SELF CONCEPT - Exist between the two

selves which is complex

- Awareness of yourself.
because there are
SELF IMAGE numerous exchanges
between the ideal and
- What do you see in
actual self. These
yourself.
exchanges are
SELF KNOWLEDGE exemplified in social roles
that are adjusted and
- Derive from social readjusted and are
interactions that provide derived from outcomes of
insights into how others social interactions from
react to you. infant to adult
IDEAL SELF development.

- Self you aspire to be. INCONGRUENCE

- The one you hope will - Lack of alignment will
possess characteristics result in mental distress
similar to that of a or anxiety.
mentor or some other
worldly figure.
- How we want to be.
PERSONAL EFFECTIVENESS
- Idealized the image that
we have developed over - means making use of all
time. the personal resources.

ACTUAL SELF
- Self that has DETERMINATION
characteristics that you
- Allows you to focus only
were nurtured or born to
on achieving a specific
have.
goal without being
- Built on self-knowledge
distracted by less
(derived from social
important things or
interactions that provide
spontaneous desires.
insight into how others
react to you). SELF CONFIDENCE
- Who we actually are, it is
- Appears in the process of
how we think, how we
personal development.
feel, look and act.
- Result of becoming aware
- Our self-image.
of yourself, your actions
NEGOTIATION and their consequences.
 - Manifested in Speech, - Watch the movie of their
appearance, dressing, lives, admire some parts
gait and physical and criticize others.
condition. - They do nothing else.
- No control of their lives.
- Pathetic, miserable
people.

PERSISTENCE
- makes you keep moving ACTOR
forward regardless of
- Not only watch the movie
emerging obstacles.
of her life
MANAGING STRESS - can control a big part of
her life.
- Helps Combat Stress that
- Can make or break the
arises in daily life from
movie.
the environment and
- How she delivers her line
other people.
and how she portrays her
PROBLEM SOLVING character.
SKILLS - Happy bunch, enjoy some
level of control.
- Help cope with the - Wish the movie would
problems encountered end in another way but
with a lack of experience. realize that they have no
CREATIVITY say in such things.

- Allows you to find SCRIPTWRITER

extraordinary ways to - Not only watch, doesn't
carry out a specific action only act, but creates the
that no one has tried to entire movie from her
use. mind.
GENERATING IDEAS - Enormous control over
life.
- Helps you achieve goals - Seeing the movie of her
using new, original, life will turn out beautiful.
unconventional ideas.

ASPECTS OF YOUR
KINDS OF PEOPLE DEVELOPMENT
MOVIE GOER PHYSICAL SELF
- Describe yourself - Represented by several
aspects of the self.
INTELLECTUAL SELF
- Conceived as collection of
- assessment of how you multiple context
will reason and solve dependent service.
problems.
DIFFERENT ASPECT OF THE
- Capacity to learn and
SELF
create.
- General amount of PHYSICAL OR TANGIBLE
knowledge. ASPECTS
EMOTIONAL SELF - Relate to the body
- feelings you have INTELLECTUAL AND
- feelings you seldom have, CONCIOUS ASPECT
try to avoid, especially
- Relate to the mind
enjoy, past and present.
EMOTIONAL AND
SENSUAL SELF
INTUITIVE ASPECTS
- sense (sight, hearing,
- Relate to this spirit.
speaking, smelling,
touching).
INTERACTION SELF DEVELOPMENT
- How you interact with - Progressive series of
others. change that occurs in an
orderly predictable
NUTRITIONAL SELF
pattern as a result of
- foods you like, dislike. maturation and
experience from
CONTEXTUAL SELF
conception of death.
- maintenance of your - Covers the physical,
living environment. cognitive and
psychosocial aspects of a
SPIRITUAL SELF OR LIFE
human person.
FORCE
BASIC CONCEPTS OF
- How you feel in this area.
DEVELOPMENT
- feelings about yourself in
an organized religion. GROWTH

SELF CONCEPT - quantitative in

perspective.
- Example, an increase of able to accept and
height and weight of a undertake responsibilities
child. signifies the maturity of
- Physiological changes an individual.
become dramatically
HEREDITY
evident, the comparison
between adolescents - When others see you as a
becomes very visible. carbon copy of either of
your parents, then
DEVELOPMENT
heredity is at work.
- Changes that take place - Physical makeup is
from the conception of genetically shaped and
the child up to his or her influenced by your
death. parents.
- According to Delena et
PRINCIPLE OF DEVELOPMENT
al., As stated by Corpuz,
these would include - Sequential
growth and decline, which - Distinct
could either be positive or - Holistic
negative. - Active
- Sees the qualitative
DEVELOPMENT OF
changes in an individual.
SEQUENTIAL
- Example, a child's
perspective of the Cephalocaudal principle
reasons why he goes to
school definitely changes - Obviously, infants are
as he develops into adult. able to move their heads
first before the arms and
MATURITY legs. This way, the
sequence of development
- Comer and Gould explain
comes first from the
that this process is
upper portion of the body
biologically programmed
down to the lower
to happen sequentially.
extremities, that it from
This mental progress
up to bottom.
varies in different life
stages. As the adolescent Proximodistal principle
is given greater
opportunities, he is able - Growth starts at the
to understand that this is center of the body and
part and parcel of the moves towards the
whole series of life. Being extremities.
- Example, early DEVELOPMENT STAGES IN
development of muscular MIDDLE AND LATE
control of the trunk and ADOLESCENCE
arms relative to the
hands and fingers.
PERSONAL TIMELINE
DEVELOPMENT IS
DISTINCT - Portrays the influential
events and happenings of
- Age and level of
a person's life so that he
maturation differs among
can understand where he
individuals.
has gone wrong and right
- People mature at varying
in the past.
stages.
- No exact age as to when
the person matures.
STAGES OF DEVELOPMENT
DEVELOPMENT HOLISTIC
HUMAN DEVELOPMENT
- development covers the
- Focuses on human growth
overall aspect of a human
and changes across the
person physiological,
lifespan, including
cognitive, socio-emotional
physical, cognitive, social,
Dimension.
intellectual, perceptual,
DEVELOPMENT IS ACTIVE personality, and
emotional growth.
- Unstoppable
- in any phase of life,
whether one is a child,
Human beings are either in a
teenager, or even old
state of growth or decline,
age, development of
but either condition imparts
course. It is never
change.
passive. However,
development may be
positive or negative.
Physical growth is an
example of positive PRE-NATAL (CONCEPTION
development while aging TO BIRTH)
and memory loss is an
example of negative - When hereditary
development. endowments and sex are
fixed and all body
features, both external
 and internal are EARLY ADULTHOOD (18
developed. TO 40 YEARS)
INFANCY (BIRTH TO 2 - Age of adjustment to new
YEARS) patterns of life and roles
such as spouse, parent
- Foundation age when
and breadwinner.
basic behavior is
organized, and many MIDDLE AGE (40 YEARS
ontogenetic maturation TO RETIREMENT)
skills are developed.
- Transition age when
EARLY CHILDHOOD (2 TO adjustments to initial
6 YEARS) physical and mental
decline are experienced.
- Pre-gang age,
Exploratory, and OLD AGE (RETIREMENT
questioning. Language TO DEATH)
and elementary reasoning
- Retirement age when
are required at initial
increasingly rapid
socialization experience.
physical and mental
LATE CHILDHOOD (6 TO decline are experienced.
12 YEARS)
ROBERT J. HAVIGHURST
- Gang and creativity age
- Development tasks
when self-help skills,
theory
social skills, and play are
- continuous throughout
developed.
the entire lifespan,
occurring in stages,
where the individual
ADOLESCENCE (PUBERTY
moves from one stage to
TO 18 YEARS)
the next by means of
- Transition age from successful resolution of
childhood to adulthood problems or performance
when sex maturation and of developmental tasks.
rapid physical - Havighurst proposed a
development occur bio psychosocial model of
resulting to changes in development.
ways of feelings, thinking
INFANCY AND EARLY
and acting.
CHILDHOOD (0-5)
- learning to walk
- learning to take solid - achieving mature
foods relations with both sexes
- learning to talk - achieving a masculine or
- learning to control the feminine social role
elimination of body - accepting one's physique
wastes - achieving emotional
- learning sex differences independence of adults
and sexual modesty - preparing for a marriage
- acquiring concepts and and family life
language to describe - preparing for an
social and physical reality economic career
- readiness for reading - acquiring values and an
- learning to distinguish ethical system to guide
right from wrong and behavior
developing a conscience - desiring and achieving
socially responsibility
MIDDLE CHILDHOOD (6-
behavior
12)
EARLY ADULTHOOD (19-
- learning physical skills
30)
necessary for ordinary
games - selecting a mate
- building a wholesome - learning to live with a
attitude toward oneself partner
- learning to get along with - starting a family
age mates - rearing children
- learning an appropriate - managing a home
sex role - starting an occupation
- developing fundamental - assuming responsibility
skills in writing, reading,
MIDDLE ADULTHOOD (30-
and calculating
60)
- developing concepts
necessary for everyday - helping teenage children
living to become happy and
- developing conscience, responsible adults
morality, and a skill of - achieving adult social and
values. civic responsibility
- Achieving personal - satisfactory career
independence achievement
- developing acceptable - developing adult leisure
attitudes towards society time activities
ADOLESCENCE (13-18)
- relating to one's spouse understanding how they
as a person think and feel.
- accepting the
CULTIVATE INSIGHT
physiological changes of
middle age - see life as it is, allowing
- adjusting to aging parent each experience to be an
opportunity for learning.
LATER MATURITY (61+)
PRACTICE COMPASSION
- adjusting to decreasing
strength and health - Consider the thoughts
- adjusting to retirement and feelings of others and
and reduce income let tenderness, kindness
- adjusting to death of and empathy be your
spouse guides.
- establishing relations with
one's own age group
- meeting social and civic LIMIT REACTIVITY
obligations
- establishing satisfactory - observe rather than be
living quarters controlled by your
emotions. Pause, breathe,
LIVING MINDFULLY and choose a skillful
response based on
- like being an artist
thoughtful speech and
- you need the right tools
nonviolence under every
to practice your craft, and
condition.
you need to constantly
refine your technique to EXPRESS GRATITUDE
achieve your creative
potential. - Practice gratitude daily
and expand it outward,
BREATHE MINDFULLY appreciating everyone
and everything you
- use your breath as an
encounter.
anchor to steal your mind
and bring your focus back NURTURE MUTUAL
to the present moment. RESPECT
LISTEN DEEPLY - Appreciate our common
humanity and value
- listen with intention; let
different perspectives as
others fully express
well as your own.
themselves and focus on
BUILD INTEGRITY
- cultivate constructive
values and consistently
act from respect, honesty
and kindness.
FOSTER LEADERSHIP
- engage fully in life and
community. Share your
unique talents and
generosity so that others
can also be inspired.
BE PEACE
- cultivate your own inner
peace, becoming an
agent for compassionate
action and social good.
ls what | want to say True? her from doing things
independently.
Is what | want to say Helpful?
- Starts to want both
Am I the best one to Say it? physical and emotional
intimacy in relationships.
Is it necessary to say it Now?
- The experience of
Is it Kind to this person and intimate partnerships.
others?

SOCIAL DEVELOPMENT
THE PASSAGE OF ADULTHOOD:
- shifts in relationship with
CHALLENGES OF LATE
parents from dependency
ADOLESCENCE
and subordination to one
that reflects the
adolescent’s increasing
PHYSICAL DEVELOPMENT maturity and
- Most girls have responsibilities in the
completed the physical family and the
changes related to community
puberty by age 15. - Is more and more aware
- Boys are still maturing of social behaviors of
and gaining strength, friends.
muscle mass, and height - Seeks friends that share
and are completing the the same beliefs, values,
development of sexual and interests.
traits. - Friends become more
important.
EMOTIONAL DEVELOPMENT - Starts to have more
- May stress over school intellectual interests.
and test scores. - Explores romantic and
- Is self-involved (may have sexual behaviors with
high expectations and low others.
self-concept). - May be influenced by
- Seeks privacy and time peers to try risky
alone. behaviors (alcohol,
- ls concerned about tobacco, sex).
physical and sexual
attractiveness.
- May complain that MENTAL DEVELOPMENT
parents prevent him or
 - Becomes better able to developed by psychiatrist Alfred
set goals and think in Adler in the early 20" century
terms of the future. and continued to evolve
- Has a better through the work of Adler's
understanding of complex follower Rudolph Dreikurs.
problems and issues. However, even today, relatively
- Starts to develop moral few educators, parents,
ideals and to select role psychologists, leaders or
models. couples have utilized this
valuable concept. Most of the
time, people mistakenly use a
technique like praise in an
effort to “encourage” others.
ENCOURAGEMENT 101: the
courage to be imperfect by
Timothy D. Evans,Ph.D.
Half the job of encouragement
Encouragement is the key lies in avoiding discouraging
ingredient for improving your words and actions. When
relationships with others. It is children or adults misbehave, it
the single most important skill is usually because they are
necessary for getting along discouraged. Instead of building
with others — so important that them up, we tear them down;
the lack of it could be instead of recognizing their
considered the primary cause efforts and improvements, we
of conflict and misbehavior. point out mistakes; instead of
Encouragement develops a allowing them to belong
person’s psychological through shared decision-making
hardiness and social interest. and meaningful contributions,
Encouragement is the lifeblood we isolate and label them.
of a relationship. And yet, this
simple concept is often very
hard to put into practice. Most of us are skilled
discouragers. We have learned
how to bribe, reward and, when
Encouragement is not a new that fails, to punish, criticize,
idea. Its spiritual connotation nag, threaten, interrogate and
dates back to the Bible in emotionally withdraw. We do
Hebrews 3:11 which states this as an attempt to control
“Encourage one another daily.” those we love, bolstered by the
Encouragement, as a mistaken belief that we are
psychological idea, was responsible for the behavior of
everyone around us, especially you when you do it well
our spouses and children. enough, fast enough and get it
These attempts to control all correct. Encouragement
behavior create atmospheres of develops children’s
tension and conflict in many psychological hardiness -their
houses. ability to function and recover
when things aren't going their
way.
Most commonly, we discourage
in five general ways:
Encouragement enhances a
- We set standards that are
feeling of belonging which leads
too high for others to
to greater social interest. Social
meet because we are
interest is the tendency for
overly ambitious.
people to unite themselves with
- We focus on mistakes as
other human beings and to
a way to motivate change
accomplish their tasks in
or improved behavior.
cooperation with others. The
- We make constant
Junior League mission of
comparisons (self to
“developing the potential of
others, siblings to one
women and improving
another).
communities through the
- We automatically give a
effective action and leadership
negative spin to the
of trained volunteers” is rooted
actions of others.
in the idea of social interest.
- We dominate others by
being overly helpful, The first step to becoming an
implying that they are encouraging person is to learn
unable to do it as well. to distinguish encouragement
from discouragement. As a rule,
Encouragement is not a
ask yourself: Whatever | say or
technique nor is it a special
do, will it bring me closer
language used to gain
together or farther apart from
compliance. Encouragement
this person?
conveys the idea that all human
beings are worthwhile, simply We all have the power to be
because they exist. In one more encouraging people. The
sentence, Mr. Rogers does more choice, as always, is yours.
for a child’s sense of adequacy
than a hundred instances of
praise when he says, “I like you
just the way you are.” Not | like
THE POWER OF PERSONAL setting into action what you
DECLARATIONS by Dr. Emily De really want to occur. You can
Carlo declare that goodness and
mercy shall surely follow you all
the days of your life!
So often we accept the
declarations that others have
made concerning our own lives, The following are some
well-being or fate. It is declarations that you may want
imperative that we recognize to make concerning your life:
that in order to achieve what
I declare:
we want in life, we must not
give our power away to others - that I am totally free of all
by accepting their declarations addictions.
concerning our affairs. When - that I will survive any
one decides that he or she will attempts of others to
boldly declare good fortune, control my life.
wellness, joy, etc. relative to his - that I am free in my mind,
or her life, all of heaven will body, and emotions.
break loose! Goodness and
Being happy is not inevitable
mercy shall surely follow.
fate, but a victory for those who
can travel towards it with your
own being.
From birth, we are often told
what we are going to be.
Sometimes, this is a good thing,
Being happy is to stop being a
but suppose you have been told
victim of problems but become
time and time again that “you
an actor in history itself. It is
will not amount to anything just
not only to cross the deserts
like your mother or father"?
outside of ourselves, but still
This is a dangerous declaration
more, to be able to find an
because it sets into motion the
oasis in the recesses of our
actualization of an unwanted
soul. It is to thank God every
occurrence. All of us want to
morning for the miracle of life.
amount to something! In order
to counteract this and all of the
negative declarations with their
destructive potential, one must Being happy is not being afraid
consciously replace them with of one's feelings. It is to know
one's own declarations. In so how to talk about ourselves. It
doing, you are now in control of is to bear with courage when
hearing a "no". It is to have the
security to receive criticism, Never give up ... Never give up
even if is unfair. It is to kiss the on the people you love. Never
children, pamper the parents, give up from
have poetic moments with
friends, even if they have hurt
us. being happy because life is an
incredible show. And you are a
special human being!
Being happy means allowing
the free, happy and simple child
inside each of us to live; having STRESS MANAGEMENT
the maturity to say, "| was
Dictionary definitions do not
wrong"; having the audacity to
quite capture the meaning of
say, "forgive me”. It is to have
stress as it is seen and
sensitivity in expressing, "|
experienced in the world of
need you"; to have the ability of
work. One of the Webster's
saying, "| love you." So that
definitions describes it as an
your life becomes a garden full
“...emotional factor that causes
of opportunities for being
bodily or mental tension.”
happy...

A practical way of defining

In your spring-time, may you
stress is the feeling one gets
become a lover of joy. In your
from prolonged, pent-up
winter, may you become a
emotions. If the emotions you
friend of wisdom. And when you
experience are pleasant and
go wrong along the way, you
desirable — joy, elation,
start all over again. Thus you
ecstasy, delight — you usually
will be more passionate about
feel free to let them show. They
life. And you will find that
are not suppressed. Therefore,
happiness is not about having a
positive emotions do not
perfect life but about using
usually cause stress. Negative
tears to water tolerance, losses
emotions, on the other hand,
to refine patience, failures to
are more often held inside.
carve serenity, pain to lapidate
They are hidden. You suffer
pleasure, obstacles to open the
quietly and you experience
windows of intelligence.
stress. Do not confuse positive
situations with positive
emotions. A wedding, for
example, is a positive situation
that often brings about
negative emotions of anxiety Everyday frustrations cause
and tension. So, stress can exist stress build-up
in great situations.

From the time you wake up

Causes and Effects of Stress until you go to sleep, you may
be confronted with a succession
Just as there is great variety in
of stressful situations.
the range of emotions you
Managing to get yourself (and
might experience, there are
possibly a spouse and children)
many possible manifestations
out of bed and ready to face
of stress — in your private life
the day can be a challenge to
and in your working life. Here
your patience and ingenuity.
are some words that describe
Driving to school or work can
the emotions associated (as
be harrowing — especially if
cause and effect) with stress.
you’re running late. You may
- Anxiety experience frustration in
- Pressure arranging to get the car
- Misery repaired. You may face conflicts
- Strain in school or at work, such as
- Desperation coping with unrealistic
- Tension deadlines, equipment failures,
- Anger or unexpected
- Panic
bad weather. If part of your job
- Dejection
is selling, you may experience
Prolonged stress can be feelings of rejection when most
devastating; burnout, of your customers say “no.”
breakdown, and depression are
some of the potential results of
long term, unmanaged stress. A series of stressful and
By wearing a mask, you may frustrating experiences
expect to hide stress caused by throughout the day can cause
problems in your personal life you to lie awake at night in an
and not let them influence your emotional turmoil — unable to
performance on the job. This get needed rest. You face the
will probably not work. The next day with less emotional
more you try to hold your and physical stamina. After
emotions in, the greater the another stressful day and
pressure build up will be. another night without rest, you
may have even less emotional
strength and stability.
Therefore, stress build up, if not - Decreases overall
resolved, continues day after performance
day. - Perceived outside coping
mechanisms (i.e.
something we cannot
Problems in our personal life handle)
can be devastating - Can lead to physical
illness/ mental fatigue/

Surviving the normal, everyday

stress described above can be
difficult. But far more serious
and painful circumstances can
create long term stress. More
serious stressful circumstances
may include separation from
loved ones, personal illness, or
illness of a loved one, death of
someone you care about, or
conflict with a spouse or close
friend. Other major causes of
stress are problems with drug
and ...

UESTRESS
- Positive
- Energises
- Generally short-term
- Can improve performance
- Believed within coping
mechanisms (i.e.
something we can
handle)
DISTRESS
- Generally feels
unpleasant
- Often depletes energy
- Short-term or long-term
4 Factors That Can Affect Your
Self Esteem

1. Your Childhood
2. The Media
3. Friends and Family
4. Work Environment.

Thoughts drive your emotions,

‘what you think you become’ —
Guatama Buddha. When your
thoughts appear to be the Why Are Self-Esteem and Body
product of your overwhelming Image Important?
sadness and grief, know that it
is your thoughts that are Self-esteem is all about how
feeding the sadness rather than much you feel you are worth —
the other way around. Your and how much you feel other
thoughts generate a feeling people value you. Self-esteem
which you then act upon. is important because feeling
good about yourself can affect
your mental health and how
you behave.
People with high self-esteem
know themselves well. They're
realistic and find friends that
like and appreciate them for
who they are. People with high
self-esteem usually feel more in
control of their lives and know
their own strengths and
weaknesses.
Body image is how you view
your physical self — including
whether you feel you are
attractive and whether others
like your looks. For many
people, especially people in
their early teens, body image be too focused on looking a
can be closely linked to self- certain way or "making weight"
esteem. for a sports team. Family
members might struggle with
What Influences a Person's
their own body image or
Self-Esteem?
criticize their kids’ looks (“why
Puberty and Development do you wear your hair so long?"
or "how come you can't wear
Some people struggle with their
pants that fit you?"). This can
self-esteem and body image
all influence a person's self-
when they begin puberty
esteem specially if they're
because it's a time when the
sensitive to others peoples’
body goes through many
comments.
changes. These changes
combined with wanting to feel People also may experience
accepted by our friends, means negative comments and hurtful
it can be tempting to compare teasing about the way they look
ourselves with others. The from classmates and peers.
trouble with that is, not Although these often come
everyone grows or develops at from ignorance, sometimes
the same time or in the same they can affect body image and
way. self-esteem.

Media Images and Other

Outside Influences
Common Eating Disorders
Our tweens and early teens are
The most common eating
a time when we become more
disorders are anorexia nervosa
aware of celebrities and media
and bulimia nervosa (usually
images — as well as how other
called simply "anorexia" and
kids look and how we fit in. We
“bulimia"). But other food-
might start to compare
related disorders, like
ourselves with other people or
avoidant/restrictive food intake
media images ("ideals" that are
disorder, binge eating, body
frequently airbrushed). All of
image disorders, and food
this can affect how we feel
phobias, are becoming more
about ourselves and our bodies
and more commonly identified.
even as we grow into our teens.
1. Anorexia
Families and School
People with anorexia have a
Family life can sometimes
real fear of weight gain and a
influence our body image.
distorted view of their body size
Some parents or coaches might
and shape. As a result, they eat pizza, then deciding to go to
very little and can become the gym the next day and eat
dangerously underweight. Many more healthfully:
teens with anorexia restrict
People with bulimia eat a large
their food intake by dieting,
amount of food (often junk
fasting, or excessive exercise.
food) at once, usually in secret.
They hardly eat at all — and the
Sometimes they eat food that is
small amount of food they do
not cooked or might be still
eat becomes an obsession in
frozen or retrieve food from the
terms of calorie counting or
trash. They typically feel
trying to eat as little as
powerless to stop eating and
possible. Others with anorexia
can only stop once they're too
may start binge eating and
full to eat any more, or they
purging — eating a lot of food
may have to go to extreme
and then trying to get rid of the
measures (like pouring salt all
calories by making themselves
over a dessert to make it
throw up, using some type of
inedible) in order to get
medication or laxatives, or
themselves to stop eating. Most
exercising excessively, or some
people with bulimia then purge
combination of these.
by vomiting, but also may use
2. Bulimia laxatives or excessive exercise.
Bulimia is similar to anorexia. Although anorexia and bulimia
With bulimia, people might are very similar, people with
binge eat (eat to excess) and anorexia are usually very thin
then try to compensate in and underweight, but those
extreme ways, such as making with bulimia may be an average
themselves throw up or weight or can be overweight.
exercising all the time, to
prevent weight gain. Over time,
these steps can be dangerous EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE
— both physically and
IQ stands for “intellectual
emotionally. They can also lead
quotient.” It can help predict
to compulsive behaviors (ones
how well someone may do
that are hard to stop). To have
academically.
bulimia, a person must be
binging and purging regularly, Spatial intelligence is the ability
at least once a week for a to think in 3D. Musical
couple of months. Binge eating intelligence is the ability to
is different from going to a recognize rhythm, cadence, and
party and “pigging out" on tone. Athletic, artistic, and
mechanical abilities are other mood like happiness or
types of intelligence. One sadness. Being able to notice
important type of intelligence is and accurately label these
emotional intelligence. everyday feelings is the most
basic of all the EQ skills. Being
What Is Emotional
aware of emotions — simply
Intelligence?
noticing them as we feel them
Emotional intelligence is the — helps us manage our own
ability to understand, use, and emotions. It also helps us
manage our emotions. understand how other people
feel. But some people might go
Emotional intelligence is
through the entire day without
sometimes called EQ (or El) for
really noticing their emotions.
short. Just as a high IQ can
Practice recognizing emotions
predict top test scores, a high
as you feel them. Label them in
EQ can predict success in social
your mind (for example, by
and emotional situations. EQ
saying to yourself "I feel
helps us build strong
grateful,” "I feel frustrated,"
relationships, make good
etc.). Make it a daily habit to be
decisions, and deal with difficult
aware of your emotions.
situations.
Understanding How Others Feel
One way to think about EQ is
and Why
that it's part of being people
smart. Understanding and People are naturally designed
getting along with people helps to try to understand others. Part
us be successful in almost any of EQ is being able to imagine
area of life. In fact, some how other people might feel in
studies show that EQ is more certain situations. It is also
important than IQ when it about understanding why they
comes to doing well in school or feel the way they do. Being
being successful at work. able to imagine what emotions
a person is likely to be feeling
(even when you don't actually
Improving Your EQ know) is called empathy.
Empathy helps us care about
Being Aware of Your Emotions others and build good
Most people feel many different friendships and relationships. It
emotions throughout the day. guides us on what to say and
Some feelings (like surprise) how to behave around someone
last just a few seconds. Others who is feeling strong emotions.
may stay longer, creating a Managing Emotional Reactions
We all got angry. We all have would act like little kids,
disappointments. Often, it's expressing their emotions
important to express how you physically through stomping,
feel. But managing your crying, hitting, yelling, and
reaction means knowing when, losing control!
where, and how to express
Some of the skills that make up
yourself. When you understand
emotional intelligence develop
your emotions and know how to
earlier. They may seem easier:
manage them, you can use self-
For example, recognizing
control to hold a reaction if now
emotions seems easy once we
is not the right time or place to
know what to pay attention to.
express it. Someone who has
But the EQ skill of managing
good EQ knows it can damage
emotional reactions ‘and
relationships to react to
choosing a mood might seem
emotions in a way that's
harder to master. That's
disrespectful, too intense, too
because the part of the brain
impulsive, or harmful.
that's responsible for self-
Choosing Your Mood management continues to
mature beyond our teen years.
Part of managing emotions is
But practice helps those brain
choosing our moods. Moods are
pathways develop.
emotional states that last a bit.
We have the power to decide We can all work to build even
what mood is right for a stronger emotional intelligence
situation, and then to get into skills just by recognizing what
that mood. Choosing the right we feel, understanding how we
mood can help someone get got there, understanding how
motivated, concentrate on a others feel and why, and
task, or try again instead of putting our emotions into
giving up. People with good EQ heartfelt words when we need
know that moods aren't just to.
things that happen to us. We
TYPES OF RESPONSES
can control them by knowing
which mood is best for a Passive response: Behaving
particular situation and how to passively means not expressing
get into that mood. your own needs and feelings; or
expressing them so weakly that
EQ: Under Construction
they will not be addressed.
Emotional intelligence is
- lf Geneva behaves
something that develops as we
passively; by standing in
get older. If it didn't, all adults
line and not saying
 anything, she will physical attack on
probably feel angry with Geneva.
the girls and herself. If - An aggressive response is
the ticket office runs out never in your best
of tickets before she gets interest, because it
to the head of the line, almost always leads to
she will be furious and increased conflict
might blow up at the girls
Assertive response: Behaving
after it's too late to
assertively means asking for
change the situation.
what you want or saying how
- A passive response is not
you feel in an honest and
usually in your best
respectful way that does not
interest, because it allows
infringe on another person's
other people to violate
rights or put the individual
your rights. Yet there are
down.
times when being passive
is the most appropriate - If Geneva tells the girls
response. It is important they need to go to the
to assess whether a end of the line because
situation is dangerous other people have been
and choose the response waiting, she will not put
most likely to keep you the girls down, but merely
safe. state the facts of the
situation. She can feel
Aggressive response:
proud for standing up for
Behaving aggressively is asking
her rights. At the same
for what you want or saying
time, she will probably be
how you feel in a threatening,
supported in her
sarcastic or humiliating way
statement by other
that may offend the other
people in the line. While
person(s).
there is a good chance
- If Geneva calls the girls the girls will feel
names or threatens them, embarrassed and move,
she may feel strong for a there is also the chance
moment, but there is no that they will ignore
guarantee she will get the Geneva, and her needs
girls to leave. More will not be met.
importantly, the girls and - An assertive response is
their friends may also almost always in your
respond aggressively, best interest, since it is
through a verbal or your best chance of
 getting what you want
without offending the
other person(s). At times,
however, being assertive
can be inappropriate. If
tempers are high, if
people have been using
alcohol or other drugs, if
people have weapons or
if you are in an unsafe
place, being assertive
may not be the safest
choice.
BRAIN STEM
- Involuntary movement
CEREBRUM
- largest part of the brain