FADE IN FADE OUT

By Jonathan Douglas Duran

FADE IN

EXT. ROOFTOP OF A DOWNTOWN BUILDING - DUSK

A MAN stands on the roof, peering over the edge, glass of
scotch in hand. He is deep in thought and tinkling the ice
around in his glass rhythmically. He downs the rest of his
drink then proceeds to grab a bottle from OS and refill. He
continues his drinking/thinking.

In the background a WOMAN enters the roof. The heavy access
door she just walked through automatically slams closed, she
is shocked by the unexpected noise and impulsively tries to
open the door again, but it has locked behind her, she does
not have a key for re-entry.

The man takes silent notice of her presence, and then
returns to his private contemplations.

The woman wanders near and stares out over the edge as well
- into the sky, the street, the railroad tracks below, etc.

MAN
Beautiful night, no?

WOMAN
Yes yes, it is.

They nod all silent pleasantries and the like.
(BEAT)

MAN
Drink?
(He motions towards her with his glass)

WOMAN
Oh, no thanks dont touch the stuff.

MAN
(Look of shock)
Really?

WOMAN
Is it so hard to believe?

MAN
No, its not that its just exactly
what Ive been thinking about.

WOMAN
About people who dont drink?

MAN
About, not touching the stuff.

WOMAN
Meaning, you want to quit?

MAN
Yeah, I think so I do it a bit too much
I think.

WOMAN
So then, from one extreme to another
you know, they say moderation is key.

MAN
Im not sure I have much restraint in
me. It may very well just have to be all
or nothing.

WOMAN
Well, if you want to stop, you should
stop.

MAN
(Grinning)
Seems easy, huh? I always imagined so. I
dont remember ever being addicted to
anything; I smoked cigarettes for 8
years, heavily then one day I just quit
cold turkey because I was sick of
it.

WOMAN
Impressive (she smiles and pulls a pack
of cigarettes from her pocket lights
one, then inhales and exhales the smoke
deeply. She then motions towards him
with the cigarettes, offering one)

MAN
No thanks, never touch the things.

WOMAN
Well, everyone has their vices; you just
have to wait around long enough for
people to reveal them.

MAN
Everyone. Even those who proclaim some
superiority over others especially
those, it seems.


WOMAN
Well, their claims themselves are a
vice. Unhealthy and addictive, just like
these.
(Looking at her cigarette and then taking
another drag)

MAN
Unhealthy and addictive can describe
most of what goes on in my life

WOMAN
That explains most of what goes on
everywhere.

They both stare out at the sky line as it begins to darken

MAN
You know what I cant stand?

WOMAN
No idea

MAN
Myself, most of the time. My
indifference, sloth, ambivalence,
whatever you want to call it my
inability to act on any level beyond
managing the minutia, the tedium of my
rote, everyday life. Slave at work, and
squander my free time trying to convince
myself I can enjoy my life. Little
things like television and music, its
so banal. I try to overcompensate for my
tedious existence by clinging to
grandiose ideas.

WOMAN
Like?

MAN
Aww, this is silly. As if I werent
already acting the pretentious, drunken
bore

WOMAN
No, please, go on, I find this sort of
thing quite compelling, truth be told.
Actually, its kind of refreshing.

MAN
Ha! I can tell were going to get along
well if you dare indulge me grandiose
ideas like Im going to write the great
American novel. Like something,
anything, anything at all, is just
around the corner to enhance my lot in
life. Something is going to happen that
changes things and I break out of my
impoverished mental state.

WOMAN
And theyre grandiose because they never
happen?

MAN
Theyre grandiose because I never do
anything to propagate them. I say Im
going to write a novel and after three
years of trying all Ive got is a series
of discombobulated notes and a partial
first chapter.

WOMAN
So maybe writing just isnt your strong
suit.

MAN
No, it goes beyond that. I can write; I
just dont. I suffer from some sort of
self-inflicted ennui, I try to act, but
cant.

WOMAN
What is it that stops you?

MAN
Anything, everything. I drone off-and-on
-off-and-on at work for eight hours and
by the time Im free to do anything
Im too damned tired and worn out. My
mind is sedated, distraught by the
mental degradation it endured at the
office! Then of course comes this (holds
up his glass), the real avatar of my
pitiful despairs; the real crutch I drag
my crippled life around with. I come
home and immediately put a drink into my
hand, then I just keep re-filling it
until my whole head is in the drink. Im
tired from working all day and Im
drunk, so all my good intentions just
deteriorate into feints and sloppy,
stutter-steps.

WOMAN
Hmmm, well, it seems like youre just
making excuses; if the only time you
have to write is at night when youre
tired, then thats when you write.
Simple as that put on a pot of coffee,
suck it up and burn the midnight oil.
many other writers have produced amazing
works under much greater duress.

MAN
I know, it seems pathetic; Im the model
of white collar bourgeoisie, I prance
through my entitled life, aloof to
genuine suffering while bemoaning my
insignificant neurosis; a weak little
victim to my trifling fears. Ive got
nothing substantial to be unhappy about,
yet I still just cant help it.
(BEAT)
Im being serious here, I understand I
may come off as conceited and
insufferable, but Im fucking serious.
(BEAT)
Do me a favor, dont leave me hanging
here, admit that your life is the same
you just cant be happy can you?
Something keeps you from feeling that
stillness you so desperately need.

WOMAN
(BEAT)
Fine youre right. Of course, I tried;
I try, that is I never really know
exactly what Im trying for - but I
still know that I dont exactly have it.
(BEAT)
I dont feel at peace, no.

MAN
Of course I imagine everybody is
afflicted with this, some just refuse to
admit it.

WOMAN
Well, at the very least everyone is
afflicted with something.

MAN
Something Its so peculiar to look up
at that sky and imagine everyone,
everywhere, thinking, feeling, doing
something all at once. It really makes
you think of how insignificant your life
is.

WOMAN
You give your life its own significance,
if youre looking to the lives of
others, or looking to the world to give
your life some sort of tangible meaning
then youre just wasting your time.

MAN
Im pretty good at wasting my time I
mean, thats what Ive been saying. All
this useless desire that translates into
a lot of nothing

WOMAN
Well, you dont want to have to find out
the hard way that you have no more time
to waste.

MAN
How so?

WOMAN
You wake up one day (BEAT), you wake up
and find out that youve only got a
little sliver of time left to do
anything, let alone worry about a
career, any sort of personal
fulfillment, or any of the existential
mental masturbation concerning your
place in the grand scheme of the world.

MAN
I know, its true but for some reason I
still find excuses to drink, to not
write, to just rot away at my own little
pace. Im stuck with some sort of self-
guilt, like Im forcing myself to atone
for some awful past sin by not allowing
myself to be happy.

WOMAN
Whats your big sin?

MAN
I dont know maybe its not even a big
sin, but just the accumulation of
innumerable small ones that Ive
committed throughout my life.

WOMAN
Well, now here we are talking like those
poor suckers we mentioned earlier,
victims of their own ridiculous beliefs
of superiority defining morality. Sin
what a silly concept. Theres no point
in waiting around for some sort of
judgment, trust me, youre judged every
single day of your life.

Staring into his glass, the man looks up, smiles and leans
over the roof edge, looking at the railroad tracks below, he
then POURS the contents of his glass over the edge, then he
DROPS the glass itself -- we see the glass SHATTER on the
tracks far below.

MAN
Theres the easy part, the part Ive
done in one form or another hundreds of
times by now the difficult part will be
not filling up another glass.

WOMAN
Its a start anyway
(leans OC and picks up the bottle)
now what about this? Sometimes you just
have to toss things over the edge that
are dragging you down jettison the
superfluous weight so that you can take
off.

MAN
(He takes the bottle and dangles it over the
edge, musing finally he DROPS the bottle and
we see it SHATTER below)

It feels good, but it also feels you
know, false.

WOMAN
Like in this minute youre strong and
youre able to throw it away but come
tomorrow youll fall right back into it
you lie to me, you lie to yourself its
just another vice isnt it?

She lights a cigarette and coughs violently as she exhales

MAN
Maybe its time you quit.

WOMAN
Soon enough, Im almost there. Ive been
wanting to quit these for years now, but
just like you, I never acted on what I
wanted on what was best for me and what
I knew I could do if I actually put my
will into practice. But now well, now
it doesnt really matter.

MAN
Why not?

WOMAN
(Exhaling a long cloud of smoke)
Ohhhh Im not long for this life.

MAN
Youre not eh
(He smiles, then notices she has remained
stone-faced)
Wait, are you being serious?

WOMAN
As a heart attack, or more accurately
as a cancer.

MAN
Cancer, from smoking? Youre serious?

WOMAN
Thats what Ive been told.

MAN
Holy shit, youre so young I mean,
thats just fucking terrible.

WOMAN
Imagine how I feel Im a special
case; part of that one percent anomaly
that always throws the statistics out of
whack.

MAN
Jesus, I I dont know what to say.
(BEAT) When did you find out?

WOMAN
About three weeks ago they say its too
late to do anything about it spread
through pretty much everything in there.

MAN
Im so sorry-

WOMAN
Sympathy is the last thing I want right
now. Remember, I did this, I chose to
live my life a certain way, and now Im
faced with the consequences of my
actions. Theres nothing to feel sorry
about. Im paying the price for my
indifference; my bad habits for letting
my addictions control my life.

MAN
(BEAT) So what are you going to do?

WOMAN
Im going to die Im going to die on my
own terms; Im going to make a choice
and act. They want to put me into chemo
they say theres no way to save me, but
they want me to go through this shit
anyway they want to suck my bank
account dry while Ive still got some
blood pumping through my veins false
fucking hope just drawing out the
inevitable, making me and everyone else
I know suffer for no good reason other
than basic capitalistic gain. I lived
through that with my father when I was
nineteen he was diagnosed with terminal
brain cancer, it metastasized throughout
everything he had no chance, but they
convinced him to let them do a surgery.
So they cut his fucking head open and
dug around in there then when they
close him up he cant talk right, cant
walk, constantly has seizures before he
was fine, you never would have even
known he had cancer. Then of course,
came the chemotherapy, he lost his hair,
was always sick, tired he was already
dead. They took away what little life he
would have had left, they took away his
ability to be close to his family
(BEAT) so yeah fuck that. Im not going
through that, I will not slowly and
painfully rot away.

MAN
Im not sure what to say about all of
this I mean, I dont want to trivialize
this but youre putting me on right I
mean, youre pulling my fucking leg,
right?

WOMAN
(She just shakes her head - no)
Thats not even the most unbelievable
part of all this truth be told the
only reason I came up here tonight was
to jump.

MAN
Jump! You are fucking pulling my leg,
shut the hell up!

WOMAN
Why would I do that?

MAN
Oh, come on you seem pretty smart,
pretty cynical, I can see a dark sense
of humor in you youre just fucking
with me.

WOMAN
Look think what you want, Ive no
desire to try to convince you otherwise
lets just finish our little impromptu
conversation and you can go back to your
life where problems and choices like
mine are just an amusing little fiction.

MAN
Why would you tell me this?

WOMAN
I thought we were being honest here, and
I thought it applied to everything
youve been saying. I thought knowing
this might help you.

MAN
How would you jumping off a fucking roof
help me?

WOMAN
To show you that pretty soon youll be
backed into a corner and have no options
left. You want to do something? Then
fucking do it quit drinking, quit
smoking, start writing, start living
your life the way you want to you
control your actions, your choices are
your own and you hold all the power to
change your lot.

BEAT they both stare out into the skyline and we look down
to where the glass and the bottle broke before.

MAN
I wish I hadnt thrown that bottle away
now.

WOMAN
Well thats the point, thats the very
point do you wish that? Or are you just
using the bottle to drown out the fear?
Are you using it as an excuse or a mask?

MAN
So you never drink and even now, when it
wouldnt matter one way or another, you
still didnt want to drink

WOMAN
I dont enjoy it, so why would I drink
now? What would that do except very
literally leave a bad taste in my mouth
and give the doctors something to blame
my choice on find that in my blood
stream, itd be a cop-out, it would
cheapen this and give everyone a
scapegoat she was drunk.

MAN
But theyll know you have cancer,
thatll be the scapegoat.

WOMAN
Thats true, but knowing that I chose,
of seemingly sober and sound mind to do
this, is the whole point. Im choosing
this because I want to do it, not
because Im inebriated, not because Im
confused I demand to remain perfectly
lucid up until the last second, I
believe in the reality of my
convictions; I control my life no one
else. If I want to jump, Im going to
jump. Of course, Im not so aloof as to
assume they wont just blame my decision
on fear of the cancer they need things
to be easily explained, safe and
sensible they cant imagine someone
very carefully choosing to end their
life. It wouldnt make sense to them,
most people could never divorce
themselves far enough from their own
egos to conceive of choosing to end
their own life for logical and sane
reasons.

MAN
I honestly dont know what to say to any
of this but I understand. I really do
and if youre serious about all of this
then I promise Im not going to
interfere. I admire you. (BEAT) So
would you like me to leave?

WOMAN
Well, you can stay for just a little bit
longer.

They both stare out, silently thinking for a few beats, it
is dark now. The sign above their heads buzzes rhythmically
and pulses its neon red light onto their faces, the wind has
picked up and we hear it howling.

MAN
Its cold

WOMAN
Yes, it is

The man moves closer toward the woman and puts his arm
around her, she seems unsure at first, but soon comfortably
rests her head on his shoulder. They stand together for a
minute and as we see their faces, illuminated by the
manufactured red glow of the giant neon sign, they are both
slightly wet with tears, yet not openly sobbing.

WOMAN
Its time for you to go for us both to
go our separate ways.

MAN
All right.

He holds onto her for another few seconds, sighs, and then
lets her go. He smiles down at her and she smirks back, then
he turns and slowly walks away

He walks to the roof door and looks back one last time, then
uses his key to open it and walk on through. At the last
second before the door slams shut - his hand stops it from
closing and he peeks his head out.

MAN
Whats your name?

She turns to look at him, takes a beat, and smiles warmly.

WOMAN
Write me one.

FADE OUT

END