food (examples factories fast enough: “We
achieved unlikely global success, including include Heinz’s Frozen-themed Pasta want to conquer the world.” n
30 • The Sunday Times Magazine
A trusted assistant.
An A-list fixer.
A “ketamine queen”.
Two doctors.
A $55,000 drugs bill.
And a lethal injection.
The Hollywood death
of Matthew Perry
By Keiran Southern

The Sunday Times Magazine • 31

 city’s wealthiest postcodes. Bette Davis
shares a sarcophagus here with her mother

More
The cast of Friends make their
and sister. Liberace’s grave is marked with debut in 1995; from left, Matt
a doodle of a piano, while Stan Laurel has LeBlanc, Lisa Kudrow, Courteney

PREVIOUS PAGE: BRIAN BOWEN SMITH / AUGUST. THESE PAGES: EYEVINE, MATTHEW PERRY / INSTAGRAM, COLEMAN RAYNER, GOFF PHOTOS
a modest plot, thousands of miles from his Cox, David Schwimmer, Jennifer
birthplace of Ulverston in Cumbria. Aniston and Matthew Perry

than a In November 2023 another star was laid

to rest at Forest Lawn. Less than a week
after his death from what an autopsy report
described as “the acute effects of ketamine”, On the morning of Perry’s death Iwamasa

century Matthew Perry’s loved ones gathered at

a church in the cemetery to say their final
goodbyes. The 54-year-old’s casket was
placed within the white walls of a corridor
had injected him with substantial quantities
of ketamine, a procedure he had been
performing for weeks despite having no
medical training. He had handed over

ago called the Sanctuary of Treasured Love, in

Forest Lawn’s Courts of Remembrance.
A mile from the studio where they filmed
the television show that made them world
thousands of dollars of Perry’s money to
drug dealers and allegedly crooked doctors
for ketamine — a powerful sedative and a
controlled substance in the US — while
famous and fabulously wealthy, Perry’s knowing his boss had fought a decades-long
Friends co-stars were together again. It was battle with addiction. It was Iwamasa who,
Dr Hubert Eaton, founder of Forest Lawn a reunion that had occurred only a handful on the afternoon of Saturday, October 28,
Memorial-Parks, lamented that cemeteries of times since the era-defining sitcom aired 2023, found Perry floating face down in the
had become “unsightly stoneyards full of its last episode in 2004. Jennifer Aniston, hot tub at his home in the Pacific Palisades
inartistic symbols and depressing customs”. Courteney Cox, Lisa Kudrow, David overlooking the ocean.
He vowed that his would be places of Schwimmer and Matt LeBlanc joined Perry’s Iwamasa’s secret would not be kept
beauty resembling “God’s garden”. The parents, siblings, management team and indefinitely. In August last year he was one
results of Eaton’s vision are dotted around childhood friends at the private ceremony. of five people charged in relation to Perry’s
southern California — filled with gleaming Among them was a man who was not death. He and two others — Erik Fleming,
chapels and statues around well-kept lawns. famous — at the time, at least. Kenneth 55, a former film director turned Hollywood
Forest Lawn Hollywood Hills is no Iwamasa was Perry’s live-in assistant and fixer, and a doctor, Mark Chavez, 54,
exception. The vast park on the slopes of he appeared just as devastated as they admitted conspiracy to distribute ketamine.
the Santa Monica Mountains might have were. His grief may have been genuine but The two defendants who are protesting
as many celebrities per acre as some of the the 60-year-old was also hiding a secret. their innocence — Dr Salvador Plasencia,

32 • The Sunday Times Magazine

 Almighty: “God, you can do whatever you
“When I’m carrying weight, it’s alcohol; want to me. Just please make me famous.”
His prayer had a Faustian twist. Friends
when I’m skinny, it’s pills. When I have premiered in September 1994 and was an
instant hit, making Perry and his co-stars
a goatee, it’s lots of pills,” Perry wrote superstars. Yet throughout his adult life
Perry was crippled by an overwhelming
addiction, destroying his body with alcohol
and prescription painkillers before he
43, and Jasveen Sangha, 41, an alleged drug “THIS DISEASE” eventually moved on to ketamine.
dealer to the stars — are due to go before The backyard of 18038 Blue Sail Drive in the In his 2022 memoir, Friends, Lovers and
a jury in August, accused of distributing Pacific Palisades offered some of the finest the Big Terrible Thing, the author wrote of
ketamine among other charges. The views in southern California. Perry bought downing bottles of vodka and filming the
indictment alleges that Sangha’s distribution the four-bedroom, mid-century property in sitcom through debilitating hangovers.
of ketamine caused Perry’s death. the exclusive neighbourhood of Los Angeles Then there were the pills. At his worst he
The case has pulled back the curtain for $6 million in 2020. From the deck a was taking 55 tablets of the powerful opioid
on the shady networks that prey on the viewer could watch surfers in the waves Vicodin each day, a Herculean logistical
vulnerabilities of the rich and famous. below. Perry valued the seclusion. It was challenge that involved lying to multiple
Sangha is alleged to be a prominent figure more peaceful than touristy Santa Monica, doctors to get hold of the drugs.
in the Hollywood underworld, to whom a 20-minute drive down the Pacific Coast Perry’s weight fluctuated between
Los Angeles prosecutors referred in the Highway, and less flashy than Malibu, seasons and he could tell by his appearance
indictment as “the Ketamine Queen”. A dual a short drive in the other direction. The on Friends which substance he was abusing
British and American citizen, who was born house survived the recent wildfires. at the time. “When I’m carrying weight, it’s
in Britain and carries a British passport, she Handsome and funny, Perry was earning alcohol; when I’m skinny, it’s pills. When
is alleged to have been a go-to dealer for more than $1 million an episode at the peak I have a goatee, it’s lots of pills,” he wrote.
high-profile clients, renowned not only for of Friends’ popularity, playing Chandler He detailed how he nearly died in 2018 after
the quality of her product but for her Bing, a wisecracking data analyst who used his colon burst due to his substance abuse.
discretion. Sangha is in jail awaiting the trial. humour to mask his insecurities. He found In 2022, after more than a dozen stints in
In the immediate aftermath of Perry’s inspiration for the role just by looking in rehab and spending $9 million to get clean,
death, those who saw him in his final weeks the mirror. About three weeks before he Perry revealed his anger at the price he had
said he had been in good spirits and sober. had auditioned for Friends, he had dropped paid for success. “It’s not fair that I had to
Then, after a coroner revealed drugs had to his knees in his tiny apartment near go through this disease while the other five
been involved, silence took hold. Some of Sunset Boulevard and appealed to the didn’t,” he told the Canadian Broadcasting
those closest to Perry, however, cannot Corporation, choking back tears. “They got
leave certain things unsaid. His best friend, everything that I got. But I had to fight this
Chris Murray, 54, a successful Canadian thing and still have to fight this thing.”
property developer based in London, places He was painfully lonely. He dated a series
much of the blame on the entertainment of beautiful women yet, haunted by a fear of
industry machine, and over Zoom unleashed abandonment, never married. His previous
his anger to me at those he feels let down partners include the model and actress
the actor. More than a year after his death, Yasmine Bleeth and Julia Roberts, with
as Perry’s final resting place lies without a whom he broke up in 1996 after fearing she
nameplate in Los Angeles, Murray wonders would leave him. “Why would she not?” ➤
if the actor will ever be free of Hollywood.
Meanwhile, Perry’s half-sister, Caitlin
Morrison, 43, has dedicated herself to
ensuring his legacy is one of hope rather
than despair. She lives in the town of Barrie,
Ontario, and is executive director of the
Matthew Perry Foundation of Canada.
“I think about him every day,” she tells me.

One of Perry’s last Instagram posts

from the hot tub in October 2023;
his home in the Pacific Palisades;
and his burial plot at the Forest
Lawn Hollywood Hills cemetery

The Sunday Times Magazine • 33

 With Johnny Depp in New York, 1987;
a final road trip in France with the
brothers Chris, left, and Brian Murray,
2023. Below: Perry, centre, as a junior
tennis player in Canada in the 1980s

he wrote in his book. “I was broken, bent,

unlovable.” Perry watched Roberts win the
best actress Oscar for Erin Brockovich in
2001 while detoxing at a rehab facility. He
provoked laughter in the room by joking at
the television, “I’ll take you back.” He was
engaged to the literary manager Molly
Hurwitz in November 2020 but ended
the relationship the following June.
When the cast of Friends reunited for
a TV special in 2021, Perry’s appearance
alarmed fans. He was sober at the time
but his speech was slurred. His death two
years later came after he had again relapsed.
Perry became addicted to ketamine after
receiving it intravenously in a clinical
setting for anxiety and depression. He went
on to seek it out illegally. He died alone
having been injected with ketamine by
someone he paid to live with him.

“I FELT FOR THE GUY” “Could she be any hotter?” He called it the The summer before his death he joined the
Perry was born in 1969 in Williamstown, Murray-Perry cadence. brothers on a trip to France, where they
Massachusetts, to John Bennett Perry, an The night of that first drink does not stick indulged in their shared love of tennis,
American singer and aspiring actor, now 84, in Chris’s mind, instead fading into a haze attending the French Open in Paris before
and Suzanne Langford, a Canadian beauty of general teenage high jinks, but for Perry heading to the Riviera. Perry’s assistant,
queen, now 81. His parents split up when he it was seminal. “For the first time in my life, Kenneth Iwamasa, was also there.
was nine months old — their last trip as a nothing bothered me,” Perry later recalled “That prick,” Chris says in disgust. At the
family unit was a five-and-a-half-hour drive of lying on the grass in his backyard having time of his death Perry had been considering
to the Canadian border. The elder Perry drunk a bottle of white wine. The Murrays moving back to Ottawa, where he had spent
dropped off his wife and son before leaving had thrown up, according to Perry’s telling, his final Christmas. He’d even taken virtual
them to pursue a career in Hollywood. while he was “complete, at peace. I had tours of homes in the Canadian capital —
Langford became famous in Canada as never been happier than in that moment.” to the delight of Chris, who had pleaded
the press secretary to Pierre Trudeau, the Aged 15 Perry joined his father in Los with him for years to leave Los Angeles.
country’s debonair prime minister. Perry Angeles, breaking his mother’s heart in Chris was among the speakers at Perry’s
claimed to have beaten up his son, Justin the process. Langford had married Keith funeral. The following day the brothers
Trudeau, while they attended an exclusive Morrison, a correspondent for Dateline went to his house in the Pacific Palisades
primary school together. “I’m not bragging NBC, a weekly news show. They had started because “we were concerned about Kenny”.
about this,” he said on a chat show in 2017. a family of their own and Perry felt left out. “They were really close,” Murray says of
“It was terrible, I was a stupid kid.” The Murrays remained Perry’s closest Iwamasa and Perry. He believed the live-in
Perry described feeling abandoned during friends. The actor was godfather to Chris assistant to be “odd” but had no idea the
a childhood mostly spent in Ottawa, where Murray’s 21-year-old daughter when he died. role he had played in Perry’s death. “I felt
he was a promising tennis player. There
were already signs of the problems to
come. His first drink of alcohol was at 14
when hanging out with his best friends,
Murray had no idea of the role Iwamasa
the brothers Chris and Brian Murray. They
had met at school in Ottawa and bonded
played in Perry’s death. “Matthew
over their shared sense of humour. It was
with the Murrays that Perry developed
would say, ‘He’s one of the good guys’”
Chandler’s distinctive way of speaking —

34 • The Sunday Times Magazine

 for the guy, about what he was going to do
afterwards,” Chris says. “Obviously, he was
out of a job. I was caring because Matthew
would say, ‘He’s one of the good guys.’ If
I had any f***ing idea he was slipping him
stuff … I just didn’t.”

“HOW MUCH WILL THIS MORON PAY?”

In August last year federal prosecutors in
Los Angeles unsealed an indictment that
reverberated around Hollywood. Five people
had been charged with drug offences in
relation to Perry’s death. Prosecutors told
a story of a vulnerable addict being preyed
upon by people supposed to help him.
Iwamasa, a short, bespectacled man with
wispy grey hair, was a veteran showbusiness
assistant originally from Michigan. His
LinkedIn page said he had worked for Perry
for 25 years and boasted: “I am discreet,
loyal and honor absolute confidentiality.”
Among his responsibilities was
co-ordinating Perry’s medical appointments
and ensuring he took his legally prescribed
medicine — not including ketamine.
Perry had undergone legitimate ketamine
therapy to treat his depression and anxiety,
receiving intravenous doses of the drug
at a local clinic overseen by doctors.
However, according to prosecutors he
became addicted to the drug and asked for
an increased dosage — a request that was
denied. The medical examiner’s report
sheds further light on Perry’s treatment.
A witness whose name is redacted told
investigators that Perry’s previous doctor
had been giving him ketamine as often as
every other day, but his new physician of six
months believed his depression was “fine”,
so he “did not need more treatments”. His live in California, where she graduated at
last known clinically administered dose of Perry in 2023 with his assistant Calabasas High School before studying at
ketamine was a week and a half before his Kenneth Iwamasa, who pleaded the University of California, Irvine. Sangha
death. Unable to go without the drug, guilty to supplying the actor briefly returned to Britain in 2010 to study
Perry turned to illegitimate means. with ketamine. Right, from top: for an MBA at the Hult International
It is alleged that in September 2023 Erik Fleming, Dr Mark Chavez Business School in London before
Iwamasa was asked by Perry to help him and Dr Salvador Plasencia returning to Los Angeles.
obtain ketamine and did so through Dr From her home in north Hollywood
Plasencia — aged 42 at the time the charges she curated art shows in LA and attended
were unveiled — who operated a clinic in parties around the world where she was
Calabasas. Plasencia, it is alleged, sourced adverse reaction to the drug, leading pictured with celebrities including
the drug from Dr Chavez, who had Plasencia to allegedly remark, “Let’s not do Charlie Sheen and DJ Khaled. For her 40th
previously run a ketamine clinic. that again.” Despite the huge sums being birthday in 2023 she celebrated with a lavish
“I wonder how much this moron will pay,” spent, Perry’s growing addiction meant party at Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, a bar at the
GETTY IMAGES, MATTHEW PERRY / INSTAGRAM, BACKGRID, COLEMAN RAYNER

Plasencia allegedly texted Chavez, referring Iwamasa sought another illicit source. boutique Line Hotel in the Koreatown
to Perry. The answer was a lot. Prosecutors neighbourhood that combines disco with a
say Iwamasa met Plasencia at least seven THE “KETAMINE QUEEN” Gatsby-era theme. She dressed in a feathery
times between September 30 and October Jasveen Sangha’s life was, according to her ensemble featuring a cane and cowboy-style
28, paying him $55,000 of Perry’s money Instagram page, the sort of glamorous hat. In November 2023, a few weeks after
for ketamine in liquid and lozenge form. existence that outsiders might believe is Perry was found dead, Sangha was drinking
Sometimes, Perry appeared to be so commonplace in southern California. The tea at a five-star hotel in Tokyo. From her
desperate for his next fix that he would join 41-year-old was regularly pictured draped room she had views of Mount Fuji and
his assistant to obtain the drugs. Iwamasa in designer clothing from high-end brands: posed in a flowery kimono.
drove him to a public car park near an Gucci top, Fendi jacket, Louis Vuitton Prosecutors say that her jet-setting
aquarium in Long Beach on October 10 shoes. She had grown up in the UK, born lifestyle was funded by a “drug-selling
where they met Plasencia, who climbed in Essex in 1983. Her mother, Nilem, was emporium” and Sangha had another
into the back seat with Perry and injected from Ilford, east London, the daughter of a identity, that of the “Ketamine Queen”.
him with a shot of ketamine. Plasencia hosiery wholesaler. Sangha was the product Sangha, it is alleged, was running a “stash
allegedly instructed Iwamasa how to inject of Nilem’s first marriage of three — her house” where she dealt drugs to the rich
Perry. On one occasion Perry suffered an father was a doctor. Nilem took Sangha to and famous, earning a reputation among ➤

The Sunday Times Magazine • 35

the Hollywood elite as a trusted supplier of
methamphetamine, psilocybin mushrooms,
cocaine and prescription drugs.
The link between Perry and the “Ketamine
Queen” is alleged to be Erik Fleming,
a former film-maker who directed the 1999
children’s comedy My Brother the Pig,
featuring a young Scarlett Johansson.
Fleming had a promising career but at
some point it unravelled and he became
a middleman for drug dealers.
Fleming had heard through a mutual
friend that Perry was looking for ketamine
and got in touch on October 4, 2023,
according to his plea agreement. On October
10 Iwamasa was looking for additional
sources of the drug to feed his boss’s
spiralling addiction. “She only deal[s] with
high end and celebs,” Fleming allegedly
texted Iwamasa on October 11. “If it were
not great stuff she’d lose her business.”
Prices were discussed over text, as well
as a $1,000 brokering fee for Fleming.
He promised Iwamasa that Sangha could
deliver whatever was wanted and replied:
“As of now she said she can fill any order.”
Iwamasa paid Fleming $6,000 for 25 vials
of ketamine. Five days before Perry died,
Fleming was at the actor’s house and picked
up another $6,000. He delivered 25 vials
to Perry’s Palisades home at about 10.52pm
on October 24. This is the ketamine that
prosecutors allege killed Perry.

“SHOOT ME UP WITH A BIG ONE”

At about 8.30am on October 28, 2023, Jasveen Sangha, dubbed the “Ketamine
Perry asked Iwamasa to inject him with Queen” to A-listers, is awaiting trial
a dose of ketamine. At about 11am, Perry and has pleaded not guilty. Right:
played pickleball at his local country club. drugs uncovered at her property
He had become a keen player of the racket
sport and according to his coach was
using it to help his recovery.
He returned home by 12.45pm and asked medical examiner’s report states that there
Iwamasa to administer more ketamine was no illegal drug paraphernalia found at
while he watched a movie, according to the house, only prescribed medicine,
the assistant’s plea agreement. About 40 over-the-counter products, nicotine vapes
minutes later Perry asked Iwamasa to and lollipops. Used ashtrays were placed
prepare the hot tub and told him to “shoot around the property. Perry had recently
me up with a big one”. The assistant filled been trying to give up smoking. evidence. Sangha is said to have updated
a syringe and injected Perry while he was Perry’s body was placed on a stretcher and the settings on her app to automatically
“in or near” the heated portion of his pool. loaded into a white coroner’s van after 1am wipe messages with Fleming and instructed
Perry would spend his evenings there, a few on Sunday, October 29. The vehicle drove him to “delete all our messages”. “Yes,”
feet from a red-lighted “bat signal” he had slowly from his home down a hill to a crowd Fleming replied, according to a screenshot
installed on the pool floor. He had an of photographers and television reporters included in charging documents.
enduring fascination with Batman and had waiting in the dark behind a yellow police They continued to communicate,
a haul of Caped Crusader memorabilia. cordon. Camera flashes illuminated the however. “Please call … Got more info and
After injecting the third dose of ketamine, street. After Perry’s body left the scene his want to bounce ideas off you,” Fleming
Iwamasa left to run errands. He returned mother, Suzanne, followed with her wrote on October 30. “I’m 90% sure
at 4pm to find Perry face down in the pool, husband, Morrison, at the wheel of a white everyone is protected. I never dealt with
according to the medical examiner’s report. Tesla. Suzanne was in the passenger seat, [Perry]. Only his Assistant. So the Assistant
After lifting him onto the steps, he called her head bowed. was the enabler. Also they are doing a 3
paramedics. The emergency services month tox screening … Does K stay in your
arrived within minutes and pulled Perry “DELETE ALL OUR MESSAGES” system or is it immediately flushed out[?]”
onto the grass, where he was pronounced When the news of Perry’s death broke on Sangha was arrested on drugs charges
dead at 4.17pm. the evening of October 28, the network of in March last year and released on bail.
In the immediate aftermath, Iwamasa dealers who supplied the drugs immediately However, in August federal prosecutors
cleared away the incriminating evidence tried to cover their tracks, it is alleged. brought a new indictment accusing her
including empty ketamine bottles and Prosecutors say Fleming used the Signal of being implicated in Perry’s death and
syringes, according to court records. The encrypted messaging app to discuss deleting her bail was revoked ahead of a trial.

36 • The Sunday Times Magazine

 Sangha has pleaded not guilty to various
charges, including distribution of ketamine
resulting in death. She is alleged to have
Sangha’s jet-setting lifestyle was allegedly
been dealing drugs for years and was linked
to another ketamine-related death in 2019.
funded by a “drug-selling emporium” —
Her mother secured the $100,000 bond
following her initial arrest but could not
a “stash house” catering to rich clients
be contacted for comment. Sangha, whose
lawyer has also been contacted, was last
seen publicly during a court appearance in Morrison is driven by grief for her here, only a few wilted flowers. It did not
August. A sketch artist showed her shackled, half-brother. Perry was more than a decade remain under wraps for long, however,
wearing a bright green Nirvana sweatshirt in her senior and she idolised him as a child, and the Hollywood news website TMZ
place of the designer clothes she was used to. recalling sitting starry-eyed while watching reported the location shortly after the
him perform at the family home in Canada. funeral. Some fans had stuck Batman
A LEGACY “I think about him every day,” Morrison stickers on the wall as a tribute to Perry’s
Perry had wanted to spend the rest of his says. “I think everyone who knew him does. “Mattman” persona, which have since been
life helping other addicts, especially those He was brilliant and extraordinary, a central removed. The subdued nature of the plot
without his financial means. “The best part of everybody’s life. I think about him in does not sit well with Chris Murray. He was
thing about me, bar none, is that if terms of what he would do in every situation also angered by the memorial service.
somebody comes to me and says, ‘I can’t when it comes to decisions that are being “I’m not saying have a big funeral, at least
stop drinking, can you help me?’ I can say made about the organisation. Because I am have a religious funeral,” he says. “Have
yes and follow up and do it,” he told a fuelled by a desire to continue the work he something that’s not Hollywood. Have
podcast in 2022. “When I die, I don’t want was doing in the way he would do it, and then something that has spiritual meaning. Have
Friends to be the first thing that’s mentioned. spare other people from all the devastation something where he’s laid to rest, where
I want that to be the first thing that’s that comes with losing someone.” he has a tombstone or something nice that
mentioned. And I’m gonna live the rest you can visit, rather than what looks like a
of my life proving that.” A GRAVE WITH NO NAME drawer at a morgue, in some faithless and
Days after he was found dead, a foundation The Courts of Remembrance at Forest faceless resting place.” The presence of
was established in his name. The Matthew Lawn is one of the most visited sites at Iwamasa at the funeral rubbed salt into
Perry Foundation, based in Los Angeles, the cemetery, where towering stone walls the wounds. Murray would like to bring
was “the realisation of Matthew’s enduring surround lawned courtyards. It is here that Perry to Canada, posthumously saving him
commitment to helping others struggling Bette Davis is buried, a short walk from from an industry he views as predatory.
with the disease of addiction”, a statement Liberace and Rod Steiger. In one courtyard Sangha and Plasencia were due to stand
announcing its creation read. It is run by Debbie Reynolds and Carrie Fisher, the trial in downtown Los Angeles next month.
Doug Chapin, Perry’s former manager, and mother and daughter actresses who died However, their lawyers asked for more time
Lisa Kasteler-Calio, his former publicist. within a day of each other in 2016, are laid to prepare their defence and a judge agreed,
Almost a year after the actor’s death, to rest in a giant sarcophagus. pushing the joint trial to August 19. Iwamasa
another Matthew Perry Foundation was set Around the corner, beneath the crypts is scheduled to be sentenced in May,
up, based in Canada, where he grew up, and of an avian biologist and a medical scientist, Chavez and Fleming in April. Legal experts
run by his family and close friends. Kudrow, lies the unmarked final resting place of suggest the defendants may argue that the
Perry’s Friends co-star, is an ambassador, Matthew Perry. There is no nameplate case is an accidental death for which they
as is the actor Hank Azaria, known for to signify that one of the most famous are not directly responsible. They might
voicing characters on The Simpsons, and television stars of all time is laid to rest argue Perry was responsible for the drugs
the Friends co-creator David Crane. he took and so effectively caused his own
The actor’s loved ones wanted to death. The actor spent a lifetime fighting an
continue his work with treatment and the A youthful Perry with his addiction he could not control. “Just
organisation is run by Caitlin Morrison, half-sister, Caitlin Morrison, because it’s a tragedy doesn’t mean it’s
Perry’s half-sister, the daughter of Suzanne who has set up a foundation in criminal,” Mark Geragos, whose firm is
Langford and Keith Morrison. Speaking his name to combat addiction representing Sangha, said last year.
over Zoom from Barrie, she describes the That outcome is intolerable for Murray.
foundation’s approach as “on the ground”, “Who’s got Matt’s back?” he asks n
sending direct help to addicts who often find
themselves struggling alone after treatment.
The foundation will support an individual
for years, with everything from housing costs
to counselling and help finding employment.
The first Matthew Perry House will be
built in Ottawa and is due to open in 2027.
THE MEGA AGENCY, MATTHEWPERRYFOUNDATION.CA

A community residence for post-treatment,

it will consist of several apartment buildings
and a main centre connecting them. The
property will serve as a one-stop shop for
those in recovery, including mental health
treatment and job support. The foundation
has another ambitious goal: Morrison is
looking for a mid-sized Canadian town of
about 50,000 people, where they will offer
help to every single addict with services
similar to the Matthew Perry House.

The Sunday Times Magazine • 37

FAMILY THRILLS IN DUBAI
From waterparks and hot air balloons to beach clubs, skydiving and even a secret
proposal: how three generations of a family enjoyed the trip of a lifetime
ulti-generation holidays are a popular way safe and the people are incredibly friendly,” she says.

M
Chute the breeze:
to see the world, with Abta saying that Aquaventure World The couple, who run an electrical business, are
70 per cent of families in the UK either – set between Atlantis enthusiastic about the city’s irresistible mix of
have been on or are planning a break that The Royal and culture, adventure and sunshine.
includes parents, grandparents and children. And Atlantis The Palm – is “There’s always something new to do,” says Lyn.
it’s no surprise when there are so many benefits the place to cool off “On our most recent trip we went to an ultra-luxe
to booking an escape with extended family. resort, Atlantis The Royal, to see the water
As well as the chance to save money on fountains and eat at the restaurants. You can book a
accommodation, travel and childcare, it’s a unique desert safari, a dune buggy tour or a hot air balloon
opportunity to make the most of your time together ride to see Dubai from a different perspective.
and create cherished memories for everyone. “Walking around the Old Town is a lovely
One of the destinations regularly topping the change of pace – we always enjoy taking in the
“3G” (three-generation) holiday list is Dubai. With atmosphere of the souks. Although I do enjoy the
regular direct flights from the UK taking just under luxury aspects, there are so many other sides to
seven hours and only a four-hour time difference the city. We didn’t hesitate to go back as a family.”
(down to a three-hour difference during British With Lyn and Michael’s son Louis and his
Summer Time), it’s a manageable journey for all ages. fiancée Emma Keir also regular visitors to Dubai,
And Dubai is a welcoming, easy-to-explore when grandson Archie arrived, they began
city, with activities and accommodation options planning a family trip to remember.
to suit every budget, from theme parks like “Dubai is very popular with families, so we
Legoland Dubai and Motiongate Dubai to desert were well catered for,” says Lyn. “There are
trails, Michelin-starred restaurants, pristine children’s pools everywhere, lots of lifeguards,
beaches and the lively souks of Old Dubai. and kids’ clubs in abundance. It’s easy to book
Grandmother Lyn Martin, 61, along with an Uber with a child seat, and the hotels are very
husband Michael, 63, has visited Dubai more than welcoming, with food to suit everyone.
a dozen times. “There’s plenty to do, it feels very “There’s all sorts of accommodation too. When
 SPONSORED CONTENT

the five of us went together, we stayed

at Le Royal Méridien, which is fairly
relaxed and family-orientated.
“It’s one of the oldest beach hotels
in Dubai, and within walking distance
of most of the places we like to visit,
like the marina and The Walk at
Jumeirah Beach Residence.”
Grandparents love… With Louis and Emma, both 30,
dining at Row on 45 and ten-month-old Archie in tow,
The eponymous star of hit TV Lyn and Michael were happy to add
series Jason Atherton’s Dubai some family-friendly activities to
Dishes serves up superb fine their usual holiday itinerary.
dining and incredible views “We’d pick Archie up each morning
of Palm Jumeirah at his latest so Louis and Emma could have a
Michelin-starred restaurant. lie-in, then meet up at breakfast to
decide what we were doing for the
day,” Lyn explains.
“During our seven-night stay we packed in
a trip to the Dubai Miracle Garden, which has
amazing sculptures made out of flowers, took
Archie on the little train in the town square and

Parents love…
beach clubs
Each is a social scene and
‘Michael booked a
beach bliss rolled into one,
from hip DJ bars to laid-back
chill zones. A day pass costs
skydive, so while we
from around AED120pp (£26).
Check out ultra-chic White played by the pool he
Beach Club at Atlantis.
was jumping out of
a plane at 13,000ft’ views from the infinity pool and the music – it’s
one of our favourite spots in Dubai.”
Since their trip, Lyn and Michael have returned
to the city alone – but after the success of their
spent an evening at Emirates Golf Club playing family break, they’re hoping to plan another
Kids love… Topgolf. We visited the Aquaventure Waterpark, 3G trip in the future. “I’d love to treat my older
theme parks which has a kids’ zone for little ones, a beach for son Charlie to a holiday there one day,” Lyn says.
There are so many: Wild Wadi relaxing and over a hundred waterslides. “His children are a bit older than Archie, and
Waterpark has speed slides, “I also got to spend lots of time on my own I think they’d love Dubai. It really is the ideal
a surf simulator and thrilling with Archie, which was lovely. Michael took place for a family holiday everyone can enjoy.”
wave pool; while Real Madrid the opportunity to book a skydive, so while we
World features more than 40 were playing by the pool, he was busy jumping
experiences and attractions.
out of a plane at 13,000ft.”
With Lyn and Michael on hand for babysitting
duties, Louis and Emma were also able to enjoy
some quality time together as a couple.
“Louis hired a Ferrari to take us out to the
desert so we could go dune buggying,” says
Emma. “Afterwards, as we headed out for dinner, Between the mountains, desert and sea, Dubai is the
The family love… I spotted a lit-up sign on the beach that said welcoming city where heritage meets vibrant innovation
discovering the desert ‘Marry Me’. Louis got down on one knee and and there’s always something new and exciting to discover.
Companies such as Platinum proposed – I was in total shock, but of course I said
Heritage and Sand Sherpa yes. Lyn and Michael were in on the surprise and With regular direct flights from Birmingham, Edinburgh,
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Dubai Desert Conservation able to celebrate our engagement together. more at visitdubai.com
Reserve to spot Arabian oryx “The next day, Louis and I headed to White
and gazelles in the dunes. Beach Club at Atlantis for some alone time. And enjoy the best holiday packages from Destinology
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TABLE TALK

Risotto remixed Charlie Hibbert’s panissa rice and beans

PLUS Perfectionism on a plate in Yorkshire ● Substitutes for the usual

red wine suspects ● Cup winners: breakfast teas ranked
The Sunday Times Magazine • 41
CHARL I E
HI BBE RT

here are so many

T
conflicting views on
what constitutes the
perfect risotto that it’s
tempting to reach for
a packet of the ready-
made stuff. But you’d
miss out on one of the
simplest pleasures of
the Italian kitchen, as
these three rice recipes
from the head chef of Thyme
hotel in the Cotswolds show.

Panissa rice and beans

Panissa is a Piedmontese
mountain dish — a cross
between a risotto and a stew,
so substantial you can literally the pan and gently crush with 5 Once the rice is tender, For the risotto
stand your spoon up in it. a wooden spoon. Cook for a add the tomato and bean mix • 1 small shallot, finely diced
further 5 min until thickened. and enough liquid to achieve • 2 garlic cloves, sliced
Ingredients the desired thickness. Beat • 15ml olive oil
(Serves 4) 2 If using dried beans, strain through the parmesan and • 1 litre chicken stock
For the borlotti beans them and add to the pot along butter, season and serve • A pinch of saffron, soaked in
• 1 tbsp olive oil with the rosemary. Cover with immediately. 1 tsp boiling water
• 1 onion, diced fresh water, ensuring there is • 400g arborio rice
• 1 tin of whole peeled an extra 2cm on top. Braise for Braised oxtail • 175ml white wine
tomatoes an hour or until soft, then set and saffron risotto • 80g parmesan
• 300g borlotti beans (soaked aside. If you are using tinned A twist on the classic Italian • 50g butter
overnight or tinned) beans, simply incorporate the dish osso buco, this is a • A handful of chopped parsley
• 2 rosemary sprigs beans along with their water hearty and tasty winter dish.
into the tomato mix and bring A delicate risotto base is 1 Begin with the oxtail. Heat
For the rice everything up to a simmer. topped with slow-cooked the oven to 150C fan/gas 3.
• 50g pancetta, diced oxtail and a rich sauce. Heat 1 tablespoon of olive oil
• 1 small onion, diced 3 Start the risotto by cooking in a large pot. Tip in the
• 2 celery sticks, diced the pancetta over a medium Ingredients vegetables, thyme and garlic,
• 1 head of fennel, thinly sliced heat until crisp. Add the (Serves 4) stirring regularly. Once
• 300g arborio rice vegetables and sweat them For the oxtail browned, remove to a plate.
• 175ml red wine, ideally for 5 min. Add the rice and stir • 2 tbsp olive oil, plus more Dress the oxtail with the other
barbaresco or barbera but for 2 min, coating the grains in to dress the oxtail tablespoon of olive oil, season,
any fruity red will do the fat before adding the wine. • 1 onion, chopped into and in the same pan cook the
• Extra chicken or vegetable large chunks oxtail over a medium heat until
stock (if you used tinned beans) 4 Once the wine has largely • 2 celery sticks, chopped into well coloured.
• 80g parmesan, grated evaporated, start adding the large chunks
• 50g butter broth from the cooked beans, • 2 carrots, chopped into 2 Return the vegetables to the
ladle by ladle, allowing the rice large chunks pan and add the wine. Use a
1 Start with the beans. Heat to absorb the liquid before • 1 small bunch of thyme wooden spoon to scrape any
the olive oil in a large pan over adding the next. If you used • 2 garlic cloves caramelised bits from the base.
a medium heat and add the tinned beans and there is not • 8 large oxtail pieces Allow the wine to reduce by
onion. Sweat for a few minutes enough liquid, you may need • 250ml red wine half, then add enough stock
until soft. Add the tomatoes to to use additional stock. • 1.5 litres beef stock to just cover the meat.

42 • The Sunday Times Magazine

 Tasted! The best
supermarket
BREAKFAST
TEABAGS

OUR
PICK

Luxury Gold
M&S, £3.40 for 80
A perfect brew! This is
a complex tea with lots
of different notes and a
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Tetley Original
Tesco, £3 for 80
A punchy cuppa that
holds its strength after
milk too, finishing with a
rounded mouthfeel. 5/5

Twinings English
Breakfast
Waitrose, £5 for 80
Strong tea fans will like
3 Cover the pan with tin Pumpkin, sage Roast for 20 min or until this first thing. It’s got a
foil and put in the oven for and mozzarella risotto cooked through. Set aside. big kick but the finish
2½ hours or until the meat A delicious and warming dish, is quite bitter. 4/5
is soft. Rest for 20 min, then combining sweet and nutty 2 For the topping, heat the
lift out the meat, strain, and pumpkin, creamy mozzarella vegetable oil in a frying pan Yorkshire Tea
discard the vegetables. Reduce and woody sage. over a medium heat and brown Sainsbury’s, £3.30
the liquid over a medium heat the hazelnuts, stirring all the for 80 Rounded and
to a thick, shiny glaze. Ingredients time. At the last second, throw smooth but lacks depth
(Serves 4) in the sage and cook for 1 min. and strength. 3/5
4 Next, prepare the risotto. For the pumpkin Finish with the chilli flakes and
LUKE J ALBERT FOR THE SUNDAY TIMES MAGAZINE. PROP STYLIST: VICTORIA TWYMAN. PORTRAIT: OLA O SMIT

Sweat the shallot and the • 400g pumpkin, cubed a pinch of salt and set aside. PG Tips Original
garlic in the olive oil over • 2 tbsp olive oil Ocado, £3 for 80
a medium heat for 5 min 3 To make the risotto, sweat This has an in-yer-face
until soft and translucent. For the topping the onion and the garlic in the sort of strength. It’s not
Separately, bring the stock • 25ml vegetable oil olive oil over a medium heat complex or rounded
to a simmer. Add the saffron • 50g hazelnuts, crushed for 5 min. Add the rice and stir — it’s just strong. 3/5
to the onion and garlic, stir, • 16 sage leaves for 2 min, coating the grains
and add the rice. Coat the rice • A pinch of chilli flakes with oil. Pour over the wine Clipper Classic
in the oil and cook for 2 min and allow it to evaporate. Everyday Tea
before adding the wine. For the risotto Tesco, £3.75 for 80
• 1 small onion, finely chopped 4 Separately, bring the stock There’s flavour and
5 Allow the wine to evaporate • 2 garlic cloves, sliced to a simmer and add it, ladle by punch here but this tea
then add the stock, ladle by • 1 tbsp olive oil ladle, until the rice is cooked is just a bit weak. 2/5
ladle, until the rice is tender. • 300g arborio rice through. Add the pumpkin and
Beat through the parmesan • 175ml white wine mozzarella and beat through Finest English Breakfast
and butter, taste and season. • 750ml vegetable stock the risotto, then beat through Tesco, £2.75 for 100
• 150g ball of mozzarella the parmesan and the butter. No amount of brewing
6 Spoon the risotto onto the • 60g parmesan Season and serve with the will coax any kind of
plates followed by a couple of • 50g butter hazelnuts and sage on top n strength out of it. The
pieces of oxtail and a spoonful flavour is shallow and
of the oxtail liquor. Scatter 1 Heat the oven to 180C fan/ Charlie Hibbert is the chef one-dimensional. 1/5
over the chopped parsley gas 6. Season the pumpkin director of Thyme;
and serve immediately. and dress with the olive oil. thyme.co.uk Hannah Evans
 R E S T A U R A N T S Charlotte Ivers l

Seventeen courses — and

every one a winner

MÝSE
NORTH YORKSHIRE

S
ome great restaurants,
I claimed a few weeks
ago, are great because
they make you feel as
if you are at the centre
of the world, at the
most exciting place
in the city. Well, some
great restaurants are
great for the exact
opposite reason.
The city is for socialites, chefs
who care about seeing and being
seen. The countryside is for
obsessives: nerds who hole up
for years doing a thousand
unnatural things to a beetroot,
until they have isolated the very
essence of the beetroot’s soul.
Their restaurants are quiet
shrines to food. Getting there
is a pilgrimage and you have
to cough up a lot in alms.
It’s immediately clear that
You don’t need to know what’s **************************************
Mýse is one of those places good. It’s all good. Of course it is THE DAMAGE
**************************************
when we arrive on a dark
winter’s evening, the fog so — we’re dealing with obsessives Selection from 17-course
dinner tasting menu (£145pp)
thick we can’t see our hands.
n Charcoal pie with raw
We are in Hovingham, deepest on the peasantry, benevolently There is no buzz. Just quiet roe deer and smoked caviar
old North Yorkshire. Nudging pitying those forced to serve up reverence towards the food. n Braised ox cheek in Yorkshire
up against Mýse — a little Michelin-starred grub in the Everything here has been pudding batter with cucumber
converted terraced house — is absence of an inherited estate. considered obsessively. The n Duck and walnut wine
the Hovingham estate, famed The owners, Joshua and exposed wood floors, the white, broth with liver crumpet
for its cricket pitch, the oldest Victoria Overington (chef and cream and beige colour palette, n Jerusalem artichoke ice
still in use in the country. sommelier respectively), used the driftwood on the tables. cream with birch sap syrup
Like many of the best to have a restaurant in York: The crockery was all made on n Granny Smith apple,
kombu and maple verjus
restaurants round here, Mýse Le Cochon Aveugle. By all the Jurassic Coast, where
n 2 x glasses Walgate Rosé £28
gets much of its produce from accounts it was cool, urban Victoria grew up.
nearby Castle Howard. Each — our waiter describes it as That’s why we are here, by the Subtotal £318
time a waiter mentions this — “funky”. Now they are in this way. I was on the Jurassic Coast Service charge (12.5%) £39.75
and they mention it a lot — I am quiet village instead. Inside, about a year ago speaking to a
**************************************
met by the irresistible image of all the chairs point subtly not man named Mark. Mark was
the lord of the manor emerging towards your dining partner one of those local councillors
Total (for two) £357.75
**************************************
to bestow the latest potato crop but towards the open kitchen. who secretly prop up the whole

44 • The Sunday Times Magazine

 country: on every committee,
involved in every community
group. Friendly, generous.
So I’m sure he would have
helped me out regardless of W I N E Will Lyons l

what came next. As we said

goodbye, he turned to me.
“Look, I’ve googled you. The
thing is, my daughter has this
Red grapes to widen
restaurant in Yorkshire …”
I’d only just got back from your horizons
Yorkshire. What if this woman’s
restaurant was no good? So I
wrote down “Mýse”, and within
a year of opening it had won a o you find yourself in a bit of a

D
2023 Found Marzemino Italy
Michelin star and appeared on wine rut? I know the feeling. It’s (12%) M&S, £7.50 Marzemino is
countless “best restaurants in all too easy when perusing the a red grape native to northeast
the UK” lists. Ah, OK. aisle or clicking on your monthly Italy. It’s medium-bodied, with
It’s obvious why when you order to fill your basket with those a good tang of redcurrant and
see the kitchen, where the first trusty favourites that we naturally cherry. Perfect with roast lamb.
courses are lined up in precise gravitate towards during the chilly
regiments. Tiny charcoal pies winter months: Argentinian 2023 Viña Elena Organic
filled with local roe venison and malbec, Australian shiraz, Chilean Monastrell Spain (14%) The
smoked caviar, served on top of cabernet, that hearty bordeaux Wine Society, £8.95 Known as
pine branches, smoking slightly you heard about in the autumn mourvèdre in France, bright,
on hot coals. Lollipops of braised and haven’t stopped drinking since … lively monastrell has notes of
ox cheek, coated in Yorkshire But wine rewards curiosity and it is the damson, dark cherry and prune.
pudding batter with fermented adventurous drinker who loves variety and
cucumber jelly; like a Big Mac tastes widely who gets the most pleasure. 2022 Viento de Invierno
with pickles, which matures in There’s really no excuse for our timidity Mencia Spain (12.5%) Co-op,
your mouth to something much — in this country our supermarkets and £9.50 A little like gamay, juicy
deeper and more subtle. wine merchants are brimming with offbeat mencia is the star of Spain’s
Wild duck broth — blissfully wines and lesser-known grape varieties. Bierzo region and makes for a
umami rich. Lobster custard Marks & Spencer’s Found range is a medium wine steeped in fruit.
with wild mushrooms; almost treasure trove of unusual, good-value
sweet, somehow light. Springy reds, such as its 2023 Found Refosco (£8) 2023 Alain Grignon Réserve
sourdough crumpet filled with from the Veneto in Italy. With its dark Vielles Vignes Carignan
duck liver and a furl of duck colour, herbaceous wild cherry and tangy France (12.5%) Majestic,
ham. A cleverly savoury-sweet fruitiness, it makes for an excellent £11.99 This old-vine carignan
Jerusalem artichoke ice cream lower-cost alternative to chianti. is unctuous, ripe and smooth,
with birch sap syrup from the The Loved & Found range from Waitrose bursting with berry flavour.
trees at Castle Howard. has been such a success it has expanded in
There are 17 courses, so I’m recent years to include all sorts of curiosities, 2023 Cristóbal 1492 Bonarda
ILLUSTRATION BY ALEX GREEN / FOLIO ART FOR THE SUNDAY TIMES MAGAZINE, JASON ALDEN, SANE SEVEN

having to rattle through. But such as the light and breezy 2023 Loved & Mendoza Argentina (13.5%)
you don’t need to know what’s Found Piquepoul Noir from the Languedoc Tanners, £12.40 Argentina’s
good. It’s all good. Of course it is (£8.99). This grape is usually seen as a other red grape after malbec,
— we’re dealing with the nerds blending partner in châteauneuf-du-pape, bonarda here delivers a supple,
here. Clever wine pairings too, but when bottled alone its light texture and mellow sip with lovely damson.
and excellent nonalcoholic aromas of red fruit make it an ideal partner
choices: an apple juice (Castle for roast chicken and other white meats. 2021 Esporão Reserva
Howard apples, naturally) Think of it as a different take on gamay. Portugal (14%) Tesco, £20
infused with smoke from oak Majestic has updated its off-the-beaten- This interesting blend from
chips, with a hint of seaweed. track selections to include Alentejo includes the alicante
Here’s the most telling detail. plenty of exciting wines from gouschet grape and is rich and
Every time you go to the countries such as Moldova spicy with herbaceous notes.
bathroom, someone has taken and beyond. Why not ditch
the loo paper and folded over the Californian pinot and head
the end into an elaborate bit of to Romania for the juicy, Bargain of the week
origami. Even by the standards silky 2022 Incanta
of fancy restaurants that’s Pinot Noir (£9.99). 2023 La Mia Strada
insane. Nobody was asking for Here are some Falanghina Italy (13%)
it but Mýse is doing it anyway, other less obvious Co-op, £8 Produced on
because everything has to be winter reds the hillsides around Naples,
perfect. Not for our sake but for perfect for this falanghina is a crisp, dry,
the chef ’s. If it wasn’t all perfect, expanding your refreshing, citrus-laced white.
what would be the point? n vinous horizons n

The Sunday Times Magazine • 45

 D R I V I N G Jeremy Clarksonl

Just the six stars for Lambo’s

(sort of ) hybrid supercar
ever forced to use electricity as assistance might even be seen flame from its exhausts on the
REVIEW a means of propulsion, it would
be the end of the world and we
by some of their fans as a boon.
It mirrors the drive systems
overrun. I have no idea what it
is, but I know what it’s for. To

LAMBORGHINI would shoot each other.

Since then, of course, he’s
in Formula 1, and when all is
said and done you do get
make small boys jump up and
down with excitement while

REVUELTO been left with no choice. New

Liberal Democrat regulations
mean cars that run on petrol
staccato pinpricks of electrical
power between gear changes.
But Lamborghini is different.
clutching their tinkles.
If you liken supercars to
theatre, Ferrari is Ibsen,
alone are no longer allowed. And Lamborghini is not involved in McLaren is Chekhov and
there’s no escape. Even low- Formula 1 because it has no Lamborghini is panto. It’s all
volume makers of supercars are time for staccato pinpricks of heavy make-up and shouting.
few years ago, at a being forced down the eco route power. Lambo doesn’t do I loved the Aventador. My

A
Sunday Times dinner, and it’s filling me with despair. pinpricks. It’s about artillery. It’s 200mph day with it at the Imola
I sat next to one of the In recent weeks I’ve tried not science or nerd-tech either. track in northern Italy, howling
bosses at hybrids from Ferrari and It just paints its cars purple and round with the brakes glowing
Lamborghini, who McLaren, which are very nice, would, given half a chance, orange in the evening light, is
told me, in a spittle- but you can never quite get it equip them with space lasers. one of the best I ever had. So I
speckled table- out of your head that they were This is why I’ve always was sad to hear it would be going
thumping rage, that if built this way because of Nick maintained that the Aventador out of production, and even
he was ever forced to Clegg. You can feel him in the was the best supercar of them sadder to hear its replacement
make an electric car, background, smirking. all. Let’s face facts. A car you would be a hybrid. A hybrid
he would shoot The thing is, McLaren and can’t really climb into that costs Lambo is wrong. It’s like Aled
himself. I felt sorry for the man. Ferrari are serious carmakers more than £300,000 is daft. Jones doing an acoustic version
So I made sympathetic noises who make serious cars. They And if you’re going to be daft, of Highway to Hell.
and we drank some wine and we focus hard on engineering and be very daft. The Aventador The new car was called the
agreed that if Lamborghini was lap times, so the electrical actually produced a strange blue Revuelto, which I thought was

46 • The Sunday Times Magazine

 Then the V12 burst into life. each of the front wheels and
another to start the 6.5-litre
God, it’s exciting. It’s like you’re V12. Er. So that’s just a starter
CAR CLINIC
motor then. No wonder my Our experts
in charge of a solar system Lambo friend hadn’t shot answer your
himself. He’d simply built a
hybrid that is basically no such questions
thing. So while Nick Clegg is in
there somewhere, he’s not
smirking. He’s harrumphing.
Excited by what I’d learnt,
I couldn’t wait to drive it and
happily, two days later, it was
warm enough. So you start it up
and, initially, you’re on electrical
power. In most hybrids there’s
enough to get you to work. In Q We are buying a new
the Revuelto it got me to my Nissan and intend to run it
gates. Then, with the roar of an into the ground. We want
angry god, the V12 burst into life. to have the paintwork and
God, it’s exciting. It’s like upholstery protected with
you’re in charge of a solar a treatment such as
system. And get this. There Supagard but have been
were no warning buzzes and quoted £500. Are there
sirens if I strayed over the speed comparable products
limit or momentarily crossed suitable for home
the white line. Or maybe there application? EP, Placeland
were but Lamborghini has A There is an ever-
made them so quiet only a dog increasing market in
Italian for revolting, and so for when the roads were ribbons of could hear them. That would be ceramic coatings and
nearly two years I refused to black ice, so I couldn’t actually a very Lambo thing to do. nanotechnology treatments
even think about it. But then drive it. Yes, it had four-wheel To drive? What can I tell you? for both exteriors and
Lambo sent one round for a drive, but the power unit I honestly don’t know where to interiors of cars. Personally,
week-long loan. And I had to chucks out nearly a thousand begin with the steering and the I’ve never bought a car
admit it definitely had presence. brake horsepower. And driving grip and the noise of that brand new, so haven’t got
There was a lot of styling. There with that kind of power on transversely mounted V12. It’s experience of the types of
was styling on the styling. It was sheet ice? That’d be like sharing all just mad. Absolutely mad. treatments available upon
busier to behold than the front your bath with a toaster. And even at sociable speeds purchase, but I have used
page of a Japanese newspaper. So rather than driving it, it’s still mad, which cheers you ceramic coatings on my
But somehow it worked. I read the bumf, and you don’t up no end. Even in London, in a classic cars and
My cleaning lady has never have to dig very deep to find out traffic jam, in the rain, it felt like motorcycles. And having
once commented on any car that while it is technically a I was being tickled. You giggle at forked out for some of the
that has ever come to my house. hybrid, the battery is like one of all the weird clonking noises as higher-end paintwork
There have been many bobby- those 9V jobs you get in a torch. you change gear and the judders treatments and spent a fair
dazzlers over the years and she’s You charge it using the sort of from the front tyres as you try few hours preparing the
ignored all of them. But she was cable you get with a child’s toy, to park. It’s made from all sorts paint and applying the
so stunned by the Revuelto, she in just six minutes. And so far as of exotic compounds but it feels products, I would say it’s a
insisted on sitting in it and I can tell the electrical motors like you’re in a steam train. worthwhile investment.
hearing what it sounded like. are only really used for That said, the interior is I can’t make commercial
It was delivered during that reversing. Lambo say there are beautifully finished and there’s endorsements but I’ve had
subzero cold snap in January three electric motors. One for absolutely no evidence it was good personal experience
made using switches and knobs with Autoglym and
from the Audi parts bin. My Gtechniq. But considering
The Clarksometer only gripe is Lamborghini has the cost of the products,
followed Ferrari and put all and the labour and
Lamborghini Revuelto the buttons you need on the expertise to properly apply
steering wheel. Which, because them, I don’t think you’d
it’s a steering wheel, means they save a great deal by going
1,160mm

move about. So nothing’s ever for a DIY solution — and

where you expect it to be. obviously you’d get no
I suppose I could also gripe guarantee whatsoever n
4,947mm 2,266mm at the price tag. But £421,595
suits the excessiveness of Greg Carter,
Engine 6499cc, V12, twin-turbo, petrol plus three electric motors everything else. This is a Spinal technical
Power 989bhp (combined) Torque 783 lb ft (combined) 0-62mph Tap car. It goes to eleven specialist, the AA
2.5sec Top speed 217mph Fuel Up to 23.8mpg CO2 276g/km everywhere. And so I’m going to
GETTY IMAGES

Weight 1,880kg Price £460,000 Release date On sale now do the same with its star rating. Send questions to carclinic@
The maximum I can award is sunday-times.co.uk
Jeremy’s rating five. So I’m giving it six n

The Sunday Times Magazine • 47

 F I TNE S S

Who’s got your back?

Back pain will come to most of us — so get future-proofing now, says Rosamund Dean

ack pain will affect “Work on endurance, not just

B
about 80 per cent of strength. Try a plank for 20-30
us, and for some it seconds and build up the
can be debilitating. amount of time you hold it
Almost a million gradually, as you get stronger.”
people in the UK are A brisk walk also counts as
out of work because of weight-bearing exercise and
back or neck pain, and will work your muscles and
the annual welfare bill get the blood flowing. Just
for people with back 10-15 minutes a day is enough
problems has tripled to make a difference.
in two decades to £1.4 billion.
The good news is that it’s not Pay attention to pain
an inevitable part of ageing. If you are suffering NHS
There is plenty that we can guidelines advise that you
do to future-proof our back manage pain with an anti-
muscles and spine. inflammatory such as ibuprofen
and stay as active as possible.
Make a move Your spine is strong, flexible
The first thing is to sit less and resilient: most back pain
and move more. If your work will improve without specific
requires you to sit at a desk for treatment within six weeks.
hours on end, “move as soon as If it persists for longer it’s
you start to feel uncomfortable,” worth seeing your GP to rule
advises Ruth Newsome, a spinal out something more serious
specialist physiotherapist at — very rarely it can be a sign
Sheffield Teaching Hospitals of a broken bone, an infection
NHS Trust. “Or if you’re totally says. “You just need a chair “Strengthening your muscles or some cancers. “But don’t
focused on desk work, create that feels comfortable, with helps support your back and panic,” Newsome says. “Back
a time to move at least every a back rest that you can ‘relax’ also improves bone density, pain is common and happens
hour. Natural breaks are good, into.” In fact, she says, buying which is essential for spinal to most people at some point
like getting a drink or going to a chair that claims to reduce health as we age.” in their lives.”
the toilet.” back pain may actually make Bodyweight exercises — Interestingly, for anyone who
Working from home? Take us complacent about being which require no equipment has spent their life being told to
advantage of the freedom. sedentary. Lumbar supports, — are simple and accessible to sit up straight, Newsome says
Alternate between your usual sold as a solution to back pain, everyone, so there’s no need for ramrod posture is not the whole
chair at a desk, standing at a can “make the back stiff and an expensive gym membership. story. “Everyone is different,
counter or sitting on a large achy, as they encourage people Cowan suggests a “dead bug”, so pay attention to what feels
cushion to work at a low table. to sit with a stiff, upright back,” where you lie on your back with comfortable to you.”
None of these is inherently Newsome adds. “If the back your arms extended towards
“better”, but moving between rest on a chair feels too far the ceiling and knees bent at 90 Stress less
them will prevent you being in away, a soft cushion can be degrees, then slowly lower your Don’t neglect your emotional
one position for too long. You helpful to lean back into.” right arm and left leg towards wellbeing as a factor. “Back
could also make it a policy to the floor while keeping your pain is multifactorial, with
stand up during calls. Shoulder Give me strength lower back pressed into the mat. psychological factors affecting
rolls and seated marching — “No matter your age or fitness Return your arms to the starting prognosis and recovery,”
raising one knee at a time under level, strength training two or position and repeat with your Newsome says. “Many
your desk — will help too. three times a week is one of left arm and right leg. are sceptical about stress
the most effective ways to Incorporate “functional” management tools such as
GETTY IMAGES

Sitting comfortably? prevent and manage back pain,” movement too. “Squats and mindfulness, relaxation and
Investing in a fancy ergonomic says Lucie Cowan, a personal lunges mimic the demands breathing techniques, but
chair is unnecessary, Newsome trainer at Third Space London. of everyday life,” Cowan says. they can be powerful.” n

The Sunday Times Magazine • 49

 H E A LT H

How I closed the book on booze

Reading helped get Daisy Buchanan into drinking — and then helped her quit

n my dreams, I’m the sort

I
of person who swings from
chandeliers. Find me in a
dimly lit bar, in pearls and
black satin, sipping icy
champagne. I’ll lead you
through a doorway into
a riot of red feathers,
fireworks and literary
friends. We might meet
Olivia Curtis from
Invitation to the Waltz, or Linda
Radlett, fresh from her coming
out ball in The Pursuit of Love,
or if we’re really lucky, Bridget
Jones at a book launch.
In real life, I’ve become the
sort of person who itches to
switch off the overhead light.
Big parties make me anxious,
and I can’t take the edge off
that anxiety with a glass of
champagne. I quit drinking
alcohol more than two years
ago. Books began my love affair
with big, boozy parties. Then
books helped me to get sober.
I still love going to wild parties
on the page, even when it
became clear that I couldn’t
keep the party going in real life.
I was 17 when I started
drinking in earnest and 37 when
I stopped. As a teenager I was a
pretentious drinker — I idolised
Dorothy Parker, and if anyone
asked what my favourite drink
What I learnt from these books Her life seemed glamorous but
she was haunted by alcohol. It
was, I’d have said “a dry martini” is that life without alcohol isn’t a was stealing her memories. Like
— when my real favourite was me, she was also struggling to
“whatever’s open”. My student punishment, it’s a life of freedom manage money. I loved this
years were typically messy. book but I also hated it. When
After I graduated, I should was that when I started, I never were having cocaine blown up Hepola wrote about her credit
have slowed down. Instead, I wanted to stop. your bottom or blacking out and card debt, the anonymous
stumbled into journalism. I was Deep down, I think I always buying a tram like Elton John. phone calls she avoided and
delighted to discover that my knew “drinker” was a pose Still, occasionally I would the envelopes she hadn’t
new colleagues were out every I couldn’t maintain. Early read something that made me opened, I felt angry. What did
night at a different event with in my drinking I started to uncomfortable. When I was 31, that have to do with drinking?
a free bar, and I was expected seek out addiction memoirs, I stumbled upon Sarah Hepola’s Specifically, what did it have to
to join in. In my thirties I made subconsciously searching for memoir, Blackout. Hepola was do with my drinking?
efforts to cut back and grow proof that I was OK. Luckily for like me — an entertainment As my thirties progressed, the
up; here a Dry January, there me, according to most books journalist whose job revolved hangovers became much worse
a Sober October. But the truth you were in trouble only if you around going to boozy parties. — but that happened to

50 • The Sunday Times Magazine

 Daisy Buchanan has sitting. The next day I read revelling in its seedy glamour
been sober since Catherine Gray’s kind, funny, without having to fret about
June 23, 2022 wonderful The Unexpected Joy Francis Bacon’s unsuitable
of Being Sober — a book that had boyfriends. I reread an old
been on my radar for months, teenage favourite, Ralph’s Party
intriguing and frightening me. by Lisa Jewell, and noticed that
Both books introduced me at the eponymous event, the
to the concept of taking your unhappiest, most troubled
life one day at a time: if it’s characters drink the most.
Thursday, you don’t need to If you’re in a good place you
worry about how you’ll stay don’t need to fake happiness
sober on Saturday. It also made with champagne.
me realise that I was constantly Perhaps that’s the best lesson
worrying about every single I learnt from the sobriety
aspect of my future: convincing memoirs. My life without
myself something terrible was alcohol isn’t a punishment. It’s
right around the corner and a life of freedom. I have a greater
spending all my energy battling capacity for joy. I’ve learnt
against it. Alcohol wasn’t my to trust myself. I’m better at
biggest problem; it was masking letting myself feel good — and
my biggest problem — that bad. Sometimes I’m anxious
everyone. I’d wake up feeling kept drinking. So I didn’t finish I believed I was worthless and sometimes everything feels
badly anxious but then I always the book. And I kept drinking. unless I was working flat out, hard, but I know I have the skills
felt anxious about everything. Maybe I’d keep going for a achieving impossible goals. and resources to meet these
I suspected I was drinking too couple of years and stop when Sobriety slowed me down. challenges. Dark days no longer
much but I didn’t drink every I turned 40. Or 60. I reached 10 days, 50 days, become dark weeks or months.
night. I also had a complicated I didn’t last that long. In 100 days. I’d never have Parties can be challenging
relationship with food, bingeing June 2022 I was on holiday in managed to get to day 100 if I’d but if I’m stuck for something
between restrictive diets. Copenhagen and, after three tried to plan for it on day one. to say, I might ask you about the
I hated my body and I kept days of lunchtime beers and When I was having a bad, sad last book you loved or whether
buying clothes that didn’t pre-dinner cocktails, became or mad day — and there were you’ve tried any of Bertie
fit me. I was obsessed with overwhelmed by abstract plenty of those — I cheered Wooster’s hangover cures. Now
work and terrified of failure. feelings of shame and self-pity. myself up by returning to one I’m sober, I’m a better listener.
Was alcohol the key to I started crying and couldn’t of my beloved boozy books. Instead of being filled with
understanding all this or was stop. It was frightening until Sober, I started to realise that edgy, drunken main character
it the only thing that made my I started to piece a solution I didn’t have to emulate my energy, I want to hear about
other issues easier to bear? together. The feelings weren’t favourite characters because you. I’m still taking my life one
I wasn’t ready to find out yet, created by alcohol, but I had to the alcohol-sodden parties were day at a time and I can’t predict
though addiction memoirs kept take alcohol away if I was going much more fun on the page. the future, but for me, sobriety
finding their way to the top of to find the strength to deal with I could reread Rivals and attend feels like a happy ending n
my pile. I loved some of them my mental health. Finally, I was Patrick O’Hara’s glamorous 21st
but others infuriated me. In ready to take on board what the birthday party as many times as Read Yourself Happy: How
Quit Like a Woman, the author books had been trying to tell me. I wanted, hangover free. I spent to Use Books to Ease Your
Holly Whitaker used science to On June 23, 2022, my first a lot of my spare time in the Anxiety by Daisy Buchanan
ILLUSTRATION BY NATHALIE LEES FOR THE SUNDAY TIMES MAGAZINE. JILL MEAD / GUARDIAN / EYEVINE

prove that alcohol isn’t safe to sober day, I downloaded Laura Colony Room, gorging myself (DK Red £16.99). Order
drink. If I’d read to the end, McKowen’s memoir We Are the on Darren Coffield’s oral history at timesbookshop.co.uk.
there was no way I could have Luckiest and read it in one of the notorious drinking club, Discount for Times+ members

THE MEMOIRS THAT HELPED ME GET SOBER

The Unexpected The Sober Diaries, Nothing Good Can
Joy of Being Sober, by Clare Pooley Come from This,
by Catherine Gray Pooley’s inspiring, by Kristi Coulter
Warm, funny and encouraging book Elegant, funny and
empathetic. Gray started life as a furious, Coulter’s
explores her blog. This day-by- essays about trying
difficult relationship day account of her to stay sober in a
with alcohol and challenges, fears world that wants
how abstinence and victories you to drink will
has brought her helped me strike a chord with
peace. This book enormously when anyone who has
guided me through I needed gentle struggled to avoid
my first faltering encouragement alcohol while
days of alcohol- to stay strong and maintaining a
free living. stick with sobriety. social life.

The Sunday Times Magazine • 51

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 in our council facilities for
children with complex needs
— after parents told me their
disabled children weren’t being
A L I F E I N THE D AY invited to parties or that there
weren’t any accessible venues.

Lilian Seenoi-Barr And I started Our Guildhall,

Our Place so young people
could take ownership of their
city. Every month 200 of them
Northern Ireland’s first black mayor, 43 come to the civic building to
talk and have fun. We ask them
what they want to see from
their city in the next ten years.
Afternoons are about being

S
eenoi-Barr was born and
raised in Narok County, visible as mayor. You’ll find me
Kenya. After being in a community centre, cutting
threatened for her work a ribbon at a play park or having
as a women’s rights a cup of tea with senior citizens.
activist, and concerned Evenings are for celebrations.
about the safety of her I could be making a speech
autistic son, Brian, she moved at a charity gala or hosting a
with him to Londonderry, reception for local heroes. And I
Northern Ireland, as refugees chair monthly council meetings.
in 2010. She received British There were mixed reactions
citizenship in 2018, joined when I was elected mayor. Some
the Social Democratic and people said I was an outsider
Labour Party and became a — what do I know about Derry?
councillor in 2021. In June I wasn’t surprised. I’ve been here
2024 she was elected mayor 15 years working for racial equity
of Derry and Strabane. She and against misinformation
lives in Londonderry with her about migrants through my
husband, Paul, and Brian, 23. charity, North West Migrants
Forum. I have to thank Alex
My day always starts with coffee Jones, the far-right
— Kenyan is the best. Paul commentator who tweeted
makes it for me whether I’m about me. He thought he was
starting at 4am or 7am. He’s giving me bad publicity calling
from Derry and when we me an invader but he put Derry
met he was working for the on the map and I got invitations
Changaro Trust, a charity that to visit from lots of countries.
builds refuges and schools in I finish work at about 8pm
Kenya. We weren’t an item in and Paul usually cooks dinner.
Kenya, but when I came to He’s learnt how to cook like a
Derry it was so nice to see a against these in 1999. By 2005 Kenyan — chapatis, nyama
familiar face. We got married in my brother and I had rescued
WORDS OF WISDOM choma (grilled meat) and
2018 and, soon after, he adopted about 5,000 girls. We took them Best advice I was given kachumbari (tomato and onion
Brian — his biological father to centres where they were My mum always told me salad) — but he also makes
isn’t in the picture. If I’m home given support to continue to be true to myself, never beautiful roasties. On a rare day
alone with Brian for more than their education. My dad is the let anybody make decisions off I’ll lie on the sofa watching
a couple of hours he’ll go to the biggest feminist. He is one of for me and always be TV. Derry Girls is like a religion.
door and check for Paul. the only Maasai men I know considerate of others If I had to pick a favourite
The three of us have breakfast who allocated his land to his character I’d say Michelle — the
together before Brian goes to daughters. Some people don’t Advice I’d give actress Jamie-Lee O’Donnell is
daycare. Back home, beliefs want progress and threats Do what you love and ignore from Derry. She’s so funny.
about autism — that it’s a bad followed me everywhere. But keyboard warriors who can’t Derry is a beautiful place and
omen or a curse — put Brian in when Brian was born the face you in real life we are a welcoming community.
danger. I loved the work I was threats were no longer just We will always have that dark
doing in Kenya but I prioritised about me. What I wish I’d known history of conflict but we have
my little boy and left. My days are so varied as That a lunatic like Alex Jones thrived by having open dialogue.
I am a Maasai woman and we mayor. It’s a myth that the job is was going to tweet about We believe in social justice and
have a rich culture, but there are purely ceremonial — you can me. Maybe I would have inclusion. It doesn’t matter who
MILKWOOD STUDIO

also some negative practices, have a lot of influence even acted really crazy to give you are or where you’re from
including female genital during a one-year term. For him something worth — when you come to a city like
mutilation and early forced instance, I created the Inclusive tweeting about Derry, it becomes your home n
marriage. I began campaigning Birthday Party — a celebration By Yasmin Choudhury

58 • The Sunday Times Magazine

 Your holiday includes
Luxury Hotel Stays
• Three-night five-star hotel stay
LIMITED
in Phan Thiết at the Anantara
AVAILABILITY
Mui Ne Resort
• Two-night five-star stay in Ho
Chi Minh City at the Grand Hotel
All-Inclusive Luxury Mekong River Cruise Saigon

with Vietnam and Cambodia Tour • Two-night five-star hotel stay in

Siem Reap at the Borei Angkor
River Cruising 15 Nights Sept, 2025 - April, 2026 Resort and Spa
• All hotel stays include breakfast
All-Inclusive River Cruise
Delve into southeast Asia’s • Seven-night all-inclusive river
multi-faceted wonders with cruise on board Mekong Navigator
discovery tours, a Mekong • Visiting*: Mỹ Tho, Sa Đéc, Mỹ An
River cruise, and a sumptuous Hưng, Phnom Penh (overnight in
beachfront haven stay. port), Opopel Village, Siem Reap
Fully Escorted Tours
Your adventure begins in Phan Thiết with
• Củ Chi Tunnels and
a luxury three-night beachfront hotel stay
Angkor Wat
at Anantara Mui Ne Resort. Next, head
to Ho Chi Minh City for a two-night hotel All Flights and Transfers
stay. A modern metropolis known for its • London departure
Angkor Wat • Overnight flight
French colonial landmarks, your time
here will unveil the city’s high-octane zest Adorned with awe-inspiring temples,
for life. this Unesco World Heritage site CRUISE CODE: ASA2229
beckons you to tread through time.
In Mỹ Tho, you’ll join the Mekong
Once lost to the jungle, Angkor Wat’s Prices from*
Navigator for an all-inclusive river cruise.
evocative stone spires have reached
Float past ancient temples and pagodas, SUPERIOR SUITE £3,299PP
to the heavens for nearly 900 years.
Buddhist monasteries and busy port
On this day’s fully escorted tour,
towns, stepping off to enjoy captivating VISTA SUITE+ £3,909PP
you’ll discover the temples unique
experiences in Cambodia and Vietnam. importance to Hindu and Buddhist
Arriving in Siem Reap, you’ll be treated to history, and get up close to its SIGNATURE SUITE+ £4,679PP
a two-night, five-star hotel stay at Borei remarkable bas-reliefs and symbolic
Angkor Resort and Spa. carvings. GRAND SUITE+ £5,549PP

*Price and itinerary shown are based on November 19, 2025 departure. +Vista Suite, Signature Suite and Grand suite prices shown are based on September 24, 2025 departure.

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