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“She who enjoys herself ... radiates her complacency in such a way that is instantly shared by
those around him, without the need to make your quality explicit through performance or
virtuous acts. She is so convinced of her merits that she does not feel that she has to beat
others, not even herself”. — CLAUDIO NARANJO
⠀⠀⠀In general, enneatype 2 believes that living with high emotional intensity and provoking
emotions is what counts the most in life. For that manipulates relationships. It is, in fact, a
surreptitious character authoritative mind, because you want to feel above others arousing
admiration and a special respect that feeds their pride.
⠀⠀⠀Indeed, he believes that his pride is his strength when, In fact, it is the neurotic and
destructive mode of it. The Two falsifies his self-perception: you feel a loving being capable of
giving yourself full, when in reality he is a being in need of love (a beggar disguised as a king),
who rejects his need, which would make him feel too fragile and exposed to abandonment.
Therefore he projects that need in others.
⠀⠀⠀Hers is disguised as generosity. And the stranger catches her on the net of his availability,
which is real but he uses it to feed the order. gullo and idealized self-image.
⠀⠀⠀Like a child, he is in intimate contact with love, but also with caprice and tyranny. Listening
to Mozart, of the subtype Two conservation, gives us the possibility to feel life as the feel of an
E2. There is color, harmony, warmth, play, joy, enjoyment, a kind of communion with the divine;
and also tragedy, chaos, sadness and a deep pain, cleverly concealed behind a historic smile,
hermal, like that of the protagonist of the movie Amadeus.
⠀⠀⠀The person of this character knew love, was seen and loved. He came like a breath of fresh
air to his house, but he learned too much. I soon realized that love had a price. Where
appropriate, be used as an object, emotional support or merchandise between his parents,
which gave rise to a feeling of humiliation and the development of the I cry like passion.
⠀⠀⠀It is paradoxical that, in reality, these eternal children did not have they saw childhood. It
was the price they paid to continue receiving the admiring love of his parents and maintaining
his place of power: a suffocating ono that allowed him to be seen but left little space to just be a
child.
⠀⠀⠀And this is his life: An incessant attempt to reconquer that place privilege that only children
can have. An urge to recover a loving gaze of approval and appreciation that It was necessary
to feel worthy of being loved. Return, after all, to paradise so lost.
⠀⠀⠀And in that endeavor, he has learned how to shine and the art of manipulation, and he
knows how to alternate sweet words with a more or less subtle, depending on the subtype. His
developed empathy is the compass that tells you what others need. And, as a charmer of
snakes, he will dazzle his lover in turn or the person, smearing him with compliments and
favors, until the other finishes thinking that it is a privilege to have you in his life. Of that devotion
that he manages to awaken in the other is what the Two feeds on.
⠀⠀⠀“My way of being is the result of becoming an adult too soon for not being able to allow
myself to be a child. He thought that “by making me older I would be more loved by my parents,
who praised me for my responsibility. Thus, he did not allow me to live the traits that he
associated with childhood (they say they are from E2 conservation): dependency,
irresponsibility, being capricious, even cuteness. They are part of me. I refused them until I
bumped into them in the therapeutic process. Although I believe I am of the sexual subtype, the
Social one is what comes later. The Social aspects prevailed in me in the first part of
adolescence, when what most interested me was power; I always was the leader or boss of
something. In the neighborhood gang, in the school band, in the boy scout patrol ... I liked to
rule. And so it was until the awakening of the sexual instinct. Then I stopped becoming so
interested in ambition, although not entirely, and I began dreaming of romantic love affairs and
looking for the ideal woman”. — LUIS HERNÁNDEZ
⠀⠀⠀An early accountability, as just described, it can be essential for the formation of this
character. His fantasy sia of grandeur allows you to validate the idea that you are special by
what day not because of who he is. From that vantage point avoid contacting him feeling of
inadequacy that he has since childhood and with his urgency to be protected and guided.
Conservation 2 — Privilege:
⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝
“If the emperor wants me, let him pay me. Well, just the honor of being with him is not enough
for me.” — W. A. MOZART
⠀⠀⠀E2 conservation has been the whim of mom or dad, the girl eternal that continues to seek
the favor of the elderly. Just as the emperador (E2 Social) is the most intellectual, and the king
(E2 Sexual), the most emotional, the prince is the most active (and dependent) of the three. He
uses his fragility and “giddiness” to gain favor. He’s selfish, whimsical, cuddly and playful. Unlike
the two other subtypes, he manipulates from a more childish position, much like a child would.
⠀⠀⠀The Conservative Two seems to have the right. He can act like he is superior to others and
expect preferential treatment, reaching be cheeky in your expectation of being pampered and
throw a tantrum if he doesn’t get what he wants. His logic is: “I give and do a lot for the rest;
That’s why I deserve special treatment”. As if, unconsciously, it will count by the hour how much
has been sacrificed for the other. It may seem that he’s going to be a diva.
⠀⠀⠀When he's around the other, he’s the subtype most prone to burnout, regardless of your
own needs. Do not rest enough, you do not spend time. He loves to receive people at home and
cook, but such once he is not allowed to enjoy the dinners and parties that he offers. Rest
unconsciously that their needs are met, but few pieces are able to ask for help frankly, but
hopes that someone else guessed it. In short, he tends to feel like a martyr and to think that the
other is in debt for services rendered.
⠀⠀⠀Proud of his sacrifices, his motto is “I have the right” (to which compensate them). He
comes to this conclusion, as a child: “I’m more important”. And since then he’s focused on
satisfying his wishes; he puts all his desire there. He is the most greedy with his things and the
one who shows the most selfish of the three subtypes.
⠀⠀⠀The demand for rewards for the many sacrifices coexists with excesses of food and drugs to
inhibit aggressiveness. The denial of problems alternates with complaints: he goes from “I don’t
need help. Nobody cares about me.” He often resorts to emotional manipulation, blaming the
other to achieve the satisfaction of their needs. (and when he dares to express them, he seldom
takes the lecture courses offered to you.)
⠀⠀⠀In his less sane expression, the Conservative Twos present such a great negligence with
his physique. Disorders are common eating disorders, psychosomatic syndromes and
hypochondrial disorders. In any case, the repression of emotional needs or aggressive feelings
can lead to serious health problems.
⠀⠀⠀Actually, E2s are generally little cared for, since their great goddess self-image makes them
feel invulnerable.
Social 2 — Ambition:
⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝
“I have long conversations with myself. and I’m so smart that sometimes I don’t understand not
a word I say”. — OSCAR WILDE
⠀⠀⠀The Social Twos are known for their ambition to be in everyone’s heart and to be publicly
recognized as leading people. They directly seek attention and confuse being thought of with
being loved. They may act provocatively or hostile in order not to be ignored. Or marry
influential people and focus your energies on the couple’s goals, raising children to succeed in
this world. Model mothers and competent wives are frequent in this character next to E3.
⠀⠀⠀The worst thing in this world is not being on the lips of others, but not being in nobody’s
mouth. Being talked about is awful. That they do not talk, it is worse.
⠀⠀⠀The Social instinct of the E2 is expressed in the motto: “I’m a friend of everybody”. There’s a
strong desire to be valued by all the people of its social sphere. They like to introduce people
and organize meetings at home. They are very efficient at making themselves needed and
experts at creating networks; today they could be called influencers. The others are surprised at
how they treat almost everyone, from staff to cleaning the manager who does not know
anything, with a close familiarity that makes them trustworthy. Another motto applicable to this
subtype is: “information is power”. And they have made it their own since they were children.
⠀⠀⠀They like to put themselves at the center of attention in the social sphere and have a strong
need to be remembered, fearing to pass unnoticed or feeling left out. They become intimate with
people valued in the group, until they are their indispensable support. If they feel insecure about
their power of social fascination, they cultivate new skills. They try to impress by giving advice;
spiritual, financial, doctors ... or with allusions to important people as if they know in privacy.
This puts them in trouble, because the desire to be known that they are friends of VIPs may
lead them to be discreet and reveal confidence.
⠀⠀⠀Social Twos most trapped in their character structure may frustrate their own by scattered,
with that wide range of contacts and not really paying attention to anyone. They are paternalistic
and like to do favors, but making it clear to the other person all they have done for him: “What
would you do without me?” It’s the classic accomplice Ice that covers up the misdeeds of an
important guy to make him feel in debt.
Sexual 2 — Seduction:
⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝
“In Madrid I never got to step on the street, because every time I appeared At the door of the
Ritz, a legion of knights threw their cloaks at the ground so that I would walk on them, laying
before me a rug that had no end.” — KILL HARI
⠀⠀⠀The E2 Sexual moves between seduction and aggressiveness, and combines fascination
and sensuality. It’s the most explicit, spontaneous and wild of the three subtypes. Just as the
Social Two seduces from the intellectual, and conservation, from tenderness, sexual does it
from the carnal. Is invasive and if he wants something, he takes it, just like the Sexual E4 or the
E8.
⠀⠀⠀Sexual 2 puts his empathy at the service of seduction more than out of a true interest in the
other. He knows how to weave cobwebs from which It is difficult to escape because he is
passionate when he is in the conquest.
⠀⠀⠀Is a person who knows himself special and wants to be unforgettable; His only one longing
is to be adored again.
⠀⠀⠀Her basic interest is to find romantic union, fusion, and con merges being desired, where he
is a master strategist, with being loved and valued. He can be a prodigal and forgiving father, or
a lover passionate and caring, or both.
⠀⠀⠀If you meet resistance, press and provoke, to disarm the objections. He can also accuse in
a furious manner, approaching to the E8. Underlying his outbursts of anger is a melancholy
desire for a total and enveloping connection with the other, aspiration close to E4.
“Pride is related to the opinion we have of ourselves; vanity, with what we would like others to
think of us.” — JANE AUSTEN
⠀⠀⠀Social E2 can be confused with Social E3 and, although subtle, there are determining
differences. The image of E3 is more chameleon, unique; Instead, the Two pretends to adapt,
as a means to reach your objectives. The E3 is finer and more sophisticated, and the E2, more
called mative, with a more personal style, which can be a bit eccentric.
⠀⠀⠀The Three controls his emotions more, especially in public, because it gives more
importance to its image being damaged. The Two, on the other hand, in his aggrandizement he
doesn’t see the consequences of his vehemence and condescension. If there is a conflict, the
E3 will keep the forms so as not to lose its image. Person E2 is more counterphobic, she
becomes passionate believing that she will be able to convince the other and ignores the signs
indicating that you are in danger of being excluded.
⠀⠀⠀They are both competitive. The E3 seeks recognition that is good and competes to be
valued for it. Two “knows” what it is the best and wants to be given its rightful place. The E3
experiences anxiety and doubts for fear of not succeeding. The E2, however, he’s confident that
he’s going to make it: his crazy idea is that he won’t need to compete, when he has been
competing all his life, with father, mother or siblings, even from a place of superiority.
⠀⠀⠀In the E2 conservation pride is not as visible as in the rest of Subtypes, hidden as it is by a
childish image.
⠀⠀⠀The proud belongs to the triad of the image (E2, E3 and E4), so the primeval fear, even
before not being worthy of to be loved is to not be seen. Disappear from the sight of the other,
be it princess, queen or empress, it means death. At the same time, your homework is to see
the other, who he only takes into account in relation to himself.
⠀⠀⠀The fear of conservation E2 is to bequeath to helplessness and not be able to support his
basic needs by himself. So I know anchor in its most childish part, seeking dependence and
authorization of someone to protect you.
⠀⠀⠀The sexual E2 is afraid of being alone, so he’s passionate about giving. Like the protagonist
of “How to be a Jewish Mother”, delusional meta about her desire to give herself to her children,
but also about how to create ingrained feelings of debt and guilt.
⠀⠀⠀The Social E2 subtype needs, to feel safe, to be the person of reference to his
surroundings, for which he renounces his emotions and Surrender to his own ambition or a
cause.
“My son adores me”, says an E4. “He just gave me a ticket for an Alaska cruise”. — “Well, he
idolizes me”, replies an E3. “He gave me the se Well past an apartment in Miami to spend the
whole year under the sun”.
⠀⠀⠀To avoid its latent fear, the conservation E2 disconnects from her sexuality and thus play the
role of a girl. The Sexual E2, of his intellect, to respond to patriarchal models of conquest. And
the E2 Social, of emotion, so as not to lose sight of the ambitional object. Do not feel the
exhaustion or think about the self-demand to which you submit.
⠀⠀⠀Each character gives meaning and value to life. In the case of E2 sounds like a lighthouse
and, at the same time, the engine is love. In love with the fantastic image they have created of
themselves, no wonder that is offered as an inexhaustible source of pleasure, well—being or
protection ... even those who are not interested. Its objective is to “Recover what they
experienced as unconditional love in childhood”. The three subtypes seek an intense and
inexhaustible loving contact that fills the void masked behind a childish egocentricity of which no
they end up detaching.
⠀⠀⠀The conservation E2 person lives it in relationships where they feel pampered and
protected. The Social E2, when recognized for its worth, especially who she considers an
authority. And the sexual E2 goes to eroticism, but always to feed the pride of being not with any
love, but exceptional, unique, eternal, that can fill the existential void.
⠀⠀⠀It is said that Two cannot love because she only loves herself same. The truth is that he
only recognizes himself worthy of love when he gives, when he does, when he helps. He does
not know how to love himself for who, yes and look for in the other’s gaze to be kind. Host the
idea that if they need you, they will love you.
⠀⠀⠀So even though I go enjoy king, is nothing but a beggar, a hungry for love, capable of
anything, including manipulation, self-expression, plotting or cruelty, if necessary, to obtain it.
⠀⠀⠀The princess, in love with her childish image, only pretends the affection of her protector on
her turn. The queen goes further; in love of love, she seeks the devotion of her closest lovers
and friends.
⠀⠀⠀And the self-proclaimed empress craves the love of her empire. The Two Social did not find
her place in the family with respect to siblings. Hence her need to please everyone. It is as if
other ”systems” will look for that site that she could not find on her own; pleasing the entire
audience.
“We have felt orphaned of parents and siblings and we long for that emotional network
continuously. The more the merrier.” — MONICA ANGULO
⠀⠀⠀Of the three loves, all the subtypes share a love compassionate and erotic. They differ in
that the E2 Conservation It has a more compassionate component, like a mother; the E2
Sexual, more erotic, like a son; and the Social E2, like the father, more admiring.
⠀⠀⠀The proud establish unequal power relations. The E2 sexual is the active one, the one he
proposes, the masculine one. There is in the E2 conserved a more passive-feminine behavior.
Take a stand down, without proposing so much, waiting to be told how to do things.
⠀⠀⠀Offers tenderness, joy, innocence, the adventure that only a child fresh and witty can offer.
The sexual E2 offers passion, fire and intensity, as a teenager does. And the social E2, closer
from the adult world and from a very paternal role, offers security dad, dignity, protection, and
even salvation, if necessary.
⠀⠀⠀Sexual Two is dependent on the intimacy with others. Physical and emotional. If the Two
Social needs to be friends with everyone, the Sexual Two is to be the best friend of a person. It
is concentrated with few people, and he loves to consider himself the friend number one of his
friends, the most intimate confidante of his. It is fascinating spending moments with each other,
telling each other secrets, talking about the relationship and feeling informed about the preferred
topics of the other.
“We seduce, using lies, and we pretend to be loved by ourselves.” — PAUL GRALDY
⠀⠀⠀Seduction comes naturally to all self-conscious. They do it without barely putting conscience
into it, without measure or the slightest scruples, they take responsibility for the consequences it
may cause. The three subtypes despise, in their depths, people who give in to your seduction.
In fact, they enjoy manipulating and humiliating your suitors.
⠀⠀⠀The word seducer is associated with Two in general, but it is applied especially to the sexual
Two. The new guys know how to seduce each one of them. But the E3 Sexual is produced by
paying a lot of attention to you, always available to listen to your problems. A marked Sex
availability can also be part of the picture.
⠀⠀⠀He centers his passion in the act of conquest and in his own eroticism. If you are suddenly
in doubt about your ability to fascinate, a person of this subtype begins to besiege the other,
invaded for the fear of not being descada. He hardly accepts a “No” for an answer.
⠀⠀⠀If the Social Twos like to expand their circle of friends, the Sexual person prefers to have
friends just for himself, becoming extremely jealous and possessive: watch the other if I want to
lose sight of him or have him out of her reach, compulsively controls, and is unable to accept a
bad reaction, even setting traps or tormenting the object of his romantic obsession.
⠀⠀⠀If the Sexual E2 attracts with all her sexual energy, with each part of her person, the
Conservation E2 seduces with an apparent innocence with his naivety, with her ignorance and
inexperience. I can’t do not protect someone so tender and helpless, who wakes up the
maternal and paternal instincts. Less permission is given to choose and he is involved in
relationships devoid of erotic love.
⠀⠀⠀Conservation uses seduction to achieve the first village. Of course, she wants to be
laid-back , but in a “different way”. It is not sold as an erotic object but as a pill rejuvenating,
which promises: “With me you will never get bored”. In exchange, she receives in perpetuity the
title of princess de la casao the Mommy’s right eye.
⠀⠀⠀The Social E2 is active in conquest, but less passionate than the sexual one, since his
purpose is not so much to be dislodged but to obtain ner power through your love relationship.
⠀⠀⠀His seduction is directed at the group, when what he really needs needed is intimacy, and
from the intellectual, trying to reproduce the place of power that I hold as a child. For this it
offers protection, contacts, advice ... adopting an attitude of superiority.
⠀⠀⠀So the Conservation seduces to receive, the Sexual them to share and the Socials to give.
⠀⠀⠀The Two is among the most narcissistic characters. With his fantasies of great personal
importance, a concept of himself as a special person, who actually hides a total lack of
confidence in their own worth. Self-image excessively inflated covers another devalued one
that, if it emerges, causes an excruciating shame that can lead to despair.
⠀⠀⠀The E2 does not show the deficiencies of it. That would mean appearing vulnerable, that is,
weak, defective, useless, in the eyes of others: a direct path to rejection and abandonment. To
camouflage his humanity dad, he stands before the world haughty and with a special brilliance.
What a skillful actor, he resorts to the mechanism of repression, with which he mutes any need
or emotion that makes you connect with the internal feeling of fraud and lack.
⠀⠀⠀The three subtypes repress, above all, envy. The one who has the most contact with it is the
conservation E2. To hide it, the Two becomes enviable and seems to offer a generosity
shrouded in optimism. Himself, without explicitly asking for anything in return. Thus, his pride
nurtures a sense of superiority (it would be better to call it invulnerability) that does not allow her
to express his weaknesses but rather indicates rightly, through manipulation, whims, a disdain
disguised or hostile rage.
⠀⠀⠀The generosity of the E2 type is inauthentic, since more than to donate what he does is to
flatter to enchant. It depends a lot on the admiration that he arouses, becoming very attentive to
what he gives and gives, taking care of what is good. Consequently, it is unlikely to thank you.
⠀⠀⠀The sexual and social E2s are so full and lucky, they seem immune even to illness or death.
He says Karen Horney, speaking of neurotic pride: “They avoid any thoughts that might harm
their pride. The more significant example is to avoid thinking about death, because the idea of
dying like any other mortal is unbearable for them. The Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde [A Social
E2] is an artistic presentation, ethics of the pride of eternal youth”.
“l was very surprised when I realized that I was getting older; someone like me shouldn’t have
an expiration date”. Adds a woman of this subtype. — Ana Baza.
⠀⠀⠀Conservation Two, on the other hand, needs you to come see him, to be pampered; there’s
a fear of being left alone in his illness. His contacts lack more than the other subtypes. This
adult who goes out into the world as a child feels less capable, more insecure, he devalues
more easily and shows himself more needy. Express more openly the need for him, allowing
himself to claim and protest more than the sexual Two and the social one, more self-sacrificing
and resistant.
⠀⠀⠀When he receives something, the first thing that comes to E2 conservation is that he is
undeserved. He also shares the insatiability with E4: after a whim comes another, and another
... As if there was a monton of pending wishes waiting for the occasion to be satisfied. What he
does not have and what he does not know can be shown as something.
⠀⠀⠀The proud feel a step above the rest, convinced of being important to the other; and they, at
the same time, self-sufficient. Sexuals are the superabundant by excellence. They do not lack
anything; what’s more, they have everything the other needs, like the mamma with the big tits
full of milk, to feed us all and have us trapped; how could a still full, wonderful and special
person need something or someone? He seduces who has, not who needs, and he will not
allow himself to bring a crack in that image of overabundance so well samblada.
⠀⠀⠀The sexual pride seeks to be someone through love life. Look at his anguish being
irreplaceable. His feeling of importance tancia feeds on the pleasure she gives. The conqueror
and the femme fatale are the characters of a passion for conquest that goes beyond fall in love
or fall in love; what excites him is being indispensable to him object of desire.
⠀⠀⠀The Sexual E2 covers his miseries very well with seduction. Intellectually, to adapt to what
the other wants, you can interact with something, but always in a superficial way. Wake up many
you envy because he seems to achieve everything he sets his mind to ... but also it also fails.
Now that is covered up by his fantasy or his attilondon, so that others can only see the light part.
Minosa of the facade.
⠀⠀⠀The Social E2, in short, is the subtype that establishes the least contact with the lack. He
anesthetizes himself by throwing himself into action. Like the Sietes, he has a dense schedule
full of activities, which makes him feel essential. Like the other subtypes, it takes refuge in
fantasia; where appropriate, laying out plans, coordinating projects or making contacts.
⠀⠀⠀He likes to feel like the director of an eight-ring circus. To E2 Social, that there’re problems
to solve gives meaning to your life and allows you to disconnect from your needs. The
maddened rhythm to who submits keeps the feeling of being insufficient under control and, if for
some reason he falls ill or fails, he locks himself at home until the storm passes with hardly
anyone knowing their situation.
⠀⠀⠀The Two harbors the intimate conviction of a radical lack of value, and that is what triggers
the compensatory impulse of the order. Gullo, which inhibits envy. In order to keep the fragile
walk My journey of pride, you must act to receive continual rewards. The sexual subtype finds
them mainly in relationships sentimental. The Social obtains its triumphs in other areas.
“Joy became an unfathomable well of sadness and disappointment. Later I realized that the
main perception was that neither emotionality hadn’t changed. I didn’t feel any more loved, even
congratulated; I did not feel more valid although I did feel more famous. The unconscious
expectations deposited were that my world of insecure Rity, inferiority and lack of esteem would
have ended and it was not like that”. — TONI AGUILAR
⠀⠀⠀Where the E2 navigats best is in reverie. Fantasy is the strategy that all three subtypes use
as a refuge from pain and frustration. Since he was little he has needed to escape from a mess
the emotional world that no one helped him to structure or give exit. He has learned to create a
reality tailored to his needs, more appealing that the one you get out the door or even in your
own home, developing a great ability to disconnect. Color any want failure or loss as something
unimportant ends in depression more or less covertly.
⠀⠀⠀The princess imagines that the whole kingdom has realized what unique and wonderful that
it is, in a fairy tale where all its descos are fulfilled. The queen dreams that she is the sublime
lover, mother, daughter and partner, who they adore unconditionally. And the Empress delights
in knowing herself magnanimous and imagining great works that will be applauded for their
creativity.
⠀⠀⠀Only the emotion counts, then. Minus the guilt. That’s just the Experimental. If anything, a
narcissistic shame of: How not someone like me could.
⠀⠀⠀But all three subtypes deny what they feel, blame others of their discomfort and hide when
they feel vulnerable. With the E2 conservation it is not easy to know what happens to him
because he lives on the surface of his emotional world, in constant denial of the pain and
aggression. He is the most crybaby, but he gives himself the least permission to show your
anger and, when you go out, it is in the form of complaints, irritability and tantrums. Although he
is very susceptible, it is difficult for him to connect with external aggressions; he reacts late.
⠀⠀⠀Sexual and social do have a more direct contact with the rage, being able to stage
disproportionate tragicomic situations nothing and one hundred percent manipulative.
“I call it the “vaudeville”. Life is a theater, a game where hardly there are limits and where
emotions, if they are not intense and dramatized, they don’t seem authentic; they simply are not.
This waste of energy and dishonesty wears out the relationship with the other.” — ANA BAZA
⠀⠀⠀The Two sexual is the most theatrical and intense. You allow yourself to get angry and react
quickly to external aggression. The social Two is more rigid and stiff. Save more forms than
sexual, especially in public, and when it finally explodes, it does so from a position of power that
ensures success. He can then be ironic, cruel or ruthless, with himself and with others.
⠀⠀⠀“I feel like I have great masochistic defenses, giving me things so as not to feel what is
painful and difficult for me; until in the end I connect with that rage and explode and from
disproportionate and excessive. So much so that I can be very hurtful and I don’t see the other
at all. There I’m ashamed of myself for having reacted that way, and I start to suffer for the
image that I project. (The great difference with the E8 is just that, he does not regret or feel that
judgment internal against himself)”. — MONICA ANGULO
⠀⠀⠀The Social E2 is the most intellectual of the proud. To go out into the world and succeed, to
be a leader, you need to use your mind, in order to organize, create strategies and make
decisions, leaving aside the emotional warmth. It inhibits your emotions more, then, than the
rest of subtypes.
⠀⠀⠀The Sexual E2 is the most clearly anti-intellectual subtype. In its life there is no room for
reason. It dispenses with the intellectual; arrives even to despise him, since his feeling is the
most important thing. Flees therefore of common reasoning and logic. It’s the most impressive,
provocative and wild. He needs to feel free, he cannot bear the limits of you and love
transgression. In this, as in the search for intensity, it’s very close to E8, becoming destructive or
self-destructive.
⠀⠀⠀Conservation E2 may be more intellectual than sexual, if thinks that this will promote
pampering and attention or guarantee the protection of a loved one. Also in his eagerness to
appear dependent needs to nurture his intellect. But it does not reach the levels of the social E2.
⠀⠀⠀All Twos are emotionally dependent, although each one with his own camouflage. The
conservation E2 is the most dependent, even if she thinks not and shows the world an image of
self-sufficient. Many leave their family with the idea that distance decreases dependency, but it
does not usually work. In fact, he does not know how to maintain relationships without falling
into dependence. That is why it is so difficult for her to form her own family and commit
terseness. This is the difference between sexual and social, which have less fear of pairing and
unpairing.
⠀⠀⠀With the Sexual E2 it’s different. Live each romance as if it were the only and definitive.
Anyway, if it depends on something, it is the love and feeling loved.
⠀⠀⠀Social organizations, for their part, are intolerant of any limitations, their own or someone
else’s, and they act from counterdependency, insofar as they that love does not interest them
too much.
◯ ◦ To responsibility:
⠀⠀⠀None of the three subtypes are attracted to ordinary things, and everyday responsibilities
are very boring. Each one in his own way seeks that life has a more intense tone, bright and
quirky.
⠀⠀⠀E2 Conservation, because of its attachment to the infantile, is the least responsible for all
three. He has been quite protected as a child. When asked for something, he tends to think “I
can’t”, “I don’t know how to do it”, “I’m too busy”, or “I’m exhausted”. He overflows, instead of
energy for pleasant things.
⠀⠀⠀The Sexual E2, on the other hand, with its overabundance, sells better your ability to take
responsibility, and shows more willingness to care and sacrifice for others.
⠀⠀⠀Due to its desire for power and to dominate groups, the Social E2 is the most responsible
and hard-working, and assumes high responsibilities in the diverses areas of his life. For that he
needs to be extremely demanding people, rigid and controlling.
⠀⠀⠀Another trait that defines the proud, devoid of limits and given to excesses, is his taste for
freedom. What he really wants is to be pleased. That is, do what he wants, when he wants, with
whom he wants and how he wants. He calls that freedom.
◯ ◦ Permissiveness:
⠀⠀⠀The three subtypes are rigid and, in their polarity, permissive, you and self-indulgent with
your failures or forgetfulness. The Social E2 shows itself condescendingly with the mistakes of
others, but only as a manipulative strategy. And with himself, he can go from a high demand to
the absolute lack of awareness of his responsibility.
“I can go from excess workload and stress to a clear: I’m unemployed and no I don’t even make
the egg ... because I need it. All very polarized. Still, there’s more expensive difficulty in
stopping”. — MONICA ANGULO
⠀⠀⠀The Conservation E2 is very flexible in your everyday life. Does not give importance where
you leave the rags in the kitchen and accept when al. they are moved around, since he highly
values the freedom of He tries to let others do what he wants with his seduction childish,
sweetness and meekness, but you need to make sure you have bation; that is, what he wants is
also what the other wants, laugh, and he’s very frustrated if he pouts at him.
⠀⠀⠀The Sexual E2 is the most permissive, but also the fastest can pass to the demand and
demand of great sacrifices for the other to demonstrate his unconditionality.
◯ ◦ Make to be
⠀⠀⠀The three subtypes are characterized by being dynamic. The Conservation 2 is the one that
focuses the most on doing for the other, I know about your self-care. It’s also the one that least
focuses on its activities. He may know where he would like to go but is entertained by the road.
⠀⠀⠀The sexual are the most emotional among the emotional and, although they appear electric,
they move only when there’s an object. Clear in sight, because the intense emotionality with
which everything impregnates them exhausts them. At work they do what they do, but I know
they focus on what they like, they get lost in the details and they look worth more than content.
⠀⠀⠀The Social E2 is the most disciplined but, at times, fickle. Use your mind to spot
opportunities and quickly move on to specify. Too bad I can’t do everything I know compromises.
◯ ◦ Ambition
⠀⠀⠀The conservation person seeks power through the other, that is, employs his efforts to
conquer the figure of power, rather than wanting to come to power by herself. That is the
difference from the Social E2 colder, stronger.
⠀⠀⠀Conservation Two first of all prefers to ensure a comfortable life, fashion, pleasure and
avoid the efforts that would take a lot power or be very important. Yet the ambition remains, and
takes the form of demand, especially with others. Your process must always be ascending, and
if not, you will let the fantasy make you think yes.
◯ ◦ Maternity
⠀⠀⠀Sexual E2 is the most maternal. She’s usually involved in relationships of much madness,
permissiveness and impulse, more focused on their con. He likes his children, but displays
generosity.
⠀⠀⠀The Conservation E2 is more of a playing mother. She can live like her friend and it takes a
lot for her to live as a grown mother. Give much but wait even more (recognition and love). Be
distressed by how, as her children grow up, she loses importance.
⠀⠀⠀The Social E2 gives the appearance of being bigger, more mature. She maintains an image
of almighty in front of her children so that they depend on her and need her presence more
forcefully. She’s a mother who shines, who “gives herself to the world”.
1. SOCIAL TWO
⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝
﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋
⠀⠀⠀The feeling of belonging to family, group or tribe is a core and conflicting aspect in all social
subtypes. Social E2 is no exception. This ambitious man is an orphan seeking the necessary
and legitimate place he was not allowed to occupy as a child. Faced with the difficulty of
developing a positive, identifying bond with a secure father or mother figure, he crystallizes his
fear and anger into animosity. In the absence of a figure to look up to and feel valued by, he will
come to supplant her. Thus, the “son of none” will seek to be the “father of all”.
⠀⠀⠀Social E2 will be benevolent and generous as long as he does not feel challenged. But he is
very thin-skin, and any sign that makes him think he doesn’t have absolute control over others
will make him insecure and precipitate a crisis of authoritarianism, as well as a conquering and
invasive reaction.
⠀⠀⠀With a strong sense of revenge, he will try, throughout his life, to conquer what he considers
to be his rightful place as a leader at the top of society. His ambition is fed by a competitive and
destructive spirit that he directs against the source of his feelings of inadequacy and self-hatred.
He has swallowed the disappointment of an overbearing father or a dissatisfied mother, and
today he spews this same frustration at others.
⠀⠀⠀When we allude to the word that gives name to this subtype, dominance, territorialism
“empress” or “emperor”, we speak of authority, leadership and protection. And also of tyranny,
abuse, absolutism and disproportion. Various aspects that draw, in short, a scene presided over
by a marked vertical vision of social relations.
⠀⠀⠀Among the proud, the social subtype makes himself known by occupying space with his
body, with his voice, with his gestures, and with a presence that conveys security and
conviction. He is a histrionic simile, so he adds a serious countenance to his appearance, as of
concern and commitment; the attitude of someone very mature, who knows what to do and what
to do. At times he seems to have the gift of a seer, given his vehemence, and seems to be
carrying a heavy load, albeit with a selfless posture.
⠀⠀⠀Social E2 focuses on reproducing the role and bond he developed at home as a child with
his family in the social relationships he establishes in the world. He wants everyone, not just his
family or friends, to attach a personal importance to him that gives him the role of a reference
person in their lives.
⠀⠀⠀Social E2 took a place near her elders very early on, and from then on he was seen as
someone important in family life, but not as a child. She does not have the experience of having
been a child. Wearing heels too big for her, she was admired by her mother and father for what
she did and not for what she was. Deprived, in turn, of the fraternal world, she does not know
how to relate to her peers except in competition or above, and she will follow the game of
triangulations that is established with the parental system, from early childhood, in the rest of
her relationships, polarizing them into good and bad, or with me or against me.
⠀⠀⠀The confusion that has been made with roles in the family system permeates his
relationships as an adult, which he contemplates from a hierarchical perspective. Social E2
stratifies people into spheres of influence and power, such that he cannot establish affective
bonds, but rather strategic and practical ones. It ranks people based on how high they are on
the organizational chart of the “institution”, real or imagined, in question. What in a company
would be the president, CEO, etc. he applies to the group of friends, the social groups, or the
family.
⠀⠀⠀He confuses a person’s status with his personal value; he neither sees the other nor sees
himself. He confuses doing with being, and only what he can show gives him entity. He can be
said to be the least empathic of the Two, with his high use of strategy and organization. The
frontal and prefrontal lobe functions are most accessible to him: planning, problem solving, error
control, decision making, social cognition, and working memory.
⠀⠀⠀The emperor throws his pride into the social convinced that he is far more qualified than the
others to direct, plan or develop any project or activity that arises. The Social E2 needs, like all
prides, recognition; specifically, that which comes from the groups. Paradoxically, inside there is
an intense self-devaluation and a deep feeling of loneliness. He believes he has much to
contribute and say, so he often fantasizes about the impact of his social participation and his
place.
⠀⠀⠀He believes he has a lot to contribute and say, which is why he often fantasizes about the
impact of his social participation and his place in the world, considering that he leaves others
through his actions and opinions. He likes to think of himself as a very important and
fundamental part of things. In his narcissism, he needs to feel at the center of the scene: he
doesn’t care about not being ridiculous, the essential thing is not to be ignored.
⠀⠀⠀So he has an image of himself, very close to reality, of a valid, competent, committed
person with great capacity for work; but his difficulty with boundaries prevented him from
knowing when to stop, and he is very demanding of himself; not even the illness can stop him,
unless he ends up in the hospital. He needs someone with authority to impose and fully justify
the need to take care of himself, because his crazy idea of over-abundance prevents him from
accepting that he has reached his limit.
⠀⠀⠀At the same time, he believes himself fit for command, although it cyclically ends in failure,
rarely acknowledged. Once again, his confusion of roles places him in an ambivalent manner in
relation to his subordinates, whom he treats as equals, allying himself to the fraternal system.
But when he has to exercise authority he has to position himself as a father, and nobody likes to
be bossed around by a brother who acts like a father.
⠀⠀⠀He tries, in his false abundance, to satisfy everyone and, coupled with his inability to
delegate certain matters and fulfill everything he promises, he is forced to leave or be expelled.
“When I held a position of authority in a water company, I put an emphasis on strong yet
forgiving leadership, which took a lot of effort for me to be able to listen and try to make
everyone on the team happy. I exhausted myself trying to reach consensus, promising more
than I could deliver, giving the requests that came more value than I could sustain. She wanted
to be the most loved “boss”, despite being in a power system where she had little room for
freedom. At the same time, she wished to gain the esteem of those in the highest positions; and
without marme. In short, I wanted to be loved by everyone, to please everyone, and instead I
felt very alone”. — ALBA ARENA
⠀⠀⠀He gets involved and committed, showing himself to be very conscientious and efficient in
all the projects he starts. However, it is very difficult for him to work in a team: he is a despot
with the other and with himself.
⠀⠀⠀The self-indulgence so characteristic of the proud one manifests itself in Social E2 through
behaviors that can work as anxiolytics, such as sex, food, media, or sports. They are his way of
disconnecting from self-indulgence.
“I demand so much of myself: to do many things, to do them well, to know and be in everything,
to miss nothing ... and with such passion, when something doesn't turn out the way I’d like it to,
instead of self-criticizing and analyzing why (those who charge a lot don’t squeeze a lot, how
come I need to do so much ...) I become self-indulgent and tell myself there’s nothing wrong and
pat myself on the back. It’s hard for me to see my mistakes, and before I admit that I might
make them, I already give myself absolution”. — ANA GONZÁLEZ TEJERA
⠀⠀⠀Social E2 justifies this self-indulgence from a supposed privilege derived from how much
everything he gives is worth. But it is also, we insist, where abandonment is allowed, as the only
way to rest, to escape the control and demand of the inner father.
“If I have to get up for a meeting at five in the morning, I do it without question. On the other
hand, if I have to get up at eight o’clock for any matter related to my personal care, I will find a
thousand excuses to put it off”. — FRESIA NORA ROBLEDO POMA
⠀⠀⠀Social E2 shows a high intolerance to frustration and generates helplessness so that your
projects or ambitions do not prosper. If he fails, he feels anything from annoyed to furious, and
will blame the other person or the situation for it, not being able to recognize his share of
responsibility or the excess of the project. He can easily be ruthless with the people under his
responsibility, even if he thinks he is an understanding, fair and loving boss.
“I was the coordinator of a team of seven people. The atmosphere and relationships with the
rest were increasingly complicated, but I was convinced that the problem was the team and that
I was misunderstood despite all the efforts I made for them. One day in a meeting, one of the
educators, whom I considered lazy, was sharing an intervention that she had not done as I had
instructed her. Suddenly I looked at her very angrily and said, raising my voice: “Next time I’m
going to blow your head off”. I was so angry. Only when I looked away and saw the expressions
on the faces of my companions, between horror and anger, did I have some awareness of what
I had done, but of course I didn’t give it the slightest thought; I saw no excess or
disproportionality”. — Ana Baza
⠀⠀⠀One of your abilities is, using your empathy, to adopt the appearance, gestures, and speech
of the one you are trying to attract at every moment. You can abuse others by manipulating
them to accomplish tasks that do not interest you. To do this, you surround yourself with the
best and sell them on the idea, smear them with credentials and the various advantages they
will gain. They believe it is a privilege to take on the task, and meanwhile, the Social E2 is
building his network of collaborators who do this “thankless” work for him, and so he can devote
himself to the more creative part, the organization, the social relationships, or imagining new
projects.
⠀⠀⠀He usually works long hours and is so seriously involved that he tyrannizes and enslaves
the other, without taking into account the care of personal relationships. He wants others to
adhere to him as an undisputed leader, demanding absolute loyalty and dedication from his
subordinates and collaborators, as well as a willingness to match his own. This usually results in
a frenetic pace, which many people are unwilling or unable to afford. He is intolerant of the
limitations of others, living as an uncomfortable obstacle, so he constantly tries to correct and
improve the other. He tends to objectify the people with whom he collaborates, reducing the
relationship to an uncomfortable procedure, which he is necessary with, in order to be able to
use the other in the realization of his plans. He feels that others, family, partner, subordinates,
etc. They are an extension of himself, so they have to appear as competent and brilliant as he
is.
⠀⠀⠀He is very skilled at assessing the importance and capabilities of each person in a structure,
whether in his social or work world, he pays no attention to those he perceives on the lower
rungs of the pyramid unless he finds it useful to establish bonds of interest with them. For
example, you may have a very good relationship with the secretarial or janitorial staff of a
company.
⠀⠀⠀With the few that you recognize as authorities, you use a seductive strategy, and when you
are recognized by them, you interpret it as a fair recognition, as something that is due to you for
all that you do and how you solve it. It’s easy for him to visualize himself and present himself as
the architect of the successes, even if it is a team effort. If this recognition does not occur, he
trivializes it, justifying it as a sign of mediocrity or envy on the part of authority.
⠀⠀⠀And with his equals, since he has never been part of the fraternal subsystem, he
establishes competitive relations from a self-designated superiority, condescending and
paternalistic, which ends up leaving him very lonely.
⠀⠀⠀Deep down, and following his childhood pattern, E2 seeks to be close to authority, to the
elders, which is his natural place of reference. However, although neurotically he seeks power
and even replaces the leader, reality tells him that this is not what calms his ambition. What he
really wants is to find a family where he is recognized through unconditional love and
acceptance. Ultimately, this domineering, counter-dependent character is looking for someone
to finally protect and care for him.
⠀⠀⠀He even shows no scruples in achieving what he aspires to, and to this end establishes
complicit relationships, including bribery, blackmail, mutual aid out of interest, or temporary
alliances. Of course, this, barring criminal maneuvers, can be seen as logical and reasonable in
an attempt to satisfy one’s own desires, but in Social E2 the motivation will be selfish and devoid
of any compassionate or caring nuance, even though he believes it’s for the common good. The
ambitious one owes and serves only himself. His generosity is part of his seductive and
interesting facade. And he ends up receiving much more than he gave. Besides the fact that
debts with him are hardly ever canceled, and that he charges a lot for the “favors” he may have
lavished on them at the time.
⠀⠀⠀Being a creditor puts the Social E2 in a privileged place to have influence over the other and
use him for his plans. And he is extremely interested in maintaining this debt for two reasons.
The first, because it thereby demonstrates that he does not need what he is owed, which
reinforces his false superabundance. The second, because it is an element of control and
dominance.
⠀⠀⠀The endless expansion of power, influence, and ability to which she devotes herself body
and soul can be seen as an attempt to free herself from those shackles that angrily threaten to
suffocate her until they disappear.
⠀⠀⠀The feeling of being small, smaller than the other, infinitely smaller, of being the weak one,
the dependent one, the needy one, causes an anticipatory anguish to paralyze her facing only
two possibilities: either she is on top, and that gives her security, or she is down, and that leads
to being subjugated, to being abused, and finally to disappear. The Social Two chooses very
early on to survive, and in order to do so, it needs to adopt an “oops” position in everything that
concerns it.
⠀⠀⠀It cannot receive; it does not know. Above all, a gift. If he receives something, he thinks it is
in payment for a favor he has done, or that something will be asked of him. And if he hasn’t
done anything before, he will suspect or think that it is a payment for the benefits the other gets
from his friendship. This character keeps a very detailed accounting of favors, payments,
collections and debts, in a notebook where he writes down the “good deeds”, even those that
were not asked for.
⠀⠀⠀Feeling in need is a Social E2 synonymous with weakness, with danger. Being small
terrifies him because he has never been loved as a boy, as a girl, nor has he been recognized in
his weakness or vulnerability except to be used and abused.
“For the emperor, the empress, to ask is the public and explicit recognition of their incapacity,
and to be helped is humiliating. And to be one without having asked, which is very unlikely, is
already an insult. When he is discouraged, defeated, depressed or absent, he takes refuge in
his home and gives no sign of what is happening to him until he pulls himself together and
returns to the stage. I was on the couch in my house with a pretty serious depression; only my
immediate family knew about it. He didn't go out or talk to anyone. Who would he call? I didn't
think anyone would have a clue how to help me.” — ANA BAZA
⠀⠀⠀She harbors the irrational thought that if she puts herself in someone else's hands, she will
be betrayed and may perish emotionally. It is a mistrust that originates in the relationship with
the mother and that generalizes to life; hence her skepticism in receiving without giving anything
in return and her attitude of constant arrogance in the face of her own vulnerability or limitations.
To maintain this autarky, one starts from the premise that he doesn't need anyone. Two socials
are experts at putting others down if they are not useful for them to achieve their goals. In this
way, he gets few people to approach him, which confirms his self-sufficiency, but also his
orphanhood. Paradoxically, when there is a problem, they tend to turn to him, which
narcissistically compensates their feeling of loneliness.
⠀⠀⠀To be a reference person, in what it considers its territory, is the desire that makes the E2
Social vibrate. To achieve this, he has developed a strategic mind, the ability to influence, and
an opportunistic and always alert intelligence. But he also needed to banish some
characteristics of any human being such as compassion, tenderness, to allow himself to make
mistakes, or, what this subtype fears the most: love, which baffles him and, at the same time, is
the only thing that can cure him. One could say that Social E2 buried, or rather, banished his
heart, his childhood and his humanity after being commissioned to become an adult in early
childhood.
⠀⠀⠀One can say that the social subtype is the proudest among the proud. It does not fantasize
about regaining the warmth of its father or mother, although from them it has learned to feel like
“the chosen one”; nor is it content to captivate a few men or women. Social E2 aspires to
conquer territories, groups, and the whole world if it gets lost. Cleopatra, Napoleon, Eva Peron,
Alexander the Great or Lucifer are examples of this charismatic, trickster and crowd-seducer
subtype. Says Karen Horney, defining such expansive characters: “It’s dedicated to
self-glorification, proud endeavors, vengeful triumphs, and domination of life through intelligence
and willpower as a means of bringing success. Practice your idealized self.”
⠀⠀⠀Social boy E2 felt worthy of being watched with love. However, when he was no longer
useful to his mother or father, or inconvenient for any reason, he was pushed away with
gestures and body language full of contempt, which made him feel humiliated. It is from this
downward movement that the pride and ambition to regain the lost dignity through recognition
and to become again, and in all scenarios, that reference person who was loved
“unconditionally” is born.
“I remember that flattery, feeling different and being the chosen one lived with contempt and
humiliation. I had to do my best to remain the chosen one and maintain my position in the family.
The word “pride” literally came up to forget the humiliations and overcome that, drawing strength
from weakness to win my parents over again. It’s as if humiliation threw me into a pit from which
I come out giving everything, thanks to pride”. — ROSA USELETI
⠀⠀⠀Claudio Naranjo defines social as the most intellectual of the Two. Although, like the other
subtypes, he uses emotionalization as his main defense, in his case he represses his emotions
and can be more disciplined because he puts the strategic ambition of conquest in the
foreground. Only an illness or a major failure at work level would put him in touch with his
physical limits and a “slight” feeling of vulnerability.
⠀⠀⠀This unbridled action, this passion for purpose disguises itself as ambition and focuses on
the achievement of goals, territories or groups; all as part of the desperate search for a place in
the world to repay what was not given to him in his own right in his family and to escape the cold
emptiness he would come into contact with if he stopped. Social E2 was not seen for who he
was, but rather for his usefulness in supporting and satisfying one or both parents.
⠀⠀⠀He has played the role of confidant, knowledgeable about information that is not appropriate
to his evolutionary moment. He has already played the role of partner to one of his two parents,
according to gender, starting to compete early with his father. In the case of women, in
adolescence they face head-on the one who could have been their idol, to usurp their role as
“father” of the family.
⠀⠀⠀It has been the unconditional support of his mother. She was the one that one of her parents
wanted to shine for, the one who was going to save the family, and it is common that she has
been used as a tool for attack and blackmail among the adults. However, there is one role he
could not play: that of being a boy, a girl. This experience is what brings him closer to and
shares him with E3 and E8, the two powerful enneatypes of the triad of action, in the personality
enneagram. There was no childhood beyond the age of seven or eight.
⠀⠀⠀In the absence of boundaries, protection, or emotional support from one or both parents,
they survive by growing up prematurely to occupy a place of importance and reference within
the parenting system. They are usually isolated from the fraternal subsystem, as they are
somehow denied or renounced relationships with their peers. The absence of a place of his
own, the mandate of self-sufficiency, and a sticky feeling of loneliness will accompany him
throughout his life and drive him to chase glory.
⠀⠀⠀What distresses Social E2 the most is the contact, on the few times he is allowed, with the
underlying states of disability and depression. The idea that if he falls he might die accompanies
him recurrently in his nightmares. This worry stems from the fact that he was not protected or
supported in his emotional falls as a child; and it stayed with him the feeling that he might perish
without anyone remembering or caring for him. In adulthood, he will be suspicious if anyone
cares for him, and, driven to the extreme, he will succumb rather than ask for help. To avoid
contact with this helplessness and calm his anguish, he put his body and head in the service of
strategy and action, banishing his restless heart, which is as inconvenient as having to attend to
his most basic needs, in love without profit.
⠀⠀⠀When she walks down the street it is easy for them to make way for her strong, natural and
graceful gait at the same time. He has an arrogant presence, like someone who knows he owns
the land he steps on and gives the image, like a peacock, of being someone who is “important,
regardless of the context in which it takes place.”
⠀⠀⠀Oscar Wilde is a good example of this subtype, a modern man, in the style of the
Renaissance man in his curious and bucolic openness, and somewhat baroque in his
expression. Contemporary with his time, he likes art and beauty in any of its forms. A
well-connected intellectual surrounded by influential people of his time. Funny, perceptive, witty,
and with a wide network of contacts, he is usually well informed and takes care of his personal
appearance, which he easily adapts according to his purposes.
⠀⠀⠀As chameleonic as E3, however, E2 Social uses his appearance more as a tool to achieve
his goals than as part of an image. He takes advantage of his strategic adaptability and
empathy to identify the defining signs of the different groups with whom he interacts. He subtly
transforms his appearance, but without losing his identity or desire to stand out, and integrates
himself into the group he is interested in, managing to be seen and admired for the value he
adds to the group by his mere presence.
⠀⠀⠀He’s an opportunist who knows how to drink from different sources and make an idea or
project his own. He is not content to copy what others have: he takes what he needs and
combines it with other elements, in a creative way, which gives an innovative result. He is an
expert at patchwork from the different stimuli he receives and, at the same time, giving a kind of
light that makes any company seem possible.
⠀⠀⠀Like Napoleon, the last great conqueror. Only a “reckless” like him, a narcissist driven mad
by his compulsive desire for “more and more”, could conquer almost impossible territories:
eleven countries, including half of Russia, and at a time when the media was not the proper for
such an enterprise. Social E2 are people who, despite being considered a fraud internally, rely
on a high self-confidence, compulsively seeking any opportunity to conquer the masses, like
Elvis Presley, Truman Capote or Eva Perón, a magnificent example of how a Social E2 knows
how to sublimate his ambition: Everything for the people.
⠀⠀⠀Cleopatra, Julius Caesar, Napoleon or Alexander the Great have something in common:
being great conquerors of masses, of territories. Creators of empires, their legacy survived
them, despite the remoteness of the time in which they lived.
⠀⠀⠀In all their biographies we can see points in common, as well as aspects of character that
make them share a subtype:
⠀⠀⠀Social E2 believes he can do what he undertakes better than anyone else. He does not
admit orders, and even less in those matters that he believes belong to it. Thus, he is able to
stand up against established power, arguing that it is for the common good. Both Napoleon and
Julius Caesar proclaimed themselves emperors thinking that only they knew what the people
needed, but they ended up assuming absolute power, despite having fought precisely against it
when another held it. Something reminiscent of usurping one's father's place in childhood.
⠀⠀⠀When a rule is inconvenient or an obstacle to achieving his goals, the Social E2 ignores it or
adjusts it to his needs, even creating new ones with the desire that they be universal. He does
not value doing something incorrect, but necessary, because the end justifies the means. He
naturally applies the saying that the road to hell is paved with good intentions, for he knows how
to justify any act in the pursuit of a common good goal.
⠀⠀⠀A great ambitious person always wants to change the world and make it a better place for
the underdog: “I’m willing to resort to anything, to submit to anything, for the good of all people”.
— JULIO CESAR
“I didn’t want or want anything for myself. My glory is and always will be the coat of arms of
Perón and the flag of my people, and although I have left traces of my life along the way, I know
that you will take my name and carry it as the flag of victory. [...] If this city asked me for my life, I
would give it to them singing, because the happiness of a single shirtless man is worth more
than my entire life”. — EVITA
“I have a heart, but a sovereign's heart; I do not pity the tears of a duchess, but I’m affected by
the ills of the people”. — NAPOLÉON
⠀⠀⠀He’s certain that he is capable of accomplishing everything he sets his mind to in life and
plans great undertakings for himself and the world. This confidence in his personal resources
and his ability to envision gives him the conviction that he knows how to convey his passion
when he believes in something. He takes risks and is an innovator in his field, be it music,
literature, or war. On the other hand, he is a great strategist and has the discipline and tenacity
to achieve the impossible, as he undertakes actions that others can't even imagine.
⠀⠀⠀He resorts to whatever it takes to achieve what he aspires to; he doesn’t care about the
price to pay or the consequences to himself or others. He has big plans for himself and knows
how to take any opportunity to create something new or to bounce back from possible failure.
However, he is a conqueror and needs the group to find support and for his company to be
socially recognized.
⠀⠀⠀Conquest gives him the adrenaline he needs to feel alive. He is addicted to the excitement
of the power, influence, and status they carry. What he can't do is stay to keep what he has
conquered, because it would involve protecting, caring, or getting into a routine that doesn’t last
long. Social E2 needs to go hook one conquest after another and leave the care of what has
been conquered to others.
⠀⠀⠀He is insatiable; rarely or only for a short time is he satisfied with what has been achieved.
His ambition drives him relentlessly to keep chasing the impossible. His inability to see and
accept the limits, his own and those of others, leads him to irremediable failure. Just like Julius
Caesar or Napoleon, he intends to go so far that his own excess of wanting to be God leads
him, in the same fall as Lucifer, to failure.
⠀⠀⠀The word that best defines the neurotic need of the Social E2 is, therefore, ambition.
Etymologically, it is interesting to follow the trail of other related words that could explain the
genesis of this subtype: dignity and humiliation.
⠀⠀⠀The word ‘ambition’ contains two meanings. In both, one observes the desire to achieve
something with vehemence; which puts us directly in touch with the intensity and proactivity of
this character and his vital “going for it” movement, as Claudio Naranjo points out, following
Karen Horney: The so-called E2 is a surprisingly expansive example, that is, let’s say, that
approaches conflicting situations through pleasure and power and giving up [...] and we would
say that the social subtype is the most antagonistic.
⠀⠀⠀Sticking with this term, the ambition of E2 Social is not prioritized by wealth or image, as in
E3 Social, but more specifically the passion to “be more, be more, do more”. This drive for “the
most” gives him back a sense of meaning in life. If he were to stop his achievement, he would
have to come into contact with his lack: an absence of himself, an emptiness he cannot bear.
And he would also lose hope of being loved and valued. To be one among many would be like
not existing, not having a place in the world.
⠀⠀⠀It’s the passion, specifically, of being someone important to turn to, a reference. If we look
more closely, what he really wants is to have dignity, to be worthy of being loved, to be worthy of
love. However, he does not direct this search toward the authentic value that dignity holds deep
within the human being, but diverts it, believing that it resides in being confirmed by the world,
thanks to his great deeds. Following this thread we come across two of the meanings of the
word ‘humiliate’ ‘to hurt someone’s self-esteem or dignity and to go through a situation where
the person suffers some harm’. This is the experience that will give rise to the formation of this
character.
⠀⠀⠀When a human being is born, he knows that he is complete and with full capacity to love
and be loved. The environment of Social E2 reassures the child that he is worthy of being
looked at with love, because it considers him a special being, conveys to him that he is going to
do something important; which in turn keeps his self-concept and self-esteem high.
⠀⠀⠀However, something interrupts this nirvana; the mother, especially, is “absent” or looks away
somehow. Perhaps only because, upon ceasing to be a child, that unconditional gaze is no
longer, but what the Social E2 experiences is that a perverse game begins, where he is the
custodian of high expectations and responsibilities beyond his evolving possibilities. This gives
him overwhelming confidence in his possibilities, but at the same time de-energizes you and
cyclically leads you into states of stress or depression. In exchange, he receives something he
will never stop fighting for: a place of power within the system.
⠀⠀⠀In parallel, another family dynamic feeds the child’s uncertainty about what his place really
is, which will motivate him in the future to gain one in his own right within the groups. From this
place of reference and parity granted to him, he feels, by being treated again as the child he is,
the humiliation of having been “degraded”, deceived, betrayed. This expulsion from the place of
importance, this ambivalence about where he is placed by the significant adults, is experienced
as the primordial humiliation.
⠀⠀⠀When the girl approaches her mother in those high heels, proud and self-confident, the
mother, who doesn't need her at that moment, dismissively pushes her away as if she were
more than just someone untoward. These are the first experiences with shame, humiliation, and
feelings of fraud.
⠀⠀⠀Coming into contact with his inadequacy, the future Social 2 child neutralizes this by raising
his chin and personal goals to show that he is self-sufficient and skilled in whatever he
undertakes. As an adult, he will aspire to rediscover this “primary unconditional” love in the
groups he tries to conquer, confusing territory and love.
⠀⠀⠀Paradoxically, when love strikes him, Social E2 is suspicious and unable to surrender or
show what he considers a weakness: his vulnerability and need for the other. When he
considers that he is not loved or that this love is not proportional to what he expects, he feels
betrayed and cuts the person, the authority or the whole group off; you may also leave without
clarifying or asking what happened.
⠀⠀⠀Like all narcissists, the Social E2 carefully and secretly hides, if he is aware of it, his
shortcomings, his failures and, above all, the emptiness that accompanies him. Thus he ends
up in a circular movement between success and failure, between anxiety and depression. As
will be reported in the chapter on childhood, Social E2 was able to suffer depressions of the
anaclitic type as a child and introjective type as an adult.
“The dreaded scene is that they'll abandon me, that I'm not worth it... that I can’t solve other
people’s lives. I sell myself inflated; I create expectations that then weigh me down because I
feel there isn't much in me. It hurts to see how I despise what I have, how I devalue myself by
not always being thoughtful and witty. I see the colorful cellophane I created; it's worn out, like
an old plastic bottle; underneath you can barely see something small and square: it’s a bar of
soap.” — ANA BAZA
⠀⠀⠀Social E2 lives with the permanent tension of the distance between his narcissistic
aspirations and reality. It’s also about someone with low frustration tolerance, which causes a
collapse in his sense of omnipotence. Faced with this imbalance, there are two possible
outcomes: either anger against the other or as self-aggression, both based, as Kohut says, on
experiences of humiliation or depression.
⠀⠀⠀According to Blatt, narcissists subject themselves to constant scrutiny and exhibit such a
permanent fear of criticism that their depression in adulthood will be introjective: feelings of
worthlessness, inferiority, failure, and shame, mixed with harsh self-criticism. These are, and
this is the most significant, depressions that are difficult to detect, because in their speech it is
difficult to notice that they feel so defeated. It is common for them to be unaware that they have
experienced depressive episodes or to isolate themselves until they recover.
⠀⠀⠀Social E2 is disconnected from his needs and self-care because he associates contact with
his inner child with being humiliated and not being held by anyone.
“I felt a lot of sadness, although I never conceived of “depression”. Among other things, because
I did not allow myself to feel the pain and sadness until well into my personal process. I could
feel the sadness and would immediately transform it by getting angry or withdrawn,
disconnecting in some way.” — MONICA ANGULO
⠀⠀⠀One of the axes of narcissism is the high severity of critical consciousness. And one of the
engines of this ambitious man is precisely a severe and persecuting inner father, who torments
him by whispering that he is not enough, that he can achieve more goals, with more
commitments. This voice comes from a constant search for recognition to which he has been
accustomed since childhood.
⠀⠀⠀Social E2 received an inconsistent message as a child, which kept him on anxious alert
because he could be praised or scolded for the same behavior or attitude.
⠀⠀⠀Blind worship can increase your sense of importance. You may feel loved and appreciated
not for who you are, but only to satisfy your parents’ need for adoration, prestige, or power.
⠀⠀⠀And a rigid regimen of perfectionist principles may awaken in him a feeling of inferiority, for
not living up to such demands. Tricks and poor grades at school may be severely reprimanded,
while good behavior or good grades are taken for granted.
⠀⠀⠀Another contradiction to which he has been subjected, and that adds social content to the
experiences of humiliation, is that, in his inner self, the mother shows her disappointment if her
son doesn’t live up to the high ideals that have been generated about him. This is a fundamental
aspect in the formation of narcissistic character. On the other hand, when there are “witnesses”,
both at home and on the street, the message is one of disproportionate praise and blind
confidence in his possibilities, to the point of feeling ashamed of how he is bragged about or
shown off: the humiliation becomes public.
“I felt that I was displayed as an object, a product of my parents. I think this is why it is so easy
for me to “prostitute” myself into seduction and, in fact, remember my parents imitating what
they did to me. Always in search of their lost love. I say “prostitution” as a disloyalty to myself, as
a dishonesty. I ally myself with whoever as long as they admire me, and if I feel the aggression, I
invalidate my feelings and put myself as a punching bag, because as neither I feel nor suffer.” —
MARIO MEDALION SERRANO
⠀⠀⠀In adulthood, Social E2 will pay a high price for this familiar pattern, distrusting anyone who
speaks well of him. Interestingly, although what he wants most is public recognition, he’s easy to
sustain it because he interprets that there is something unreal or false about it, just like when he
was a child. Added to this is the fear of being discovered as a fraud, or of not meeting the
expectations that may be created around him. This is one of the pillars of his difficulty with
intimate relationships and the poor quality of the bonds he establishes.
⠀⠀⠀The term ‘recognition’, so common in the spectrum of Social E2, has an ambivalent, though
not exclusive, meaning. On the one hand, it implies gratitude and thanks, and this is related to
an act of arrogance, in which he thinks he deserves special consideration, in payment for the
debt he incurred with him as a child.
⠀⠀⠀On the other hand, ‘to acknowledge’ also means ‘to admit someone as legitimate’, which is
connected to his fear of being seen as a fraud and that by stripping him of his territory he will
feel the original humiliation again. Social E2 works tirelessly to keep the ‘promises’ that will keep
him in that place or status. However, both his own expectations and those he has generated in
others are so high that he often fears, internally and secretly, that they will find out that he really
can’t.
⠀⠀⠀In reality, he is tired of maintaining the image he has built of himself and simply needs to be
recognized as legitimate, showing himself fully with his flaws, his limits, his vulnerability, and his
fears, just like anyone else.
⠀⠀⠀The false abundance is the cognitive fixation of Two. It is the distorted belief that one has
more than the others, that there is more than enough, when in fact they have the same as the
others.
⠀⠀⠀The proud suppress their needs to believe that they don’t need it. The abandonment they
have suffered is not conscious and conditions their way of acting. He shows himself to be
abundant precisely because he feels, internally, less. It is a condition mirroring E4s, with the
difference that E2 finds an outlet in the repression of lack and identifies with an ideal and
grandiose image of himself.
⠀⠀⠀The false abundance of the ambitious has, of course, its eyes set on the social. This is a
narcissistic response, where he needs to be seen as he sees himself ideally. This idealization
disassociates him from his deep sense of really being a fraud, and he reactively interprets all his
actions and behavior within the framework of a large company and a kind attitude toward others.
He looks for appearances in which he thinks he will be seen as he wants to be recognized,
avoiding failure and emptiness, and entering the vicious circle of character.
⠀⠀⠀Social E2 sees himself as someone who, in the future, will achieve his goals, for which the
people close to him will praise his qualities. He projects onto the other the look that confirms his
ideal image, because the internal look is insufficient.
⠀⠀⠀And he constantly lies to himself, fantasizing about actions that will put him in the place he
thinks he deserves. Ultimately, his belief is that he is superior to others, that sooner or later they
will have to recognize him. The narcissistic layer is an overcompensatory reaction of his egoic
shadow, in which he devalues himself. In other words, he needs to fantasize that he has
superior abilities because deep down he doesn’t value the ones he already has, because he
doesn't see or recognize them.
⠀⠀⠀The irrational, or crazy, ideas that Social E2 has about himself touch on the themes of
greatness, omnipotence, being a messiah, and also the fallacy that his love has a different
quality. He believes that he possesses a universal love that sets him apart from the rest of the
world and that he can make everything change. He feels deeply lonely, although he seems to be
in contact with all kinds of people all the time and seems to be available, attentive and friendly.
He isolates himself because he has difficulty tolerating the faults he sees in others, and because
he is frustrated that his idealized image is not recognized. Both this isolation and the extreme
emotionality of his feelings are his defenses in case physical, psychological or affective
experiences, such as illness or sentimental or work failures, can put him in touch with his limits
and “flaws”. It is his way of escaping from depression.
⠀⠀⠀Moreover, he’s a person who works hard because his will is not enough for him to achieve
the goals he constantly pursues, so he becomes a workaholic, in a relentless effort to be
recognized.
⠀⠀⠀The Social E2 sees others as means to achieve his purposes. Some purposes that are
usually strategic: have friends to feel supported; have a partner to have sex with; have good
contacts to raise; have a good relationship with others to avoid conflicts. There is very little room
for the other, because his ambition makes him lose sight of the fact that he is a person. In fact,
Social E2, even though he claims to have many friends, is abandoned by them, especially when
he feels he has nothing to gain.
⠀⠀⠀In groups, the ambitious one is an excellent attention getter. With his emotional speech, you
hardly ever get bored; he knows where to place the accent to keep the external gaze. This, in
casual encounters, is a great way to captivate; but in the medium term it is inconvenient,
because it seems that he always has to put the cherry on top of the cake and you end up seeing
him as a pest and a cheater.
⠀⠀⠀The Social Two’s nose for what the bond is like helps him to give the other what he needs
so that the relationship does not create difficulties. However, because of his own anesthesia, it
is difficult for him to care for this hyper-demanding person with a connection in a connected way.
In fact, he shows himself to the other, and not only has difficulty admiring a verb he confuses
with envy, but thinks the other is slow, incapable, clumsy, or obtuse.
⠀⠀⠀In their relationships, they care in a superficial way and subtly despise the other in order to
gradually leave him or her in an inferior position in which they feel superior, secretly dominating.
⠀⠀⠀Regarding the world, Social E2 is apparently generous, adopting a way of behaving to last.
Basically it is like a quest for immortality through good deeds that resonate with society.
⠀⠀⠀For the ambitious person, the world is a great ladder to climb, a great terrain to conquer. He
considers that there are always more groups to reach and make themselves known, and he
loves to feel part of them, as long as he can occupy a prominent place in them. If she doesn’t
occupy a leading position, she thinks she could do better than her own boss, devaluing him,
although she doesn't assume his responsibilities. She prefers the position to the right of the
boss, a place where she can be recognized and confirmed. However, when contrasted with her
own abilities in cipa groups, or when she is put in her rightful place, she feels this as an offense
and a humiliation, and so tries to run away. When personal charm and trickery give way to real
knowledge of her true abilities, she feels like a fraud and becomes ashamed.
⠀⠀⠀The ambitious person thinks that the world is a place where love must triumph. She often
has a naive and messianic vision, thinking that the pain of the world would cease if everyone
loved as she considers she loves. This is a great difficulty, which stems from the dissociation
from his own shadow, which he does not want to look at. What is said to silence the shadow is
that one day it will reach the final, capital recognition, where all its efforts will be rewarded.
Moreover, to silence his own dissatisfaction and sense of emptiness, he believes in the strength
of his bonds in a way that is disproportionate to his strength and the care he has devoted to
them.
⠀⠀⠀In addition, you tend to prioritize the seemingly pleasant emotions, such as happiness or
excitement. That is, instead of giving vent to the emotion that needs to be expressed, it
transmutes it into a seemingly pleasant feeling, forgetting what it really needs to express, thanks
to the interpretation in the light of false abundance: Feeling so full of pleasurable, beautiful,
joyful and vital emotions, it infers that it has special qualities. Then he feels like the Sun King,
radiating happiness everywhere.
⠀⠀⠀This reinforces his forgetfulness of himself and his own ignorance of what is happening to
him and how to express it. For E2, faced with the importance of understanding what he is
experiencing, there is the egoic need for the other to validate his own behavior, because he
himself is not sure that what he feels is true, since it amplifies or alters the primordial emotional
quality.
⠀⠀⠀This is the basis of his dependence on the other's gaze, typical of emotional characters: he
needs the other to endorse the lie in which he lives, because it cannot be sustained, since it is
based on a scant understanding of what he feels internally.
⠀⠀⠀What happens to E2 is obviously the same as what happens to other people. However, his
poor global vision and his egocentric self-absorption lead him to consider what he experiences
as more relevant and significantly different from what happens to the rest of the people. The
recapitulation that would be necessary to overcome a problem through proper judgment
frustrates him by emotionalizing his thoughts and making them less accurate. By no longer
feeling like one, he excludes himself, and there, faced with this lack of a sense of parity with the
other, the Social E2 feels alone and deeply empty; a fraud.
⠀⠀⠀One of the most important ideas that this shameless man equips himself with is greatness.
⠀⠀⠀Greatness refers to a basic cognitive error, which is to consider that big beats small, defeats
small, or is better. The idea, then, is not to be based on what you have and what happens to
you, but to see it in proportion to others. Greatness somehow becomes the idea that “one must
be more than the other to be included”, because internally he only accepts what he considers
truly superior. There is no place then for what is not great. Everything that is not Social E2
separates him and moves him into the shadows; this is why he is proud of those who
unconsciously remind him of all those things about him that he hides from himself.
⠀⠀⠀This narcissistic response involves assembling a grandiose shell so that it is not perceived
that, inside, he harbors the feeling of cida. These perceptions erupt from time to time in the state
of not living up to it, which would jeopardize the larger emotional self-image, sometimes by
receiving criticism, and arrive at a cyclical behavior that combines euphoric and semi-depressive
conforming states.
⠀⠀⠀This idea of grandeur also speaks to their social conceptions. The ambitious see their
ecosystem as stratified; everyone belongs to a social scale, and “since big beats small, it is
better to be on the higher rungs of the social scale”. This irrational idea is obviously
manufactured in childhood. There is a certain tendency to relate to older people in the little big
ones. Already in adulthood, “the elders” are not the eldest, but those who occupy a prominent
place in the social scale; in short, authority.
⠀⠀⠀With this idea of greatness, it is difficult to have what Claudio Naranjo calls admiring love,
which corresponds to the way I relate to what is greater than me, such as the idea of the divine,
the authorities, or even the other that I consider valuable. Social E2 has great difficulty with
admiration, which he experiences in two very different ways. One is to exaggerate the
capabilities of the other, responding to his own ideal self. That is, he sees in the other the
capabilities that he himself fantasizes he has or can have. And the other, darker form of
admiration is repressed envy. You want what belongs to others, but without being noticed. And
so you are not able to really admire the other, because you relate to him in an ambivalent way,
showing haughtiness towards the one you admire.
⠀⠀⠀This subtype has a vertical concept of the social, where there is one above and one below.
And the ambitious one wants to be at the top, and considers himself to be below where he
thinks he belongs. This is precisely his driving force to reach a place that, in reality, he cannot
embody, although it represents his ideal of himself. For this, overwork is very important. It’s very
difficult to get a place according to your abilities, if not by lying about them, by being so
self-demanding that it can lead to self-slavery.
Since I was a child I was good at studying, I liked to learn. I had a passion for medicine: I liked
series about doctors, documentaries about doctors. I watched live operations and always said I
wanted to be a doctor. My parents supported him at all times and started telling me that I would
be a great doctor, that I would discover the remedy for cancer. I was proud to hear them; they
bragged about their daughter everywhere. She was always the girl who would be a doctor and
discover the cure for cancer. The years went by and the whole family knew I was going to be an
oncologist and when COU came and I had to decide on careers, I didn't put medicine anywhere,
not even as a last option. I felt so much pressure from family expectations that I didn’t dare and
chose a completely different career.” — ROSA USELETI
⠀⠀⠀What is the price you pay for greatness? By living in parameters that don’t belong to you.
He’s ahead of his age, so what he has to live ignores; he already wants to be in the next one.
And once an adult, he keeps asking for more: he must be at a certain point, he must be more
aware, more complete... In short, more.
◯ ◦ Omnipotence
⠀⠀⠀Omnipotence is a belief, which underpins the almost manic behavior of the Social E2, that
he can do anything. It resembles the ideal of the Social E3 in the sense that, in this competitive
society, a person can make himself and work his way up to his full potential, regardless of
external obstacles, his own limits, or the prices that necessarily have to be paid, both his own
and others’. The difference between Two and Three lies in the fact that the former considers that
he already possesses all his manifest abilities, and that the other simply has to acknowledge
them, while the latter knows that he has to “work hard to achieve an achievement and lean more
on himself” strategically on the abilities and strengths of those who accompany him.
⠀⠀⠀Social E2 considers that because he has felt at some point that he is intelligent, he really is.
He has the gift of omnipresence. He overestimates himself: he adds or multiplies, as far as
himself is concerned. Believing himself omnipotent is one of the crazy ideas that hurts you the
most. He has a strong attachment to work, with which he gets the resources he needs to feel
abundant and superior. It is a measuring stick. Being self-demanding in performance gives you
certain benefits and helps you believe that you are omnipotent. It is the self-slavery of the
ambitious.
⠀⠀⠀In the latter case, he shows all his false generosity in how helpful and helpful he can be, or
how he can save you by getting you out of so much trouble: “I’ll do it, I’ll fix it, don’t worry about
it. And on top of that, he makes you feel dependent and indebted, that is, his subject. It is very
common to see how the social Two, in relationships, manages to make the other remain at a
level of dependence that is even childish, hooked on the idealization of an authority that is so
powerful and loving at the same time.
⠀⠀⠀All Twos have a radar with which they detect better than anyone else what the other's needs
are. It can have the opposite effect on some occasions. And it is that when the ambitious one
realizes that he doesn't meet the excessive demands he makes of himself, he goes into his
depressive side, even despising the capabilities he possesses. One way or another, avoid
getting in touch with what you are.
⠀⠀⠀His is an attempt to stand out and be recognized, whatever it is, above or below; the
important thing is not to be indifferent. As in E4, there is a difficulty in being in the middle
ground, in the lukewarm. Social E2 flees from mediocrity, and if he cannot achieve omnipotent
excellence, he prefers to go to the exaggeration of everything in which he is deficient.
⠀⠀⠀One of the ways he maintains the identity of being omnipotent is by not valuing actual
abilities, but instead letting himself be carried away by his own fantasy, not only about himself,
but also about the abilities of his peers. Social E2 imagines what others' abilities are like, but is
not very aware of them; there is a certain contempt for the intellectual tasks that would allow
one to know what they are. And, above all, he cannot accept, concretely and intellectually, that
the other may have something that he does not have.
⠀⠀⠀Another idea that social E2s believe in their omnipotence is simply to underestimate what
the other does. The ambitious one focuses on seeing the inept part of the other, which he does
wonderfully among his neighborhood, the perfect social E1 and the very effective social E3.
When someone despises others, he paves the way for the only one who stands out to be
himself, and this is still a form of repressed envy. His rim bombing language is striking, full of
absolutes, and with a vehemence that makes the other start to doubt himself, and start to
accept the social E2s criteria. The speech need not be very thoughtful; sometimes he relies too
much on his own ability to improvise, with words that are often passionate but ultimately have
little basis.
⠀⠀⠀Speed and anesthesia are ways of disconnecting from the emotional. The mental among
the most emotional, the social E2, is undistinguished by tearfulness. Only when he sees the
failure or the lie behind his apparent invincibility does he allow himself to enter a closer, warmer
terrain.
⠀⠀⠀One of the ways he protects himself from contact with his own limits is by procrastination,
with the pressure he puts on himself to achieve the canons required of him. In this way, the
ambitious person leaves the task until when he has no choice but to do it in a hurry, forcing his
own rigor to be more relaxed. This helps him maintain the idea that he can do everything,
because he does it in less time than others; although he ignores the fact that he maintains a
high level of stress for it, as well as dislikes the task.
⠀⠀⠀Social E2 work often goes to push. Too much effort is followed by a time of rest, or rather, of
necessary detachment, where the social E2 disconnects from the task because the intensity
with which he has performed it has left him exhausted. Then, when he energizes himself again,
coinciding with the deadline, he will once again undertake a titanic effort, which has the dual
purpose of finishing on time and maintaining the idea that he can commit to something and
achieve it, reinforcing the idea of omnipotence.
⠀⠀⠀He not only longs for his partner’s love, which he devalues, but mainly to get a good look at
the group, which serves as emotional sustenance and as confirmation of his irrational idea of
being indispensable. He regularly dismisses his partner as demanding that he make an effort in
which he sees no social reward, and turns to her when he feels defeated. It is in the social
sphere, in being adored by the masses, that this character finds his gasoline and his chest
swells with abundance.
⠀⠀⠀The social E2 is a mass conqueror. To do this, he seduces, territory by territory, the groups
where he comes to receive a general loving gaze. This stimulates an attitude that we could call
counter-dependent, because in order not to feel his own dependence on the love of the other,
he tries to make him secretly dependent. He infantilizes the other, providing him with everything
he thinks he needs at the moment of conquest. As if it were a monetary system in which he
leaves the other in debt, being able to play with credit. When you owe money or, for that matter,
when you owe love, how can the debtor be malevolent or unloving to the creditor?
⠀⠀⠀Love, therefore, becomes a bargaining chip. The ambitious person, once he has left the
other in debt and therefore manipulated into depending on him, devotes himself to the next
conquest, carelessly abandoning the relationship for which he has worked so hard and which he
has already managed to decant for him. From then on the ambitious person will only return to
that relationship when he needs something, in a self-interested way to increase the debt, but
there will hardly be a healthy relationship in which the ambitious person exposes his
vulnerability and confesses his manipulation; he will always justify himself by thinking that it is
the other who needs him. And he will also believe that, in this way, his love for the other is
enormous and that he should be valued for what he has supposedly deposited in the
relationship.
⠀⠀⠀Paternal love has been perceived as mercantilist. It projects onto the child an image of
greatness and omnipotence, and it does not impose limits, with which the child believes he can
become unlimited, developing the crazy idea that: “If the other puts limits on me it is because he
doesn't love me or you don't understand me”. Being loved for his actions, whether good, bad,
loving or not, he is manipulated. Then, the boy, the girl, begins to elaborate the concept that he
receives love when he has done certain things, as an act of buying and selling.
⠀⠀⠀Social Two also thinks that “my love has a superior quality” to other people’s loves. The
previously expressed idea of greatness supports this concept of good love, i.e. “I am loved
because I am great”. Or also: “If I am not omnipotent, no one will love me. And one more step:
the ambitious will love you if you serve the idea that he is great, if you shower him with
compliments.
Some crazy ideas related to false good love:
• “I’ll save you”.
• “If I don’t get the approval of the whole audience, I have failed”.
• “If I don’t look like the man I want, I don’t exist or I’m not enough”.
• “If I win you over, you will always hold me in high esteem”.
• “I am loved because I am great”.
• “If I am not omnipotent you will not love me”.
• “If you fall in love with me, you will always love me”.
• “If you know my love, you will not want to try any other”.
⠀⠀⠀A special form of false good love is what we might call kindness. To be someone who
moves up the social ladder, besides possessing the omnipotence described above, one must
have good intentions. Goodness is a way of covering up hidden egoic interests and displacing
them in the shadows. On the conscious side, it would be something like a form of spiritualization
of the social E2. It is a shortcut to enlightenment to show oneself as someone who has already
achieved such skill and generosity; showing kindness as a way to sublimate ambition and
transform it into something transcendental.
⠀⠀⠀What he wants to become or become the object of his ambition is something that once
achieved he despises and where he doesn't allow himself to be, because deep down he knows
he doesn't have the real ability to display it, or doesn’t deserve it, because among other things,
on the way to reaching regency, he took advantage of others, their ideas and their fruits,
presenting them as his own. Although he is the most disciplined of the Two, power ends up
becoming a burden.
⠀⠀⠀Kindness means attributing goodness to what one does from a real disconnect with what
one desires. It is a cover-up, a falsehood. True kindness is different from walking through life
naively. The inability to understand the degree of shadow cast by your seemingly altruistic
actions only reinforces the self-centered generosity displayed by the ambitious. From there, he
can hurt and wound himself, since he is unaware that his seemingly kind acts actually seek a
secret goal: to dominate the other through dependence.
⠀⠀⠀Sometimes, when the social E2 becomes aware that something goes wrong, a numbness
sets in, a kind of almost dissociative anesthesia. For him, it is as if a saint could act sinfully,
something almost unthinkable. The guilt and shame associated with this moment are
capitalized, mixed with the stupor of discovering some hidden intentions that he had been
denying. Sometimes there you show yourself to be falsely humble, believing that you are
running away from the repercussions of your actions. Other times, you can get in touch with the
other, understand that your superiority is nothing more than a shell, and get rid of its weight,
situating yourself as human before others and before yourself.
⠀⠀⠀In order to lead groups, or to believe that they are in a position to do so, social E2s consider
the crazy messianic idea that they possess some abilities far superior to others, and that this
makes them significantly different. This idea of being the Chosen One, the son of God, the
designated successor, or being at the right hand of the father, is almost a delusional idea. Being
so narcissistic, he blushes mostly because of his small base.
⠀⠀⠀In short, someone who believes that the world is a social ladder, and that he is capable of
anything, who considers himself intrinsically good and with a different, almost unique love, it is
normal for him to think that he can lead others, or to postulate himself as the new Jesus Christ
or Savior of the masses. Napoleon, Julius Caesar, Alexander the Great, Evita Peron or
Cleopatra are good examples. They felt that they should lead their people to victory because
under their protection the empire would be better and wiser. Social E2 has a very old instinctive
ability to assert itself in the face of authority, even if it conflicts with it. And this ability was based
on having been an emotional reference figure for his parents.
◯ ◦ Cold
⠀⠀⠀Within Ennea-type 2, who is the most emotional type, this is the least so among the three
subtypes. If the defense mechanism of the E2 is repression, which turns unconscious the
thoughts, cravings and necessities regarded as unacceptable, in the Social E2 this strategy
leads to an almost complete cooling of emotions. There are times in which, faced with a
significantly painful happening, he “freezes” and loses contact with part of his emotional world.
⠀⠀⠀The Social Two can therefore remain impossible with nothing and no one able to question
his aggrandizement. If anyone saw that he cannot do something, that he doesn't know or isn’t
worthwhile, it would be catastrophic because a self-referential must not ever allow himself to fail.
At the same time, this coldness and hardness protects him and helps him cover his terror of
being once again betrayed and that no one catches him in a fall. “To protect himself, he
sometimes laughs at his feelings or ironizes them, in an attempt to avoid them, or altogether
trivializes and doesn't own them”.
⠀⠀⠀He shows himself immensely empathic and emotional when he is set to conquer. Just as he
is emotionally indifferent once it doesn’t interest him anymore or when he abandons it for
another conquest.
⠀⠀⠀The Social E2 can go, from a deep subjectivity, to transgressing the norms thanks to his
ease in diverting responsibility for his acts, nullifying his emotions, justifying inadmissible deeds,
focusing all of his energy on the object of his ambition, above the current moral codes or certain
general conventions.
⠀⠀⠀To avoid contact with his inner lack and vulnerability, he shows himself only from his
surface, with a hidden fear, keeping everyone from knowing his darker, more needy and
defective side. Or rather he covers the mistakes he makes with lies and arrogance, defending
himself with total vehemence and a certain air of innocence, which overwhelms or pushes
others away.
◯ ◦ Egocentric
⠀⠀⠀His zest for being in the center of attention giving, organizing, doing or talking, is another
way in which he pales his sense of solitude and insufficiency, as he confirms the conviction in
being the center of the universe. He thinks that from this place no one will be able to question
him, nor degrade him by taking him away from the stage from which he receives a transient
admiration that he mistakes for love.
⠀⠀⠀Inside the Social E2 there is a feracious and insatiable inner father, who shows himself
demanding, cold and without compassion, in the form of two coexistent inner currents. One
does not tolerate that he diverts from the ambition and ideals that he has fixated. Only when
reaching them will he value himself positively, although for a brief period of time, which will
rapidly turn to another objective or territory to conquer. The other current, which flows in parallel,
is an aggressive intentionality, a buried anger not always conscious, which is normally directed
at himself, neglecting his personal care, health, resting times or allowing himself to receive
affection or care.
The Social E2 follows an interiorized message from the parents: “Whatever you do, it’s never
enough”. Because of this he resorts to self-indulgence, occasionally; so that he can lower his
own prosecutory angst or negative judgements that he elaborates about himself and which he
sees in the look of whom he has validated as an authority.
⠀⠀⠀Sometimes, he can simulate withdrawal but as a way to demonstrate how without himself
nothing works.
⠀⠀⠀And this anger against the self also finds a way of discharge onto others in competition or
despise.
⠀⠀⠀As says Karen Horney, these are two sides of the same coin:
⠀⠀⠀“The proud develops a series of values that determine what he accepts in himself, of which
he must be glorified and be proud of. But this system of values has to determine what must be
rejected, disdained and hated; and one is inseparable from the other. Pride and self-hatred are
two expressions of the same process.”
◯ ◦ Depreciative
⠀⠀⠀Similarly to E1, the Social E2 has invalidated his progenitors in some way and has
developed, although this remains on the shadow, a profound despise of mistakes, imperfection,
slowness, stupidity, pessimism or fragility, both in himself and others.
⠀⠀⠀This devaluation starts to generate itself in the oedipal phase, with the polarization of the
maternal and paternal figures, where one is idealized and the other despised, and then
afterwards depreciating both. This leaves him, invariably, in a relational place in which he
doesn't belong and that is horizontal or above the parents. By devaluing them, he lacks parental
figures to idealize and with which to identify. This, in turn, will be the seed for not recognizing, as
an adult, the power-figures, self-referencing as the only trustworthy authority.
⠀⠀⠀Ever since childhood they have realized how being close to authority provides him a deal of
favors and benefits compared to his equals. They have learned that holding privileged
information or taking part in decision-making gives him a certain power.
⠀⠀⠀Thus, the Social Twos characterize themselves by believing to know better than others or
that they are more efficient than the rest and by depreciating, like proper envious, others’
attributes. It is truly complicated for them to give up authority for someone, above themselves
and their own convictions.
⠀⠀⠀In many biographies of Social Twos there are life-stories of certain intensity and instability.
These experiences, mixed with their ideas of grandiosity and importance, make him believe that
they have certain privileges or that they’re above others. They could resemble a Conservation
E2 in this; notwithstanding, they are different in that the ambitious do this from a manifested
anger and a superb and despot demandingness.
⠀⠀⠀They have their own moral code, with which they decide what norms should or shouldn’t be
respected. This regulamentation can change over time, at his whim, if the circumstances require
it, showcasing a total indifference to the ethical implications of other natures. They use and
abuse a selective memory in regards to responsibility in his issues.
⠀⠀⠀The lack of clarity with respect to his roles and the absence of limits within the subsystems
of the family suppose the greatest obstacle for a Social E2 to manage the tasks related to taking
authority. This character at times wants to be a brother (colleague), and at others, a father
(leader) to the group.
⠀⠀⠀With his critical thinking, scathing and depreciative, and his narcissistic fantasy of
omnipotence, doubts that someone can lead him. Somehow stores in memory that one day he
delivered himself, naively, to his parents’ will, and was used and betrayed. Since then is his
suspiciousness towards authority.
⠀⠀⠀The Social E2 doesn’t realize that there are external limits to getting what he desires nor to
his possibilities. Curiously, given his aggressive and confrontational ways, neither does he know
how to impose them to others (even if through humiliation). Because he can’t register abuse or
aggression as such, and may humiliate himself so as not to lose a relationship. Moreover, the
pain he feels in the possibility of loss isn’t so much related to the bond itself as it is to contacting
the idea of not being worthy and the following abandonment, which would be an even greater
humiliation.
Without relating to his own frustrations, the ego grows exponentially, because it is very difficult
for people of this subtype to sustain the possibility of failing or being defective to the eyes of
others, as well as risking himself to receive any type of critics, which seem unbearable.
◯ ◦ Competitive
⠀⠀⠀From this exalted self-image there is no competition possible. If we ask a Social E2 if they
are competitive, they will adamantly say no:
“I am competent, not competitive. I don’t need to compete. It would be ... vulgar”. — ANA BAZA
⠀⠀⠀You “know” you are the best and want to be given your rightful place. And while you
generally maintain an attitude of temperance, security and confidence, it doesn’t always pay off.
Entering the competition means wanting something you don’t have and that would put you in
touch with lack or envy, which underlie your character; or even more terrifying, with the
emptiness that causes the feeling of helplessness:
⠀⠀⠀I would never have said I was competitive because, honestly, when I was little I saw all the
other girls as so inferior to me that there was no competition possible.
⠀⠀⠀Until I started getting sick because a smart girl showed up in class and I couldn’t take it. I
underwent the stress and strain that made me sick for a year, with severe headaches and
dizziness. This I never acknowledged; what I remember is that when I repeated the year, due to
my absences to go from doctor to doctor, the first thing I thought was:
“If I was doing well before, now I will be no match”.
⠀⠀⠀At work I also suffered this hidden competition for myself when a possible rival appeared. I
have suffered a lot when I have seen a person more valid than me in some aspect, close to my
reference man or woman. There I saw my shortcomings that I lowered by not being on the
level”. — ROSA USELETI
⠀⠀⠀Your ego cannot conceive that there is a worthy competitor. You have already beaten the
most difficult and powerful competitor in your childhood: your mother or your father. Hence your
pleasure in conquering the giant and then despising or abandoning him. The underlying fear is
that if you don't succeed, he will become what you fear most: useless. Then will come contempt
and expulsion, and he will be abandoned, as in his childhood, to a chaotic emotional world and
loneliness.
⠀⠀⠀The person of this character has built his self-esteem around being valid and useful to
others. If it doesn’t work out, there comes the threat of not being useful, with the consequent
abandonment: “Everyone leaves, or I kick you out”, they often say, but it is nothing more than a
way of confirming their narrative of orphanhood and the duty of self-reliance. Faced with this fall,
Social E2 pulls himself together, isolates his fear, shrinks his heart, freezes his emotions, and
swears he won't need anyone.
⠀⠀⠀The person of this character has incorporated, early in life, the expectations that laid upon
her, which drove her to have exit in whatever it is that she purports to. Thus she is not, in
absolute, prepared to fail. Thanks to her fantasy, the defense mechanisms of repression and
sublimation, and her self-concept of grandiosity, she camouflages it so skilfully that it can't be
seen.
⠀⠀⠀Ever since she was little she would talk eloquently about herself as someone who does
many things, of which she is certain; and that “all” are done well, which is not as certain. The
key is in the adults believing her and giving motivation to keep being this way, so that she may
feel admired and also quite very powerful. Sees herself as capable of convincing others,
including of her lies. This way she incorporates an image of herself in which she is expected to
do important and innovative things and that she is successful in all she does.
⠀⠀⠀The Social E2, when getting to adulthood, tries to reproduce the same situation imagining
lots of projects and telling this as were done as a little boy or girl. Thus almost all energy is
focused on professional life, mistaking the conquering of territories with receiving love. This way
he is kept in contact with constant objectives that allow him to develop his self-image as
competent and admirable.
⠀⠀⠀He is an expert in sublimating every setback and makes others see that, even under
pressure, his efforts don’t cost him. Recollects exhibit in his different personal and professional
campaigns and this benefits him in such a way that he keeps the feeling of accomplishing
everything he purports himself. Nonetheless, even though he achieves important merits, he
sells more than he can give. In this light he can’t see how many casualties have been left in his
way, and that he does not share, confirming his own neurosis.
⠀⠀⠀Failure in the working ambit is one of the few opportunities a Social E2 will have to realize
how far can go his self-sabotage and the pain he inflicts in others.
⠀⠀⠀All energy, creativity, effort and passion that he puts in work is done in detriment of his
personal life. He sees all that is amorous, familiar, fraternal, or his own physical and mental
health, as a moorland he only visits. He has gotten to the point of forgetting to play, or enjoying
the world of love and affection; all of it to avoid connecting to his own vulnerability.
⠀⠀⠀Taken to an extreme, the Social E2 won’t care about his alimentation, nor his health and
most basic and urgent necessities, that he considers inopportune, faced with tasks of higher
priority, that are the ones deserving of his attention.
⠀⠀⠀When he fails, the Social E2 hides home or escapes by seeking big innovations in life:
changing his social surroundings, his partner or work, maybe even his country. Or he may
refuge in different addictions, such as sex, drugs, gambling... or work, which is the most beloved
and prioritized thing for him. Among the Enneatypes, we may definitely define him as the
workaholic.
⠀⠀⠀If he can’t keep a romantic relationship, he will center on friendships to deaden the
emptiness. Even then, if he fails professionally, projects are redirected to the partner with bigger
expectations and demands, planning trips, setting rules to her life and trying to “improve” her, as
if he had the strategic manual of the good partner; in this way he projects his own ambition onto
the other.
⠀⠀⠀This obsessive drive to success may manifest itself in the formula of “it’s never enough”,
coincident with the message received from the maternal figure: “You are not, and not ever,
enough”. Every goal accomplished isn't turned to anything if not the fragile confirmation of his
grandiosity and indispensability, but the emptiness is insatiable and demands constant conquers
and astounding deeds.
◯ ◦ Envious
⠀⠀⠀Envy is the monster of the Social Two. Realizing that he envies would be contacting needs,
something he lacks, and this would lead him to inadequacy and the emotional void. Contrary to
E4, he uses Envy as a drive to overcome himself, as a jumpstart to conquer what another has.
But the things, as they are: his eye is aimed at the other: what power they hold, what talents, or
gifts that he hasn’t. Of course that, again in contrast to the Four, this character feeling envy
doesn’t result in a way to be seen. To be admired he must be useful.
⠀⠀⠀E2 Social resorts to fantasy for two purposes: first, as a defense mechanism to avoid
making real contact with his more depressive emotions and underlying deficiency states; and
second, to escape from the boredom caused by everyday life or reality itself.
⠀⠀⠀His strong emotionality is functional when he foreshadows that goal he wants to achieve,
that satisfies the passion of ambition, and fantasizes about the sense of accomplishment he will
get from achieving it. And also, as a way to generate enthusiasm and excitement in others.
⠀⠀⠀You have been told by your family that you must know how to contain yourself emotionally.
Many people of this subtype have experienced anaclitic depressions in childhood, but have
learned to mask them. Since hidden depressions appear cyclically in adulthood, fantasy is an
easy resource for escaping them.
⠀⠀⠀Their imagination is fueled by reading, which was often, in childhood, the refuge to
disconnect from their own experiences and from that vast emotional world that no one helped
them understand or regulate.
⠀⠀⠀Despite being an emotional character, there is strict control over emotions, so that few are
available: disgust and anger. The rest is not as real as it seems, because emotion does not flow
with thought and action, but it is fantasy that gives rise to the different emotions and regulates
their intensity according to the interest of the moment. The examination of reality is
characterized by an overvaluation and downsizing that keeps fantasy alive.
⠀⠀⠀By means of obvious stereotypes, the E2 Social modifies reality by orienting itself toward
general thinking, excessively abstract and full of absolutes. These generalizations are intended
to maintain the illusion of understanding reality while completely modifying it. The goal is not to
question the feeling of omnipotence. The reality that E2 Social sees is built, in part, with bricks
taken from factual facts, and also with others taken from a very particular fantasy. In this reverie,
he lives in a world where he is a special, lucky and important being, and the people who inhabit
it live accordingly. And this is how he keeps his ideal of himself high.
⠀⠀⠀The histrionic can also be understood as a lived imagination, where living in the here and
now is replaced by an ideal construction of living. Social E2 constantly creates and recreates in
his mind sublime situations that could happen to him. It is somewhat similar to E7
self-absorption or the milkmaid in the story. Being an optimistic character, it is difficult for him to
see the negative aspects or the price to pay to achieve his goals.
⠀⠀⠀In general, Social E2 thinks in images, sees what he imagines, and, starting from the fact
that he can with any enterprise he sets his mind to, starts to believe. In fact, he creates an ideal
situation in his mind and tries to make things happen as he imagined, forcing reality, people and
himself, but he will not see failure or how he forces others so easily. He is particularly adept at
“inflating” reality like a turkey unfurling its tail. He is a prêt-à-porter tailor who constructs reality
according to his needs and always in his favor. As Napoleon said after winning the first battles in
Egypt: “I already see myself following in the footsteps of Alexander the Great. I imagine myself
founding a new religion, marching to Asia on an elephant with a new Koran in my hand”.
⠀⠀⠀The ambitious person likes to anticipate in his mind future successes, also to better
structure the goals he must achieve. This positive visualization of his projects leads him to
compulsive action that covers up the deep feeling of emptiness. Moreover, just like E7, he
confuses fantasizing with doing. He gorges himself on fantastic projects by wearing the medal
before the battle even begins. Social E2 uses fantasy to give wings to his emotionality, turning
into a gale in the service of the ambition of the moment. The downside is that he doesn’t take
care of relationships or attend to his basic needs, expecting others to do the same; if he doesn’t
see that match, he gets angry and charges.
⠀⠀⠀He imagines shocking and unexpected events that will solve them, conceives thoughts that
do not follow fixed rules or logical connections, and this very mental mode reinforces the idea of
himself as a particularly intuitive and resourceful person, bordering on genius. Your intellectual
life is very intense, but not always reasonable, and you search for data to confirm your
intuitions, leaving no room for doubt or confusion.
⠀⠀⠀The superficiality that is attributed to you is due, in part, to the lack of contact with your real
emotions. Not touching the pain or not “knowing” what is really happening is a result of the
emotional freezing characteristic of Two and, more specifically, of Social E2, and generates
situations in which disconnection is evident.
⠀⠀⠀We can consider Social E2 a consumer of projects; a glutton for ambition. But he does not
stay to receive love, not even his own satisfaction, which is really fleeting. On the contrary, once
the purpose is achieved, it loses its emotional value, leaving room for new desires, which will
materialize in new goals that will only serve to stimulate and retro feed a blind and overflowing
personal ambition. The goal achieved never finds a level of value that can be considered a point
of arrival, of full and lasting satisfaction. He doesn’t even stop to savor what he has conquered.
He destroys it and moves on to something else. And it is precisely this passage from the fantasy
of possessing to the reality of the relationship with the object that makes him lose interest in the
object.
⠀⠀⠀Like all emotional characters, he confuses desire, or rather, hyper-desire, with needs. The
Social Two, disconnected from his primary needs (to be cared for, loved, recognized as a
human being), transfers organismic satisfaction to the conquest of the public. Dynamics that
always leave him deeply unsatisfied and in that magical thought of being important that gives
him the illusion of feeling his existence.
⠀⠀⠀To build the emotional dynamism necessary to seduce the group and thus receive their
acceptance, she recreates tricks and fireworks in her fantasy to “stimulate” the most hidden
strings of those she wants to convince. There she finds the strength that allows her to show
herself to others as someone solid and self-assured, and therefore worthy of being heard, able
to interpret and give voice to the ideals and concerns of the listener.
6. CHILDHOOD
⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝
⠀⠀⠀The title of this chapter is paradoxical, considering that Social E2, precisely, did not have the
typical childhood experiences and probably never felt like a child. It was very early in his
evolutionary development in terms of psychomotricity, speech, and sphincter control. His
intuitive capacity and ability to perceive the emotions of others and understand the experiences
of the adult world soon become evident. In part, this is because he develops empathy early on,
exercising it with a supportive parent to whom he offered his utmost attention and care.
⠀⠀⠀Social E2 soon realizes that neither parent is really available to him, so he maintains his
own authority. And in his realm there are no boundaries, either internal or external; anything is
possible. There is no restraint, emotional or behavioral, from any figure. The image of
omnipotence that he will build from his earliest years confirms this capacity for self-government.
⠀⠀⠀Social subtype E2 has not been a particularly difficult child for his mother. He has learned
quickly to be responsible, to mature prematurely and to be considered the right hand of one of
his parents or perhaps, as Paolo Baiocchi says, the left hand, to replace his father as soon as
possible. He was a self-sufficient boy or girl who was mainly supported by his mother, and
neither the mother nor the father had to take care of the child.
⠀⠀⠀The privileged relationship between the mother and her offspring does not allow the entry of
the father, who, in the Oedipal phase, is expelled from the relationship or leaves the family,
becoming a peripheral father to be forgotten or idolized as long as he keeps his distance and
does not interfere with her wishes. If the boy or girl allows some form of rebellion against the
father, it will always be to defend the mother or siblings, who may be being treated in an unfair,
oppressive or abusive way.
⠀⠀⠀From a very young age he shows autonomy in his actions and thoughts, developing a very
severe critical conscience towards himself and others. He is treated as a more mature child,
capable of being supported by adults, so he does not learn what he may need from others, who
can also be a source of support for him.
⠀⠀⠀There comes a time when he begins to take the initiative in his actions, taking on
responsibilities that are usually well received by at least one parent. As an adult, he likes to set
himself up as a point of reference or guide for others, going so far as to intrude on their desire to
help when no one has asked him to.
⠀⠀⠀You place yourself closer to the expectations of adults and the parental system than to the
fraternal system, without experiencing the neglect of siblings or feeling complicit with them. This
leaves you with a deep sense of loneliness and of being in no man's land.
⠀⠀⠀The perception of oneself as someone endowed with magical, healing love has a clear
origin in the childhood scenario of E2 Social and can be attributed to two very important
phenomena: the wound in attachment, which will become mainly ambivalent, and the illusion of
being greater than one's parents.
⠀⠀⠀E2 Social subtype is a good boy, a good girl, in early childhood. He is the joy of the house,
eats and sleeps well, talks fast, is witty, obeys willingly, and is always ready to please those
around him.
⠀⠀⠀At this moment a triangulation begins to take shape, from which he will not escape in
adulthood, reproducing it in his couple relationships. If it is a girl, she feels that she is daddy’s
favorite, above even mommy, whom she soon begins to see as an equal and rival in paternal
love.
⠀⠀⠀Somehow, one or both parents have high expectations and trust that he or she will be
someone important in life and surpasses them. It doesn’t have to be an economic triumph, but
cultural, social and intellectual. However, they do not accompany him or her emotionally on this
yellow brick road. Some Two Socials speak of parents who are too distracted, depressed, or
irritated with the child's emotional needs. Others, of parents who are too busy or unable to tune
into the child’s deep affective experiences. The parents have not developed the necessary
function that would have helped the child process and metaphorize the intense and painful
affective phases. Therefore, the boy, the girl, learned prematurely to distract himself from the
experiences of suffering by drawing others’ attention to his false sense of well-being, feeling
satisfied, or his false sense of fullness, showing easy enthusiasm.
⠀⠀⠀Sometimes the mother gets sick, works a lot, or has to be absent due to family demands. In
any case, affective contact with the child during its first years of life is insufficient.
⠀⠀⠀The wound of childhood manifests itself as a kind of infantile depression, similar to the
so-called anaclitic depression, which involves a loss of continuity in affective development. The
disconnection during the fusion phase, normal after the first year of life, is not fluid, and this first
separation will be experienced as painful grief. As a consequence, in adult life separations will
cost this character; moreover, he will struggle to seek personal validations in relationships.
⠀⠀⠀The pain experienced by the boy-girl in the bond formation stage will make it difficult for him
in his maturity to create and consolidate deep bonds, including friendships, for which he
becomes a rather lonely person despite meeting many people and being in various groups. This
difficulty makes E2 Social an individualist who seeks relationships from which he does not wish
to separate himself; this is his existential paradox.
⠀⠀⠀The affective contact sought is a neo-proposal of the fusional relationship typical of the
mother-child dyad during the first years of life, a strong hidden affective dependence. From this
derives his constant need to feel confirmed and, although he keeps it hidden, a deep demand to
feel loved.
◯ ◦ Greatness
⠀⠀⠀In the childhood of an E2 Social there is little affective containment from the parent pair. You
learned quickly to be seen, but also gave up early on the primary need to share and understand
your emotions, and to receive support for your problems.
⠀⠀⠀Often this boy, this girl, in order to feel some affective support, has become an accomplice
of a parent. It is the mother who asks him for his concrete support in the practical and effective
management of the family, or even of the couple. And sometimes he is treated differently from
his siblings in family decisions. This responsibility and illusion of being important, which the child
accepts, are interpreted as a love that, although it doesn't warm him, warms his heart and will
soon turn into pride, because it is a mystification.
⠀⠀⠀This paradoxical situation can be managed by the boy or girl resorting to a fantasy of
grandeur, building the illusion of having imaginary powers, of having the strength to bear the
weight of responsibility, of being an essential person within the family. Illusions and convictions
that are confirmed by the manipulative messages of the parents who conspire with such a
fantasy.
⠀⠀⠀Simultaneously, a parent loads the child with his or her own dream of personal greatness,
which may or may not have a specific direction. The requirement appears implicitly in everyday
life or can be made explicit in an ambiguous way such as, “You must become great in some
way. In any case, the son, the daughter, feels that he must fulfill this mandate derived from his
parents’ need to satisfy his own ideal. Behind this request hides the narcissistic distrust of being
able to show off the little one, or the fear of not being able to respond to his own parental ideal”.
⠀⠀⠀The conditional love on which he has learned to feed and the consequent affective distance
with his siblings, as well as a subtle competition with his father or mother, lead him to feel
deeply alone. He does not experience a sense of belonging, he has no real place in the family.
⠀⠀⠀Occupying a place that is not his, will be for this subtype the impulse to keep looking for a
place in the world that meets his expectations, with the secret intention of filling his lack of not
being seen and loved by him, which he feels deeply. He was a boy or girl capable of sensing his
parents’ needs and acting accordingly. Sometimes it even seemed to him that he possessed
magical abilities and could know the others needs before his own.
⠀⠀⠀Among the painful experiences that this boy or girl hides from others, there is also a deep
sense of shame about the behavior of one of his parents, who somehow represents a danger to
his social image.
⠀⠀⠀The shame for something that has to do with them and the self-devaluation are experienced
by the Social E2 child in a traumatic way and are experiences that will accompany him or her all
his or her life. It will be precisely these secret experiences, which are not recognized by the
adults who have been hidden, that will lead him to narcissistic compensation: during childhood
he will behave like a child older than his age; and as an adult his relationships will always be
strategic and he will maintain a strong intellectual activity.
⠀⠀⠀Most of them were children physically bigger than their peers and siblings, and with a bigger
appetite. Faced with his siblings, he emerges as “the best”, the one who adheres the most to
the expectations of his parents, who also publicly acknowledge him, so he feels committed to
maintaining a very high performance.
⠀⠀⠀Maintaining such a high-level character makes it necessary to hide aspects such as envy,
rivalry, resentment, fear of error, and a deep sense of not belonging that leaves him very much
alone behind the facade of resolute control.
⠀⠀⠀As a hero, he not only assumes that he has power, but also that he can abuse it to achieve
an end that he will disguise as a noble common goal. Social E2 turns everything into a power
struggle. In which he obviously aspires to win, without caring about hurting or losing a
relationship (something he doesn’t understand, when it happens). He is very adept at omitting or
denying his failures, because he cannot maintain, even to himself, that he is not capable of
doing everything he commits to.
⠀⠀⠀The vicissitudes of life, in this subtype, resemble a tense surge followed by an equally
powerful hangover: from self-exalted excitement to consequent de-energization. His actions are
frantic and compulsive, without assessing the risks. Their goal is always to go further.
⠀⠀⠀Spontaneity in expression is also used in a manipulative way, with the goal of impressing
others in order to gain their consent and attention. The reality is that this character does not like
to reveal himself: wanting to be perfect prevents him from showing himself as he really fears to
be. Show the butterfly and hide the worm. It is difficult for him to be perceived emotionally
involved in the competition. He wants to dominate, but without “getting his hands dirty”. He
doesn’t like to feel the emotions that can arise from open competition, as this would put him in
touch with envy or fear.
⠀⠀⠀When Social E2 feels his self-esteem threatened, he falsifies reality and lets out his
aggression in order to cover up the sadness and restore a sense of well-being.
⠀⠀⠀Social E2 makes a logical justification of what he feels deeply as painful and, above all, of
what he considers unfair to him. To do so, he makes a transition from what he feels to what
would be fair to do and feel, which activates a hyper-compensation of the experience of
inferiority and of not feeling adequate.
⠀⠀⠀This character lacks reserve, meticulousness, and a sense of economy. You don’t like to
keep secrets, because the need to relate trumps any assessment of timeliness or relevance. By
revealing the confidences that the other gives you, seduced by a manipulative closeness, you
reveal your little intimacy and are unaware of the betrayal. You don’t know a relationship of trust;
don’t believe in it. The result is that he harms himself by feeding his experience of loneliness
and lack of trust in others, of their “generous and friendly love”.
⠀⠀⠀The need to seduce people and groups is closer to devouring the object of seduction than
simply wanting to be loved. It is an oral-receptive character. Although it is difficult for this
subtype to achieve obesity, they are large individuals with a rather self-destructive attitude
toward food, as they use it not as pleasure, but to cover up the feeling of emptiness on the
occasions when they come into contact with it. It is also possible that they deny themselves
food, as a way of denying that they have basic needs, or as a paradoxical form of revenge,
denying themselves what food means in contact with life.
⠀⠀⠀When you are not the center of attention, a deep feeling of loneliness comes easily. This is
why he surrounds himself with many people, even though he feels lonely inside. The approval of
others is the only lifeline in the face of this intense feeling of loneliness and desolation that he
experiences.
⠀⠀⠀He is hypersensitive to criticism and does not like to be challenged. The pretense of
admiration and the rejection of criticism are his way of trying to maintain a self-esteem that,
despite appearances, is very shaky.
⠀⠀⠀He is not aware of his exploitation of the other because he justifies it with a greater need to
fulfill the common mission. Nor is he aware of his affective exploitation when he involves others
in his projects, or when he seduces them with his ability to help, just to feed his self-image of
goodness and to feel that the other needs him.
⠀⠀⠀He positions himself as a spokesperson for the unspoken desires of others, with an
enthusiasm that generates warmth within himself and others.
“Since I was a little girl, I didn’t feel seen or loved. He was the youngest of three siblings; that is
why I always sought affective recognition, based on helping and becoming indispensable,
altruistic beyond the limit. I gave up my life as a child: I was my mother's helper, the daughter
she would like to have”. — ANTONIO MESSIA
⠀⠀⠀One of Social E2 favorite ways of self-destructing is a taste for addictions. Television, social
media, food, sex or drugs. But the one he practices with the most pleasure is that of work
addiction, which allows him to banish his affective life, his self-care, or his possibilities for
enjoyment into the shadow territory, causing interruptions in the flow of consciousness.
Concealing your needs allows you to continue to ignore them. And when he realizes that he has
neglected what is his and yours, he punishes himself by feeling unworthy and despicable. He
has sold his soul to the profession. His is a perpetual race against the clock, with no satisfaction
lasting more than a brief moment, just long enough to take a breath and embark on a new
project. This addiction helps him to deny the suffering he experiences when he comes into
contact with emptiness or the depressive feelings underlying his character.
⠀⠀⠀The people who surround him in the professional or affective field enter his merry-go-round,
where there is no real exchange, where there is no room for a voice that does not serve to
support his need for protagonism. Social E2 invades the lives of others like an unstoppable
wind. Teamwork means having a team at your service. The result, in the people around him, is a
feeling of inadequacy, of annihilation and alarm. His internal and external “rush” is in service of
the fact that no one really knows him or can get in the way of his expansion plan.
⠀⠀⠀Like the other two subtypes, the E2 Social appears free and uninhibited, but only in
appearance. In reality, his freedom is illusory, as is his supposed courage. Actions with social
impact and courageous behavior are based on a lack of awareness of how they move in the
world. What dictates his behavior is, above all, his annoyance with the rules. You could say that
he constructs a personal morality, composed of his own norms and values that may vary each
time. This is not self-indulgence, as in E7. It is not even justifications for a possible feeling of
guilt, as an E6 would do. These are logical justifications in which the Social E2 faces only
himself and others do not exist as autonomous persons. A self-referential moral constructed to
optimize the functionality of the neurotic project. The consequence of this intellectual process
ends with the confirmation of his own logic, instead of examining reality. This leads him to not
cultivate doubt and to fall into the illusion of omnipotence.
⠀⠀⠀His high expectations and the image he has created of himself prevent him from being free
to publicly reveal his limits, his vulnerability, or his needs; including the fact that he seeks
support, care, and protection, which would result in the lowering of his social image and the
impoverishment of his self-image, he idealizes the big da, something that would be very painful
for him. Underneath the god is hidden a child who could never be like that and who grew up
hiding his humiliating smallness.
⠀⠀⠀The denial of vulnerability is a patriarchal aspect of the ambitious, who always wants to be
on the crest of the wave and will never ask. In this way, he cancels out the feelings of
inadequacy that would obscure his self-exaltation. It is the trap of false abundance that, in the
long run, turns against him at the intrapsychic level, with feelings of painful deprivation.
“When the change of conditions no longer requires the effort to maintain the whole, I fall into a
frankly depressive psychophysical prostration, which I fear and hide as much as possible”. —
ALBA ARENA
⠀⠀⠀Intolerant of mediocrity, her passion is in touch with the feeling of self-triumph. For a person
as special as she feels, there is no life without excellence, something that leads to
self-destructive situations. The game of life is to bet on a winning horse.
⠀⠀⠀As is evident, the world of relationships and love is greatly damaged and impoverished in
Social E2, who uses it to attack and self-attack. He is afraid of giving up on himself, of losing
control, and of his own inner chaos, so if he experiences them, he puts aside the feelings that
arise. He positions himself as someone who is uncompromising, rigid, and perfectionist,
especially with his family and those closest to him.
⠀⠀⠀His marked elitism makes him very selective with whom he considers part of his inner circle.
And in his arrogance, he thinks it is normal that others want to be his friends, but he cannot
understand what they could contribute to him.
⠀⠀⠀He is a territorial, possessive and very utilitarian person, aspects that are diametrically
opposed to what love is, so that few people stay among his friends. The work overload he is
under leaves him little time for the necessary cultivation and care of friendship, so that he can
maintain some distance relationship, but it becomes almost impossible for him on a daily basis.
As a metaphor, it works with filial love in the same way as with plants: an E2 Social doesn’t
usually have them, because he either drowns them or lets them die of thirst.
⠀⠀⠀For this person it is difficult, and internally he feels it is very dangerous, to establish solid
and stable attachments. He has forgotten in the shadows any need for love; among other
reasons, because he is ashamed to show himself dependent, tender, or needy, and has difficulty
submitting to the wishes of another.
⠀⠀⠀In his “false” need for independence, he finds it extremely difficult to establish horizontal
relationships. Pretending to position oneself as the essential one, the boss, the independent
one, or the most capable one invariably makes the other want to run away, tired of being under
the tyranny of the emperor. This perpetuates their feeling of not belonging and confirms their
inner perception of loneliness.
⠀⠀⠀The damage that is difficult for him to recognize is how he puts the other in a condition of
inferiority, since his greatness is unattainable. At the same time, by transmitting his affective
need to the other, weakened and pending, he keeps him in a double bind: “you always need me,
and you will recognize me as greater than you”.
⠀⠀⠀The theme of love will be dealt with in the following chapter, but it is worth highlighting, even
if briefly, E2 Socials relationship with sexuality. His great difficulty with surrender and trust
makes this terrain extremely dangerous, if not unnecessary, as he considers that there are more
important things to do. There may be two situations that seem opposite, but are not. Either the
fear of sexuality prevents you from having intimate relationships, or the fear of intimacy gives
rise to compulsive sexual behavior. In other words, either they deny or use sex as a tool for
manipulation. The case is not reaching an effective and intimate relationship, something that
would leave you without defenses, somehow losing control of the situation and of yourself on an
emotional level.
⠀⠀⠀Social E2 is, after all, an unprotected child disguised as a moody giant, who gets
emotionally and behaviorally agitated wherever he goes, destroying any possibility of loving and
being loved unselfishly. His final revenge takes shape mercilessly by attacking and attacking
himself, denying himself any kind of love so as not to feel used, betrayed, excluded, or
abandoned again; the heart does not suffer if it is not given the chance to feel.
⠀⠀⠀For a Social E2, it is necessary to identify the disturbance in the regulation of self-esteem.
The grandiose ego persists based on narcissistic inversions, which prevent the formation of a
normal, compensated superego integrated with ego ideals. As we have seen throughout this
book, Twos expression of pride is an attempt to shake off an insecurity in the realm of
self-esteem. Proud people have in common the elimination and hyper-compensation of those
who, on the other hand, pre-feelings of inferiority and insufficiency dominate in the Four.
“Asking is difficult for me; I feel it as a form of weakness. I often transfer my needs to others and
that makes me feel better; then I don’t notice them. Since taking the SAT I have started to
recognize them”. — MAURIZIO MARTELLI
⠀⠀⠀Anger, whose perception and expression is not difficult for this character, can be a parasitic
emotion that covers up and mystifies sadness. Therefore, it is opportune to take the occasion
when it seems to investigate further.
⠀⠀⠀As for the feeling of excited joy, it may be a defense, linked to intellectualization and
strategic elaboration, to overcome, with an imaginative activity, a difficulty with which one does
not want to come into contact.
⠀⠀⠀It is convenient that this subtype be in contact with deep experience, with the body that
speaks and tells the truth: to stay in the here and now, the only antidote to the intellectualization
and internal dialogues with which one intends to console oneself.
8. THE LOVE
⏝⏝⏝⏝
⠀⠀⠀E2s like to touch, laugh, play, look into your eyes, create an atmosphere in which you feel
that magic is happening. Contact with an E2 becomes a promise of something profound that will
happen in this relationship. And it happens, because for this character each contact represents
an opportunity to recreate the state of fusion with the mother, with the illusion of healing the old
wound of loneliness that he carries in his heart. This form of contact presents a great difficulty,
because it cannot be maintained over time due to its excessive intensity; it seems more like an
excitement than a mature feeling.
⠀⠀⠀Social E2 makes promises that he does not keep. The intensity will be interrupted. Two, in
general, gives more than he promises and promises more than he gives. It invests heavily in
relationships, but is fickle and superficial. Instead of an upward spiral, where the meaningful
relationship is gradually cultivated, deepened and nurtured, the E2's set up is made of rises to
the top with falls in equal proportion.
⠀⠀⠀E2 Social subtype, as a merchant of a paternal love that he does not know directly,
imagines it, idealizing it. He manipulates the relationship by posing as a guide, with the goal of
buying filial and admiring love. He wants to be admired and loved as a child might wish. To do
this, he sells his enthusiasm with projects and goals, proposing himself as a parent who knows
where to go and how to get there. He generously shares it with his children, from whom he
expects obedience and service in gratitude and recognition through his efforts to improve his
image.
⠀⠀⠀One or both parents have placed their own unmet needs on him, offering him manipulative,
utilitarian and conditional love. Thus, all their relationships contain these three components,
desperately seeking what they believe is there and what they interpret as unconditional love,
which they idealize and can never get back. This leads to continual frustration, which leads to
revenge in the form of punishment and withdrawal. Thus, he condemns himself to a life empty of
love.
⠀⠀⠀This love of admiration of his is not, however, as Naranjo says, “a love of God or of other
aspects of an abstract kind, such as beauty, music, or art”. Rather, he seeks to impress and be
adored, through his magnified image, like a patriarch. Social Two basically presents two
distorted ways of admiring love. Since he is unable to give himself to something greater, he
turns it into self-adoration. And at the same time, he assigns a disproportionate value to the one
he wants to conquer in order to then feel admired.
⠀⠀⠀E2 Social lacked the love that looks up to heaven, as a model of authentic love from mother
to father is commonly absent. Moreover, since he disguises himself as an adult and a father, he
does not know how to admire, but loves to be admired. He is a child disguised as an adult and a
father.
⠀⠀⠀This love of admiration that he longs for leads him to cultivate a self-image as a charismatic
person, intense and good at the same time. His great desire is to be loved by the people, an
enlightened leader who is followed out of love and not fear.
⠀⠀⠀As for Eros, he belongs to the world of the instinctive, an aspect of himself that is very
difficult for him to accept. Sexuality puts him in touch with something that makes him very
uncomfortable: his animality. He has lost touch with his essential nature, and secretly suffers
from sexual shame. He cannot carry within himself aspects that bring him so close to his need
for the other and to his own humanity.
⠀⠀⠀Despite his innate seduction, he runs away from dedication to pleasure, and even more to
intimacy, because he feels betrayed just when he felt that ecstasy of oneness in childhood. Love
at this level is forbidden territory. The fear of such exposure is overwhelming, and E2 Social
becomes evasive so as not to relive the deep sense of deprivation and betrayal that he
experienced as a child and that somehow meant the death of an essential part of himself: the
capacity to surrender and to trust in being worthy of being loved.
⠀⠀⠀It is useful for Social Two to pay attention to sexuality, to discover it both as play and as a
form of self-love. From there you can loosen your armor to abandon yourself to a state of rest
and surrender that allows you to detect your innermost needs.
⠀⠀⠀Compassionate love is deeply distorted in the person of this character, and is always
utilitarian and exaggerated. Although she has a great capacity for empathy, is generous and
sympathetic, she does so from a manipulative movement. The gesture comes from the heart,
but the ego quickly turns it into an opportunity, in the form of personal benefit, which is no longer
genuine or selfless.
⠀⠀⠀While she has a real ability to see the light in the other, she puts it into play in the form of
cloying flattery and creating a bond of loyalty and debt to her, as a way to create subjects who
will follow her.
⠀⠀⠀She cannot be compassionate because her self-exigence makes it difficult for her to see the
fragility or the possibility of error, either in herself or in the other. This would be a dangerous
opening of the heart, which puzzles her. To avoid this, she maintains a sustained anger that
traps her in contemptuous judgment of everyone and everything. This contempt is a defensive
reaction, and the devaluation of the other has as a consequence a distancing from both the
divine and the human.
⠀⠀⠀He suffers the pain of others, but perverts it through a theatricality born of his
hyperemotionalization. The only available path will be to enter the dark night of the soul and go
through it with the pain and the lack of a hand, opening himself to his own finitude and
vulnerability.
⠀⠀⠀The E2 Social is able to establish supportive relationships and forms of exchange, although
always linked to the pursuit of personal benefit. His own neurosis prevents him from giving
himself the freedom to receive care and attention and to establish relationships in which
maternal love prevails, projecting onto the other his deepest need for affection.
⠀⠀⠀In the couple relationship, the E2 Social is apparently the less dependent Two, although in
reality he is counter-dependent. More than intimacy, he seeks recognition of his special gifts
and, in one way or another, ends up becoming indispensable.
⠀⠀⠀The E2 Social person sells a relationship of parity, but what he really wants are subjects. He
doesn’t know how to function in horizontal relationships, and in the couple it will be no different.
She feels stronger, smarter, faster, more decisive and capable. To prove this to the other, she
enters a competition that only ends when the couple submits and she comes out on top. He
achieves this thanks to his control and his ability to anticipate, organize and take advantage of
every opportunity that arises, leaving the other with a feeling of uselessness, clumsiness,
slowness and lack of reflexes that will inevitably impose an internal distance and an unequal
relationship. The power has already been established.
⠀⠀⠀When the E2 Social is in a relationship, sooner or later he will start trying to polish in the
other what doesn't fit his ideal. Always from a subtle manipulation he will be modeling these little
inconveniences. If the partner makes a mistake or shows some discrepancy, he will be
condescending, like a mother who has to educate her child, or he will start a vehement
dialectical battle loaded with emotional manipulations until, out of conviction or boredom, the
other gives up.
⠀⠀⠀It is in the home that the emperor appears most clearly as a gift and laden with rights, who
has far more important matters to attend to than the “occupation” of a home. He gives the love
of a father, but not the warmth and tenderness of a mother's love. What Social E2 likes is to
organize, plan, decorate and, above all, to order what should be done and how it should be
done. It may seem that he is the one who carries the load, but in reality it is the others who take
care of the more domestic and daily tasks.
⠀⠀⠀If someone is visiting, it’s different: Social E2 can creatively dazzle and impress guests,
even if you have to invest many hours of preparation or subject those closest to you to your
multiple perfectionist demands; all for the sake of public image.
⠀⠀⠀He is very possessive and territorial, so if he feels threatened in any way, he will use all his
charm, various tricks, and even his seduction skills: all to get the other back. This also applies to
friendly relationships. If he is able to touch the pain that the fear of loss causes him, he will
experience it first with disbelief and then as something devastating.
⠀⠀⠀Childhood resentment and distrust in the face of possible betrayal, understood as any form
of dissent, appears in the form of revenge, which materializes as silence, contempt, distance,
cynicism, and coldness. The empress and emperor cyclically need confirmation of their value
and position of privilege. Therefore, they expect their partner to make sacrifices that will
guarantee their love. To do this, they may ask you to stop doing activities that interest you or
any subject that is of relative importance to the other.
⠀⠀⠀E2 Social is and is not in the love relationship. Something internally does not allow him to
give himself or commit himself deeply and sincerely, because this entails an archetypal
dilemma, which is my dichotomy between fidelity to father or mother, depending on whether he
is male or female, and fidelity to the couple. On the other hand, and although he aspires to
merge with the other and idealizes love, he is convinced that love is always conditioned and
utilitarian, as he experienced it in early childhood.
⠀⠀⠀They usually have many adventures, but rarely pair up and tend to be long-term
relationships. In the case of women, they are quite faithful and when they break up, they leave
room until the next relationship. There are other cases that have different lovers throughout their
lives, but fail to consolidate a couple. Some reasons for this are their high demands, their need
for independence and freedom, or their prioritization of the professional over the personal. It is
common for E2 Social to leave the relationship, due to frustration of their high expectations,
boredom, inability to sustain commitment and intimacy, or not being dumped.
⠀⠀⠀Sometimes they use sex compulsively, as a form of conquest and domination, but also as a
means of contact, to discharge accumulated tension, and mainly and unconsciously, to avoid
the fear of intimacy. There is no real surrender to Mistress Rose, nor can she easily relinquish
control.
⠀⠀⠀The family, as the group, can be the place where the desire for recognition unfolds,
occupying a place of reference: good advice, guidance if needed, and protection. Forced in
some way to be the emotional support of the system, he cannot appear weak or needy. He tries
to avoid displays of affection, as they put him in touch with his vulnerability and he feels he
might break.
⠀⠀⠀Social E2 is often used to resolve inter-familial relational conflicts and this gives him a
certain power, it leaves him on ground that is under his domain, but which he cannot share with
anyone, because he excludes himself from the filial system in order to place himself above
others, his siblings and his parents; he is only willing to receive love of admiration.
⠀⠀⠀She feels very strongly the desire to rise above the masses and mediocrity in order to
occupy a privileged place of visibility and personal importance, and she manages to satisfy this
need by helping the couple to achieve a social visibility useful for their personal project.
⠀⠀⠀He confuses the love he receives from groups with unconditional love. He thinks it is love
when, in fact, it is recognition. Social E2 experiences this as acclaim from those who become
part of his territory. And if we talk about possession, it is impossible that it is love. In his
exaltation before the applause of the person of this character, he confuses being admired with
being a group, loved, accompanied, loved, sheltered, included.
⠀⠀⠀Social woman E2 has not, in general, played with dolls. When she observes it in others, she
despises it as something superficial, absurd, and as if it is unnecessarily lacking. She does not
feel the urge to be a mother because of this instinct. The mission to fulfill with the world prevails
and fills everything.
⠀⠀⠀The vital project does not include motherhood in principle. There are many goals to fulfill
professionally, so the couple is often downgraded. She spends a lot of time in a wide social
circle, as she can be immersed in different projects at the same time.
⠀⠀⠀There are different reasons that can spark the motivation to have children, but none seem to
arise solely from love and the satisfaction of a motherhood instinct. The city, or that people
around them are thinking about becoming mothers, arouses in them a buried envy.
⠀⠀⠀Another reason may be, depending on her profession or social position, that motherhood
gives her a status that she sees as an added value: to favor her social image, to be consistent
with what she says in certain contexts in which she is inserted, or to demonstrate that she can
with everything. That’s when she considers it, as one more enterprise to conquer: being a
mother.
⠀⠀⠀From the moment she learns of her pregnancy, she starts working as if it were a new
project. She informs herself, reads and attends all the courses to show that she will be a good
mother. She becomes controlling of herself and her surroundings, but a receptive, loving and
nurturing instinct for protection or motherhood awakens in her.
⠀⠀⠀When something goes wrong in parenting, her arrogance and magical thinking leads her to
believe that she is solely responsible. Underneath is the deep sense of orphanhood that has
accompanied her since childhood, having placed herself above her father and mother, and a
real desire to have a family to belong to, albeit, again, from a place of importance.
⠀⠀⠀After you start your new business, you will see everything related to pregnancy and
parenthood as an extension of your self-image.
⠀⠀⠀The Social Two mother prides herself on being active until the last moment, emphasizing
her ability to cope with dignity and calm. In reality, there is little contact with her own need for
care and rest, as her threshold for physical pain is quite high and she is also unaware of the
stress that both she and the fetus are accumulating. He does not want to give up any of his
other projects and will only stop if someone external forces him to do so. There may be illusion,
but in reality it is a reflection of what he sees in others, and he doesn’t seem to be very aware of
the changes that the birth of the baby will bring about in his life or the sacrifices that will be
required to be present in education.
⠀⠀⠀At the moment of birth, he may be a bit alert, judging what is happening. He may even want
to lead the medical team. It is as if it is not happening to her, a mere observer of the event. It
may be that she is planning and coordinating with others rather than focusing on the baby or
what she is feeling from a position of just being a mother. The moment of birth can become
more of a scenario.
⠀⠀⠀Social mother E2 intends to go back to work quickly and delegate the daily care, as if that
part that is so “human” does not correspond to her. In reality, and without realizing it, he harbors
a somewhat disconcerting internal feeling of not knowing and that it is too big for him.
⠀⠀⠀In terms of upbringing, there is an imbalance between neglecting aspects such as contact
with the child, taking him to the park or daily care, and overstimulating others, such as the
intellectual part or the creativity in which he can act with his own child, as in other aspects of his
life: the neocortex, to the detriment of the mammalian brain.
⠀⠀⠀You may find it very difficult to see your child as a being that needs care, attention and
presence, with its own rhythm. It seems that there are almost always other priorities, urgencies,
and dispersions before attending to it.
⠀⠀⠀There is an abandonment of the creature to the extent that it wants to continue directing
most of its energy to its professional or personal projects. In many aspects of parenting, she is
fickle and erratic. As for nurturing, she is an ambivalent mother: she can behave in a very
refined and rigid way, or be careless, as an extension of the carelessness she has with herself.
⠀⠀⠀Mothers of this subtype do not play actively. They prefer to use their sense of humor, read
stories, or stimulate with toys that have pedagogical recognition. They are very creative and set
themselves up as resource providers for their active children at opportunities. They can
celebrate the best birthdays, a car socially. In general, they pay more attention to what affects
their image, of which their daughter or son is now a part.
⠀⠀⠀It is practically impossible for them to maintain boundaries in every way. They do not usually
enforce punishments, and if they do, they are practically never enforced. Their dialogical and
permissive style assures them that their children will indeed respect some minimal rules more
implicit than explicit, but with which they feel respected. They are ambiguous and very lax about
the rules at home, although if they express their anger, it will be blunt, brief, and without
consequence.
Or they become rigid and demanding and ask for everything at the same time.
1. SEXUAL TWO
⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝
﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋
⠀⠀⠀When pride invades or parasitizes the sphere of sexual instinct, the emphasis is on being
irresistible, unforgettable. This sphere is not only that of the sexual relationship, understood as
one of the deepest and potentially pleasurable human bonds of intimacy, but also that of the
affective relationship; me-and-you. In the case of Pride, everything that is emotional is oversized
and nurtures the feeling of superiority. It will be in this affective bond with the other that the
human being's natural instinct for intimacy and pleasure will be most visibly deformed. We are
faced with the most seductive characters, placed at the service of attention, love, struggle and...
everything.
⠀⠀⠀Pride’s passion for the sexual instinct manifests itself in a personality that is affectively labile
and superficial, seductive and sexually provocative, almost always intoxicated with love, dazed
and prone to illogical thoughts. Her rash behavior, impetuous ways create social problems and
turbulent relationships. She is histrionic and hypomanic, with a tendency to be monotonous and
frivolous, and capable of creating fantastic images that intrigue and seduce the naive.
⠀⠀⠀It is a character most often found in women. Attractive and dangerous, she dislikes the other
and is expert at whetting the appetite in a way that embodies the archetype of the vampire or
femme fatale, who feeds on it. She manifests many narcissistic personality traits.
⠀⠀⠀He is independent, although he puts a lot of energy into being perceived and recognized as
a special person. And it is precisely this detail that reveals a deep dependence on the other,
which he wants to hide. Dependence that leaves him trapped in the relationship, with the result
that he is not free, despite his efforts to appear wild and autonomous.
⠀⠀⠀The origin lies in having been an eroticized girl (or boy) in the primary relationship with the
mother or father. He received confusing attentions between affection and pleasure. Two
dimensions are naturally linked in the child, but in the case of Two, this nature was diverted to
eroticism due to the lack of clarity in the physical and affective contact with the parents. The girl,
the boy, has thus learned that love passes through sexuality, and that provoking pleasure in the
other is a privileged channel to get attention and, ultimately, to get love.
⠀⠀⠀In adulthood this channel is exclusive, with the consequence that one cannot distinguish
between natural sexual desire and the need to have a loving contact. The sexual instinct takes
over and leads the person to be a slave to the need to be desired in an exclusive way, often
giving up or not knowing how to give adequate space to other satisfactions, such as being cared
for or fulfilled in social, field, or professional life.
⠀⠀⠀ Sexual Two has the ability to make others feel at ease: they are generous, forgiving, and
flattering; but they can also be uncompromising and dismissive when their pride is hurt. Hungry
for intimacy, and always relationship-oriented, they are passionate and agreeable while the
feeling lasts. They are also very sensitive, to the point of getting angry when they feel their pride
is unrequited.
⠀⠀⠀They are endowed with a fascinating, often unconventional aura that they use a lot in their
intimate relationships. They seek excitement, fall “madly in love” easily, and become fleetingly
attached to one person or thing after another. They are vigorous, effervescent, lively, generally
good-humored (though temperamental), active, and impulsively expressive. Very lively in their
gestures but with touches of more or less marked shyness, and with a mimicry that is varied but
not always decipherable by their changeable and ambivalent attitude.
⠀⠀⠀They neglect promises and break contracts. Without internal structure or self-discipline, they
succumb to the temptation of new and exciting stimuli.
“I want to be the best lover, the best friend, the most creative, the funniest...the best and the
best for my partner. In return, I want you to give me everything. And everything is everything!
That’s what makes me tick and gives meaning to my life. And as soon as I feel that he doesn't
give me “everything”, I start questioning the relationship: “It’s not the same anymore.... It’s not
like before”. I get hurt easily and distance myself. I blame the other for not being up to the task
and walk away, certain that I will find other men who can give me what I deserve. In fact, I
always have a secret agenda of possible candidates that I can call (use) to satisfy my inflated
image of myself”. — ANONYMOUS
⠀⠀⠀Sexual E2 bases his strong relational drive on the need to become wanted through a
generous giving and giving attitude, with the secret desire to make himself indispensable.
2. THE CHARACTERISTIC
NEUROTIC NEED
⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝
⠀⠀⠀Seduction, the word that defines his passion, is, in sexual E2, the desperate attempt to fill
the existential void by reaching an unreal love. The intrinsic belief is: “I am not wanted for who I
am, I have to make myself wanted, I have to be irresistible, I have to unleash my weapons”. But
the affective emptiness is not filled; nothing satisfies it. Hence the continuous search for more
and more intensity.
⠀⠀⠀The Sexual E2 uses seduction to the limit of its possibilities, and in both aspects of the
secum ducere: moving toward the other in order to capture, by this passage, the other for
himself. It sharpens your attention to every detail of the relationship so that you can understand
whether you are loved, and how much, and whether you are considered special. He is always
welcoming and forgiving, even when criticizing the recipient of his love (while knowing how to
lash out when he wants to point out his detachment). Warm, humane, and enthusiastic, he
enjoys each other’s company and is able to care for him to the point of anticipating his needs.
⠀⠀⠀However, he traps himself in the net of capture he weaves, to the point where he is unable
to say no to those who show him their appreciation, ending up in relationships he did not
choose.
⠀⠀⠀Tolerant to the point of self-denial, she makes a tenacious effort to realize her dream of love.
But underneath is a great lack of modesty and a sense of superiority over her partner, who
drinks of knowing how to meet her most regressive needs and the firm belief that he can satisfy
(and even change) her more than anyone else.
⠀⠀⠀In fact, this sexual subtype is characterized by a deep conviction of being the ideal woman
or man, the healer of the other’s wounds, or the inspirer of their creativity and success. It has
difficulty realizing how demanding and full of mental reservations it is with others, and
consequently how manipulative its warm welcome is, whose purpose is to arouse the other’s
desire, to confirm “that one is loved unconditionally”.
“Being in a couple, I aspire to leave an indelible mark on their being. To be that special person
who will be remembered with a smile and gratitude...forever. — I am fed up with seeing him
happy and I get credit for that; « Thanks to me » I have a place in his soul that is eternal; I know
(and he will realize too) that I was so special...” — ANONYMOUS.
“Secretly I am proud of his progress, he got it because he was with me, he “passed through my
hands” and so are my results, and that is how I calculate. — May he recognize me for how
important I was to him, unforgettable. Like in the song “Remember me”. Remember me when
you sleep and I guess what you dream, when away from our bed it’s me you think of.
Remember me when you look into the eyes of the past, when I no longer wake up in your arms.
Remember me loving you, looking into your eyes, tying myself to your life. That my soul was
tattooed on your skin”. — ANONYMOUS
⠀⠀⠀Fascinated by himself and by his supposed capacity to pour out rivers of love, this character
claims to always know how to steal other people’s smiles, thus ensuring himself a reference
image with traces of delight and voluptuousness, which will serve as fuel for his ever-increasing
release of seduction.
⠀⠀⠀He seduces, yes, only those who deserve his attention, those worthy of interest. And to
seduce, he flatters, lavishing excessive praise on the other so that the other will do the same,
and reinforces his magnified image with flattery.
⠀⠀⠀A specific way of seducing the E2 Sexual is abduction. The prey is separated from the rest
when it falls into the spider’s webs, who neither eats it nor kills it, but entangles it with its thread,
to which it remains attached, and leaves it there until it becomes interested, feeding it, with
flattery, seducing it without surrendering to it, while it continues to weave its web for further
conquests, but without leaving him.
⠀⠀⠀The predator seduces his victim by reducing her field of vision. He tries to manipulate her
way of acting, thinking and feeling, so that she becomes someone to his measure, who meets
his expectations, which is not to say that he wants a “coward”, who would no longer interest
him. It is the ambivalence of, “Be as I want you to be and, at the same time, be yourself so that
you can be worth me”.
“I have a whole range of resources and ways that cover up the strategy of seduction, in a range
from maximum self-confidence to sobriety.
My wound is: “Look at me... because I don’t feel seen... or even unloved". I sought my father’s
gaze but experienced it sexualized and was ashamed to feel his pride in me. From then on, I
activate my whole repertoire so that you look at me with very good eyes.
It is a constant and irrepressible search for love (in the form of being seen, accepted and valued
in all its expressions). I try to attract your attention to me and be the center. The worst thing is to
be invisible, or to feel “neutral”. I want to please, leaving an indelible and unique impression. To
impress you.
Seduction involves my whole body, emotion and psyche, and comes automatically and naturally.
There is a preference for pleasing the male, but I make no distinction and it is activated with
women, children... even objects. Anything can be seduced; it can be put into action at any time.
The most important thing in my life is relationships, and I distinguish between seduction:
a) Specific. About someone specific that I find interesting and deserves my attention. I want to
attract him to me, win him over, and activate passion (falling in love and falling for him). Here I
put the point of view on the other person, on being interesting in his eyes; I feel passionate
about the way he looks at me.
b) Indiscriminate. About anyone, as long as it feeds the image of myself, for my own passion.
The reference point is feeling good and looking interesting in my eyes.
• They are usually fleeting contacts, where I use relationships to push myself.m
• My letter of introduction is my smile, which is also my most expensive. Years ago, before these
medical-aesthetic advances that exist now, I fantasized that the worst thing that could happen to
me was that my front teeth (the ones I clean most carefully) would be missing.
• I show a smiling, sparkling, youthful, fresh image. Animation, enthusiasm, optimism, and fun; I
constantly make little jokes.
• I sell a sense of freedom and security in myself. Anti norms and welcoming.
• I offer: Attention, time, energy, sense of humor, critical sense, understanding, exclusivity,
companionship, interest in you and your things (at least when I want it).
• I flatter with niceties.
• Welcoming, warm, friendly. I have a kind word for everyone, a complicit gesture, a
personalized advice or message; I try to make you feel comfortable in short distances.
• Exquisitely detailed, meticulous in surprises and an excellent hostess, I entertain with gifts. I
remember people’s names. I like my body, my attributes, move with grace and walk with ease,
swaying, light hips and loose pelvis. Corporally attentive (with body slightly leaning forward, I
nod continuously: I make sure I hear you), gesticulate and make faces and other comical
gestures, with an open gaze; whistle and hum easily.
• On a mental level: loquaciousness, expressive ease, and relaxed, multifaceted conversation. I
speak spontaneously.
• With an open, light, flexible, innocent (not standard or trendy), hippie, chic alternative
appearance, my style is natural and I don’t need additives; just putting on some earrings already
feels good.
According to a friend, whom I asked to describe me, my attractions are: smooth white skin,
generous and healthy curves, I exude voluptuousness; clear and mischievously attractive eyes,
hand gestures, body posture, self-confidence in speech and in boldness (I am driven and do not
retreat, even if I do not know where I am stepping), curious and loving. My warrior attitude also
stands out: with character, confrontational, non-conformist, free.
Another friend confessed to me that “there is nothing as seductive as half-veiled shame”, and I
realized that even shame can be used as a seduction strategy. Examples:
With women: We were in a common training and we met the day before. I was very fond of her
and she had to be away for a few days; I made a display of my charms by preparing for him
varied and careful sandwiches for his trip, anticipating and facilitating the logistics. She was
impressed with my predisposition; today we are great friends.
With psychopaths: My friend used to comment on her fear of meeting a possible psychopath. I,
on the other hand, thought: “Total... He’s just a human”, relying on my personal skills and
resources to dissuade him, even imagining that in five minutes of talking to me he would
redeem himself (“psychopaths for me ...”). This same friend reminded me that she once found
me in a cordial attitude with a girl, and when we said goodbye I told her “And the next time you
see me ... don’t hold me back”. It seems that he approached me in an intimidating way to steal
me away, and I redirected the situation with my seductive skills.
To this day I use “conscious seduction” in my work to relieve tension when conflict arises with
angry users. I am very good. I always have under my hat some laughable or funny comment,
flattery, jokes, and other niceties and courtesies to ease the tension, turning their anger into a
smile.
With men: Either I put them on the pedestal, idealized, object of my desire, or they are
underground and I write them off.
Mechanism of attraction: In the presence of a man who attracts me, I activate a “hunting”
automatism. A radar points to him, and even if his back is turned or he is far away, there is a
thread that connects, an energy that intertwines. It is an instinct where all my senses are
activated, focus and emanate towards the person who is the object of my desire, who remains
in my sights.
I follow his trail, like an animal on the prowl, with all my attention focused there, while I am doing
other things (I don’t need to look directly at him); only I know, and I am extremely discreet when
other people are around.
I want her to feel desire for contact with me: laughter, glances, irrepressible desire for romance
and skin touch ...
When contact is established, I want to tighten the thread that keeps us close and I focus,
receptive to any indicator, on that person exclusively; my whole life is focused on her. I try to
anchor a powerful thread in your body that keeps me energetically united to you.
Example: We slept in adjoining rooms, although I hardly slept all night, between the summer
heat and the heat of my body from the excitement of your presence. I felt a desire for contact; I
liked him and his body. Two weeks later I was still torturing myself with the question: “Why didn’t
I sleep with him?”
I want someone who loves me and is very available to me (gives me unlimited attention). As the
song says, “I only want a little bit of your whole life”. I am intolerant of total lack of attention.
Example: Someone picks up the phone and looks at it while he is with me, or doesn’t look at me
when I talk to him, or doesn't gesture confirming that he listens to me with interest.
But there is a fine line: if you are too available, I call you dependent, internally I disempower you
and reject you. And if you don’t listen to me, or are not completely available, I act out my anger
and question, disqualify, or despise you with invalidating comments, looking for your flaws; I can
be very harsh and sharp.
Example: He was aware of me, but he saw me as soft, “he pinched” me, he did what he wanted
with me. I punished him by sleeping with his best friend, giving him the message: “I am not
exclusive to you”. In another similar example, he showed no sexual interest in me, and I took it
out on him by going out with his friend.
I have relentlessly sought the love of a partner, idealizing the man and the relationship. The
feeling of falling in love is like gasoline; when I fall in love, I cling to the illusion of how wonderful,
how ideal it will be. Being in a relationship: “With you I don’t need anything else, the whole world
is this, this is now, this is you. And I make your life easier, supporting you in your projects in
exchange for your constant signs and demonstrations that you are for me, because if not, I’ll
demand them or I’ll end up looking for another offer”.
I am attracted to a man with power, but not so much that I can’t dominate (and manipulate) him
a little. In a therapy session I came up with this pearl: If a man with power falls in love with me, “I
have more power than the one with power. My power is that I dominate the man who has more
power”.
Culturally, power is held by the man. For me, sex is the territory where I can exert control to feel
power. I have used sex life as a bargaining chip and I act on hang-ups and “charge” them in
bed, frustrating, if necessary, the man.
The man is also an object of desire. And through sexuality I feel loved. I want to feel desired, I
am insecure about my desire and I can have difficulty connecting with it (I need the other to
activate it).
Without my desire active, I can play the game of feeling used, but with the satisfaction of being
the one providing the pleasure. I can also victimize myself and then experience the man as the
enemy, the invader, whom I reject and blame as the aggressor and violent, defending the “no” of
women, with the idea of “not selling ourselves to men”.
If I have my desire active, I compete for pleasure, adopting a more masculine role.
The pleasure of contact and intimacy are my weak point. The erotic anticipation of the
encounter permeates my psyche. Eroticism and sensuality are at the service of seduction.
Sexuality need not necessarily be my goal, even if there is sexual provocation and coquetry.
It has been relatively easy for me to cross the barrier of the complicity of friendship into
something more intimate with my friends; going to bed has been a way to maintain the
relationship”. — SONIA GOMA
⠀⠀⠀The person of this character, in fact, more than loving the other, loves herself as a lover, and
love, the strong feeling of being in love. That, as long as the emotion is intense, because
otherwise he doesn't know what emotion he feels.
⠀⠀⠀Seduction is natural to this subtype of Two in that it is based on its underlying ambivalence.
It shows and hides, says “yes” and “no” at the same time, gives and takes, stays and takes,
sucks and bites, loves and destroys. This is the ambiguity of seduction, where is rooted that
fluctuation of attitudes, that fickleness and that sense of force emphatically to the point of
inauthenticity, which emerge in E2 Sexual to testify to a defensive conflict.
⠀⠀⠀And for the other ambivalence, in the pair of opposites activity/passivity. Of the three
subtypes, only the two conservationists exhibit a certain passivity, through a more explicit
dependence on meeting survival needs, while the other two seem more active and independent.
But it is a mask. Below, both the social and, more radically, the sexual E2 are dependent on the
gratifications they receive. And their own exhibitionism can be seen as an expression of this
passivity rather than independence, of ambivalence.
⠀⠀⠀This type of couple relationship has survived in the psyche, along with a proud form of
revenge against authority, which culturally tends to be male, and which it envies and rejects at
the same time, with the usual ambivalence. She seems to like to give, but in reality demands to
get, defying with her motto: « Si je t’aime, prend garde à tois » as fatal Carmen says. She has a
sense of that subterranean hostility that she projects onto the object of her desire: a male to
take and conquer. And she can compete with that male not only by assuming her
aggressiveness disguised as female seduction (cultivating a kind of psychic androgyny), but
also by seducing women, both in her search for an ideal partner and for the pleasure of testing
this other aspect of sexuality in free and unconventional ways.
⠀⠀⠀Often, the E2 Sexual man also had parents in whom the polarity shown is expressed. As in
the following example:
“My mother used to tell me that her husband was proud of her and put her on a pedestal after
she achieved any of the titanic tasks he was so fond of imposing on her. But soon, since she
was not a divine being and was failing at something, he threw her off. My father was like this: he
wanted not only the most beautiful and desired woman, but also the strongest and most
determined, infallible in his eyes. If not, he would punish her without talking to her for weeks on
end”. — LUIS HERNÁNDEZ
⠀⠀⠀Sexual E2 may find that he envies and despises his two parents at the same time, because
he has felt excluded. This painful experience may be expressed in childhood fantasies of not
being his parents’ child, but adopted, secretly, or something similar.
⠀⠀⠀Through seduction, the sexual boy or girl has learned to get a place, an important place.
This is not just a place in the other, but becomes a place in the world. The repeated compulsion
to seduce is a call to be seen, to feel that you control relationships, to feel that you exist. Only
with seduction do you know how to escape the humiliation of not being considered a person and
the abyss of feeling a huge emptiness.
⠀⠀⠀This self-centered generosity is based on a maneuver to hide one’s own need, one’s own
lack. It is always the other who lacks, and one has to give to the other. It is like being a mother
to the poor children of the world, to the people in need. One sees himself in the other and gives
to him: “I have more than enough and you are lacking, and so he covers his own lack with the
other and with himself”.
⠀⠀⠀In this way, E2 disguises his need for love as a false abundance; his sadness, as joy; his
lack of spontaneity, as impulsiveness; his repression, as freedom; his lack of respect for the
other, as excessive attention and submission; and his lack of commitment translates into false
promises.
⠀⠀⠀The interpersonal strategy of the sexual subtype of Two is therefore based on his own
illusions about ways to satisfy his need for love. In their beliefs that:
⠀⠀⠀Regarding this last belief, in reality, what he is is quite incapable of creating affective bonds.
In fact, he seems to aspire to precisely what he is most terrified of: the love relationship, which
cannot be fulfilled if one is not very capable of building bonds that tend toward everyday life and
equality.
⠀⠀⠀And yet, your basic strategy is, as we know, seduction, due to the neurotic need to arouse
desire in others. You know very well that in a world where erotic desire is “sold” on the market
for personal success, it is a great strategy to be desired. And no matter how inwardly aware of
self-deception he is, he cannot give up the secondary advantage of contact magic. His skills
were honed over the years, but he forgot that it was a means and not an end in itself.
⠀⠀⠀The associated irrational ideas are “If they don’t want me intensely they don’t love me or I’m
not worth it” and “If they don’t match me in everything, they don't love me or I'm not worth it”.
⠀⠀⠀As we have been saying, the generosity of Sexual E2 hides motivations that are not as
virtuous as they may seem, because it is in the service of an ego of pseudo-superiority: “I have
to give. When you think of himself, you see superabundance. And it continually offers its
services to cover up your deep sense of not having and being powerless, of lack, of
inconsistency”.
⠀⠀⠀The irrational ideas associated here are “If I show my need they won’t want me”, “If I show
my lack they will realize I am worthless and abandon me” and “Elders give, they don’t show”.
⠀⠀⠀Another strategy, which belongs more to the conservationists, but is present in all E2
subtypes, is to appear as a good boy, a good girl. It is a way of not getting into open conflict, of
not confronting, a kind of implicit pact of non-aggression. Nobody wants to hurt a child, much
less if he is good. This strategy stems from the children's learning to make themselves loved in
this way, hiding the bad child. If the good child is what is socially accepted, the bad child is the
one who has not hyperadapted to the desires of others, erasing his own. The good child doesn't
want, or doesn't seem to want, or wants only “desirable things”. There, the bad boy is repressed
in the shadow of the unconscious, along with his instinct.
⠀⠀⠀The associated irrational ideas are “If you are confrontational and show your anger, they
won’t love you” and “If you show yourself as you are, they won’t love you.”
⠀⠀⠀We have already dealt with seduction, false abundance, self-centered generosity, and denial
of need. Let us now look at other traits that are part of E2 Sexual personality.
⠀⠀⠀Some of them stem from the difficulty of sustaining attacks on his idealized image. This
person finds it difficult to admit her mistakes; she is grumpy to the point of intransigence and
nosy when her pride is touched; and she can become despotic when she perceives that the
other person escapes her.
◯ ◦ Aggressiveness
⠀⠀⠀Sexual Two has difficulty asking. He is unable to ask frankly for fear of appearing human
and not divine, so he lets himself be manipulated or takes a demanding position. He pushes and
invades, takes up more space than his own. And he adopts a posture of narcissistic flattery. The
vital strategy he puts into play evokes obtaining a greater space of attention within his family of
origin.
⠀⠀⠀He is impulsive and his motto is: « Make love and war ». When he goes for a goal he
scrapes, he doesn't look around or know any better he signals his desires, which he confuses
with his real needs. His aggressiveness is expressed in the form of impulse in action. Speak up.
Buy with love or whatever it takes. He sets up scenes and, like E8, the end justifies the means,
and the intensity of the action leads to emotional disconnection, which is why he is sometimes
confused with the lascivious character. All this mechanism hides the difficulty of sustaining
frustration, the limit, the “no” as an insurmountable barrier; a boundary that, by oversizing it,
seems humiliating.
⠀⠀⠀The person of this character can become violent, brazen, and dismissive. In private, having
reached a certain level of frustration, he reacts with indifference or leaves without much
contemplation or suffering for a long time. Compensates for the loss immediately by seducing
another candidate, thus covering up feelings of loss, frustration and pain.
⠀⠀⠀In this attitude it differs from Social E2, who expresses aggression in a more intellectual
way, with arguments and explanations. And, above all, from conservation E2, where
aggressiveness is hidden under a childish halo of tantrums and temper tantrums more than as
explicit violence, and can also turn against itself, according to the gestalt mechanism of
retroflexion. This is something we are unlikely to see in a Sexual E2, fully capable of releasing
the full impulse.
◯ ◦ Hypersensitive
⠀⠀⠀Pride rests on a magnified self-image that sometimes needs to be defended to the world.
When there is confrontation, criticism, or the slightest attack on this image, the pride reaction is
immediate. The volume of the response has little to do with the stimulus, but is due to its
hypersensitivity.
⠀⠀⠀When an arrow goes through the egoic defenses and directly hits the consciousness,
revealing a lie or falsehood, the hyperreactivity explodes, ner. Before allowing himself to be hurt,
before recognizing this truth, he would dismantle his egoic construct, before the slightest scratch
on his self-image, in an automatic impulse he defends himself by attacking. Pride is said to be
an “easy to hurt” emotional state. It is simply the reaction to an old and primary humiliation that
hurt him as a child and left him unable to distinguish between having boundaries, being
criticized, and being humiliated.
⠀⠀⠀The “thin skin” may or may not be conscious, depending on the degree of maturity. But what
differentiates Sexual E2 from the other subtypes is the “spontaneous” compulsiveness of the
reaction, this automatism of maximum “freedom of expression” of the impulse.
⠀⠀⠀The passion of E2 Sexual is to feel passion. Passion to be dragged and swept along in the
intensity of an idealized, genitalized love. Living the drive gives it meaning and strength, so that
it is difficult to give up any desire or to postpone it, especially that of love. Desire becomes an
uninhibited drive that seeks immediate gratification, with whatever manipulative strategies are
necessary. Thus, it is invasive, fickle and impatient, chasing what it does not yet have but
believes it deserves.
⠀⠀⠀The most important desire is the desire to be loved and satisfied, to be special in love. It is
difficult for an E2 Sexual to accept that what he needs most is what he is least willing to give.
What you need is to learn to love. Well, your difficulty lies in loving, committed and deep
dedication.
⠀⠀⠀Look for a kind of love that meets a neurotic need that can never be satisfied. What he lacks
is what he is looking for now he enters unconsciously, and does so by repeating a deficient form
of love based on seduction and the place it gave him by his parents and in his family. The
driving force is to fill the void, that painful feeling that tells you that not everything is so great or
so loving, that borders on envy and puts the entire egoic structure at risk.
⠀⠀⠀Someone so wild and impulsive needs freedom. There is a lack of limits, a pleasure in
transgressing the rules, in the name of feeling more than thinking. As a Sexual E2 says: “For
me, slogans are just guidelines”.
⠀⠀⠀There is in this character a phobia of feeling the limits imposed from the outside. His
dependence on the emotional state of the moment gives him an air of freedom that can be
mistaken for true spontaneity and that, in reality, responds to a difficulty in giving up the
immediate gratification of the impulse. This is why it seems incongruous and irresponsible.
The E2 Sexual is already accustomed since childhood to getting what he wants, as an echo of
the Oedipal situation in which he reached a place of intimacy with the opposite sex parent. A
place that did not belong to him and that he achieved through seduction — ambiguously
induced by that same parent —, while displacing the same-sex parent, with whom he usually
maintains a conflictive relationship.
⠀⠀⠀He is the wildest and freest of the Two. Much more than the conservative E2, without going
any further, who adopts a childish posture by giving up much of his freedom to obtain the
privilege of his parents, and has to be more of a good boy or a good girl, which entails a greater
loss of his free and spontaneous impulse.
⠀⠀⠀Freedom, or rather feeling “free” is related to this lack of limits that were never placed on
him, or that came from an excessive authority that he seduced to overcome his fear of being
crushed, of death.
◯ ◦ Dependent
⠀⠀⠀Apparently independent, he flags a freedom that he mistakes for debauchery. But in reality,
he is a hidden and disguised dependent; with an indescribable dependence on himself because
he would break his idealized image. He needs the other to confirm him. And also that contact,
affective and carnal, where he gets what he wants.
⠀⠀⠀In denying the lack, the person’s reason for going to therapy is usually a couple crisis, when
he feels abandoned and the building that supports his pride crumbles.
◯ ◦ Histrionic
⠀⠀⠀Nowadays the word “ histrionic” is used to define the whole emotional staging of the E2
character, and especially the E2 Sexual, who specializes in dramatizing emotions. He is also
called “hysterical”, in the sense of intensely emotional and impulsive: the emotional is far ahead
of the rational, and he tends to “emotional outbursts”, but histrionic is more precise and refers to
his theatricality.
⠀⠀⠀This emotional staging may have nothing to do with his deep motivations. It is just a
performance to achieve something else, while hiding the real need that triggered the energetic
mobilization. It is often unconscious, because every motivation or feeling has to do with an
aspect of deficiency, something that does not fit into their expanded self-image, so it is relegated
to the unconscious through the main mechanism of E2: Repression. Although staging is typical
of the Two in general, the theatrical, expansive and aggressive capacity of the Sexual E2 makes
it the most outrageous and brazen subtype.
⠀⠀⠀The most impetuous personalities are even more capable of expressing anger and struggle,
in an emotional catharsis like the one experienced by the actor in the climactic scene. In
seduction, they can reach the highest levels of creativity and expressive richness: feline rhythm,
a submissive gaze that wants to penetrate the other, a mixture of sweetness and strength,
warmth and instinct, great freedom in physical contact, a natural uninhibition to show
themselves naked, and all those expressions of eroticism that give them enormous pleasure.
⠀⠀⠀E2 experiences the painful feeling of being a fraudster, which makes him feel false and
therefore guilty. One outlet is disinhibition and transgression of social rules, not as a result of
real autonomy of judgment and action, but as an expression of the neurotic need to stand out, to
gain the admiration of others, to arouse their interest.
⠀⠀⠀The sexual subtype takes him into the field of erotic-affective relationships, even triangular
ones. He sees himself as the repository of new social rules through sexual freedom, with a
demonstration of vitality and a feeling of superiority over the more common relationship bonds.
⠀⠀⠀It is not difficult for the E2 Sexual to advocate triumphs of the libido, even provocatively and
scandalously to common sense, as a form of narcissistic self-satisfaction.
⠀⠀⠀He needs to feel exalted by relationships where he imagines himself at the center of the
other’s desires, and intensely affective, without which he would feel barren, empty, threatened
by isolation, and dangerously sad. All this with the fantasy that it is others who need his
generous welcome, when in reality it is he who needs to feel continually reassured about his
worth.
◯ ◦ Hedonist
⠀⠀⠀The E2 Sexual is hedonistic; his pursuit of pleasure is in the service of escaping pain and
any situation that potentially carries a frustration that he cannot tolerate. How can anyone say
no to you? Or not respond to his need to be adored!
⠀⠀⠀By not facing the limit, he can entangle the other in a persistent promise of pleasure. These
seduction games satisfy both Sexual E2 hedonism and his need to break routine with new
experiences. As Claudio Naranjo points out, the desire for pleasure can be considered a
substitute for it; and E2, so in need of eliminating from his life all that is problematic, troubling, or
unsatisfying, seeks it through love. His low tolerance for frustration, when he doesn't feel loved,
leads him to states of anger or agitation that, in turn, serve to break the dreaded routine.
⠀⠀⠀Hedonism makes him a consumer of relationships and objects, as he surrenders to his
intense desire to give and obtain pleasure.
⠀⠀⠀The sexual E2 is a grandiose and inflated self-image. Radiant and magnificent in fantasy, it
is not grounded in reality by fact. It is a dream, but a contagious dream that convinces not only
oneself, but also others. It is different from the narcissism of the E3, whose image selling is
backed by titles, by a schedule full of specific things to do, by hours in the gym, by a large
closet, or by disproportionate spending on cosmetics or cosmetic surgery.
⠀⠀⠀The image of a vampire, a Femme Fatale, who needs to be loved and attracted, is the
compensatory ideal for a childhood wound. And the energy invested in not crumbling this
idealized image is what causes a disconnect from the depths of her being.
⠀⠀⠀It is a theatrical image, a staging with all the attributes of a lie, made up of intimate music in
the tone of voice, provocation in the seductive gestures and clothing, and an ability to look
suspiciously as exaggerated.
◯ ◦ Inconsequential
⠀⠀⠀In this discrepancy between reality and self-image, the E2 Sexual imagines himself to be
bigger, more generous and more helpful than he is.
⠀⠀⠀He lives too much in the present to remember what he promised the day before yesterday.
He tells you: « I will help you » with such and such a thing. Or: « You know that you can count
on me ». Or: « I will support you in everything you do ». But when the time comes, the promise
doesn't translate into concrete things. It is more a feeling that existed at that moment, the result
of an emotionalized impulse that is holding an image. And when the time comes, it's not so
much the service rendered.
⠀⠀⠀Someone who feels so superior to others believes that he has much to give in every way.
One who continuously runs away from pain and seeks pleasure through love cannot show that
precisely this, love, he does not have. On the contrary, he shows himself to be a great giver of
love.
⠀⠀⠀Given or sense of superiority of the proud, his high principles about life, love and
relationships lead him to see himself as a moral marvel, then he stops taking into account the
consequences of his actions and how he is reality.
⠀⠀⠀But how does he turn his need for love into the ability to give love? Says psychoanalyst
Karen Horney:
⠀⠀⠀His need to be proud of himself is so imperative that he cannot tolerate the idea of being in
the grip of his own needs; so he uses his imagination to transform his needs into virtues, to turn
them into qualities to be proud of. But only the compulsive needs that serve his tendency to
make his idealized image come true undergo such a transformation.
⠀⠀⠀In structuring himself as a character, his need for affection and to feel himself the center is
transformed into giving love, into caring. And in all this giving, one thought never leaves him: he
expects others to recognize what he does for them. In his aggrandizement, he puts his attention
on what he is doing for the other more than on what he will receive. It’s a continuous effort to be
seen by others, and with such a high self-esteem that the recognition they expect never comes,
which guarantees persistent frustration.
⠀⠀⠀This effort is a characteristic of E2 Sexual, which contributes to his being able to walk with
his head held high, thus evoking the subterranean idea of undeserving from his humiliated inner
counterpart.
◯ ◦ Anti-intellectual
⠀⠀⠀Sexual E2 is the most emotional. Sexual E4, also a specialist in dramatic and intense
emotional manifestations, has, however, a more intellectual component, because to exercise
competence he needs argumentation. In Sexual Two, the undisputable argument is his emotion:
things are a certain way “Because I feel that way”. This is his assertiveness, based more on his
feelings than on the cognitive and which, in his uninhibited drive, gives him a false sense of
security and the arrogance of achieving everything.
⠀⠀⠀His reading of reality is based, therefore, more on feelings than on the objective view of
facts; emotion contaminates everything in the present moment, and in the name of emotion
anything goes. He passionately identifies with emotion and is disinterested in the logical and
structured world of thought, which seems heavy and dry to him.
⠀⠀⠀Cognitive or intellectual ability is devalued in all Two. True, somewhat less so in the Social
E2s, who create an image of being responsible, serious and hyper-adult. Conservationists,
closely identified with basic needs, are the most interested in concrete action to get what they
need. Sexual E2 also feels more than he thinks, and values the emotional and sentimental
world much more than the cognitive. An attitude that is at the origin of their main defense
mechanism: repression.
◯ ◦ Competitive
⠀⠀⠀The field of competition for the sexual Two is above all the sentimental relationship. Your
struggle to feel unique and unforgettable becomes difficult the moment a third party comes
along and can overshadow you. In that case, you can return to a passionate and passionate
energy, even if it is little or unclear whether you really care about the object you compete for.
Nor do you wonder if you are really interested in that lover or friend, because your interest is in
beating the competitor to feel the best in whoever's eyes. He feels your passion again and
believes it, but once the prize is won, it may no longer have any value.
◯ ◦ Unconventional
⠀⠀⠀E2 Sexual gestures are open, informal and relaxed. He seems spontaneous and loose,
feels at home everywhere, and takes up space by breaking in. Being unconventional is his
characteristic, both in dress and behavior, as he breaks with schemes, being different from
others at all costs. He is capable of doing in public what others would do only in private, such as
taking off his shoes, putting his feet up on the sofa, showing a scar on his private part, sleeping
in the middle of a meeting or something similar, going beyond social conventions. He wants to
do what he wants “where he wants, with whom a tease gives me so much, sweetened by his
seductive strategies and he wins”. It’s because of the fear of being rejected.
⠀⠀⠀The body of the proud personality was described by Wilhelm Reich, in Character Analysis:
“Its most striking characteristic is overt sexual behavior, combined with a specific type of bodily
agility tinged with a definitely sexual tone. [...] In the typical case, the movements are smooth
and sexually provocative. The overall impression is one of easy excitability”.
⠀⠀⠀The body movement of the Sexual E2 is to speak of the graceful and sensual movements of
a body with few deep muscle blocks. Its body structure is well energized and shapes
well-proportioned and harmonious bodies. It feels integrated and connected, conveying a sense
of activity, aliveness, and agility.
⠀⠀⠀The energy reaches the most distal parts of the body, giving the skin a warm, rosy
appearance. The bright, lively gaze denotes the emotional state the person is in, a trait shared
with the other rigid characters of the bioenergetic classification.
⠀⠀⠀This body defense mechanism is triggered before the imminent appearance of distress, as
this woman reports:
“I couldn’t stop moving, I felt an energy that went through my whole body, it carried me, moved
me without going anywhere if I was a caged animal, my mother told me she was hysterical, but I
couldn't do anything. When I stopped I felt a strong emotion in my chest, a very unpleasant
feeling, and I started to cry inconsolably”. — ANONYMOUS
⠀⠀⠀We see in the statement how the failure of muscular defense makes the anguish appear
and, in this case, the retained emotion that makes it sustain itself. This effective drain means
that the E2, and especially the Sexual E2, rarely overcomes the anxiety. This is converted into
smooth, undulating movements, charged with eroticism and which often confuse the
interlocutor, who receives a double message: on the one hand, of provocation; on the other, not
being responsible for the intentionality of the movement, which is removed from consciousness
by the psychic defense mechanism of the repress.
⠀⠀⠀Its erotic and seductive movement provokes sexual reactions when in reality this is not its
function.
⠀⠀⠀This sensual and undulating movement, provided by the muscular defense of the “chain
mail”, allows us to establish a differential diagnosis with other characters that do not possess
such representative agility and mobility.
⠀⠀⠀Juanjo Albert says, speaking of the hysterical character (eneatype Two): « The defensive
function of the erotic pseudocontact and genital sexuality is realized through its specialization
and training to detect the risk of commitment and emotional surrender, and withdraw
immediately when this happens ».
⠀⠀⠀The most extreme form of an E2 Sexual march is the spitting image of the vamp, whose
seduction is conveyed not only by her sinuous and exaggerated movements, but also by the
tone of her voice, the emphasis of her phrasing, her captivating gaze, her expressed
voluptuousness, and the swaying of her hips, which suggests a promise of assurance.
⠀⠀⠀This typical contouring, as well as the retracted hip position, may signify health and
connection to sexuality, but in reality it does not. The “charging pelvis” of two is energetically
ready to express its force through orgasm, but unloading movements are limited by its rigidity,
with reduced anterior pelvic displacement.
◯ ◦ Joyful
⠀⠀⠀Compared to the other subtypes of pride passion, the sexual displays a look of contentment
and expansive joy. There it differs from the social E2, whose expression is less static, a bit more
serious and rigid, due to the feeling of importance that invades it.
⠀⠀⠀This same joy and smile of the Sexual E2 is accompanied, in the conservation subtype, by a
boyish look and face, which often makes him look younger than he is.
⠀⠀⠀Money gives this character crucial autonomy. Here too, the E2 Sexual depends on his own
resources: showing his economic needs humiliates him, and his independence is more a
gesture of pride than of inner freedom.
⠀⠀⠀Economic resources are subordinated to emotional ones and the need for intimate contact.
E2 Sexual shows disregard for saving or possessing possessions. It may have to do with a
basic arrogance and the need for immediate satisfaction in the intensity of the moment.
Therefore, he tends to spend what he earns, but more on others than on himself.
⠀⠀⠀Carelessness can lead to not managing money, not checking your accounts, not knowing
how much you earn, or not paying off loans.
⠀⠀⠀The power that Sexual E2 entrusts to money is therefore to be in the service of meaningful
relationships, to receive affection and admiration in return. The way to obtain them ranges from
generously offering his children's wishes to giving wonderful gifts to his partner or friends, and
thus feeling good and making the other feel like the center of his attention. He even puts his
own survival at risk by following a romantic ideal of generosity, which takes precedence over
any other consideration.
⠀⠀⠀Because of his hunger for love, the E2 Sexual takes more pleasure in giving and spending
than in withholding or possessing. For him, the pride of “giving” is an overcompensation of lack,
of the painful feeling of worthlessness. This is what leads him to exaggerate. Under the mask of
abundance, the counterpart of the miserable beggar manifests itself through the phantom of the
fall. It is precisely this opposite that leads to excessive self-denial: if he does not feel that he
deserves love for himself, he makes sure that he at least deserves it for services rendered.
⠀⠀⠀In his relationship dynamics, where he is the giver rather than the receiver, Sexual E2 finds
it hard to imagine that someone else could take care of him if needed. Of his pride he can
demand, but not ask, because a refusal would do him great harm. This, along with the need for
freedom and autonomy, fosters the ghost of failure, because unable to give, they will have no
place in the world, they imagine that if they are unable to give, they will have no place, they will
be alone.