KENYA INSTITUTE OF PROFESSIONAL COUNSELLING

CAMPUS: NAKURU CAMPUS

UNIT TITLE: FAMILY COUNSELLING

MODULE CODE:

TITLE OF THE ESSAY: BASIC QUALITIES IN FAMILY AND MARRIAGE (COHESION

FLEXIBILITY AND COMMUNICATION)

ADMISSION NO: 10813

SUPERVISOR: MADAM GRACE

DATE OF SUBMISSION:

SIGNATURE:
Contents
Introduction...............................................................................................................................................3
Cohesion in Marriage and Family............................................................................................................4
Flexibility in Marriage and Family..........................................................................................................4
Communication in Marriage and Family.................................................................................................5
Interrelationship Between Cohesion, Flexibility, and Communication....................................................5
Challenges and Recommendations..........................................................................................................6
Conclusion...................................................................................................................................................7
References...................................................................................................................................................8
Introduction

Marriage and family constitute fundamental units of society, influencing individual well-being
and societal cohesion. Effective marital and family relationships often hinge on three essential
qualities: cohesion, flexibility, and communication. These qualities enable families to adapt,
thrive, and maintain functional dynamics amidst challenges. In the Kenyan context, the
importance of these qualities is evident given the country’s unique cultural, economic, and social
realities. This essay examines cohesion, flexibility, and communication as key components of
marital and family relationships, illustrating their significance with examples.
Cohesion in Marriage and Family

Cohesion refers to the emotional bonding and sense of togetherness within a family unit. It
involves the extent to which family members feel connected and prioritize their relationships.
High cohesion is characterized by mutual support, shared values, and collective responsibility,
while low cohesion often manifests as disconnection and individualism.

In Kenya, cohesion in families is influenced by cultural practices, such as extended family

systems and community networks. For instance, the traditional practice of "harambee" (pulling
together) fosters a sense of unity and collective effort. However, rapid urbanization and changing
social dynamics have strained these traditional bonds. According to a study by Owuor and
Mbutu (2020), urban families in Kenya face challenges in maintaining cohesion due to work-
related migrations and economic pressures.

Families with high cohesion demonstrate better resilience during crises. For example, during the
COVID-19 pandemic, families that upheld strong emotional bonds reported less psychological
distress compared to those with weaker ties (Njuguna et al., 2021). Such families provided
emotional and material support, which was critical in navigating the pandemic’s socioeconomic
impacts.

Cohesion also plays a crucial role in child development. Research by Mwangi and Kihara (2019)
revealed that children from cohesive families in Kenya exhibited higher academic achievement
and lower rates of delinquency. This finding underscores the importance of fostering strong
emotional bonds to nurture well-rounded individuals who contribute positively to society.

Flexibility in Marriage and Family

Flexibility refers to a family’s ability to adapt to changes and navigate challenges effectively. It
involves balancing stability and adaptability, ensuring that roles, rules, and expectations evolve
as circumstances change. Flexible families are better equipped to manage life transitions, such as
financial difficulties, health crises, or the loss of a family member.

In Kenya, the adaptability of families is often tested by economic challenges. For instance,
families in rural areas frequently adjust their dynamics to accommodate seasonal agricultural
activities. A study by Wainaina et al. (2018) highlighted that families practicing flexibility by
diversifying income sources demonstrated higher resilience against poverty.

Gender roles also play a significant role in family flexibility. Traditional Kenyan families often
adhere to rigid gender norms, which can hinder adaptability. However, a growing trend toward
egalitarian roles is emerging, particularly in urban settings. For example, in dual-income
households, spouses increasingly share domestic responsibilities to balance work and family
demands (Ngugi & Otieno, 2020).

Flexibility is particularly crucial during crises. During the 2007-2008 post-election violence in
Kenya, families that displayed adaptability, such as relocating to safer areas or reconfiguring
their economic activities, were more likely to recover. These examples highlight the necessity of
fostering flexibility to build resilient family units.

Communication in Marriage and Family

Communication is the process through which family members exchange information, express
emotions, and resolve conflicts. Effective communication fosters understanding, trust, and
problem-solving, while poor communication can lead to misunderstandings and relational
breakdowns.

In Kenyan families, communication patterns are influenced by cultural norms, education levels,
and generational differences. Traditional norms often discourage open communication,
particularly on sensitive topics such as sexuality or mental health. This cultural barrier can hinder
relationship satisfaction and problem-solving. For example, a study by Karani and Njoroge
(2017) found that couples who engaged in open and honest communication reported higher
marital satisfaction compared to those who avoided discussing sensitive issues.

Digital communication has also reshaped family interactions in Kenya. With the proliferation of
smartphones and social media, families increasingly rely on digital platforms to stay connected.
While this trend has facilitated long-distance communication, it has also introduced challenges
such as reduced face-to-face interactions and potential misunderstandings. A survey by Wachira
et al. (2021) indicated that 65% of Kenyan families used WhatsApp to maintain communication,
particularly during the COVID-19 lockdowns. However, over-reliance on digital communication
sometimes led to misinterpretations and conflicts.

Effective communication is particularly vital in conflict resolution. For instance, family

counseling programs in Kenya emphasize active listening and empathy as key strategies for
resolving disputes. Families that adopt these communication techniques report improved
relationships and reduced conflict frequency.

Interrelationship Between Cohesion, Flexibility, and Communication

Cohesion, flexibility, and communication are interdependent qualities that collectively contribute
to family well-being. High cohesion enhances communication, as emotionally connected family
members are more likely to engage in open and supportive dialogue. Similarly, effective
communication fosters flexibility by enabling families to discuss and implement necessary
changes collaboratively.

For example, a cohesive family facing financial difficulties is more likely to communicate
openly about their challenges and devise flexible strategies to overcome them. Conversely, poor
communication can weaken cohesion and hinder adaptability. A study by Onyango and Owino
(2019) highlighted that families with strong cohesion and effective communication were better
equipped to handle life transitions, such as relocation or retirement.
Challenges and Recommendations

Despite the importance of cohesion, flexibility, and communication, Kenyan families face
significant challenges in cultivating these qualities. Economic pressures, cultural norms, and
generational conflicts often undermine family dynamics. To address these challenges, several
recommendations can be made:

1. Promoting Family Counseling Programs: Counseling services should be accessible and

culturally sensitive to address family issues effectively. Programs that emphasize active
listening, empathy, and conflict resolution can enhance communication and cohesion.
2. Encouraging Work-Life Balance: Employers should adopt policies that support work-
life balance, enabling families to spend quality time together and strengthen their bonds.
3. Integrating Family Education in Schools: Schools can play a role in fostering family
values by integrating family education into the curriculum. Topics such as
communication skills and adaptability can be introduced to prepare young individuals for
future family roles.
4. Leveraging Technology Responsibly: Families should use digital tools to complement,
rather than replace, face-to-face interactions. Educational campaigns on responsible
technology use can help mitigate the negative impacts of digital communication.
Conclusion

Cohesion, flexibility, and communication are foundational qualities that determine the health and
functionality of marriage and family relationships. In the Kenyan context, these qualities are
particularly vital given the country’s dynamic cultural, economic, and social environment. While
challenges such as economic pressures and cultural norms persist, adopting strategies such as
counseling programs, work-life balance policies, and family education can enhance these
qualities. By fostering cohesion, flexibility, and communication, Kenyan families can build
resilient units that contribute to individual well-being and societal stability.
References

1. Karani, J., & Njoroge, P. (2017). The role of communication in marital satisfaction
among couples in Nairobi County. African Journal of Family Studies, 12(3), 45-56.
2. Mwangi, A., & Kihara, T. (2019). Family cohesion and child development in Kenya: A
longitudinal analysis. Kenyan Journal of Social Research, 14(2), 87-103.
3. Ngugi, C., & Otieno, L. (2020). Gender role flexibility in urban Kenyan families:
Implications for work-life balance. Journal of Modern African Studies, 58(4), 623-641.
4. Njuguna, S., et al. (2021). Coping strategies among Kenyan families during the COVID-
19 pandemic: A resilience perspective. East African Medical Journal, 98(1), 27-34.
5. Onyango, M., & Owino, D. (2019). Interdependence of cohesion, communication, and
flexibility in Kenyan families. Journal of African Psychology, 6(2), 101-120.
6. Owuor, E., & Mbutu, A. (2020). Urbanization and family cohesion in Kenya: Trends and
implications. African Journal of Urban Studies, 9(1), 15-33.
7. Wachira, P., et al. (2021). Digital communication and family dynamics during COVID-
19 lockdowns in Kenya. Journal of Contemporary African Studies, 39(3), 312-329.
8. Wainaina, J., et al. (2018). Family adaptability and poverty resilience in rural Kenya.
Kenyan Journal of Development Studies, 11(4), 201-218.