Episode 8 Page 1

SCENE 1

NICHOLAS: Are you ready?

CHRISTINE: Yeah, let’s take a listen.

SFX: Christine plugs in the tape and pushes play

SFX: Tape starts

SFX: Door opening

NICHOLAS: Is it in here?

CHRISTINE: (Not on tape) Damnit, I remember this

NICHOLAS: (Not on tape) Just let it play

CHRISTINE: Dude, I don’t know this house at all.

NICHOLAS: I’m just going to assume it’s his study, from the desk. And the… obsidian bust of
himself.

CHRISTINE: Ugh. That sounds about right.

NICHOLAS: Do you see the stereo anywhere?

CHRISTINE: Nope!

SFX: Footsteps, Nicholas nosing around

NICHOLAS: Hmmmm...

CHRISTINE: Welp, I guess we did our due diligence or whatever, let’s tear down this shithole
and sell the land for condos.

NICHOLAS: Christine.

CHRISTINE: Oh no, have I not showed enough reverence for the dead? That did not want to
acknowledge me at all? Nooooo… He was so kind and loving and I definitely had a fulfilling
relationship with him.

NICHOLAS: I’m not… arguing about the type of person he was, but-
 Episode 8 Page 2

CHRISTINE: But nothing! This will thing was a request. We already own the house and I really
want to see a wrecking ball destroy it. We can listen to angry punk music, it’ll be cathartic.

NICHOLAS: And then we’ll sell the tiny, miniscule plot of land to developers.

CHRISTINE: Dude, it’s New York real estate, they’re probably trying to clear this whole block
for condos. If you don’t want to tear it down, we can sell it to some douchey finance couple
whose kids are named Hunter and Wesley.

NICHOLAS: I’m sure Hunter and Wesley would appreciate the rich history of the brownstone.

(A beat)

NICHOLAS: If this wasn’t dad’s house, I might like to live here.

CHRISTINE: Yeah, it’s a nice place.

NICHOLAS: Oh!

SFX: Footsteps, drawers opening

NICHOLAS: Here it is! It’s part of the desk.

(A beat)

NICHOLAS: Are you alright with me playing it?

CHRISTINE: Whatever. It’ll just be a couple minutes.

NICHOLAS: Thank you. Even if he… anyway. The tape’s… already in, so…

SFX: Button pushes, tape starts

FATHER: Hello. If you’re listening to this I am, regrettably, deceased. If you played a part in my
death, I ask that… [sighs] fuck. I’ll

SFX: Tape cut

FATHER: Sorry about that. Nicholas… this is difficult for me, you have to understand. I...

CHRISTINE: And he didn’t mention me. Of course.

FATHER: I… know I wasn’t always there for you, but… I’m sorry… [sighs] dammit
 Episode 8 Page 3

SFX: Tape cut

FATHER: There, I’ll try again. Nicholas, you are almost certainly uninterested in my apologies.

NICHOLAS: Well, he’s right about that.

FATHER: I have not been there for you in any way, shape, or form. And at this point, there is
nothing I can do about that. However...

CHRISTINE: [sighs]

FATHER: You are my son. And that means something, whether you choose to accept that fact
or not. There are parts of you that are… like me. For better or worse. You know, I’ve heard…
recordings of you. Online. You sound just like my father, you know that? Not… the way he
spoke. But the voice… the voice is the same. Your sister sounds like… you know, I didn’t really
know my parents either? Not really. Oscar was… [sighs]

SFX: Tape cut

FATHER: You have an inheritance, not just the house, not just the tapes, but… a legacy. A way
of seeing the world. If you don’t mind, I’m going to play something for-

SFX: Christine stops the tape

(A beat)

NICHOLAS: Christine?

CHRISTINE: We can just go. That’s an option. You don’t have to listen to the rest of this. I
mean… screw this dude.

(A beat)

CHRISTINE: Nick?

NICHOLAS: Nicholas, please.

CHRISTINE: Sorry.

NICHOLAS: When my mom talked about him, which was rare, she… there are aspects of my
dad that I know I have. Traits, little tics, I resemble him too much. I don’t know. I would like to
hear what he has to say. You’re welcome to leave, if you would like. This seems like it was
directed at me. You’re welcome to stay, too, if...
 Episode 8 Page 4

CHRISTINE: Yeah, if you’re hearing this, I want to hear this.

SFX: Christine resumes the tape.

FATHER: -play something for you. I hope you will find it illuminating.

MUSIC: Music box tune starts to play

CHRISTINE: What the hell-

SFX: Tape weirdness

SFX: Montage of ocean sounds, music box music, and tape static.

FATHER: If you would like to discuss, feel free to-

SFX: Tape stops

CHRISTINE: What… was that? Did you see it too? Did you see it too?

NICHOLAS: I don’t… know, what did you see?

CHRISTINE: This… ocean. With these weird ships on it. It was just… quick, but it felt so real.
Like… that wasn’t LSD, you know? That was… did you see the ocean?

NICHOLAS: No… I didn’t see anything. But I felt… there was power and knowledge and… I’m
not sure exactly how to describe it.

(A beat)

CHRISTINE: What the hell, what the hell, what the hell?

NICHOLAS: You were right, we can just leave. We can sell this place to developers or
gentrifiers and… perhaps it was something we ate. What did you have at the funeral?

CHRISTINE: Dude, Nick, Nicholas… I know what I felt. I don’t know what that was, but it was
real. Come on.

SFX: Christine resumes the tape.

FATHER: -to pause the tape. I’m guessing that you have questions. But there are no answers.
In a sense, you are being born again, into a new way of looking at the world. The tapes in this
study contain… instructions. Follow some of the instructions if you would like proof. I have left
some work unfinished. There is a red tape in this desk. Once you are ready to continue my
 Episode 8 Page 5

work, listen to the tape. And start recording. Unfortunately, I do not have more to offer you.
That’s… not new, I suppose.

SFX: Tape ends.

SCENE 2

(A beat)

CHRISTINE: What a gigantic asshole. Why couldn’t he… goddamnit.

(A beat)

NICHOLAS: I’m sorry Christine. Do you… want to listen to the tapes?

CHRISTINE: I don’t know… maybe? What do you think.

NICHOLAS: I’m… not quite sure.

(A beat)

SFX: Footsteps

NICHOLAS: What in the…

CHRISTINE: What is that?

NICHOLAS: It’s some sort of… recorder

SFX: Tape weirdness

MUSIC: Maybe a slight musical sting

DAN: You are close to the end. You are purified and ready. You know what this ritual requires.

SFX: Tape weirdness, jumbled up pieces of this season play until coalescing into:

FATHER: Lay a tarp upon the ground. Stick the sheet of music into the dream ambergris, and
place the dream ambergris upon the tarp, and then sprinkle the gold and darkness dust upon
the dream ambergris. Burn all of this while chanting your name and then the phrase “will be
redeemed in this world and the next.” Both participants must chant. While you’re doing this, a
song-

SFX: Tape weirdness

 Episode 8 Page 6

DAN: Now all you need is the song that I must play. The sheet music. Melody Pendras will know
where it is. Find her again.

SFX: Tape ends

(A beat)

NICHOLAS: How long has it been?

CHRISTINE: Fifty years. Feels like. Dad’s still an asshole though.

NICHOLAS: Yeah. I understand him a bit more, but… yeah.

CHRISTINE: You have any idea how to find Melody again?

NICHOLAS: I tried to keep tabs on her, after the first time, but she’s… gone.

CHRISTINE: So… payphone doesn’t sound like it’s an option.

NICHOLAS: Yeah, sorry about that.

CHRISTINE: I mean… I don’t have to worry about that weirdass bargain I made. Thanks for
that, if I get my heart broken, I want it to be my own damn fault. Got any rituals that could find
her?

NICHOLAS: The only location ritual dad had was one to find “your greatest enemy”

CHRISTINE: Which just says a shit-ton about dad.

NICHOLAS: We could try and find an enemy of Melody… but the ritual requires trust, so that’s
most likely an awful idea.

CHRISTINE: I mean… I know we’ve been using him a lot, but Static Man owes you, right?

NICHOLAS: I certainly trust him more than Ms. Roland.

CHRISTINE: Yeah, I can’t think of anyone else.

(A beat)

NICHOLAS: Do you want to get the Popeye’s, or should I?

CHRISTINE: Eh, let’s just order some on UberEats.

 Episode 8 Page 7

SFX: Tape turns off

TAPE BREAK

SCENE 3

SFX: Tape turns on

CHRISTINE: Everything ready?

NICHOLAS: Yes. I’ll call him.

SFX: Phone dialing

SFX: Magic weirdness

STATIC MAN: Oh, hey dudes, that didn’t take long.

CHRISTINE: You know us, compulsive as hell.

STATIC MAN: Awwww man, are those biscuits fresh?

SFX: Static man starts chowing down on delicious Popeye’s chicken. Popeyes, Louisiana Fast.

NICHOLAS: We had them delivered. Late period capitalism is wonderful.

STATIC MAN: I’m all about that gig economy.

CHRISTINE: You doing alright? Nicholas told me what happened.

STATIC MAN: It really really really sucks. But… I probably would have killed Payphone even I
wasn’t going to get my body back and… being static-y isn’t completely bad. Still miss my, you
know, genitals, but...

CHRISTINE: Uh…

STATIC MAN: Yeah, so I just got to be on the hunt for a ritual that gives me back my body. Or
lets me grow a new one. Or lets me possess someone. Get Linda Blair’s body. If you two aren’t
too busy after you finish [burst of static] I’ll probs ask you for some help.

NICHOLAS: We would be amenable to that.

STATIC MAN: Cool. So what’s up?

 Episode 8 Page 8

NICHOLAS: Would you have any idea how to locate Melody Pendras?

STATIC MAN: Shit, you trying to kill her?

CHRISTINE: No! We just need to ask her a couple questions.

STATIC MAN: Like, “ask her a couple questions” and maybe she gets out with all her fingers
intact or-

NICHOLAS: We have no intention of harming her.

STATIC MAN: Probably a good idea. Yeah, no idea where Melody is.

CHRISTINE: Well shit.

STATIC MAN: However… give me that iPhone.

SFX: Static Man dials a few numbers

STATIC MAN: I’m putting this on speakerphone

SCENE 4

SFX: Rings

CHRISTINE: Wait, who are you-

ALEXA: This is Alexa Pendras, who am I speaking to?

STATIC MAN: Alexa, it’s Static Man, knife in the winter all that shit. What’s up?

(A beat)

ALEXA: I told you not to call this number.

STATIC MAN: Hey hey hey, wait. Just wait a minute. Did Melody tell you about Nick and
Christine? The ritualists that are going for the [burst of static]?

(A beat)

ALEXA: She may have.

STATIC MAN: Well… these people need to see Melody again. Say hi Nick and Christine
 Episode 8 Page 9

CHRISTINE: Hi

NICHOLAS: Hello

STATIC MAN: So… anyway we can make that happen?

ALEXA: Melody told you not to contact her again.

NICHOLAS: We realize that. But the person who’s been listening to the tapes, Melody called
him Dan, told us to contact her again, so…

CHRISTINE: We thought she might like to know.

(A beat)

ALEXA: That… might actually make a difference to her.

(A beat)

STATIC MAN: Come on Alexa, I’d consider it a favor.

(A beat)

ALEXA: I’ll tell her. I’ll text you the address if she agrees. Delete the number.

STATIC MAN: See, I knew-

SFX: Phone hangs up

SCENE 5

CHRISTINE: You think Melody will want to meet with us?

STATIC MAN: Yeah dude, if your weird monster godhead said it’s the next step, it’s the next
step.

NICHOLAS: What did you do for Alexa, by the way?

STATIC MAN: What I always do. Stop people from bothering other people. Anyway, peace
dudes, I’m gonna jet. Keep your eye out for like, a possession ritual.

CHRISTINE: Will do.

 Episode 8 Page 10

SFX: Weird magical Static man noise

SFX: text message sound

CHRISTINE: I guess we’re visiting Melody Pendras.

SFX: Tape turns off

TAPE BREAK MUSIC

SCENE 6

SFX: Tape turns on

SFX: Dronebox is going at a steady clip.

MELODY: -start recording. The ritual was slightly modified, so you should have more time in
my… residence.

NICHOLAS: And can we take off the blindfolds?

MELODY: No. Leave on the blindfolds. I can’t stress how important that is.

CHRISTINE: Any particular reason why?

MELODY: You aren’t attuned to this place. You might get lost forever in a liminal state.

NICHOLAS: Noted.

MELODY: Come on, follow me. Hold hands, I’ll guide you.

SFX: Shuffling

NICHOLAS: Are you alright, Christine?

CHRISTINE: Yeah, about as good as can be expected.

MELODY: Come on.

SFX: Footsteps, cavernous

MELODY: Did Dan say anything else?

CHRISTINE: No, he just said that you’d know where the song was.
 Episode 8 Page 11

MELODY: The more weirdness you’re exposed to, the more cryptic you get. Just so I make
myself clear, you’re going to forget about Alexa, OK?

CHRISTINE: Understood

NICHOLAS: Alright

MELODY: Tell your friend as well. Even if they don’t like it, Alexa is 100 percent off limits. To all
of this.

(A beat)

NICHOLAS: What is this place? If you don’t mind me asking?

CHRISTINE: Yeah, I’d love some visual description.

MELODY: I’m not going to give you any. But the part I’m leading you towards is the archive.

CHRISTINE: And the part you aren’t leading us toward?

MELODY: Is none of your business. Now, stand here. And try not to think violent thoughts.

SFX: Warming up sound

MUSIC: A short, sweet melody plays

MELODY: So, turns out you’re not trying to kill me. Great. Here’s my hand, follow.

SFX: Large door opening

MELODY: Yeah, it’s basically just a broom closet. The door sound makes it seem like it should
be more impressive.

CHRISTINE: We literally couldn’t tell either way.

SFX: Melody clicks and clacks through the archive.

MELODY: I don’t have it written down… but I know what tape it is… here. You’re probably used
to this, but… you want to listen to a cassette?

NICHOLAS: As always… yes.

MELODY: And… here we are. Sit down, I don’t want to keep holding your hands.
 Episode 8 Page 12

SFX: They sit down

SFX: Tape is put into tape player, tape begins.

SCENE 7

SFX: Recorder turns on

SFX: Clattering A/C

VIOLET: So… you’re the one who gave me this?

MELODY: I’m sorry about what happened to your mother, I really am, but… I had no idea that it
would be… passed on.

VIOLET: Doctor’s called it a genetic condition. Unrelated to my mom’s burns. Just a

coincidence.

MELODY: Violet… I didn’t burn your mother’s face. That was Samuel.

VIOLET: Yeah. Honestly, I can’t really tell the difference between all you assholes that deal
with… whatever it is you deal with. Doesn’t really matter what your intentions are, still standing
in a desert, reciting the Bhagavad Gita.

(A beat)

MELODY: I… can understand how it might look like that. Would you mind if we turned the A/C
off, it’s not great for the recording.

VIOLET: Nah, A/C’s set via computer. They’ve got an algorithm for it.

MELODY: Ah. Do you enjoy your job here, Violet?

VIOLET: I mean, it’s slow? Not too many people come in here, so it’s chill. You know this store
isn’t supposed to make a profit? They built it right next to some mom and pop shops so they
could force ‘em out of the business. Not trying to sell anything here, just trying to price the other
guys out. Long term strategy. We don’t work on commission but still… depressing. And the
khaki makes me look awful. Plus… recorders, cassette tapes... who still needs that shit, it’s the
goddamn 21st century.

MELODY: You might be surprised.

VIOLET: So no, this isn’t exactly a great time, Melody Pendras.

 Episode 8 Page 13

MELODY: Well, do you have any goals? Anything you do in your spare time?

VIOLET: Listen, just ask me what you want to ask me, ok? We don’t have to do small talk.

MELODY: I really want to hear how you’re doing.

VIOLET: I’m doing fine.

(A beat)

MELODY: [sighs] Has anything suspicious happened in the past couple months? Has anyone
followed you, tried to talk to you? Have you felt unsafe?

VIOLET: There it is. And no, I haven’t felt unsafe. Not after I told them where to find my mom.

(A beat)

MELODY: What?

VIOLET: You heard me.

SFX: Violet gets out a cigarette

VIOLET: You want a cigarette, or no?

MELODY: No thank you. Violet… who did you tell about your mother? And why would you do
that?

SFX: Violet starts smoking

VIOLET: Who do you think? The cult. The people that want to put a stop to all this freaky
bullshit. And I told them because they want to cut down on people like you and my mom and
Samuel. And because my mother is… was a genuinely awful human being.

MELODY: Do you know what happened to your mother?

VIOLET: No. And I don’t care. They’re going to ignore me from now on. They promised.

MELODY: And you believed them?

VIOLET: I mean… they haven’t killed me yet. And I signed a contract, they made me go to their
HQ to sign basically a thousand pages.
 Episode 8 Page 14

MELODY: Where were their headquarters located?

VIOLET: 808 Central Park West.

MELODY: Ah.

(A beat)

MELODY: If you don’t mind me asking… why are you telling me all this? I’m not pressuring you.

VIOLET: You’re not pressuring me yet.

MELODY: I wouldn’t-

VIOLET: I think you would. But no, without you saving my mom, I wouldn’t have been born. So
thank you. I guess.

(A beat)

MELODY: You’re welcome.

VIOLET: You got any more questions for me, Melody Pendras?

MELODY: Unless you would like to tell me anything else?

VIOLET: Nah, unless you want to buy any of our fine RadioMart products, I think we’re good.

MELODY: I actually might want some blank cassettes.

VIOLET: [sighs] Follow me.

SFX: Tape turns off

SCENE 8

CHRISTINE: So… the song’s at 808 Central Park West?

MELODY: Yeah, unfortunately for you.

(A beat)

NICHOLAS: Can you… tell us anything else?

 Episode 8 Page 15

MELODY: Listen. Violet… has a point. Messing with this type of… reality is not a good idea. It
almost doesn’t matter what your intentions are. I try to make sure people who are affected by
people like you two are ok. That they’re safe.

CHRISTINE: Isn’t that the whole point of the cult, or whatever? That they hate weirdness?

MELODY: Yeah, but they take everything too far. Anyone who has been affected by this has to
be… amputated. Like cutting off an infected hand.

NICHOLAS: Wait… but they hired someone who could warp doorways.

MELODY: You can justify anything to yourself if you believe you’re doing it for the right reasons.
But, on to what you’re really interested in. They collect all of the artifacts, all of the weirdness
they can find, and they put them in their vault. That’s where your sheet music will be. And no,
before you ask any questions, I don’t know anything else. But I assume everything’s guarded.
Now... are we done here?

NICHOLAS: I…

MELODY: Good. Now, get up slowly, I don’t want you to…

SFX: Shuffling, clattering

SFX: Cloth rustling

SFX: Magical weirdness

NICHOLAS: What’s…

CHRISTINE: Hey, what’s going on?

MELODY: Oh shit, they’re trying to get your blindfold! Nicholas, whatever you do, don’t-

SFX: Super magical weirdness.

MELODY: (super distorted and echo-y)

MUSIC: Weird droning in the background

SFX: Echoey footsteps

NICHOLAS: Hey! Hey! Where am I? Why can’t I… where is everyone? Hey!

SFX: His hey echoes into the darkness

 Episode 8 Page 16

NICHOLAS: Oh no… oh no…

CHRISTINE: Nicholas! Nicholas! Can you hear me?

NICHOLAS: Chris! Where are you, why can’t I see you?

CHRISTINE: OK, OK, you’re there, (to Melody) yeah, yeah I can hear him

NICHOLAS: Christine! Please! Do you know what’s going on?

CHRISTINE: Melody says she’ll try and explain everything. We don’t have much time, but I love
you, OK? Stay safe?

NICHOLAS: Christine! I-

SFX: Shuffling

MELODY: She’s right, we don’t have a lot of time.

NICHOLAS: Melody, tell me what’s going on!

MELODY: I… tell me what you see.

NICHOLAS: Just… a stone floor, stretching forever. There’s absolutely nothing here, no ceiling-

MELODY: You weren’t prepared to see the place I live. Your mind… reacted. You’re now in
an… in-between state.

NICHOLAS: Did… Aleister send me here?

MELODY: No… Aleister doesn’t have anything to do with this. This is… the continent where he
is trying to build his creation. I don’t know how the blindfold disintegrated, but-

NICHOLAS: (muttering to himself) Goddamn… the bargain with the payphone. Alright, you said
we don’t have time. How do I get out of here?

MELODY: You… walk.

NICHOLAS: What, that’s it?

MELODY: This is a… place of in-between things. You have to find a way to move forward, I
can’t…
 Episode 8 Page 17

SFX: Her voice fades away

SFX: Weirdness

SCENE 9

NICHOLAS: Melody! Melody! Christine?

(A beat)

NICHOLAS: Dammit.

SFX: Footsteps, go on for a long time

SFX: Very faintly, in the distance, the second episode of the Golden Age starts to play

NICHOLAS: Hello, who’s there? I can hear you!

SFX: Footsteps get faster

NICHOLAS: Hello?

SFX: The episode gradually gets louder

NICHOLAS: Is that… a radio?

SFX: Episode gets even louder

SFX: Footsteps get even faster

NICHOLAS: Hey! It’s just..

SFX: Nicholas kicks the radio

SFX: Golden age episode skips a bit

NICHOLAS: Hello! Please! Does this radio belong to someone? Come on…

SFX: Nicholas desperately starts pressing buttons, radio starts skipping, acting weird

NICHOLAS: Please! Just-

SFX: Radio explodes in a fountain of weirdness

 Episode 8 Page 18

SFX: A small study. A clock ticks in the background

NICHOLAS: [gasping]

ALTERNATE NICHOLAS: (talking on the phone) The calf hearts are simply non-negotiable. No,
I don’t care about-

NICHOLAS: Can you… hear me?

ALTERNATE NICHOLAS: Of course I can hear you. (To the phone) I apologize, I… I’m going to
have to call you back.

NICHOLAS: Are you… where am I?

ALTERNATE NICHOLAS: I have neither the time, nor the mental resources to explain this to
you. You’re stuck in a liminal state, correct?

NICHOLAS: I… believe so.

ALTERNATE NICHOLAS: Wonderful. You know I have other obligations, I can’t simply drop
everything to cater to your every whim.

NICHOLAS: I wasn’t expecting you to-

ALTERNATE NICHOLAS: You were though, weren’t you? Always expecting everyone to save
you. Even if it seems like it’s all about you… it isn’t. Not really.

NICHOLAS: What does that mean?

ALTERNATE NICHOLAS: [sighs] Please. Stop talking.

(A beat)

ALTERNATE NICHOLAS: Thank you. Now, you should probably get moving.

SFX: Tape weirdness

SFX: Teleportation

SFX: Falls down on the floor

NICHOLAS: [gasping]

SFX: in the distance, a cello is heard, faintly

 Episode 8 Page 19

NICHOLAS: Hello! Is anyone…

SFX: Footsteps

NICHOLAS: Hi, I’m a bit lost, and…

SCENE 10

SFX: Cello tuning stops

THOMAS: Oh. I did not see you. I apologize.

NICHOLAS: No, no, it’s fine. Can you… tell me where I am?

THOMAS: Not really. I didn’t mean to end up here. Did you mean to end up here?

NICHOLAS: No.

THOMAS: That’s sad. For both of us.

NICHOLAS: I’m Nicholas, by the way. Nice to meet you.

THOMAS: Yes it is.

(A beat)

NICHOLAS: And you are?

THOMAS: I’m not exactly sure

NICHOLAS: Why do you… sound the way you do? If I can ask?

THOMAS: I am fading.

NICHOLAS: Oh. I apologize.

THOMAS: It is not your fault. Blame the closing of the door. Or mortal attachments. I was so
fond of those.

NICHOLAS: Ah. That was a lovely song, you were playing.

THOMAS: Thank you! I was practicing. Would you like to hear me play a song in earnest?
 Episode 8 Page 20

NICHOLAS: I would… but… do you know of a way out of here? I’m afraid I’m a bit lost.

THOMAS: I should play you a song. That might help.

MUSIC: Thomas sings a cello based song.

NICHOLAS: Thank you.

THOMAS: I forgot how…

SFX: More tape weirdness

SCENE 11

SFX: Teleportation noise

NICHOLAS: [gasping]

STATIC MAN: (Air drumming, making drumming mouth sounds)

NICHOLAS: Static Man?

STATIC MAN: What in the goddamn hell?

NICHOLAS: Hello.

STATIC MAN: Dude. What are you doing here?

NICHOLAS: I’m… lost.

STATIC MAN: Well no shit, Sherlock. Sorry man, it’s tough for me to wrap my head around, is
this…

NICHOLAS: Are we moving past the fact that you were like, air-drumming, to yourself?

STATIC MAN: Dude. I was riffing! And I’m stuck here for the majority of my existence, you do
not get to judge.

NICHOLAS: I’m not judging.

STATIC MAN: So… why the hell are you here? I didn’t think that was possible?

NICHOLAS: My blindfold fell off in Melody’s home and I...

 Episode 8 Page 21

STATIC MAN: Got stuck in a liminal state, traversing the space between the realm of reality and
the realm of magic? Makes sense.

NICHOLAS: And I’m fairly certain Payphone is to blame.

STATIC MAN: That dipshit. Screwing us over even after we killed it. Who does that?

NICHOLAS: Beings with power.

STATIC MAN: Yeah. You doing ok, my man?

NICHOLAS: Not particularly.

STATIC MAN: Shit, I feel ya. You wouldn’t happen to have brought anything with you, right?

NICHOLAS: No Popeye’s. I apologize.

STATIC MAN: Worth a shot. So, my man, what’s wrong?

NICHOLAS: Generalized feelings of failure and inadequacy. Not worth delving into.

STATIC MAN: You sure?

NICHOLAS: I’d feel… embarrassed talking about it.

STATIC MAN: Dude, you walked in on me playing the drum parts to In The Air Tonight.

NICHOLAS: [laughs] When you… got started down this path, did you think you would
eventually...

STATIC MAN: Feel powerful?

NICHOLAS: Exactly

STATIC MAN: I mean, that’s what I thought would happen. And here’s the thing, it kind of does,
it’s like, whoa, here’s this whole other world that only a few mystical badasses know about. But
then, there’s always people who are bigger than you waiting to fuck you over, you know? And
you don’t actually know a whole hell of a lot, when it comes down to it. Right?

NICHOLAS: Yeah.

STATIC MAN: And then they turn you into a sentient orb of static and teeth that only partially
exists but is really good at killing people. C’est la fucking vie.
 Episode 8 Page 22

NICHOLAS: Well, we just need to become powerful enough to change you back.

STATIC MAN: Here’s to that. So, you want a way out of here?

NICHOLAS: Very much so. Christine’s probably worried about me.

STATIC MAN: Yeah, I can make that happen.

NICHOLAS: Thank you. Once this is over, I’ll get you some Popeye’s.

STATIC MAN: I’ll hold you to that. Alright dude, just…

SFX: Tape weirdness

SCENE 12

SFX: Teleportation

NICHOLAS: [gasping]

CHRISTINE: Nicholas! Melody, he’s back!

NICHOLAS: I’m… I’m

MELODY: The dronebox is almost finished! Put your blindfold back on!

SFX: Shuffling

NICHOLAS: Ok, OK

CHRISTINE: Oh god, I was so worried about you.

MELODY: And stop recording, it’ll-

SFX: Tape stops

TAPE BREAK MUSIC

SCENE 13

NICHOLAS: -be fine.

CHRISTINE: OK. So he looked just like you?

 Episode 8 Page 23

NICHOLAS: Older. But yes.

CHRISTINE: That’s goddamn weird.

NICHOLAS: I won’t argue that point.

CHRISTINE: And Static Man just… air drums into the void?

NICHOLAS: It appears that way.

CHRISTINE: God, that’s depressing. We should like, get him Popeye’s.

NICHOLAS: We will. I want to head to the library first.

CHRISTINE: You’re such a goddamn nerd, you know that, right?

NICHOLAS: They’ll have the architectural blueprints for the cult’s compound, it’s… wait, is the
recorder on?

CHRISTINE: Ugh, are you kidding me? Turn it off?

NICHOLAS: What’s the point, we’ll just go straight to the library, maybe it’s a sign that we
should be recording.

CHRISTINE: Whatever. Still creepy.

NICHOLAS: Come on, I’m going to show you the wonders of the library…

SFX: Door opens

SFX: High pitched whine

SFX: Footsteps

SFX: Weird magical teleportation sound

NICHOLAS: [gasping]

CHRISTINE: [gasping] Where the goddamn hell are we?

NICHOLAS: Oh no, oh no, I thought it was the A/C, I didn’t hear the sound. I just… didn’t…

SFX: Radio bursts on

 Episode 8 Page 24

ALEISTER: Hello Nicholas and Christine. There is a two-way radio in the center of the room.
Push the button and talk into the microphone.