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Session 6 Compassion

The document discusses self-compassion and the inner critic. It defines self-compassion and explains its three components: self-kindness, common humanity, and mindfulness. The document also explores the importance of self-compassion in reducing things like anxiety, depression, and rumination while improving relationships and motivation.

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harishma muralikumar
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34 views35 pages

Session 6 Compassion

The document discusses self-compassion and the inner critic. It defines self-compassion and explains its three components: self-kindness, common humanity, and mindfulness. The document also explores the importance of self-compassion in reducing things like anxiety, depression, and rumination while improving relationships and motivation.

Uploaded by

harishma muralikumar
Copyright
© © All Rights Reserved
We take content rights seriously. If you suspect this is your content, claim it here.
Available Formats
Download as PPT, PDF, TXT or read online on Scribd
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Session 6

Compassion
Mindfulness X
OUTLINE

This Presentation

1. The Inner Critic


2. Self-compassion
3. The Importance of Self-compassion
1
The Inner Critic
1. THE INNER CRITIC

Exercise

Imagine yourself in a situation in which you were disappointed


in yourself. For instance because you made a mistake, failed
to reach an important goal, because you messed something
up, etc.
1. THE INNER CRITIC

Exercise

 What were the words you spoke to yourself?

 What was the tone of (inner) voice?

 How did it make you feel?


1. THE INNER CRITIC

Words

 accusatory

 reproachful

 attacking
1. THE INNER CRITIC

Tone

 hard

 angry

 disappointed
1. THE INNER CRITIC

Feelings

 failure

 shame

 guilt

 inferiority

 fear
1. THE INNER CRITIC

Critic (internal)

 What is wrong with me?

 How could I let this happen?

 Why me?

 There is nothing I can do right

 If I continue like this, I will inevitably fail

 “Fool”
1. THE INNER CRITIC

Critic (external)

 “I look like a fat cow in this dress.”

 “I’m hopelessly inept with computers.”

 “I have the worst sense of direction of anyone I know!

 “I think I am the worst cook on this planet.”

 “I wonder how many times I have made this mistake before.”


1. THE INNER CRITIC

Critic (external)

”” It’s as if we’re saying: “I’m going to beat you to the


punch and criticize myself before you can.
I recognize how flawed and imperfect I am so you
don’t have to cut me down and tell me
what I already know
1. THE INNER CRITIC

A definition (Elliott, 1992)

”” The inner critic is an internal voice


that commands and sends
negative messages”
1. THE INNER CRITIC

3 types of messages

disapproving
imperative thoughts, negative
“you should” feelings and predictions
behaviour
1. THE INNER CRITIC

Intrapersonal consequences

Relation to the etiology and preservation of different types of


psychopathology:
depression (Beck, 1987; Blatt, 1995)
social anxiety (Clark, Watson, & Mineka, 1994)
drug addiction (Blatt, Rounsaville, Eyre, & Wilber, 1984)
eating disorders (Lehman & Rodin, 1989; Steiger et al., 1999)
1. THE INNER CRITIC

Interpersonal consequences

Individuals who score high on self-criticism:


have less friends and less satisfied with social support
(Moskowitz & Zuroff, 1991)

use more negative communication after a stressful event


(Santor, Pringle, & Israeli (2000)

report lower levels of trust and share a low amount of personal


information (Zuroff & Fitzpatrick, 1995)
1. THE INNER CRITIC

Possible cause

” !
Children with parents who are highly critical, control and
performance focused will be more self-critical as adults
(McCranie & Bass, 1984; Whiffen & Sasseville, 1991).
2
Self-compassion
2. SELF-COMPASSION

Compassion

”” Compassion involves sensitivity to the


experience of suffering, coupled with a deep
desire to alleviate that suffering.
2. SELF-COMPASSION

Compassion is not

Co-suffering:
means 2 people are suffering

victimizing someone
2. SELF-COMPASSION

Compassion involves

 acknowledgment of pain

 understanding pain/suffering

 empathy

 acceptance of the person who suffers

 the wish that suffering may decrease


2. SELF-COMPASSION

Self-compassion

”” Self-compassion is simply compassion


directed inward, relating to ourselves as the
object of care and concern when faced
with the experience of suffering.
2. SELF-COMPASSION

What self-compassion is not

Self-pity
“poor me”

isolated from all the rest

emotional tunnel vision


2. SELF-COMPASSION

What self-compassion is
2. SELF-COMPASSION

Self-compassionate voice

 I tried my best

 I am just like everybody else, just a human being

 I never signed a contract to be perfect

 I learned something

 next time, we do it differently


2. SELF-COMPASSION

3 Components

Self-kindness Common humanity Mindfulness

VS VS VS

Self-judgments Isolation Over-identification


2. SELF-COMPASSION

Kindness

Hard Kind

judgmental, harsh caring and understanding

attacking the self accepting the self

continuing no matter what stopping

external focus to solve the internal focus to heal the self


problem
2. SELF-COMPASSION

Common humanity

Isolation Connection

feeling as if this could only experiencing that everybody


happen to you fails and makes mistakes

feeling isolated from other feeling connected


who live a “normal” happy life with others
2. SELF-COMPASSION

Mindfulness

Unawareness Mindfulness

no pause stopping

believing negative observing negative


self-stories to be true self-stories

judgment and aware of judgment and


punishment punishment
3
The Importance of Self-
compassion
3. THE IMPORTANCE OF SELF-COMPASSION

Intrapersonal effects

 lower level of anxiety and depression


(Neff, 2003; Neff, Hseih, & Dejitthirat, 2005; Neff, Kirkpatrick, & Rude, 2007)

 less rumination and thought suppression


(Neff, 2003; Neff, Kirkpatrick, & Rude, 2007)

 better insight in feelings and coping with negative feelings


(Neff, 2003)
3. THE IMPORTANCE OF SELF-COMPASSION

Interpersonal effects

 more emotionally connected, accepting, and autonomy


supporting (Neff, 2006)
 higher relationship satisfaction
(Neff, 2003; Neff, Kirkpatrick, & Rude, 2007)

 less need to project faults onto partners via angry accusations


(Feldman & Gowen, 1998)
3. THE IMPORTANCE OF SELF-COMPASSION

Critique

” !
A common reason for people to reject the idea of
self-compassion is that they believe that it will
cause a lack of motivation to address
personal shortcomings.
3. THE IMPORTANCE OF SELF-COMPASSION

Motivational effects

 greater personal initiative to make needed changes in


one’s life (Neff, Rude, & Kirkpatrick, 2007)
 more internal reasons for motivation, not social approval
(Neff et al, 2005)

 greater intrinsic rather than extrinsic motivation


(Magnus, 2007)
3. THE IMPORTANCE OF SELF-COMPASSION

Motivation

Emotion-based self-attack Compassionate self-correction

the wish to punish and judge the wish to improve

anger, frustration support

focus on complete self focus on specific aspect(s) of self

focus on prevention and fear of focus on growth and hope for


failure success
Thanks
For your attention

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